Author has written 10 stories for Protector of the Small Quartet, Harry Potter, Naruto, Katekyo Hitman Reborn!, and Dragon Ball Z.
I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve. But all the same...
I'm also on AO3 now, though I've yet to post anything:And also Nanowrimo April:
STORY UPDATE: March 27th 2015: Yeah... Kinda dropped the ball, I know.
Masks and Redemption: I've gone through (at last!) and completely rewritten chapters 1-4. I've edited chapters 5-8 for grammar. The rest is unchanged. HOWEVER, I do recommend rereading chapters 1-4 if you first read this story before March 2015, because there is new material there that is important to the story. Chapter 19 went up March 20th, and Chapter 20 is in the works but not near complete. Thanks for your patience.
Requiem for a Soul: Indefinite hiatus. Sorry.
Lonesome: Um. Sorry. Chapter 3 is in the works. I promise. I've written maybe 500 words of a 5000 total? Yeah. It's funny, because this is legit my best-planned fic and I know exactly where I'm going with it... and yet it's my worst-updated... (what is my life?)
Where the Heart Is: Currently on indefinite hiatus. I've received a lot of criticism, mostly warranted, and I feel that I need to re-think where I'm going with the story.
Phantom Footsteps: I'll do my best, but if I want to get anywhere with this I'll definitely have to do a rewrite of Chapter 1, and that's an unlikely thing with so many other fics waiting for completion.
Vigilance!: My Harry Potter muse is currently stuck on Masks. Sorry.
Tomorrow's Lessons: I actually don't know? I might continue this one over the summer, since the KHR! fandom are actually the most fun people ever, and the more time I can spend in their company, the happier I will be.
I'm seventeen, in my freshman year in college. I've been on FFN for almost six years now, since I was eleven. I like cats, books, ice cream, warm weather, and writing fanfiction. My dream is that one day, fanfiction writers will learn to spell and punctuate. I love fanfic recommendations, if you have any. I've pretty much given up trying to sift through bad fanfiction to find the decent stuff, so recs save me time. I usually respond to PMs but not reviews, but if you ask a direct question in a review, I'll do my best to answer it.
My Fanfiction Pet Peeves
Abso-freaking-lutely everyone knows that that A and B are destined to be together, except A and B themselves. And then, of course, A and B discover that they really are destined to be together, regardless of their former feelings. Really? Really, folks, if it's so freaking obvious that they're secretly in love- even when they constantly deny it- even when they have shown not even the remotest shred of mutual amiability- even if they don't really like each other at all- even if they don't really know each other at all- then why on earth haven't they caught on yet?
Naruto/Harry Potter discovers an ancient law that requires Naruto/Harry to marry more than one girl in order to 'restore the clan/pureblood family line', and eventually Naruto/Harry sees the sense of this and has hot, kinky sex with every female within twenty years of his age. What, really? Seriously? Seriously? No arguments from the girls (married or unmarried, often either) at being part of a harem? It just seems so incredibly sexist. Really? I find it hard to stomach that you can reduce every female under forty into a character who is okay with doing nothing but having (usually demeaning) sex with one guy, even when that one guy is having sex with thirty, forty girls. I'd say the same thing to reverse-harem fics, if they were remotely as common as regular harem fics. Please keep your awkward wish-fulfillment porn to yourself.
Beta Profiles that say, "i'm real good at grammer and spelling." I've seen this. Way. Too. Many. Freaking. Times. You can find something like this in at LEAST half of all beta profiles, sometimes more. Look, folks. If you can't spell, don't tell us that you can. (And I'm really hoping that you're aware of it, if it's that bad.) If you are good at grammar, but your weak points are commas and sentence structure and verb tense and punctuation, you are NOT good at grammar. If you don't routinely produce work of high quality, don't say that you can help others bring out their hidden potential. Because if you can't do it, there's absolutely no way you can explain to someone else how to do it.
Sakura realizes suddenly that Sasuke is a horrible person and that she should stop being a wimp and falls in love with Naruto. Where to start... It DOESN'T HAPPEN. You cannot possibly say that the Sakura we have in canon would suddenly do something like that unless something REALLY TRAUMATIC happened to her. We know for a fact that Sakura is STILL in love with Sasuke after he's tried to kill her and Naruto and Kakashi and everyone in Konoha time and time again. Because as unreasonable and unhealthy and ridiculous as her crush seems to you, the reader, she IS still in love with Sasuke.
Everyone loves Boy A. Everyone, that is, except for Girl B, who hates him unreservedly. Can the two find love? Hate these with a passion. Usually they're just an excuse to make such and such Mary Sue stand out from the rest of the fangirls. It's even worse when Girl B IS a fangirl in canon (Sakura, I'm looking at you) but the author doesn't want her to be shallow. Hence the hate. But really, the line between love and hate is a pretty freaking big one. When you hate someone, it is extremely unlikely that you will suddenly come to realize your error and make amends.
Sasuke falls in love with Hinata because she isn't a fangirl. So many things wrong with this, I don't know where to start. One: Hinata IS a fangirl. She fangirls over Naruto from the time she's about three. It's only her 'timid' character that makes her slightly less obnoxious than the others. I like Hinata, too, but I can acknowledge the truth. Two: the likelihood of traumatized, world-class jerk, revenge-driven, lone wolf, hate-the-world Sasuke actually stopping to engage in a relationship with a girl? Like, nil. This is only exacerbated by the fact that Hinata is not attracted to him at all. You really think he'd stop with the whole revenge thing to get to know a girl and then woo her? Keeping in mind, of course, that he barely even knows her.
It's Fine When Naruto Does It (aka Heroes Don't Count). Just what it says on the carton, folks. What's that? Naruto completely ignores the girl who's been crushing on him since Pre-K, stalks his love interest by attacking, detaining, and impersonating a classmate, repeatedly invades her privacy, shows obsessive behavior, smears profane graffiti on an ancient monument of his village, and has lamentable personal hygiene? Well that's not his fault! It was the villagers! They hurt his feelings offscreen! It's just a little childish attention-seeking!
If I were Sakura, I'd have filed a restraining order. And people start bashing her? For, what, telling him to get lost and leave her alone? I can think of some harsher things to say. And on that subject...
They Don't Deserve Him Anyway (aka Death to the Sidekick!) Namely, Ron Weasley and Sakura Haruno. Don't get me wrong, I have my own set of issues with these two. But when people go around bashing them, it makes me want to scream. Yes, they are by nature less competent than the tragic, gifted, misunderstood, virtuous heroes alongside whom they exist. That doesn't mean they should be obedient wimps who always side with the protagonist no matter how little they gain from him or how mistaken the Hero is.
Sidekick Scapegoating Or better still, when the Fanfic author wants to show how superior the New!AU!Hero is to the boring canon version, so they have the sidekicks make the same mistake as the canon hero did, and then the New!AU!Hero has to show off his wisdom. Like, say, when silly old Ron and Hermione just convince themselves that Draco is the heir of Slytherin, or that Snape is evil, and wise Harry is dragged along by their crazy antics. Or when Enlightened Naruto has to take charge and lead during the Bell Test, even when impulsive, disdainful Sasuke and Sakura argue ever-so-vehemently that fighting is really truly the answer.
Homophones, Godammit! You 'pore over' a text; you don't 'pour' or 'poor' over it. A hanger goes in your closet; a 'hangar' is a place for airplanes. Your interest is 'piqued', not 'peaked' or 'peeked'. Your appetite is 'whetted', not 'wetted'. And even if these are all too difficult for you, learn the difference between 'than' and 'then'. And for the love of God, don't write 'could of' when you mean 'could've'. Basic literacy, people. Learn it. Or get an editor. PLEASE.
Ron Hate/Weasley Hate. I don't understand this. I will never understand this. I don't want to understand the twisted minds that can turn a family of loving, kind-hearted individuals into manipulative assholes. I can only assume that people who write these don't give a shit about the Harry Potter universe. That is the only explanation I can conceive of for turning Mrs. Weasley into a lying power-hungry maniac force-feeding Harry love potions so he'll fall in love with her manipulative whore of a daughter, Ginny. You have serious problems if you think this is in any way okay. (Oh, and if you want to bring up the 'Weasleys are secretly a bunch of blood purists because they don't talk to their accountant cousin' argument? Canonically wrong. Read the damn books)
Reading-the-Books Fics. Okay, I'm guilty. I used to read these fics and sometimes I got a kick out of them. It's fun, sometimes, to see characters get a third-party view of their experiences. That said, it's maybe one in a hundred of these that's even tolerably written. The vast majority are just vile. It's lazy. It's almost always a verbatim rewrite of the original, with a few comments tossed in every few lines. Put some effort into your writing. The 'plot' of the meta reading is always cringe-worthy, and always the same. Especially if it's the Marauders. James is exaggeratedly flirty with Lily, who's exaggeratedly disdainful. Everyone hates Sirius all the way through book 3, and then when they realize it was really Peter who was the traitor they forgive him instantly after a quick discussion. Please, if someone actually finds one of these done creatively, let me know. It would be a welcome surprise.
The One-Upping Backstory. Okay, so you've got a canon hero. They've got a canon tragic backstory. Excellent. But not really. Because your AU hero needs to be better than the canon hero. So he needs a better backstory, right? Of course! So instead of making the Dursleys just really horrible people, you make Vernon a rapist and Petunia a knife-wielding psychopath and make your AU Harry about sixty pounds underweight and he cuts himself and tries to commit suicide. Much better! Or is your fandom Naruto? Well, then, clearly you can't just have Naruto be ostracized by the villagers. We need constant murder attempts (bonus points if it's by 'drunk chuunin' who call him 'demon fox brat' and try to kill him in dark alleys). We need malnutrition. We need horrible physical injuries and trauma and he tries to commit suicide too but the Kyuubi heals him. And more bonus points if his whisker marks are actually scars from more drunk chuunin! #completeanduttersarcasm
Default Ships. When you ship A and B because they stand next to each other in one scene. Or because you ship all of A and B's friends with each other for actual valid reasons, but you can't think of anyone you really want to ship either A or B with, so why not just stick them together. Because heaven forbid anyone come out of this single. (For a real-fiction example? Here's looking at you, Leo and Calypso.) This peeve isn't for deliberately creative ships or crackfics where the author is trying to challenge themselves by writing an unusual pairing and making it compelling. This is for those people who write romances where everyone has to be in a pairing so Neville and Luna get shoved together, or Neji and Tenten. Why? Let them be single and happy, jeez.
So I tripped and fell into my TV during a freak lightning storm on a solar eclipse at the eleventh hour, and woke up in Middle Earth/Hogwarts/Konoha/Namimori/fictionland! Just... why? It's been done over and over and over, and we're all sick to death of it. It's not interesting for anyone to read but you and your self-insert friends, and if I have to go through all of these fics to get to the actually decent writing I'm going to scream. I feel like this is the female equivalent of wish-fulfillment harem fics, only with less porn. Even when this is done creatively, with every effort of not making the characters obnoxious, it's just sad. Like, decent authors are wasting their time writing the same thing everyone else has been doing, instead of coming up with original stories and plots.
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