BereniceSnape
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 05-27-09, id: 1948805, Profile Updated: 12-28-14
Author has written 6 stories for Harry Potter, Fallout, and Death Note.

I'm Lisa. I'm 21. I deleted most of my stories cuz they were crap. I like Mass Effect and a lot of other video games. I especially like some porn of my favorite video games. Hence the fanfiction. Yep. Otome games are life.

For gods sake if you read my fanfiction and can't tell it's a joke i have no idea what to say to you. I was pretty sure my phrasing would give it away, but apparently not. if you are reading this: I DO NOT PUBLISH SERIOUS FANFICTION EVERYTHING I WRITE IS PARODY (AND USUALLY MAKING FUN OF THE LESS THAN STELLAR WRITING IN CERTAIN FANDOMS).

I don't write anything serious that is fanfiction. The only serious writing I do is brief and unprofessional (i.e. no format and no spell check and no publisher obviously) commentary regarding social inequalities and mini rants about my family and questionable content in otome games on tumblr. If you are interested in following me message me and ask me about it. If the fact that I am pro-black and pro-choice pro-lgbtqa rights (which goes way beyond gay marriage) and essentially pro-everything that conservative white people hate then don't bother messaging me at all; you don't want to see my tumblr and I don't want to talk to you.

Another note would be if you think I am making fun of gay people with my Death Note fanfiction I am not. What I am making fun of is the very badly written gay erotica straight girls who have no idea how gay sex works and also fetishize gay people which is not okay (people are not fetishes and it's disrespectful to fetishize someone for their race, gender identity, sexuality, physical or mental disabilities, etc).

If you want to message me to discuss social issues I would love that. I don't foresee it happening because that's not really the purpose of this site, but I would enjoy it none the less.

Thanks if you read all this.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Inquisitor's Ghost by nothelping reviews
She met him in the dungeons of the White Spire. She was the only one who could see him, remember him. Five years later, and Cole was back in her life, appearing out of thin air, just like the ghostly apparition he was, tempting her with something she could never have. Because every mage knew: Never take a demon into your soul. You'll change yourself forever.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 19 - Words: 130,747 - Reviews: 212 - Favs: 190 - Follows: 249 - Updated: 5/24 - Published: 11/11/2014 - Inquisitor, Cole
I Was Lost Without You by sirens call universe reviews
They had always gravitated toward each. Two opposite poles moving together to become one. Adrianne and Cullen. Mage. Templar. She went from friend to enemy to lover over the course of their lives.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 41 - Words: 70,443 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 5/17 - Published: 1/18 - Cullen, OC
Contact by Demonic-Kit reviews
AU Shepard was on the ship that had the first contact, and now weak and injured she finds herself at the mercy of a strange creature that seems to want to help her, but those teeth say differently. Meanwhile Nihlus wonders what exactly he has gotten himself into with this strange new species.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 23 - Words: 120,093 - Reviews: 171 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 247 - Updated: 5/13 - Published: 5/10/2013 - [Shepard (F), Nihlus K.]
Field Training by Mordinette reviews
Spectre training was easy. Putting up with her turian teammate during their group lessons was less so. AU story with Shepard, Garrus, Jondum Bau, and as many characters from the Mass Effect universe as I can fit in. Romance/Humor/Adventure.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 65,552 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 126 - Follows: 202 - Updated: 5/11 - Published: 3/7/2014 - [Shepard (F), Garrus V.] Jondum Bau
Books by Angelada reviews
"Have you read all the books here?" /"Hermaeus Mora is the patron of information and memory, the keeper of knowledge in its entirety. Apocrypha is an endless library, I have spent lifetimes here!"- Miraak was going to find out just how serious The Dragonborn was about books. And just how far she was willing to go for those that captured her interest.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 55,144 - Reviews: 135 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 137 - Updated: 4/1 - Published: 10/23/2013 - Dragonborn/Dovahkiin, Miraak
Embracing the Gift by orangepenguin86 reviews
In the aftermath of the battle for Solitude the Breton Dragonborn questions her choices. FDragonbornXUlfric and also eventual DragonbornxVilkas
Elder Scroll series - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 29 - Words: 109,175 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 76 - Follows: 117 - Updated: 3/23 - Published: 12/13/2011 - Dragonborn/Dovahkiin, Vilkas, Ulfric Stormcloak
A Reason to Affiliate by Analya-Shepard reviews
After what the Council has dubbed "The Geth War" on the Citadel, and the Collector attacks in the Terminus Systems, Commander Emma Shepard takes on a task that no one else believes in: tracking down an old Spectre to answer for his crimes. Mild language, AU, spoilers, and some Shepard/Garrus that changes to Shepard/Saren. Sequel here: /s/11208703/1/To-Persevere
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 55 - Words: 134,549 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 3/22 - Published: 12/29/2013 - Shepard (F), Garrus V., Saren A. - Complete
Break Free by ithilbereth reviews
Princess Lothíriel of Dol Amroth has been protected by her three well-meaning bothers and doting yet austere father all of her life. Yet with the tide of the Ring War rising, her thirst for adventure is ravenous, and Lothíriel decides to take matters into her own hands. She finds herself entangled in a whirlwind of passion that is nearly overshadowed by the many hardships of war.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 37 - Words: 218,556 - Reviews: 163 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 3/21 - Published: 8/15/2014 - Eomer, Lothíriel - Complete
Refuge by SirArthurNudge reviews
Executor Pallin has no love of humanity but he eventually makes an exception - set in ME1 and ME2 (and maybe ME3 eventually.)
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 49 - Words: 60,893 - Reviews: 133 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 140 - Updated: 3/17 - Published: 6/7/2013 - Executor Pallin, Garrus V., Illusive Man, Shepard (F)
From Eden by Mythal Rising reviews
Isala is a young dalish elf who wanders the Emerald Graves after she was cut loose from her clan, her mage blood making her an unwanted risk. The Emerald Graves are beautiful but deadly, and she thinks it's almost fitting that she should meet an elf such as Abelas within these sacred forests. Abelas/OC. Smut achieved.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 19,700 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 3/4 - Published: 1/10 - [OC, Abelas]
Genesis by squigglysquid reviews
Part two of the Parable series. Covers the events of ME 1 with the premise that Jane Shepard and Garrus Vakarian were married before the events of Eden Prime. Skips most of the mission briefs to focus on Character Development. I do not own the claim to any of these characters. They are the product of Bioware.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 57 - Words: 224,436 - Reviews: 116 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 127 - Updated: 2/17 - Published: 11/27/2014 - Shepard (F), Garrus V. - Complete
Into the Eye of the Storm by KMD88 reviews
Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., Hayden Waltham is known for her knowledge in Norse Mythology. After helping to save Asgard, Hayden returned to Earth with a new mission revolving around Arthurian legends back to Merlin himself. With rumors that Loki is back on Earth, Hayden must chose between chasing the storm or to wait for the calm that every storm brings. LokixOC. Sequel. Rated M.
Crossover - Avengers & Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 17 - Words: 116,240 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 181 - Updated: 8/10/2014 - Published: 10/15/2013 - [Loki, OC] G. Ward, Skye/Daisy
Ante Up by GreenMamba5 reviews
With his family aboard the Normandy, Garrus finds it difficult to keep his relationship with Shepard a secret. Currently undergoing for editing. Expect changes in chapters and content!
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 195,026 - Reviews: 768 - Favs: 920 - Follows: 1,159 - Updated: 8/3/2014 - Published: 1/30/2012 - Garrus V., Shepard (F)
Why Detective, You Shouldn't Have! by LibraMoon reviews
Shepard just wanted to drink the rejection away. Until Detective Chellick asked for her help. It wasn't supposed to be like this! Fem/ShepxGarrus Jealous Garrus, and mentions of onesided Garrus/Tali
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 63,290 - Reviews: 317 - Favs: 413 - Follows: 542 - Updated: 7/22/2014 - Published: 7/19/2011 - Shepard (F), Garrus V.
Lean on me by Simplysheree reviews
Set in a universe where Shepard is not the first human spectre, or even a soldier and follows her journey from victim to Commander. After being found on Eden Prime by Commander Kaiden Alenko she is sent to citadel as a victim in the case against Saren. Garrus Vakarian is assigned as her Victim support officer and together they join forces with Spectre Alenko to fight Saren.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 41 - Words: 85,752 - Reviews: 92 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 6/18/2014 - Published: 3/15/2013 - Shepard (F), Garrus V. - Complete
Back in the Black Bayou by The Konfessionist reviews
A search mission takes a terrifying turn for Emmy and Charon in Point Lookout, but offers Charon an opportunity he never believed to be possible. The catch? In order to obtain this golden opportunity, he will have to do the unthinkable.
Fallout - Rated: M - English - Angst/Horror - Chapters: 3 - Words: 27,505 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 11/17/2013 - Published: 3/20/2012 - Lone Wanderer, Charon - Complete
Fly By Night by LockNRoll reviews
She cuts loose her life with the Reds and finds a new home in the Alliance as an elite agent with a terrifying reputation. One man sees through it all, and at last she understands what it is to have something you're afraid to lose. ME1-3, F!Shenko.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 35 - Words: 372,568 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 125 - Follows: 131 - Updated: 8/16/2013 - Published: 5/17/2012 - Shepard (F), Kaidan A.
Heuristics by kauzchen reviews
Time is a luxury in the thick of war, and what is sown must always be reaped. As one of only two people alive who can speak the prothean language, Shepard is given the task to learn more about Javik's civilization while she is still able.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 50,386 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 236 - Follows: 284 - Updated: 6/10/2013 - Published: 5/27/2012 - Javik, Shepard (F)
Weightless by RaptorAssassin reviews
A wise Krogan once said that the only stories worth telling are those of love, sex, and war. This has all three. A story of provocateurs, confidants, and unhealthy attraction. Mass Effect Noir. Rated MA. Original content and a touch of AU pre & post ME1-3 concerning the secrets, origins, and lives of Jane Shepard and Garrus Vakarian.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 152,021 - Reviews: 312 - Favs: 197 - Follows: 244 - Updated: 4/10/2013 - Published: 5/27/2012 - Garrus V., Shepard (F)
Just Like Old Times by That'sNotMe reviews
Post ME3: Shepard breaks the Reapers' indoctrination, and makes it back to Garrus alive. But what is in store for two heroes who are not content to stop the fight for justice? M for language and occasional interspecies "relations."
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 67,071 - Reviews: 109 - Favs: 178 - Follows: 258 - Updated: 12/21/2012 - Published: 3/22/2012 - Shepard (F), Garrus V.
Amity in the Stars by Sprightly Grey reviews
Amity in the Stars follows the characters and their building relationships that take place during ME2 and post collector base, leading up to ME3. Ellure Shepard struggles with her past and present as she marches ahead, fighting to be the commander everyone expects her to be. Along the way, she discovers an old friend who shares her scars, knows the risk, and loves her anyways.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 45 - Words: 198,284 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 12/12/2012 - Published: 4/16/2012 - Shepard (F), Garrus V. - Complete
The Milk Drinker's Revenge by Lady NeverAfterNon reviews
The Dovahkiin has picked the wrong pocket, the Stormcloaks are trying for total Skyrim domination, and there's wheat being mysteriously pillaged. It's enough to give Lydia a headache. R/R, please!
Elder Scroll series - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 13,961 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 12/5/2012 - Published: 2/1/2012 - Dragonborn/Dovahkiin, Farkas
Pygmalion by Zerbinetta reviews
How is a pesky Fade spirit to solve the dilemma of who should be the Warden in its novelization of the story of the latest Blight? Why, by letting pre-Ostagar Alistair choose his own love interest by meeting them all, of course!
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 22,895 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 11/23/2012 - Published: 4/28/2010 - Alistair
An Apostate? Me? by Sarah1281 reviews
Emma Hawke has never been the most subtle or sane of apostates, much to the annoyance of the brother that can only watch in amazement and horror as she stumbles her way from refugee to noble to champion in a city as bizarre as she. Eventual AndersXHawke.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 44 - Words: 135,221 - Reviews: 306 - Favs: 218 - Follows: 149 - Updated: 11/1/2012 - Published: 3/26/2011 - Hawke (F), Carver H. - Complete
Twilight in a Nutshell by Mits reviews
Parody summary of the Twilight Series.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,400 - Reviews: 288 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 9/18/2012 - Published: 12/7/2008 - Complete
Skin and Bone by artistic mishap reviews
During the course of her trial, all Shepard's skeletons come tumbling out of the closet. James doesn't quite know how to deal with the revelation that one of his heroes is actually human - or that he might actually like her better this way.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 13 - Words: 47,471 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 8/6/2012 - Published: 6/27/2012 - Shepard (F), James V.
Galaxy's Unlikeliest Hero by BountyHuntress16 reviews
Sequel to Galaxy's Oldest Profession. She survived Omega's Merc gangs. Now, former hooker Shepard strives to determine her place on the Normandy, in Garrus' life and in a galaxy that needs saving.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 30,469 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 134 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 7/6/2012 - Published: 6/12/2012 - Garrus V., Shepard (F) - Complete
Infinite Regress by jhoom reviews
As Shepard reaches the end of her life, she finds herself suddenly thrown back on Eden Prime. Will she use what she knows to change the future, or try to preserve the timeline? Kink meme fill. Rating for sex and language.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 22,437 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 154 - Follows: 219 - Updated: 6/28/2012 - Published: 11/30/2011 - Shepard (F), Garrus V.
Sue Effect by Ridley the Violator reviews
J@n shepherd haz bean alone all her lief-butt naow seh fnds lvvvr in oonexpacted plorces.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,705 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/13/2012 - Shepard (F), Nihlus K.
Affinity by artistic mishap reviews
After Garrus tells Shepard of his thwarted artistic inclinations, she shares a secret talent.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - Spanish - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,496 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/3/2012 - Shepard (F), Garrus V. - Complete
Drift by artistic mishap reviews
While trying to board the Geth ship, Shepard discovers that even though the lies keep tumbling from her lips, she's really not fine.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,987 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/1/2012 - Shepard (F), Garrus V. - Complete
Sanguine's Influence by L. Century reviews
A complimentary story for The Wrong Husband. Will NOT make sense without reading the first five chapters of The Wong Husband. Csatari may not remember what happened in those five lost days, but Vilkas certainly does. HEAVY on the M rating!
Elder Scroll series - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,473 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 5/12/2012 - Published: 3/10/2012 - Dragonborn/Dovahkiin, Vilkas
Can I change your mind by timbertimbre reviews
Things around Shepard always did tend to get worse before they started to improve. 'Purgatory', where the night had started; a state of momentary suffering. How appropriate, The universe certainly had a sense of humour, Joker'd give it that.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 14,481 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 5/12/2012 - Published: 4/27/2012 - Joker, Shepard (F)
The Pink Ending by Semerket reviews
The key to defeating the reapers is not quite what Shepard expected. A crack!fix-it ending.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,630 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 6 - Published: 4/21/2012 - Shepard (F), Harbinger - Complete
The TRUE Mass Effect 3 Ending: The Sex Change by NoThaTerrible reviews
Faced with three crappy choices to end the Reaper threat, Shepard opted for another option. He chose the impossible. He chose…a sex change.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,713 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 5 - Published: 4/18/2012 - Shepard (F), Kaidan A. - Complete
Darkness Rises When Silence Dies by Heiwako reviews
Not sure what to do with herself after defeating Alduin, the Dragonborn gets drawn into the Dark Brotherhood. Follows DB story line after completion of Main.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 61,090 - Reviews: 138 - Favs: 257 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 4/2/2012 - Published: 3/19/2012 - Cicero V., Dragonborn/Dovahkiin - Complete
Knight's Bloom by R2s Muse reviews
Thrust into new roles as the leaders of Kirkwall, Viscountess Marian Hawke and Knight-Commander Cullen become close allies and fast friends. But Hawke struggles to keep their relationship professional in the face of unexpected new dangers as the Chantry tightens its grip on Kirkwall and a mysterious assassin dogs her steps. Set between DA2 Act 3 and Varric's interrogation.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 124,477 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 160 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 1/28/2012 - Published: 11/6/2011 - Hawke (F), Cullen - Complete
How The Dam Was Won by SpyVsTailor reviews
A silly oneshot inspired by the dancing mod for NV. Rated M for language. Mmmm CRACKtastic!
Fallout - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 586 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 8/23/2011 - Complete
Saving Ferelden's Rather Large Bum by xXSaberXx reviews
F!Amell has some things to say about her life.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 17,499 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 5/14/2011 - Published: 2/17/2011 - Alistair, Amell
What I Found in a Warden by Josie Lange reviews
Korrine Hawke answers Delilah Howe's urgent request to enter the Deep Roads to find her brother. When Korrine arrives, she finds that Nathaniel was not the only Ferelden Warden in the Deep Roads. Response to a Cheeky Monkeys challenge and k!meme request.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,766 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/13/2011 - Loghain M. T., Hawke (F) - Complete
Afterwards by Lilith Morgana reviews
They have each other perfectly measured. Fenris/Hawke.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,405 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 9 - Published: 3/31/2011 - Hawke (F), Fenris - Complete
And on the Seventh Day He Sqyubbed by Sqyub reviews
Satan was displeased with Adam and Even's plain, vanilla sex. How were they supposed to horrify and sicken the Lord if he didn't invent kink?
Bible - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 742 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/24/2011 - Adam, Eve - Complete
I Rather Think the Gun Helps by Xela Xe reviews
"Now let me get this straight," Mal said, staring at the humming object suspiciously. "We're going to steal the Lassiter...before the Lassiter became the Lassiter." Because nothing could go wrong if the crew of Serenity started dabbling in time travel.
Crossover - Firefly & Psych - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,097 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/25/2010 - Carlton L. - Complete
Is that a Pistol in your Pocket? by NotSrsBsns reviews
No story. No plot. Who said saving the world had to be a serious venture? A series of one-shots that have nothing to do with each other. Collaborative fic.
Fable - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 50 - Words: 11,311 - Reviews: 161 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 10/26/2010 - Published: 3/22/2010 - Sparrow/The Hero of Bowerstone
The Letter J by beexfeatheryduster reviews
After breaking up with her latest boyfriend Sarah finally accepts the truth of her feelings for our dearest Jareth - M for one word, just to be on the mega safe side
Labyrinth - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,247 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 10/6/2010 - Published: 8/15/2010 - Sarah, Jareth - Complete
Magic Fic by Taste the Doom reviews
Jareth discovers fanfiction... and sings about it! Loving parody of 'Magic Dance', with added Jareth/Sarah.
Labyrinth - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 528 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/18/2010 - Jareth, Sarah - Complete
In Front of the College one shot by Yesterday's Tonic reviews
The twice rejected Goblin King returns to cajole 'his' Sarah into returning. It turns out to be an interesting encounter, since she isn't the young girl he first had run on his merry little chase. M for language
Labyrinth - Rated: M - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 993 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/5/2010 - Sarah, Jareth - Complete
Back at Camp by Angel sai reviews
Alistair confronts Surana about the events at Redcliff and the dear mage lets him know EXACTLY how she feels about it. updated
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,496 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Updated: 6/30/2010 - Published: 5/3/2010 - Surana, Alistair - Complete
Wait, You Already Knew? by Sarah1281 reviews
Poor Alistair has been worrying for weeks on how to break the news to Angélique that he's the son of King Maric...only to find out that not only was she well aware of this fact but she didn't even realize it was supposed to be a secret.
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,482 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/30/2010 - Alistair, Amell - Complete
Goddess Worship by Vema reviews
Zevran/Wynne. Very sexy, but some people might consider it a little squicky because of the pairing. Thanks for reading!
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,266 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/29/2010 - Zevran A., Wynne - Complete
Coffee, Jareth, Coffee! by Sylistra the scholar reviews
Edited for grammar. Thanks for the reviews everyone! Rated M for safety, and slight insanity.
Labyrinth - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,207 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 6/25/2010 - Published: 6/14/2009 - Sarah, Jareth - Complete
You Remind Me Of The Bulge by MoonageDaydream23 reviews
Jareth's crotch is alive, Sarah's an idiot, and Jim Henson loves his chickens waaaaay too much. All par for the course in one of my parodies!
Labyrinth - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,195 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/25/2010 - Complete
I Quit the Blight by Sarah1281 reviews
When Alistair told Ahria Tabris that being a Grey Warden meant that she wouldn't get pregnant, she believed him. She shouldn't have. Now she's stuck in the middle of a Blight with a child on the way and has to take herself out of the fight...
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,009 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 8 - Published: 6/23/2010 - Tabris, Zevran A. - Complete
Running From Romance by LittleBlueNayru reviews
Link is running from unwanted love. Whose affections is he trying to escape? Oh, just those of EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER IN THE ENTIRE SERIES! Completely insane. Run if you're scared. RHO; Random Humorous Oneshot.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Romance/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,732 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/11/2010 - Link - Complete
What Comes Next by Piceron reviews
Starts 6 weeks after the Archdemon is slain by Elandria, with everyone believing her dead. Spans the next 3-4 years as Alistair is left to deal with kingship and a new queen. Elandria learns to live with her actions during the Blight and without Alistair.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 32 - Words: 127,986 - Reviews: 238 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 5/27/2010 - Published: 3/10/2010 - Alistair, Surana - Complete
No Porn, No Love by Youkai Of Hearts reviews
There is only one way to dampen Loghain Mac Tir's army when they are out after the Grey Wardens...Slight OOC
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,868 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 5/26/2010 - Surana, Alistair - Complete
Conquests and Roses by OrdinaryStory reviews
In the years since Sarah left, Jareth's broken heart has changed him.
Labyrinth - Rated: M - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 684 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/20/2010 - Jareth - Complete
Take Me Into Your Ark by RoboCop Jane reviews
Wild times in the old testament! A true stroke of genius from The Cop. Rated M... no, seriously.
Bible - Rated: M - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 897 - Reviews: 218 - Favs: 146 - Follows: 14 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Jesus, Noah - Complete
They Can’t All Be Warden Material by Sarah1281 reviews
Angélique Amell, shallow, self-centered, and rather oblivious though she is, still had no business being so shocked to find out that the ever-stuttering Cullen liked her, at least if you ask an exasperated Alistair and the ancient Wynne.
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,595 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 5 - Published: 5/4/2010 - Amell, Cullen - Complete
Just End It Already! by Sarah1281 reviews
Alistair valiantly attempts to save Reidin Aeducan's life by taking the final blow atop Fort Drakon, unaware of Morrigan's dark ritual. Unfortunately, attempting to explain the situation may allow for someone completely unworthy to steal the glory...
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,560 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/29/2010 - Aeducan, Alistair - Complete
At Least You Avenged Some Ancient Ashes by Sarah1281 reviews
After Wynne and Leliana slay Alistair and the Warden for defiling Andraste's ashes, Morrigan is forced to explain to them that they've just doomed Ferelden and not even to SAVE the ashes. But how were they supposed to know? Warning: character death.
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,863 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 12 - Published: 4/27/2010 - Morrigan, Wynne - Complete
Oh Well, They Deserved It Anyway by Sarah1281 reviews
Laiarda Mahariel is eager to use her new status as Grey Warden to right the wrongs of her past...just sometimes she gets a little confused as to who exactly she, personally, needs to seek vengeance on. At least they were all horrible people, right?
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,441 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/23/2010 - Mahariel, R. Howe - Complete
But Good Luck With That by Sarah1281 reviews
Caunira Surana's heard Jowan's mad plan to escape from the Tower...and she wants nothing to do with it. She's been a Mage for two hours and already he wants her to risk Aeonar? Some friend he turned out to be. But still, she hopes it works out for him.
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,450 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/22/2010 - Surana, Jowan - Complete
When Morality Comes into Play by seeleyboothfan reviews
Takes place during Awakenings. What happens when in game characters start to question moral decisions that the gamer themselves could question? Like, why does no one yell at you for stealing their things from right in front of them?
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 839 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Published: 4/18/2010 - Cousland - Complete
Of Pets and Exiles by Sarah1281 reviews
Aunn Aeducan knows the importance of connecting with new companions, but when her efforts to talk about pets with Anders makes him run away, she decides to bond about being exiled with the angriest member of the group...
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,035 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/15/2010 - Aeducan, Velanna - Complete
The Price of Salvation by Knightfall1138 reviews
The Warden and his companions make camp for the night, only to find Levi Dryden patiently awaiting them. He has a big exclamation point over his head and a mood-killing request. Written by Knightfall and Mister Buch.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Parody/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,648 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Published: 4/13/2010 - Complete
PRINCE: The Owner's guide and Maintenance Manual by The Ultimate Person reviews
Thank you for purchasing the PRINCE unit, SoT editon. To insure the safty of the planet earth and it's sanity, please read this manual for instruction.
Prince of Persia - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,199 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/20/2010 - Complete
Breaking up with a Guy You’re Not Even Dating by Sarah1281 reviews
While marrying off Alistair to Anora, the Queen asks if Aunn will be a factor in their marriage and, upon finding out she won't, requests she lets Alistair know. Despite the fact they're not dating, Aunn agrees. She never said she'd do it the easy way...
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,145 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/18/2010 - Aeducan, Anora - Complete
Short One Male Warden by Sarah1281 reviews
Loghain doesn't survive the Joining and Alistair goes back to his fellow Warden to try and rejoin the team, claiming he was wrong about how morally bankrupt she was. Of course, she insists she's just that bad and would he mind sleeping with Morrigan?
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,026 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/9/2010 - Aeducan, Alistair - Complete
There's Something There Or Not by Sarah1281 reviews
After confronting Wynne on her troubling tattling tendencies when Morrigan used blood magic to help save the Circle, Aunn Aeducan gets an unwelcome lecture on relationships she's not even in.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,244 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/2/2010 - Aeducan, Wynne - Complete
Where’s A Disney Death When You Need One? by Sarah1281 reviews
Riordan survived his assault on the Archdemon and so did the other Grey Wardens. Now, he's quite eager to hear how the Blight was stopped without a sacrifice and the other three Wardens are just as eager to completely avoid the subject...
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,148 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 6 - Published: 2/23/2010 - Aeducan, Alistair - Complete
Don’t Blame Me, It’s Tradition by Sarah1281 reviews
After an unsatisfying meeting with Goldanna, Lady Aeducan shares her experiences with her family and being a noble and Alistair quickly realizes that the only way for him to stay sane is to find some way to make Anora be Queen instead...
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,374 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/16/2010 - Aeducan, Alistair - Complete
The Real Fellowship by Knight Thunder reviews
A Fellowship of nine set out from Rivendell... Loads of cross-overs! FINISHED. Check out sequel "The Real Towers"!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 18 - Words: 9,249 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 5 - Updated: 2/14/2010 - Published: 11/5/2009 - Aragorn, Gandalf - Complete
Now You’re Just Inventing Problems by Sarah1281 reviews
As a Cousland, Anastasia is MORE than noble enough to become Queen and yet Alistair is still muttering some nonsense about duty whenever he's not complaining he doesn't want to be King. Looks like she's going to have to force his hand at the Landsmeet...
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,289 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 7 - Published: 2/9/2010 - Cousland, Alistair - Complete
Wonderment is a Dangerous Thing by Soulhost reviews
During camp, Caelor has a wonderment...that ends up rotting her companions minds.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 696 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 10 - Published: 1/24/2010 - Mahariel - Complete
Dreaming Hell by thisRANDOMperson reviews
One-shot. Sweeney reaches the afterlife, but with the horrors that ensue, he can only hope it's a nightmare. R&R.
Sweeney Todd - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,435 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 9 - Published: 8/24/2009 - Sweeney T., Lucy B. - Complete
Pirelli by thisRANDOMperson reviews
Parody. Neither Sweeney nor Anthony sing of their dearest Johanna. I wrote this when I was thirteen, alright? Also: Obama fans may or may not be offended, depending on his/her sense of humor. R&R.
Sweeney Todd - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,705 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 15 - Published: 8/10/2009 - Sweeney T., Anthony H. - Complete
She Will Be Missed by Ageon reviews
My older brother does not know how to divorce in Fable, he decided to be a widower. Really, in hind sight, having more than 1 wife was not the smartest idea. Rated for decapitation
Fable - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 206 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 13 - Published: 7/12/2009 - Chicken Chaser/The Hero of Oakvale - Complete
No Place like Texas by thisRANDOMperson reviews
Parody. If Sweeney were a Texan, how different would his arrival be from that of London? R&R.
Sweeney Todd - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,012 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/26/2009 - Complete
Everyday Lives of Albion's Heroes by TheNuttyAuthor reviews
What the Heroes of Albion do when they aren't specifically being Heroic. Slight AU.
Fable - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,467 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 5/17/2009 - Published: 2/11/2009 - Complete
Call on me, Saruman! Call on! by BakaProductions reviews
What J.R.R Tolkien found too stupid to put into the books. Legolas spins the saddle twice before putting it on the horse.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,031 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Published: 4/18/2009 - Complete
PlayBird by Peridot Tears reviews
Companion to SPECIAL INTERVIEW: LIVE. The owls of Ga'Hoole are going to starr in PlayBird! Their demented tormentor hath returned! What will happen to the poor little dild-- Ahem, never mind 8DDDD Crack. One-shot.
Guardians of Ga'Hoole - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,377 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 5 - Published: 4/9/2009 - Complete
The Milkberry Cafe by ezyl reviews
The Milkberry Cafe closes down as a signature and farewell to the owl who died in the hole. Goodbye, folks. I hope you enjoyed joking around with Playbird issues as much as I did... RATED M.
Guardians of Ga'Hoole - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,977 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 3/18/2009 - Published: 2/21/2008 - Complete
Six Years, Six Applicants by Sarah1281 reviews
Chronicling Dumbledore's never-ending and sometimes desperate attempts to fill the Defense Against the Dark Arts postion with anyone but Snape and Snape's persistent attempts to land the job anyway.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 11,536 - Reviews: 281 - Favs: 881 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 1/19/2009 - Published: 1/5/2009 - Albus D., Severus S. - Complete
No Thank You by Sarah1281 reviews
What if the Dursley family had taken the more practical route of treating Harry kindly in order to keep him away from magic? What if it worked? What if he wants nothing to do with the wizarding world and Dumbledore has to solve his own problems for once?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,608 - Reviews: 304 - Favs: 1,356 - Follows: 235 - Published: 11/22/2008 - Harry P., Albus D. - Complete
Isn't it obvious? by Sarah1281 reviews
After another Chamber of Secrets incident, Myrtle takes it upon herself to explain to her Potions class exactly what has been attacking everybody. Unfortunately, it's Potions with Slytherin.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,038 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 284 - Follows: 43 - Published: 4/30/2008 - Myrtle, Tom R. Jr. - Complete
The Legend of Zelda: The Map of Love by UnknownUntitled reviews
Link has not been to Clocktown in over seven years, and he is excited to see his secret lover. Maybe he finally has the chance express his feelings....crack LinkxTingle fan fiction
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 723 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/11/2007 - Link, Tingle - Complete
The Red Heir of Slytherin by Sarah1281 reviews
Ron and Hermione's trip to the Chamber of Secrets, where Ron gets over his inferiority complex and Hermione discovers that anyone can speak Parseltongue if they're unobservant enough.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,950 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 326 - Follows: 52 - Published: 9/8/2007 - Ron W., Hermione G. - Complete
Mudblood by Sarah1281 reviews
"Mudblood? Is that your idea of an insult or something?" Draco attempts to explain to Hermione why she should be offended.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,021 - Reviews: 201 - Favs: 979 - Follows: 144 - Published: 9/7/2007 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
The Legend of Tingle by EternalFlare reviews
A short parody of the Legend of Zelda, featuring Sauron, Darth Vader, and everyone's favourite person, Tingle!
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,007 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 6 - Published: 5/16/2007 - Tingle, Link - Complete
A Previously Untold Story Until Just Now by Elf Asato reviews
The SHAM saga continues with Sheik x Mailbox and Ganondorf x Hoover. Sheik tells a story that was previously untold until just now.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 307 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Published: 9/19/2006 - Sheik, Ganondorf - Complete
Woof Woof! Get Along, Little Triforce by Elf Asato reviews
[SHAM] Link and Sheik talk about the Triforce.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,085 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/10/2006 - Link, Sheik - Complete
How Hogwarts Became a Nudist Colony by Slinky-and-the-BloodyWands reviews
Harry Potter arrives at school to find the students nude. Where are their clothes? Why are the Houses getting along better? What does Hermione and Snape have to do with the nudity? Well, read it and find out! Hints of HrGSS, but mostly just nudity.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 16,558 - Reviews: 350 - Favs: 315 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 5/3/2006 - Published: 12/19/2004 - Hermione G., Severus S. - Complete
What Goes Around Comes Around by Elf Asato reviews
The latest installment in the SHAM series... Link, Sheik, and Nabooru gossip about Ganondorf's lovelife.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 408 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Published: 6/1/2005 - Ganondorf, Sheik - Complete
Hyrule by Elf Asato reviews
[Drabble] Ganondorf loves the beautiful Hyrule.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 185 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Published: 4/11/2005 - Ganondorf - Complete
The Big Day by Elf Asato reviews
A continuation of the SheikMailbox SHAM series! Sheik and his mailbox finally tie the knot... Vague references to LinkMasterSword and ZeldaWashingMachine.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 650 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 14 - Published: 8/13/2004 - Sheik, Link - Complete
The Tragic Tale of Link and Mr Pointy by Elf Asato reviews
LinkMaster Sword smuttishness. 'Nuff said. Vaguely related to Sheik and the Mailbox.
Legend of Zelda - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,191 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/17/2004 - Link, Sheik - Complete
Sheik and the Mailbox by Elf Asato reviews
A short drabble, but full of SheikMailbox goodness
Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 550 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/8/2004 - Sheik - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Heat It Up reviews
Light pleasures himself thinking about Ryuzaki.
Death Note - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 666 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/1 - Light Y., L - Complete
A Very Birthday Sequel reboot
Light and L have established a relationship and L's birthday is on the horizon. What kind of sexy birthday surprise will Light have for our favorite detective ;)?
Death Note - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 879 - Published: 4/1 - [L, Light Y.] Soichiro Y., Matsuda T.
A Very Birthday Sequel
L and Light have established their relationship and things are going well. L's birthday is coming up and Light wants it to be the best birthday he' ever experienced. L/Light M/M YAOI YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED
Death Note - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 786 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/28/2014 - [L, Light Y.] Soichiro Y., Matsuda T.
The Sweetest Night reviews
L makes Light's first time beautiful.
Death Note - Rated: M - English - Spiritual/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,356 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/2/2014 - [L, Light Y.] - Complete
Romance In Mojave reviews
Edited for spelling mistakes; added author's note. I don't even know. Prompt from a conversation: "Yes, Boone's relentlessly fucking the back panel and causing it to rapidly change channels as he does so." "M!Courier/wilted carrot."
Fallout - Rated: M - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 506 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/12/2012 - C. Boone, Vulpes Inculta - Complete
Love Knows No State reviews
Severus Snape finds his true love. Not DH compliant. A response to Wotcher-Tonks' "Never Before Seen Pairing" challenge.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 426 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Published: 6/3/2009 - Albus D., Severus S. - Complete