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Poll: I'm having trouble deciding what story to update first or to just start a start a new one. If you want a new story, PM me what you what 'criminal minds, rookie blue, chicago code,etc' dont have an account? Tell me in a review to one of my stories. Vote Now!
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Joined 07-23-09, id: 2019724, Profile Updated: 02-26-11
Author has written 4 stories for Twilight, X-overs, Race to Witch Mountain, and Misc. Tv Shows.

Simple as this:

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If you want updates, then REVIEW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

please once again, review and vote in my poll!! i love all the feed back and 2 seconds to review really!! please just do it!! thanks bye!!

REVIEW!! it ISNT very inspiring to update if there are hits but no reviews! ANY of my stories! i want to know what you think and what you'd like to happen in the stories so if i get writers block or if your idea is a great one, i might use it (giving you complete credit of course and your permission to use it in one of my stories). I dont really care what you write in the review, even flames, i just want reviews so i dont lose complete interest in writing.

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn't care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves Twilight and Gone With The Wind, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, guitarhorselover, teamjacob247, ThatStupidLamb95, Fanglvr13, Jacob Black. . .Ooft Phitt, LE Trex, ATLjunkie

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver

Why are you here and what can i do to change that!

Do me a magic trick and Disapear!

I see your playing stupid again...Looks like your winning again too...

Im only mean to ppl who tell me to be nice

I had a dream last night and in it something ate you

Kids are the future. Frightened?

Lets be friends. I'd like a dumb friend

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we fucked up!

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your shit and tells you, "My's a tissue." lol sounds familiar

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through highschool/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Bitch drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

A friend helps you when you fall;

a best friend says "Walk much, dumbass?"

A friend gives you their umbrella when it rains;

a best friend takes your's and says "RUN, BEEP, RUN!"

A friend wipes your tears when you're rejected;

a best friend walks up (me: in public) to him and says "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A friend will bail you out of jail;

a best friend will be in the room next to you saying "THAT WAS AWESOME, LETS DO IT AGAIN!!

A good friend helps you when you fall.

A best friend laughs and trips you again.

FRIENDS: Meet your boy/girl friend and say nice to meet you

BESTFRIENDS: Meet your boy/girl friend and scare the BLEEP out of him/her by threatening to break every bone in him/her's body if he/she hurts your bestfriend

FRIENDS: Will say you can do better

BESTFRIENDS: Will call him and say"you have seven days to live"

FRIENDS: Ask why you're crying

BESTFRIENDS:Already have a shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry

FRIENDS: Will help you move

BESTFRIENDS: Will help you move a dead body

FRIENDS: Will pick out a cute chick-flick to watch with you on movie night

BESTFRIENDS: Will pick out "The Ring" for movie night then scare you and himself/herself in the process

FRIENDS: comfort you when you fight with your boyfriend

BEST FRIENDS: go over to his house and kick his ass

FRIENDS: tell you to forget it when you say you want to vandalize a guy's house

BEST FRIENDS: best friends are the ones getting fined by the police with you

FRIENDS: Think your insane for jumping off a roof onto a trampoline

BEST FRIENDS: Are jumping right after you

FRIENDS: come over every couple of months for a sleepover

BEST FRIENDS: are your weekend boarders

FRIENDS: are offended when you make fun of them

BEST FRIENDS: kick your ass and all's forgiven

FRIENDS: are shy around your boyfriend

BEST FRIENDS: will tease him till he blushes redder than a fire engine

FRIENDS: don't see you if you're sick

BEST FRIENDS: are why you're sitting in bed under a blanket with a thermometer, book, and your phone

FRIENDS: call you retarded for running threw bleachers yelling "IT'S PICKLE TIME!"

BEST FRIENDS: are screaming and running with you

are like apples
on trees. The best ones
are at the top of the tree.
The boysdont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
to the top
of the tree.


1. They will always smell good even if it's just shampoo.

2. The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder.

3. How cute they look when they sleep.

4. The ease in which they fit into our arms .

5. The way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in the world.

6. How cute they are when they eat.

7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it all worth while.

8. Because they are always warm even when its minus 30 outside.

9. The way they look good no matter what they wear.

10. The way they fish for compliments even though you both know that you think she's the most beautiful girl on this earth.

11. How cute they are when they argue.

12. The way her hand always finds yours.

13. The way they smile.

14. The way you feel when you see their name on the call ID after you just had a big fight.

15. The way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know that an hour later...

16. The way that they kiss after you have had a fight.

17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you".

18. Actually...Just the way they kiss you...

19. The way they fall into your arms when they cry.

20. Then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly.

21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt.

22. Then the way they apologize when it does hurt (even though we don't admit it).

23. The way they say "I miss you".

24. The way you miss them.

25. The way their tears make you want to change the world so that it doesn't hurt her anymore...

Yet regardless if you love them, hate them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes, traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them for a million reasons, no paper would do it justice. It is a thing not of the mind but of the heart.


1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck k!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Reasons why girls are the best

1.We got off the Titanic first

2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.

7. Taxis stop for us.

8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).

11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.

13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.

14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.

15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.

18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.

19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.

21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.

22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.

23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.

25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.

26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.

28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.


I'm a girl so I'm probably cruel

I'm a lady so I'm probably irrational

I'm a women so I'm probably crazy

I'm a female so I'm probably sexy

Miss or Ms. "Whatever".Girls rule,Boys drool.

All of the above put this in your pro.

Girls Don't realize these things;

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses
to tell you that I like you

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect
not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough
to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry
that I open your car door,
and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough
to be "your guy"

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice;
not a jerk

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account
to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home
cuddling with you, instead of at a club

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you
like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to,
but never good enough to date

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you20threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car,
but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere,
but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this
but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good
enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm Sorry
That I cared

I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things' I really wish that more guys were like this, and I bet alot of girls do too.

List twelve of your favorite characters from books, in no particular order. (im gonna use charaters from my stories instead) most are in books anyway

1. Seth -RTWM-

2. Caroline Ryan

3. Henry burk -RTWM-

4. Edward Cullen

5. Sara -RTWM-

6. Jasper Hale

7. Carlisle Cullen

8. Esme Cullen

9. Jacob Black

10. Seth Clearwater

11. Alice Cullen

12. Romeo

1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?

Jasper / Alice ..Yes

2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

Edward...yes. hot enough not to tell Bella

3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?

romeo/esme...not possible emse's a vamp

4. Can you recall any fics about Nine?


5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?

Caroline/jasper...if alice was with some one else and jasper doesnt kill caroline because of his thirst then yes they could

6. Five/Nine or Nine/Ten? Why?

Sara/jacob...jacob/seth...sara=jacob...because from what i know neither seth or jacob are gay

7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve making out?

carlisle/caroline/romeo...he'd be like WAT tHE FUCK

8. Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.

henry/seth clearwater...what happens when the undercover agent and the werewolf meet in the dense green forest? Henry looking for Seth's pack because he thinks they're aliens? Will he listen to Seth when he tries to explain that they're not E.B.Es they're werewolves. Will Henry listen? Will seth and the pack come out the lab of Witch mountain alive?

9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?

(RTWM) Seth/esme...I dont hope not...?

10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.

carlisle/romeo...old friends new frienemies?

11. Does anyone on your friends list read Three fics?

henry ? i dont think there is any...?

12. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?

alice...yes i think so

13. Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?

caroline/edward/sara...doubt it, but maybe...?

14. If you wrote a Song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?

esme...home sweet home

15. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?

Seth/jasper/ content, think before you click this

16. When was the last time you read a fic about Five?


17. "(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (9) runs off with (4). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (2).

(RTWM) Seth and Carlisle are in a happy relationship until jacob runs off with edward (i dont think that would happen unless they're extremely drunk or high...?). Seth, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Alice and a brief unhappy affair with romeo (uhhh...?), then follows the wise advice of Sara (his sister) and finds true love with Caroline.

What title would you give this fic?

Who are you truely meant to be with?

18. How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?

Carlisle/ is...

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 81, and find line 4.

Tom was pointing directly at him (The chronicles of Vlladimir Tod- Eighth Grade Bites)

The Twilight Oath

I promise to remember Bella
Each time I carelessly fall down
And I promise to remember Edward
Whenever I'm out of town
I promise to obey traffic laws
For Charlie’s sake of course
And I promise to remember Jacob
When my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Carlisle
When ever I am in the emergency room
And I promise to remember Emmett
Every time there's a huge boom
I promise to to remember Rose
Whenever I see something that holds pure beauty
And I promise to remember Alice
When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me
I promise to remember Nessie
When I see that beautiful bronze hair
And I promise to remember Esme
When someone tells me they care
I promise to remember Jasper
Whenever my stomach isn't curled
And I promise to remember the Volturi
When someone speaks of dominating the world
Yes I promise to love Twilight
Wherever I may go
So that all may see my obsession
Because I know what the Twilighters know

You Know You're Obsessed With Twilight When...

1) You have read Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse and Breaking Dawn at least 4 times.

2) You own all above mentioned books.

3) You know that they're totally going to screw up Twilight the Movie, and you want to see it anyway.

4) You have read everything on every page of Stephanie Meyer’s web site.

5) You have reread a lot of these pages.

6) You read fan fiction about Twilight.

7) You write fan fiction about Twilight.

8) At one point or another, you have had a screen name/username that says something about Twilight or its characters.

9) You constantly counted the days until Breaking Dawn came out.

10) If said people have not read Twilight, you insist that they read it, because it is, and I quote, "the best book ever".

11) You know that you are not crazy for being obsessed with Twilight; people who don't understand it just haven't read the book.

12) If anyone says something that goes against the statement that Twilight is the best book on the planet, you immediately start to argue with them.

13) You stand firm by your belief that anyone who says that Twilight is just a crappy, unrealistic love story (and yes, believe it or not, I do know someone who has said this!) should be taken to the edge of a cliff and pushed off.

14) For months after you read it, Twilight was your favorite subject to talk about.

15) When you found out you would have to wait until August of 2008 for Breaking Dawn to come out, you almost cried.

16) You argue with your friends over which member of the Cullen family you like best.

17) You began reading fan fiction as a desperate attempt to read something about Twilight, when you had already finished the books.

18) No matter how many times you read Twilight or Twilight-related stories, you never get tired of it.

19) As you read this list, you are smiling and nodding at almost every thing you read.

20) Even though you know it's impossible, you often wish that you were a vampire.

21) Vampires are officially your favorite mythical creature ever.

22) Your personal motto is: vampires are cool, not scary.

23) When you hear that someone read Twilight and didn't like it or thought it was stupid, you just shake your head and sigh.

24) You literally haunt Stephenie Meyer's website waiting for new information.

25) You're driving your parents mad with your crazy countdowns.

26) You're keeping track of all the "Eclipse/Breaking Dawn Quotes of the Day" and trying to figure out what they all mean

27) You can't believe that most people haven't read the books.

28) You know all the characters so well that you feel as if you could write your own stories about them.

29) You spend most of your day making up "What if...?" questions about all the different plot lines.

30) You've actually read the play "Romeo & Juliet" just so you could find out how Jacob would die.

31) You know you're addicted, but you don't care.

32) When you found out that Breaking Dawn wasn't coming out until 2008, you had a mental breakdown.

33) When you found out about Midnight Sun you had yet another mental breakdown.

34) Your mom refuses to buy you anything else Twilight related because she doesn't want to fuel your obsession.

35) You have read Wuthering Heights only because its Bella's favorite book.

36) You have read Jane Austen or Shakespeare books/plays just because they are mentioned in Twilight.

37) You use "OME" (or a letter of one of the Cullen's first name) instead of OMG.

38) You were so excited when the Twilight/New Moon clips aired on the MTV Movie Awards; you cried tears of joy for almost 30 minutes before it was shown.

39) You have pictures of Edward by your bed so he can watch you sleep, just like he watches Bella sleep.

40) You have read your Twilight books so much that they are falling apart.

I am Team Switzerland- just like Bella. I love them both for different reasons. I hate them both for different reasons. Remember... they both have their flaws.

ThInGs To PoNdEr:

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, is that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why do so many old people eat at cafeterias?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?
Why does the word "Filipino" start with the letter F?
Why are the copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numbers?

Spread the Stupidity!!

Stupid Product Labels

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions:
"Put on fork and eat."
(No! Really? We're supposed to eat food?!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(And that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's just a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds with colds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On artificial bacon:
"Real artificial bacon bits".
(So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon.)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(Hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(But no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(Somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

Only in America...

1. Only in America... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America... do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America... do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America... do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America... do they have drive up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Ever wonder...

Why the sun lightens out hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline: Psychic Wins Lottery?

Why is abbreviated such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do practice?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic call rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Show Me Your Teeth by Wolf Caper reviews
Fun with the pack. Season Two AU. Lots of changes between the friends. Everyone is a werewolf now, with a good explanation - m/m, m/f, f/f - EXPLICIT CONTENT - MA
Teen Wolf - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 24 - Words: 75,684 - Reviews: 263 - Favs: 196 - Follows: 229 - Updated: 10/15/2012 - Published: 11/11/2011 - Stiles, Derek H.
Let's Start A War, A Nuclear War by Saucery reviews
The obligatory gay bar story. Stiles gets hit on and Derek goes berserk. Meanwhile, Scott is all-knowing and Danny is awesome.
Teen Wolf - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,916 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 236 - Follows: 45 - Published: 7/5/2012 - Stiles, Derek H. - Complete
James Bond doesn't have anything on Derek Hale by Storylover158 reviews
Stiles needs to be rescued in a bar and in comes Derek. Short One-shot
Teen Wolf - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 674 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 21 - Published: 6/29/2012 - Derek H., Stiles - Complete
I've Got A Whole Bunch of Ways by QuirkyChick reviews
Derek reads a lot and it's hot. Stiles has mad baking skills and it's hot. Or, the one in which Derek and Stiles can be amazingly hot together. Derek/Stiles. Oneshot.
Teen Wolf - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,982 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 129 - Follows: 22 - Published: 5/17/2012 - Stiles, Derek H. - Complete
Call Me Maybe by QuirkyChick reviews
Stiles gets drunk at a party. Derek comes to pick him up. Things happen. Derek/Stiles. Oneshot.
Teen Wolf - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,808 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 23 - Published: 5/6/2012 - Stiles, Derek H. - Complete
Dark Side of the Moon by realtalkproject reviews
"Scott – Please…. " I cried. His yellow eyes gleamed with hunger, the thirst to kill. A deep growl released from his throat. I cried out in furious desperation. The wolf was glaring down above me. I felt the pain and then blackness surrounded me. SEQUEL UP
Teen Wolf - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 23 - Words: 52,311 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 3/18/2012 - Published: 2/11/2012 - Stiles - Complete
Undercover Lovers by astronomygirl85 reviews
Two agents go undercover as a couple in the Heart of Dixie to catch an UNSUB. The rest of the team thinks it's a perfect opportunity to set the two up for romance. Unbeknownst to them, the romance is already in motion.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 26,378 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 97 - Updated: 11/1/2011 - Published: 3/1/2011 - E. Prentiss, A. Hotchner/Hotch - Complete
Let the Games Begin by Gemini96 reviews
Andy is tired of having to ride shotgun everyday, so she comes up with ways to make Sam let her drive. Will it work?
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 6,336 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 9/17/2011 - Published: 4/22/2011 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Secrets and Jealousy by TwilightAngelForLyf reviews
Sam/Andy-Based after season 1 finale-Andy and Luke finally break up but secrets soon come out about said couple and a new transfer into 15 division causes jealousy by Sam as the transfer becomes close to Andy, but how will things turn out? *First fic : *
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,810 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 8/5/2011 - Published: 6/20/2011 - A. McNally, S. Swarek
A different way to meet by caseylt reviews
Andy and Sam meet outside of the force after Sam finishes his undercover work on Anton Hill. They don't know they are both cops. Set around signals crossed episode.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 10,050 - Reviews: 177 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 133 - Updated: 7/30/2011 - Published: 6/27/2011 - A. McNally, S. Swarek
When You Are Alone in the Locker Room by xxliveforever17xx reviews
Sam's happy facade over the engagement of McNally and Callaghan immediately crumbles when he finds himself alone in the locker room. Rated M for frequent strong swearing.
Rookie Blue - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 781 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/8/2011 - S. Swarek - Complete
No Other Options by xxliveforever17xx reviews
When Andy is left with nowhere to go after breaking it off with Luke, she has to accept the fact that the only person she has left to go to is the one person who's been there all along.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,854 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 7/7/2011 - Published: 7/1/2011 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Car Insurance Battle by WhatTheCensoredXD reviews
Derek finds his car damaged and two car insurance companies come and argue on which company is better: GEICO or State Farm? You choose!
Teen Wolf - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,108 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/6/2011 - Derek H. - Complete
Do You Find Me Attractive? by Caseyrocksmore reviews
Prompt fill: "I don't need to flirt, I will seduce you with my awkwardness." Derek/Stiles
Teen Wolf - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 503 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 379 - Follows: 53 - Published: 7/6/2011 - Stiles, Derek H. - Complete
Let's Do It Again by xxliveforever17xx reviews
With eight months of being a full-fledged cop under her belt and a new partner, Andy feels she can handle anything. But when fate intervenes, she's thrown together with the last person she thought she would ever see again. Sam/Andy, post-finale.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 20,488 - Reviews: 220 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 203 - Updated: 6/26/2011 - Published: 9/23/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek
Methinks Thou Doth Protest too Much by xxliveforever17xx reviews
Sam and Oliver have a short conversation about Sam's seemingly flippant remarks to Andy about his reluctance to go back to Guns and Gangs.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 602 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 5 - Published: 6/25/2011 - S. Swarek, O. Shaw - Complete
Elysium by tfm reviews
They thought that it was only going to be one night. They were wrong. An unexpected pregnancy leads Emily and Derek to reevaluate their lives.
Criminal Minds - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 21 - Words: 78,435 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 169 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 6/24/2011 - Published: 11/24/2010 - E. Prentiss, D. Morgan - Complete
The Auction by ClassicBeauty23 reviews
"Well, I already spent two thousand dollars on you, so we'll be staying in tonight." Couple: Sam Swarek and Andy McNally.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,138 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 12 - Published: 6/19/2011 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Don't You Wanna Stay? by xxliveforever17xx reviews
A night of drinking at Sam's house have left both him and Andy in an altogether not unpleasant compromising situation. Based on Jason Aldean's "Don't You Wanna Stay" and a little tidbit of the promo for Season 2.
Rookie Blue - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,341 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 10 - Published: 6/8/2011 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
I won't let go by ILUVGREYS-101 reviews
Sam and Andy. Post Season 1 Finale
Rookie Blue - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 757 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 8 - Published: 6/3/2011 - A. McNally, S. Swarek
Hockey Game Conversations by xxliveforever17xx reviews
Our favorite Canadian police officers Sam Braddock and Sam Swarek have a conversation during their regular hockey-game-and-beer tradition that surprisingly turns into a heart-to-heart about women. Rated T for a few swear words.
Crossover - Flashpoint & Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,041 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 8 - Published: 5/22/2011 - Sam B., S. Swarek - Complete
The Gang on Facebook? by Miko-Mo reviews
H/P going down on Facebook.
Criminal Minds - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 8,580 - Reviews: 139 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 4/29/2011 - Published: 2/13/2011 - E. Prentiss, A. Hotchner/Hotch - Complete
Blackout Mistake by Tanyaleefr reviews
or "What happened last night?" Girls night takes a wrong turn when Sam is asked to take Andy home.
Rookie Blue - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 16,526 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 4/28/2011 - Published: 3/19/2011 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Twitter War by SMchick reviews
Started as a one-shot with Sam & Andy bickering over tech & food choices on patrol. Morphed into a love story & an AU scenario where Sam was doing more than pining for Andy after his return to uniform. Good Dov & Traci stuff too. M for sexual slang & some swearing in late Chs. The sex isn't too explicit
Rookie Blue - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 34,858 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 4/8/2011 - Published: 2/24/2011 - [A. McNally, S. Swarek] OC - Complete
Home Field Advantage by dcj reviews
There's nothing like a little healthy competition.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 28,651 - Reviews: 102 - Favs: 127 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 3/19/2011 - Published: 2/26/2011 - S. Swarek, A. McNally - Complete
Old Friend, New Enemy by CygnusOlor reviews
Playing games isn't just for kids. Emily/JJ short fic Femslash . This is like my CM's debut, so hopefully i'll do it justice. Disclaimer: I own nothing, all rights go to their respective owners. Love it or Hate it.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 16,475 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 3/6/2011 - Published: 2/9/2011 - E. Prentiss, Jennifer J./JJ
How To Date a Genius by LoveforPenandDerek reviews
Emily is dating Spencer. The only problem is he doesn't know it.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,358 - Reviews: 113 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 3/4/2011 - Published: 2/19/2011 - S. Reid, E. Prentiss - Complete
Overheard by LoveforPenandDerek reviews
When Reid overhears Emily talking about him he starts to have fantasies about her.
Criminal Minds - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 13 - Words: 19,158 - Reviews: 179 - Favs: 109 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 2/27/2011 - Published: 2/9/2011 - E. Prentiss, S. Reid - Complete
Tickled Pink by SMchick reviews
Andy's "man problems" only get worse after moving in with Luke. Who knew a feather duster could end up creating all sorts of problems when she turns to Sam for help with car troubles?
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 14,177 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 2/22/2011 - Published: 2/15/2011 - [A. McNally, S. Swarek] L. Callaghan, O. Shaw - Complete
The Masks we Wear by Tanyaleefr reviews
Andy likes Sam. Sam likes Andy. Should be simple, right? Nothing's ever that simple with love.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 9 - Words: 17,204 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 2/21/2011 - Published: 1/18/2011 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Blind Date by phoebe9509 reviews
Just a short story that popped up into my mind. Read and review if you like.
Criminal Minds - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,135 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 17 - Published: 1/27/2011 - A. Hotchner/Hotch, E. Prentiss - Complete
Z Secret Santa ONESHOT by Fanatical Writer reviews
Emily runs into Reid on Christmas Eve under interesting circumstances, and Reid is determined to bring their friendship to the next level.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,232 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 6 - Published: 12/25/2010 - S. Reid, E. Prentiss - Complete
This Passion's Controversy by Funkymonkey713 reviews
During a special case, two detectives from Hawaii to help out. When one of them starts to take a liking to Andy, Sam gets jealous and the competition for Andy ensues. McSwarek love triangle story.
Crossover - Rookie Blue & Hawaii Five-0 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,417 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 12/24/2010 - Published: 10/23/2010 - A. McNally, Steve M. - Complete
Sundown by Tinat68 reviews
Sam is working a case and needs someone to step in for a few days. New story, not a continuation of 'Sometime after the Mermaid Lounge'.
Rookie Blue - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 30,979 - Reviews: 121 - Favs: 116 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 12/17/2010 - Published: 11/27/2010 - S. Swarek, A. McNally - Complete
The Christmas Tree Dress by JhsGptMS reviews
Dov hears one side of a phone conversation and draws the wrong conclusion. The phone call is just one part of Andy's plan to get Sam to finally step up. Humor laced tale of attempted seduction.
Rookie Blue - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,966 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 12/12/2010 - Published: 12/7/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Sometime after the Mermaid Lounge by Tinat68 reviews
Sam and Andy how long can they stay just friends?
Rookie Blue - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 21,697 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 11/24/2010 - Published: 11/13/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek
In His Arms by xxliveforever17xx reviews
"Andy McNally would never tell anyone, but she had contemplated suicide before." A look into Andy's psyche, the circumstances that shaped her, and the one person who saved her from herself. Slight Andy/Sam. Rated M for references to suicide and cutting.
Rookie Blue - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,108 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/15/2010 - A. McNally - Complete
Z All Hallow's Eavesdropping ONESHOT by Fanatical Writer reviews
When Reid wants to find out what the women are talking about, he stoops to spying. This story is written in response to the Candy Land Challenge on CCOAC. Just for fun!
Criminal Minds - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,302 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/15/2010 - E. Prentiss, S. Reid - Complete
Falling Slowly by tikvarn reviews
Life moves forward after the season finale. Post 1.13 Takedown.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,880 - Reviews: 168 - Favs: 109 - Follows: 117 - Updated: 11/10/2010 - Published: 10/20/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek
Why Affairs Are Bad by xxliveforever17xx reviews
It had taken him five months to realize it and one month to overcome his denial. Seeley Booth was having an affair. Booth/Bones, please review!
Bones - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 576 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/6/2010 - S. Booth, T. Brennan - Complete
Z Thank You ONESHOT by Fanatical Writer reviews
Prentiss gets a surprise from Reid when she gives him a lesson in kissing...this is in response to the Friday Fortune Cookie Challenge. ONESHOT
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,664 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/22/2010 - E. Prentiss, S. Reid - Complete
Out of Bounds by SMchick reviews
Sam and Andy's second undercover assignment spins wildly out of control. Take the M rating seriously! Other than Noelle getting a leadership role and Dov being Dov, this fic is all about finally getting hot, steamy McSwarek a highly inappropriate setting too. ;)
Rookie Blue - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,101 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 10/18/2010 - Published: 10/13/2010 - [S. Swarek, A. McNally] N. Williams, D. Epstein - Complete
Conversations in the Car by tikvarn reviews
Sam and Andy spend a lot of time in their squad car. Post "To Serve or Protect".
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 42,547 - Reviews: 546 - Favs: 330 - Follows: 95 - Updated: 10/17/2010 - Published: 9/4/2010 - S. Swarek, A. McNally - Complete
What He Wanted by xxliveforever17xx reviews
"Sam Swarek did not love his wife...she was not what he wanted, she was not what he loved." Sam regrets the choices he has made. It IS Andy/Sam, despite the summary, I swear!
Rookie Blue - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 761 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 6 - Published: 10/13/2010 - S. Swarek, A. McNally - Complete
The 19th Hole by KatRose reviews
Post-ep fic for the Season 1 finale: what happens after the phone rang
Glades - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 15,007 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 21 - Published: 10/10/2010 - Jim L., Callie C. - Complete
What We Give Up by Lileigh reviews
Would Andy really give up her apartment?
Rookie Blue - Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,093 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/8/2010 - A. McNally, T. Nash - Complete
Misgivings and Misreadings by xxliveforever17xx reviews
A serious misinterpreting of a relationship might cause a permanent riff between Sam and Andy.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,795 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 10/2/2010 - Published: 9/17/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Need a Reminder: Purity by tikvarn reviews
"As dark and evil as the world they worked in may seem, there were still some things that were good, some things that were innocent, some things that were pure." Told from Oliver's POV. Slight Oliver/Zoe, Sam/Andy, Gail/Chris, Jerry/Traci. FicTacToe!
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,224 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/25/2010 - O. Shaw - Complete
New Beginnings by Lileigh reviews
Just a short Sam/Andy moment in time. Set after she passes her evaluation. Obviously, I have no claim to the series and I don't know what is in the writer's minds, but here is a thought that crossed mine. Reviews are very appreciated.
Rookie Blue - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,218 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 9/24/2010 - Published: 9/5/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Just for Tonight by tikvarn reviews
"Just for tonight, Sam," she whispered, "Just forget that you hate me. Tomorrow we can go back to being whatever we were… are." Andy/Sam post 1.13
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,385 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 19 - Published: 9/17/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Failing Eyesight by xxliveforever17xx reviews
Sam/Andy fic. Sam hates the fact that he's growing older,and all that entails, but there is a rather big silver lining in his otherwise very dark cloud.
Rookie Blue - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,039 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/15/2010 - S. Swarek, A. McNally - Complete
Repercussions by lisalulu reviews
Inspired by previews for next week's episode "Big Nickel". Disclaimer: No rights to or ownership of Rookie Blue
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,778 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 9/13/2010 - Published: 8/21/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Blond Diversion by JhsGptMS reviews
Sam finds an unexpected supporter.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,236 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/10/2010 - S. Swarek, G. Peck - Complete
Locks & Bikinis by JhsGptMS reviews
Andy calls Sam and Dov hears only Sam's side of the conversation. Andy needs a little help but not the kind Dov infers.
Rookie Blue - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,435 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 16 - Published: 9/7/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
A Simple Request by xxliveforever17xx reviews
When Sam visits his sister, some surprising revelations come out. Slight Sam/Andy at the end.
Rookie Blue - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,095 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 9/6/2010 - Published: 9/5/2010 - S. Swarek - Complete
Moments in the Locker Room by xxliveforever17xx reviews
Like the title says, Andy and Sam share a moment in the locker room, but someone interrupts...
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,955 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 10 - Published: 8/31/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
A Night to Remember by xxliveforever17xx reviews
The newest cops of 15th Division decide to go out and have a night on the town to celebrate a very special occasion.
Rookie Blue - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,239 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/28/2010 - Complete
Happy Days by xxliveforever17xx reviews
On days like these, Oliver Shaw loves his job.
Rookie Blue - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 460 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 12 - Published: 8/27/2010 - O. Shaw - Complete
The Tent by tikvarn reviews
"Remind me again why I agreed to do this." - Sam/Andy, set sometime in the future.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 522 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 8 - Published: 8/27/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Lots of Tea by JhsGptMS reviews
Light hearted conversation between the 'friends' on the trip to Sudbury.
Rookie Blue - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 969 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/27/2010 - S. Swarek, A. McNally - Complete
He's Trouble But he is cute by JhsGptMS reviews
The humorous events that follow Traci and Nichole discovering Sam at Andy's apartment.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 959 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/26/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Stay by tikvarn reviews
What if Andy didn't leave after the lights came back on?
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 28,401 - Reviews: 177 - Favs: 235 - Follows: 95 - Updated: 8/26/2010 - Published: 8/13/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
Illusions of Death by xxliveforever17xx reviews
When tragedy rocks the 15th Division, Sam and Andy are left to pick up the pieces of their shattered lives.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,020 - Reviews: 89 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 8/25/2010 - Published: 8/19/2010 - A. McNally, S. Swarek - Complete
The Courtship by JhsGptMS reviews
Sam issues an ultimatum. Andy has to make a choice.
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,030 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/25/2010 - S. Swarek, A. McNally - Complete
The Answer was Both by JhsGptMS reviews
Sam & Andy finally talk about "the night"!
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,483 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 11 - Published: 8/25/2010 - S. Swarek, A. McNally - Complete
Judgement: Impaired by Greenstuff reviews
He'd had partners before. Male, female, rookies, veterans… but none had ever managed to get to him the way she did... Starts in the last few minutes of Episode 5. Sam/Andy Rating increased to T for violence and some language
Rookie Blue - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 8,092 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 7/27/2010 - Published: 7/24/2010 - S. Swarek, A. McNally - Complete
Profilers at Play by LostinOblivion reviews
Three days of paperwork leads to antics from two very bored, restless profilers. And, a highly amused tech analyst.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,216 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/13/2010 - D. Morgan, E. Prentiss - Complete
I Like It Rough by phoebe9509 reviews
This is the sequel to How Do You Like It...Hotch has a surprise for Prentiss
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,351 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 6 - Published: 5/24/2010 - A. Hotchner/Hotch, E. Prentiss - Complete
An Observation of the Interrogation Room by sotnas1999 reviews
Tony, McGee and Abby observe Kate and Gibbs.
NCIS - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,061 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/31/2005 - Complete
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ABC order! oneshots reviews
A collection of one-shots, each one based on a letter of the alphabet. Co-written by bookworm411. All one-shots take place after Breaking Dawn. May include some out of character moments. Rated T for minor suggestive adult themes. Enjoy!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,684 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 3/6/2011 - Published: 7/26/2009 - Bella, Edward
A Dog the bounty hunter story reviews
What happens when the Chapmans meet two of their unlikely soon to be lovers? who would have thought two 18 year old girls would end up joining the group? genres- humor, romance, general. rating T for now, probably will be changed to M
Misc. Tv Shows - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,809 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 2/26/2011 - Published: 2/20/2010
Unlovable by Law reviews
The Ryans get new neighbors, but they're not your average neighbors. All Time Low moves to MA 2 get away from annoying fans. When alex gets everything thing he wants, what happens when he crosses paths with Caroline? Ft. Alex, Jack, Rian & Zack
X-overs - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,621 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 2/26/2011 - Published: 8/10/2009
Race 2 Witch Mountain reviews
This is yes, another verison of Race to witch mountain, but with a little twist of romance. Rated T because, knowing me ill probably need the rating later on. Language or romance wise, but nothing too bad Seth x Taylor
Race to Witch Mountain - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 10,174 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 2/22/2011 - Published: 9/7/2009 - Seth