xxKrissiiMayxx
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Joined 06-26-09, id: 1985344, Profile Updated: 01-03-10
Author has written 3 stories for Vampires, Twilight, and Dark Visions series.

Well, I've decided that all of the stuff I had written before was a load of shit, so I'm starting fresh!

Hi everyone! In case it isn't obvious by my name, I'm Jesse! Currently, I am writing a three book series! Unsure of what to call the series so far, but the books are called Painful Memories, Pretty Lies, Hidden Truths! Now, I'm tired, so I guess, go read my books, and REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!!

Love y'all!

~Jesse~

10 Commandments of a Teenager

1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
(Why wait that long?)
2) Thou shall not do drugs.
(Alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.)
3) Thou shall not steal from K-Mart.
(Wal-Mart has a bigger selection)
4) Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism.
(Destruction has a bigger effect)
5) Thou shall not steal from your parents.
(Everyone knows grandma has more money)
6) Thou shall not get into fights.
(Just start them)
7) Thou shall not skip class.
(Just take the whole day off)
8) Thou shall not strip in class.
(Hooters pays more)
9) Thou shall not think about having sex.
(Like Nike says, "Just do it")
10) Thou shall not help old ladies across the street.
(Just leave ‘em in the middle)

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If 2 gooses are geese, then why aren't moose meese, or when 2 foots are feet, why aren't 2 footballs feetballs? Milk tastes funny if you leave it out for too long. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If your random and proud of it, put this on your profile!

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it, put this on your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes or more, place this on your profile.

If you have ever tried to lick your elbow even though you knew it was physically impossible paste this on your profile.

If you and/or your best friend are insane, put this on your profile.

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile

If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

if you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.

if you have ever walked into a wall before copy this

If you think that life without computers is useless, copy this to your profile

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever spent too much time of the computer, copy and paste this to your profile

If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile

you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you agree, that purple bunnies who are high on CATNIP and eat TACOS WILL rule the world, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!

you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste

If you have ever been worried for another person, copy and paste this into your profile. ( I worry over people ALL the time!! )

If you have ever shouted a random thing and then gotten glared at copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile.

If you love to play pranks on your best friend, copy and paste this to your profile!

If you absolutely love anime guys with long hair, copy and paste this to your profile

If you listen to music and like it because you like the music, not because of the artist, copy and paste this to your profile

If you don't care about who makes the music, no matter how crazy they are (Britney Spears, Marilyn Manson), and you like it anyway, copy and paste this to your profile

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile

If they are right...copy and paste this into your profile

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile. -evil laugh-... parking garage... yellow bunnies... blue m&m's... Aston Martin... random words...)

If you truly believe, there is an Edward Cullen somewhere for you (Doesn't mean his name has to be Edward Cullen), copy this into your profile.

If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile. Only a vegetarian, like the Cullens!

You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volterra" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done just that, copy this into your profile. (And multiple other Twilight words. Volturi, Carlisle, Irina, etc.)

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

I read New Moon and I wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD

If you like animals, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who haven't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile.

If you have a story in your head, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are a teenager, copy and paste this into your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile

IF YOU LOVE TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND, TOTAL DRAMA ACTION,OR BOTH THEN DON’T JUST STAND THERE COPY AND PASTE THIS TO YOUR PROFILE!

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile!

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would sigh and say: "where to begin?"

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Forgotten Relations by Kikoshiki reviews
Canada has always loved winter. The only time he can be left truly alone. But what happens when an old lover makes a phone call and he finds himself on a trip to memory lane. Now, the poor nation has met another potential lover, who seems so ready to heal his wounds, but with his past trailing close behind, will he be able to make the right decisions?
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,485 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 8/7/2013 - Published: 7/22/2013 - England/Britain, France, Canada
Hit By Destiny by ocdmess reviews
Bella wants to die, and almost gets her wish fulfilled when she gets hit by a shiny Volvo. She is left with serious injuries, and the only thing keeping her from dying is the person who hit her. All Human, Rated M for language, dark themes & violence.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 59 - Words: 463,685 - Reviews: 20079 - Favs: 11,593 - Follows: 6,888 - Updated: 11/29/2012 - Published: 10/24/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Bonne Foi by Amethyst Jackson reviews
AU. Edward Masen was changed in 1918 and abandoned by his sire. He feeds on human blood, unaware of any other way…until he stumbles across college freshman Bella Swan for a night that will change everything.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 41 - Words: 169,901 - Reviews: 14518 - Favs: 10,415 - Follows: 7,846 - Updated: 5/8/2012 - Published: 11/6/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Shadow Sapphire by Sanraita reviews
DELOS MAGGIE FANFIC! Everyone wonders what happened after Delos finished Hunter. Did Maggie stay human? Did they join Circle Daybreak? What about Aradia, Jeanne, and Miles? here's what I think happens. Pretty much just a continuation of the original st
Night World series - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 20,055 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 2/20/2012 - Published: 6/14/2009
Drenched by MizzHyde reviews
Drenched: A Song in 36 verses. Here comes the rain again / falling from the stars / drenched in my pain again / becoming who we are. AH / Slash
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 14,211 - Reviews: 695 - Favs: 117 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 6/23/2011 - Published: 6/8/2011 - Edward, Jasper - Complete
Under The Stars by NatBraaaat reviews
“Mary-Lynnette, my sweet Mary-Lynnette. You are not asleep. I'm here, I'm finally home, my love.” Ash was over her, holding his weight on his hands and knees, she didn't dare move. Ash was all she could see, her Ash, Her sweet Ash Redfern, her soulmate.
Night World series - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 20 - Words: 29,603 - Reviews: 256 - Favs: 160 - Follows: 92 - Updated: 6/9/2011 - Published: 3/9/2009
Since by MizzHyde reviews
Jasper & Edward, blow-jobs and shower fantasies, Bella and sofa sex, stag nights and drunken rambling, giving in to temptation, getting caught, confessing, nothing has been quite the same since, well... Since. AH, rated M for lemons and slash.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 15 - Words: 69,792 - Reviews: 1422 - Favs: 521 - Follows: 469 - Updated: 5/21/2011 - Published: 10/19/2010 - Edward, Jasper - Complete
Home by MizzHyde reviews
A locked box, a silky voice on the phone, a beautiful stranger in a photograph. Edward thinks he just has a place to live, but maybe this time he is home. AH, slash. Written for Dirty Talking Jasper contest.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,954 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 92 - Published: 2/26/2011 - Edward, Jasper
The Courtyard by latessitrice reviews
Bella is in time to save Edward in Volterra, but he doesn't give her chance to explain that they are both alive. Since Edward believes they are in heaven, he takes the opportunity to make the reunion memorable in a way she never dared imagine.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 96,617 - Reviews: 1011 - Favs: 1,828 - Follows: 852 - Updated: 12/12/2010 - Published: 11/28/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Moonlit Mist by panini999 reviews
Mary-Lynette has been waiting for her knight for one whole year... and she's sick of it. She decides to take the matter into her own hands, she decides to find him herself...
Night World series - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 133,558 - Reviews: 481 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 123 - Updated: 11/12/2010 - Published: 6/5/2009
Seventh Heaven by TheInsatiableVampire reviews
When Bella and Alice go to the "Seventh Heaven" tattoo shop, they get more than they bargained for. Alice gets seduced by her tattoo artist, leaving Bella alone to wait for her.. until Tattward comes to keep her company. Lemony goodness. One-shot. NC-17.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,845 - Reviews: 135 - Favs: 701 - Follows: 153 - Updated: 11/12/2010 - Published: 6/28/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
A Loved One by TwilightFreak00 reviews
Renesmee is seven years old and just finding herself. Between Jacob's new girlfriend, Jared's friendliness, and Nathuel's pact to the Volturi problems occur. *****GRAPHIC LEMONS*****
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 38 - Words: 83,507 - Reviews: 218 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 10/13/2010 - Published: 7/6/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob
Our Endless Numbered Days by Miss Elle Winchester reviews
When Jacob imprints on Edward, he thinks his world is coming to an end but could Edward be the best thing that could ever happen to him? Can Jacob teach Edward to love again when Bella moves away or is this love doomed from the start? SLASH Edward/Jacob
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 38,861 - Reviews: 391 - Favs: 238 - Follows: 276 - Updated: 8/10/2010 - Published: 9/28/2009 - Edward, Jacob
A fleeting escape by Vani88 reviews
*Won Honorable mention in the Best Domination Ever Contest* Post-BD: Bella and Edward are married. She was changed after the honeymoon but craves more than Edward can give her. Her deepest, darkest needs are met by another one of the Cullen men. Domsper
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 29,305 - Reviews: 356 - Favs: 326 - Follows: 332 - Updated: 8/7/2010 - Published: 4/15/2010 - Jasper, Bella
Love on the Seine by wandb reviews
A whirlwind romance in Europe. Five Years Apart. Can Bella and Edward rekindle the love that once burned between them? BxE All human. Rated M for language and lemons.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 29 - Words: 101,477 - Reviews: 1204 - Favs: 607 - Follows: 314 - Updated: 2/26/2010 - Published: 9/29/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
I Want To Tell You by forbiddenkisses reviews
Bella first meets Edward Cullen while attending his composition showcase as part of an assignment. So many times she should have resisted him, but she just can't bring herself to say no. One-shot, lemons, AU/AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,965 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/2/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Unplanned by jennde reviews
Edward Cullen has plans, and he's going to stick to them. Then Bella Swan comes to town and makes him realize that sometimes life doesn't turn out like you thought it would.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,123 - Reviews: 812 - Favs: 1,333 - Follows: 277 - Published: 9/25/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Sex Toy by Oriana de la Rose reviews
Edward Cullen has two jobs: Underwear Model and Personal Toy. Alice hires him to be the Stripper at Bella's 20th birthday party and Bella's attraction to him is instant. Then she finds out that he's her new Toy. Now Edward has a new Mistress to please...
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 94,171 - Reviews: 3130 - Favs: 2,856 - Follows: 1,316 - Updated: 8/6/2009 - Published: 4/4/2009 - Complete
The Adventures of Nessie and Her Lost Boys by alybee reviews
Post Breaking Dawn. With Bella and Edward away, Esme and Carlisle watch Nessie. Add in Jacob and his pack and the fun is sure to begin.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 20,467 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 7/21/2009 - Published: 5/30/2009 - Esme, Renesmee C./Nessie
Father’s Day: Some consider us Monsters! by alybee reviews
Post Breaking Dawn one-shot. Carlisle reflects on his role as a father after a disturbing evening in the Emergency Room.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,180 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 5 - Published: 6/21/2009 - Carlisle - Complete
Tell Me Pretty Lies by Natureboy3 reviews
Hollyleaf goes on a late night walk, her mind clouded with memories of certain events. Thankfully, someone comes to help her. HollyleafxBreezepelt One-shot.
Warriors - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,330 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/11/2009 - Hollyleaf, Breezepelt - Complete
Children of Her Heart by alybee reviews
A series of one-shots from Esme’s point of view as she reflects on the individual characteristics of each of her family members.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 8 - Words: 8,768 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 5/9/2009 - Published: 5/3/2009 - Esme - Complete
Turbulence by Mrs Ronald Weasley reviews
Bella feels nauseous while flying to Paris with Edward and Carlisle. Edward worries about her, but Carlisle reassures him that she’ll be alright. Edward/Carlisle and Edward/Bella/Carlisle. Rating for sexual content. PART II ADDED.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,984 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 4/29/2008 - Published: 4/28/2008 - Complete
Victory Celebration by Wind of the North reviews
In which Jacob goes too far. Many people have termed Jacob's aggressive kiss "rape". What if it actually was? The aftermath is held within. :VERY STRONG M: :Complete:
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,131 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 207 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 3/17/2008 - Published: 3/16/2008 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Love Me Like I Know You Can reviews
Not enough room, summary inside! Rated M for a reason!
Dark Visions series - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,637 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 8/1/2010 - Published: 11/23/2009
Forgive And Forget reviews
During New Moon! What would happen if Bella hadn't jumped off of the cliff? If Edward didn't come back? What would happen is Bella never forgot him, like he promised she would? If Jake still loved her? And what would happen.. If Edward came back? Rated T!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,190 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 11/7/2009 - Published: 10/31/2009 - Bella, Edward
Painful Memories reviews
NAME CHANGE! Jesse is a vampire. She meets Kevin, Jez, and Jez's gang, and she tries to stop them from killing so many humans! I am bad at summaries! Rate and Review! Rated T for a reason! No lemons, sorry guys! PLZ DON'T STEAL, THEY ARE ALL MINE! PLZ!
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,303 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 10/25/2009 - Published: 9/11/2009