animerules4eva
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Joined 07-04-09, id: 1995225, Profile Updated: 05-29-11
Author has written 5 stories for Harry Potter, Yu-Gi-Oh, Twilight, Dragon Ball Z, Naruto, and Percy Jackson and the Olympians.

Hey well my names blah. I like , Yugioh, Yugiohgx, Naruto, Bleach, Dragon ball/z, Buffy and Angel.

I've got a little thing to say to all my friends.
If you cry, I cry...
If you laugh, I laugh...
If you fight, I fight...
If you jump off a cliff...I'm gonna miss your retarded ass...

HATE PEOPLE WHO ARE DIFFERENT? CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING:

It's the same story everyday: A girl in dark colors gets off the worst bus you can imagine, you know, the one with all the dumber-than-dirt country kids who are swearing every five words, listening to a punk rock/gothic rock/heavy metal/or any other dark music. She shuts off the cd player/MP3/ipod and walks into the school. You and your friends are standing inside because you're too wussy to stand outside in LATE MAY in you pretty new Capri pants and new Hollister t-shirt.

You point at her and whisper to your friends about how out-of-touch she is because she's dressed in a baggy hooded sweatshirt and frayed old jeans and she's maintaining a 3.785-4.0 GPA on a 4.0 scale while you're boardline failing. You loudly insult her and talk to her in an obnoxious voice. She just keeps her head down and shuffles right by.

You laugh loudly and say, "How could you have gotten that one wrong? Even a fifth grader knows that!" when she answers a question wrong in class. You and friends push her around in the hallways and trip her in the stairwells. You think she should start drooling over the boys at school and should wear the same clothes you do.

And yet, no matter what you do, she doesn't say anything.

Isn't it hilarious that she can be quiet all week, but still have to put up with more shit than the whore giving out free blowjobs on the bus? ISN'T IT FUNNY that you don't mind fucking a random guy every night, but you go around ripping on her just because she studies in the library every night? Isn't it just bloody fucking hilarious that she needs to sign a pass to the bathroom just to run into an empty classroom to cry at least once a week?

Are you laughing yet?

HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED WHAT HER LIFE IS LIKE?

HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU GO UP TO HER FACE AND TRASH HER GOOD NAME, CALLING HER A 'FREAKY GOTH WANNABE' OR A 'WEEPY-WASHY ATTENTION SEEKER', AND NOT ONCE STOP AT ALL TO CONSIDER WHY YOU NEVER SEE HER PARENTS AROUND, OR WHY SHE ALWAYS WEARS LONG SLEEVES, EVEN IN THE SUMMER?

HOW IN GOD'S GOOD NAME CAN YOU TREAT HER LIKE SHIT JUST BECAUSE SHE THE ONE PERSON YOU CAN NEVER BE: HERSELF UNTO HERSELF?

THERE'S A FINE LINE BETWEEN BEING AN IDIOT AND BEING BRAVE.

BEING BRAVE IS NOT GIVING RANDOM GUYS A BLOWJOB IN BROAD DAYLIGHT. IT IS NOT FUCKING SOME RANDOM GUY ON FRIDAY NIGHT JUST TO SAY YOU FUCKED HIM. BEING BRAVE ISN'T TALKING TO SOME GUY OR DUMPING YOUR CURRENT BOYFRIEND.

BEING BRAVE IS TURNING THE OTHER CHEEK WHEN PEOPLE SLAP YOU. IT'S FORGETTING THE INSULTS AND REMEBERING THE COMMENTS. TRUE BRAVERY IS GOING TO A SCHOOL WHERE YOU SHOULD FEEL SAFE AND INSTEAD, YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE MARCHING RIGHT INTO HELL. TRUE BRAVERY IS BEING TRUE TO THE ONE PERSON, THE ONLY PERSON, WHO MATTERS: YOU.

KEEP LAUGHING, YOU COCK-SUKCING BITCHES, CAUSE I'M GOING FAR AND YOU'RE HARDLY MOVING.

HATE EMO? READ THIS:

Are you laughing?

Isn't it funny an "emo" can be quiet all through the week but gets more shit from everyone than the girl who sleeps around and sells her virginity? ISN'T IT FUNNY that you don't mind your friends drinking, smoking, but the minute someone mentions emo music you can give them a lecture on melodramatic teenage outcasts?

I'm not laughing.

IT'S SO FUNNY that you and your friends can make a girl's life hell and not know anything about the silent battle she might be fighting. ISN'T IT FUNNY that you can call emos, punks, goths the retards but still manage to get through your day without an inch of guilt in your heart.

HOW YOU CAN CALL A GIRL A POSER, HOW CAN YOU SAY "YOU'RE NOT EMO" OR "ATTENTION SEEKER" WITHOUT SPENDING A SECOND TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY THERE ARE CUTS ON HER WRISTS AND WHY SHE SPENDS HER LUNCHTIMES CRYING INSTEAD OF LAUGHING WITH HER FRIENDS?

KEEP ON LAUGHING

Isn't it funny you can say and do all this without any idea of what is going on in this person's life, without knowing her situation with her friends, or her family, or her LIFE?

BRAVE ISN'T GOING UP ON STAGE AND STRIPPING. BRAVE IS NOT SAYING A SPEECH. OR DUMPING YOUR BOYFRIEND.

BRAVE IS:

GOING TO SCHOOL ON MUFTI DAY AND NOT FOR A SECOND CARE WHAT THE WHORES AROUND YOU ARE SAYING ABOUT YOUR CLOTHES.ITS LISTENING TO YOUR OWN MUSIC AND BEING PROUD OF IT. ITS GOING THROUGH EVERY DAY WITH THE THINGS PEOPLE SAY TO YOUR FACE AND BEHIND YOUR BACK AND YOU STILL KEEP QUIET. ITS KNOWING WHAT YOUR "FRIENDS" ARE SAYING ABOUT YOU AND STILL CALLING THEM YOUR FRIENDS. BRAVE IS KNOWING THAT TOMOROW ISNT A BRIGHT AND HAPPY FUTURE. ITS ANOTHER DAY OF BITCHING AND DODGING RUMORS. KEEP ON LAUGHING.
If you agree, copy and paste into your profile.

When life hands you a lemon, squirt life in the eye and run like heck.

There are people in Africa that can't afford sarcasm, and yet, you abuse it.

Being mature is overrated.

Being weird is like being normal, only better.

I see regular people!

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.

Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.

Boys are like Slinky's... useless, but fun to watch fall downstairs

There cannot be a crisis this week; my schedule is full.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

When you get caught looking at him just remember he was looking back.

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?

As you make your way through this hectic world of ours, set aside a few minutes each day. At the end of the year, you'll have a couple of days saved up.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver

Make a man a fire, keep him warm for a day. Set a man on fire, keep him warm for life

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world wonder how you did it.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk

I'm not littering...I'm donating to the Earth

I've got A.D.D and magic markers, oh the thrills I will have! ( I don't really have ADD )

Life is like a pack of gum... I've yet to figure out why.

Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.

You call me a B--ch well a B--ch is a female dog. A dog barks. Bark is on trees. Trees are a part of nature. Nature is beautiful. So thanks for the compliment :D

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hates that.

Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out

Last night I looked up at the stars and matched each star to a reason I loved you. I was doing fine till I ran out of stars.

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do criticize them, you're a mile away and have their shoes.

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

It's all fun and games until someone get hurt...then its hilarious.

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

Never go to bed angry, stay up and plot your revenge.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

The more I learn, the less I understand.

"My mind works like lightning...one brilliant flash and it's gone."

"If the opposite of 'pro' is 'con', then what's the opposite of 'progress'?"

Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

Funny Quotes:

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Robert Bloch

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. - Maryon Pearson

What you call dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come.

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

I don't suffer from insanity I enjoy every minute of it.

When life gives you lemons... MAKE YAOI!

If you always stop to smell the roses sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.

There are 3 kinds of people, those who make it happen, those who watch it happen and those who don't know what the hell is happening.

When life gives you lemons make grape juice and let the world wonder how you did it.

I AM NOT CRAZY! My reality is just different than yours.

When life gives you lemons squeeze them in somebody's eyes and RUN!

"Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!"

"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings."

I ran into my ex the other day, then I put the car in reverse and ran over him again.

Life isn't about the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away. Like choking.

There are plenty more fish in the sea, but who wants to go out with a fish?

Some people are like a slinky. They have absolutely no use; but you can't help smile, when you see one fall down the stairs.

I lay at my bed last night, counting the stars, and I thought to myself: Where the fuck did my ceiling go?!

Ever notice how DYING is at the end of STUDYING?

Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one marked "Brightness," but it doesn't work.

Money can't buy happiness, but poverty can't buy ANYTHING.

MENtal pain, MENtal anxiety, MENstrual cramps, MENopause... all our problems start with men!

God created man before woman because every masterpiece needs a rough draft.

Guns don't kill people. People kill people. Well I think guns help because if you just stood around saying "BANG" it wouldn't do much.

If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?

If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?

"I reject your reality and substitute my own." Adam Savage, Mythbusters

“A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.” – Unknown

“When there's a will, I want to be in it.” – Unknown

When I was younger, my parents encouraged me to walk and talk. Now, all they want me to do is sit down and shut up!

Death is God's way of saying you're fired. Suicide is humans way of saying you can't fire me, I quit

The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

The spontaneous rally will begin at 1:45.

'It's always in the last place you look' Well DUR! Because you stop looking after you find it! HELLO!

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you.

"True love is when you don't want to sleep because real life is so much better than a dream"

I'm a little teapot short and stout; here is my hande, here is my...other handle? Shit. now i'm a sugar bowl

I did what they say and chose the road less traveled... Now where the heck am I?

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love

Six hours later, I still hadn't managed to write a full sentence for the paper due the next morning. However, I did win 7 out of 245 games of Solitaire.

Commit the oldest sins, the newest kind of ways. ~William Shakespeare

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. ~Dean Martin

The nicest thing about quotes is that they give us a nodding acquaintance with the originator which is often socially impressive. ~Kenneth Williams

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. ~George Carlin

Don't be so humble. You're not that great. ~Golda Meir

A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

Don't drink and park; accidents cause people.

I'll be sober tomorrow, but you'll be ugly for the rest of your life.

Those who think they know everything annoy those of us that do.

(bumper sticker) This delinquent is having sex with your honor student.

Every time I say the word 'diet', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

"Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

LEARN CHINESE IN 5 MINUTES

Say the words out loud.
1) That's not right... ...Sum Ting Wong
2) Are you harboring a fugitive? ...Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP... ...Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man... ... Dum Fuk
5) Small Horse... ...Tai Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the Beach?...Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped into a coffee table...Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni
8) I think you need a face lift...Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here...Wao So Dim
10) I thought you were on a diet...Wai Yu Mun Ching
11) This is a tow away zone...,No Pah King
12) Our meeting is next week...Wai Yu Kum Nao
13) Staying out of sight...Le i Ying Lo
14) He's cleaning his automobile...Wa Shing Ka
15) Your body odor is offensive...Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great... ...Fa Kin Su Pah

Try Not to Cry

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could

please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry I to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech
Students Who Were Lost

Please if you would,
Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as
"Try Not To Cry"
2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how
cold-hearted you really are...

Its ok to cry, I cried, so can you

Copy and paste.

93 percent of teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you’re part of the 7 percent who would asked that person, “What was your first clue?”, copy this into your profile.

A large percent of writers don’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re.” If you’re one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped where there was a ‘watch your step’ sign, copy this into your profile.

There’s nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It’s when you argue with yourself and LOSE when its’ weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you, post this on profile.

If you haven’t died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever walked into a doorway that you could have clearly dodged, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this onto your profile.

The white man said, “Colored people are not allowed here.”

The black man turned around and stood up.

He then said: “Listen sure…when I was born, I was BLACK, when I grew up I was BLACK, when I’m sick I’m BLACK, when I go in the sun I’m BLACK, when I’m cold I’m BLACK, when I die I’ll be BLACK. But you sir, when you’re born you’re PINK, when you grow up, you’re WHITE, when you’re sick, you’re GREEN, when you go in the sun, you turn RED, when you’re cold you turn BLUE, and when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve top call me colored?”

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away… Post this on your profile if you hate racism.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

Ways to Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso .

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds"

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Don't use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives,They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner."Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity...Copy and Paste this into your profile!!

The Crazy Hyperactive Authoress To-Do List: Created by Wolf (She-Who-Has-A-Very-Long-Name)

1.) Write Saw: The Musical.

2.) Develop the ability to talk to vegetables.

3.) Learn how to "billow" like Severus Snape.

4.) Make action figure of yourself.

5.) Prove to the word that gay sparkly vampires are even more pathetic than they believe.

6.) Enrage obsessed fan girls.

7.) Scream out random endings when walking out of the movie theater. (I can't believe it! Optimus killed Sam and ran off with Megatron!)

8.) Teach monkeys how to skydive.

9.) Create first ever cheese laser.

10.) Have own theme music.

11.) Find the penny at the bottom of the razor blade and and salt-filled jar.

12.) Discover why Dora the Explorer's parents let her explore the world all by herself.

13.) Sing made-up lyrics to Christmas Carols. During the summer.

14.) Read Shakespeare. You know, like in Romeo and Juliet, where Juliet fights that lion, and Romeo destroys the giant space station, and they all go to Burger King...yeah, I don't really know my Shakespeare stuff that well.

15.) Also prove to the children how Santa sits on the throne of lies.

16.) If this isn't enough, scream "I GOT CAKE MIX!" all the time. (Nemesis.)

17.) Warn younger children that if they aren't good this Christmas, Santa's little Dementors will come and suck all of their happiness away. Run from livid parents.

18.) Use security cameras as mirrors to pick your nose.

19.) Run around with a Force FX lightsaber, claimign you are a Jedi that must slay the evils of the world. Then attack anyone wearing Hannah Montana apparel.

20.) Develop sense of irony.

21.) Don't die yet.

22.) Copy and paste this onto your profile if you're an insane authoress/author, too!

17 Things to do when you're in Walmart!

1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"

12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

15. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!", or "I choose YOU, PIKACHU!!"

16. Have a friend push you down the aisle in a shopping cart as you yell "THE REDNECKS ARE COMING! THE REDNECKS ARE COMING!"

17. Shout at the top of your lungs "WALDEMORT IS TAKING OVER!" and count how many people turn to look at you.

On a Myer hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping".
(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap".
(And that would be how?)

On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost".
(But, it's just a suggestion).

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down".
(Too late! You lose!)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating".
(And you thought... what?...)

On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body".
(But wouldn't that save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication".
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness".
(...thanks for the warning?)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only".
(As opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor:"Not to be used for the other use".
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Nobby's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts".
("WHAT" spits nuts out and looks at them weird "no wonder they didnt taste like pinapples)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts".
(aww, but i was going to through them at people)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly

(while running of a cliff "WAIT! WHAT?!)

Copy and paste.

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

you loved DH, HBP, OotP, GoF, PoA, CoS, and SS/PS, and know what all those initials stand for, copy and paste this on your account.

If you are Harry Potter obsessed, copy this into you profile and add your name: Ga Nat Nat, Evil Older Sister, Frozenfan, The Choco-Holic, Jade Snape-Holloway, psychotic me, LLAMAS WILL RULE THE WORLD, PrettyFanGirl, Cannotstopwriting, jasmineflower27, ArianaRae, Susly,She-Who-Has-Fallen-For-Fred, worldsbiggesttwilightfan.

If you're one of the few people who actually reads profiles, copy and paste this into your profile.

If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

If you cried when Fred Weasley died ((in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows)), and not afraid to admit it, copy, paste this on your profile.

If you cried when Dobby died ((in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows)), copy and paste this into your profile.

If you want J.K.R. to make a series about the Marauders, copy this into your profile.

If you love Harry Potter, copy this into your profile.

If you spend a lot of time wishing Hogwarts existed, copy and paste this into your account.

If you cried reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, please copy and paste this into your profile.

So, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil? If you agree with that copy and paste this into your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If random songs just pop into your head at any given moment,copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

I'm sarcastic, always, and I love it.

Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is.

Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’.

Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever.

Professor Moody … the best ‘teaching’ Hoqwarts has seen in a while.

Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to tell her.

Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’.

Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy … disagrees.

Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand.

Ron Weasley … is very afraid.

Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much.

Ginny Weasley … wants her Hogwarts toilet seat.

Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out.

George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out and are not remotely sorry.

Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter.

James Potter … doesn’t believe her.

Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’.

Sirius Black … killed by drapery.

Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggle – screw the consequences.

Bellatrix Black … is quietly going insane.

Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush.

Voldemort … does not think it would be funny if HP were to put on earmuffs and pulled out a mandrake in his presence.

Gryffindors … will jump off a cliff.

Slytherins … will push someone else off.

Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase.

Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet.


f you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.

The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

If you can read that please put it in your profile.

This story is about a little girl that was abused. If you care about it, copy and paste it to your profile.

My name is sarah I am but three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see,

I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly, Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong Or else I'm locked up All the day long

When I awake I'm all alone The house is dark My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice, So maybe I'll get just One whipping tonight

Don't make a sound! I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse My name he calls I press myself Against the wall.

I try and hide From his evil eyes I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry.

He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words, He says its my fault That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me And yells at me more, I finally get free And I run for the door.

He's already locked it And I start to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream But its now much too late His face has been twisted Into unimaginable hate.

The hurt and the pain Again and again Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops And heads for the door, While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor.

My name is Sarah And I am but three, Tonight my daddy, Murdered me.

Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!

Now you have two choices

1) repost and show you care

2)ignore it and you have just proven you have a low-down, cold-heart

(Please just copy and paste this on to your site and show that you care)


Yay Bunny! (\_/) copy and paste to help the bunny DOMINATE THE WORLD!!

Yay Bunny!(='.'=)
Yay Bunny!(")_(")

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I'm Not Exactly Human by Twilightloverforeverandever reviews
Edward left Bella, alone in the woods, thinking he didn't love her. Six months on and she has returned to the place she calls home, Hogwarts, but what happens when Edward and the rest of the Cullens show up? What will Bella do? ON HIATUS! SORRY!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 49,595 - Reviews: 945 - Favs: 569 - Follows: 520 - Updated: 8/6/2010 - Published: 3/13/2009 - Edward, Bella
Magical Secrets: Twilight & Harry Potter by AStudyInTeal reviews
Bella was sent to Forks as a Mission for the Order of the Phoenix. Edward left her, now she's returned as a failure. Voldemort's power is growing & the Cullens come to Hogwarts. Bella is supposed to help Harry defeat Voldemort but, can she? Summary inside
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 36 - Words: 52,586 - Reviews: 287 - Favs: 177 - Follows: 98 - Updated: 7/19/2010 - Published: 6/21/2009 - Complete
Marked for life by jess-luvs-music reviews
When Bella and her twin Jasper's parents die, there put in foster care. After 3 years of misery, one night of hell and abuse from Paul, there adopted and saved by Carlisle and Esme. But what happens when Paul comes back, and wants Bella back.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 13 - Words: 38,620 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 281 - Follows: 98 - Updated: 7/30/2009 - Published: 7/1/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
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the fate of the world reviews
Cari is Goku's younger sister,the same age as Gohan. She has to go to camp half blood, but what happens when they need help to win the war? And who is Kronos's new ali. Crap summary better one inside. rated T for language.
Crossover - Dragon Ball Z & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 9 - Words: 11,179 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 6/11/2012 - Published: 6/12/2010
Harry has a sister book one reviews
What if Harry hadn't been an only child. What if he had a twin sister and together they were supposed to fight voldemort, but they got separated. She's a metamorphagus named Jessica. Raised in Hogwarts knowing so much about the wizzarding world except
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,221 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 6/11/2012 - Published: 9/19/2009
Calico Olympian reviews
Bellas not your normal human, infact she's not even all human. She never loved Ewdard and she only came to Forks for saftey, when you're the daughter of all of the big three monsters tend to come after you, so when Edward leaves she decides to go home.
Crossover - Twilight & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,197 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 139 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 6/11/2012 - Published: 3/29/2010 - Bella, Percy J.
Bella and Yugi, twins? reviews
Bella has secret. Edward respect dat. Min oneis that she has twin Yugi milenium item. The spirit of the princes in necklace. no charlie. They notsen each other since batle city. Yugi and Atem never duled and after dat and after new moon.twilight yugioh hp
Crossover - Yu-Gi-Oh & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 12 - Words: 8,188 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 6/11/2012 - Published: 11/5/2009
Birthday boy reviews
this is just a sad little one shot on how I think Naruto feels as a kid on his birthday.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 296 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/6/2011 - Naruto U. - Complete