NectarAndAmbrosia
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Joined 06-18-09, id: 1974740, Profile Updated: 12-07-14
Author has written 8 stories for Harry Potter.

Facing this blank wall that used to be my FF.net profile is a bit disorienting.

All of my fanfiction under this account is from (yikes) 2009, and I'd like to think that the unbridled enthusiasm and gleeful self-congratulation in a fair number of my stories can attest to that. I've been inactive on this site since I got serious about my freshman year of high school, and as a college sophomore looking back now, I'm both amused and repulsed by the squeaky review-grubbing personality I was throwing hardcore into, like, every chapter of anything I'd ever uploaded, ever. I had ditched the email address I'd used to create this account back in ye olde eighth grade. Imagine my mortification when I revisited the abandoned email junkyard for the nervous titters between final exam studying, saw an old review, clicked back to this account, and landed ass-first back into this howling portal of my ancient past.

Well. I've (determinedly) taken down every smug, wheedling Author's Note I could get my hands on, and the result is this.

Nostalgia is a sly bastard like that. I'm now so heartbroken about leaving these stories, probably the most important part of my life before I tried to grow up so quickly, to croak and wither in the forgotten recesses of the Internet. Maybe, when finals and papers have swept this semester by, I shall return to the Potterbox and prod what bits of leftover ideas and dreams for this story (the Draco/Asteria one I so, so badly wanted to exist as a fourteen-year-old) into as salvageable a piece as wistfully possible.

(Don't tell anyone, but I think I actually will do that. A pet project, something to duck away from studying for. Plus I'll never get over Malfoy's stupid cutting wit or perfect pale blonde hair or satisfied little smirk. Someone needs to keep those big Gryffindors' messiah complexes in line, don't they?)

What's left of the stories is the work of a pre-high schooler, so if the styling or decisions strike you as childish or inexperienced, huh-huh, oops. What I'll probably do is post a brushed-up version of the story, majorly restructured to have actual direction, heavily revised to convey actual plot points, and post that separately. The old fic will simply loiter as a creaky spectre of my eternally hovering past, always ready with a teeth-grating quote or indulgent description when I need me a good cringe. I look behind me, and there they shall be.

(I also had a ton of text here a couple years ago insistently screeching on the supreme and undebatable correctness that is canon Asteria/Astoria's name spelled with an E. And how she mustmustmustmust be a blonde. And at least initially be a pureblooded elite snob, likely a Slytherin too. I regret posting all those with so much passion, but hilariously, and surprisingly, totally still stand by my eighth grade beliefs. But you're not stupid or loserly to believe otherwise; writing diverse fanfics is what makes this place so dynamic, why I found it so dazzling and warm and eye-opening, and why, despite my Adult Obligations and all those barren years from FF.net since 2009, I still returned to this crazy hurtling site in a heartbeat, only the tiniest twitch betraying me as I clicked.)

I'm fond of spelling Asteria's name with an E.

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Magical Relations by evansentranced reviews
AU First Year onward: Harry's relatives were shocked when the Hogwarts letters came. Not because Harry got into Hogwarts. They had expected that. But Dudley, on the other hand...That had been a surprise. Currently in 5th year. *Reviews contain SPOILERS!*
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 71 - Words: 269,602 - Reviews: 5785 - Favs: 6,770 - Follows: 8,401 - Updated: 3/9/2016 - Published: 3/18/2007 - Harry P., Dudley D.
The Death Eaters' Chatroom by Witchy Pixie reviews
What happens when the death eaters discover the internet? You'll find out! Bella goes to therapy, Snape gets hooked on webkinz, and there's even a visit from the chosen one himself! Awful, awful fic I started when I was eleven. and don't have the heart to take down.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 6,547 - Reviews: 192 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 8/27/2011 - Published: 6/5/2009 - Complete
Temptation by Aquaman52 reviews
"You don't know Finnick if you think he would love me." "I know he was desperate. That makes people do all kinds of crazy things." Oneshot. Finnick's POV, pre-Quell. Gift fic for Ariadne's Twine.
Hunger Games - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,547 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 10 - Published: 12/25/2010 - Finnick O., Katniss E. - Complete
Early Days by fairmaidofkent reviews
At seventeen, Lucius Malfoy wants respect, power, and sex. Narcissa Black wants nothing to do with him. Not that it matters; Lucius has no interest in a prissy little snob anyway. Obviously, they were a perfect match. *Not for anyone under the legal age*
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 61,021 - Reviews: 474 - Favs: 525 - Follows: 189 - Updated: 6/10/2010 - Published: 7/16/2009 - Lucius M., Narcissa M. - Complete
More Ways To Kill A Sue by Eavis reviews
Legolas is in love! Or is he? Companion piece to 'Best Way To Kill A Sue'.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 366 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 10 - Published: 5/21/2010 - Legolas, Aragorn - Complete
I Wanna be a Kennedy: The Black Family Tragedy by doing 25 life in azkaban reviews
The tragic tale of the last five Black children and how the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black fell.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Family - Chapters: 27 - Words: 80,024 - Reviews: 260 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 4/22/2010 - Published: 2/7/2009 - Andromeda T., Narcissa M.
Best Way To Kill A Sue by Eavis reviews
Something is coming through the woods, and Legolas is not taking any chances.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 76 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/8/2010 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
Rosto and The Haircut by Light of Polaris reviews
Rosto? Haircut? Two words that should not be said in the same sentence...in the presence of our favorite Rogue, that is. My take on Rosto's reaction to a haircut. Warning: Extreme vanity and inflamed ego. Caution advised. BxR. READ AND REVIEW! Oneshot.
Beka Cooper series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,165 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/19/2010 - Complete
The Benefits of Friendship by Foxieglove reviews
Gregory Goyle remembers Vincent Crabbe, both the good and the bad. Draco seeks forgiveness.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,370 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/28/2009 - Gregory G., Draco M. - Complete
Light by RiverOtter1 reviews
All but two of the fellowship sleep soundly. One searches for hope, while another guides towards the light. Short, one-shot fluff. Enjoy!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,172 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/16/2009 - Peregrin T., Legolas - Complete
Switching Places by Azure.Gauze reviews
Due to a stupid taunt, Regulus and Sirius made a bet to drink Polyjuice potion and be each other for a day, that is, if they survive the day.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,369 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 28 - Published: 7/15/2009 - Sirius B., Regulus B.
Lupin's Worst Memory by Krissyy reviews
Lupin is forced to stand up to his friends about Snape.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,561 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 7/14/2009 - Published: 1/20/2009 - Remus L., Sirius B. - Complete
The Five Rules for Being a Successful Bartender by LaneWinree51 reviews
The Marauders walk into a bar and engage in a competition to get the address of a pretty bartender.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,400 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 6 - Published: 7/13/2009 - Remus L. - Complete
What Really Happened Nineteen Years Later by Punchbuggie reviews
And you thought the epilogue couldn't get any worse...A parody of Nineteen Years Later.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 628 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/10/2009 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Different than Expected by vratsababe reviews
As the Ministry goes to raid Malfoy Manor for dark objects, the new trainee Harry Potter discovers the Malfoys might be more human than he thought.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,663 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 20 - Published: 7/6/2009 - Lucius M., Narcissa M. - Complete
Opposites Don't Always Attract by vratsababe reviews
Lucius Malfoy and Arthur Weasley lead completely different lives. This puts a day for each of these Wizarding fathers side by side.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 723 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/5/2009 - Lucius M., Arthur W. - Complete
Promises by BirdG reviews
How Scorpius Malfoy got his ferret.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 966 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 125 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 4/29/2009 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Draco M., Scorpius M. - Complete
Rosto's Cracknob Journal by Gurty Nemus reviews
Rosto writes in his journal with a pink gel pen. What a looby.
Beka Cooper series - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,135 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/21/2009 - Complete
Prodigious by MagikCat reviews
Anthony defines his love life with vocabulary.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,213 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/17/2009 - Anthony G., Padma P. - Complete
Crabbe and Goyle Discover Poetry by TwiLyght Sans Sparkles reviews
While bored in class one day, Crabbe and Goyle decide to write poetry. Bask in the glory of their literary genius!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 355 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/20/2009 - Vincent C., Gregory G. - Complete
Insert Generic Title Here by SilverLastsForever reviews
What? You thought I was going to drag it out longer? That would be realistic and not in the spirit of Mary Sues. After all, in fanfiction you list the pairing so everyone knows what’s going to happen anyway . A Mary Sue parody of massive ridiculousness.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,551 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/5/2009 - OC, Draco M. - Complete
Seven Husbands and Thestrals by iolah reviews
Blaise had seen what happened to the men in his mother's life when she grew bored, and vowed to never, ever, become like them.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,554 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 9 - Published: 2/27/2009 - Blaise Z., Theodore N. - Complete
The Lost Collection by Poohdog reviews
They could have been a very worthy collection, all five of the Blacks. But in some way or another, Slughorn lost them all. Professor Slughorn reflects on one of his collections, the Black family: Bellatrix, Andromeda, Narcissa, Sirius, Regulus. One-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,314 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/14/2008 - Horace S., Regulus B. - Complete
Come Here Often? by KimberlyJane reviews
A beautiful stranger from the U.S. enters Middle Earth. With hair and eye color that changes with the seasons and a smorgasbord of special powers, the only thing we can say is Add to Favorites!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,771 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 10/18/2008 - Published: 5/15/2007 - Legolas - Complete
Once Upon a Moon Baby by icefire-lioness reviews
Written for a challenge on SAYS. Draco tells Scorpius a bedtime story...but can anyone else see the similarities to real-life? Yeah?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,618 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/15/2008 - Draco M., Scorpius M. - Complete
History by Ketsueki0 reviews
History has a funny way of repeating itself.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 599 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 7 - Published: 7/29/2008 - Draco M., Scorpius M. - Complete
Necklace for Lily by vratsababe reviews
Severus needs to get something to give Lily for Christmas but there is only one gift he really wants to give to her. Lily/Sev fluff
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 619 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 6 - Published: 6/30/2008 - Lily Evans P., Severus S. - Complete
Inconsequential by iolah reviews
Thirty-one moments in the span of seven years when the Slytherins got along with members of other houses perhaps better than they were supposed to. No pairings.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,922 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 146 - Follows: 17 - Published: 6/15/2008 - Complete
Who the Heck is Astoria Greengrass? by hYpEravenclaw reviews
She married the most loved and hated character in the Harry Potter series, and yet practically the only thing we know about her is her name. This is my take on the most significant insignificant character in the series, Astoria Greengrass. Chapter 4 is up
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,576 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 3/23/2008 - Published: 3/19/2008 - Draco M.
Bitter Cold by Jess.91 reviews
Narcissa contemplates love, expectations, and cold. One shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 854 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/20/2008 - Narcissa M. - Complete
Rivendell International Airport by Primsong reviews
A bit of humor considering what might have happened if the Fellowship had decided to take a plane instead of walking all that ways - would Anduril make it through security?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,638 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 128 - Follows: 12 - Published: 3/1/2008 - Legolas, Gandalf - Complete
Shadows and Light by withoutfaith reviews
Sirius corners Evan Rosier for news about Regulus.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 943 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/21/2007 - Evan R., Sirius B. - Complete
Say Cheese by fairmaidofkent reviews
She just wanted a smile... Written for a contest on The Hideaway.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 213 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/13/2007 - Lucius M., Narcissa M. - Complete
One Last Lullaby by Lady Altair reviews
Andromeda sings one last lullaby to her daughter. DH spoilers.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,155 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 419 - Follows: 37 - Published: 8/2/2007 - Narcissa M., Andromeda T. - Complete
In the End by Argenteus Draco reviews
The Battle of Hogwarts, told from the slightly skewed prospective of one Draco Malfoy. Prequel to Hawthorn and Unicorn Hair.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,307 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 15 - Published: 8/2/2007 - Draco M. - Complete
Anything Is by KelinciHutan reviews
You know, Potter, we'll never be friends.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,688 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/22/2007 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Slytherin is for Lovers by powergirll reviews
A fic of romantic one shots set in the Slytherin Common room about our favorite guys and gals in green and silver.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,860 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 2/24/2007 - Published: 12/15/2005 - Narcissa M., Lucius M.
Dramione fic Suckage, Anyone? by Psychoanalysis reviews
So basically, if you're ever interested in the world of Dramione fickage, then come HERE for instructions. WHOOO SUCKAGE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,757 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 14 - Published: 9/21/2006 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
My Best Friend Bamfed into Middle–earth by dreamingfifi reviews
...and left me behind.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 881 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/14/2006 - Human, OC - Complete
Aftershock by Fyrie reviews
HBP SPOILERS The morning after the events of the 'Lightning Struck Tower', Draco has a confrontation.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,730 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/11/2005 - Draco M., Severus S.
Reading Over Someone's Shoulder by Verse reviews
Phineas comes across Hermione in the Restricted Section.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 714 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 8 - Published: 5/19/2005 - Phineas Nigellus, Hermione G.
MarySue in Fangorn by Tathrin reviews
With a flash of light, a girl appears in Fangorn Forest just in time to meet up with our heroes. However, things don't go quite as she planned...Completed
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,236 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/20/2004 - Legolas, Aragorn - Complete
Random Ravings of an Elven Prince by A.E. Hall reviews
I was sitting at my computer, when suddenly, a certain elf fell into my lap and started shouting at me in Sindarin... not a Marysue, simply a story of a very disturbed Elven prince.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,474 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/16/2004 - Legolas - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

A More Subtle Shade of Silver reviews
Mr. Greengrass is Lucius Malfoy's schoolmate, colleague, peer, and longtime friend. Of course Mr. Greengrass does not think his daughter's future father-in-law is a prissy, spoiled, and odiously heavy-handed sycophant.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,651 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/27/2015 - Draco M., Lucius M., Astoria G., Daphne G.
Respect is Love: Astoria and Draco reviews
We see Astoria just the once at the platform with Draco and Scorpius, with no mention of how she came to love and be loved by the most snobby/clever bully of all Potterverse. She was two years younger, virtually unknown to us...and whatever happened to Pansy?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 37,007 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 8/15/2009 - Published: 6/23/2009 - Astoria G., Draco M.
Drabbles About the Death Eaters reviews
A few deserved words from each of the short lives of some of the most loved and hated people in the series.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,290 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 7/23/2009 - Published: 7/16/2009 - Bellatrix L., Lucius M.
Draco Malfoy Discovers Fanfiction reviews
So what does he do when he sees all those odes to HIM, the Slytherin sex god? And when he finds himself paired with that nasty Granger girl, his MOTHER?...and Potter! Why, he reacts, of course! Alludes to existing fics & rated T for suggestive material..
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,739 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 7/15/2009 - Published: 7/10/2009 - Draco M.
Twenty Seductive Lines by Pansy Parkinson reviews
One day, Pansy Parkinson shares her collection of pick-up lines she reserves just for her dear Draco. Notice how they may be merely besotted suck-up lines. Prepare to be utterly stunned by her sheer cleverness and creative wit...NOT.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,657 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/30/2009 - Pansy P.
Twenty Quotes of Wisdom by Crabbe and Goyle reviews
One day, Crabbe and Goyle decide to write down twenty of the most ingenious and useful things they've ever picked up in life. Prepare to be blown away by their sheer brilliance.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 821 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/28/2009 - Vincent C., Gregory G.
Twenty Jokes By Percy Weasley reviews
One day, Percy takes it into his head to jot down the humorous things he comes up with and store them for future use. Prepare to be blown away by his sheer funnyness.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 624 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/27/2009 - Percy W. - Complete
An Encounter with Myrtle reviews
Scorpius Malfoy accidentally stumbles into Moaning Myrtle's bathroom...and finds out more than he'd have ever thought about his father in his Hogwarts days. A funny oneshot with Scorpius and Myrtle. No "romance", mind you.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,781 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/22/2009 - Scorpius M.