x.Amelia'Cullen.x
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Joined 07-09-09, id: 2000854, Profile Updated: 09-27-09
Author has written 2 stories for Twilight.

I'm into THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual

I'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude

I'm BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch

I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control

I'm WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer

I SUCK MY OWN BLOOD FROM WOUNDS, so I MUST have a vampire fetish

I'm a good actor/actress, so I MUST be a liar

I'm a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone's ass

I'm a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian

I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant

I'm a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict

I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian

I'm a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie

I'm INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs

I'm a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life

I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd or suck-up

I have GREEN SKIN, so I MUST be a wicked witch

I'm DIFFERENT, so I MUST just want attention

I'm an ACTOR/ACTRESS, so I MUST be mean

I'm THIN, so I MUST have an eating disorder

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz

I HAVE A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be dating them all

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math

I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.

I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare

I'm PUNK, so I MUST slit my wrists

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist

I'm IRISH, so I MUST be an alcoholic

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore with a jock boyfriend

I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy

I LOVE RENT, so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS

I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hear crazy God voices in my head

I'm AMERICAN, so I MUST be an overweight pig with no boundaries

I'm a GIRL, so I MUST suck at all guy sports

I like CATS, so I MUST dance like a cat in my spare time

I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser

I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.

I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.

I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.

I SPEAK GERMAN, so I MUST be a psycho Nazi

I WEAR GLASSES and RETAINERS, so I MUST be a nerd

I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist

I'm HALF ASIAN HALF BRITISH, so I MUST be short

I DON"T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems

I'm IN BAND, so I MUST be a geek

I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST be rebellious

I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser

I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals

I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.

I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.

I'm a DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible

I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay

I HAVE a BIG FAMILY siblings, so WE MUST be financially challenged

I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.

I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.

I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.

I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.

I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore

I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals

I'm ALWAYS SMILING AND LAUGHING, so I MUST have a great life

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention

I HANG OUT WITH GAYS, so I MUST be gay too

I COPIED AND PASTED THIS INTO MY PROFILE, so I MUST be a plagiarist

I FROWN a lot, so I MUST have a bad life

I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life

I get BAD GRADES, so I MUST be a slacker who doesn't try

I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.

I'm a JEW, so I MUST hate all Germans

I like to listen to HANNAH MONTANA, so I MUST be childish and immature

I am POLITE to TEACHERS, so I MUST be a teacher's pet

I don't have a SOCIAL LABEL, so I must just be Emo.

I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be Emo.

I FOUND THIS LIST AND COPIED IT INTO MY PROFILE IN AN ATTEMPT TO HELP STOP SOCIAL LABELS, SO I MUST HAVE NO LIFE.

Your One and Only Wish

Do it one by one. Don't look ahead!

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex. Connor

2.Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow? red

3.Your first initial? K

4.Your month of birth? November

5.Which color do you like more, black or white? Black

6.Name of a person of the same sex as yours? Niamh

7.Your favorite number? 19

8.Do you like California or Florida more? California

9.Do you like the lake or the ocean more? Ocean

10.Write down a wish (a realistic one). Umm, Get a new laptop (:

Are you done? Obviously

If so, scroll down.

(don't cheat--THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person. --

2.If you choose:

Red: You're alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and aggressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you

love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are

down.

3. If your initial is:

A-K:You have a lot of love and friendship in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to

blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks good.

4. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.:The year will go by very well for you and you will discover that you

fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June:You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but

the memories will last forever.

July-Sept.:You will have a great year and experience a major life

changing experience for the good. -- Like sleeping with your bestfreinds BF?

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great but you'll eventually find your

soulmate.

5. If you choose:

Black: Your life will take on a different direction,it will seem hard at the time

but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change!

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do

anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend. -

7.This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime. -

8.If you choose...

California:You like adventure -- oh really?

Florida:You are a laid back person.

9.If you choose...

Lake:You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved. -

Ocean:You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10.This wish will only come true if you RE-POST THIS!!- Omg really??

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair!).

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (well no shit sherlock!)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

When Darkness Turns to Light by Janna Banana reviews
4 years after Edward left Bella in the forest; Bella is finally moving forward, but it is someone from her past that helps her truly heal and obtain the future she was always meant to have. Bella and Jasper Fanfic.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 52 - Words: 172,600 - Reviews: 3663 - Favs: 3,693 - Follows: 1,235 - Updated: 6/27/2010 - Published: 5/21/2008 - Bella, Jasper - Complete
These Dreams by jbluvs2sing reviews
It's been 3 years since Edward left Bella in the woods...she is moving on but is still plagued by nightmares from time to time. Will someone from her past help her get through her difficult times? What dangers lie ahead for her? Will her dreams come true?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 26 - Words: 76,054 - Reviews: 404 - Favs: 409 - Follows: 154 - Updated: 6/3/2010 - Published: 7/6/2008 - Complete
The Project by The Only Pancake reviews
AH. AU. Realistic plot! --- Bella is swept into a life of friendship and heartbreak. Will she overcome the obstacles Forks faces her with, or will she fall and be left in the dust? A story about love, struggle, rocks, and The Lion King.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 47 - Words: 114,492 - Reviews: 765 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 5/9/2010 - Published: 4/17/2009 - Bella
Long, Tall, Texan by BamaBabe reviews
Bella is going to grad school in Texas and her friends decide to join her. Little do they know that she has an agenda of her own. AH, non-canon. BellaxJasper OOC M for future chapters & language
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 42 - Words: 106,651 - Reviews: 1389 - Favs: 1,102 - Follows: 610 - Updated: 3/18/2010 - Published: 3/10/2009 - Jasper, Bella - Complete
Undeniable Attraction by LixiLovesWhitlock reviews
Edward’s whole perspective changes after an impulsive kiss of his best friend. He’s not gay. So why does he keep picturing his best friend in compromising situations? JxE Slash AH
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 25 - Words: 123,513 - Reviews: 1568 - Favs: 664 - Follows: 422 - Updated: 1/18/2010 - Published: 7/31/2009 - Jasper, Edward - Complete
Without You by Savannahbobanna reviews
Bella is on her own when she finds the clearing. When Laurent finds her there, her werewolf saviors are nowhere to be found. Is Laurent a good guy, or will his bad side overcome him? I deleted it... for some reason. I can't really remember why...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 36,132 - Reviews: 343 - Favs: 310 - Follows: 169 - Updated: 12/3/2009 - Published: 3/4/2008 - Bella, Laurent - Complete
Worth The Pain by NCChris reviews
Set about 6 months after the fateful 18th Birthday party from New Moon, the Cullens have left. A horrible tragedy strikes the Cullens. Can Bella help the remaining members heal? Bella/Jasper. M for language and sexual content. - 9/15/2013: 1K reviews...I am humbled! Thank you!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 50,150 - Reviews: 1026 - Favs: 1,129 - Follows: 295 - Updated: 11/15/2009 - Published: 5/3/2009 - Bella, Jasper - Complete
My Silver Eyed Cowboy, Chap 1, Welcome to Texas by TheDevimangel reviews
There's an old house in Texas, where Bella and her mother lived for a year or two. When she and her two best friends decide to go and live in it, what will they find? And, will they find what they want? AxEd, RxEm, BxJ. ON Permanent HIATUS.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Western - Chapters: 8 - Words: 23,111 - Reviews: 137 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 135 - Updated: 11/5/2009 - Published: 5/10/2009 - Bella, Jasper
Golden Moon by NusiainForks reviews
Bella doesn't fall apart after Edward leaves, especially when she discovers Jasper stayed behind. But with Alice waiting for Jasper in Alaska, will Bella find new love or be abandoned again? BxJas AU/OOC Bellie Award Nominee.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 55 - Words: 242,012 - Reviews: 5443 - Favs: 2,485 - Follows: 988 - Updated: 9/22/2009 - Published: 2/19/2009 - Jasper, Bella - Complete
Why Do Good Girls Like Bad Boys? by BloodsuckingLeech reviews
Bella,Alice & Rosalie are violent, moody, bad girl best friends in a punk band called "Royally Screwed." Edward,Jasper & Emmett are the new bad boys in school. When they meet, Forks High becomes their battle ground. AU-some human, some not. R&R !
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 33 - Words: 69,195 - Reviews: 1791 - Favs: 1,210 - Follows: 666 - Updated: 8/19/2009 - Published: 1/16/2008 - Bella, Edward
The Past of Isabella: The Immortal Child by Darken.For.Tear.Drops reviews
What if Bella is also older then what she looks? What if she knew vampires before the Cullens? This is before Twilight, before Carlisle was born! This is Bella as an Immortal Child.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 15,675 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 448 - Follows: 135 - Updated: 7/10/2009 - Published: 6/9/2009 - Bella, Marcus - Complete
An Ocean Away by Savannahbobanna reviews
Twins Ansel and Allegra live very different lives. Ansel lives in Forks, eagerly anticipating the day he will become a werewolf. Allegra lives in Volterra, loving the life of a Volturi guard member. The problem is, they have no idea they're related.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 35,362 - Reviews: 179 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 5/6/2009 - Published: 1/3/2009 - Complete
The Passage of Time by crysta656 reviews
He was gone, leaving her changed and alone. All that remained was a broken dream and a shattered heart. A Jasper/Bella story.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 25 - Words: 57,243 - Reviews: 640 - Favs: 761 - Follows: 266 - Updated: 1/6/2009 - Published: 8/11/2008 - Bella, Jasper - Complete
If It Kills Me by The Creative Writer reviews
Up for Adoption. Contact me.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 21 - Words: 31,366 - Reviews: 203 - Favs: 207 - Follows: 154 - Updated: 11/18/2008 - Published: 8/25/2008 - Bella, Felix - Complete
10 Steps To Seducing Your Hot Virgin Vampire BF by halojones reviews
This story starts off after Edward rebuffs Bella's modest advances in their newly acquired bed in Edward's room. But things take a turn for the better for these two lovesick kids when Alice takes things into her own hands. Never bet against Alice!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 92,432 - Reviews: 5065 - Favs: 2,957 - Follows: 1,437 - Updated: 8/28/2008 - Published: 3/4/2008 - Complete
Losing Love by Twilighter31 reviews
Takes place post-Eclipse, a week before Bella and Edwards wedding. Edward decides to leave Bella again but this time it's not only his choice nor is it for the good of Bella. A Jasper/Bella fic. Read&Review Please! COMPLETE
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 22,479 - Reviews: 396 - Favs: 436 - Follows: 161 - Updated: 8/26/2008 - Published: 7/5/2008 - Bella, Jasper - Complete
Better Left Unknown by The Romanticidal Edwardian reviews
Crackfic. Just a bit of stupid fun. Don't read if you have no sense of humor. Bella and Emmett watch his favorite show, so Emmett can teach Bella something very disturbing about Edward...One-shot. Short.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 800 - Reviews: 138 - Favs: 147 - Follows: 28 - Published: 7/24/2008 - Complete
Vulnerable by Santi911 reviews
The Cullens go hunting leaving Bella and Jasper to have a little bonding time. What happens when emotions go haywire and They start having feelings for each other? What lengths will Bella and Jasper go to in order to stay together? R&R BxJ LEMONS
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 26,606 - Reviews: 720 - Favs: 405 - Follows: 318 - Updated: 6/19/2008 - Published: 11/3/2007 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Life Ain't A Fairytale Darlin' reviews
Bella Gets Sexually Abused Since She Was 7. At 14 she finally runs away from home and finds 2 most beautiful red-eyed creatures on her way... Summary Inside. It's A JasperxBella Story :D
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,723 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 88 - Updated: 10/14/2009 - Published: 8/30/2009 - Bella, Jasper
New Moon What If On Hiatus reviews
What If When The Cullens Come Back To Bella She Doesn't Want Edward Anymore? What If She Wants Jasper Oce She Gets To Know Him A Little Better. Does Jasper Feel Anything Towards Bella? What About Alice Does She Think Of Bella As A Rival?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,410 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 7/21/2009 - Published: 7/11/2009 - Bella, Jasper
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