Author has written 4 stories for Naruto, X-overs, Rave Master, and Soul Eater.
Aloha Ladies, Gentlemen, and Horrifying Monsters.
This is BemmyBean here to say... well, actually I got nothing. Go about your business.
Bemmy on Sharigan:
At first the sharigan was totally legitimate. At first it just enhanced vision, even made it possible to predict and copy movements. No problem even if they can see it, if they can't keep up it doesn't matter. And then it let you see chakra flow so you could copy jutsu. Well alright, I mean just cause you can copy doesn't mean you can properly know how the jutsu works. Then it had a more advance form that included an insanely powerful ninjustu and unbreakable genjutsu. Okay I can deal with it. The genjutsu and ninjutsu both take insane moments of chakra and use gradually makes you go blind anyway. Oh and there is a third jutsu for the eye. A gigantic armor. Um, okay I mean this thing must take even larger amounts of chakra. And it has a shield that deflects all attacks. Uh, what? And a sword that will instantly absorb you and place you in a permanent genjutsu if cuts you even a tiny bit. Now wait a second. And now you can use both the armor (Susanoo) and super fire (Amatersu) for a friggin' hour at a time. Thats just ridiculo-. And if you take a relatives eyes you get rid of the blinding, gain immortality, get ability to store shit in a pocket dimension, and warp space-time. NO, ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. This is just to much. The sharigan went from a useful ability to a deus ex machina for letting bad guys survive.
Bemmy on FemKyuubi and Hinata:
These aren't necessarily bad ideas, just delicate ones. To many people just throw in Hinata just because they like Hinata. The most common scenario seems to be "Naruto I love you." "Oh Hinata I've loved you this entire time too, I just never mentioned it before ever." "That's awesome." Nobody sets up any background for her and Naruto to interact. Have them meet when they're kids. Have them work together on a mission. Have them go through something traumatic together. Anything that would actually establish a relationship beyond her following him around like a creepy ass stalker, while he remains thinking that she is a creepy dark girl. They can be a good pairing, its just that most people don't do it well.
This goes for FemKyuubi as well. Don't make Kyuubi a chick for no reason other then to have Kyuubi as a chick. And then make her fall in love with Naruto for no goddamn reason. Seriously, ESTABLISH A RELATIONSHIP. Have Kyuubi see or experience what he goes through. Break her out of Madara's genjutsu. Anything that gives reason for Kyuubi to love Naruto. And if you make Kyuubi a chick, then make all the other bijuu have human forms too. If she can do it then they can do it. Or at the very least make Kyuubi's reveal funny like Uncle Joe did.
Bemmy on OCs:
OCs are both a good idea and a bad idea. If you have an interesting character then share it. If your OC is a double SS or triple SSS ranked person then don't use them. Because chances are that they are retarded. There is nothing wrong with an S-ranked character. There are problems when you make someone so powerful that you have to make up stupid sounding ranks. If your character is so strong that they have a rank that is above literally everyone else in Naruto you should definitely not use them. There are exceptions to this rank. Like boss summons, gods, demons, etc. But if you are adding these then you better give Naruto a powerful summon or a major power boost.
Bemmy on Bloodlines in Fan Fiction:
You want to give Naruto a bloodline, go for it. But tell us where it comes from. His parents, Kyuubi, random mutation. All of these are fine. You want to do an original bloodline, again go for it. But do not make it stupidly powerful (see sharigan for reference of stupidly powerful) . And do not have him rely on it. For example elemental bloodlines mix two elements. So all you have to do is have him use the two elements along with the bloodline. It will add variation to your story and give you more room to develop unique moves.
Bemmy on Crappy Teachers:
Jiraiya and Kakashi were bad teachers. Kakashi taught Naruto tree walking and that's it. He ignored the fact that Naruto had literally no style of combat, which often resulted in him getting his ass kicked. He left Naruto with Ebisu, while he ran off to teach Sasuke more elemental manipulation (something that he said was meant for Jounin), insane speed, and chakra control. And what did Ebisu teach Naruto, water walking that's it. Kakashi couldn't have even left a scroll that said "here's some jutsu for you to learn" or "here's some elemental manipulation training" or "here's a way not to have everyone beat you up in hand to hand". I realize that Sasuke was fighting a homocidal maniac. And Naruto was fighting a family hating psycho who could take out Naruto's chakra and make his heart explode with a tap.
Now onto Jiraiya. He let Naruto sign the toad contract... and then threw him off a cliff instead of explaining summoning. He gave Naruto the balloons for Rasengan... and then let him figure out the rest while he spent Naruto's money. He took Naruto on a training trip... where he still neglected to teach Naruto hand to hand combat, elemental jutsu, sealing, or anything else that could be useful in exchange for, you guessed it, controlling Kyuubi (which Naruto still can't do) and more chakra control (and yet he still can't, or chooses not to, make a one handed rasengan). So these choices in training have resulted in a one trick pony who can only make clones and use rasengan or some variation of it. He knows pretty much no other ninjutsu, still charges in head first, can't fight close up (despite preferring a close ranged attack), and will always have to rely on sage arts. The same sage arts that require a person to stand still or use toads to use. But seeing as Naruto can't use the toad method he will have clones sitting doing nothing ALL THE TIME, just in case. But he has Kyuubi as back up. Oh wait, he's fighting people who can suppress Kyuubi. Nevermind, he's screwed.
Bemmy on Sudden Transformations
Why? Just why? I don't mean changes in wardrobe or slight changes in appearence. I mean sudden and pointless transformations. For example, fics where Naruto gets the powers of somebody and then is changed into an exact clone of that person. If you were going to change Naruto into a copy of somebody then why don't you just have that person in the fic. If make Naruto a copy of someone then he isn't Naruto anymore. My biggest problem; however, is the sudden addition of fox ears and a fox tail. WHY DEAR GOD WHY? A lot of people just add them to make Naruto look adorable, at least I thinks thats why. Some add them for increased hearing. The parts for hearing are inside the ear. Why would suddenly having fox ears make any difference for his hearing. Kiba doesn't transform his nose to smell better why does Naruto have to change so he can hear better. Lastly is for those people who add them to highlight the sudden fusion of Naruto with Kyuubi or some other bullshit. Kyuubi is a demon, not an actual fox (doesn't even look like one). Features that could be used to show a fusion include: red slitted eyes, sharp claws, deeper whisker marks, wild hair, pointed ears (maybe). Ears and tails serve no purpose other then to be suddenly added in a character description and then never mentioned again.