Stephanie Shortcake
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Joined 10-25-09, id: 2126106, Profile Updated: 02-03-14
Author has written 14 stories for Harry Potter, and Twilight.

About me: Hi, My name is Steph. I like deep, philosophical conversations that stimulate me intellectually. And dick jokes. I also enjoy being drunk. Get at me, bro. Lana del Rey is my Queen, just so you know. I like to be provocative, metaphorically and literally. I absolutely live for feedback, namely reviews because I feed off it. Bear that in mind. I am fucking crazy. But I am free.

http://queen-of-disasters.tumblr.com/

Quotes

"LIVE FAST. DIE YOUNG. BE WILD. AND HAVE FUN." —Lana del Rey
"I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It's probably the most important thing in a person."
— Audrey Hepburn
"I don't want to be alone, I want to be left alone."
— Audrey Hepburn
"It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all - in which case, you fail by default."
— J.K. Rowling
"It's not that I'm rebelling. It's that I'm just trying to find another way."
— Edie Sedgwick
"

Ten Facts about me that you probably didn't know:
1) I hate orange pop because of the calorie content and the after taste.

2) I positively love to act.

3) I love to write, but have a very short attention span on my stories. I'm getting better...

4) I am obsessed with Grey's Anatomy. I will marry McDreamy

5) I am extremely sarcastic and cynical to the point of being a bitch. But I'm quite comical.

6) I measure at 4'9, 95 pounds.

7) I'm not old enough to legally get drunk. Or vote.

8) If I was sorted into a Hogwarts House it would defiantly be Slytherin. It would never, ever, ever be Hufflepuff.

9) My favorite candy is anything gummy & sweedish fish.

10) Lana del Rey is my queen. I would go lesbian for her...and Mila Kunis, Blake Lively, and Kate Walsh. Oops..

The book weird question game

Directions:

Step 1. Choose 10 of your favorite characters from a book and order them from most favorite to least.

1) Hermione Granger

2) Draco Malfoy

3) Harry Potter

4) Bellatrix Lestrange

5) Lord Voldemort

6) Ginny Weasley

7) Fred & George Weasley (They're a package deal)

8) Ron Weasley

9) Luna Lovegood

10) Professor Severus Snape

Step 2: Answer questions with comments and whatever else you want added. Share with your friends and try a bunch of books.

Questions:

1.Have you read a one and four romance? Would you? Hermione/Bellatrix? No. Just...no, I couldn't.

2.What would be your reaction if six wanted to go out with ten? I am anti Hermione/Snape so Ginny/Snape would be worse. Gah.

3.What would be the description for an eight/three story? Harry/Ron Bromance slash.

4.What genre would a two/five/nine story be? Malfoy/Voldy/Luna would be a comedy. I think, because I could make it a comedy.

5.If 7 played a sport what would it be? Quidditch, duuuh.

6.Where would two and four go if they were dating? Draco/Bellatrix. That's incest my darlings, that's not good until you're from hillbilly heaven.

7.Do you know anyone who thinks 6 is hot? Ginny, hell yes.

8.Would you read an eight/five story? Ron/Voldy? Hell to the capital N-O.

9.What would a ten/seven story warning be? Snape vs. The Weasley twins? Warning! Extreme pranks gone wrong, do not try this at home!

10.Four is in a happy relationship with nine. Until nine runs off to marry five. Four is in a brief, unhappy relationship with eight until eight cheats on four with two. Four then takes the advice of one and settles into a happy relationship with three.: Oh my, Luna is in a happy relationship with Bellatrix. Until Luna runs off to marry Lord Voldemort. Bellatrix is in a brief, unhappy relationship with Ron until Ron cheats on Bellatrix with Draco Malfoy (her nephew!) Bellatrix then takes the advice of Hermione Granger and settles into a happy relationship with Harry Potter.

Yeah, and Voldemort is going to go plant flowers and give gifts to the needy muggle children. Uh-huh.

Sticky Situation Trailer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqTz5fj4uCE

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Why We Fight by Zephyr Seraphim reviews
An accident in Potions sends Draco and Hermione to the past where they meet a couple much like them. Hermione & Draco, James & Lily. Written before The Half Blood Prince.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 47 - Words: 109,368 - Reviews: 2459 - Favs: 2,283 - Follows: 2,237 - Updated: 9/5/2014 - Published: 2/9/2004 - Hermione G., Draco M., James P., Lily Evans P.
A Memory's Curse by fanpire.x reviews
With the Cullens gone, Bella can return to the Wizarding World for her Fifth Year at Hogwarts. But with a horrible DADA teacher, seven surprise guests, a new love interest and Voldemort growing stronger, will she make it through unscathed? *Bella/Harry - during NM and OotP*
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 35 - Words: 57,599 - Reviews: 752 - Favs: 720 - Follows: 640 - Updated: 12/24/2013 - Published: 7/15/2009 - [Harry P., Bella] Sirius B. - Complete
Renegade Killjoy by chaosbulldog reviews
Electric Revenge joins up with the Fabulous Killjoys as she survives in 2019 California. But as BL/Ind hunts them down, will they have what it takes to conquer the demons of their past and survive? Based off of My Chemical Romance's new album Danger Days.
Misc. Plays/Musicals - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 53 - Words: 92,365 - Reviews: 262 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 5/3/2013 - Published: 1/11/2011 - Complete
The Only Hope For Me Is You by FabulousxKilljoy reviews
Sequel to Save Yourself, I'll Hold Them Back. Diamond Dahlia is finally adjusting to life as a Fabulous Killjoy. But what happens when a new threat reveals itself from the most unlikely of places? Discontinued.
Misc. Plays/Musicals - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 15 - Words: 17,141 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 12/29/2012 - Published: 4/17/2011
Back Home To Family by Daerwyn reviews
Adopted from Xx-Dhru-xX. Edward leaves Bella, but she isn't who the cullens think she is. None other than Sirius Black finds her a month later on halloween telling her some devastating news, her twin brother is dead. James. Sirius/Bella S/B
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 29 - Words: 31,309 - Reviews: 192 - Favs: 407 - Follows: 183 - Updated: 6/12/2012 - Published: 7/22/2010 - Sirius B., Bella - Complete
The New Way by isabella13x reviews
Ember had a normal life. When she lost her mom, she was told that she was being sent to live with her mysterious father figure. She doesn't know anything about him, only that his name is Gerard Way. How can she trust him when he was never there for her?
Misc. Plays/Musicals - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 21,919 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 4/18/2012 - Published: 4/2/2011
Always By My Side by Tindra44 reviews
Gerard Way and Andrea Harrison have been best friends since they were six but something threatens to tear them apart... MCR fic. HIATUS
Misc. Plays/Musicals - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 40 - Words: 127,796 - Reviews: 167 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 2/27/2012 - Published: 4/3/2011
long road by team-damon-and-paul reviews
Edward leaves Bella shes a witch the daughter of Bellatrix and Voldemort... what happenes when Edward comes to hogwarts? will bella ind love what happenes when the dark lord gives her a mission she doesn't want?
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 14,845 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 177 - Follows: 166 - Updated: 12/29/2011 - Published: 7/13/2010 - Draco M., Bella
Planetary GO! by loki-dokey reviews
The tale of the true lives of the fabulous Killjoys. My Chemical Romance fanfic set in 2010 AND 2019 ;
Misc. Plays/Musicals - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 67 - Words: 83,135 - Reviews: 768 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 141 - Updated: 12/5/2011 - Published: 11/18/2010
You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison by AlterationLover reviews
MCR/Various other bands . They're all in Prison ! But life is not easy, especially for someone like Frank ... Contains course language and Mature subject matter .
Misc. Plays/Musicals - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Crime - Chapters: 10 - Words: 14,530 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 8/20/2011 - Published: 1/30/2011
Izzy Weasley by lifesuxthnudie reviews
What if when Edward left, he left Bella Swan but not Izzy Weasley. Now back at Hogwarts she must help Harry once again being the "girl who lived". HarryxBella
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 29,614 - Reviews: 133 - Favs: 227 - Follows: 223 - Updated: 6/24/2011 - Published: 10/30/2009 - Harry P., Bella
The Silver Romeo by Storm Blackheart reviews
The War is over and the Golden Trio are heading back to Hogwarts, hoping for a normal year. but what happens when Hermione and Draco are made Head boy and girl. on top of this Hermione starts receiving love letters. my first fanfic rating may change
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 38,965 - Reviews: 313 - Favs: 222 - Follows: 274 - Updated: 5/9/2011 - Published: 3/12/2010 - Hermione G., Draco M.
Finding love in the strangest places by The Mad Satin Hatter reviews
After Edward left Bella goes to Hogwarts, being Harry's twin she meets the rest of the gang. Falling in love agian wasnt part of the plan.The Cullen's return Will Draco capture her heart,and will she and Harry defeat Voldemort? B/D H/G R/H
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 24,807 - Reviews: 466 - Favs: 580 - Follows: 377 - Updated: 1/2/2011 - Published: 11/28/2009 - Draco M., Bella - Complete
Unavoidable by TStabler reviews
There are things in life that are uncontrollable. Falling in love is one of them. The person with whom you fall in love is another. Telling them you love them is controllable, but them finding out? Nope. E/O, Slightly AU, mentions of E/K, M/A, F/C
Law and Order: SVU - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 66 - Words: 144,778 - Reviews: 581 - Favs: 206 - Follows: 87 - Updated: 10/11/2010 - Published: 12/29/2009 - E. Stabler, O. Benson - Complete
I Keep Running Into You by DaWaffle reviews
Bella returns to Hogwarts after the mission to bring Edward to Dumbledore fails.She's still depressed from the break-up.But when she returns to find Edward back as a profesor, her life may change forever. What didn't Dumbledore say? Better summary inside.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 25 - Words: 45,442 - Reviews: 405 - Favs: 212 - Follows: 215 - Updated: 7/27/2010 - Published: 11/29/2009
Harry Potter Meets Gabrielle Delacour by KT08 reviews
Its the Triwizard Tournaments. Harry finally gets to meet the girl that survived with him. Little did he know that she would be the most beautiful girl he has ever seen. And now he also has to worry about suviving the tournament and whatever comes next.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,599 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 98 - Follows: 102 - Updated: 6/13/2010 - Published: 6/12/2010 - Harry P., Bella
The Boy and Girl Who Lived by KT08 reviews
What if Harry wasn't only one who survived the curse that killed his parents? What if the night Lily and James died, they were babysiting. This is the story about the children that lived.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,202 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 161 - Follows: 148 - Updated: 6/10/2010 - Published: 6/7/2010 - Harry P., Bella
Emmett Why are so you Stupid? by twilightgurl1026 reviews
When the rest of the Cullens are away Emmett,Bella,and Jasper will play! Harry Potter,Johnny Depp,and a fat monkey? Review!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 5,253 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 1/6/2010 - Published: 7/24/2009 - Bella, Emmett
Harry Potter and Bella Swan by HarryHermioneEdwardBella reviews
After the war, Harry wants to get away from England. So he goes to Forks, Washington. There he meets Bella, who just broke up with her boyfriend. They meet in the woods. H/B. Lemon.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,149 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 27 - Published: 12/11/2009 - Harry P., Bella - Complete
Splintered by Jessa4865 reviews
Life in general is not going well for Olivia. Being kidnapped only makes it worse. EO COMPLETE!
Law and Order: SVU - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 63 - Words: 181,067 - Reviews: 742 - Favs: 233 - Follows: 162 - Updated: 8/24/2009 - Published: 2/7/2008 - O. Benson, E. Stabler - Complete
Labor Of Love by obsessedwithstabler reviews
Suddenly an excruciating pain ripped through her abdomen, and she cried out in pain. No, no, this couldn't be happening. It wasn't time yet, and Elliot was at work. She was alone in the house. My 300th story!
Law and Order: SVU - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,431 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 8/2/2009 - Published: 8/1/2009 - O. Benson, E. Stabler - Complete
Say Goodbye by RJ O'Hara reviews
Olivia leaves for an undercover job and is presumed dead. Until Elliot finds her a year later, and learns her tragic, heartbreaking story. He brings her back home to build a new life with her. The entire gang comes back to welcome the new family. EO.
Law and Order: SVU - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 29,541 - Reviews: 293 - Favs: 115 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 6/15/2009 - Published: 3/15/2009 - E. Stabler, O. Benson - Complete
A Rape and A Pool Party by angelgirl88 reviews
Olivia is stalked,kidnapped,and raped. several weeks later the guys throw her a surprise pool party for her birthday.
Law and Order: SVU - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 13,135 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 11/17/2008 - Published: 5/9/2008
Abandoned and Deceived by Ms. Catherine Willmon 2015 reviews
Post 'Closet'. Olivia's pregnant with Kurt Moss's baby, but he leaves her. Elliot steps up and shows how much of a good friend he is. Feelings that they have kept hidden for so long will finally surface, leading them to a lifetime of love and happiness.
Law and Order: SVU - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 27,600 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 8/20/2008 - Published: 6/15/2008 - [E. Stabler, O. Benson] K. Moss - Complete
101 Things Not To Do At Hogwarts by The Fat Chipmunk reviews
Updated! The Weasley twins’ legacy has inspired some hopeful new pranksters – most of which include the socially unaware, mentally defiant, and of course, the tragically naïve. And since Filch has been denied his whipping rights…
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,775 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 346 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 8/1/2008 - Published: 4/3/2007
Sins of the Father by CathGilLove reviews
When a fouryearold boy is found in a home that contains a dead and mutilated body, the SVU are called in. The investigation takes them into a sordid and gruesome past, including the case of a missing model, child abuse and a reallife 'Sleeping Beauty'. 6.
Law and Order: SVU - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 43,970 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 7/15/2007 - Published: 2/15/2005
The Elevator by OverlyObsessedWithSVU reviews
Post Fault. Olivia has returned to the squad and at the strong request of Capt. Don Cragen has been partnered up with Elliot again. They haven’t talked very much since that day, but they still are the two best detectives on the squad working together. The
Law and Order: SVU - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 949 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 7 - Published: 8/10/2006 - Complete
A Little Story of Their Own by StablerSVUfreak reviews
With Sex crimes at an all time low,Munch and the squad write a FanFic of their own.
Law and Order: SVU - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 831 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/13/2005 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Sticky Situation reviews
Birth certificates are funny things. Sometimes they embarrass you with a name. In this case, they link a mother and a father together, via a son. Five years later, Hermione Granger falls into a coma, leaving her son in the hands of Draco Malfoy. Oh yeah, Draco just found out he was the father five minutes ago. Uh-oh. DM/HG, post DH, AU.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 19 - Words: 36,630 - Reviews: 284 - Favs: 207 - Follows: 516 - Updated: 2/1 - Published: 11/9/2013 - Hermione G., Draco M.
My New Roommate reviews
He was put in her room while on trial. Then he moved into house for a little while. He changed from the thorn in her side, to the shoulder she could cry on. He went from her new roommate, to her new best friend. How on earth did that happen?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 35,480 - Reviews: 169 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 163 - Updated: 10/19/2013 - Published: 3/29/2013 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Papa Don't Preach reviews
It's seventh year for Scorpius Malfoy and Rose Weasley.When one night goes to far they find themselves in a LOT of trouble.Now they face a unexpected teen pregnancy! Full Sum inside. R/S Review
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 17,235 - Reviews: 171 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 6/5/2013 - Published: 2/22/2012 - Rose W., Scorpius M. - Complete
Skills for Life reviews
Introducing Hogwarts newest course: Life Skills. Yes, that's right. Parenting, working, and marriage are all part of the curriculum. Is pairing enemies up as spouses part of it too? How is Hermione going to cope with Draco Death Eater Malfoy? Hermione is about to embark on a journey that may teach her a thing or two about real life. Read & Review!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 32,385 - Reviews: 325 - Favs: 187 - Follows: 250 - Updated: 5/5/2013 - Published: 6/2/2012 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
A Marriage Law reviews
A Marriage Law has been put in effect for witches and wizards ages 17-35. In order to preserve magical blood you are ordered to be married within three months and a child is to be brought forth within the next year. EWE, Full Sum inside. D/Hr H/G R/L
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 31 - Words: 37,656 - Reviews: 465 - Favs: 364 - Follows: 256 - Updated: 3/28/2012 - Published: 11/20/2011 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Storm reviews
Storm Isabella Black, aka Bella Swan. Harry Potter's best friend and secret crush. The other Chosen One. Sirius Blacks daughter. This is their story. New Moon, OOTP. Review & read! :D
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 36,602 - Reviews: 281 - Favs: 280 - Follows: 200 - Updated: 1/2/2012 - Published: 7/11/2011 - Harry P., Bella - Complete
Just a Dream reviews
"Baby, why'd you leave me, why'd you have to go. I was counting on forever, now I'll never know."- Just a Dream by Carrie Underwood.Songifc E/B. Character death. sad! review! :
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,086 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/25/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Manipulation reviews
Bella Swan is Emma Potter. Infamous twin to Harry Potter. Infamous manipulative, bad girl. Infamous Slytherin. Is she evil? Is she good? Death Eater? Read and review! *Used to be Infamous Control
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 9 - Words: 12,326 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 8/3/2011 - Published: 6/19/2011 - Harry P., Bella
The Way I loved you reviews
Draco/Hermione/Harry to Taylor Swift's The Way I loved You. The perfect Dramione in my opinion! One-Shot! :D REVEIW!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,603 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/10/2011 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Two Pink Lines reviews
Hermione Granger made a mistake with her enemy. Now she's faceing an unplanned pregnancy. Who will turn against her?How will it be labeled as the Pregnant Girl? It all started w/ two pink lines!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 15,766 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 6/13/2011 - Published: 3/26/2011 - Hermione G.
Imperfect in a world of Perfect reviews
Bella Swan is Tyler Potter, Harry Potter's twin. But she is a slytherin and hated by her brother and his friends. She is also alone in the world. left by everyone so what happens when the cullens show? read and review. Better than it sounds.!
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 10,801 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 3/26/2011 - Published: 3/6/2011 - Bella
Hogwart's Reunion reviews
Cliche reunion story. h/d. One shot. Hermione fled the W.W. after the war, and married Draco Malfoy. Imagine the surprise of everyone when she returns, married! How will friends she hasn't seen in years take the news? Read & Review.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,566 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 25 - Published: 2/6/2011 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Untouched Toxic Love Sex and Magic reviews
Megan Potter,Harry's twin is going to Hogwarts with him, Edward left her believing she was Bella. She is attacked and runs away. she meets people. Read along at the story of Megans life! Title is a mashup of songs R&R Ch 13 revised
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 23,218 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 2/6/2011 - Published: 8/31/2010 - Harry P., Bella - Complete
Cancer reviews
Based on the song Cancer by My Chemical Romance. Harry/Ginny... H/G have a kid. She gets cancer. They struggle with loss and regret. Could it have been prevented? Sad...sad story..with a happy ending. AU. Give it a shot...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,746 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 6 - Published: 7/18/2010 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete