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Joined 07-11-09, id: 2004196, Profile Updated: 08-20-09
Author has written 4 stories for Inuyasha, Naruto, Hellsing, and Harry Potter.

I 'm a good age I' m between nothing and everything ( November 11 age 14)

Is something of a funny person but every quiet, Likes to watch people freak out on rides and enjoys a good friend and lover, =O= teehee

Will not stand loud annoying people that have no since in humor. And that Hate Manga or Anime so walk away people >:p

Loves to RP oh yeah!

Breathe in me...deep

That I might breathe...and live

And hold me close that I might sleep

soft held by all you give

Come kiss me wind and take my breathe

Till you and I are one

And we will Dance among the tombs

Until all death is gone

And no one knows that we exist

Wrapped in ech others's arms

Except that One who blew the breathe

That hides me safe from harm

Come kiss me wind and take my breah

Till you and I are one

And we will dance among the tombes

Until all death is gone...

I see the looking window

So far above my head

I really want to touch it

But I sit and reach for it Instead

I see the looking window

on that black stone wall

I reach to it with a sad face

But instead i fall

I see the looking window

It looks back at me

And it comes to me

There was never a looking Window infront of me.

( Little poems I've made)

/Paste phrases:

If you've ever slapped and/or banged your head against a table for no reason, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever laughed madly for no apparent reason, add this to your bio.

If you are crazy and /or insane and proud of it copy and paste it to your profile

If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy this to your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title ot anything else for each other, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever laughed out loud when you were thinking something funny and people looked at you with a weird face, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever been so wrapped up thinking about anime, anime fanart or anime fan fictions that you zone out and come back to reality 5 minutes or later with no idea what’s going on, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever been obsessed with something that you have scared people with your obsession, place this on your profile.

If you're against abortion,post this in your profile. (I am, I think it's wrong, no matter what happened(Though my heart does go out to those who are raped, etc) to kill part of your own flesh and blood.)

If you hate Karin from Naruto and want to see her get stabbed by evil spork wielding gnomes copy and paste this into your profile!!

if you've ever pushed on a door that said pull (or Vice Versa) copy this into your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy this into your profile

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you agree, that purple bunnies WILL rule the world, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile. (It’s not just fanfics…….O_O)

If you have ever gone to edit your profile, saw all your cut and paste things, and thought "DAMN! That is a lot of crap!" copy and paste this to your profile

If your friends consider you nuts, copy and paste this to your profile

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you think the semi-colon is completely useless, stupid, annoying and plotting to destroy the English language as we know it, put this in your profile!(HELL YA! KILL THE SEMI-COLONS!)

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile. (And in my iPod, and in my CD player, and on the radio. Music is everywhere)

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy this into your profile.(omg…there was 1st grade when I did….and 4th when I did….O_O)

If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever had random loud singing outbursts in public, copy this into your profile.

If your too lazy to copy and paste things on your profile, then copy and this on your profile.

If you did not know that a dentist invented the electric chair and now is freaked out, copy and this on your profile.

If you love anime, copy this into your profile.

CHEESE! If you are random and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever wanted to slap someone, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever slapped someone, copy this into your profile.

If you have slapped someone upside the head (i always do that), copy this into your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy and paste this into your profile. (There’re out to get me! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!)

If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile

If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile

QUOTES/FUNNIES/SERIOUS STUFF(Some of these are from different profiles)

Die of OTD. (Overly Twitching Syndrome.)

Friends will always be like "Well, you deserve better." Best friends will be prank calling him in the middle of the night, saying "You will die in seven days."

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.

A friend would bail you out of jail. A best friend will be sitting next to you in the cell saying "That was fun"

"People live their lives bound by what they accept as correct and true. That’s how they define "Reality." But what does it mean to be "Correct" or "True"? Merely vague concepts...their "Reality" may all be a mirage. Can we simply be living in their own world, shaped by their beliefs?" -Uchiha Itachi

"Art is a bang!"-Deidara(HECK YA!)

"'re still just a normal person. But I, living in an infinite universe of pain, have grown from a person into something more."-Pein

"I...find it difficult to embrace the full shinobi philosophy. I can't help but prefer that the two of you..Not force me to kill you. However, if you come at me, I will kill my own heart with my blade, just as the word "shinobi" was the words "heart" and "blade"-and act as a fill fledged shinobi would!"-Haku

"A skater broke my heart, so I broke his board."-Another person’s profile. I thought it was funny)

"Oh my god! They killed Kenny!"

"You bs!" South Park

"When life gives you lemons, you take them, squeeze them in someone’s eyes, watch, and then run for your damn life." ~A Made Up Quote by Inkaide.

Naruto Jokes:

Kakashi + Obito = Sharingan Eye. Sharing - an - eye

Yo mama so fat, even Naruto couldn't Believe it!

Pein can make it rain

Karin is so fat, not even Naruto can believe it!
Karin is so fat, not even the byakugan can see through her.
Karin is so ugly, ANBU thought she was in the second level of the curse mark, and kicked her butt.
Karin is so stupid; she took a shiet thinking it would open the 8 inner gates.
Karin is so old; Gai dropped his "Power of youth" philosophy on the spot.
Karin is so ugly, when she passed by Hinata, Hinata yelled 'dayummmmm!'
Karin is so ugly; Itachi felt like his eyesight was diminishing when he saw her.
Karin is so ugly; she made Jiraiya too scared to peek again when he saw her.
Karin is so fat she made fun of Chouji for being skin and bones
Karin is so fat that when Lee was doing her, he gave up.
Karin is so ugly, they made her join ANBU just so they can put a mask on her
Karin is so stupid, she couldn't find any of the "hidden" villages.
Karin is so ugly, the Nine-tails fled in fear.
Karin is so ugly, it's forbidden just to transform into her
Karin is so fat, Tazuna considered using her as the bridge to the mainland.
Karin is so poor; she can't even afford to buy oxygen!

Some crap that would never happen on Naruto:

Naruto will stop saying believe it. Hinata will stop blushing so much around Naruto. Ino will stop being a bitch. Tsunade will admit her boobs are fake. Kakashi will tell everyone about his life. Orochimaru will stop being gay. Kabuto will stop being his bitch/whore. Sasuke will come back to Sakura. Karin and Sasuke will get together. Karin will stop being a bitch. Suigetsu will give up water forever. Itachi will leave the Akatsuki and him and Sasuke will be friends again. Kisame will admit he's a homosexual. Minato Namikaze will come back to life and everything will be okay. Deidara will admit he's really a woman.Sasori and Sakura will get together. (NOOOO! NOOOOOO! IT MUST HAPPEN! That's it, I'm deleting this from the list) Gaara will have kids. Orochimaru will come out and admit he is really Michael Jackson. Tobi is in his right state of mind. Sasuke will stop being such an asshole. Asuma will stop smoking. Tsunade will give up gambling. And the Akatsuki will disappear, Karin will die by the hands of Sasuke, Sasuke will admit his love for Sakura, and Kakashi and Anko will get together.

7 Ways to scare your roommates!

7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate with a sadistic look and mutter, "Soon...soon..."

6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich?" Complain loudly that you’re hungry.

2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"

1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Month one

I am only 8 inches long but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy I'm a boy! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too and I cry with you even though you can't hear me.

Month Four

my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby. I think and feel. Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy I am okay. I am in Jesus's arms. He is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

20 Things to do at Wal-Mart( My cousin and I have done at lease 11 of these)

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in house wares"... and see what happens.
5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera; & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream...
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "go, Pikachu, go!"

17. Challenge people to duels in the back aisles with wrapping paper tubes.

18. Have a conversation with yourself loud enough so that people in the other aisles can hear you.

19. Throw things over one aisle into another one.

20. Mark out price tags with a sharpie

"When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand oranges."

"I think, therefore I get a headache."

"I smile because I have no idea what's going on."

"Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard, be evil."

"I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it."

"NATIONAL SARCASM SOCIETY: Like we need your support."

"Death is life's way of telling you you're fired."

This is a story about a little girl that was abused. If you care at all, copy and paste this into your profile:

My name is Sarah I am but three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see, I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad? I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly, Then maybe my mommy would still want to hug me. I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong Or else I'm locked up All the daylong When I awake I'm all alone The house is dark My folks aren't home. When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice, So maybe I'll get just One whipping tonight Don't make a sound! I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie's Bar. I hear him curse my name he calls I press myself against the wall. I try and hide from his evil eyes I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry. He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words; He says it’s my fault that he suffers at work. He slaps me and hits me and yells at me more, I finally get free and I run for the door. He's already locked it and I start to bawl, He takes me and throws me against the hard wall. I fall to the floor with my bones nearly broken, and my daddy continues with more bad words spoken. "I'm sorry!” I scream but it’s now much too late His face has been twisted into unimaginable hate. The hurt and the pain Again and again Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end! And he finally stops and heads for the door, While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor. My name is Sarah and I am but three, tonight my daddy, Murdered me. Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP

"With all the respect I certainly don't have... SHUT THE F-CK UP!" (Me)

"Blue smurfs! No, brown smurfs! -Pause to pass by the bakery- No! GRAY SMURFS!"

"One minute of silence for Jack Sparrow's death. ... HAHAHAHAHA!!"

"The squirrels are going to take over the world!"

"Bunnies aren't cute. That's what they want you to think. Then they'll sneak into your house, kill you when you're sleeping and replace you by an evil clone. Believe me. Give them some years and the bunnies will be controlling ALL OF US."


-sees me with 745-page book- "What are you gonna do with this? Throw at someone?" "

" 'This is my invisible dog, Bob. Bob spits fire.' (Xande)
'Can he spit fire on Ronan?' (Me)'Sure.' (Xande)
'YAY! I LOVE BOB!' " (Me)(Different Fanfic)

"Ask us no question and we'll tell you no lies." (Fred Weasley - J.K. Rowling-sama's character, duh)

"OMG, SOMEONE REVIEWED MY STORY! MUST ANNOUNCE THIS TO THE WORLD!" -runs to announce this to the world- (Me)

-sing-song voice- "I've got a jar of dirt, I've got a jar of di-irt, and guess what's inside it!" (Jack Sparrow)

-to Sakura- "You're annoying." (Uchiha Sasuke) (Hehe... love this one...)

"NINJA GUYS ARE SO SEXY!" (Aby)(different profile)

-sees Naruto picture- "OMG, HE'S SO HOT! I CAN'T LOOK AT HIM!" (Aby)(Different Profile)

-it's damn cold outisde and I have to go to school on foot- "I'm telling you: the global warming is NOT WARMING ENOUGH!" (Me)(Different Profile)

'It's like she said, but less enthusiastic.' " (Filipinho)(Different Profile…and I totally agree to it!)

"Time to use the... SHAZAN NO JUTSU!"

" 'I'm not afraid.' (Luke Skywalker)
-makes scary face- 'But you will be. You will be.' " (Master Yoda-chan)

"I'm not afraid to die protecting you. Because... I love you." (Hyuuga Hinata)

"DINAMYC ENTRYYYY!" (Gai-sensei) (believe me, doing dynamic entries is something very, very amusing)

I put the fun in dysfunctional-

People like you are why people like me need medication-

I like you. So when i take over the world your death will be quick and painless-

Normal people scare me-

You laugh because I’m different. I laugh because you are all the same-

Hold your head up high gorgeous these people would kill to see you fall-

-Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

-If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging

-My mind works like brilliant flash and it's gone.

-Curiosity killed the cat, and satisfaction brought it back.

-When life gives you lemons, make grape juice! Just so the world can wonder how you did it.

-Don't tell me the sky's the limit, when I see footprints on the moon.

-What happens when you're scared half to death twice?

-How do the skittle company people know what the rainbow taste like?

-Crime doesn't pay . . . does that mean my job is a crime?!

-/M/A/N/G/A/ my anti drug; cause when you addicted to manga how can you possibly afford drugs?

-In a dog-eat-dog world the best thing to do is become a cat.

-If the good die, young then the bad die old; thus leaving us with only
politicians left.

-Goldfish have the memory span of 3 seconds; sometimes I have to wonder
if I’m a goldfish.

"Behind every great man, there is a woman rolling her eyes." -Anonymous

-If your clone kills you isn't that suicide?

-Why do gas stations lock their bathrooms? Are they afraid someone's going to clean them?

A friend helps you up when you fall a best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"

A friend gives you their umbrella in the rain a best friend takes your and says, "RUN, BITCH RUN!"

A friend wipes your tears when your rejected a best friend goes up to him and says, "It's because your gay isn't it?"

A friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, THAT WAS AWESOME, LET’S DO IT AGAIN!!

A simple friend wonders about your romantic history. A real friend could
blackmail you with it.

A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names. A real friend
has their phone numbers in his address book.

A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A real friend opens
your refrigerator and helps themselves.

A good friend will care for you when you hurt; a true friend will be
sitting next to you laughing their ass off at you.

Q .. How do you sink a submarine full of blondes?
A .. Knock on the door.

Q .. What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common?
A .. You keep hearing about them, but never see any.

If you think that Sasuke from Naruto completly has to have the nick-name 'Chicken Butt Hair Dude', copy this to your profile while laughing your head off

I suffer from C.R.S. (Can't remember stuff)"

STUPID = Smart Talented Unique Person in Demand

Put this on your
page if you love

1. Hinata
2. Itachi
3. Sakura
4. Naruto
5. Deidara
6. Sasori
7. Kakashi
8. Sasuke
9. Tenten
10. Ino

- have you read a fanfic about 2 and 1?

Yes, I really didn't like it. (Hinata/Itachi.) They seem a little to OC when they’re together.

- what would 3 do if he/her found a love letter that was for 10?

Um...give it to her and squeal with her in happiness or excitment. Unless it was from Sasuke, then she’d just push Ino into the river.

- would 3 and 7 make a good couple?

There is a huge age difference between the two...but actually maybe… that I think about it….

- what would 4 do if he/her sees 1 and 10 making out?

Naruto would sit back and get some popcorn watching Hinata and Ino make out, probably call some friends to watch with him. Then video tape it, then but it on youtube….oohhhh, Naruto’s gonna get killed O_O

- is 6 scary?

No, well kinda but he is hot. AND HE’S MINE!

- what would 5 do if he/she sees 8 naked?

He would go;

Deidara: Sasuke what the fuck are you doing in my room naked,un?

Sasuke: Waiting for you sexy.

Deidara: ...DIE,UN! makes Sasuke explode MWAHAHAHAHAHA, UN! >:D

- would 8 ask 3 out?

NO! Sasuke is an emotionless icecube, Sakura would punch him to the next hemisphere if he asked her out anyways.

- what would 4 do if he/her is drunk?

Naruto would...make out with the nearest object/person most likely.

- would 4 be 8's soulmate?

In Sasuke's mind maybe but Naruto would run away screaming bloody murder.

- what would 1 do if he/she tripped over a pool of dog poo?

Hinata would faint, hopefully not on said dog poo.

- will 4 ever kiss 10?

God I hope not...And if Naruto ever did kiss Ino, I’d haveta sue Kishi.

- what would you do if you know 4 and 7 are married?


(゚、 。 7
l、 ~ヽ

Yaaaay kitty!

This is Kitty. Copy and paste Kitty into your
signature to help him gain world domination


“Well come on. We have a mission.” Kakuzu the man with the mask and stitches stated having Deidara, Sakura, and Zetsu follow him out of the room. The others left as well, leaving poor sweet Tobi to fix up the entire training room by himself. Deidara popped back in once again, “I expect my balcony back up too Tobi.” “Aw, Deidara sempai, this is gonna take Tobi forever.” Tobi complained and Deidara grabbed a little clay out from under his cloak and let his hands mouths take it and spit it back out to form a small clay bird. He let it go with a smirk and laughed as the small clay bird flapped around chasing the squealing Tobi. “I’m Sorry Deidara! I’m sorry!!” Tobi ran with his arms in the air trying to dodge the clay bird, or the…ticking time bomb. The small bird blew up sending Tobi flying across the room and landing in a pile of rubble that used to be the training room floor. Tobi groaned and sat up, “ Tobi hates you Deidara Sempai, now I’m not going to fix your balcony.” Tobi crossed his arms and stuck his nose in the air. Deidara just smirked again and made another small clay bird, letting it go once again. Tobi shrieked and jumped up again running from another clay bird. Deidara started to walk down the hallway chuckling and counted out loud, “5...4...3...2...1...boom.”

Tobi started to get bored just sitting here, so he decided to join. He pounced up on his two left feet and started to prance around the lair in search for something pretty to throw. He stopped prancing in front of Leader-sama's door. On the door, it had a note:

Off-limits to anyone other than me, Leader-sama and Konan-san.

Do not enter.

Explosives and harmful equipment inside.

Again, do NOT enter.

That means you Tobi-san.


Tobi didn't know how to read so he mistaked it for this:

Off-limits to only me, Leader-sama.

Please enter.

Chocolate cake and icecream inside.

Again, please enter.

That means you Tobi-san.


'Only 3 more naming ceremonies! Then I get to feed them and stuff!' She picked up a strange looking cat. Freaky too. The cat has a bunch of stitches around his body. Leg. Arm. Neck. Tail. Nose. WEINER!. This cat is starting to look like Michael Jackson!. 'That's it!' Sakura gleamed at her naming speed. "You're going to be called, Michael Jackson!" Michael Jackson fell face forward, on the ground. He stopped moving. Sakura poked him. Nothing. 'I guess he's so excited about the name, he fainted! I make myself proud!' She brushed Michael Jackson back between Toilet Paper and a violet haired one. Every cat stared at Sakura. Was she an idiot or what?

And to everyone’s surprise, Sasuke came up to Sakura and looked the Kyuubi straight in the eye. “Naruto!” he growled. “Get you hyperactive ass back down to earth.” He demanded. A smile spread on my face.

POOF Kakashi had finally made it.

“Yo, sorry I’m late, I had too…

“Kakashi we don’t care, too tired to care” said Naruto(HAHA)

Sakura: I can’t believe you Suki0

Me: are you still mad?

Sakura: no

Me: then why is your face all red? HOLY SHIT!! Where did you get a shot gun! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES Sakuzilla is in the attack!!Deidara go go go!! You to camera guy!! Quick turn it off!! HOLY CRAP!! End(This is the ending credits for a fanfic, btw)

Sakura was needless to say, bored out of her mind, not to mention the giant headache she was getting from inner Sakura’s rantings about how boring the trip was. Sighing, she decided to annoy the Uchiha. An evil grin made its way onto her face. “Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo….hows it going weasel-kun?” she asked. Kisame nearly choked on his own tongue. Itachi twitched and sent her a death glare. She ignored it. “Weasel-kun, why were you named after a weasel? You don’t seem the type to like weasels, but don’t worry I like weasels. Once I saw this weasel on the road and took it in. My mum screamed when she saw it of course but I managed to persuade her to let me keep it until it recovered. He was my temporary pet weasel. You know what I named him? I named him weasel-kun as well! Maybe you should be weasel-kun junior seeing as how you came second, no one can ever replace my first weasel-kun!” she grinned. Yep. Itachi was now visibly, continuously, uncontrollably twitching now, and Kisame was roaring with laughter at his partners expense. “Did I say something wrong weasel-kun?” Sakura asked all too innocently. More death glares which she happily replied to with talks about Rainbow Mountains and cookie stealing unicorns. Itachi, was not only irritated by now, but slowly questioning her sanity.

Hokage Tower

Sakura stood in Tsunade’s office after she had left the southern prison a half an hour before looking at the Hokage as she lay passed out on her desk.

“Tsunade-shishou,” Sakura said twitching.

No response.

“Tsunade-shishou,” She said a little louder.

No response.

“Tsunade-shishou!” Sakura yelled, “Orochimaru is here!”

“W-w-what?!” Tsunade yelled bolting upright, “Where is that bastard! I’ll kill him!”

“Orochimaru isn’t here…” Sakura said sweat dropping.

“H-huh?” Tsunade said snapping out of it, “Ahem, Sakura, what brings you here?”

“You called me here…” Sakura said sweat dropping again.

“Kakashi-san,” Neji’s smooth voice spoke from next to him, “What’s troubling you?”

“I’m worried about Sakura-chan,” He said monotonously.

“I could check on her if you’d like,” Neji said.

“No, don’t disturb her rest,” Kakashi said shaking his head.

“I wasn’t saying I’d go over there,” Neji said, “I have other ways of knowing what’s on the other side of a wall.”

“Would you?” Kakashi asked.

“Certainly,” Neji said and made a hand seal, “Byakugan.”

The Byakugan was activated for a grand total of about three seconds; in which time Neji’s eyes widened considerably, and a small blush stained his cheeks. As soon as the Byakugan disappeared he turned to Kakashi with his face as emotionless as possible.

“S-Sakura-chan is quite alright,” Neji said quickly.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow, but Neji was already back in bed with the covers over his head before he could question him. Kakashi could have sworn he heard him mutter “My eyes, oh Kami, my eyes!”

Naruto jumped. "SHIKAMARU! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?!" Shikamaru shrugged. "My mom's stomach, I guess." "But where do they come from?" "Well, you see, when a mommy and a daddy love each other so much they-"

Sakura fell on hard, cold pavement. "Ow! I think I just broke my spine!" (A/N: wow, i like this sentence!)

Naruto was the only one who didn't sigh. (Kakashi didn't either but that's because he was "reading") The blonde nin said, "What's a mall?" Sasuke responded. "An evil place where boys are slaves." (A/N: Aw. Come on, Sasuke. It's not that bad!)

Women..." Inuyasha muttered under his breath. Unfortuneately for Inuyasha, Kagome heard that. And she started yelling, "SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SSSSSSIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTT!" Everyone stared down the huge twenty foot hole in the ground where Inuyasha was once standing. "Hm!" Kagome crossed her arms over her chest and went in the mall. (A/N: oooo! BURN INUYASHA!) "Who knew the word 'sit' could do that?" Shikamaru said. After helping Inuyasha out of the hole, the rest of the peoples followed Kagome.

Three portals opened up on the ceiling of the mall. Everyone was getting prepared to fight whatever was going to come out of those portals, when Naruto started jumping around. Shippo saw this and asked, "What's wrong?" "I have to go to the bathroom!" Naruto replied jumping around even more. "Now?!" Kagome yelled at the blonde nin. Naruto nodded. "Can't you hold it or something?" Sasuke said annoyed. "No!" Naruto yelled. "But you didn't drink anything." Kairi said. "That's true." Namine added. "All you ate was ramen." Naruto shook his head. "Sora thought it would be funny to put hot sauce in one of my bowls of ramen when I wasn't looking. When I started eating, I noticed something different. But it was too late. My mouth was on fire, so I drank twenty gallons of water from the nearest toilet." Sakura sighed. "Boys..." Sango nodded.

"I CAN'T HOLD IT ANYMORE!!" Naruto yelled all of a sudden and ran into the girls' bathroom. The other people in the mall, you know, the normal ones, started moving again. "Quick," Kagome said to the others. "Let's get Kairi out of here." They were all about to leave when they heard a scream from the girls' bathroom and then Naruto yelling, "Look, I'm sorry! I didn't know anyone was in that stall! If it helps, you have really cute underwear!" Then they all heard someone get slapped.

Sakura snickered. “That’s nothing. I almost gave her a heart attack once. I went to the drug store and bought a bunch of condoms and in the middle of her lesson started throwing them around singing “No glove no love” Sakura said. “She had me in detention for like a week” Sakura added.

“NEJI WE’RE HERE!!” Sang a blond haired boy with spiky hair and cerulean eyes, olive skin, in neon blue kaki shots, and a neon range t-shirt, in bright blue words read, Ramen shall rule this earth, you puny mortals!!

Well, my hair is naturally pink, err…I’m blind, I love explosions, people, black, animals, although I prefer dogs, I’m a pyromaniac, I like reading, art physical contact sorts, explosions and fire…I dislike a lot of things like the color pink and sluts…AND I HAVE A SPLIT PERSONALITY! Hmmm…..OH YEAH! I GET HIGH OFF OF SURGAR! HAHAHA AND I WANT TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AND THE BUNNIES WILL KILL US ALL, ALL OF US UNLESS YOU JOIN THE THERE SIDE, THE DARK SIDE, CUZ THEY HAVE FRESH BAKED CHOCLATE CHIP COOKIES! BUWAHAHAHAHA!” Everyone paled a bit.

“Naruto-Kun, I think we’ve gone over a cliff cartoon style." They turned back to see Neko. Waving. Waving. That cat was the spawn of the fucking devil. They went right into the icy river.

A/N: Wow this was hilarious at least I thought so…I love the, “Its smirking at us!”


Naruto Male Cat Babysitters: (glares)

Neko: (smirks)

Me: Wow I created a monster,

Deidara: (starts chainsaw up) oh GOTHIC PETALS, UN, LOOKIE HERE!Me: (gulps)err….bye bye,

(The Next are from Harry Potter/ Naruto fanfics.)

The next moment, Naruto was thrown back from the strong force of the sudden jet of water which erupted from the tip of the wand. He flew past Sakura, who made a last minute grab for his shirt, but missed by a hair, and then Neji and Sasuke, who didn’t bother to do anything to stop his blonde team mate from crashing into anything. Kakashi took a casual and lazy step to the side, allowing Naruto to crash head on onto the glass window. Glass shards exploded onto the street outside after Naruto’s figure. Several screams could be heard

The first had caused a hail storm, the second had conjured up a man eating plant, which took Sakura to wrestle it to the ground with her inhuman strength before Neji could free himself from the plant and banish it. The third caused an explosion in the ground right below Naruto, causing him to be blasted into the air and create a hole in the ceiling. The fourth left a decent amount of slimy, green goo hanging from the ceiling, walls and windows, and dripping from the five shinobi and Mr Ollivander. The fifth had caused Naruto’s pants to catch fire, earning a girlish and un-Naruto-like scream from him. The sixth had caused a really bad hair day, well, for Neji and Sakura. All it took for Naruto and Sasuke was a shake of their head and their hair would fall back to its original style, much to Sakura’s and Neji’s chagrin. The seventh summoned a murderous ghoul into the room, causing Sakura to scream her head off.

I am the Sorting Hat and I shall be reading your mind to see which house you’re suitable in,” a bored voice suddenly said in Naruto head. It was apparent that the Hat had memorized those lines.

“The teacher teaching us is an old fraud, can’t even predict the weather,” said Ron, staring at Sakura as she took a bite of her toast. “And she has a thing for predicting my death,” muttered Harry, frowning at the thought. “Well, I’m sure she isn’t that bad…” Sakura trailed off. “She’s been predicting my death for the past year.” “Oh.”

“And why would we want to raise them?” said a cold voice. The Slytherins had arrived. The speaker was none other than Draco Malfoy, the ‘stupid blond git which makes Naruto look like a freaking civilized chimp’, as quoted from Sasuke.

“How’d you like it if I did this to your hair, huh?” Sakura reached forward and ruffled Sasuke’s hair. The laughter slid off his handsome face and he mocked a growl at Sakura, who in turn clutched her stomach from laughing to hard. Sasuke’s expression was priceless. So was his hair. Sakura was laughing so hard that she almost fell off her broom. “Careful, woman. You’re the medic here,” said Sasuke, supporting Sakura by holding her elbow as she tried to balance herself again. Sakura stuck out her tongue at him again. “Tch. Annoying.” “WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME, JERK?!” “Annoying, Haruno.” “AT LEAST I’M NOT THE ONE WITH THE CHICKEN BUTT HAIR, BASTARD!!” “Chic – What did you just call my hair.” “CHICKEN BUTT HAIR, JERK-OFF!!” “You so did not just say that.” “SO WHAT IF I DI - !! Oh shit, run – I mean, FLY!!”

“By the way, you’re Neji Hyuuga, right?” asked Fred abruptly, interrupting the ninjas’ glares at Naruto, who breathed out a sigh of relief. “Yes,” replied Neji monotonously. “Well, I’ve always been wondering, how’d you get your hair to grow that long and walk around still looking like a man?” Harry Potter gave in to the urge to smack his own scarred forehead.

Sasuke stared at her for a while, looking slightly startled. Then he smiled. He freaking smiled. As in, smiled. Not smirk. Smile. Uchiha Sasuke smiling. Someone pass me the camera!! “Yeah. You, too, Sakura.” And that, was like another kiss to the cheek by Uchiha Sasuke

“I really… really… can’t dance, Sasuke.” “You’re doing… well enough.” Wince. “I’m telling you - I think I just stepped on something.” “Ow. Damn. You weren’t kidding when you said you couldn’t dance.” Glare. “How do you even walk in those heels?” “I truly have no idea.” “It looks painful.” “It packs a good kick.” Twitch. “You okay, Sasuke?” Sigh. “Sakura. Just stand on my feet.” She obliged. “OW! Not like that – ah yes… Jeez, I think I broke a bone.” Sakura glared at him, though it was hard, when he was looking so gorgeous. It would have been more natural to ogle.

Disclaimer : I don’t own Naruto, Well even if I don’t have a razor is still have my über-ninja skills I’ll just I’ll just shove a Rasengan down my throat that’ll seriously mess up my intestines. Well here goes nothing “ RASENGAN! Huh? RASENGAN! WTF!? RASENGAN! Oh shit I forgot I’m not Naruto’tebayyOO00oo. . .hit with sedative and carried by with big men in white clothes.( Not mine, but it's freaking funny)

“What are we, chopped liver?” Kiba muttered. “Dog liver,” Ino corrected. The Inuzuka shuddered. Bleugh

Neji didn't need his Byakugan to tell that it was indeed, a cup. And a sake cup, none the less. He also didn't need his Byakugan to tell that his Hokage was an insufferable drunkard. “Hokage-sama, um... it's a cup.” “Yes, I know that, Lee. But it’s a magic cup.” “Oh, I see!” No, he didn't.

"Uhehehe...Sorry guys! Well Suki these are my other friends. Sasuke Uchiha, Neji Hyuuga, Naruto Uzumaki, & Shikamaru Nara!!" said Sakura. Both Neji and Sasuke just nodded to Suki while Shikamaru said a lazy 'Hello'. Naruto hugged Suki and kept on rammbling about ramen and who he was. At this the others sweatdropped. (A/N: hehehe kinda funny) Sakura then got a bit ticked off and grabed Naruto by the ear and dragged him to the living room. Next thing you hear is...


Sakura then walked back to the others with a smile plastered on her face. After she walked in, Naruto came in with many bruises and bumps. Hinata ran to him and helped him up a bit. The others just laughed at him.

You love your brothers and you love to be powerful. "GRI—" You stick me in there with them and I'll tear you to tiny pieces on stage and use you for toilet paper! The Sand Siblings stick together! "..." There was a brief silence. "SLYTHERIN!" Temari skipped to Gaara's side. Kankurou walked onto the stage. "SLYTHERIN!" He didn't even put on the hat yet...! Kankurou shrugged. Oh well, to put on the hat, he would have to take off his own. And that would take so much longer on the stage. He felt so self-conscious without his makeup—erm, face paint. He had forgotten to put it on beforehand.

Oh, hey, do you have the stuff?" Naruto asked."Not yet, kid," Fred said with a grin. "You want our masterpiece, you gotta wait. We'll finish it three weeks tops. We've never experimented with anything quite like this." "What stuff?" Temari asked them. "Ah... I gave Fred and George a few samples of..." "Of what?" Shikamaru asked, feeling a sudden sense of profound trepidation. "Er, explosion tags..." "WHAT!" Shikamaru and Temari's horrified cries were heard throughout the entire school. Naruto left the infirmary later that day looking cross. It was too troublesome for Shikamaru to hit Naruto, and Temari never hit anyone so hard that they'd be knocked out. None of the shinobi anyway. But when she took out her fan and hit it across his head (a reaction to her horror), he tried to jump out of the way and landed on Temari's...on Temari. First Temari hit him, and then Shikamaru's shadow tried to strangle him! And not only that, but when Naruto tried to run away, he tripped and set off his own smoke bomb, throwing all of the Great Hall into chaos. Blinded by smoke, Naruto ran into the wall and knocked himself unconscious. Thus he was sent to the infirmary.

"Thank you, I try," Ino said pleasantly to him. "And I know, Lee's going to be hard—" "You guys are so mean…" "—but I'll fix him a little bit." ………… The room was silent. Even the normal Gryffindors didn't say anything as they heard Ino say this."What?" Lee asked."Deal!" Naruto said enthusiastically. "What?""Wow," Kiba said. "I wanna see this.""What?""This might be interesting," Chouji said, feeling remotely sorry for Lee."What?""Ano…I don't think Lee is very enthusiastic about this…""What?" Lee couldn't understand what was going on. Fix him? Was he broken? He had a bad feeling about this…

"I'm leaving too, so I can't go. Kankurou's on bad term with that Malfoy kid, so that's that. Shino doesn't talk and I'm sure all of the Slytherins would prefer a brick wall, as it could keep up a conversation better. And Sasuke seems to be gynephobic," Temari said. "What's that?" Kankurou asked. "It means I'm scared of women," Sasuke said. Wait... "I mean, I'm not! That's what Temari said, but I'm not!" "Riiiiight," Kankurou said, laughing at Sasuke, who threatened to kill him as usual.

Malfoy was about to say something else when a dark blur rushed pass him. Soon after that, Malfoy was trampled by a horde of fangirls—Slytherin, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Gryffindor alike. "You can never actually see Sasuke when he's running away, yet somehow you can always tell when he's coming," Chouji commented as Sasuke threw down a ball and disappeared from his fangirls. Ino suddenly towered over the girls in anger. "YOU LEAVE MY SASUKE-KUN ALONE!" she snarled with little bits of sparks seeming to come out of her eyes. The girls ran away. Sasuke left from his cover behind Chouji and sighed.

They can't really be considered a harem because they aren't girls. They're monsters, hiding behind an inch thick mask of make-up with a poison called perfume and an affinity for dolls. You wouldn't happen to be a one of them, would you?"Equation- Makeup + Perfume + Dolls: Fanclub Monster Equation- "Face paint" + Poison + "Puppets" : Kankurou((Hm...see any odd similarities?)) "I'm NOT wearing makeup, I DON'T wear perfume, and these are NOT DOLLS!" Kankurou shouted, attracting attention of the Sasuke-patrol. "There he is!" someone cried as a whole pack of them ran at them. Kankurou and Sasuke, stuck between a rock and a hard place, backed away against the stone walls. "He's over here with...KANKUROU!" They gasped simultaneously. "Please don't kill us!" "Shit!" some guy said. "H-hey Kankurou, we didn't do anything yet...!" "Please don't kill us!" "W-we j-j-just where g-going t-to t-t-t-talk to S-Sasuke..." "Please don't kill us!" Kankurou had a feeling his fun with Sasuke's head had just about ended. "Go ahead and bother Sasuke, it's fine with—"

"A book," Kiba said bluntly. "On ninjas. They do KARATE and KUNG FU! They also spend their free time cutting off people's heads, but sometimes they fly. A hobby of theirs." He smiled. He grinned. And then he collapsed on the floor laughing.

Akamaru peed on Ms. Norris.(HAHA)

Where to first?" Naruto asked. "Cosmetics store," Gaara said. "Kankurou goes to a cosmetics store and he still says it's not makeup?" Shikamaru asked. "Yes..." "He's in denial," Temari said, shaking her head sadly.

"Well, it is a bit hard to tell whether you're serious or not," Temari said, prodding the sleeping woman's leg. "Remember when you threatened Kankurou with death when you said that you wanted decaf but you were joking? That idiot brother ran halfway across the Wind Country 'til you dragged him back and told him you were just playing. I swear..." She shook her head and they all laughed. Even Gaara smiled. And then he remembered his dignity and it disappeared.

Sasuke opened the box to find... a plaid tablecloth. "..." He read the card in it. OWNED! --The Great Uzumaki Naruto! XD (just kidding, don't hit me when I come back...) He lifted the table cloth and nearly sighed out loud in relief. "I thought he was serious," Sasuke muttered, picking up his dark blue hakama. He looked at Ino and the fangirls watching him in the Great Hall. Hermione frowned when she heard him whisper to In, "Meet me in the girl's bathroom later. There's something you should see, but don't bring good clothes."

“NARUTO!” Mizu’s eyes widened. “Mizu! Mizu!” Kairen wiggled in the hand. “Kairen! What’s wrong!? Is it getting tighter?!” “I’ve concluded something…” Kairen looked at her ominously. “What…” “..I think Shukaku… is gay!” Kairen’s eyes widened. “….DAMN IT, KAIREN! SHUKAKU REALLY IS MAKING YOU NUTS! I’M GETTING YOU OUT OF THERE!” - From NinjaNinjaNinja!

“Hey…hic Sasuke! I’m a ninja!” Naruto yelled falling out of a tree. “That’s great hic dobe. And I am an emo know-it-all! Woo!” Sasuke said. Sakura was in the background, taking video. “Mwahaha.” She whispered. “We’re ninja! Look at our shiny weapons!” They yelled falling over a cliff. “Hey Tsunade. Sasuke and Naruto took your sake.” Sakura said telling her teacher when she went to her office. Next thing she knew, both Naruto and Sasuke were in the hospital. “It didn’t help that you showed the whole village that video.” Naruto said rubbing the back of his neck. “It made everyone laugh…even Sai! And he’s emotionless!” Sakura exclaimed. “Haha.” Naruto grumbled.

Hn?” Sasuke replied, meaning “What?” In ice block language, or Naruto calls it, Bastard language. “Quit with the Bastard language.” Sakura said as she glanced annoyingly at the raven haired boy. ‘She’s been hanging around Naruto to long.’ Sasuke thought as he huffed and turned away.

The mirror had fogged up and Sasuke began to wipe it away until he could see clearly. The Uchiha looked at his wet hair and began to blow dry it until his hair was no longer wet. (OMG!! SASUKE OWNS A BLOWDRYER!?)

(Naruto + Orochimaru...: who?) Naruto made a face at the thought: a blond guy with a whiskers, a funny tongue, and a stretchable neck... Hm... Naruchimaru!

"Well, Mister Voldemort, may I asked you a question?" "Don't ask if you're going to do it anyway," the angry voice said. "Okay. Who—no, what the hell were your parents?" "..." No one really knew what to say after that. (HAHA)

“Bakuretsu Koinu – (Exploding Puppy)”(OMG! KIBA HAS A PUPPY KILLING JUTSU! ANIMAL CRUELTY!)

"Holy rusted metal batman" - Robin from Batman Forever

"Holy crap you guys are retarded" - Joker from an old Batman movie

"You’re Crazy"
"If I wasn't this would probably never work" -Jack Sparrow

Teen Commandments

1. Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
(Why wait that long)

2. Thou shall not do drugs.
(Alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.)

3. Thou shall not steal from K-Mart.
(Wal-Mart has a bigger selection)

4. Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism.
(Destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this)

5. Thou shall not steal from your parents.
(Everyone knows grandma has more money)

6. Thou shall not get into fights.
(Cat fight anyhow...just starts them.)

7. Thou shall not skip class.
(Just take the whole day off)

8. Thou shall not wear revealing clothes in class.
(Hooters pay more)

9. Thou shall not think about having sex.
(Like Nike says, "just do it")

10. Thou shall not help old ladies across the street.
(Just leave 'em in the middle)

/I believe that/

~Oroichmaru is one (or more)~

.of the following:.

1. Micheal Jackson's Twin

2. A Crazy Pedophile Who Wants To Take Over the World with His Little Boy Servants

3. A Former Gay Stripper Who Lost His Touch (not that I have anything against gays/lesbians)

4. Someone's Former, Discarded Sex Toy

5.The Human Reincarnation Of An Unlucky & Unfortunate Snake 'Demon' Who Wanted To Rule The World But Got Born Into The Body Of The Unluckiest Man On Earth

6. A Man Who Wanted To Be A Woman Who Got A Sex Change That Went Horribly Wrong (I don’t have anything against those ppl, by the way)

7. A Science Experiment Gone Horribly Wrong

8. An Evil Demon Who Likes To Eat the Bodies of Dead Little Boys (Especially Uchihas)

9. A sad reminder that a snake and human do not make a beautiful child.

10. The long-lost cousin of Voldemort

"SAVE THE FROGS!! picks up little frog and throws it" "You know I think you just killed it...""...SAVE THE FROGS!! picks up another frogs and throws it to the pond""T_T"-Me and my cousin (my cousin was the "frog saver")

"Ohayogozaimasu!" "STOP INSULTING US IN JAPANESE!" "I'm not insulting you! I'm saying good morning!"-T_T me with people in school...(Another Profile)

"Try it trash! I'll return the pain a thousand times over!"- Uzumaki Naruto

"I'm not JUST a pervert...I'm a SUPER-PERVERT!!"- Jiraya(O_O omg, run for the hills)

"SHANNARO!"- Haruno Sakura

"DATTEBAYO!" -Uzumaki Naruto

"FOR PONY!" - Richard from Looking for Group


"Naruto, it's nice that you removed the poison so spiritedly, but you'll bleed to death if you lose any more... seriously." - Hatake Kakashi

"Hello students, today I got lost on the road of life." - Hatake Kakashi

"My first impression of you is that I hate you." - Hatake Kakashi

"All I've been doing is watching you two from behind... now; get a good look at my back!" - Haruno Sakura(And the butt…..and …I’m not gonna say it T_T)

"All rugs hide something sinister, it’s a fact of life." - ME!

"I miss my muffin." - Gir from Invader Zim

"What I'm saying is, in the end, everyone is alone, right?" - TenTen

"There's no meaning to a flower unless it blooms." - Yamanaka Ino

"WHAT?! Why wasn't he affected by my sexiness?!"- Yamanaka Ino

"Those in the ninja world who break the rules and regulations are called filth, but those who don't care about their companions... are even lower than filth."- Uchiha Obito

"Konoha's hidden village secret taijutsu technique (sticks fingers in Naruto's butt) THOUSAND YEARS OF PAIN!" -Hatake Kakashi (Well……that’s a wrap. Poor Naruto)

" (When Naruto falls for an obvious trap and is struggling about. Kakashi is telling him that a ninja must see through deception) 'I get it I get it!'
' No, you don't get it, that’s why I'm telling you. You think you get it, which isn't the same as actually getting it. Get it?'"- Hatake Kakashi

"(angrily pointing at Yuki) Just like I'll beat you one of these days!
Yuki: (looking bored) Wait, wait, I think I've heard this one before!"- Yuki and Kyo Sohma

"Kyo Sohma: One of these days, I'll make you say you're sorry!
Yuki Sohma: (looking bored) I'm sorry.
Kyo Sohma: Dammit! That's not what I meant! Don't you have any shame?
Yuki Sohma: (still looking bored) Yes, I'm ashamed to be seen with you, shouting in public.
Kyo Sohma: Oh that's it! We're taking this outside!
Yuki Sohma: (still looking bored) we ARE outside, you stupid cat."- Yuki and Kyo Sohma

"Ayame: (clasping Yuki's hands) Yuki, let's deepen the bond between us brothers!
Yuki Sohma: (annoyed) before you can do that I'll drown you in the deepest part of that lake.
Ayame: That's right! No matter what happens we'll be together.
Yuki Sohma: I'll let you drown alone!" - Yuki and Ayame Sohma

"Hatsuharu Sohma: (after tripping Kyo) If I hadn't had tripped you, you wouldn't have stopped now would you.
(Addressing the audience)
Hatsuharu Sohma: By the way what I just did was very dangerous. And if it had been anyone but Kyo they probably would have been hurt pretty badly, so don't try it at home.
Kyo Sohma: Don't try it here! and who are you even talking to?"- Hatsu and Kyo Sohma (OMG THEY SMASHED THE FOURTH WALL!)

Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. The boys don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the grounds that aren’t as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have towait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree

Sakura: Do I ever cross your mind?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Do you like me?
Sasuke: Not really
Sakura: Do you want me?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Would you cry if I left?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Would you live for me?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Would you do anything for me?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Choose--me or your life?
Sasuke: My life
Sakura runs away in shock and pain and Sasuke runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life

Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school
He told his friends that it was cool
And when he pulled the trigger back
It shot with a great crack
Mummy I was a good girl
I did what I was told
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold
But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye
I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry
When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another
And all because he got the gun from his older brother
Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much
And please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush
And tell my little sister that she is the only one now
And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best
Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest
Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class
And never to forget this and please don't let this pass
Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this
Mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss
And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try
I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry
Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest
But mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest
Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack
Mummy listen to me if you would
I wanted to go to college
I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with daddy
On that trip to the new zoo
I wanted to get married
I wanted to have a kid
I wanted to be an actress
Mummy I wanted to live
But mummy I must go now
The time is getting late
Mummy tell my Chris
I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date
I love you mummy I always have
I know you know it's true
Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you"
In memory of the Columbian students that were lost
Please if you would
Pass this around
I'd be happy if you could
Don't smash this on the ground
If you pass this on
Maybe people will cry
Just keep this in heart
For the people that didn't get to say "goodbye"

With a stoplight, Green means Go, Yellow means Slow, and Red means Stop. But with bananas, it's very different. Yellow means Go, Green means Whoa Slow Down, and Red means Where the Hell Did You Get A Red Banana?!

Come join the dark side we have cookies!

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.


8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98 percent

11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96 percent

A-T-T-I -T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100 percent


2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103 percent

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118 percent

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while HARDWORK and KNOWLEDGE will get you close, and ATTITUDE will get you there, it’s really the BULLSHIT and the ASSKISSING that will put you over the top.

If you've read my full profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Crimson Smiles by MissLunaTick reviews
Alucard was sipping on a bag of blood as if he were sipping on a soda at the movies, his legs draped over the seats ahead of him. "Done already? I was hoping there would be an encore." He looked over to her, a sinister grin on both their lips.
Hellsing - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 29 - Words: 227,080 - Reviews: 155 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 138 - Updated: 12/27/2015 - Published: 6/28/2008 - Alucard, OC
The Light in the Darkness by PokemonHero reviews
Amber was living an average life. Until she was turned into Eevee. Now she must learn to survive in her new form. Will she ever find a way to become a human again? What about her new friend, an Absol named Soru? Find out.
Pokémon - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 14 - Words: 44,238 - Reviews: 389 - Favs: 414 - Follows: 393 - Updated: 8/20/2012 - Published: 11/4/2008 - Eevee/Eievui, Absol
Alucard by FaeryTale Faever reviews
Integra Hellsing is a lonely young girl who lives with her father in a reclusive castle in Transylvania; however, a carriage accident outside her home brings an unexpected friend into the family's care, a beautiful and mysterious girl: Alucard. (One more chapter)
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 41,152 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 12/10/2010 - Published: 3/28/2009 - Alucard, Integra
Those whom we do not wish to Remember by TheLittleLillith reviews
Alucard will never be over his lost love Mina. But when he stops a hoard of ghouls and saves a young woman who insists she knows him and looks identical to his lost love will he try and bring her back from the dead?
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 21 - Words: 40,188 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 12/1/2010 - Published: 12/7/2008
Vampire Heart by claymaker reviews
Alucard finds himself in an awkward situation. An American girl has unknowingly brought upon a curse that links them together, with her able to command him. Surely He hates the girl, but cannot understand why he feels drawn to her as well.AL/OC Ch.29up!
Hellsing - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 29 - Words: 169,254 - Reviews: 290 - Favs: 377 - Follows: 153 - Updated: 1/8/2010 - Published: 5/1/2009 - Alucard - Complete
Melody of Cherryblossoms by Gaara-funk-girl452 reviews
Sakura meets this silver head man that was part of the Akatsuki,oh yeah it was Hidan.After a couple of days she's beginning to really like him. Being kicked out of Konoha,Sakura has no where to go but to Akatsuki. HidanXSakura PeinXSakura *EXTREME LEMON
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 31,156 - Reviews: 204 - Favs: 154 - Follows: 75 - Updated: 12/26/2009 - Published: 6/3/2009 - Sakura H., Hidan - Complete
Black and White by AmyC103 reviews
It should be black and white.Two very different things. Their love was never ment to be,yet it is.It's there and they are fighting for it.Praying the other "kind" wont get involved. He is willing to do anything to keep her. She the same. VampireFic GaaSak
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 31 - Words: 96,135 - Reviews: 259 - Favs: 160 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 12/12/2009 - Published: 3/9/2009 - Gaara, Sakura H. - Complete
Highschool sucksVampires? by Intoxicatingxbloodxlust reviews
Sakura is a new student going to Konoha high,soon to find new friends and new enemies.Soon to find out that Konoha High are ruled by the Akatsuki,a group of vampires.Every student already knows but they don't know what else is among the Akatsuki vampires.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,507 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 8/22/2009 - Published: 7/17/2009 - Sakura H., Akatsuki
How to Get a Date by Nightmares Walk reviews
Pip is low on cash and he wants more. Instead of driving the rates up on Integra, he decides to make a movie on how to get a date, thinking himself a ladies' man. With the help of his cameraman, he's in business. Rated T for language and pervetedness.
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 5,729 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 8/15/2009 - Published: 1/11/2009 - Pip, Seras
Haunting by Alucard's Annoying Friend reviews
Helena has to get out of london and now! Luckly for her the Valentine Brothers are here to help....or wil they? Alucard/oc
Hellsing - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 0 - Words: 1,451 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 8/4/2009 - Published: 7/19/2009 - Alucard
Loving the Boogeyman by Altocat reviews
Her love has no limits...and he does not know why.
Batman - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 605 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/13/2009 - The Joker, Harley Quinn - Complete
The Mating Frenzy by MSkyDragons reviews
After the attacks by Orochimaru and the Sand, Konoha’s population is dangerously low. Desperate times call for extreme measures, and Tsunade issues a priority S class mission to every Leaf ninja: to pair off and start making babies!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 33 - Words: 70,171 - Reviews: 7209 - Favs: 5,878 - Follows: 2,472 - Updated: 11/22/2007 - Published: 7/24/2006 - Naruto U. - Complete
Something More by HikariNakahara reviews
Set after the movie. Jack and Sally have a daughter and she is just like Jack. She dreams of something more. Of a world not over run by ghouls and ghosts but what if evil stood in the way and endangered her family. Well, what would you do?
Nightmare Before Christmas - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,744 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 5 - Published: 10/21/2006 - Jack S.
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Love is Not Just About Dying Inside reviews
What if Voldemort had a reason why he was evil, what if he had someone to love. and what if Harry was wrong when he said the Tom riddle will never love again?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,148 - Reviews: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 4/5/2010 - Published: 4/4/2010 - Tom R. Jr., Voldemort
The Gril who loved the shadows
With Alucard and his family living to go back home,Luna sent away with her mother before the things kid could get her And now after a few years Lunas heading home, well her aunts home.And when she gets there guess who waiting for her?
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 843 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/18/2010 - Alucard
Funny little things reviews
November White, is a normle girl whos father moves to Tokyo,all the girls hate her and want her to go away,Her siblings are annyoing and then one day she climbs a rock to help her brother and finds shes in InuHiroshi and his son Sesshomaru land.RR plz
Inuyasha - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,039 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/5/2010 - Published: 7/13/2009 - Sesshōmaru
The Thief in the rain village reviews
Kayoko is a 18 year old Thief ,well ninja Thief untell she run into Diedara. Diedara/OC
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Crime/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 613 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/20/2009 - Deidara