diabolical-scholar
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
beta: β Beta Profile
Joined 05-21-09, id: 1942602, Profile Updated: 04-20-13
Author has written 4 stories for Percy Jackson and the Olympians, and iCarly.

College was pretty damn annoying. People did warn me, but damn if I didn't ignore them. Oh well, at least I'm graduating in a bit.

So. Who am I? Well, I'm an 21 year old Chicano college senior. I'm barely surviving as it is since a) I'm a horrible procrastinator and b) I have no money for food. Additionally, my classes are doing their hardest to slowly kill me. I set up my schedule so that I wouldn't be comatose in class, but that didn't stop half my professors from being more aggravating than cats in heat.

Some Random Crap About Yours Truly:

1) I don't do text speak. Ever. Why? I found a better way to corrupt the English language. Spanglish.

2) I wouldn't do anything for a Klondike bar. Now, if we were talking tamales...well...murder's not off the table.

3) I have four sisters. No brothers. Yeah.

4) I like Frank Sinatra, Seether, Eminem and (sometimes) Kanye West, but hate Justin Beiber and Lady Gaga.

5) I drink water and Mountain Dew. Mostly water.

6) My best friend is the only guy who can make me gag in disgust and horror. He calls that Monday. I call him Bastard.

7) My life philosophy is: live and let live, until you piss me off. Then I find you.

8) My favorite shows are Bones, Supernatural, Burn Notice, White Collar and Castle. And yes, reality shows suck. A lot.

9) My decision making process is ridiculously simple. It consists of one sole question. "Why not?"

10) Terry Goodkind is amazing. Jim Butcher is awesome. Rick Riordan is inspired. Their novels damn near got me to become an English major, but my love for Psychology manages to prevail again and again.

That's enough for now...


Or not...

It's slightly embarrassing, but I have become oddly fond of iCarly. I just can't explain it. After seeing the second half of an episode (iKiss) I got interested, and have been reading some fanfics and well now I'm going to write one in hopes of getting it out of my system.


I stole this from azngirl1123.

The Stupidest Things On Products

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Too late!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (As night follows day . . .)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope.)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I gotta admit, I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash.)

On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". (So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon.)

On a Myer hairdryer:"Do not use while sleeping."(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."(Wow. That's really helpful)

On a child's superman costume:"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly". (Awh, that's the whole purpose of buying the costume!)

On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals".(Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions:"Put on fork and eat."(No! Really? We're supposed to eat food?!)

On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how??)

On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But, it's just a suggestion).

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Fowl Shorts by Kitsune Heart reviews
A collection of humorous stories covering: the use of lotion, violent Holly, hormone-addled Artemis, swear toads, fairy cuisine, public singing, memes, sexy dancing, sports cars, innuendo, female "purity," rockstar anatomy, babysitting, gods, and romance.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 839 - Reviews: 394 - Favs: 247 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 10/30/2013 - Published: 5/16/2009 - Holly S., Artemis F. - Complete
but hear it this way by sparklespaz716 reviews
'...yeah, Nate's definitely in her head.'
NCIS: Los Angeles - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,075 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 9 - Published: 4/11/2012 - Eric B., Nell J. - Complete
7 by Enchantable reviews
In between 5.16 and 5.17, on his bender, Castiel finds a list of seven deadly sins that he's been carrying around. Drunk, he decides to experience them all--with a little help from a familiar demon.
Supernatural - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,211 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 11/13/2011 - Published: 4/11/2010 - Meg, Castiel - Complete
After the Storm by Trmptgrl47 reviews
She was right; he thought ironically; the blood on the front her sweater wasn't hers. However, the red that was blossoming on the left side of her body certainly was.
Castle - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 20 - Words: 38,864 - Reviews: 583 - Favs: 240 - Follows: 274 - Updated: 3/29/2011 - Published: 2/16/2011 - Rick C., Kate B. - Complete
My Spitfire by Asche Angel 46 reviews
Just a quick oneshot in which Wally finally confesses to Artemis. Cause really, we all see it coming and the spitfire pairing is just plain awesome ; Please enjoy.
Young Justice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,658 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 3/23/2011 - Published: 3/19/2011 - Artemis C./Artemis, Wally W./Kid Flash - Complete
Favorite Movies and Sweet Dreams by LJConnelly reviews
After a high-stakes case and almost dying twice, even the toughest heros need some comfort. Set immediately after the end of Countdown. Rated T for use of alcohol.
Castle - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,517 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 12 - Published: 3/3/2011 - Kate B., Rick C. - Complete
A Sparrow's Fall by Jeitiiea reviews
The Angels lay siege to the Gates of Hell and Castiel meets the righteous man.
Supernatural - Rated: K - English - Spiritual/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,385 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/21/2010 - Castiel, Dean W. - Complete
Still and Always, McGee by Malvolia reviews
Sometimes you have to give something up to safeguard something you want more. A series of one-shot missing McGee and Abby moments, starting with their break-up.
NCIS - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 40 - Words: 31,798 - Reviews: 273 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 96 - Updated: 10/17/2010 - Published: 6/29/2009 - Tim M., Abby S.
A Gross of Bones by Thnx4theGum reviews
Lots of little oneshots that deal with all of our favorite Bones characters. Will include B/B and H/A pairings, lots of fluff, and a little angst thrown in for good measure.
Bones - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 27 - Words: 19,940 - Reviews: 102 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 2/9/2010 - Published: 7/18/2009
Drottningu by DefineNormalitee reviews
RE-DONE. After the fight at Feinster, Arya discovers she has feelings for Eragon. However, competition can come at you from all sides...
Inheritance Cycle - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 25 - Words: 33,039 - Reviews: 407 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 1/7/2010 - Published: 3/27/2009 - Eragon S., Arya - Complete
Who are you? 7 weeks by puuurpleprincess95 reviews
Sweets finally gets some answers. Characters POV.
Bones - Rated: K - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,133 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/1/2010 - Published: 9/10/2009 - T. Brennan, L. Sweets
Search To New Life by singstar microphone reviews
Abby is just an ordinary school girl, with a good life. but when her family are killed in an explosion, her life is destroyed. She becomes rebelious. She then get's sent to Ireland to fix her behaviour. Will Artemis Fowl cure her? or break her further?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 23,013 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 12/10/2009 - Published: 10/4/2008
Seen In A Certain Light by Lli reviews
After an extraordinary event, can one return to an ordinary life? Holly, at least, is determined to try. And, needless to say, everyone pitches in to help - regardless of whether or not she wants them to.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 114,699 - Reviews: 450 - Favs: 339 - Follows: 106 - Updated: 9/8/2009 - Published: 5/7/2009 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
I'm Alive by Wamzwrites reviews
A look into Brennan's thoughts after the close of "Wannabe in the Weeds" with slight change in history... What if Brennan had learned the truth? Brennan's POV. One-shot. B&B.
Bones - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,028 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/29/2009 - S. Booth, T. Brennan - Complete
Conversations in the Diner by NewEstonia reviews
Booth and Bones hear things about themselves. Contains SPOILERS!
Bones - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,931 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 11 - Published: 8/11/2009 - S. Booth, T. Brennan - Complete
Some Rules Are Better Left Unbroken by the.brown.eyed.girl reviews
Artemis Fowl did not like rules. In fact, he was of the general opinion that they should be flaunted, glossed over or completely ignored. So what happens when Kris makes him a long list of them? Artemis/OC
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,498 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 6 - Published: 7/7/2009 - Artemis F. - Complete
Alpha Female Tendencies by Manda517 reviews
All the eligible males at the Jeffersonian, including Booth, are being auctioned off as dates in a bachelor auction. Booth accuses Brennan of being an 'Alpha Female' around him, and she finally decides to embrace the label.
Bones - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 32 - Words: 35,497 - Reviews: 491 - Favs: 205 - Follows: 164 - Updated: 6/26/2009 - Published: 6/10/2009 - Complete
Mills and Fowl by hobbitsdoitbetter reviews
Artemis is suffering from problems with a certain delicate project and asks for Juliet's input. Of course, given that this is Juliet, he gets more than he bargained for... Violet Tsirbleu is about to start earning her keep...One shot, Post Book 6
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,077 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/8/2009 - Artemis F., Juliet B. - Complete
Remembering a Friend by kittiekat10105 reviews
The "Special Scene" in TLO from Clarrise's POV. First PJO story, so be kind. Clarrise, is kinda OOC. Not good with her charecter yet.
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,115 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/7/2009 - Annabeth C., Percy J. - Complete
Yellow by Gun toten Girly reviews
-Oneshot- For a person of your magnitude, it was impossible to believe you could be taken down so easily. And by what? A sickness? I refused to believe it. But even so, for years on end, I slowly lost my hope. Humans were fragile creatures, after all.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,447 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/1/2009 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
The Pledge by BiteMarks reviews
Beth comes to a realisation, and makes Mick a promise. Set in the early days of their romance.
Moonlight - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,009 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/31/2009 - Mick S. J., Beth T. - Complete
Joker by Moonlite Knight reviews
In which there are siblings, blackmail, and punching. Sometimes it’s best not to think too much, but in this case, thinking was one thing Holly should definitely have done.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,618 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 6 - Published: 4/26/2009 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
His Wyrda by EmeraldArya reviews
Set after Eldest in Ellesmera, this is the story of Eragon and Arya's struggling relationship as the war rages on around them. Eventually Eragon/Arya. Rated M for violence/ torture scenes and a lemon or two.
Inheritance Cycle - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 11 - Words: 35,673 - Reviews: 713 - Favs: 706 - Follows: 186 - Updated: 9/8/2008 - Published: 8/14/2008 - Eragon S., Arya - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

iSit in the back seat reviews
Freddie reunites with his best friends after his first semester in college. Everything is right on the drive to Bushwell Plaza: he fights with Sam, & Carly tries to stop them. But life will always throw curve balls at random times. How will Freddie deal?
iCarly - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,650 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 6/17/2011 - Published: 12/16/2009 - Sam P., Freddie B.
Wedding Crashers reviews
Continuation of Birthday Surprise. It's Percy's wedding day and he's nervous. Will he be calm enough by sunset?
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,074 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 11/18/2009 - Published: 6/12/2009 - Percy J., Annabeth C. - Complete
Birthday Suprise reviews
Three years after the Titan War, Percy turns nineteen. He gets a surprise visit from dad during his suprise party, and a generous gift. Then he surprises Annabeth Read and review. Rated T just to be safe.
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,135 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 5/29/2009 - Published: 5/23/2009 - Complete
Reunited reviews
Percabeth. Before LO. What SHOULD have happened. One shot. Read and review, but be gentle, it's my first time. Don't own PJO.
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,558 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 7 - Published: 5/23/2009 - Annabeth C., Percy J. - Complete