Author has written 5 stories for Twilight, and Doctor Who.
hey everyone, hope youre going well.
I'm currently looking for a story to beta, if you want me to beta a story for you, please pm me.
I just uploaded a crappy trailer for Bella Black and if you want to check it out, heres the link - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwFi6jPep0s
Now for copy and paste time
If your parent are getting worried because the only thing you are doing is reading Twilight, c&p this tp your profile
If you have ever seen a movie (or TV show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, and do so at random moments when rewatching it, copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever cried when your favorite character in a book, movie, or TV show died, copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever wondered what it was like in another dimension, copy this onto your profile.
If you think the human identification thing when you log onto fan fiction is annoying, copy this onto your profile.
If you have read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste onto your own profile, then do so and copy this into your profile.
If you like David Tennant more than Orlando Bloom, copy this into your profile.
If you actually take the time to read other people's profiles, copy this onto your own.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you said it, copy this onto your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this onto your profile.
If you have a tendency to talk to yourself, copy this onto your profile.
If you're guilty of sometimes using a British accent, even if you're not British, copy this onto your profile.
If the Tenth Doctor makes you laugh because he's so random and funny, copy this onto your profile. ("If there are pilot fish, that means...why's there an apple is my dressing gown?")
If you are one of the wise ones that knew Rose would return, copy this onto your profile.
If you absolutely refuse to have GPS or any computerised street directory in your car, especially if the letters A, T, M, O, or S are in the name, copy this onto your profile.
If you believe that Doctor Who is the Greatest Show in the Galaxy, copy this onto your profile.
If you understand the above reference, copy this onto your profile.
If you have a very wide range of interests, copy this onto your profile.
If you have inside jokes...with yourself...then copy this onto your profile.
Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
If you have ever said something that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy this onto your profile.
If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to slap yourself/someone else, copy this onto your profile.
If you really like to quote things, copy this onto your profile.
If you talk back to the TV (often quite loudly), copy this into your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile.
If there are times when you've felt like annoying people for just the heck of it, copy this onto your profile.
If you're quiet a lot but also REALLY loud at times, copy this onto your profile.
Do you know that the average American reads only three books a year? If you believe that it's not possible to read so little, copy this onto your profile.
If you own at least one Doctor Who DVD set, copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever wondered who made up all these copy and paste things, copy this onto your profile.
If you secretly hope that you will one day see the TARDIS parked somewhere, copy this onto your profile.
If you know it is a crime to write any of the following: Tardis, tardis, trds, tARDIS, then quickly copy this onto your profile.
If you get way too excited about certain books/movies/TV show episodes coming out, copy this onto your profile.
If you think that life is useless without computers, copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever wished that you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy this onto your profile.
If every time that a political candidate shows an ad on TV, you absentmindedly start drumming the Master's theme on whatever surface you can find, copy this onto your profile.
If you can now answer historical questions thanks to Doctor Who, copy this onto your profile.
If fan fiction is to you what MySpace is to other people, copy this onto your profile.
1F YOU C4N UND3R574ND 7H15 M355463, COPY 4ND P4573 17 1N70 YOUR PROF1L3.
If you like to quote Doctor Who at unexpected times and grin to yourself when no one realizes, copy this onto your profile.
If you have an odd love/hate relationship with your computer, copy this onto your profile.
If you're one of those people who get really excited when they get a new review, copy this onto your profile.
For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russian
I German so I MUST be a Nazi
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue. (mary-sue are based on prettier verisons of the authors (most of the time) all my fan characters are blonde and I'm a brunette)
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I an friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON"T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I supported Senator McCain, so i MUST be racist and against change
These are actual instruction labels from certain consumer goods...
On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to fix my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(And that would be...how?)
On some Swann TV dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But that's just a suggestion, of course)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert:
(printed on bottom of box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late; you lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Seriously? Let's experiment!)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save time?)
On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
Do not drive or operate machinery.
(We could really do a lot to reduce construction accidents if we would keep the 5-year-olds off the fork lifts)
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness.
(One can only hope)
On Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.
(Hmmm, something must have gotten lost in the translation...)
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(Yeah, as opposed to using it in outer space)
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm really curious)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts.
(But no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.
(I wonder who thought that one up)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this)
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable flight.
(Oh, go ahead! That's right, destroying a universal childhood belief!)
On a hose nozzle:
Do not spray into electrical outlet.
(Thanks for the little word of advice!)
On a container of salt:
Warning: High in sodium.
(Really? I don’t believe it…)
On a box of Frosted Cheerios:
The logo, "Tastes so good this box never closes," is located just underneath another announcement: "To close: place tab here."
(Funny how that worked out)
On Woolite carpet cleaner:
Safe for carpets, too!
(That’s good to know, seeing as it’s carpet cleaner!)
On a package of microwave popcorn, which is packaged so that the directions cannot be read unless you open the plastic and unfold it:
Direction #1: Remove plastic.
(Thanks, I never would have figured that one out!)
On a box of household nails:
CAUTION! - Do NOT swallow nails! May cause irritation!
On a bottle of bathtub cleaner:
For best results, start with clean bathtub before use.
(Says a lot about their product, huh?)
Instructions on the bottom of a grocery store pizza:
Do not turn upside down.
On the bottom of a Coca-Cola bottle:
Do not open here.
(Thanks for the little tip)
On a pack of furniture wipes:
Do not use for a baby wipe.
(I pity the poor kid whose parents didn’t read the instructions)
Onthe package of a VCR box:
Instructional video on hooking up VCR included.
On a box of pills:
Take one capsule by mouth three times daily until gone.
(Thanks for the advice)
On the instructions of the packaging for a muffin at a 7-11:
Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert muffin, eat.
(Really? Never would have thought of that!)
On a can of black pepper.
Instructions: usage unknown.
On a bag of cat biscuits:
Simply pour the biscuits into a bowl and allow the cat to eat when it wants.
(Only one thing to say to this one: LOL!)
On a car manual:
In order to get out of car, open door, get out, lock doors, and then close doors.
(Just in case you haven’t a brain cell in your head… O.o)
On a Laundromat triple washer:
No small children.
(Only large children, huh?)
Small print from a car commercial which shows a vehicle "body-surfing" at a concert:
Always drive on roads. Not on people.
(Whew! What a relief!)
Small print from car commercial which shows a car in the ocean:
Do not drive cars in ocean.
(Darn! That’s just what I was about to do! :P)
Ona manual for an SGI computer:
Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at coworkers.
(I really wonder who makes these things up…)
On a sign at a railroad station:
Beware! To touch these wires is instant death.
Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.
(But how can you be prosecuted if you’re…oh, never mind)
On a dashboard of a mail truck:
Look before driving.
(But how am I supposed to read if I’m looking?)
On a bottle of rat poison:
Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice.
(Somehow, I don’t really think the mice have to worry about cancer)
On a portable stroller:
Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage.
(But if you just leave the baby in it, you’ll be all ready to go next time!)
On a can of air freshener:
For use by trained personnel only.
(Must be pretty dangerous stuff…)
On a label for a heated seat cushion
Warning: Do not use on eyes.
(But that’s what everyone’s doing these days!)
On a microwave oven:
Do not use for drying pets.
(I wonder why not?)
On an Aim-n-Flame fireplace lighter:
Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks.
(Then I’m afraid that I don’t really see the point of it…)
On a bottle of shampoo for dogs:
Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.
(But everyone knows that fish just love eating dog shampoo)
On a package of Fisherman's Friend throat lozenges:
Not meant as substitute for human companionship.
(But throat lozenges make such good friends!)
On a package of disposable razors:
Do not use this product during an earthquake.
(Somehow, I highly doubt anyone would be shaking during an earthquake)
On a bottle of New Zealand insect spray:
This product not tested on animals.
(Then how do we even know it works?)
On a blanket from Taiwan:
Not to be used as protection from a tornado.
(-whines- Why not?)
On a cardboard windshield sun shade:
Warning: Do Not Drive With Sun Shield in Place.
(I can just see that happening…)
On an infant's bathtub:
Do not throw baby out with bath water.
(Thanks for the helpful advice)
On hotel- provided shower cap in a box:
Fits one head.
(And what about my other head?)
On the box of a 500-piece puzzle:
Some assembly required.
On Silk Soy Milk:
Shake well and buy often.
On a air conditioner:
Caution: Avoid dropping air conditioners out of windows.
(Look out below!)
On a road sign:
Cemetery Road. Dead End.
(Interesting choice of words, there)
On a mattress:
Warning: Do not attempt to swallow.
(Now this I’d like to see!)
On a pack of matches:
Caution: Contents may catch fire.
(One can only hope)
On a package of earplugs:
These ear plugs are nontoxic, but may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe.
(From what I’ve heard, most things caught in your windpipe usually have that effect)
On a Komatsu Floodlight:
This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark.
(Really? No way)
On a box of hair coloring:
Do not use as an ice cream topping.
On a bottle of baby oil:
Keep away from children.
On a bag of Arm & Hammer Scoopable Cat Litter:
Safe to use around pets.
(That's a relief)
Pictures for Bella Black: The untold story
The wolf pack
(Bella in wolf form)
(Jody in her form)