Eve1313
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Joined 05-09-09, id: 1929291, Profile Updated: 09-02-10
Author has written 2 stories for Twilight, and Dark Guardian series.

Let's see. Well, I have more contradictions about myself than anyone I know. I show that stereotypes are not always true.

-First, I'm a country girl that loves to read and write. I also love to go mud boggin' and hunt, though.|
-Second, I'm a straight A student that hates school, doesn't study or cheat, and has a social life.
-Third, I'm a tomboy that likes to wear make-up and fix her hair.
-Fourth, I was in both a school band and a rock band.
-Fifth, I love screamo music and classical music.
-Sixth, I love to draw and shoot guns. target practice mainly and huntin'
-Seventh, I love to play games that teenagers my age call 'kiddie games.'
-Eighth, I love the mystery aspect of history, yet I hate the history classes.
-Ninth, I'm on my school's Quiz Bowl, and I'm not a know-it-all.
-Tenth, I don't agree with abortion or same-sex marriages, but I don't look down on those that have either.
-Eleventh, I'm a poor Republican.


Some of my favorite books are the Twilight Saga, (particularly Eclipse and Breaking Dawn) Dark Guardians, Darkest Powers, Mortal Instruments, 1-800-Where-R-You, Vampire Kisses, and a few others. A few mangas I like would be Vampire Knights, (except for the ending!) Crimson Hero, Fruits Basket, Wild Ones, and a couple others. I have too many favorite movies to count, but I must say my favorite romantic movie will have to be Letters to Juliet. It's just so sweet!:) My birthday is October 13, 1993. I have to save off of Twilight there are three guys that I would pick: EMMETT:), JACOB:), and PAUL:)


-RANDOM QUOTES:
"My best friend is better than your best friend, so put that in your juice box and SUCK IT!!"

-FRIEND FACTS:
a FRIEND will plan ways to hurt the guy that hurt you. a BEST FRIEND will actually do those plans.
a FRIEND will bail you out of jail. a BEST FRIEND will be sitting next to you saying "HELL YEAH!! LET'S DO THAT AGAIN!!"
a FRIEND will ask bout your romantic live. a BEST FRIEND can blackmail you with it.
a FRIEND will help you up when you fall. a BEST FRIEND will laugh at you and trip you again.
a FRIEND will comfort you when he rejects you. a BEST FRIEND will walk up to him and ask "It's cause you're gay, isn't it?"

-Friend Skit
There are two high school girls. One is comforting the other because her boyfriend broke up with her. The friend sees the boy drinking a Coke and confronts him.
"If I was your girlfriend, I would of poison your Coke." she said to him
He replies, "If I was your boyfriend, I would drink it!"

-Movie/TV Show Quotes:

"She thinks we cheat."
-Emmett, Twilight

"Yes, it would be nice not wanting to kill you."
-Jasper, Twilight Saga: New Moon

"What are you gunna put on your resume? Dumbass."
-Red, 70s Show

"EVERYWHERE I LOOK NOW IT'S SEX!SEX!SEX! Well, it's digusting and I for one will not have it in my basement!"
-Forman, 70s Show

"ES-SCAP-A! That's funny. It's spell like escape."
-Dory, Finding Nemo

"Excuse me, Mr. Turtle?" said Marlin.
"Dude, Mr. Turtle's my father." said Crush.
-Marlin & Crush, Finding Nemo

"Coo coo cachu, they find their way back to the big, old blue."
-Crush, Finding Nemo

"His name's emo" "Nemo" "I mean Nemo!"
-Dory & Marlin, Finding Nemo


What A Boyfriend Should Do/Remember

When she walks away from you mad, follow her

When she stare's at your mouth, Kiss her

When she pushes you or hit's you, Grab her and dont let go

When she start's cussing at you, Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet, Ask her what's wrong

When she ignore's you, Give her your attention

When she pull's away, Pull her back

When you see her at her worst, Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying, Just hold her and dont say a word

When you see her walking, Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared, Protect her

When she lay's her head on your shoulder, Tilt her head up and kiss her

When she steal's your favorite hat, Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she tease's you, Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesnt answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay

When she look's at you with doubt, Back yourself up

When she say's that she like's you, she really does more than you could understand

When she grab's at your hands, Hold her's and play with her fingers

When she bump's into you, bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tell's you a secret, keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes, don't look away until she does

When she misses you, she's hurting inside

When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away

When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers

When she repost this bulletin, she wants you to read it

Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.

When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go

When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her

Call her before you sleep and after you wake up

Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

Tease her and let her tease you back

Stay up all night with her when she's sick

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid

Give her the world

Let her wear your clothes

When she's bored and sad, hang out with her

Let her know she's important

Kiss her in the pouring rain

When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's ass am I kicking babe?"


Gotta Love Wal-Mart

Yesterday I was at the local Wal-Mart. Now I was only in there for about 5 minutes and when I came out, there he was - a damn Motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket ...
So, I went to him and said: "Come on Buddy, how about giving a guy a break?"
He simply ignored me and continued writing the ticket.
So, I called him a pencil necked Nazi. He then glared at me and started writing another ticket for having bald tires!
So, I called him a sorry excuse for a human being. He then finished the second ticket and put it on the car with the first. Then he started to write a third ticket!
This went on for about 25 minutes ... the more I abused and hurled insults at him, the more tickets he wrote ...
But hey, I didn't care. My car was parked around the corner ...

This Is the Way It Should Be

"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating student as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, asshole."

I'd Like to See This Happen at My Church

--One day, Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the local church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem: my husband keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing. What should I do?"
--"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at specific times. When I motion, you give him a good poke in the leg."
--In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mrs. Jones.
--"Jesus!" Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the hatpin.
--"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr. Jones nodded off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning towards Mrs. Jones.
--"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.
--"Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long, Mr. Jones had winked off again. However, this time, the minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few motions that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her husband with the hatpin again.
--The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"
--Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "If you stick that goddamned thing in me one more time, I'll break it in half and shove it up your ass!"
--"Amen," replied the congregation

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.


Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this

Even when you can't see Him, GOD IS THERE!! If you believe in God, then put this in your profile.

If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this; because in the Bible, it says that if you deny me, then I shall deny you before my Father in the gates of Heaven.

Guns, Love, and Nuns,

Eve1313

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Texas Juvenille Correction Center by angelinthesky-121 reviews
Three boys meet at the juvenille correction center. Opposites,with only one thing in common. But, could they be friends?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Crime - Chapters: 9 - Words: 11,423 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 2/16/2011 - Published: 10/27/2009
The Changing by H.M.Wolf reviews
Takes place 3 years after The Reckoning. The drama and danger isn't nearly as over as they thought it was. What will happen to Derek and Chloe? What about Rae? Will our favorite supernaturals ever be truly safe? R&R NOW COMPLETED!
Darkest Powers - Rated: T - English - Drama/Supernatural - Chapters: 31 - Words: 38,587 - Reviews: 329 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 8/1/2010 - Published: 4/8/2010 - Chloe S., Derek S. - Complete
Doing It DoggyWhat Now? by browniehaze reviews
Mr. Bae and Aunt Lauren decide to give Derek and Chloe "The Talk", but make a big mistake by having Tori and Simon part of the conversation. Everything goes wrong. Poor Derek... After The Reckoning
Darkest Powers - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,434 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 158 - Follows: 27 - Published: 4/12/2010 - Derek S., Chloe S. - Complete
The Locket by DescendingWolves reviews
Emmett had a twin sister whom he had vowed never to leave. What happened to her when he broke his promise by becoming a vampire? Rated T for later chapters. Mainly Pre Twi then Post BD. Hopefully, it is better than this summary.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 24 - Words: 37,753 - Reviews: 107 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 1/29/2010 - Published: 8/9/2009 - Emmett
A Gangster's Heart by fanpire03 reviews
Edward, Jasper, and Emmett are all rich gangsters in the 1930's. What happens when two rival gangs are after Edward's most prized possession, his wife, Bella. All human. ExB, AxJ, EmxR. PLEASE REVIEW!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Crime/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 13,455 - Reviews: 202 - Favs: 179 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 11/29/2009 - Published: 5/2/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Capturing An Angel by BellaCullenVampirz reviews
Bella is an Angel who tripped and fell from heaven,right into Volterra.Aro gives Bella to Carlisle,who has to keep Bella with him and his family in Forks.Bella has to go to school like a regular kid.what is this attraction between Edward&Bella?AU OOC Cano
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 14 - Words: 18,344 - Reviews: 414 - Favs: 306 - Follows: 317 - Updated: 9/9/2009 - Published: 2/16/2009 - Bella, Edward
All In The Family by TeamAlice21 reviews
The Goddfather Twilight Style. Please R&R. Rated M for later chapters. Included the whole cullen family, and the wolf pack.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Crime/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,239 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/14/2009 - Edward, Bella
Time Passes by love-nicolie reviews
Edward left. Bella became a vampire, but how... A hundred years has pass. Both have come back to Forks. What will happen? Better summary inside. R&R
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,498 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 23 - Published: 11/29/2008 - Bella, Edward
Relearning The Breathing Process by chivalryisntdead reviews
A few days before the wedding Edward is out hunting and Bella agrees to go see Jacob, which she later regrets after he viciously hurts her like she never imagined he would. How will Bella cope? How will everyone react? Rated M for Rape and a few lemons!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 50 - Words: 115,616 - Reviews: 2474 - Favs: 1,177 - Follows: 544 - Updated: 7/22/2008 - Published: 4/8/2008 - Bella - Complete
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Breaking Traditions reviews
There're many shifters in the world, not all change to wolves. Alexandra is the last of a Russian shifter community. With an enemy clan, no one left in her clan, or a mate, she has a hard transformation ahead of her.
Dark Guardian series - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 20,969 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 9/28/2010 - Published: 3/2/2010
Guardian Angel reviews
Alexis's an angel, born on Earth as a human and lived for 16 years. She didn't know she was an angel until after her death. Gabriel, the angel, told her in Heaven. He explained that she was to guard the Quiluete pack and Cullen coven. Full summary inside.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 12,077 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 3/20/2010 - Published: 12/14/2009