Murder-City
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Joined 06-15-09, id: 1970670, Profile Updated: 07-18-09

My name is Murder City, obviously.
I still, most miserably so, remain as a student as of now, and am a debater and dancer. I have a penchant for reading and writing, so passages riddled with flaws appear to be extremely repulsive to me.

I flame with abundance, and specialise in composing critiques for authors on Fanfiction, and if you choose to grouse or whine inanely with regards what I have offered you, then I suppose you need to grow up and learn to take your errors in stride. Otherwise, tough luck, life goes on.

If you are very unsatisfied with the given reviews, which will be harsh because critiques are never sugarcoated, feel free to lodge a complain or grouse about in my two domains. It matters not, because if you are a supercilious, unpalatable author, it only amuses me further so.
Visit my website here and my forum, Flamer's Inc. here.


I target Meg Cabot, Twilight, Harry Potter and some other kinds of fanfictions but the third mentioned mostly, especially SS/HG (Snape/Hermione) stories because I happen to favour this pair on my part.

Reasons for Flaming
Rather simply frankly. These are just the rudiments as to penning down a story, and if you remain lacking in that area, don't raise your hopes in acquiring "goodie" reviews and extolling on my part.

1. Language Flaws
If you cannot fulfill this, it would perhaps be better if you didn't write at all. This is one of the fundamental factors of good writing, and if you committ endless errors under this segment, you should stop writing. This includes punctuation, abuse of thesauruses (common trap for many writers), spelling, range of vocabulary and usage of words. It's best to keep a handy dictionary beside you all the time.

2. Dismal plots
Please. Utilise your "little grey cells" (like Hercule Poirot so nicely phrases it) properly and think of something that seems plausible yet original at the same time. Don't write about Snape mating with a bat, or of him kissing a doe because he misses Lily Potter. Develop your stories and remember to always elaborate why. Don't throw an impossible scenario of him and Ginny in bed because you know it won't happen. Don't tell me a story of how Snape's animagus form (a bat) reacts to the environment because it is abstract and plot-less. Do explain and expand.

3. Organisation
Another basic to bear in mind. Don't blind your readers with chunks of words or a continuous paragraph that is about 6000 words long. Don't bold everything or decorate your whole text with italics unless reason calls for (and it should be obvious).

4. Gary-stus/Mary-sues
Murder them if you have one. We know we aim to be impeccable in terms of character, but really, be pragmatic. It will do your stories an uncountable amount of justice, trust me.

5. Out-of-Character
I don't want to see Snape getting on his knees while shedding tears to apologise to Hermione, or you nicknaming him "Sevvie-poo" throughout, because it's not Snape. Remember his cold, snarky exterior and his pride for self-control. Utilise and manipulate it, but don't modify it the way you like it.

6. Rule-breaking/Violation
You know Fanfiction's guidelines, you know what fanfiction is. Don't post your original novel you are in the midst of on this site, because if that novel is truly original it should be on Fictionpress or any other place but not here. FANfiction is named this way for a reason. Take time to fathom why if you still cannot figure it out.

7. Arrogance/Supercilious Mannerism
You deserve us serving you flames, because you are simply too egotistical. If you ever plead and cajole readers into giving pleasant Reviews or attempt to threaten us flamers into not offering critiques, you are miserably mistaken, because we flame in fervor. Therefore, your cavalier attitude will appear to be extremely repugnant and unpalatable to me, so I drill harsh words in. Cannot withstand the harsh words bringing you excruciating pain that you want to wallow in despair and let the deep, dark, depressing hole engulf you as a whole? Tough luck then.
Welcome to the real world, mate.


Quotes from Fucktards

Some people, really are too supercilious and self-centered for their own good. Their regard and pitch themselves before others, therefore concocting the assumption in their brains that others must bow down to their "impeccable" stories and offer sugarcoated reviews.
That is not the case for me, dear readers. I believe in the nature of criticism appearing unadorned and harsh, for that is the way it should be, no matter if it is demanding or not. I will tell you why your story is so flawed in itself, and it's your option how you want to perceive this critique as, and your reaction to it will once again, be entirely up to you.

AidoRockz
"I am Canadian so I speak and write English since I was really young. You must not be from a place where they speak and write English that much, so of course it seems bad to you. Learn to understand English better before you read English stories."

"STOP IT ALREADY!! STOP ACTING LIKE YOU OWN FANFICTION!! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT SAYING THE THINGS YOU DO!! ALSO, I'M ONLY TELLING THE TRUTH. I SAW NOTHING WRONG WITH HER STORY. THIS SIGHT IS FOR ANYONE SO FU OFF ALREADY AND LET PEOPLE GET ON WITH THERE LIFES. Oh, and I got a privet message saying that she agrees with me, so you're waisting your time with this story."

Most unfortunately so, I am a Singaporean, and we speak two main languages in my country. One being English and the other being Chinese. So if you think I have not been in contact with English since young, you are certainly mistaken. Here, to erase and clear the stereotyping of Asians that other authors may possess, Asians do not necessarily have to be fools, and we speak as well as utilise mostly coherent and fathomable English to our best extent. I am convinced that I myself can understand English, and obviously write fluent English as well. So if you think your stories are the most impeccable types, go ahead, persist dwelling in your little cocoon and prolong this escape from reality. Your repugnant arrogance and your conceited, haughty mannerism repels me so.

Intersting attempt in stringing up flowing sentences, but you have a mile long left to go. From the most fundamental requirements of utilising good language, I do not see your fulfilling the said criteria in your foolish little rejoinder. Ah, my presumption of your flawless English (given as an attribute) must be erroneous on my part then. Sadly, the Internet is a platform offering an avenue to post freely-crafted communication, where we are able to bring issues to light and where we are not restricted by how we need to phrase our words meticulously or with circumspect. Also, Fanfiction advocates and condones readers penning down well-rounded critiques, otherwise known as constructive criticism (usually constituted by bluntness and severity on our part). Therefore, I can safely deduce that I am allowed, in every right, to utter what I desire to speak.

Spelling check: fuck (never be too mortified of spelling profannity, because you happen to correspond to a few terms), their, lives, private (Privet is the name of the street Harry Potter used to reside in with the Dursleys, and I can infer that you seem to have an inclination towards that word, perhaps because of your resemblance to the egotistical, conceited Dursleys) and wasting (waists are non-living matters and therefore does not do away with our time). I suggest a you revise your retorts in the future. I am after all, a debater with an experience of 6 years.

Cullenfans
Wooooow. Are you really serious with this?
First of all it's her first fanfic, SO GIVE HER A BREAK!

Obviously I am serious.
You don't give people breaks when quality English is desired to be preserved. Of course, on a side note, the story being her first fanfiction is no excuse for such abysmal work written. And I am displeased. When I find such profound distaste for dismal language utilised, I flame.

Ah well, I get that we cannot expect much from Twitards so obsessed with Edward Cullen they delude themselves into believing his 'existance' in this world. You clearly need a dose of reality pronto.

Twilightaddict471993
Fk off!! For your information make Bh sister did these stories, while I told her to put the story options on a pole!! She did this not me!! Last time I got to her for help anyway.

You either obey the rules, not breach or contraven them, to prevent flames, or simple, remove the story options and transfer it into a POLL, not a 'pole'. This is your account, so obviously we as flamers target you for failing to go according to what terms and conditions state. Evidently you don't, so we flame you. No use pushing the blame anyway, since if you violate guidelines Fanfiction bans YOU, not your 'Bh sister'.

Vampires4Ever29
and who are you to decide that? are u a famous author? publisher? im in the 9th grade, nothing special i just wrote a story and posted it, that is all. Look I dont want any trouble but write a story, then get back to me, everyone makes grammar mistakes from time to time, its the concept of a story that matters THIS IS OUT OF MY IMAGINATION if you dont like it then don't read it, but i am sure that everyone that you have reviewed you have reviewed with flames because their stories are not up to your 'standards'. get over yourself, the people who post on here are KIDS, TEENAGERS! WE ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE PERFECT. get a life besides flaming peoples hard work. O and go a tree.

As a famous Greek philosopher says, the aim of every individual's life is to achieve Eudaimonia. Which means flourishing in English. I am a teenager too, but I don't see myself to be that abysmal. To cover everything simply, you want to write, you make sure you don't write shit. You write shitfic, you asked for "trouble". And it's not really trouble in essence, I mean, we don't harrass you. We leave critiques, and if you are unable to handle that, I'm sorry, but that's what we flamers do. Don't expect us to sugarcoat reviews to trashy works like there's no tomorrow.

Writing does not only include concepts of stories. Look, the plot in itself is one important factor, but if you fail to string up coherent sentences, I'm sorry, you have failed too, in all means, to write. Writing calls for language mastery and for captivating storylines. It also calls for structure, lack of organisation errors and for sufficient characterisations. There are a lot of things that writing in itself calls for, and if I see you not fulfilling criteria I flame.

You need to "get over yourself", as you phrase so idly, and start improving your English, because evidently it is still flawed very much. You don't call a piece of shitfic hard work unless you do it meticulously, ensuring mistakes are rectified before you publish whatever is written.

I may not be a famous author, but I certainly am more capable than you seemingly. You cannot even write with punctuation injected and spell, for fuck's sake. Rudiments of writing again. I reiterate once more, you don't fulfill the fundamentals, we flame, because it is very destructive, and we don't like it. Ebert was not a famous film maker, neither was Simon Cowell, but they are famous source of critiques, and they offer critiques for what is worth. If people younger than you can step up to me and start taking criticism in their stride at the same time, I don't see why you cannot. Evidently so, you are worse than little kiddos. Who says being a teenager should be an excuse to cause dastardly damage to exemplary English?

Quil'sClaire
oh.Thanks so much.
I bet you can't write a
better story than mine though.
You are really LAME.
You probably feed on making
other feel bad huh?
Well don't worry. It's
not offending me at all.

Toodles!
-Quil'sClaire

No need to thank me. I can obviously write a better story than you, because I can actually string up coherent sentences and people can comprehend what I am trying to put forth. Besides, you contravened Ebert's Law as you claim I cannot write better than you, because that, you little insufferable chit, is no way to handle constructive criticism. I never said I will turn kind and sugarcoat critics, so obviously you got something erroneous there in your presumptions. This is precisely why you are flamed. Oh, and on a side note, flamers flame, but they sought not to offend people, but preserve exemplary English.


That's all.
Encountering fanfictions of abysmal standards can be a pain in the neck, and you know it yourself, so polish yourself up and learn to master the English Language better. Read widely; pull your scope of targetted books wider so you can take a look for yourself how brilliant some of the English classics and romance novels, etc are written. Don't allow agony to engulf you and wallow in despair because of flaming; instead, thank the people who flame you then correct your errors. Serious flamers don't usually flame for no apparent reason.