Deany-Bob101
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Poll: What story should I take on as my main project now? Vote Now!
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Joined 09-01-09, id: 2069376, Profile Updated: 08-29-10
Author has written 7 stories for Twilight.


Hello Everone!

I am only new to this, so don't bash me too hard.

I refuse to give out anything about my identity because I am mysterious that way.

I have a number of different tastes in music, hobbies, books and such, and I may be found un-usual.


Hobbies: Acting ( for I wish to become an actress ), Writing ( only when I have an idea ), Art ( normally abstract ).

Instruments: I play cello, piano, a firery red bass guitar,I sing and take music theory lessons.

Books: Twilight Saga, Nought and Crosses ( all four of them ), Rebecca ( Daphne De Maurier ), Wuthering Heights and Angus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging.

T.V Shows: SUPERNATURAL!! ( That show rocks, I love Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki ), Smallville, Gilmore Girls ( for Jared ), Dark Angel, and Buffy The Vampire Slayer ( I may seen a little obsessed, I assure you, that is not the case... I hope.)

Movies: Ten Inch Hero, Devour, House Of Wax, Friday the 13th, Moulin Rouge, Angus Thongs and Perfect Snogging, My Bloody Valentine ( the way the girl is killed with a shovel in the mouth, hahaha ), and Fifty First Dates. Hot Fuzz is pretty funny too.

Music: Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Paramore, Muse, Killers, Kate Nash, Adele, Coldplay, Dido and the occasional Enya.


List your favourite characters in no particular order:

1. Jacob

2. Renesmee

3. Rosalie

4. Carlisle

5. Quil

6. Paul

7. Embry

8. Jasper

9. Alice

10. Emmett

11. Esme

12. Edward

13. Charlie

1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?

Paul and Esme! No, Yuk. Thats gross!

2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

Yeah, Carlisle is pretty hot. Not really my type though.

3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?

Edward got Jasper pregnant? HaHAHAHAHAh!!

4.Can you recall any fics about Nine?

Yeah, mostly about how Alice meets Jasper.

5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?

They would be alright, I suppose, but I prefer Renesmee with Jacob, not Paul.

6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?

Quil and Alice or Quil and Emmett? I dunno!

7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve making out?

Yuk! If I were Embry, I would run away to a mental health Institute if I caught Edward and Renesmee making out! That is so wrong!

8. Make up a title for a Three/Ten fic.

" My Knight In Shining Armour" ( Rosalie and Emmett)

9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?

Jacob/ Jasper? Not that I know of!

10. Suggest a summary for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.

How about this:

Embry tries to come on to a fully grown Renesmee, and Edward hurts him ( but there is no comfort in this story!).

11. If you wrote a songfic about Eight, what song would you choose?

Soulja Boy ( hehe!)for Jasper.

12. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?

Jacob/ Paul/ Edward? DO NOT READ!

13. When was the last time you read a fic about Five?

About a month or two ago.

14. One and Seven are in a happy relationship until Nine runs off with Four. One, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Eleven and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of Five and finds true love with Three while Thirteen watched it all and ate popcorn as if it was a movie.

Jacob and Embry are in a happy relationship until Alice runs off with Carlisle. Jacob, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Esme and a brief unhappy affair with Edward, then follows the wise advice of Quil and finds true love with Rosalie while Charlie watched it all and ate popcorn as if it was a movie.


Instructions:

1. Turn on your iPod, MP3 etc. and put the music on shuffle.

2. Answer each question with the title of the next song on the play list. Got that?

1.) How am I feeling today?
Mouthwash by Kate Nash. Well, that's helpful.

2.) Where will I get married?
Enterlude by the Killers. Sure. Why not?

3.) What is my best friend's theme song?
Up by the Saturdays.

4.) What is/was high school like?
In for the kill by La Roux. I swear it wasn't that bad!

5.) What is the best thing about me?
My Heart by Paramore. Aww, how sweet!

6.) How is today going to be?
We are Broken by Paramore. Well, that sounds cheerful.

7.) What is in store for this weekend?
Same by Snow Patrol. Looks like I'm having fun then.

8.)What song describes my parents?
Helena by MCR. I have no clue what that's suposed to mean, but I love the song.

9.) How is my life going?
F-F-Falling by The Rasmus. Oh dear.

10.)What song will they play at my funeral?
Supermassive Black Hole by Muse. Does that mean it wasn't that sad?

11.) How does the world see me?
Right Round by Flo Rida. Is that a bad thing? I can' tell.

12.) What do my friends really think of me?

A Dustland Fairytale by the Killers. So they like me!

13) Do people secretly like me?
For reasons unknown by the Killers. Does that mean they don't know why they like me?

14.) How can I make myself happy?
Thank you for the venom by MCR. Well, that's very helpful.

15.) What should I do with my life?
Fame>Infamy by Fall Out Boy. Hmmmm...

16.) Will I be happy?
Spotlight by Mute Math. Sure.

17.) What is some good advice?
Number 1 by Tinchy Stryder and N dubz. Gooood.

18.) What do I think my current theme song is?
Talk you down by The Script. Maybe I talk to much??

19.) What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
Money to be made by The Hoosiers. So they think they can get a cheap deal off me, eh?

20.) What type of men/women do you like?:
Violet Hill. Of course. That makes PERFECT sense.

21.) Will you get married?
Take me back by Tinchy Stryder and Taio Cruz. Hmmmmm, I wonder...

22.)What should I do with my love life?
Spiralling by Keane.

23.) Where will you live?
XO by Fall Out Boy. I dunno.

24.) What will your dying words be?
Why? by Busted. Haha! Good last words.

25.) Am I hot?
Breathe slow by Alesha Dixon. To prepare myself for bad news maybe?

26) What are your hobbies?
Disloyal Order Of Water Buffaloes by Fall Out Boy.

27)Do you like sports?
Embarrasment by Madness. Well, I didn't think I was THAT bad...

28)Do you talk a lot?
What Ever by The Rasmus. Sure.

29)Do you like books?
Manhattan by Kings Of Leon. If you say so.

30)Do you lioff.ke yourself?
Hometown Glory by Adele. Only at home? I love this song.


If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

Weird is good. Strange is bad. Odd is what you call someone who you can't decide what to call them. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which means weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

92 percent of the teen population would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this inyour signature/profile if you are one of the 8 who would be laughing your head off if everone else stopped breathing.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile!

90 percent of teens today would die if Myspace had a system failure and was completely destroyed. If you are one of the 10 that would be laughing at them, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you don't do drugs (They are nasty), copy/paste this into your profile.

If you like to write, copy/paste this into your profile.

If you've ever caught yourself questioning humanty's path, copy/paste this into your profile.

If you are an obsessive Twilight Fan, copy/paste this into your profile

If you are in love with a fictional charater from Twilight - whether it is Edward, Emmett, Jasper, Jacob or Carlisle copy/paste this into your profile

If you have a hard time believing that said character is fictional copy/paste this into your profile

If you think Jacob and Nessie are meant to be copy/paste this into your profile

If you are as clumsy as Bella (unfortunetley,I am clumsier) copy/paste this into your profile

If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you have EVER yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile.

If songs get stuck in your head so constantly that you know the words them copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it, put this on your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile. (Ohhh, many, many times)

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever spent too much time of the computer, copy and paste this to your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile. (Like the time a couple of years ago when I joined my old school, and as I was queing in the lunch line, asked if they did packed lunches!)

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!

If you have ever shouted a random thing and then gotten glared at copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you have a story in your head, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are a teenager, copy and paste this into your profile.


Girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.

Did you know...

Kissing is healthy.

Bananas are good for period pain.

It's good to cry.

Chicken soup actually makes you feel better.

94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.

Lying is actually unhealthy.

You really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.

It's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.

89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.

It's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.

Chocolate will make you feel better.

Most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.

A good friend never judges.

A good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.

Boys aren't worth your tears.

We all love surprises.


Fun things to do on an Elevator (These are very funny!):

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH one of the buttons and pretend it gave you a shock. Smile, and then go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.
23) Permanent marker fight!
24) Hum the "Spy theme song" then Ninja role off the elevator when it gets to your floor, shouting "I've got you now my pretty."
25) Wait for someone else to get on then when the door closes whisper "I've been waiting for you." Then get off at the next stop.
26) Randomly start screaming "The voises won't go away!"
27) Dance in the corner singing along to the music playing on your I-pod like you didn't realise another person got on with you.
28) Pretend your roasting marshmellows and offer anyone who gets on with you a smore.
29) When people get on the elevator welcome them to Narnia and warn them to watch out for the white witch.
30) ride up and down for no apparent reson just for the hell of it.

This is Bunny.

(\_/)
(O.o)
o(/_._\)o

Copy and paste Bunny to your profile to help him achieve world domination!

On the other hand, this is Kitty.

l、
(゚、 。 7
l、 ~ヽ
じしf,)ノ

Kitty is Bunny's nemesis. Or evil accomplice. Nobody really knows.

Either way, copy and paste Kitty as well, or Bunny will get lonely!


20 WAYS TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and
point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want
fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN".

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has
gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling
diamonds".

7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the
prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat - with a serious
face.

11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical
sounds all day at work.

14. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their
party because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock
Bottom.

17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won! I won!"

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot
yelling, "run for your lives, they're loose!!"

19. Tell your children over dinner "due to the economy, we are
going to have to let one of you go."

20. And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity . . .
e-mail this to someone to make them smile and laugh. Its called therapy


You know you live in 2009 when...

1. You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/LiveJournal/MySpace.

4. You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV.

6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.

7.As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

8. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling.

9. You think about how stupid you are for reading this.

10. You were too busy to notice number five.

11. You actually scrolled back up to check if there was a number five.

12. And now you're laughing at your stupidity.

13. Put this in your pro if you fell for it. You know you did


25 Things My Mother Taught Me

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25.My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"


I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was wtinrig. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

A Twilight Survey

Which book in the series is your favorite?

New Moon

How long did it take you to read the books?

Umm... only a day for the first one, but then I bought the other books separatley, so if you put the time together, it would equal about a week. I am a keen reader :)

Who introduced you to the books?

My friend was reading them, but I saw them for sale in a bookshop in Australia beforehand. I was contemplating buying them, but I didn't, so it was sort of me that introduced myself to them.

Did you buy them, borrow them, or have them given to you as a gift?

I bought them.

Favorites:

Who is your favorite character?

Renesmee

Who's your favorite vampire?

Emmett

Who is your favorite werewolf?

Jacob

What's one of your favorite quotes from the stories?

"Only a teenage boy would agree to decieving both our parents while repairing dangerous vehicles using money from my college education."- Bella, New Moon, pg 136

What was your favorite Bella and Edward moment?

The end of Eclipse, when Bella agrees to marry Edward.

What was your favorite Bella and Jacob moment?

When they go to the movies in New Moon

How about your favorite Bella and Alice moment?

When Alice gets Bella ready for the wedding in Breaking Dawn

What was your favorite adventure/battle?

The volturi bit in New Moon.

Which book cover was your favorite?

New Moon

Are these books among your favorite books of all?

yes

This or That?

Twilight or New Moon?

Twilight

New Moon or Eclipse?

New Moon

Eclipse or Twilight?

Eclipse

Midnight Sun or the Twilight Movie?

Midnight Sun

The Twilight Movie or Breaking Dawn?

Breaking Dawn

Who do you want to see Bella with most: Edward or Jacob?

Edward.

Who do you like more:

Bella or Edward?

Edward

Bella or Jacob?

Jacob

Bella or Alice?

Alice

Alice or Jacob?

Jacob

Rosalie or Alice?

Rosalie

Jasper or Alice

Jasper

Jasper or Edward?

Jasper

Carlisle or Esme?

Esme

Emmett or Jasper?

Emmett

Emmett or Jacob?

Jacob

Bella or Rosalie?

Rosalie

Esme or Charlie?

Esme

Charlie or Carlisle

Carlisle

Charlie or Billy?

Billy

Jacob or Sam?

Jacob

Sam or Quil?

Quil

Quil or Embry?

Quil

Who's the better villain: James or Victoria?

Victoria

Werewolves or Vampires?

Werewolves.


Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't quite as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.


In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos!
..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special)?

On a bar o f Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought?...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(and.. .I'm taking this because?...)

On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands."
(...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)


Here is the link for Kim's dress in the epilogue:

In case any of you want to know, this is the picture of Kim's dress, although I'm not writing it, but this is how it looks:

This are the links from my other story, "Falling Petals".

Renesmee's first day:

Renesmee's party dress: (chocolate strapless homecoming by Mori Lee if you are having trouble finding it)

Renesmee's party hair:

The cottage for Renesmee's family:

Renesmee's wedding dress:

Renesmee's wedding hair (this one went a bit wrong, so click on the little left arrow sign at the top of the picture -)


Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.


So, I've recently finished writing "Falling Petals", so I've put up a poll at the top of my profile about what I should do next. Please vote!


Thanks Everyone,

BYE

XXX

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

A Goddess on Earth by TheWhiteShadows reviews
Mary Sue, formerly Renesmee, always knew she was the most perfect person the world had ever seen. However, certain people might disagree, and as these heroes set out to rid the world of this horror, expect chaos, blood and VIOLENT CHARACTER DEATH to ensue.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,801 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 10/12/2013 - Published: 10/14/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
A Wolves Moon by Tinkerbella C reviews
Nessie is struggling to deal with her changing feelings for Jake when he disappears. Returning a year later he has gone feral and has forgotten his links to his pack, the Cullen's and Nessie. Can she help him remember who is he or has he changed forever?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 43 - Words: 168,475 - Reviews: 776 - Favs: 295 - Follows: 270 - Updated: 10/8/2013 - Published: 4/23/2009 - Jacob, Renesmee C./Nessie
Bring On The Wonder by Bronzehyperion reviews
Bella works the streets of Seattle as a prostitute. Edward is waiting to be ordained as a Catholic priest. Is there anything they have to offer each other? Or are there just sacrifices they both have to make… All human. Rated M for a reason. COMPLETE!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 62 - Words: 494,166 - Reviews: 3297 - Favs: 1,531 - Follows: 1,149 - Updated: 7/20/2013 - Published: 8/17/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
A May to December Romance by Positively 4th Street reviews
My name is Isabella Swan and today, I signed a contract that would put me in the steel tight clutches of a man I didn't know, for four years. A girl's gotta pay for college somehow, right? AH. Come meet 'Sugar Daddy' Edward.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 20 - Words: 142,603 - Reviews: 7794 - Favs: 8,324 - Follows: 9,935 - Updated: 8/16/2012 - Published: 1/7/2011 - Bella, Edward
Vanity and Patience: A Rosalie Hale Story by Achelle Candy reviews
How does the vain and selfish Rosalie deal with an irrational newborn vampire who can't see past his lust for blood to even notice her? Will she be able to swallow her pride and have the patience to stand by him? Will Emmett be the man who can change her?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 198,433 - Reviews: 412 - Favs: 297 - Follows: 188 - Updated: 1/1/2012 - Published: 4/16/2009 - Rosalie, Emmett
Resident Geek by cdunbar reviews
Geeky Edward thinks he has absolutely no shot with the popular, beautiful Bella. Is he right, or will she be one of the many girls who thinks geeks make for better lovers? M for language, sexuality, and some underage drinking. A little OOC...ok, a lot OOC
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 95,911 - Reviews: 5451 - Favs: 6,565 - Follows: 5,205 - Updated: 12/13/2011 - Published: 8/30/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Life Sucks and Then You Live Forever by Charlotte Webber reviews
Nessie's relationship with Jacob matures as she does, but it’s not easy. They must deal with war, loss, prejudice, tribal politics, and the unfathomable mystery of imprinting. A heart-warming saga sure to make you laugh, cry and swear before it’s over
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 67 - Words: 223,612 - Reviews: 2262 - Favs: 753 - Follows: 314 - Updated: 6/25/2011 - Published: 4/27/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob - Complete
Paper CutOuts by twistedcoincidence reviews
Bella prefers the virtual to the actual, but feels herself being tugged from the safety of her online realm into the world of a rough edged Edward. This time she'll write her own story. Collab with astilbe13 AH/AU
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 34 - Words: 136,587 - Reviews: 10179 - Favs: 6,201 - Follows: 3,653 - Updated: 2/15/2011 - Published: 5/23/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The sound of your voice by marie0912 reviews
A boy with a passion lost moves away with his parents in a desperate attempt to cope with his deafness and meets a girl who speaks before she thinks. Forks is a place with dark secrets that slowly unveils, the kids hiding both past, present and future.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 25 - Words: 53,519 - Reviews: 1649 - Favs: 879 - Follows: 1,046 - Updated: 11/7/2010 - Published: 12/1/2009 - Edward, Bella
Now You Notice Me? by karatekid917 reviews
I have a bone to pick with those teachers. They say you're supposed to come out of highschool with both intellectual and practical smarts. What will I end my 13 year school life with? A mark of 99 and unrequited love. Thanks Jared Thail.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 28 - Words: 35,946 - Reviews: 150 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 9/5/2010 - Published: 10/6/2009 - Jared, Kim - Complete
Wandering Star by Gina.N.B reviews
Renesmee is out on her own in the big bad world of vampires. Can the littlest Cullen survive alone or will she always need someone to save her?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Adventure - Chapters: 37 - Words: 153,076 - Reviews: 469 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 7/19/2010 - Published: 1/30/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
Freaks by IndependenceIndividuality reviews
Webster's defines a freak as 'a person, animal, or object that is oddly different from what is considered usual or normal. Abnormal; queer.' Well, screw them.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,242 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 81 - Published: 7/14/2010 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob
Undeniable by IndependenceIndividuality reviews
Riddle me this: a werewolf goes on the run with his half-vampire best friend/soul mate. Except said half-vampire has no idea she’s his soul mate and is in love with said werewolf’s beta. How long before he spontaneously combusts? Chapter 64 up!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 64 - Words: 318,149 - Reviews: 1609 - Favs: 547 - Follows: 349 - Updated: 5/7/2010 - Published: 5/16/2009 - Jacob, Renesmee C./Nessie
A Tale Told in Kisses by IndependenceIndividuality reviews
Four times Jacob kisses Nessie, and one time he doesn't. **NOW COMPLETE.**
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 23,374 - Reviews: 292 - Favs: 228 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 5/7/2010 - Published: 10/23/2009 - Jacob, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
Part of Your World by crackbabby reviews
Of three things I was absolutely certain. First: Edward Cullen was a mermaid. Second: There was some part of him, and I wasn't sure how potent that part might be, that wanted my guinea pig. Third: I was absolutely and irrevocably weirded out.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,275 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 4/11/2010 - Published: 8/29/2009 - Bella, Edward
Fault by ineedyoursway reviews
An awful event in junior high leaves Bella adrift and alone. Years later, she begins to recover with the help of both a repentant Edward and her new friend, James. Things begin to look up, but is everything as it seems? AH/DARK
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 31 - Words: 73,294 - Reviews: 3357 - Favs: 2,262 - Follows: 1,597 - Updated: 3/20/2010 - Published: 10/8/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Hands on Me by IndependenceIndividuality reviews
What do you do when nothing makes sense anymore? What if you’re forced to figure it out while you’re running for your life? What if the person you’re running with is the person who makes the least sense of all? A Jacob and Renesmee story. NOW COMPLETE.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 86 - Words: 393,420 - Reviews: 4532 - Favs: 1,280 - Follows: 584 - Updated: 2/23/2010 - Published: 2/24/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob - Complete
Unignorable love a Kim and Jared story by Chickedy-pea reviews
Kim started school only a year ago but instantly fell for Jared Miller. Gorgeous and charming but like everyone he ignores her. But after a year of obsession he finally speaks to her. Kims life is turned upside down and her family aren't exactly helping.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 87,922 - Reviews: 199 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 1/8/2010 - Published: 6/26/2009 - Kim, Jared - Complete
Forever and Always by Nervous.Laugh reviews
And I realise that the pain in my chest is actually my heart, and that I am not dying, I am just incurable. AH/AU/OOC.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 11 - Words: 6,924 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 12/28/2009 - Published: 3/27/2009 - Rosalie, Emmett - Complete
Bridging the Gaps by IndependenceIndividuality reviews
His daughter was always too original for a knight in shining armor.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,959 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 14 - Published: 12/26/2009 - Edward, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
Elysium by Harlequin Sequins reviews
She conquered him and he was a willing captive, yielding so easily beneath her gold-wrought gaze. Jacob/Renesmee. One Shot.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Spiritual/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,854 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 12 - Published: 12/2/2009 - Jacob, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
Wanna Bet? by Emmelie Cullen reviews
Emmett:Looks a Greek god would be jealous of and Rosalie:art freak nerd outcast both meet in a bet by his friends. "If you can change that girl to legendary social status you win" They told him. He thought it would be easy, until he found out it was HER
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 33 - Words: 61,573 - Reviews: 945 - Favs: 268 - Follows: 269 - Updated: 11/26/2009 - Published: 1/9/2009 - Emmett, Rosalie
The Trouble With Love by Wildwoodluver reviews
Nessie is all grown up and attending high school with her family. There she falls for a boy at school and Jake is crushed. He hasn't told her about him imprinting on her and is afraid of how she will react. Also old friends pay them a visit.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 93,420 - Reviews: 134 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 11/18/2009 - Published: 7/15/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob - Complete
Threes a crowd by tashaandjessi-twilightrocksxxx reviews
Nessie and the rest of the cullens are going back to high school. But what happens when Jacob goes with them bringing his girlfriend Leah along.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 29 - Words: 41,823 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 10/21/2009 - Published: 4/29/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob
Breaking the Impossible by Emmelie Cullen reviews
They told her it was impossible to live forever. She did. Impossible to find love that lasts for an eternity. She did. They told her it was impossible for a vampire to have a baby too... Rosalie Hale is about to make the impossible the extraordinary.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 49 - Words: 94,056 - Reviews: 960 - Favs: 265 - Follows: 199 - Updated: 10/2/2009 - Published: 1/12/2009 - Rosalie, Emmett
Withering the Ferns by AngstGoddess003 reviews
Isabella, infamous rich girl, meets Edward, the dark, mysterious guy from the wrong side of the tracks after an accident. Lost in the dense forest surrounding Forks together, they must survive complete isolation. Written for Gift Exchange.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 75,311 - Reviews: 1025 - Favs: 3,292 - Follows: 660 - Published: 8/6/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Unexpected Win by The Purple Sea Lion reviews
What the heck was his problem? The ass told me to cut my hair, try a little-make-up, and put on pants to hide my butt. Two weeks later he's acting like I'm his sun. I took your advice, now beat it! K/J
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 115,036 - Reviews: 227 - Favs: 153 - Follows: 165 - Updated: 8/5/2009 - Published: 6/29/2009 - Jared, Kim
Sweetly Addicted by LovesTheHeat reviews
A Jared and Kim story. “Love is as much of an object as an obsession, everybody wants it everybody seeks it, but few ever achieve it, those who do, will cherish it, be lost in it, and among all, will never...never forget it.” - Curtis Judalet
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 32 - Words: 123,223 - Reviews: 1510 - Favs: 572 - Follows: 364 - Updated: 8/1/2009 - Published: 7/13/2008 - Jared, Kim
Hurt by WinndSinger reviews
What if Bella wasn't beautiful when she first met Edward? Shy, scared, alone, and hurt Bella comes to Forks at the request of Dr. Carlisle Cullen, who thinks he can help her battered legs regain their strength when other doctors have failed.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 31 - Words: 181,024 - Reviews: 1568 - Favs: 1,779 - Follows: 701 - Updated: 1/25/2009 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Where I begin by hiri reviews
I do not know where she ends and I begin. It’s so hard to separate us since we are now one. One body and one mind. That’s how it is but it should be more. I have to find her somehow or otherwise I can’t live with myself. SunnyxKyle Oneshot
Host - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,350 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Published: 1/13/2009 - Sunny, Kyle O. - Complete
Music of the Roses by Emmelie Cullen reviews
Royce would get down on one knee and pull out a sparkling diamond ring. He would ask me to marry him. I would turn my prince down and run to Emmett. Not just my best friend. My true love. My soul mate. I would choose Emmett. My true happily ever after.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 39 - Words: 44,077 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 12/17/2008 - Published: 11/1/2008 - Emmett, Rosalie - Complete
A Smile That Explodes by m. diddy reviews
They always said that it would begin with the end. She never expected the end to break her heart. Sunny/Kyle
Host - Rated: T - English - Angst/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,282 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/17/2008 - Sunny, Kyle O. - Complete
Of Pregnancy and Accidental Love by Sunshine-M reviews
They got pregnant on an accident... A Sunny and Kyle one-shot.
Host - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,808 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 6 - Published: 9/7/2008 - Kyle O., Sunny - Complete
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Evergreen reviews
Bella is just an ordinary girl, with an ordinary crush on the most popular and handsome guy in the school. What happens when her friends conspire with her to break her out of her wall-flower shell and finally get her noticed? Read my atrociously sugary AH
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,776 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 8/6/2010 - Published: 5/16/2010 - Bella, Edward
When I Found Her reviews
What happens a werewolf imprints on a girl who he has never seen before? Will she want him back? This summary sucks, but I promise, the story is better I hope
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 20,587 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 8/1/2010 - Published: 10/17/2009 - Jared, Kim
Falling Petals reviews
Jacob and Renesmee are best friends, and always have been. What happens when something comes and rips them apart? WIll their friendship survive? All Rensemee's P.O.V, with some romance chapters between Jake and Nessie. I don't do non-canon relationships.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 48,916 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 7/31/2010 - Published: 11/21/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Jacob
The Meaning Of Love reviews
The story of the girl who will never fall in love. But will she? Read to find out- Leah/ Embry, I think. I'm not actually all that sure, though... hope you like! T for a bit of language...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 502 - Reviews: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/4/2010 - Leah, Embry
Through these smoky eyes reviews
Alice woke up alone in a strange world. Will she be able to find someone who completes her? T, because I think it's quite violent at the beginning. Hope you enjoy! :
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,996 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 1/4/2010 - Published: 12/29/2009 - Alice, Jasper
Rollonglitter and crooked teeth reviews
What happens when Bella meets her Prince Charming, but he's not how the book describes him? Ok, so my rubbish attempts at humour. I thought it was funny : You probably won't be able to understand it, as it jumps a lot, but anyhow : PLEASE READ! B P.O.V
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,095 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/29/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Smack Bam reviews
What happens to ordinary Kim when love lands Smack Bam in the middle of her world? What will her parents do? Will they stand in the way of their daughter's happiness for the sake of a bad boy?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 27,229 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 11/3/2009 - Published: 10/6/2009 - Complete
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