Ryuzaki Faux
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Joined 07-08-09, id: 2000359, Profile Updated: 03-21-14
Author has written 3 stories for Kuroshitsuji, and D.Gray-Man.

It takes 82 muscles to frown, and only 8 to reach out and slap the shit out of somebody.

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

1. Children's Asprin: Warning: Keep Away From Children

2. Peanuts: Warning: Product May Contain Nuts

3. Curling Iron: Warning: Do not use while sleeping

4. Candle: Warning: Warning, A burning candle is fire

5. Frozen Pizza: Warning: Do not eat before cooking

6. Blanket from Taiwan: Warning: Not To Be Used As Protection From A Tornado

7. Frisbee: Warning: May Contain Small Parts

8. Butcher Knife: Warning: Keep Out of Children

9. Railroad Sign: Warning: Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.

10. Hair Coloring: Warning: Do not use as an ice cream topping

11. Dial Soap: Warning: Use like regualr soap

12. Sleeping Pills: Warning: May Cause Drowsiness

13. Puzzle: Warning: Some Assembly Required

14. Japanese Food Processor: Warning: Not to be used for the other use

15. On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

16. On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?

17. On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).

18. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

19. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought??...)

20. On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time)?

21. On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

22. On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and...I'm taking this because??...)

23. On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?

24. On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious)

25. On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

26. On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, ooh...fly Delta?)

27. On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

28. On a Korean kitchen knife-- "Warning: keep out of children."
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation..)

29. On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my ..was there alot of this happening somewhere?)

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, SesshoumaruKougaNarakuFanGirl,Funabisenu,Dragon of darkness and light, Miko Vampire, Ryuzaki Faux,

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, WeaselChick, Revenant666, darkflame1516, AirGirl Phantom, Agent of the Divine One, pointless people of Pluto, ZeratheNightDancer, Acegik13, Ryuu-Chiyo, Akemi-Chiyo, Archangel's Requiem, Animegirl92, CSIBeauty, Shining Zephyr, Miko Vampire, Ryuzaki Faux,

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Fight Me, Bite Me by Wild Rhov reviews
Gray has a secret kink for immobilizing people with his ice. Natsu fears his instincts and must be restrained if he wants to get intimate. When a nightmare brings them together, the two rivals realize that the only partner who could handle their fetishes...is each other! WARNING: BDSM, bondage, omorashi, watersports, angst, fluff, profound love... Don't read if you're sensitive.
Fairy Tail - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 57 - Words: 440,160 - Reviews: 2208 - Favs: 1,702 - Follows: 1,630 - Updated: 8/25 - Published: 8/3/2013 - [Natsu D., Gray F.] [Lucy H., Loke/Leo]
Comfort to the Wretched by BelovedShadow reviews
When Itachi was born and put up for adoption, he grew up happily with his uncles Madara and Izuna. His brother, Sasuke, was raised in the cruel world of the Japanese foster care system, filled with abuse and despair. When Madara and Izuna are alerted to the fact that they have another nephew, they are quick to give him a stable home. But is it already too late?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 8 - Words: 41,580 - Reviews: 178 - Favs: 154 - Follows: 199 - Updated: 2/11 - Published: 8/18/2012 - [Itachi U., Sasuke U.] [Madara U., Izuna U.]
Hematite by BelovedShadow reviews
Madara Uchiha is the king of Japan's largest criminal organization; living with an ongoing vendetta against the police department that has his castle crumbling beneath his feet. But there is one person, that he will not let himself lose. MadaSasu YAOI!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Crime - Chapters: 30 - Words: 123,442 - Reviews: 423 - Favs: 156 - Follows: 129 - Updated: 2/20/2015 - Published: 4/13/2012 - [Madara U., Sasuke U.] Itachi U., Izuna U. - Complete
Persecution by DewdropLotus reviews
After they're discovered by Howard Link, Kanda faces public persecution for his relationship with Allen Walker. Branded and humiliated, he still refuses to cave to the hypocrisies of the Black Order and the Church itself.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Drama/Crime - Chapters: 36 - Words: 27,668 - Reviews: 373 - Favs: 136 - Follows: 171 - Updated: 2/10/2015 - Published: 1/28/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
Yes, All These Ships Are Happening in the Same Timeline by The Broken Dreamer reviews
How can Aomine/Kuroko, Kagami/Himuro, Aomine/Imayoshi, Midorima/Kagami, Midorima/Takao, Kagami/Kuroko, Aomine/Kagami, and Kise/Kuroko all happen? Read and find out. Each chapter is it's own short story about the pairing in the chp title. They each stand on their own. This isn't crackfic. These are all serious accounts with some occasional humor. FINAL CHAPTER (kikuro) is up
Kuroko no Basuke/黒子のバスケ - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 19,804 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 8/21/2014 - Published: 3/24/2014 - Kuroko T., Kagami T., Midorima S., Aomine D. - Complete
His Butler by YamisGuardianAngel reviews
Two years have passed, since Sebastian was supposed to take the soul of young Ciel Phantomhive, but he couldn't bring himself to do so, because of the love that had developed in his black heart. Will they confess their love? Read and see...
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 10 - Words: 8,150 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 6/30/2014 - Published: 4/12/2010 - Ciel P., Sebastian M. - Complete
Incubation by DewdropLotus reviews
God has a terrible sense of humor and Kanda isn't laughing. And probably won't be...for nine more months. AllenxKandaxAllen, Mpreg!Kanda. Written to prove that it can be done right.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 90,522 - Reviews: 888 - Favs: 390 - Follows: 450 - Updated: 6/7/2013 - Published: 3/20/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
Smells of Cinnamon by MistressMichaelis reviews
With the all powerful demon at his command, Ciel phantomhive is the most powerful noble of the underworld; the Queen's watchdog. But, Could the little earl be falling in love with his seemingly perfect Butler? THIS STORY WILL HAVE SMUT, VIOLENCE, MATURE IDEAS AND SUGGESTIONS. If you are sensitive to such material, PLEASE DO NOT CONTINUE.
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,503 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 5/19/2013 - Published: 6/19/2012 - Sebastian M., Ciel P.
Kogane No Hikari by Anethcath reviews
Sasuke's in a world known group now touring around the globe. But as the final concert is upon him, he has a dream that makes him remember his severely missed Aniki. A song particularly written for him and the memories start flooding his mind. What Sasuke wants is to see his beloved brother.Will he be able to make this relationship between them work or will he be thrown out again?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,653 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 2/4/2013 - Published: 1/12/2013 - Sasuke U., Itachi U.
Hunger by Zexionienzo reviews
Based on the holocaust, depressing, smut, dont like dont read. changed rating for violence and yaoifullness in later chapters.
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 14 - Words: 41,704 - Reviews: 116 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 7/25/2012 - Published: 12/3/2011 - Ciel P., Sebastian M.
Curious Headaches by SoulSmuggler4242564 reviews
Allen is a new transfer student at Dark order High. Starting at a new school in the start of Junior year is proving difficult for him, and on top of his new troubles, some old problems seem to be following him... again. Yaoi, YULLEN, rated M -ish for later chaps. not as much smut as i would like, but oh well enjoy!
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 12,187 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 113 - Updated: 7/25/2012 - Published: 2/2/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
Grim Prospects by kdbug reviews
I'm Ciel Phantomhive, a typical high school senior—with the inherited riches, constant death threats, and a demonic butler. As if having supernatural nut jobs after me isn't enough, now I've got to deal with my butler stalking me and a creepy teacher. AU
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 19 - Words: 24,461 - Reviews: 161 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 6/25/2012 - Published: 11/6/2011 - Ciel P., Sebastian M.
In love with a Dark Rebel by IamTheKeyToYourHeart reviews
Ciel never believed in such nonsense as 'love at first sight' or 'true loves kiss' Only when he met a member from a band called 'Dark Rebel' with loving and caring crimson eyes, only then did he re think it. Short summary's can suck it! Read :D!
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,516 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 5/29/2012 - Published: 2/6/2012 - Ciel P., Sebastian M.
Opsimath by ErinyesWyrd reviews
There were words lost between them, time wasted with bickering. How Allen wished he could fix it all. After a mission goes wrong, Allen spends time with a recovering Kanda. What he learns changes the way he views the samurai forever. YAOI Male/Male
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,436 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 4/15/2012 - Published: 10/25/2011 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
What Master Wants, Master Gets by The-Fun-In-Funeral reviews
It's Ciel's birthday, and both Elizabeth and Alois have come over to celebrate. Seems innocent enough right? Wrong. Alois knows exactly how to make Ciel's day, and poor Lizzie isn't going to like it. Slash, lime, other warnings inside.
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,031 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 11 - Published: 4/6/2012 - Alois T., Ciel P. - Complete
Always Be With You by Princess Serenity-chan reviews
Story Nr.1 of the "Popping the Question Series". After graduation Takumi struggles with the changes his new life as a university student in Tokyo will bring; attending a different college and living in a different apartment than Gii. And as if that wasn't enough there's going to be a new roommate.
Takumi-kun Series/6月の自尊心 - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,600 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 2/12/2012 - Published: 2/9/2012 - Complete
Hell Of A Paradise by CLX-chan reviews
Paradise par-uh-dahys - noun : heaven, a place of extreme beauty, delight, or happiness. At least, that's what it's supposed to be. Here, two wolves will find out what they're so called Paradise is really like.
Wolf's Rain - Rated: M - English - Romance/Crime - Chapters: 15 - Words: 57,512 - Reviews: 132 - Favs: 121 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 10/23/2011 - Published: 12/13/2008 - Toboe, Tsume - Complete
Nighttime Embrace by Musical Sunrise reviews
Sunao's sleep is plagued by nightmares, and he wakes to find Sora missing.
Sukisho - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,377 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/1/2011 - Complete
Tough Love by Romantic Dragon reviews
Riki detested going to pet shows, and he was sure this one would be as bad as ever. What will Iason do to make it up to him? Riki/Iason.
Ai no Kusabi - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,544 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 139 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 5/26/2011 - Published: 9/21/2006 - Iason Mink, Riki - Complete
What Once Was by BelovedShadow reviews
When Sasuke agreed to baby-sit his friend's daughter, he didn't know he was agreeing to answer a bunch of personal questions, leading him on a trip down memory lane, where he begins to recall an old lover. ITASASU YAOI n't like don't read.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,230 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 11 - Published: 3/14/2011 - [Sasuke U., Itachi U.] - Complete
Cruel Love by xElleCorrupted reviews
ONESHOT between Ikuto and Tadase. Warning: YAOI, Shota, smut, be mature. Can't think of a description so read but be warned.
Shugo Chara! - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,587 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 11 - Published: 2/12/2011 - Ikuto T., Tadase H. - Complete
Silent Night by FallenAngelChuzlet reviews
Tsume is normally a loner wolf but one day after thinking about his life with the pack he starts to see Toboe in a different light, what will happen? TsumeXToboe story. My first Wolf's Rain fanfic don't kill me if it sucks please! Language from Tsume!
Wolf's Rain - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,519 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 2/8/2011 - Published: 7/15/2010 - Tsume, Toboe
Luminous Heart by L'Archel-Hotishi reviews
Sora x Sunao, Shinichirou x Nanami, Ichikawa x Nagase, Ran x Yoru, and Soushi x Matsuri oneshots. After Aizawa dies in his lab, everyone is freed from the torture he forced upon them. Naturally, this leaves more time for romance.
Sukisho - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,415 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 9 - Published: 10/24/2010
Loyalty by IcyPanther reviews
"You've always protected me, Tsume," Toboe said softly. "It's time that I protected you. We're a pack and that's what packs do. We look out for one another."
Wolf's Rain - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,622 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/19/2010 - Tsume, Toboe - Complete
Character Change by Heart-Shaped Quill reviews
It just wasn't in Tadase's nature to be that sort of person, right? "My, how that had all changed, with the utterance of just one word..." -IkutoxTadase, 1000-word ficlet-
Shugo Chara! - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,163 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/18/2010 - [Ikuto T., Tadase H.] - Complete
Bad Meets Evil by Obsession No Es Amor reviews
Itachi and Sasuke are Twin brothers Separated at birth. When Itachi finds out about his twin he'll do anything to meet him, Sasuke on the other hand would do anything to avoid being found.But when bad meets evil will there be love Uchihacest
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 87,485 - Reviews: 284 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 3/26/2010 - Published: 4/5/2009 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Find Your Voice by Majikaru Rin reviews
Yoru’s a mute and mistreated by his family, could Ran be the one to break him out of his shell and save him? AU YoruXRan
Sukisho - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 13,776 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 10/29/2009 - Published: 11/6/2008
Cry by Profound Yaoi reviews
Itachi goes a bit too far with teasing his darling otouto. Warning: Yaoi, incest, self-mutilation. Don't like, don't read. Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any characters.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 10,309 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 175 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 9/15/2009 - Published: 4/6/2009 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Sonata of the Soul by Light of the Darkest Night reviews
Sasuke a rebellious teen is being auction in a flesh market.His new master Itachi is as hearthles and cruel as many before him. Can one without a heart learn to love? Can one with only hate and hurt learn to trust?Yaoi ItaSasu ItaPein SasoDei MadaPei
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 23 - Words: 91,738 - Reviews: 567 - Favs: 266 - Follows: 120 - Updated: 8/7/2009 - Published: 10/17/2008 - Sasuke U., Itachi U. - Complete
Teach me by Nebiru reviews
New lives, new dangers... new choices are being made, and death is just round the corner. Never stop, or it might bite you. Yaoi: TsumeToboe, KibaHige.
Wolf's Rain - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 25,350 - Reviews: 150 - Favs: 130 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 10/9/2007 - Published: 7/22/2005 - Tsume, Toboe - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Once Upon A New Beginning reviews
"He had no-where to go, no-where to call home, and; Most importantly, no-one to call Family..." AU. Rated M for Later Chapters.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,655 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 1/24/2015 - Published: 11/10/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
School Days - Discontinued reviews
The rain was pouring down from the sky, hitting the glass window with a 'clink'ing sound that seemed to resonate through the empty manor and bounce off the walls. Ciel and Alois. Yaoi to come. AU. Sebastian and Claude later on to come as well.
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 14 - Words: 30,921 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 9/12/2014 - Published: 7/9/2012 - Ciel P., Alois T.
Of all the Butlers in the World, You are mine reviews
This is my first Story for Kuroshitsuji.. I hope you enjoy. It will be Yaoi later on. Don't like? don't read. thank you! Review!
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,539 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 7/1/2012 - Published: 4/1/2012 - Ciel P., Sebastian M.