Author has written 2 stories for Star Wars, and Half-Life.
I am in my mid-twenties, determinedly single, and the proud surrogate parent of two amazing kids. I am a devout yet admittedly unorthodox Christian. I am a chain-smoking caffeine fiend who enjoys violent video games, angry rock music, and deep theological discussions. I am a college dropout twice-over, and I have an idiotic tendency to land myself in trouble (my favorite example being when I wrecked an ATV into an electrified barbed-wire fence - it makes for a hell of a story). And I am a far better reader than I am a writer - which is why you may notice a disparity between my published works and my favorited ones.
I also collect quotes and pimp their sources. You have been warned - feel free to skip to the end:
"I prefer to use my infinite imagination ... 'cause I ain't got no damn money."
~Meatwad, Aqua Teen Hunger Force
"The ability to bat plasma bolts around probably wasn't at the top of their list of things I was intended to gain from Jedi training, but let's face it: no one ever became a Jedi without thinking, at least a little, of the awesome factor."
"Is this how the slide to the Dark Side starts?"
"What, by crying on people's shoulders? Shit, no, I'm pretty sure I remember killing a bunch of people."
~DarthAmmonite, On Being a Sith Lord
"I think you mean 'I will kill the Rakghoul while Revan watches from behind the safety of the gate'," Revan corrected.
Carth turned to stare incredulously at him. "Seriously? He's a child."
"And I'm sure you're well up to the task of saving him," Revan replied. "Besides, I don't want to turn into a monster."
"You're walking a very thin line as it is," Carth muttered.
~Sarah1281, So Not My Problem
"Annoying trash compactor, meet whinging government lackey. I'd write a holo, but who'd watch when T3's the one with personality?"
~faelyn leaf, Joke's On Me
There was a pause before Carth said, “Sounds like Canderous has been right about a lot of things lately.”
“It’s a sign the Force is out of balance.”
~Lady Revan, Broken Promises
Mission pointed at the monitor. "Ha! I win! Alright!"
"That's five hundred for me as well," Canderous intoned.
"A bet I don't mind losing," Jolee said, reaching into a belt pouch. "Funny, Canderous, I didn't see you betting on love like Mission."
"I didn't bet on love. I bet on Revan. There's a difference."
~Sebastian DeLaOsa, A Friendly Wager
Revan (honestly having no memory of a previous meeting but knowing there must have been one): I spoke to you before? What did I want?
Rakatan Elder Councillor: Is this some type of test, Revan? Some type of trick? You came seeking our aid; you came in search of a way to enter the Temple of the Ancients. You claimed to be seeking a way to destroy the Star Forge, and we were foolish enough to believe you. Unaware of your true nature, we helped you enter the Temple. But you betrayed us, Revan. Instead of destroying the terrible legacy of our ancestors, you unleashed the evil of the Star Forge upon an unsuspecting galaxy. And now you stand before the Council of Elders once more. And once more we ask you: for what reason have you returned, Revan?
Revan: Uh... I need to get into the Temple so I can destroy the Star Forge.
~Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
“I wanna be buried. In dirt.”
“So burning is an absolute last resort? Why?”
“'Cause it seems like that's more likely to send me to hell.”
You're going to hell either way, Sheckley thought to himself.
“I see. Fine, then. I'll bury you.” Sheckley tried as hard as he could to keep a straight face.
“Not just any dirt, though.” Griggs said. “Sacred dirt.”
Sheckley sighed. “What makes it sacred?”
“It needs to have a pH of 0”
“Griggs, if dirt had a pH balance of 0, then it'd eat away at your flesh in a few moments. You know what else has a pH of 0? Battery acid. You wanna be buried in battery acid? Doesn't sound too sacred to me.”
~cheezburgerlover, The Griggs and Sheckley Oneshot Collection
(Regarding Gordon Freeman) "Worst. Luck. Ever. I can't be the only one who noticed this. 'Hey Alyx, we made it out of the evil zombie infested death pit of darkness, but... oh look! The gate won't open! Imagine that! What, you expected it too right off? You haven't been in this hero gig very long, have you?'"
~Pisces, Follow Freeman!
“The Aperture Science Enrichment Facility reminds you that if at first you don’t succeed, you fail.”