JaspersNumberOneLover
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Joined 07-12-09, id: 2005052, Profile Updated: 07-06-10
Author has written 3 stories for Twilight.

im never on this just soo ever1 knows i love to read them but suck at righting them my favroite story are by dark skinned angel she the bomb i ahve a fb *pm* me for the deets to see me :) aha look at me acting all cool and awesome

other stuff

:im thirteen short and have brown hair but im a natural blond so i kinda have streeks in mii hair

im currently a strait A student at springton lake middle school and am a field hockey player mii postion is sweeper im number 11

iI’ve lived in Austin Texas forks Washington Miami Florida, and current live in media pa so ive been to four states all in different time zones

If you want to be Mrs.Cullen DON'T copy this! His mine!So,back off


holy CRAP You guys have to read these!

I can't believe that Twilight fans could be so..., mean. Attempting to slit somebodies throat because they hated Twilight?

If you're a SANE Twilight Fan, copy and paste to your profile.

This is about abortion...

Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine, but I will have a lot of it
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus' arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak

im soooooo happy i didnt do it and i acutally thought about it

Copy n' past

If you have considered

naming your kids Edward,

Bella, Alice, Jasper,

Emmett, Rosalie,

Carlisle, or Esme,

copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are so obsessed with

Twilight that it is NOT even funny

anymore, copy this onto your profile.

If you think vampires are

real and you want to join them,

copy this onto your profile.

If people think you are

mentally insane,

copy and paste this onto your profile

You know it's gonna

be a bad day when you fall out of bed

and miss the floor.

If you have ever just wanted

to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile

If you're random and proud of it,

copy and paste this in your profile!

If you've ever walked into a

doorway that you could've

clearly dodged, you just

weren't paying close enough

attention, copy and paste this

on your profile.

(I can't help if I walk in to bright red things)

My best friend is insane,

if you agree or if you

have an insane friend then

copy this to your profile

If you've ever burst out laughing

in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

If you are absolutely in love

with Stephenie Meyer's fictional

character Edward, from Twilight,

copy and paste this into your profile.

(I will find him one of these days)

If you hear voices of the

characters in your head...

copy and paste this on

your profile

(I'm not crazy...but Jasper says Hi!)

If you love rain,

copy and paste this

into your profile.(Who doesn't love rain?)

If there are times where you just

wanna annoy someone

for the heck of it copy this into your profile

If you ever felt like killing someone

(or more than one person)

because they wouldn't leave you

alone when you told them

not to distract you because

you were busy copy this into

your profile.(They

wouldn't listen!!all they had to do

was shut up!)

If you've ever asked a really stupid,

obvious question,

copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever forgotten

what you were talking about in

a conversation copy and

paste this into your profile.

Chocolate chip cookies are the best!!

If you agree,

copy and paste this into your profile!!

If you belive there is

and Edward Cullen and

you are going to find him,

copy and paste theis to your profile

Find a guy whos calls you beautiful instead of hot,

Who calls you back when you hang up on him,

Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,

Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats,

Who holds your hand in public and in front of his friends and family.

Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he loves you and how lucky he is to have you.

If you think that describes Edward Cullen, copy it into your profile.

If you have ever dreamed or wished that a book character was real (Edward!) copy and paste this in your profile.

IF YOU LOVE EDWARD CULLEN, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE AND SCREAM!

If you want Bella to turn into a vampire, copy this into your profile.

If you hear voices of the Twilight characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you think that losers hate/don't get Twilight, copy this into your profile

If you are counting the days until Breaking Dawn comes out copy and paste this into your profile

If you're a proud stalker and obsessed love-struck fan-girl of Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, copy this into your profile

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever spazzed out when you've seen a silver Volvo S60, because it reminds you of Edward Cullen, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are so obsessed with Twilight it isn't even funny anymore, copy this into your profile.

If you think Aro acts like a creepy camp counciler, copy and paste this into your profile.

"REMEMBER WHEN"

REMEMBER WHEN ..
getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?
'm 0 m' (was your hero)
and when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings
and rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?

Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now

A Twilight Survey

Which book in the series is your favorite?

dont make me pick

How long did it take you to read the books?

42 hours

Who introduced you to the books?

i liked the cover and said why not read them

Did you buy them, borrow them, or have them given to you as a gift?

I bought them

Are you most looking forward to: Breaking Dawn, Midnight Sun, or the movie?

Uh...they have all occurred, although I guess the completion of Midnight Sun would be okay!

What's your dream ending to the series?

Edward and Alice die in some other crazy Volturi-styled battle and Jasper and Bella seek comfort in one another...and they proceed to have glorious, mind-blowing sex for eternity...with a chapter for each time they have sex for us avid Jasper/Bella voyeurs!

Favorites: Who is your favorite character?

Jasper until the end of time

Who's your favorite vampire?

Jasper until the end of time

Who is your favorite werewolf?

seth he sound really caring and thats really cute to me

What's one of your favorite quotes from the stories?

theres an alfaw lot of headborad left

What was your favorite Bella and Edward moment?
new moon just becase it has a lot of love in it

What was your favorite Bella and Jacob moment?

When Jacob is keeping Bella warm in the tent during Eclipse, and Edward is having a mind-melt...hahaha!

How about your favorite Bella and Alice moment?

When Alice returns in New Moon.

What was your favorite adventure/battle?

I think I might be the only one who actually liked the battle with the Volturi...except for the fact that the one person who should have been there (Jasper) wasn't...Christ! For all the "warrior" talk SM did about Jasper, you'd think he could have at least been given the ability to showcase his fine ass around that field!

Which book cover was your favorite?

Breaking Dawn

Are these books among your favorite books of all?
yes why would they not be


Twilight Oath

I promise to remember Bella

Each time I carelessly fall down

And I promise to remember Edward

Whenever I'm out of town

I promise to obey traffic laws

For Charlies sake of course

And I promise to remember Jacob

When my heart fills with remorse

I promise to remember Carlisle

Whenever I am in the emergency room

And I promise to remember Emmett

Everytime there's a huge boom

I promise to to remember Rose

Whenever I see something that holds pure beauty

And I promise to remember Alice

When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me

I promise to remember Nessie

When I see that beautiful bronze hair

And I promise to remember Esme

When someone tells me they care

I promise to remember Jasper

Whenever my stomach isn't curled

And I promise to remember the Volturi

When someone speaks of dominating the world

Yes, I promise to love Twilight

Wherever I may go

So that all may see my obsession

Because I know what the Twilighters know



Friends:
You cry, I cry.
You fight, I fight.
You laugh, I laugh.
You jump off a bridge,
I get a paddle boat and save your retarded but!

You Say Camp Rock, I Say Twilight
You Say Nick Jonas, I Say Jasper Hale
You Say Nick And Selena, I Say Jazz And Alice
You Say Humans, I Say Vampires
You Say hot, I Say Cold
You Say Soccer, I Say Baseball
You Say Orange, I Say Apple
You Say Jonas, I Say Cullen
You say Twilight suckso.0 That Is Going Too Far Volturi are coming for you

Lessons learned in Twilight

1) You can enjoy the nagquet while resisting the wine.
2) The future is not set in stone
3) Men are crabby when they're hungry
4) Nothing beats an irritable grizzly bear
5) True love knows no boundaries
6) Some people are just danger magnets.
7) Even eternal enimies can work together to save something they love
8) Forget the fangs - Real vampires sparkle! (they're sexy to. coughEdwardcough)
9) Soul mates exist; even if it takes 100 years to find them.
10) Porshe 911 Turbos make really great bribes
11) Friendship is like the sun on a cloudy day
12) Snow just means it's too cold for rain.
13) Family is about more than just blood
14) What's worth doing is worth over-doing.
15) Losing you temper can be very... hair-raising...
16) "Vegetarian" has many meanings.
17) Even monsters can hold on to their humanity.
18) There are exceptions to every rule.
19) Always verify bad new before doing something stupid.
20) Hearing voices in your head doesn't necessarily mean you're crazy.
21) Love means being willing to scrifice your happiness for another's.
22) Cold hands = Warm heart.
23) Not breathing is uncomfortable... (I'm not even going to say anything.)
24) Stupid lambs and masochistic lions make quite a pair
25) Romeo was an idiot... But then that makes Edward and idiot to doesn't it? Ponder over that!
26) Twilight is the saddest and safest time of day.
27) Extreme sports should not be attempted alone.
28) Life is worth very little without someone to share it with.
29) Space heaters can be very annoying (coughJacobcough)
30) Love can make even the most miserable places paradise.

25 REASONS I OWE MY MOTHER

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next
week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you

Haha.

OCD - Obsessive Cullen Disorder- What are the symptoms?

1- You think of nothing but Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn all the time

2- You have a poster of any of the cast of Twilight

3- You have read the entire series more that 5 times

4- You have woken up in the middle of the night and not found yourself able to go back to sleep, so you read the entirety of New Moon and then really regretted at school the next day when you fell asleep in a maths lesson.

If you have done all these things, or 3 out of 4 then you like me have Obsessive Cullen Disorder, there is only one cure, you must totally give in to your Cullen obsession, then you may finally be rid of it, but hey lets face it i love being Cullen Obsessed and you should too. Honestly tis good fun.

BTW, I AM TEAM CULLEN, AS WELL AS TEAM EDWARD.

Oh, oh,oh,oh I have just thought of another total random funfact about myself, I am at total film buff. I have no idea why you need to know that, but here it is.

Hehe I just bought a Twilight T-shirt and it is sooooooo FITT. I'm never taking it off.

And for anyone who is ABSOLUTELY obsessed with the films as well as the books, does anyone when the UK premiere is because I MUST HAVE TICKETS, either that or i'm going be at the front of the crowd screaming for Rob Pattinson. If anyone knows about the premiere please tell me and i'll love you forever. If not i'm going to have to spend my entire life on the internet waiting for news, but hey.

had an awesome idea, i am sticking all my favorite Twi-quotes on here so the entire world can see my obsession XD:

1) "Your hair looks like a haystack, but i like it." - Edward Cullen, Twilight

2) "I punched a werewolf in the face." - Bella Swan, Eclipse

3) "Chill Bella" - Emmett Cullen, Breaking Dawn

4) "Mike, oh Mike, how will i go on?" - Bella Swan, Breaking Dawn

5) "I'd like to beat you dead" - Rosalie Hale, Breaking Dawn

6) "You want me to be all doom and gloom, or just shut up?" - Seth Clearwater, Breaking Dawn

7) "I'm no Alice, you're just predictable." - Seth Clearwater, Breaking Dawn

8) "I’m really glad Edward didn’t kill you. Everything’s so much more fun with you around." - Emmett Cullen, Eclipse

9) "Thank you, Captain Obvious." - Leah Clearwater, Breaking Dawn

10) "Despite my best efforts, I’ve seen you naked before – doesn’t do much for me, so no worries." Leah Clearwater, Breaking Dawn

11) "Shut up, Jacob. Oops, I’m sorry – I mean, shut up, most high Alpha." - Leah Clearwater, Breaking Dawn

12) "They’re just cliff diving, Bella. Recreation. La Push doesn’t have a mall, you know." - Jacob Black, New Moon

13) "Go fetch a space heater. I’m not a St. Bernard." - Jacob Black, Eclipse

14) "I felt like – like I don’t know what. Like this wasn’t real. Like I was in some Goth version of a bad sitcom. Instead of being the A/V dweeb about to ask the head cheerleader to the prom, I was the finished-second-place werewolf about to ask the vampire’s wife to shack up and procreate. Nice." - Jacob Black, Breaking Dawn

15) "I decided as long as I was going to hell, I might as well do it thoroughly." - Edward Cullen, Twilight

16)"Are you so depressed by Forks that it’s made you suicidal?" - Edward Cullen, Twilight

I'm The Kind of Girl...

I'm the kind of girl who walks into a door and apoligizes.

I'm the kind of girl who would rather act stupid than smart.

I'm the kind of girl who would burst out laughing in a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday. (

I'm the kind of girl who would get fired at the M&M's company for throwing out the w's.

I'm the kind of girl who would rather love a guy from a book than in real life.

I'm the kind of girl who gets drunk off soda and loves every minute of it.

I've been diagnosed with OCD (Obbsessive Cullen Disorder), OED (Obsessive Edward Disorder), OVD (Obbsessive Vampire Disorder), and OMCD (Obsessive Mythical Creatures Disorder).

ids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

If you believe that over half of all you say/write/think doesn't come out right and is complete stupidity, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times where you annoy people just for the fun of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you think that the Twilight series will rule the universe, copy this into your profile.

If you think that Bella and Jasper were meant to be together, copy this into your profile!

If you belive your own Jasper Hale is out there somewhere, add this.

If you know you have an unhealthy obsession with any or all of the Cullens, but you don't really care because you don't want to heal quite frankly, post this. (Yes, I do, okay? Get over it! I don't care! ;) )

If whenever you see or hear the name 'Edward,Jasper or Jacob' you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much and then people stare at you and tell you to shut up and let it go, post this.

If you think Edward Cullen, Jasper Hale and Jacob Black is hot...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If the only thing you think about is the Twilight series copy and past this to your profile.

If you are in LOVE with Jasper Whitlock copy and paste this to your profile.

If your in love with a fictional character (like any of the Cullen brothers XD) copy and paste this to your profile

If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile.

I read Eclipse and I wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD(but i still like him idk why)

If you find people questioning your sanity, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing maniacally, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you and/or your best friend is insane, copy and paste this into your profile. For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what are you doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob fest, and start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say some completely random thing, like," Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumb-war with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings and tape them on your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you memorize the biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework instead of doing it. Crazy is when you giggle upon finding out that Edward has gone to the Volturi, because it was stupid for him to take second hand information. Crazy is when you wish your boyfriend's name was Jasper or Edward. Crazy is when you sit for hours on end talking about Edward with your friends. Crazy is when one of your friends come up to you and says "He is so completely georgous!" and you know exactly who their talking about because your brain is no longer set on English, but Twilight. Crazy is sitting in about every desk in your english class becasue you and your friends wont stop talking about Twilight and Edward so then your teacher tries to seperate you but it never works becasue the bond between Edward fans always bring you back together. Crazy is you and your friends shouting at the top of your lungs in public place that you are in love with the characters of twilight (several times a day).Crazy is when you try to hold your breath after learning that Edward and his family can. If you are crazy, copy this onto your profile.

you think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in ur profile!

If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy this to your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or the vise versa copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.

My best friend is insane, if you think your best friend is insane, put this in your profile.

Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and prode of it, put this in your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, put it in your profile..

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.

If whenever you see or hear the brand "volvo" you freak out and start giggling uncontrolably and then people stare at you funny copy and paste this onto your profile

If you pray that Jasper takes off his shirt in he fight scene in eclipse, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that Jasper absolutely ROCKS, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you like your men (or women for those male readers) cold, dead, and sparkling, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile. (Seriously wtf?)

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile

93 percent of teenagers would have an emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you are part of the 7 percent that would say "What was your first clue?” copy this onto your profile

If you have ever walked into a wall, copy this onto your profile

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile

If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen out of a chair backwards...copy/paste this into your profile

If you have ever fallen up the sairs copy this on your profile

If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are totally in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward Cullen, put this into your profile

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you're on the computer, paste this on your profile.

If you have ever pasted anything on your profile, paste this on your profile.

If you aren't me, paste this on your profile.

If you have a profile, paste this on your profile

If you don't use Myspace and are proud enough to make it public, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear baiting, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile!

If you KNOW the voice in your head is real, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you are insanely weird, copy this into your profile.

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.

If you just sung them both in your head and feel like an idiot, put this in your profile

If gum has ever fallen out of your mouth while you were talking, copy this into your profile

If gum has ever fallen out of your mouth when you weren't talking, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever put an ipod up to your ear to listen to the music, copy this into your profile. (don't ask)

7 Ways to Know You Are Addicted to Twilight (I Know I Am):

1. You can quote any passage from the series at the drop of a hat.

2. The first thing you do when you get on the computer is check Stephenie Meyer's website

3. No matter what song comes on the radio, you automatically find a way to relate it to Twilight

4. You find yourself daydreaming about Edward Cullen and wishing you were Bella.

5. No guy will ever live up to your expectations because Edward is too perfect.

6. You can talk about the book for an entire lunch period without running out of things to say.

7. You look through a vocabulary book or dictionary and can instantly pick out which words are found in the series

You Know your obsessed if...

1. You think your next door neighbor looks or is a vampire.

2. You try to control your thoughts because you think Edward can hear them.

3. You've read the series like 5 times each.

4. You check Stephenie Meyer's site or my site 10 times a day to see if there is any new Twilight News.

5. You think your best friend is crazy for not reading the Twilight series.

6. Twilight has ruined any future reading for you.

7. You use Twilight for every school project that comes around.

8. You watch the show Moonlight and picture Beth as Bella and Mick as Edward.

9. You get so excited when you see someone reading Twilight, and you have to talk to them even if you don't know them.

10. Every conversation you have with your friends somehow leads back to an Edward vs. Jacob debate.

11. Your friend finally decides to read it so she can keep up with your conversations.

12. Your guy friends hasn't read the books yet but hears you talk about Edward Cullen so much he despises him with a loathing passion that he brings up almost as much as you bring up the series.

13. You go to your relatives house for a holiday and refuse to socialize until you have finished reading the book in the series that you are on.

14. You get all freaked out every time you hear the name Edward or your subsitutes name is Mrs. Cullen.

15. You stop asking to go to the beach for vacation and ask if you can go to Forks, Washington and look for the Cullens.

16. You love Edward more than your boyfriend.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, IwuvMyKenshyPoo, Heidiplease, iNsOmNiAc BiLlIe JoE lOvEr, Black Panther Warrior, bright black stars, StormDragon666, Sasuke's 2 Child Sayuri Uchiha, silver cherryblossom, BrightRubyEyes, Crazii Kimmy Girl,Angelz on edge, boredom.and.school.sucks, RandomCullenFanGirl1901,jalicecullen, LucyLuva,iwantyourjeep234

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile

If you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your profile

AACIBD is Addicted to All Cullen’s Including Bella Disorder.

If when you have a child, you'd consider naming them Edward or Anthony, copy this into your profile

Even when you can’t see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile.

If you think that Emmett absolutely ROCKS, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever acted like a paranoid fool because you believe (or wish) that the Twilight characters exist, copy and paste this onto your profile.

You live off of sugar and caffeine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)

Edward Cullen made every girl want a bloodthirsty vampire instead of a knight in shining armor.

You're just jealous because we act retarded in public and people still love us!

I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

Jacob Black: I want to La Push him off a cliff.

Bella- It's a... cow.

Edward- No Bella, it's a dinosaur, of course it's a cow.

Bella- You want me to eat it?

Edward- No, I want you to throw a stick at it and see if it brings it back!

Bella- Feeling sarcastic today?

Edward- A little bit.

Edward: So the lion.

Jacob: Sure, sure.

Edward: (Grins evilly) Ate the dog... rawr.

Jacob: WTC?!

Screw being a princess, I wanna be a vampire!

Team Alice: because she's pretty,funny,quirky,hyper,sweet, and can see if ur about to get hit by a car.

I can be Mrs. Cullen, you can be Mrs. Black; you can die, I can live forever.

PLEASE COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE:

Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school
He told his friends that it was cool
And when he pulled the trigger back
It shot with a great crack
Mummy I was a good girl
I did what I was told
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold
But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye
I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry
When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another
And all because he got the gun from his older brother
Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much
And please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush
And tell my little sister that she is the only one now
And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best
Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest
Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class
And never to forget this and please don't let this pass
Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this
Mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss
And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try
I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry
Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest
But mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest
Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack
Mummy listen to me if you would
I wanted to go to college
I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with daddy
On that trip to the new zoo
I wanted to get married
I wanted to have a kid
I wanted to be an actress
Mummy I wanted to live
But mummy I must go now
The time is getting late
Mummy tell my Chris
I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date
I love you mummy I always have
I know you know it's true
Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you"
In memory of the Columbian students that were lost
Please if you would
Pass this around
I'd be happy if you could
Don't smash this on the ground
If you pass this on
Maybe people will cry
Just keep this in heart
For the people that didn't get to say "goodbye"

Full Blood Vampire

You were born a vampire meaning no bite marks for you. Some say you are the direct descendent of a demon from hell, while others say you are descended from Vlad Tempish, also known as Dracula. Your skills are more powerful than a regular vampire's, the difference being impossible for humans to comprehend. It is said you can even call shadows to help you. You also have age control, meaning you may be 10,000 years old but can look 10 or 100 depending on what you like.

see what you are at:

Mixed Drink

You're young, fun, good-looking, and tasty. You like to stir things up. You're a Mixed Drink! And with all those ingredients, and funky names, you're probably also on the high-maintenance side as well. But you deserve the attention.

You say Taylor...
I say Robert...
You say Jacob...
I say Edward...
You say Harry Potter
I say Cedric Diggory
You say Pg: 282 in Twilight...
I say Pg: 113-117 in Breaking Dawn...
You say you like hot guys...
I say I LOVE Cold Guys Edward
You say Human...
I say Vampires...
You say Real Vampire...
I say Vegetarian Vampire...
You say Team Jacob...
I say Fuck You :

██▓▒░ ░▒▓████▓▒░ ░▒▓█████▓▒
_ _EDWARD _ _CULLEN _
██▓▒░ ░▒▓████▓▒░ ░▒▓█████▓▒

... ... ... Edward Cullen ... ... ...
...

¸.•(¸.•´ •.¸)•.¸ «´¨•Breaking Dawn•´¨» ´•.¸(•.¸ ¸.•´)¸.•´

Bella: Do I Ever Cross Your Mind?
Edward: No
Bella: Do You Like Me?
Edward: Not Really.
Bella: Do You Want Me?
Edward: No.
Bella: Would You Cry If I Left?
Edward: No.
Bella: Would You Live For Me?
Edward: No.
Bella: Would You Do Anything For Me?
Edward: No.
Bella: What would u choose,me or your life?.
Edward: My Life.
Bella Runs Away In Shock And Pain And Edward Runs After Her And Says:
The Reason You Never Cross My Mind Is Because Your Always On My Mind
The Reason I Don't Like You Is Because I Love You
The Reason I Don't Want You Is Because I Need You
The Reason I Wouldn't Cry If You Left Is Because I Would Die If You Left
The Reason I Wouldn't Live For You Is Because I Would Die For You
The Reason I'm Not Willing To Do Anything For You Is Because I Would Do Everything For You
The Reason I Choose My Life Is Because You Are My Life!

Twilight
..I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
.I Twilight
..I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight
...I Twilight

╔══╦══╦══╗ you have been diagnosed
║╔╗║╔═╣╔╗║ with Obsessive Cullen
║╚╝║╚═╣╚╝║ Disorder put this on your
╚══╩══╩══╝ profile if you've caught it too!

Jacob Black glared at the children dressed as vampires, and he knew it wasn't right, but he lied and told them there was no candy left anyway.

Copy and paste this in your profile if you would gladly drive to Forks, kidnap Jacob Black, and slap him with a rubber chicken until he admitted that Bella and Edward belong together, and that you are the awesomest person ever.

there were 3girls

They were looking through peoples
MySpaces.

The girl slowly came upon this one
myspace.

It had creatures in the background and the man
looked like a psycho.

She started laughing with her friend commenting on how ugly he was.

Right then, an instant message came up.

It said:

SatanStalker: So how do u like my
MySpace??

XxLoVemExX: What??

XxLoVemExX: Who is this anyway??

SatanStalker: Well, you should know;
youre looking at my MySpace right now.

XxLoVemExX: How do you know that im looking at ur pro??

SatanStalker:I know when people look at my MySpace.

XxLoVemExX: What? That doesnt make
any sense, how?

SatanStalker: I just do.

Satanstalker: Especially to pretty girls like you.

Satanstalker: With very nice legs I might say.

At the time the girl was wearing high
shorts.

She started to pull them down a little bit to cover what
ever she could. Her and her friend started to get
worried now.

XxLoVemExX: Ok whatever man youre starting to scare the living sht out of me.

SatanStalker: You should be afraid.

SatanStalker: You wouldnt want an ugly guy like me touching your legs huh? I mean thats what you
just said about me with your friend like a
minute ago.

They were in shock.

Her friend: Holy crap man just block him
hes a fcking psycho!

The girl: Ok holy crap, you think hes
watching us?

SatanStalker: I am.

SatanStalker: Well it wouldnt really
matter if you blocked me anyway; it wouldnt stop me
from coming to your house.

XxLoVemExX: What? My house?

SatanStalker: Yeah, youre alone so its
not a problem.

XxLoVemExX: Ok I think Im going to leave now because youre freaking me out.

SatanStalker: Your screen name says
love me, trust me that wont be a problem.

SatanStalker has just signed off.

The girl and her friend were really
scared. Girls

friend: Whatever lets just go upstairs trust me I doubt hes really coming. Its just a joke from someone.

They went upstairs and were having a pillow fight.

All of a sudden the girls friend said she had to go to the bathroom. The girl said ok.

Ten minutes later the girl noticed that her friend was
still in the bathroom and was wondering what was up.

She goes and knocks but no one said
anything

she opens it and finds her friend there on
the ground dead. She started to scream but when she
turned around he was there. News the next morning said that there was one girl dead in the bathroom;

her neck sliced with blood all over the ground. with her head nailed to the wall. Just her head.

If you do not repost this in the next two
minutes here will be three men, one in your
bathroom,

one in your room, and one killing your parents at that
very moment.

Tonight at 1:30am. Well what are you waiting for?

Repost or you are going to die


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Baby Eddie and Baby Bella story by emily007 reviews
Discover what life is like for baby Edward, Bella, Jacob and their friends.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 15,411 - Reviews: 292 - Favs: 224 - Follows: 157 - Updated: 3/31/2013 - Published: 7/29/2009 - Bella, Edward
The Cullen LoveChild by EdwardCullen0x reviews
Bella Swan fled from millionare Edward Cullen when she learnt of her preganancy and now five years later he is back. Bella will be the Cullen bride willingly or not...
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 20,044 - Reviews: 359 - Favs: 326 - Follows: 403 - Updated: 1/24/2013 - Published: 8/1/2009 - Bella, Edward
Classic Cullen Moments by Sarahgotbored reviews
(Discontinued. Only reason this hasn't been deleted is because I'm a sentimental freak and like to look back on things I wrote when I was 13. Quite frankly it's awful, Stay away!)
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 58 - Words: 52,818 - Reviews: 1316 - Favs: 381 - Follows: 206 - Updated: 12/28/2011 - Published: 12/9/2008 - Complete
Knock You down by Eclipse Babe reviews
I love that smile, I think I love him. Is that possible? Does he love me back? We really are perfect together. Wait why am I thinking about Jake like this. Something really strange is going on. Did I imprint? Is that possible?" Jake/Leah Song fic.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 29 - Words: 53,956 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 76 - Follows: 77 - Updated: 3/31/2011 - Published: 7/20/2009 - Jacob, Leah
Growing Up a Cullen by h2ocatluvr33 reviews
3 year old Bella Swan has lost her parents in a vampire attack. The Cullen's have taken her in where she will live with them. Little do they know her parents killer is close by, watching little Bella's steps. Please review! This is my first fanfic
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 28 - Words: 36,269 - Reviews: 424 - Favs: 313 - Follows: 217 - Updated: 12/15/2010 - Published: 5/2/2009 - Bella, Edward
Wife Swap: Cullen vs Clyne by xocullen4everxo reviews
Emmett decides to sign up Esme for Wife Swap. What will happen when she switches places with a woman from Oregon? Will the Cullens like their new mommy?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 31,836 - Reviews: 842 - Favs: 514 - Follows: 435 - Updated: 12/4/2010 - Published: 6/20/2009
Raising our babies by SparklyVampireLover reviews
When Edward left, Bella was pregnant.Charlie kicks her out, and Renee disowns her. She is truely alone, accept from some friendly werewolfs. Theres an accident with Charlie, and Bella is changing in many ways. What will she do when the Cullens come back?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 18 - Words: 18,595 - Reviews: 230 - Favs: 198 - Follows: 169 - Updated: 7/2/2010 - Published: 7/25/2009 - Bella, Edward
Cullens Adopt a Kid by WhyFightAnEclipseWhenTheresJaz reviews
Its pretty much what the title says. Then Cullens adopt an human kid. What will happened? First fan fic so please give it a try.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 52 - Words: 65,770 - Reviews: 440 - Favs: 170 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 6/7/2010 - Published: 5/14/2009 - Complete
Wife Swap: Cullen Vs Newton by hotflower06 reviews
5 years after Breaking Dawn, both Edward and Bella and the recent married Jessica and Mike end up on Wife Swap. What will happen? Does Mike still love Bella? how can the Cullens possibly hide they're secret with Jessica around? And who's James?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 34,469 - Reviews: 518 - Favs: 249 - Follows: 209 - Updated: 3/13/2010 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Bella, Jessica
Twins by JK614 reviews
Bella has twins! Renesmee and EJ, Edward Junior. EJ meets Ella at the mall and they become quick friends. What happens when Leah gets thrown into the mix? -Dun, dun, duuun- Takes place around 10 years after BD.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 9 - Words: 14,580 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 2/12/2010 - Published: 7/23/2009
25 Ways to Annoy Vampires by 2XdemonsXandXaXprincess reviews
We've come up with 25 ways to annoy the Cullens. Anti-Twilight fic! *prepares to be shot* R&R, please!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 287 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/31/2010 - Published: 7/29/2009
Fuchsia Sunset by Dark'Skinned'Angel reviews
A 17 year old girl finds something different. Something that will turn all heads. Hopefully, it wont turn the head of her father and the rest of her tribe.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 12,785 - Reviews: 92 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 11/27/2009 - Published: 9/7/2009 - Jasper - Complete
Crazy AIM by XshoppingshortieX reviews
What will happen when the Cullen's get AIM? Bella is in love with fruit loops, Emmett is going to cry? And Jasper is perky? Read to find out more! Bella is still human!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 3,579 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 11/14/2009 - Published: 7/4/2009 - Complete
Plans by Uxiegirl reviews
Alice is pregnant, and she doesn't know if she can make it. Maria's dangerous, but still out there. Hidden feelings come to surface. Can Alice and Jasper get through it, or will everything crash and burn into pieces? Sequel to What I've Done.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 34,206 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 11/11/2009 - Published: 7/26/2009 - Alice, Jasper
Keeping Afloat A JasperBella Fic by Jasper-Alice.FAN reviews
Alice has left him. Edward has died. Leaving behind 2 broken souls, but how will Jasper and Bella cope? Not very well. Some Lemons - ALMOST finished - NO TIMEEEE! Fml.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 22 - Words: 21,039 - Reviews: 427 - Favs: 139 - Follows: 191 - Updated: 10/19/2009 - Published: 6/20/2009 - Jasper, Bella
what really happened in the movie twilight by It's a Wolf Thinga reviews
the title tells it all
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 774 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 10/17/2009 - Published: 7/31/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Sk8er Boy by edwardcullenlover1 reviews
Edward is a skater who has an anoying jock of a brother. He never liked anyone before. That was until his friend's cousin comes. Her name is Bella. And she loves to skateboard too. Will they find love? Will Emmett stop stealing Edward's stuff?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,010 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 9/30/2009 - Published: 7/13/2009 - Edward, Bella
Taken by CMCastle reviews
SEQUEL TO ALONE! Edward and Bella's children were kidnapped after the wedding. Its been 3 years now and they still haven't found Them. When they try to escape, Ellie gets caught. Will Tony be able to find the Cullen's quick enough before Ellie gets hurt?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,851 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 9/19/2009 - Published: 8/10/2009
The New Pet 2: Heart of the Lion by Blueroan reviews
The continuing adventure of Sarah, the newest member of the Cullen family. Still 'blind' but now a vampire with awsome gifts, she faces new challanges and new danger.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 42 - Words: 125,687 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 9/9/2009 - Published: 1/14/2009 - Carlisle, Esme - Complete
Twilight: The Rewrite by SmileysRoxSox reviews
Twilight in a movie script form, rewritten by yours truly. Features Edward with anger problems and a 'scary human'.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,193 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 8/28/2009 - Published: 8/1/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Truth They Kept Hidden by rosebook reviews
They hid her from her past. Now Nessie finds the Twilight Books with the help of her friend, Clare. Short summmery but I hope it's a good story. PS I used a bit of an authors license. Should I continue?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 9,119 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 8/7/2009 - Published: 7/28/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Bella
Alone by CMCastle reviews
When Edward left Bella, Time stood still. Bella was devastated, how could she live without Edward? But when Edward left, he didn't only leave Bella… he left the child that was growing inside of her. What will Happen when the Cullen's Appear once again?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 17,670 - Reviews: 159 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 7/29/2009 - Published: 5/22/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Sunlight: Renesmee's Story Second Part by Lettheblacknessrollon reviews
Sequel to part one; Renesmee is fully grown, pregnant and engaged to Jacob. Have to read part one to understand! Still rated M for a reason! In other words, plenty of lemonade
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 37 - Words: 127,861 - Reviews: 504 - Favs: 330 - Follows: 120 - Updated: 5/24/2009 - Published: 3/6/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob - Complete
Welcome to Walmart by 1 Twilighter reviews
Okay so this is one of those whole '15 things to do at Walmart' things. the Cullens go to complete the list. WARNING WILL CAUSE LAUGHING. Rated M for future subjects. Cannon Couples.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 941 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 13 - Published: 4/15/2009
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

LA with the cullen reviews
alice signed up fro a secert getaway but carlise and esme and lets not forget edward dont aprove will they stay or go to calli
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 711 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/12/2009 - Edward, Alice
10 ways to piss of edward cullen reviews
it all in the title rated t just to be safe
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 900 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 7/30/2009 - Edward
aim with the cullens reviews
i really suck at sum but here it goes,alice shopin nessie and jake are in love and uncle em is try to kill jake again what else could go wrong post bd
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 834 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 7/15/2009