I digress, I love to read, write, play video games (XBOX, Playstation and computer), eat (anything) and I have a strong love but not-quite obsession with anything and everything related to Japan. And that is mainly because loves that I can't afford it. Hobbies are expensive and I've had to cut back over the years, but you know what is free? Creative writing.

Brief background about myself, I, originally, came to fanfiction.net years ago but I was writing Dragonball Z stories if you can believe that. Sadly, no you can't go back and find any of my stories because during that time there was a censoring war - someone didn't appreciate my lemons and despite the fact that they had an M-rating wasn't willing to fight the good fight. During that time I went on living my life, secretly missing the creative juices that would flow when I would sit down after being hit with a story idea...until...it fizzled out. THEN! One dark and clear night I went to the midnight premiere of Twilight. At the time I hadn't heard of it and with my long 18-1/2 hr day I had no time for reading - pfft TV? What is this strange thing you speak of? I had no idea what I was getting into but tagged along, because a girl deserves a night to just kick it, right? But as I'm sitting in the theater being told on the sly to 'wait for it, wait for when he walks into the sunlight' I then looked up and saw a tanned god - no demi-god. He was cute, he was [email protected]@ AND HE HAS A GORGEOUS SMILE!! I leaned over asking if this 'Jacob' character would be back again to only be hushed harshly and whisper-yelled that I wouldn't like him. 'Oh, read the books and you'll hate him.' But - but how could you hate someone with a smile like that? He seemed sweet and plus he didn't seem to be insomniactically (yes, I made that word up) stalking this pale-as-snow girl. But my Jacob came back and he looked so hot all dressed up for the prom. And BAM! I'm hooked, I must know more about this Jacob Black character because that look at the end of the movie was so ominous - so promising that oh 'he'll be back' (says in horrible Arnold voice). So I read the books: breezed through Twilight, held my breath through New Moon, told Jacob he could do better in Eclipse and finally...finally I THREW THE DAMNED PIECE OF SHIT THAT'S KNOWN AS BREAKING DAWN.

I frightened a co-worker with my angry outburst over the clusterfuck of an ending. I mean WHO pulls out a gun, waves it and says, 'see this? Yea, nice, huh? What if I shot you for pissing you off? Ah, girl, you crazy! I ain't gonna shoot you even though you pissed me off because you told me that that guy over there would be upset and even though I could kill him too and get away with it I'm not going to. Why? I don't know why.' And then just walks away. NO! NO SIR!! YOU COME BACK HERE AND EXPLAIN WHY YOU SHOWED ME THE GUN IN THE FIRST PLACE. Especially since I really wasn't afraid of it in the first place.

Breaking Dawn was like watching Jurassic Park with the dinosaurs and you just know that one of them is going to get out and tear into someone. Instead, the t-rex shows up and then - then smells everyone and walks away. Seriously-confused-and-disappointed-movie-goer say 'what now?' I paid good money to read about a battle and what did I get? Nothing.

And I realized...this is all fine and dandy for a much younger generation of readers who have been raised to believe that they are all winners, that everyone likes them, the moon is made of green cheese, vampires sparkle and the Holocaust never happened and was simply a grossly blown out of proportion misunderstanding. And so I decided that I'd melt the anger and outrage with a storyline that I approved of. That had the ending that should've taken place. Mainly, Jacob didn't lose his right to choose and ran off with Leah. *gets starry-eyed* And I could kiss those sexy little lips of Paul's. The latter has never happened in writing but up here *tabs temple* it happens all the time. LOL.

So that's my fanfiction writing background.

Something else?

Well...oh! I'm an introvert who has learned to exhibit extroverted tendencies, however, it drains my battery. But introverts always tend to shine once you put them in front of a computer because we're not actually making any physical contact or have to keep reading nonverbal cues.

I'm an Aries so I am very independent, generous (which is one of many of my weaknesses - hot guys is another). I tend to be moody and short-tempered but since I'm an introvert I internalize it and wait for the most inopportune moment to unleash my fury like THE INCREDIBLE HULK!! *rips shirt* I won't say I'm a brat but others have, do and quite possibly will. Pfft, what do they know? Some will have you believe that we are liars and that is SO not true and that we're bad liars is even more untrue. A bad liar is someone who tells a lie that they know is unbelievable to begin with. Want to learn the art of lying? PM me.

Somehow, I've always been the girl-class clown. Maybe because of the independence, the desire to march to my own beat and I hate to lose. So, I try at least twice a week to make someone laugh and so far I've not failed.

I'm bossy - enough said.

And this could go on and on but if you want to learn more about me then just read some of my A/N where I usually tell people about what's going in my life at that moment or since my last update. I love reviews because not only are they love but they also tell me how I'm doing.

NOW! This is VERY IMPORTANT!!

I'm always up for constructive criticism. Note the keyword 'constructive'. So don't tell me 'this sucks' and leave it at that. You sir, madam or child need to expound more upon that thought because how am I to improve? If you don't know how to do it...then, guess what? The problem isn't me - it's you. Yea, I just went there. I've had like three bad reviews where there was nothing else AND they went all anonymous on me. That means we can't have a dialogue to help me improve because I do want to improve. Oh, and if you have an issue with my speaking style I can't help you there because that's my style and that's what I will use with the characters if I feel it is suitable. There's regular Kei and then there's business Kei. Business Kei gets left at her desk at the end of the work day. You think I'm vulgar - well, that's your issue cuz I'm a tomboy and think that dogs humping for dominance is funny and I do enjoy partaking in a song about farts. I'm a simple girl with sometimes not so simple tastes.

Ja'ne =3

In order from A-Z, we're writing a creative one-shot following the prompt provided for each letter. The chapter will need to be an original storyline, as AU as you want it, and must be Blackwater. Length doesn't matter, and no one letter should relate to any of the others. It'll be just a jumble of Blackwatery yumminess in the form of the alphabet.

A is for Argument
B is for Ball
C is for Camp
D is for Dad
E is for Evil
F is for Fox
G is for Gods
H is for Human
I is for Iron
J is for Jet
K is for Keeper
L is for Lace
M is for Murder/Mystery
N is for Ninja
O is for Office
P is for Pure
Q is for Quarter
R is for Radar
S is for Snake
T is for Toy
U is for Umbrella
V is for Vacancy
W is for Waiting
X is for X-Mas
Y is for Yearn
Z is for Zombie

And yes, yes 'X' was a stretch. We are perfectly aware of it but I dare you to come up with a good word that starts with X that inspires a story cuz all I had was x-ray and xylophone.

My WILF Girls aka Wolves I'd Love to Fuck (if you didn't already know):

hilja - leaves the best reviews and I always look forward to them. Hilja writes the best wolf pack flashback stories. Embry is just so freaking sweet and adorable I just want to put him in my pocket and run away with him. Quil...well, Quil is Quil. LOL. She also shares in my need to torment Sam every step away or just simply shoo him away. LOL.

cucumber07 - you keep me supplied with Blackwater drama, angst and just a hint of romance. You complain about your complicated stories and I love you for every single one of them. LOL.

sentinel10 - you my dear are becoming my smut pusher. If it wasn't for Jacob Black n pack I'd never would've learned how smut-tastic you truly are. You have popped my Seth lemon cherry and for that I salute you!! *salutes her screen*

I'm convinced that in this life all girls need at least one gay, a tall blonde Swedish girl, a crazy Aussie chick and that southern gal to keep them going and on the right track in life. We all supply one another with WILF love and even share amongst ourselves; although having so many to choose from certainly helps. LOL. But if you're looking for a great story to read just check out any of these ladies stories. You're bound to find something that you like whether it's romance/humor/friendship/hurt/comfort/angst/drama - I'm sure you won't be disappointed.

If you want to get to know me better then come and check out my profile at http:///. You'll also find the rest of my WILF girls there all under the same names as here.

But...if you haven't already guessed it. My top fave wolves are:

Tie between Leah and Jacob (depends on Jacob's attitude from fic-to-fic and update-to-update)

2. Paul - I just love his fine, sexy cocky ass and that smug smirk. *faints*

3. Embry - because he is just a sweetie! Better yet!! A muscly sexy sweetie...and I love Kiowa's eyebrows. I wish my eyebrows were like his. *covers eyebrows*

4. Seth - just absolutely adorable.

Fave Coupling:

Leah/Jacob

Leah/Embry

Leah/Paul

Leah/OC - preferably a hot guy who just blows the others out the water...which is rare. Which is why I came up with John. *sighs* John (more about him later).

Hate Couplin:

Leah/Edward - totally wrong. Edward doesn't deserve Leah because he actually found something worthwhile in Isabitch.

Leah/Jasper - I just don't like the idea of wolves and vampires coupling...AT ALL.

Jacob/Renesmee - *vomits in trashcan* Enough said.

Leah/Sam - Sam blew his chance with Leah as far as I'm concerned. *hugs Leah tightly* HE CAN'T HAVE HER!! *strokes Leah hair* It's okay. Shush, shush. I'll protect you.

Bella/With any guy that I'm already crushing on - basically everyone but Edward and Sam. Don't like either of them.

1o REASONS TO LOVE JACOB BLACK

10. He didn't leave.
9. He fights for the girl he loves.
8. He has a pulse.
7. He has a sense of humor.
6. He isn't a bloodsucker.
5. He isn't icy cold.
4. He is a good friend.
3. He doesn't give up easily.
2. He runs around half-naked all the time.
1. He looks freakin' hot without a shirt on. :D

OMFG! THERE'S A 14-SECOND NEW MOON TEASER TRAILER ON !! CHECK IT OUT HERE!! IT'S ALL JACOB!! (with some of Bella) BUT TAYLOR IS SHIRTLESS AND OH SO YUMMY!! http:///video/imdb/vi2201879065/

08/18/2009

And because I'm such a Team Jacob whore I've posted another trailer. This is the one after Band Slam. Gawd he is so hot!http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pPJRHM8EGkE&feature=player_embedded

Here is the latest New Moon trailer. OMFG there are just so many fuckin' wolves. I don't like Sam but I SAW SAM! AND PAUL TOO! GOD BLESS THE VMAs for airing this. http:///videos/movie-trailers/436357/exclusive-new-moon-trailer-premiere.jhtml#id=1621379

10/27/2009 - Here is the first TV trailer that I saw on Monday during Heroes. I've said before and I'll say it again...JACOB IS SO FREAKIN' AWESOME! END OF STORY PERIOD EXCLAMATION POINT. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cR9_rDSxxFg

10/27/2009 - What more proof do you need to believe me when I say that Edward Cullen is a creepster?! NOT, REPEAT NOT FOR TEAM EDWARD FANS...unless you know how to take a joke. No, I'm serious. At least this Bella is smart enough to move on. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t76YW7cTaHw ROFLMFAO

10/28/2009 - More of the sexy wolf pack.Sighs. Paul. - http:///video.aspx?mkt=en-US&vid=75551087-2d10-4582-ac35-a58f9c8e7225

11/27/2009 - Here is a copy of the Taylor's interview with George Lopez on the Lopez Tonight show now airing M-T 11-12pm on TBS. My throat is sore because whenever I see him I just have to squeal and scream. How could you not love that guy? Unless you're my nephew and my sister's fiance which is perfectly fine because I'd be concerned if they were screaming and touching themselves over Taylor. http:///x-704-Pop-Media-Examinery2009m11d27-Taylor-Lautner-talks-New-Moon-the-fans-with-George-Lopez-on-Lopez-Tonight-video

12/01/09 - I've posted pictures of Taylor from Rolling Stones in my photobucket acct. So check it out and just because I know you'll most likely check out the other pics - and who doesn't? But can you find Kei? http:///albums/mm177/Milleer329/Taylor/

12/13/09 - Taylor Lautner on SNL

Lab Partners - http:///embed/ssxqbA2UWjYRY4gwCkCMKA

Taylor Monologue - http:///embed/qcBSZ2qkj1bCGL3LJK7quA (please note the woman scream 'Ah-o' is a worthless red-haired cougar who needs to BACK OFF!! BACK OFF LADY, BACK OFF!!

Eternal Spark - http:///embed/oxi-N6N1GzUtS3rgWjoX2w I can be your new best friend Steven...with benefits. - Hehehehe.

Show Choir - http:///embed/gS5FnwDMnzDQ_X8CwzU85g I LOVE YOU MIKASH!!

Update 02/23/2010

While Jacob would be admiring your soft blush,
Edward would be resisting the urge to suck your blood

While Jacob would be able to warm you up on a cold winter day,
Edward would freeze you to death

While Jacob faces problems head-on,
Edward runs away, and then when things get worse, tries to kill himself

While Jacob is thinking about you even when he's sleeping,
Edward is watching you sleep

While Jacob supports any decision you make,
Edward tries to control every aspect of your life

While Jacob is sweet and cheerful,
Edward is arrogant and dramatic

While Jacob will do anything for the love of his life,
Edward will let her slip away

Really Stephenie? Edward over Jacob?

Copy and paste this on your profile if you're a PROUD supporter of JACOB BLACK!

Copy And Paste Things

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy:Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.

Shirt from Missing You: http:///Wet-Pussy-Spaghetti-Tank.html