Swan's Catastrophe
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Joined 08-22-09, id: 2058275, Profile Updated: 11-10-12
Author has written 5 stories for House of Night, and Vampires.

“I believe in everything until it’s disproved. So I believe in fairies, the myths, dragons. It all exists, even if it’s in your mind. Who’s to say that dreams and nightmares aren’t as real as the here and now?” - John Lennon

Hey everyone! I'm Cassi- eighteen, and a tad insane. I always try to write something clever and witty in these things, and I always fail miserably, so let's try something different this time, hm?

When I like something, I don't just like it- I obsess over it. Current obsessions: Game of Thrones, American Horror Story, Mortal Instruments, Infernal Devices, and that's it right now.

Dislikes: Bullies, Math-any kind, the new ford mustangs (they're just ugly), people who are more bossy than I am.

Anywhoo, if you've got questions, comments, want me to beta for you, etc. etc. Just send me a message- I don't bite.

"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now." -- Goethe

When life gives you lemons, squeeze the juice in life's face and demand Damon Salvatore
Team Damon Salvatore, because secretly, I want him all to myself ;)
Come to the Dark Side; we have Damon- and cookies


(throwing a tree out of a forest in a wild display of power)
"I didn't like it there anyway."
- Damon Salvatore

(on the subject of Elena giving in to him)
ELENA; I'd rather cut my throat.
DAMON; An intriguing thought. But I can do it so much more enjoyably.

Damon: Can we not do the whole road trip bonding thing? The cliche of it all makes me itch

STEFAN; What are you going to do when they come after you?... Kill them all?...
DAMON; Why not?

Katherine: So, here we are: the brother who loved me too much and the one who didn't love me enough.
Damon: And the evil slut vampirewho only loved herself.

Damon: I look at you and I see myself. A less dashing, less intelligent version

Mason: I've heard a lot of great things about you.
Damon: Really? That's weird because I'm a dick.

Stefan: Maybe they're ninja turtles. Or zombies. Werewolves.
Damon: This is reality, and there's no such thing as werewolves.

Damon: You successfully cured him of anything interesting about his personality.
Elena: Remember who helped me.
Damon: I hate myself


"Have you fallen in love with the wrong person yet?"
Jace said, "Unfortunately, Lady of the Haven, my one true love remains myself."
"At least," she said, "You don't have to worry about rejection, Jace Wayland."
"Not necessarily. I turn myself down occasionally, just to keep it interesting."

"I thought I'd lie on the floor and writhe in pain for a while, it relaxes me" - Jace Wayland

"Don't order any of the faerie food," said Jace, looking at her over the top of his menu. "It tends to make humans a little crazy. One minute you're munching a faerie plum, the next minute you're running naked down Madison Avenue with antlers on your head. Not," he added hastily, "that this has ever happened to me."

"Hodge says he's on his way and he hopes you can both manage to cling to your flickering sparks of life until he gets here," she told Simon and Jace. "Or something like that."

"I wish he'd hurry," Jace said crossly. He was sitting up in bed against a pair of fluffed white pillows, still wearing his filthy clothes.

"Why? Does it hurt?" Clary asked.

"No. I have a high pain threshold. In fact, it's less of a threshold and more of a large and tastefully decorated foyer. But I do get easily bored." He squinted at her. "Do you remember back at the hotel when you promised that if we lived, you'd get dressed up in a nurse's outfit and give me a sponge bath?"

"Actually, I think you misheard," Clary said. "It was Simon who promised you the sponge bath."

Jace looked involuntarily over at Simon, who smiled at him widely. "As soon as I'm back on my feet, handsome."

"I knew we should have left you a rat," said Jace.

"Investigation?" Isabelle laughed. "Now we're detectives? Maybe we should all have code names."

"Good idea," said Jace. "I shall be Baron Hotschaft Von Hugenstein."

"A diary with no drawings of me in it? Where are the torrid fantasies? The romance novel covers?"

- Jace Wayland

"Go ahead and ask her. Then she can turn you down and you can fester in miserable humiliation."

- Jace Wayland (City of Bones)

"First, the candy and flowers, then the apology letters, then the ravenous demon hordes. In that order."

- Jace Wayland (City of Bones)

"Yes. I was trained to be an evil mastermind from a young age. Pulling the wings off flies, poisoning the Earth's water supply: I was covering that stuff in kindergarten. Good thing he decided to fake his own death before we got to the raping and pillaging part of my education or no-one would be safe."

- Jace Wayland (City of Ashes)

"His secrets? Oh yes, my father's terrified that I'll tell you he's always wanted to be a ballerina!"

- Jace Wayland (City of Ashes)

"It was like a bad movie except he didn't actually twirl his moustache."

- Jace Wayland (City of Ashes)

"Usually I'm remarkably good-natured. Try me on a day that doesn't end in y."

- Jace Wayland (City of Ashes)

"I dont want to be a man. I want to be an angst-ridden teenager who can't confront his own inner demons and takes it out verbally on other people instead."

- Jace Wayland (City of Ashes)

"I am a man and real men do not consume pink beverages. Get thee gone woman, and bring me something brown."

- Jace Wayland (City of Glass)

"When life gives you lemons make lemonade, and then throw it in the face of the person who gave you the lemons until they give you the oranges you originally asked for"
- Jace Wayland

"Have you tried talking to her?"

"No. We've been punching her in the face repeatedly. What, you don't think that will work?" - Jace Wayland

Seriously? How can you not love him?

My Men:

Tate Langdon
Jace Wayland
Will Herondale
Jem Carstairs
Jonathan Morgenstern
Damon Salvatore
Magnus Bane
The Joker (nolanized version)
Jonathan Crane.

Favorite Books:

Mortal Instruments
Infernal Devices
The Vampire Diaries
House of Night Novels
Dark Visions
The Forbidden Game
Blue Bloods
Night World
Bleeding Violet
The Summoning
The Awakening
The Reckoning
Fallen Novels (by Lauren Kate)
The Hunger Games
Trylle Novels
Glimmerglass Novels
Wuthering Heights

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

A Prince's Tale by trinity288 reviews
Prince Malfoy understands only one thing – getting what he wants. Bred to wage war and conquer any opposition, he is the opposite of everything Lady Granger believes in. But this won't stop the Prince from claiming what is his. Extremely DARK Draco.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 20 - Words: 74,501 - Reviews: 738 - Favs: 726 - Follows: 969 - Updated: 8/5 - Published: 5/18/2012 - Hermione G., Draco M.
That Listless Feeling by Calamity in Motion reviews
Idris has fallen. Valentine has risen to power and spared Clary's life for her gift. Unfortunately that makes her of interest to his son, and her true brother, who has taken it upon himself to twist her into something they can use. Warning: Incest
Mortal Instruments - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 34,689 - Reviews: 439 - Favs: 388 - Follows: 448 - Updated: 5/31 - Published: 1/13/2010 - Jonathon M./Sebastian V., Clary F.
Isolation by Bex-chan reviews
He can't leave the room. Her room. And it's all the Order's fault. Confined to a small space with only the Mudblood for company, something's going to give. Maybe his sanity. Maybe not. "There," she spat. "Now your Blood's filthy too!" DM/HG. PostHBP. Now complete with epilogue.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 49 - Words: 284,050 - Reviews: 17306 - Favs: 29,951 - Follows: 16,502 - Updated: 1/4 - Published: 9/2/2010 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Clockwork by HoistTheColours reviews
Upon stumbling into an abandoned apartment building, the Joker encounters a little girl.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 112,325 - Reviews: 1649 - Favs: 1,419 - Follows: 757 - Updated: 2/17/2017 - Published: 2/24/2009 - Joker - Complete
Bad Encounters with Vampires by xxMaddly.Riddledxx reviews
With his free hand he gripped her face gently, but with enough force to keep her from moving it. Without a moment's hesitation he crashed his lips to hers - After murdering her father with strange powers, Serena is thrown into a world of complete chaos.
Vampires - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 42 - Words: 104,917 - Reviews: 487 - Favs: 260 - Follows: 231 - Updated: 1/24/2015 - Published: 10/13/2008
Lucifer's Lover by Carina Pir reviews
Lucifer has taken a lover and he finds that their relationship is an unorthodox one. Mature sexual themes.
Bible - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,717 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 4/30/2013 - Published: 4/1/2009 - Complete
Sanctuary by tinparrot reviews
One Draco. One Hermione. Need I say more? A bantering take on what would happen if Draco and Hermione had to stay together in one dormitory as Head Boy and Girl. Dramione eventually.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 28 - Words: 71,369 - Reviews: 546 - Favs: 430 - Follows: 509 - Updated: 10/8/2012 - Published: 6/7/2007 - Draco M., Hermione G.
What The Cat Dragged In by psyche b. mused reviews
Helping 'damsels in distress' just wasn't his thing...he was more accustomed to distressing them in the first place. Unfortunately, Kelly doesn't know that... Victor Creed/OC
X-Men: The Movie - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 32 - Words: 202,736 - Reviews: 978 - Favs: 1,417 - Follows: 725 - Updated: 9/7/2012 - Published: 7/2/2009 - Sabretooth - Complete
The Breath of Lies by Calamity in Motion reviews
After being tricked into leading her friends to the slaughter, Mira is left with two choices; Become the plaything of the vampire who killed them, or die. As her world fills with monsters, she just might find herself becoming one.
Vampires - Rated: M - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 42 - Words: 199,558 - Reviews: 624 - Favs: 283 - Follows: 271 - Updated: 8/13/2012 - Published: 8/25/2009
La Cerise: The Sweetest Cherry by RZZMG reviews
Draco Malfoy visits a Masked Gentlemen's Club and meets a new courtesan making her debut - a beauty known only as The Princess. She's up for auction to the highest bidder, and Draco's determined to win her! Regency Era A/U. Draco x Hermione/Dramione. Story nominated and multiple wins at the HP Fanfic Fan Poll Awards-see profile for details. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 148,516 - Reviews: 1022 - Favs: 2,902 - Follows: 1,166 - Updated: 2/25/2011 - Published: 4/12/2010 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
To Muddy a Malfoy by foggybythebay reviews
Grieving over Ron's snogging of Lavender, Hermione discovers that it takes just one certain Slytherin to boost her flagging ego. A single night in a deserted corridor launches a thoroughly sensual game of cat-and-mouse that outlasts even the war HG/DM
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 78,505 - Reviews: 460 - Favs: 1,415 - Follows: 782 - Updated: 1/17/2011 - Published: 8/7/2009 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Face the Music by Calamity in Motion reviews
With her payments running late to GeneCo, Sage's only option is to accept a position as a Gentern. Now the psychotic Pavi Largo has his eyes on her, and His offer isn't as easy to swollow. Pavi/OC/Graverobber WARNING:Violence, Sexual Content, and Non-con.
Repo! The Genetic Opera - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 26,786 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 104 - Updated: 12/16/2010 - Published: 5/11/2009 - Pavi, Graverobber
Rebel by Roozu Doll reviews
As a trouble-seeking teen, Ava winds up in the deep end of problems when she's sent to live with the Darquecaster family as punishment. There, she finds herself surrounded by five males with a secret that could deem more trouble than she's worth.
Vampires - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 36 - Words: 88,391 - Reviews: 564 - Favs: 342 - Follows: 152 - Updated: 8/31/2010 - Published: 3/4/2010 - Complete
Part of the Plan A Sequel by Calamity in Motion reviews
Over the last year, the Joker has managed to find himself enemies, and not just with Batman. Unfortunately, being at his side has put Harley in the crossfire. She managed to survive before, but how long can she last this time, and with her sanity in tact?
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 28 - Words: 63,997 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 110 - Updated: 8/12/2010 - Published: 1/8/2009 - Joker
In Stitches by The Illegible reviews
They aren't made for each other. Oneshot. Harley/Crane.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,008 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/3/2010 - J. Crane - Complete
Vengeance is Written in Blood by xxdarknessxfallsxx reviews
There is a curse set upon the Lockett Royal family; every Lockett male shall die after leaving a successor. For years I've looked for a way to break the curse, what I found was a vampire who lusted for me in ways I'd never dreamed. Complete!
Vampires - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 35 - Words: 212,144 - Reviews: 306 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 76 - Updated: 4/2/2010 - Published: 3/21/2008 - Complete
Entwined Souls by Roozu Doll reviews
Sequel to Twisted. Karen Bernetta-Castillon is in love with Chandler, but she thinks the feelings are only one-sided. Not to mention a new evil is arising, and will test peoples hearts in ways they had never imagined.
Vampires - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 39,511 - Reviews: 156 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 2/6/2010 - Published: 1/17/2010 - Complete
Twisted by Roozu Doll reviews
Homeless and starving, Alexa Bernetta stumbles upon a "supposed" vacant, centuries old castle, only to find three, dangerously handsome vampires residing there. Rated M for later chapters.
Vampires - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 36 - Words: 82,514 - Reviews: 328 - Favs: 260 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 1/17/2010 - Published: 12/27/2009 - Complete
Leaving Me Behind by JadedFoxFire reviews
Walking a fine line between night and day, don't you think?" He asked, and I turned, angry. "Where I do and do not walk is none of your concern." He laughed, coming closer. "Oh, but it is..." Excerpt. Can Bethany pick up the pieces this time?
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,857 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 9/15/2009 - Published: 8/20/2009
The Becoming by Unlikely Rose reviews
“I am not turning you. Forget it.” I shrug “No way in hell. I’m sorry, this isn't an edict from Dumbledore or the Vulturi.” -Greek god gorgeuous, moody, vampire, my future baby's daddy. This basically sums up my love interest sitting across from me.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,635 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 9/2/2009 - Published: 1/28/2009
The Dark Night by John Milton reviews
If the Devil went to confession...long and good enough to be worth reading, short and bad enough to be worth reviewing.
Bible - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,906 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 143 - Follows: 22 - Published: 8/25/2009 - Complete
Seeing Red by Calamity in Motion reviews
Willow is attacked by a certain Blondiebear, but he decides not to kill her. Still haunted by their last run-in, Willow tries to deal with her tormentor, who has involved her in a deadly game of Cat and Mouse. Set during "The Initiative" and "Lover's Walk
Buffy: The Vampire Slayer - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 15,140 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 1/8/2009 - Published: 2/19/2008 - Spike, Willow R.
Ace in the Hole by Calamity in Motion reviews
Harley is the product of Gotham's rotting underbelly, and naturally her idolatry would lie with the creature that has struck fear in even it's protector. But when he returns her attentions, can she survive it? Nolanized version of Harley Quinn. Enjoy.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: M - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 53,571 - Reviews: 109 - Favs: 162 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 1/8/2009 - Published: 9/3/2008 - Joker - Complete
Vampire Bites Heart by loveAdelaine reviews
Adele Morgan is like any ordinary 16 year old human until she accepts an old man's offer of HALF A MILLION if she would come and live with him who also stated she was owned by him. So what happens when Adele arrives at the mansion to find deathly secrets?
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 22 - Words: 40,423 - Reviews: 363 - Favs: 140 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 11/28/2008 - Published: 8/30/2008 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Panacea reviews
Without warning, Reed crushed his lips to hers in a passionate kiss. Ending the kiss just as quickly, he pulled away, growling "Shut up" before continuing his shoveling. Hayley's soul belongs to him, but has he captured more in the process? R&R!
Vampires - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 25 - Words: 64,216 - Reviews: 366 - Favs: 226 - Follows: 122 - Updated: 10/25/2011 - Published: 8/18/2010 - Complete
Hex Hollow reviews
Cali is a witch with a problem. Demons are threatening the existence of her coven. Her mother is riding her about school. And she's caught the attention of an all powerful vampire. So more than one problem. What's a witch to do?
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 31,061 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 12/30/2010 - Published: 5/12/2010
Dark Intent reviews
Chloe has agreed to live with the two very handsome vampire brothers, Gabriel and Nathaniel Felling. But not all is as it seems in the Felling castle, and secrets threaten to destroy everything, if the other dangers don't destroy the brothers first.
Vampires - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 17 - Words: 31,463 - Reviews: 154 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 8/30/2010 - Published: 5/17/2010 - Complete
Renewed reviews
Nova was just marked, on her first day of school she's shipped off to Tulsa, which is in complete chaos. What does Nyx have in store for her new daughter? What will Zoey and the gang think of her gifts? Read on to find out! I suck at summary's, read on
House of Night - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 50,951 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 6/22/2010 - Published: 11/25/2009 - Complete
The Death Walkers reviews
With the help of a handsome, dangerous, vampire and a sadistic yet lovable Death Walker, Echo will have to rally the courage to face the secrets of her past and save the other side from massacre. While indirectly adding fuel to an explosive love triangle.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 52,934 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 6/18/2010 - Published: 3/27/2010 - Complete