Author has written 32 stories for Charmed, Twilight, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Victorious, and Glee.
Favorite TV Shows: (in random order)
House Wives of New York (oh the drama hehe i heart simon but not rele!)
Project Runway (go Christian! Fierce)
Franny the Nanny
What I Like About You
Fresh Prince of Belair (Innnn West Philidelphia born and raised, the playgrounds' where I spent most of my days...gotta love it! I heart Jeffery! He's The Man!)
True Jackson VP...love Oscar
Penguins of Madagascar
Pretty Little Liars
Third Eye Blind
and many many many more...
1. Live Like You're Dying by Kris Allen ( I love this song, the lyrics match up pretty perfectly on how I view life!)
2. Something Beautiful by NeedtoBreathe
3. Who Am I? by Casting Crowns
4. I Am Beautiful
Try saying "Irish Wristwatch" fast
Try saying "Toy Boat" five times fast.
What did the Pink Panther say when he killed an ant? dead ant, dead ant, dead ant dead ant dead ant dead ant dead annnnnnnnnnnnt...
Don't follow me... I'm lost too.
Poke me. I dare you.
Doctors say I have Multiple Personalities. We disagree with that.
It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt... then it's hilarious.
DON'T DRINK WATER: fish have sex in it.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. But if the doctor is cute, feck the fruit.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is Carlisle Cullen, get those apples the hell away from me.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
You can't make a person love you. You can only stalk them and hope for the best.
Come to the dark side. We have cookies.
I know Karate, Kung Fu, and 47 other dangerous words.
A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me. I'm afraid of widths.
YOUR REAL NAME:
YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal)
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (your middle name and street you live on)
YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your middle name).
YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (your 2nd fave color and fave drink)
YOUR ARABIC NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, 1st letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of you mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of your dads middle name, 1st letter letter of a siblings name and last letter of your middle name)
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (Parents middle names)
YOUR GOTH NAME: (black and the name of one of your pets)
10 Commandments of a Teenager
1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
Quick! write down 12 random characters from Percy Jackson and the Olympians!
1) Have you ever read a six/eleven fanfic before?
Annabeth/Rachel- no, can't say I have...would be rather interesting though...
2) Do you think four is hot? How hot?
Ummm...no, sorry, Tyson seems like a great guy and everything w/ a great personality, but no, i doubt he would really be considered "hot" as a Cyclops. Maybe to other Cylcop ladies he might be but otherwise...no.
3) What would happen if twelve and eight started going out?
Luke/Beckendorf...the world might end as we know it. That's a serious good v. evil flaw going on there. Maybe pre-evil luke...nah, prob not. sorry, but Beckendorf was destined to be with Silena.
4) Do you recall any fics about nine?
Hmm. I think I might have read one or two about Grover. I can't really remember. He's in most of them though.
5) Would two and six make a good couple?
Nico/Annabeth..hmmm...maybe. Depends on the story.
6) Five/Nine or five/ten?
Bianca/Grover...eh. no. not really. it'd be an interesting story though. Bianca/Silena...hm. maybe. i might be able to see that. except as I said before, Silena and Beckendorf all the way.
7) What would happen if seven walked in on two and eight kissing?
If Clarisse walked in on Nico and Beckendorf kissing, she would scream "Cream the PUNK!" and kick Nico's butt for hurting Silena. And she would probably beat up Beckendorf for good measure.
8) Make up a summary of a three/ten fanfic.
Percy/Silena...Percy and Silena both lost their loved ones in the war (Annabeth is dead. Sorry) and go to each other for comfort... what happens when the comfort turns out to be a little more than that?
9) Is there any thing as one/eight fluff?
Thalia/Beckendorf... I don't think so.
10) Suggest a title for a seven/twelve hurt/comfort fic?
Clarisse/Luke...hmmm...how bout', "All's Fair in Love and War"?
11) Does anyone on your friends list read three?
Percy...well duh I'd hope so. He's only, like, the main character.
12) Does anyone on your friends list draw or write eleven?
Ummm...Rachel? sure...mayb? not sure how 2 answer this 1.
13) Would anyone on your friends list write two/four/five?
Nico/Tyson/Annabeth...maybe but c answer frm above.
14) What might ten scream at a great moment of passion?
Silena...I don't really know... maybe "Oh no I broke a nail!"
15) If you wrote a songfic about eight, what song would you use?
Beckendorf..."Bob the Builder"
16) If you wrote a one/six/twelve fic, what would the warning be?
Ooo...Thalia/Annabeth/Luke...sweet jesus. I think the warning would b..."beware. Dangerous love triangle. Hurt. Confusion. Death?" I'm not really sure. That's a really good fic.
17) What would be a good pick up line for ten to use on two?
Silena would say to Nico "Would you mind coming and helping me pick out my laurel? I think I'm going to die soon."or something along those lines.
18) 1 and 8 are in a happy relationship until 5 runs off with 9. After 8 dumps 1 for 12, 6 gets upset and retaliates by dating 12. Alone and broken-hearted, 1 travels in search of a friend. Finally, 1 meets 4 and 7. The three loners meet 10, who tells each of them to look for love. 4 finds 3, 7 gets 11, but now 1 is stuck in a never-ending love triangle with 6 and 2!
Thalia and Beckendorf are in a happy relationship until Bianca runs off with Grover. After Beckendorf dumps Thalia for Luke, Annabeth gets upset by dating Luke. Alone and broken-hearted, Thalia travels in search of a friend. Finally, Thalia meets Tyson and clarisse. The three loners meet Silena who tells each of them to look for love. Tyson finds Percy (ew!), Clarisse gets Rachel (um?), but now Thalia is stuck in a never-ending love triangle with Annabeth and Nico.
19) What would be a good title for this?
Hmm...lemme think..Title: "Demigods, Satyrs, Cyclopses, oh My!" OR "It's the circle of love"
20) What would the genre(s) be?
Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their Sweet time:
1. Set all the alarm clocks in house wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
8 Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
12. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say “PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
37 Things to do in an Elevator
1. CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
Heh, I've always wanted to try all of these. I have done numbers 3,4,5, and 7. Kind of entertaining. Yeah. It's cool. Peace dudes.
You know when you live in 2009 when...
1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2.) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years
3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don’t have a screenname or my space
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV
6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) You were too busy nodding and smiling to notice number 5.
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.
11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.
Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did
Did you know...
kissing is healthy.
bananas are good for period pain.
it's good to cry.
chicken soup actually makes you feel better.
94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.
lying is actually unhealthy.
you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.
it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.
89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.
it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.
chocolate will make you feel better.
most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.
a good friend never judges.
a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.
boys aren't worth your tears.
we all love surprises.
Now... make a wish. Wish REALLY hard!! WISH WISH WISH WISH
Your wish has just been recieved. Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and... Your wish will be granted.
If your profile is way too long, copy and paste this into it to make it longer!
Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost.
Friend: Will help me learn to drive.
Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away.
Friend: Will help me up when I fall down.
Friend: Will bail me out of jail.
Friend: Will go to a concert with me.
Friend: Asks me for my number.
Friend: Hides me from the cops.
Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public.
Friends: come and go...
Make new friends
But keep the old
One is silver
And the other's gold
F is for Friends who do stuff together
U is for U and me
N is for aNywhere at any time at all
Right here in the deep blue sea!
If you still play in revolving doors paste this to your profile.
If you ran up a down escalater copy this into your profile
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile
If you've ever had races on those walking sidewalks in airports, copy this on your profile.
If you have ever fallen up the stairs, copy this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile
If you ever forgot your name, copy and paste this into your profile.
Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone.
If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever pushed on a door marked pull or vice versa, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever wanted to kill someone (albeit a man in a purple and green dinosaur suit known as 'Barney the Dinosaur', any sound-nin from Naruto, George Bush, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, or any other fool) then realized murder is illegal then copy and paste this into your profile.
Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back!
If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile
92 percent of American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their asses off at the others.
"I'm bringing sexy back..." copy and paste this into your profile if you didn't even know sexy was gone.
Even when you can’t see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile.
There are three kinds of people: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen, and those who don't know what the heck is happening.
A guy handed a girl 12 roses: 11 real and 1 fake rose. And said he'll love her until every rose dies
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen up the stairs, put this in your profile.
If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If, with no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile...ha! I fainted off a chair backwards once.
Put this in your profile if you know someone who is fighting, has survived, or died of cancer
If you are obsessed with fan fiction copy this into your profile
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile
Put this in your profile if you didn't notice the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.
If you love G-d with your whole heart and are 100 percent proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique; so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal
pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a
rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't
mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer
be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling
was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!
I guess this is cool. If you can read it put it on your profile :)
I called your boyfriend gay, And he hit me with his purse...
Whoever said that nothing is impossible obviously never tried to slam a revolving door!!
If at first you don't succeed do it like your mother told you!
If it's tourist season...why can't we shoot 'em?
What not to say to a police man..."can you hold my beer while I get out my licence?" "I thought you had to be in good shape to be a cop." "You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?"
When a police man asks if you knew how fast you were going don't say, "You should know moron your the one who pulled me over!" but it is okay to think it.
"Ociffer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God"
There are two kinds of Pedestrians in the world; The quick and the dead!!
Right now I'm having Amnesia and Deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before...
I only have PMS on the days that end in the letter 'y'.
They say, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people". Well I think the guns helps. If you stood there and said BANG, I don't think you'd kill many people!!
A friend will help you move a body, a BEST friend would help you move the dead body of your ex-boyfriend to the ditch on the side of the freeway!!
Sarcasm is your bodies natural defense against stupid!
Heaven dosn't want me and Hell's afraid I'll take over!
I finally got my head together and than my body fell apart!
I only do what the voices tell me to do!!
Growing old is mandatory! Growing up is optional!!
One of lifes many mysteries is how a two pound box of candy can make you gain five pounds!!
Marraige is finding the special someone to annoy for the rest of your life!
Lead me not into temptation. I already know the way!!
I don't do perky!
I didn't say it was your fault! I said I was going to blame you!!
I'd tell you to go to Hell but I work there and I don't want to see you everyday!!
My computer beat me at chess however is was no match for me at kickboxing!
There are no stupid questions. Just stupid people!
We could learn alot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty, and some are dull. Some have weird names and all have different colors, but they all hve to be in the same box!
Never underestimate stupid peope in large numbers!
Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks. The first blonde said, "These look like deer tracks." The other said, "No they look like moose tracks,". They argued and argued and were still arguing when the train hit them.
Two men sentance to die in the electic chair on the same day were led to the room in which they would meet their maker. The priest had given them their last rites, the formal speech had been given by the warden, and a final prayer had been said among the participants. The warden, turning to the first man, solemnly asked, "Son, do you have a last request?". To which the man replied, "Yes sir, I do. I love dance music. Could you please play The Macarena for me one last time?".
A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happend to her ears and she answered, " I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear,".
Why did the bee go to the doctor? Because he had hives
Why did the gull fly over the sea? Because if he had flied over the bay, he would've been a bagel
Somtimes You Just Have To Run Awy So You Can See Who Comes After Ya.
Sometimes You Just Have To Talk Quieter Too See Who Listens.
Sometimes You Have To Step Up In A Fight To See Whose Standin By Yor Side.
Sometimes Yo Have To Make Mistakes Only To See Whos There To Help U Fix It.
Sometimes You Got To Let Go Of The One You Love Just To See If They Will Come Back.
7 Things I Hate About Everyone
Actual Consumer Labels:
127 Ways To Know You're A 90's Kid! (well, sort of...) italisized stuff is what i remember...
You know you're a 90's kid when...
1. You can remember saying "talk to the hand"
2. Your best comeback was, "I know you are, but what am I?".
3. If you ever injured yourself on a Slip N Slide
4. Your favorite show was Full House
5. You can finish this song... "In West Philidelphia, born and raised..."
6. You've ever finished a sentence with Psyche!
7. You can remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons
8. You remember when Kurt Cobain, 2Pac, River Phoenix, and Selena died.
9. You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey from "Blossom" and that "How Rude!" comes from Stephanie from "Full House"
10. You begged for some GAK, and when you got that they came out with scented GAK
11. You remember reading "Goosebumps"
12. You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
13. You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence...Not...
14. You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record "Your FAVORITE song of ALL time"...with a tape recorder held up to the radio loL!!
15. Where in the world is Carmen San Diego? was both a game and a TV game show.
16. Captain Planet.
17. You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green Ranger were meant to be together. (this was meant for young 80s children)
18. When playing power rangers with friends you fought over who got to be who...and still all ended up being Tommy.
19. You remember when super nintendo's became popular.
20. You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos... but never taped anything funny.
21. You remember watching home alone 1, 2 , and 3...and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"
22. "I've fallen and I can't get up"
23. You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates
24. Two words... Trapper Keeper.
25. "Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack, all dressed in black, black, black, with silver buttons, buttons, buttons, all down her back, back, back" SHE ASKED HER MOTHER MOTHER MOTHER FOR FIFTY CENTS CENTS CENTS TO SEE THE ELEPHANTS PHANTS PHANTS JUMP OVER THE FENCE THE FENCE THE FENCE
26. You remember boom boxes vs. cd players
27. Writing M.A.S.H. notes.
You remember New Kids on The Block when they were cool
28. You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By The Bell"
29. You played and/or collected "Pogs"
30. You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet or Nano and brought it everywhere
31. You watched the original Care Bears, My Little Pony, and Ninja Turtles
32. Yikes pencils and erasers were the stuff!
33. All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.(pencils.notebooks.binders.etc.)
34. You remember when the new Beanie Babies and talking Elmo were always sold out.
35. You used to wear those stick on earings, not only on your ears, but at the corners of your eyes.
36. You remember a time before the WB.
37. You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
38. You know the Macarena by heart.
39. "Talk to the hand" ... enough said
40. You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"
41. If you played Nintendo 64.
42. used MSN Messenger 2.0
43. If you heard Cindy Crawford sang (in a commercial)... then acted in a movie.
44. If you know "Ice Ice baby" and "Can't touch this".
45. Jean Cluad Van Damn was doing a lot of movies where he played his own twin.
46. Steven Segal was slim and actually have a career.
47. Jennifer Lopez was a dancer for Janet Jackson.
48. If you thought there was no way Michael Jackson could get any weirder!
49. You've seen both fights between the iron Mike Tyson V.S The real deal Holyfield. And the ear bitting.
50. Wear your pants backward.
51. A lot of monkey in Pepsi commercial.
52. MTV single out?
53. Justin Timberlake wanted to be Nick Carter.
54. If you was listening to the O.J verdict.
55. Will Farrell was in Old school.
56. Adam Sander (not famous) was dating Shannon Doherty (famous).
57. Michale Jordan was playing baseball. Then spacejam.
58. Beverly Hill 90210 and Kelly the hot blonde.
59. Christian Slater.
60. Bill Pullman got dump in every movie. Making a career out of that.
61. Pauly Shore, the weasel. Has anyone seen Biodome? I am sorry to hear that.
62. Has Kramer's t-shirt.
63. Know the lyric "I'll be there for you" from the series "Friends".
64. Ace Venture and who was that blonde chic in "The Mask"? Cameron who? Diaz? Cameron Diaz? Never heard of.
65. You knew that Backstreet Boys started the boy band craze!
66. You know the profound meaning of "Wax on, wax off"
67. You have pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.
68. the pharse "finder keepers, losers weepers"
69. You remember when everyone went slinky crazy.
70. You remember when razor scooters were cool.
71. bill-nye the science guy.
72. MR RODGERS!!
74. lamb chop
75. original barney
76. When Toys R Us overuled the mall.
77. act like you didn't watch afro-king BOB ROSS paint trees on T.V.
78. DID I DO THAAAAAAAAAT??
79. when cops and robbers was a daily activity.
80. when we played Hide and go seek until our legs grew numb.
81. when we used to obey our parents
82. when everyhting was settled by: rock paper scissors, bubble gum bubble gum in a dish, ordaddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.
83. You remember watching: The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.
84. You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.
85. You remember those Where's Waldo books.
86. You remember eating Warheads.
87. You remember watching: the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and3 Ninjas movies.
88. You remember Ring Pops.
89. You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.
90. Oh, oh, oh! and JOSTA!!
91. If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"
92. When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.
93. Making those little paper fortune cookie things, and then predicting your life with them.
94. You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.
95. And Windows 95 was the best.
96. You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.
97. Michael Jordan was a king.
98. Lambchop's song never ended.
99. The old dollar bills.
100. Silver dollars, which were cool to have.
101. You remember a time before the WB.
102. You collected all the Troll dolls
103. If you even know what an original walkman is.
104. You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.
105. You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.
106. You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.
107. You've worn shorts and felt stylish
108. You wanted to be part of the Baby-Sitters club
109. You wanted to change your name to "JEM" in kindergarten
110. You sang I Just Can't Wait To Be King and Hakuna Matata in kindergarten
111. You remember Alf, the little brown alien from Melmac and Vicki the Robot from "MY Little Wonder"
112. You used to pretend to be a MIGHTY MORPHIN Power Ranger and you owned a Skip It.
113. You thought it would be so cool to be Alex Mack.
114. You thought Brain woud finally take over the world
115. 2 words ... SPICE GIRLS
116. You can remember dance tunes such as "Mr. Vain"...
117. You remember watching Live and Kicking
118. You read "Shout," "Miss" and occassionally "J17!"
119. You remember that Polaroid cameras = instant pictures.
120. You remember falling asleep early at parties.
121. You would always want to play outside with your friends who lived in your neighborhood .. outside.
122. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock"
123. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head.
124. You thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged handmade friendship bracelets.
125. You owned Pokemon cards but you didn’t play.
126. "Miss Susie had a steam boat, the steam boat had a bell..miss suzie went to heaven the steamboat went to hell_o operator please give me number 9 and if you disnconnect me i'll kick you from behind the fridgerator, there was a piece of glass, miss suzie sat upon it and broke her little ass_k me no more questions, please tell me no more lies the boys are in the bathroom zipping up their flies, are in the cornfield the bees are in their hives ... miss suzie and her boyfriend are kissing in the D-A-R-K- D-A-R-K D-A-R-K dark dark dar dar da dark"
127. Who LOVES orange soda?? Keeeeeeel loves orange soda! Is it truuuuuuuue? Mhm hmm... I do I do I doooooooo...
When we were younger:
Before the MySpace frenzy...
Before the Internet & text messaging...
Before Sidekicks & iPods...
Before MIKE JONES...
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX...
Before Spongebob . . .
...Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.
Man, you didn’t even have homework.
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs & paid 3.50 for a movie.
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off our walkmans.
When 2Pac and Biggie where alive.
When the Chicago Bulls were the best team ever.
When checking out drawing books and that one book about the rainbow fish from the library was THE cool thing to do.
Before we realized all this would eventually disappear
Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!!
Wait Wait...let's not forget OLD NICK shows...Alex Mac, Salute Your Shorts, My Brother and Me, Rocko's Modern Life, the ORIGINAL Rugrats, DOUG!! Cousin Skeeter, Hey Arnold, Clarissa Explains it All, The OLD All That, Pete and Pete yeah the OLD nick days rules
A/N: Okay, so those of you who have read my twilight story "Jacob's Realization: A New Love" be forewarned: I have another story called "Jacob's New Love" which is the exact same story but I had to put it up/change it because it did not appear to be on the website. So sorry if you got confused, but I just had to do it. So please Read/Review and tell me what you think, cause I really enjoy writing it. If you have any questions/confusions, please just either Review, PM me, or Email me. Thanks!
"If you want your life to have some meaning to it, be weird." - my friend Rachel
"Dare to be different"- unknown
Ways to Annoy people at the movie theater:
Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"
Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.
Clap when the good guy gets killed.
During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"
Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!"
Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.
Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.
Yell out what is going to happen.
Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.
Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is.
Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row.
Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are.
Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.
Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.
Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming.
Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...)
Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.
Try to start a wave.
Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first.
Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window.
Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"
Sing with the theme music.
Bring and use your own air freshener.
At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."
Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off.
Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.
Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.
Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!"
Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.
Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen.
Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late.
When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"
Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.
Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?"
Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie.
Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.
Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat"
Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head.
Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.
Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself.
Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle.
Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room.
Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!"
Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!"
Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"
Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can hear it, like when the killer's name is going to be said.
Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones.
Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one.
Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes.
Pass by a room that's showing a movie you've already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the end
Okay, so I'm not a major Harry Potter fan but I like it pretty well and this cracked me up so I just had to put it in my profile! Read on:
25 THINGS (PLUS 1) I MUST NOT DO AT HOGWARTS AGAIN:
1. I will NOT sing “We’re off to see The Wizard” when I am sent to the headmasters office.
2. Dobby is NOT Yoda is disguise.
3. He is NOT Gollum either.
4. I will NOT bring a magic-8-ball to Divination Class.
5. My homework was NOT eaten by a werewolf. Especially when my teacher is Professor Lupin.
6. I will NOT tell the first years to make a tree-house in the Whomping Willow.
7. I will NOT give Lupin a flea collar.
8. Nor will I leave dog-biscuits on his desk.
9. If a classmate falls asleep I will NOT take advantage of this and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.
10. Starting a betting-pool on the fate of this year’s Defence against the Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky. It is NOT a clever money-making concept.
11. I do NOT have a Dalek Patronus.
12. I will NOT teach House-Elves to impersonate Jar-Jar Binks.
13. Shouting “To Infinity and Beyond!” was only funny the first time I took off on a broom.
14. I will NOT refer to the summoning charm (Accio) as “The Force”.
15. “Springtime for Voldemort” is NOT an appropriate title for the school production.
16. I will NOT greet Prof. McGonagall with “What’s new Pussy-cat?”.
17. I will NOT send shampoo to Snape’s office, no matter how badly he needs it.
18. "Potter 6, Voldemort 0" is not a valid T-shirt slogan.
19. Even though they are easier to use and probably more effective, I will not use guns against the Death Eaters.
20. I will not charm Firenze pink and call him "My Little Pony."
21. No matter how funny it is I will NOT leave kitty litter in Prof. McGonagall’s office. (scratch office, leave it on her desk!?)
22. I will NOT dress up as Lord Voldemort for Halloween.
23. I will NOT ask Harry Potter if his “Scar-Senses” are tingling.
24. I will NOT call Dumbledore Santa Claus. Even if it is Christmas.
25. I will NOT tell Voldemort to “Get a life”.
26.I will NOT tell Draco Malfoy to 'make like a ferret and bounce'
Mental Hospital Phone Menu:
Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital!
Please select from the following options menu:
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.
If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.
If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you.
If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.
If you are blond, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.
Things I'm NOT Allowed to do at camp Halfblood: (thought of and published by TasteTheRainbow32)
1. I will not hug Mr. D., nor will I come into personal contact with him, whatsoever.
2. Telling campers ‘save a Pegasus ride a demi-god’ is not funny, just very dirty.
3. Telling campers ‘save a demi-god, ride a centaur’ is not permitted, and Chiron will most likely kill me.
4. Singing “Like a Virgin” in front of the hunters is not funny, no matter how many people laugh.
5. I will not give Luke a hug, no matter how much he needs one.
6. I will not sing “Hey Hade’s, you’re so Fine”, ever.
7. Referring to Mr. D. as the drunken fat guy is not permitted, and will also get me turned into a grape.
8. I will not braid Chiron’s tail and call him my pretty pony.
9. I will not ask Chiron for boxers or briefs, because he obviously doesn’t wear underwear.
10. I will not point out the fact that Chiron doesn’t wear underwear.
11. I will not ask Chiron if horses do it better.
12. I will not sing “You and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals, so let’s do it like they do it on Discovery Channel” to Chiron.
13. Calling Kronos a meanie-but will get me killed, and isn’t a smart idea.
14. Grover does not need to shave his legs, and I will stop saying so.
15. Juniper is not cheating on Grover with all the tree huggers at camp.
16. I will not tell Annabeth that Percy hates blondes with a fiery passion from the bottom of his heart. It’s just plain mean.
17. The goods are not bimbos or jingaloes.
18. Calling the gods sexy beasts might make them feel better, but is not permitted.
19. I will not yell out that Kronos is coming and watch every one freak out.
20. I will not tell the Aphrodite girls that Clarisse says she’s prettier than them.
21. I will not aim for the satyrs during archery.
22. I will not make pot brownies and sell them to the campers, because an A.D.H.D. kid on marijuana is just a mess.
23. Singing the Mission Impossible theme song for every quest I go on just gets annoying.
24. Correcting Annabeth is a bad idea.
25. Dumping glitter on Mr. D. and taping a note to his back that says ‘I feel pretty’, then blaming it on Percy is not permitted.
26. Telling all the gods their attack and defense points is annoying.
27. I will not dress up as a hellhound for Halloween and run around jumping on every one.
28. I will not make fun of Artemis because she looks twelve.
29. I will not steal Percy’s Minotaur horn, tape it to my forehead, and run around saying I’m a unicorn.
30. I will not start dancing on the table in the dining hall singing “La Vie Boehme” from Rent.
31. Using Annabeth’s invisible Yankee cap to give people wedgies is not permitted.
32. Travis and Cole are not ‘butt-buddies’.
33. Making enemies with the gods is a bad idea, even if it is fun.
34. Asking Rachael what the answers to the SAT are is cheating, and not permitted.
35. I will not give energy drinks to any of the campers.
36. I will not feed Grover my enemies’ clothes.
37. Percy’s nickname is not Shark Boy.
38. Despite Annabeth’s temper, her nickname is not Lava Girl.
39. Singing “Strawberry Fields Forever” in the strawberry patches gets annoying after a while.
40. I will not jump on Chiron and yell ‘Giddy up!’
Added on by me, charmedbabyp5:
41. I will not sing "it's the eye of the tiger" in front of Mr. D. he's got leopard skin, right? or maybe cheetha? not sure...
42. I will not play "King of the mountain" on top of the lava rock climb.
43. It is not cool to sing "the itsy bitsy spider" in front of Annabeth. Nor is it cool to put a fake spider in her hair. Even if it is April Fool's day.
(1) A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I'm gonna make you the happiest woman alive." the woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
(3) Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for
(4) Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
"An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctors cute, screw the fruit"
I am NOT saying your stupid...I'm just implying it.
Best friends through thick and thin!
What happens once you meet your "Prince Charming"? Life will suddenly be easy? I don't think so!! Guys are complements NOT completions!
Boys are like slinkeys. Completely useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Yes, I hit like a girl. You could too if you hit a bit harder.
Remember: Some people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them
You call me a bitch? A bitch is a dog, a dog barks, bark is on a tree, trees are part of nature and all nature is beautiful. So thanks for the complement!
Men are like a deck of cars: you need a heart to love them, a diamond to marry them, a club to beat them, and a spade to bury the bastard.
I'm not insane... i just do whatever the voices tell me to.
I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Your just jealous because the voices only talk to me...hehehehe...
If you don't like me then remember, its mind over matter: i dont mind and you don't matter
they say true love hides behind every corner: i must be walking in circles!
People like you are the reason we have middle fingers
When life gives you lemons throw them at the mean people and hope it gets them in the eyes
Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them as much
i couldn't repair your brakes so i made your horn louder
Someday we'll look back at this and plow into a parked car
If the sky is the limit, then what is space?
whoever said nothing's impossible, obviously never tried slamming a revolving door!
if olive oil comes from olive's then where does baby oil come from?
if quitters never win, and winners never quit, how can it be good to 'quit while your ahead?'
Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?
Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?
Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa beans, and all beans are a veggie?
Why do people say, "You can't have your cake and eat it too"? Why would someone get cake if they can't eat it?
Roses are red,
STRESS: A condition brought on by over-riding the bodies natural desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
I got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
I used to be indecisive, now I'm not sure.
It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn.
WARNING: DO NOT follow in my footsteps...I tend to walk into walls and off the occasional cliff.
If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on.
Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.
Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.
A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."
When in doubt, push random buttons!
You wanna know why God created man before woman? Every masterpiece needs a rough draft!
There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.
They say guns don't kill people; people do. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled 'BANG!' I don't think you'd kill many people...
Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking
An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.
They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.
Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?
A clear conscience is usually a sign of memory loss.
There are no stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots.
The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.
They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?
Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to.
Some say the glass is half full, some say it's half empty, I say, "Seriously? It's just a glass of water!"
All people have the right to stupidity but some people abuse the privilege.
The trouble with life, is there's no background music.
A clean house is a sign of a broken computer!
But boys are like wine; They need to have the mess kicked out of them and be left to mature for a while before they become something you are able to have a meal with.
Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.
FAVORITE QUOTES('cause I'm a quote fanatic):
"The existence of monsters results in monstrous consequences"- Edward Cullen-Eclipse
"Oh, a sadistic vampire, intent on torturing her to death, no problem, she runs off to meet him. An IV on the other hand..." -Edward Cullen-Twilight
"Of all the things about me that could frighten you, you worry about my driving."
"I've decided that as long as I was going to Hell, I might as well do it thoroughly."
"And So the lion fell in love with the lamb."
"I made the cowardly lion look like the terminator." -Bella-Twilight
“I refuse to be affected by territorial disputes between mythical creatures.” -Bella Swan-Twilight
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