Author has written 3 stories for My Babysitter's a Vampire.
Just a bunch of stuff that I like to read and copied from other people O_o :D
If you can read this you are blessed because more than two billion people can't read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!
If you could read that put it in your profile!
Why do we sleep in church,
but stay awake through a 2 hour movie?
Why is it so hard to talk about God,
but so easy to Gossip?
Why are we so bored when we look at a Christian magazine,
but find it so easy to read Sports Illustrated?
Why is it so easy to ignore a Godly Facebook wall post,
yet we repost the nasty ones?
Why are the amount of churches getting smaller,
but bar and club numbers growing?
Think about it, are you going to repost this?
Are you going to ignore it, because you think you'll get laughed at?
Would you have opened this if it said... Read This In Gods Name?
80 % of you won't repost this.
They pushed her
Carmen Winstead was pushed down a sewer opening by 5 girls trying to embarrass her in front of her school during a fire drill.
When she didn't submerge the police was called.
They went down and brought up 17 year old Carmen Winstead's body, her neck broken from hitting the ladder, and then the side cement at the bottom.
The girls told them she fell...
They believed them.
2 months ago David Gregory read this post and didn't repost it.
When he went to take a shower he heard laughter from his shower, he started freaking out and ran to his computer to repost it.
He said good night to his mom and went to bed.
5 hours later his mom woke up cause a loud noise.
David was gone.
That morning a few hours later the police found him in the sewer with his neck broken and his face skin peeled off.
Even Google her name you'll find this to be true.
If you don't repost this saying "They pushed her"
Then Carmen will get you either from a sewer, the toilet, the shower or when you go to sleep, you'll wake up in the sewer in the dark the Carmen will come for you.
PLEASE REPOST THIS!
FRIENDS: Lend you their umbrella
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
FRIENDS: Are temporary
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when the guy rejects you
FRIENDS:hides you from the cops.
FRIENDS:will go to a concert with you.
FRIENDS:will help you up when you fall.
FRIENDS:will try to get rid of a brain freeze for you.
FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
Man: Have I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes thats why I don't go there anymore
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes and this one will be if you sit down
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.
Man: Hey baby, whats your sign?
Woman: Do not enter
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you
Woman: But would you stay there?
All the good ones are either gay, married, taken, or anime characters.
I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on.
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
DO NOT HIT KIDS!! No, seriously. They have guns now.
Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them more.
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.
If you don't like me, there is nothing I can do. Here's a newsflash Honey, I don't live to please you!
We're best friends. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You laugh, I laugh. You jump off a bridge, I laugh harder and call out before you die, "WAIT, CAN I HAVE YOUR iPOD?!."
Men are like pennies: two-faced and worthless.
Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.
When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.
If all else fails, try reading the instructions.
One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is to stubborn to ask directions.
Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
When life gives you lemons make orange juice and stand back and watch as the world wonders how you did it.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.
Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.
The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on.
Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas.
Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.
Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."
You wanna know why God created man before woman? Every masterpiece needs a rough draft!
There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.
An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.
Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.
We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police.
Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to.
Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.
All people have the right to stupidity but some people abuse the privilege.
1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you.
The trouble with life, is there's no background music.
A clean house is a sign of a broken computer!
I've learned from my mistakes, and I'm sure I could repeat them exactly.
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
Your misery=My joy.
The question should never be why. It should always be why not.
When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it, but it takes only 4 muscles to punch them.
Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe.
The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.
When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
Some say the glass is half full, some say the glass is half empty. I say “Are you gonna drink that?”
The light you see at the end of the tunnel is the headlight of a fast approaching train.
War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
You can't make somebody love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope for the best!
Growing older is manditory. Growing up is Optional
I've heard that its possible to grow up. I've just never met anyone who's actually done it.
Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
Sometimes you make me so mad I wanna throw you in the middle of ongoing traffic, but then I realise I would probably kill myself trying to save you.
Remember: Some people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't going as ghosts but as mattresses?
If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him... Is he still wrong?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? And is it suicide or murder?
Is there another word for synonym?
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
Dream as if you’ll live forever… Live as if you die today.'
'Don't get mad; get sadistic.'
'Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?'
Common sense is the enemy of comedy.'
'Knowledge is power; power is the root of all evil. Therefore studying must be evil.'
'I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it!'
Boys don't fall for me; I trip them.'
'There are very few problems that can not be solved using a large amount of explosives.'
'I write for the same reason I breathe; if I didn't I would die'
'I used to have super powers but my therapist took them away.'
'It is not enough to succeed; others must fail.'
Guns don't kill people. Bullets Do.
'You know what! Earth sucks, I’m going home.'
'If you laugh I will laugh. If you cry I will cry and if you jump out a window I will laugh.'
'Why don't you slip into something more comfortable; like a coma?'
'What is this 'kindness' you speak of?'
It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt. Then it's even funnier!
'Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you keep on talking.'
Did you know...
9) Saying you're a gangster doesn't really mean your a gangster.
10) Being a nerd may make you unpopular in high school, but in the future you can order Chicken McNuggets from the popular kidRoses are red,
11) 10 percent of people will leave this alone.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile
15 Things to do when your in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone," 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. (HAHA!)
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..."NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!
15. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"
A black man walked into a bar and sat beside a white man. The white man said, "Coloured people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me coloured?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... If you hate racism then copy and paste this to your profile.
If olive oil comes from olive's then where does baby oil come from?
Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it becomes extra tempting to eat?
Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?
Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable but not on regular television? Don't they want the people without cable to buy the cable?
Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?" Coincedence? I think not!
What happens if you put this side up face down while popping microwave popcorn?
Why is chopsticks one of the easiest songs to play on the piano, but the hardest thing to eat with? I cherish the day I can go to a Chinese Restuarant and actualy be able to eat my food. The rest goes on the floor T_T
It IS as bad as you think and they ARE out to get you.
If you ever went to get something, then got into the room and forgot why you were in there, copy this into your profile!
If you hate Hannah Montana, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever listened to a song over and over again until your friends were forced to hijack the stereo, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever accidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you have ever said something and two seconds later, completely forgot, copy and paste this to your profile
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile
If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever read a 250 pg + book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever tripped over air, copy and paste this into your profile
If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get like two reviews, copy this into your profile.
If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible, it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book.
I am the girl that people look through when I say something.
I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal.
I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face.
I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone.
I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year.
I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain.
BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with anime, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things.
Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone
Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.
Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world?
I ran with scissors and lived!
I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.
a day without sunshine...is...well...night...
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
I’m not afraid of death what’s he gonna do kill me?
When you want to insult someone, walk a mile in their shoes. so when you insult them, you’re a mile away and have their shoes!
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adam
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.
Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.
"Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together."
The road to success is always under construction.
Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee getting bigger?" Then it hits me.
Being mature is overrated.
A girl went to a party and
she ended up staying longer than she
planned, and had to walk home alone.
She wasn't afraid
because it was a small town and she lived
only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm
trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from
harm and danger.
When she reached the alley, which was a
short cut to her house, she decided to take it.
However, halfway down the alley she
noticed a man standing at the end as
though he were waiting for her.
She became uneasy and began to pray,
asking for God's protection.
Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness
and security wrapped round her, she felt as
though someone was walking with her.
when she reached the end of the alley,
she walked right past the man and arrived
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been killed and
raped in the same alley just
twenty minutes after she had been there.
Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and
the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep.
Thanking the Lord for her safety and to
help this young woman, she decided to go to the
She felt she could recognize the man,
so she told them her story.
The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him.
She agreed and immediately pointed out
When the man was told he had been
identified, he immediately broke down and confessed
The officer thanked Diane for her bravery
and asked if there was anything they could do
for her She asked if they would ask the man one question.
Diane was curious as to why he had not
attacked her When the policeman asked him, he answered, Because she wasn't alone.
She had two tall men walking on either side of her.
Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone.
Did you know that 97 of teenagers will not stand up for God?
Paste this if you really, truly believe
IMPORTANT THINGS MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME!
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
19. My mother taught me ESP.
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
Things to do on an Elevator
CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
SAY 'DING' at each floor.
SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
SWAT at flies that don't exist.
CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.
I love the pairing of Ethan and Benny, it's just so adorable!!! So, if you don't like that pairing, then you probably won't like my story so...I suggest you don't read it if you don't like it. :D
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