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Poll: What title do you think I should have for my new story? If you don't like the title options, sned in your own; It's a Harry Potter fanfic about a girl and some crazy sh!t happens : Vote Now!
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Joined 11-18-09, id: 2149495, Profile Updated: 10-21-11
Author has written 3 stories for Harry Potter, Twilight, and Vampire Academy.

I love most vamp stoires

I love Harry Potter

I love vampire academy

I love house of night

And i just lost the GAME


What is the GAME you ask well.

- if you think about the GAME you lose the GAME.

- you can only lose the GAME every 30 minuets.

- and once you know of the GAME you have to play it untill you die.


Check out a new line from Burned!‏ the house of night book

strvie rae looked from

vampre to vampre

"here's a newsflash

. . . . Zoey isn't dead.

and believe me,

i know dead.

i've been there done that

and got the frickin' tee-shirt"


This is Bunny.

(\_/)
(O.o)
o(/_._\)o

Copy and paste Bunny to your profile to help him achieve world domination!

On the other hand, this is Kitty.

/l、
(゚、 。 7
l、 ~ヽ
じしf,)ノ

Kitty is Bunny's nemesis. Or evil accomplice. Nobody really knows.

Either way, copy and paste Kitty as well, or Bunny will get lonely!


Darth Vader- "Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!"
Luke Skywalker- "Nah, the rebels have cake."
Darth Vader- "ooh! Can I be a rebel?!"


RAVENCLAW
knowledge is power!
GRYFFINDOR
courage is power!
HUFFLEPUFF
friendship is power!
SLYTHERIN
power_ is mine!


THE LYRICS TO THE TIME WARP!!

RiffRaff:
It's astounding;
Time is fleeting;
Madness takes its toll.
But listen closely...

Magenta:
Not for very much longer.

RiffRaff:
I've got to keep control.

I remember doing the time-warp
Drinking those moments when
The Blackness would hit me

Magenta:
And the void would be calling...

Transylvanians:
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.

Narrator:
It's just a jump to the left.

All:
And then a step to the right.

Narrator:
Put your hands on your hips.

All:
You bring your knees in tight.
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane.
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.

Magenta:
It's so dreamy, oh fantasy free me.
So you can't see me, no, not at all.
In another dimension, with
voyeuristic intention,
Well secluded, I see all.

RiffRaff:
With a bit of a mind flip

Magenta:
You're into the time slip.

RiffRaff:
And nothing can ever be the same.

Magenta:
You're spaced out on sensation.

RiffRaff:
Like you're under sedation.

All:
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.

Columbia:
Well I was walking down the street
just a-having a think
When a snake of a guy gave me an
evil wink.
He shook-a me up, he took me by surprise.
He had a pickup truck, and the
devil's eyes.
He stared at me and I felt a change.
Time meant nothing, never would again.

All:
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.

Narrator:
It's just a jump to the left.

All:
And then a step to the right.

Narrator:
Put your hands on your hips.

All:
You bring your knees in tight.
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane.
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.


There was a blond who found herself sitting next to a Lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer just kept bugging the blond wanting her to play a game of intelligence. Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, and said every time the blond could not answer one of his questions, she owed him 5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her 50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blond reluctantly accepted.

The lawyer first asked, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?"

Without saying a word the blond handed him 5. then the blond asked, "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?"

Well, the lawyer looked puzzled. He took several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blond 50.00

The blond put the 50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, "What is the answer to your question?"

Without saying a word, the blond handed him 5.


47 Ways To Annoy a Non-Harry Potter Fan:

1) Relate everything they say to the Harry Potter books or movies.

2) Crowd their in box with Harry Potter related emails, make the subject misleading.

3) Give them Harry Potter merchandise for their b-day and demand they cherish it 4-ever.

4) Pretend you can do magic.

5) Yell "CRUCIO" whenever they insult Harry Potter.

6) If your late for something blame it on your broken time turner.

7) Sort every person you meet in to one of the four houses.

8) Say "Lumos" every time you turn on a light.

9) If your asked to retrieve something shout "Accio" loudly.

10) Refuse to wash your hair and explain you're going for the Snape look.

11) Spend hours at a time trying to make your broom fly.

12) Tap all brick walls you encounter with an umbrella.

13) Demand to know what exactly the function of a rubber duck is.

14) Carry around a hip flask and refuse to drink anything anyone else offers you.

15) Hum the Harry Potter theme all day long.

16) Talk to animals and insist that they're animagi.

17) Walk up to random people and ask if their initials are R.A.B.

18) Tell them that they're almost as smart as Grawp.

19) Refuse to tell them who Grawp is.

20) Whenever it gets foggy outside scream "The Dementors are coming!" and hide for days at a time.

21) Point at modern electronic devices and say "Look at that! The things these muggles come up with!"

22) Point and grunt and insist that your speaking troll.

23) Take them to a CD store and make them look for the new Weird Sisters Album.

24) Always speak with a British accent, especially if your not from the U.K.

25) Draw round glasses and a lightening bolt scar on every poster you come across.

26) Constantly compare them to Mrs. Figg.

27) Laugh evilly if they ask who Mrs. Figg is.

28) Complain loudly about how your pictures don't move.

29) Break any awkward silences by saying "How 'bout them Chudley Canons."

30) Say "Alhomora" every time you open a door.

31) Every time you see them demand an explanation of why they don't like harry potter.

32) Say everything in a sing-song voice like Luna Lovegood.

33) Shriek loudly and say that you're speaking Mermish.

34) If they ask you about the weather solemnly say, "Mars is bright tonight."

35) Pretend your under an invisibility cloak and shout "You can't see me!"

36) Knit them a maroon jumper every year, especially if maroon isn't there color.

37) Draw the sign of the Hallow on every surface in the house.

38) While playing chess with them, stare at your pieces and give them verbal commands.

39) Throw the chess board across the room when the pieces don't move.

40) When one of the movies is on TV remind them every five minutes.

41) Refer to random people as "You Know Who."

42) Start swatting at the air saying there's a wrackspurt around.

43) Ask them to help you stuy for your O.W.L.'S

44) Walk around bumping into walls explaining your looking for the Room of Requirement.

45) Run up to random men with long dark hair and scream "SIRIUS! always knew you were alive!"

46) Hog the computer when making Harry potter videos on youtube.

47) Tell them that You Know Who was defeated today. When they ask who's you know who pretend to be offended and don't tell them who he is.


Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts:

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropiate date to the Yule Ball

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insureance pollicy on Harry Potter

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show you the pointy hat trick

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after my lucky charms"

8) I am not allowde to start a betting pool on this years Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month"

10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand

11) I am not allowed to give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals

12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force"

13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work"

14) I will not you my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot

15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it

16) I will not lock the Slytherin's and Gryffindor's in a room togther and bet on which House will come out alive

17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Kinghts of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast

18) I am not allowed to declare an offical "Hug A Slytherin Day"

19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways

20) It is not nessisary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor

21) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort

22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy

23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling

24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-ful"

25) I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell

26) It is not nessicary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate

27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to potrol the hallways

28) I will not poke Hufflepuff's with spoons, nor shall I insist that their color's indicate that they're "covered in bee's"

29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge

30) I will not go to class skyclad

31) I will not use Umbridge's quiz to write, "Told you I was Hard Core"

32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm

33) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers

34) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the poition is acceptable as Body Lotion

35) I will not call the Weasly twins, "bookends"

36) I will not call the Patil twins, "bookends"

37) I will not call the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearnig an orange anorak

38) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine

39) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts

40) Tricking a school House Elf to strip of it's clothing does not make it mine. Yes, even when I yell out "PWND!"

41) I do not weigh the same as a Duck

42) I do not have a Dalek Patronous

43) I will not lick Trevor

44) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey"

45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween

46) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously

47) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions

48) I am not the King of the Potato Poeple and I do not have a flying carpet

49) "To conqur the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice

50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God


Teenager

1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
(Why wait that long?)
2) Thou shall not do drugs.
(Alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.)
3) Thou shall not steal from K-Mart.
(Wal-Mart has a bigger selection)
4) Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism.
(Destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this)
5) Thou shall not steal from your parents.
(Everyone knows grandma has more money)
6) Thou shall not get into fights.
(Cat fights anyhow...just start them.)
7) Thou shall not skip class.
(Just take the whole day off)
8) Thou shall not strip in class.
(Hooters pays more)
9) Thou shall not think about having sex.
(like Nike says, "just do it")
10) Thou shall not help old ladies across the street.
(just leave'm in the middle)


This is weird, but interesting! If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed erveylteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!Paste this to your profile if you can read this!


These are quotes I have found I think explains each house.

Hufflepuff
"People don't care what you think unless they think you care."

Gryffindor
"Stand up to what is right, even if you're standing alone."

Slytherin
“Winning means rising each time you fall."

Ravenclaw
"What lies before us and behind us aren't as important as what lies within us."


Hufflepuff: Accepts people
Loyal
Kind

Slytherin: Dedicated
Will do anything for a cause

Ravenclaw: Intelligent (I don't think this necessarily means show-off)
Witty
Smart

Gryffindor: Brave
Don't really think before they act

There is a ticking time bomb in a room.

Gryffindor- Throws self on nearest person.
Ravenclaw- Attempts to defuse bomb.
Slytherin- Looks for escape route.
Hufflepuff- Reassures nearest person.

-Plane crash lands in desert.

Gryffindor- Checks for survivors
Ravenclaw- Attempts to figure out location.
Slytherin- Scavenges the dead.
Hufflepuff- Draws help sign in sand.

-There is a suspicious cake on the dinner table.

Gryffindor- Destroys cake.
Ravenclaw- Analyzes the cake.
Slytherin- Makes nearest person eat cake.
Hufflepuff- Eats cake.


I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book.
I am the girl that people look through when I say something.
I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal.
I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face.
I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone.
I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain.

BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things.


You're Too Big a Harry Potter Fan when...

You mutter nonsense Latin words under your breath.

You call your least favorite teacher Snape.

Your computer says "You've Got Mail" and you run outside looking for an owl.

You actually ask for a broom for Christmas.

You mutter "lumos" under your breath every time you turn on a flashlight.

You sort everyone you meet into the four Hogwarts houses. (Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff and Slytherin.)

You were burned when you couldn't get through the flames of your fireplace.

You had to go to the hospital after you broke your nose running headfirst into the wall between platforms nine and ten.

You point a normal things like parking meters and say "Look at the things these muggles dream up!"

You try on every piece of silvery fabric your mom has to see if you turn invisible

Before getting up to get something, you always try to summon it first. Accio TV remote!

You were reduced to tears when you finally had book 5, 6, and 7 in your hands.

You refer to your Chemistry class as Potions

You spend hours tapping bricks in special orders hoping that a secret entrance to Diagon Alley will appear.

When playing chess, you yell orders to the chess players and get upset when they don't move.

You yell into the "tellyfone."

You get extraordinarily emotional every time you hear "Hedwig's Theme".

Despite being an American, you use the word "wicked" all the time because Rupert Grint does.

You get thoroughly overexcited every time you see a word somewhere that is distantly linked with HP (ie. Saint Hedwig's).

You name all of your pets after HP characters.

You know that Harry's birthday is July 31, 1980, Hermione's birthday is September 19, 1980 and Ron's birthday is March 3rd, 1980 even though it never said in the books.

You refer to Voldemort as "You-Know-Who", and your friends don't have any idea who you're talking about.

You were kicked out of the movie theater for standing on your chair, throwing your shoe at the screen and yelling "THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN IN THE BOOK!" over and over again, even for the most trivial differences.

You count the days until you're old enough for your apparating license, and everyone else thinks you're talking about driving


YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot.

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself.

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else.

After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffeine.

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

You have strange nicknames and can tell a detailed story about how you got them.


I know I'm not perfect,
I know I'm a geek, in many ways,
I know I listen to "Weird" bands,
I know I like to read,
I know I like school, even teachers.

BUT:
I know I have true friends,
I know I'm loved,
I know who I love,
I know I can overcome ups and downs.
And I know who I am.

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet,
And so are you,
But the roses are wilting,
The violets are dead,
The sugar bowl's empty,
And so is your head.

If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
If ya can't join 'em, bribe 'em.
If ya can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em.
If ya can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em.
If ya can't kill 'em, you're screwed.


37 Things to do in an Elevator

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at each floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.
23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26.Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell people that you can see their aura.
35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..."


16 ways to maintain a Healthy level of insanity.

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars, see if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put a garbage can on your desk and label it “IN”

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone is over their Caffeine addictions, switch to expresso.

6. Finish all your sentences with “In Accordance to the Prophecy”.

7.Don’t use any punctuation.

8. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

9. Specify that your drive thru order is “To Go”

10. Sing Along at the Opera

11. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme.

12. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

13. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream “I WON I WON!!”

14. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling “Run for your lives, they’re loose!!”

15. Tell your children over diner, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”


Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental
Hospital.

Please select from the following options:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2
for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and
6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you
want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be
forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a
little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which
number you press, nothing will make you happy ayway.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the
beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait
for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you
have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have
short-term memory loss, press
9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our
operators are too busy to talk with you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn
on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy
forever.

If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll
just mess it up.


Something else that i laughed at :D

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Frito's! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)


I loved this video! Took me ages to find the words to it too! But here they are! :)

Llama: Carl! There is a dead human in our house!
Carl: Oh..hey..how did he get here?
Llama: Caaaaarl! What did you dooo?
Carl: Me? uh..I didnt do this!
Llama: Explained what happened Carl!
Carl: I've never seen him before in my life!
Llama: Why did you kill this person Carl?
Carl: I do not kill people..that is my least favourite thing to do..
Llama: Tell me Carl, exactly what you were doing before I came home.
Carl: Alright..well, I was upstairs..
Llama: Okay?
Carl: I was uh..sitting in my room...
Llama: Yes..?
Carl: Reading a book..
Llama: Go on...
Carl: And, uh... well this guy walked in...
Llama: Okay?
Carl: So I went up to him..
Llama: Yes...
Carl: And I..I stabbed him 37 times in the chest.
Llama: Caaaaaaaaarl! That kills people!!
Carl: Oh, well, I didnt know that.
Llama: How could you not know that!
Carl: Yeah, I'm in the wrong here. I suck!
Llama: What happened to his hands?
Carl: What's that?
Llama: His hands. Why-why are they missing?
Carl: Well, I kind of um, cooked them up. And ate them.
Llama: Caaaaaaaaaarrrll!!!
Carl: I was hungry. And well, you know, when you crave hands...
Llama: Why on earth would you do that?
Carl: I was hungry for hands! Gimmie a break!
Llama: Caaaaaaarl!!!
Carl: My stomach was making the rumblies...
Llama: Caaarl!
Carl: That only hands could satisfy!
Llama: What is wrong with you Carl!
Carl: Well, I kill people and I eat hands, thats two things!

And here is number two

Llama: Carl! What on earth was all that?
CARL: I'm not sure what you're referring to.
Llama: You sunk an entire cruise ship, Carl!
CARL: Are you sure that was me? I, I would think I'd remember something like that.
Llama: Carl, I watched you fire a harpoon into the captain's face!
CARL: That sounds dangerous.
Llama: You were headbutting children of the ship!
CARL: That, uh... that must've been horrifying to watch!
Llama: Then you started making out with the ice sculptures!
CARL: Well, thank God that the children weren't on board to see it.
Llama: Uhh.. Carl why is the lifeboat all red and sticky?
CARL: Well I guess you could say it is red and sticky.
Llama: Caaarl, what are we standing in?
CARL: Would you believe it's strawberry milkshake?
Llama: No! I would not believe that!
CARL: Uhh, melted gumdrops?
Llama: No.
CARL: Boat nectar?
Llama: No.
CARL: Some of God's tears?
Llama: Tell me the truth Carl.
CARL: Fine. - It's the lovely elderly couple from 2B.
Llama: CAAARL!
CARL: Well they were, uh, they were taking all the croissant rolls.
Llama: I can't believe what I'm hearing!
CARL: I will not apologize for art.
Llama: Where are the other lifeboats?
CARL: Whoa! You won the prize, I didn't even notice that.
Llama: Where are the other lifeboats, Carl?
CARL: Looking at the trajectory of the moon and the sun, probably at the bottom of the
ocean. I bit lots of holes in them.
Llama: CARL!
CARL: I have a problem. I have a serious problem.
Llama: You are just, terrible today!
CARL: Shhh! D'you hear that? That's the sound of forgiveness.
Llama: That's the sound of people drowning Carl.
CARL: That is what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence.


One bright day in the middle of the night,
Two dead boys got up to fight.
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other.
A deaf policeman heard the noise
And ran to save the two dead boys.
And if you don't believe it's true,
Go ask the blind man, he saw it too.


Five Resons Why Bella's an Idiot:

1. She jumped off a cliff and didn't die.

2. She didn't kill Jacob for imprinting on Nessie.

3. What regular person uses the word irrevocably?

4. She can't win an argument with Edward unless its about sex.

5. She's a freaking spaz. (Yep)


Reasons why I Love Dimitri Belikov:

1)who doesn't love a sexy Russian?

2)He didn't impregnate his girlfriend (cough cough you shouldn't have done that Edward!!)

3)He's wonderful to imagine talking or being when no one is watching :D (naughty thoughts right here)

4)Dimitri can kick ass (yes i'm pointing at you Adrian)

5)He makes you love Russia so much that if you lived in the US in 1950's you would get shunned

6)Dimitri makes us all want to believe that Vampire are real

7)Dimitri Makes me believe in God (Russian God that is)

8)He's not a stalker like Edward and doesn't like watching people sleep when they don't know that they are there.

9)He's a ninja!

10)He makes you wonder what kind of dirty secrets would he have.

11)He makes you want to check out every single book that your library has about western novels.

12)He's HOT!


1.Do not introduce self as roleplaying character in public.

2.Do not talk to fictional characters in public.

3.Do not answer fictional characters in public.

4.Do not talk to inanimate objects in public.

5.Do not go out in public.

6.Disregard above note.Perform numbers 1 to 4.

7.Note expressions.

8.Don't die alone. Take many people with you.

9.Floor is slippery when wet.

10.Lake is slippery when dry.

11.Only talk to strangers you know.

12.Strangers you don't know are spies... Kill them all.

13.For legal purposes be sure to delete above note.

14.Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you.

15.Kill them for security purposes.

16.Crying does not solve anything. Try violent mood swings.

17.Make a scene whenever humanly possible.

18.The men in white coats are not your friends.

19.Ask them for a room with lots of sharp, pointy objects.

20.When that doesn't work, ask for a designer jacket.

21.Chicken soup, although good for colds, is not the best cure for drowning.

22.Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing.

23.Unlike fine wine, milk does not get better with age.

24.Always remember, um... um... Damn.

25.Train army of flying monkeys.

26.Goldfish don't like milk.

27.Do not maim people. If you already have, kill them to avoid lawsuits.

28.Find out who invented the word "pianist".

29.People are staring at you.

30.So act insane.

31.People are weird, but not as weird as me.

32.Do not taunt animals at zoo. They have feelings... And teeth.

33.Little people are aggressive. Stay away from little people.

34.Going through other people's stuff is a bonding experiance. Do this as much as possible.

35.You'll sometimes notice shadows late at night. Don't worry. It's only me... Bonding.

36.Never pet a burning dog.

37.Never make eye contact with a naked man. Especially if you are wearing a parka.

38.Naked men dig parkas.

39.Beware the naked man who offers you his parka.

40.You know what would look good on you?

41.Immolated cockroaches.

42.Don't worry. It's only a harmless pimento bug.

43.The size of Danny DeVito.

44.Making an amusing facial expression. Like this.

45.Numbers are evil. Count in clovers.

46.Stalking is fun. Do it more.

47.Make a large sign saying, "Look at me, I'm a gumnut tree!"

48.No matter what anyone says, there is a way to get to your fantasy world.

49.That way is rum.

50.Constipated people don't give a sh-t.

52.You cannot kill the snow.

53.The snow can kill you.

54.Grass can also kill you.

55.The leprechaun on the cereal box said I can't get his lucky charms...

56.Catch and castrate leprechaun.

57.HE is real... No matter what the men in white coats say.

58.Staple paper in the middle of the page.

59.In case of blank looks, laugh maniacally.

60.You are not haxxor l337 or an uberhacker or anything like that.

61.Pretend to be so around teh n00bs.

62.Do not go out with voice #7. He is a sadistic, soul sucking demon.

63.Disregard last note. Go out with demon. Who needs a soul anyway?

64.Ask Senior Diablo for a bigger pitchfork.

65.Remember to kill HIM...

66.Tell the small children in Toys 'R' Us that the dolls have an insatiable thirst for blood.

67.Note reactions. Avoid parents.

68.The blood of infants gives unholy superpowers according to Jhonen C. Vasquez. Test theory.

69.Scream, the doctors don't like it, they'll give you a shot of something nice.

70.Hide the bodies, otherwise peole ask embarressing questions.

71.Eat the evidence.

72.But not if it's broken glass.

73.When in the presence of someone much wiser than you, point in a random direction and yell, "Look, a distraction!" Then run.

74.Do not tell children that Santa is fat because he eats kids.

75.Disregard last note.

76.Note reactions.

77.On average, 100 people choke to death on ball point pens every year.

78.Stock up on ball point pens.

79.Learn to fly. Tell no one.

80.The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing.

81.Do not stick fingers into blender.

82.Blender... Bad... Ouch.

83.Blood loss is bad.

84.Find way to re-attatch fingers.

85.Scream as much as humanly possible at 2AM.

86.Answer every question with a question.

87.Ask people what gender they are.

88.Note reactions.

89.Refer to people as "mortal".

90.The Seagull From Hell is out to get me.

91.Kill all enemies in most disturbing way possible.

92.Start by drowning them in fire ants.

93.Find the creators of pop-up messages.

94.Kill them.

95.Brutally.

96.Teachers don't like finding notes on world domination.

97.Dunk head in boiling water.

98.Disregard last note. Was written by Voice #7.

99.Gullible IS written on the ceiling!

100.Investigate this whole "critical mass" thing when the klaxon dies down...


Why America has some issues

1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their
prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway
and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't
miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'

10. Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering.


I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that stuff up in two seconds. That's why when I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you".If you have ever heard of National Talk like a Pirate Day copy and paste this onto your profile.


In Remembrance:

…In Remembrance to Severus Snape….

….A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor…

...without all the red and gold crap.

…In Remembrance to Fred Weasley…

…Who fought bravely to the very end….

…And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half…

…And will loyally await his soul mate and brother…

… with many jokes…

...he's got forever to think of them, right?

…In Remembrance to Dobby…

…Who was more free and full of love…

...than any elf, and most humans.

….In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin….

...the last real Marauder...

…who was not just a wonderful father…

….a incredible husband and brave hero…

...as well as a freakin' awesome werewolf.

….In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks…

…who died for ‘the greater good’…

...and would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora.

…In Remembrance of Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody….

…who’s motto ‘constant vigilance’ kept him alive…

...and scared the crap out of some kids too.

…In Remembrance of Tom Marvelo Riddle a.k.a. Voldemort….

…who was pretty cool, and cute when he was younger…

…but who got his ass thoroughly kicked in the end

…In Remembrance of Albus Dumbledore…

…whose past and wisdom confused us…

…whose seeming betrayal shocked us…

…but actually who turned out to be an okay guy in the end...

...despite the whole 'almost killing Harry' thing.

In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange…

… because it’s was awesome how Molly slapped her with that Avada Kedavra!

She deserved everything she got and more.

…In Remembrance of Colin Creevey…

…who we really didn’t know too well…

…but took a lot of pictures and died fighting in a war…

…so he must’ve done something good…

…besides stalking Harry.

…In Remembrance of Hedwig…

...Harry actual first friend…

...who lived and died soaring.

the thing you just read is propriety of xINFRAxREDx but I agree with it all

Rest in Peace:

James and Lily Potter, Remus Lupin, Sirius Black (The True Mauraders) Nymphadora Tonks, Professor Dumbledore, Professor Snape, Fred Weasley, Colin Creavy, Dobby, Hedwig, Regulus Black, Charity Burbedge, Mad-Eye Moody, Cedric Diggory, Grindewald, Sturgis Podmore, Gregorvitch, Benjy Fenwick, Edward Bones, Gideon and Fabian Prewitt, Dorcas Meadows, Marlene McKinnon, Caradoc Dearborn, and all the brave other souls that were lost to the War against Voldemort.

May you all rest in Peace, and Remember you're never forgotten

To James and Lily,
Who died at the beginning,
To Remus and Dora,
Who will never know their son,
To Peter and Severus,
Who weren’t actually all bad,
To Dumbledore,
Who was as human as Harry,
To Sirius,
who was punished for what he didn't do
To the hundreds that died needlessly,
To the many that died 'for the greater good',
To these brave souls I raise my glass,
May they forever Rest In Peace...


Gryffindor (The biggest heros in HP history as far as we know):

1. Welcome to Gryffindor, a Weasley has probably slept in your bed.

2. Gryffindors: Brave to the point of Idiocy.

3. Gryffindor: Because we blur the line between bold and stupid every time.

4. The beautiful, the brave and the bold.

5. Gryffindor: I'll kick your ass.

6. I'm in Gryffindor, you're in Gryffindor- let's hug!!

7. Gryffindor: because we get enough exercise just pushing our luck.

8. No excuses, rule breaking is customary.

9. Gryffindors are attention whores.

Slytherin (The Junior Death Eaters):

1. We aren't all evil... yeah, we are.

2. Cunning and Ambition: Slytherin.

3. Go ahead, be a little naughty.

4. Slytherin: We have chained boys in the dungeons.

5. Slytherin: Because our common room is underwater (and that's cool).

6. It's not that we aren't better than you (except it totally is).

7. Why be normal? Or good?

8. We are Junior Death Eaters. Deal with it.

9. Slytherin: means never having to say you're sorry.

10. Seriously evil wizard coming through.

11. I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest.

12. Slytherins do it on Snape's desk.

13. Voldemort needs prision bitches.

14. Because real friends help you Incendio the bodies.

15. Property of the Half-Blood Prince.

16. We're only wearing black until something darker comes along.

17. Don't hate us beacuse we're beautiful, hate us because we kick your ass at everything.

18. Never wound what can kill you.

Hufflepuff (Some of the best people you'll ever meet):

1. I'm planning your death but in a happy way.

2. Brace youself- I'm going to hug you.

3. Nobody ever suspects the Hufflepuff.

4. You may be smarter, cooler, and better, but we still think you suck.

5. You think we're nice? That's cute...

6. Nowhere in the song does it say we're nice.

7. The love of a Hufflepuff was the only love good enough for Neville.

8. Hufflepuff: We kill you with smiles and rainbows.

9. All we got was Cedric... and that didn't turn out so good, did it?

10. Hufflepuffs kick ass too.

11. Hufflepuff: Formerly known as the party house.

12. Hufflepuffs know how to party.

13. Hufflepuff: We have cupcakes. Need we say more?

14. Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much.

15. Hufflepuffs are Particularly good finders.

Ravenclaw (The smartest house with the only ones who don't blow themselves up):

Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure.

1. I don't need romance, I have goldfish.

2. A room without books is like a body without a soul.

3. I can kill you with my brain.

4. Ravenclaw pride. Be afraid.

5. It's not that we are smarter than you (except it totally is).

6. I'm a Ravenclaw, which clearly means I am elligable to boast about my intellegence level in your face.

7. Ravenclaw: beacuse we know every insult in the book. (Get it, their smart and they know every insult in the book!)

8. Ravenclaw: geeks shall inherit the earth.

9. Ravenclaw: Dangerously over-educated. (Seriously over-educated.)

10. Ravenclaw: Tact enough for people who aren't witty enough to be sarcastic.

11. Ravenclaw: because everyone else is just dumb.


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Saving Hermione by LauraWeasley87 reviews
The Wizarding War may be over but the personal battles everyone has to deal with are still raging on. Hermione finally thinks she can have the happiness she craves but unfortunately, things go horribly wrong with the love of her life. An un-expecting friend, steps in to save the day. If you don't like OOC characters and non canon this is NOT the story for you!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 28 - Words: 38,346 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 4/15 - Published: 10/25/2014 - [Hermione G., Fred W.] Ron W.
Rewriting History by waterflower20 reviews
A year after Harry's death, Hermione receives a letter from Albus Dumbledore, giving her the key to change history. Along with Neville, and Luna, she travels back in time, determined to finish Voldemort once and for all, but none of them foresaw how things will turn out, and Hermione certainly never thought she'd fall in love with Sirius Orion Black.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 22 - Words: 97,932 - Reviews: 456 - Favs: 473 - Follows: 678 - Updated: 4/2 - Published: 10/19/2010 - Hermione G., Sirius B.
The Sacrifice by ElCullen reviews
"Ahh, Isabella" he said and I found my self looking straight into Lord Voldemort's red eyes… Edward left, Bella was changed but what if things took a turn towards the ultimate destruction? Bella and Edward OOC. Canon Pairings
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 68,709 - Reviews: 878 - Favs: 275 - Follows: 247 - Updated: 3/11 - Published: 4/18/2009
The Son of Lord Voldemort by VoraciousReader1369 reviews
Voldemort never killed Harry, instead he killed his parents and kidnapped Harry to raise as his own son against Dumbledore and the light. Dark/Slytherin Harry. Eventual M rating.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Family - Chapters: 24 - Words: 191,675 - Reviews: 1485 - Favs: 1,728 - Follows: 1,787 - Updated: 3/2 - Published: 6/21/2012 - Harry P., Daphne G.
Rewriting History by LoveIsAWitch reviews
When Hermione's life becomes unsufferable, she goes back to fix things. Back to stop herself from ever falling in love with that prat Ron. Back to her fifth year. Will she still fall for Ron or does another Weasley catch her eye? *NOTE* If you don't want to read any major Ron bashing, skip the first two chpaters. It won't effect the rest of the story any.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 34 - Words: 48,709 - Reviews: 353 - Favs: 391 - Follows: 708 - Updated: 2/24 - Published: 6/14/2012 - Hermione G., Fred W.
the final riddle by whitehoneybee reviews
Hermione will create multiple time lines in order to save Tom Riddle's soul and cure him of his inability to love.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 40 - Words: 71,582 - Reviews: 357 - Favs: 251 - Follows: 416 - Updated: 2/16 - Published: 2/20/2012 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr.
Serpentine Series by HarmonyB reviews
Hermione Granger is sent by Dumbledore to go undercover as a Death Eater for Voldemort. Living everyday in fear her true identity will be revealed, Hermione discovers Voldemort has big plans for her. [Hermione/Voldemort]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 81 - Words: 208,600 - Reviews: 630 - Favs: 440 - Follows: 553 - Updated: 2/8 - Published: 12/3/2010 - Hermione G., Voldemort
A Tick In Time by princessg101 reviews
Hermione goes into the past to help save the future. COMPLETED!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 46 - Words: 154,675 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 201 - Updated: 2/5 - Published: 8/27/2012 - Hermione G., Marauders - Complete
Bella of Suburbia by unicornninja12 reviews
From birth I knew I was different. It's not everyday that a vampire has a child, especially a female vampire that just so happens to be a doppelganger. Katherine has almost never been there for me and as for my father, Damon, well, I don't think he knows about me. This is my story.
Crossover - Twilight & Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 49,252 - Reviews: 323 - Favs: 310 - Follows: 393 - Updated: 1/6 - Published: 6/6/2013 - Bella, Damon S., Katherine
Bella's Sons by x.x.beth.x.x reviews
Edward left Bella pregnant, she had no where to go, so she turned to Volturi, and Became the princess and the most powerful vampire of all time, but what happens when her and her two son's move back to Forks and see a certain family?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 18 - Words: 21,818 - Reviews: 226 - Favs: 261 - Follows: 217 - Updated: 12/30/2014 - Published: 1/18/2010 - Bella, Edward
I have a Secret (OLD VERSION) by Silver Winged One reviews
THIS STORY HAS BEEN RE-WRITTEN AND RE-PUBLISHED. The new version of I have a Secret can be found on my author's page. It is titled exactly the same (minus the OLD VERSION stuff), and that version has an actual summary here and a book cover of a tiger with purple eyes and a wolf with blue eyes. Please go check it out! It's such an improvement over this story! It really truly is!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Drama - Chapters: 28 - Words: 114,238 - Reviews: 216 - Favs: 343 - Follows: 241 - Updated: 11/10/2014 - Published: 1/18/2012 - Bella, Paul - Complete
I'm Not Who You Thought I Was by Ebony'Wingz reviews
Bella Swan wasn't the beautiful klutz everyone knew her to be. No, not even close. She is Isabella Swan; Goddess of magic, detection and Demi-gods. When Edward leaves her in NM and Charlie dies, what is she to do? Helpless and heartbroken, Bella returns to Camp Half-Blood, as instructed by her parents, and encounters the one and only person she wishes to forget. Up for adoption.
Crossover - Twilight & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 13 - Words: 24,828 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 134 - Follows: 145 - Updated: 10/29/2014 - Published: 5/28/2013 - Bella, Edward, Annabeth C., Percy J.
His Yin, Her Yang by Tenshi Chupip reviews
TOMATO VERSE! A.U. When a law suit threatens to destroy W.W.W. Hermione is asked by the twins to defend their shop. Things take an odd turn when George suddenly sees the resident Know-It-All in a whole new light. Now if only he didn't irritate her to no end...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 30 - Words: 68,644 - Reviews: 301 - Favs: 256 - Follows: 496 - Updated: 9/14/2014 - Published: 9/22/2011 - Hermione G., George W.
Fatally Flawless by scarlettstones reviews
Being a goddess is fabulous and extravagant and... hard. Like, really hard. Some people are chosen and have always wanted such a life, but some never ever wanted that to happen. Bella Swan is no exception. Her rich and lovely life is taken away and replaced with monsters and demigods that she never knew existed. And who are her parents? Well, the oddest couple in Olympus, that is.
Crossover - Twilight & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 49 - Words: 65,362 - Reviews: 128 - Favs: 163 - Follows: 159 - Updated: 9/6/2014 - Published: 9/2/2013 - [Bella, Edward] Aphrodite, Hades - Complete
Gone Little Girl by Sinfully-Sweet-Demongirl reviews
Jasper's sister,Isabella,Isa, is in love with Damon Salvitore but something happens and she is gone.183 years later a girl named Belle is there but something is strange about her. Could she be Isa or just a new strange girl absolutley no one know.
Crossover - Twilight & Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 69,896 - Reviews: 142 - Favs: 192 - Follows: 209 - Updated: 7/12/2014 - Published: 10/5/2011 - Bella, Damon
A Hunters Heart by NevermoretheRaven37 reviews
We never knew much about Bella's past, apart from having lived with her mother in Phoenix and apparently having never loved anyone before coming to Forks. But what if she had? What if she had been a Hunter and had fallen in love with non-other than Dean Winchester? Things go a little odd from there and Bella may have to make a life changing decision. Adopted from XxShadowDragonxX
Crossover - Supernatural & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 19 - Words: 88,804 - Reviews: 300 - Favs: 373 - Follows: 489 - Updated: 7/3/2014 - Published: 7/21/2013 - Sam W., Dean W., Bella, Charlie S.
Légitimement Mariés by flute-player56 reviews
Marriage Law Fic. Fremione.Post Hogwarts,2000. Obviously Fred survived the Hogwarts Battle. Pairings leaning towards canon, but not entirely so. Read and Review.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 30 - Words: 42,678 - Reviews: 221 - Favs: 279 - Follows: 226 - Updated: 3/16/2014 - Published: 1/2/2012 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Bella the Dragon Keeper by TheGoldenWritersApprentice reviews
17 year old Isabella Swan is really 22 year old Bella Fenwick, Benjy Fenwick's sister. Her best friend is Charlie Weasley and she works with him and the dragon's in Romania. What will she do when the Cullen's find out that she's actually a Witch? What about the fast approaching War?
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 27 - Words: 42,613 - Reviews: 169 - Favs: 260 - Follows: 282 - Updated: 3/9/2014 - Published: 5/3/2012 - Charlie W., Bella
A Slight Mishap by sapphire-angel-gem reviews
Harry Potter knew something was going to go wrong when, as a punishment, Snape made him test an uncompleted ageing potion. Something always goes wrong. And he was right.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 86,345 - Reviews: 608 - Favs: 1,087 - Follows: 1,295 - Updated: 1/12/2014 - Published: 1/8/2006 - Harry P.
Part of the Pack by Wizards-Pupil reviews
Hermione is newly single and doesn't know where she belongs. George Weasley is just trying to learn how to work with being part wolf. The last thing either of them expects is for a nosey twin to step in and play matchmaker. Still, said nosey twin rarely cares whats expected. After all, who is afraid of a big, bad wolf? This is my return story and apology for such a long hiatus.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 54 - Words: 135,002 - Reviews: 1091 - Favs: 536 - Follows: 434 - Updated: 11/6/2013 - Published: 6/20/2013 - Hermione G., George W. - Complete
Fred Weasley in the World of Muggles by SophieSolemnlySwears reviews
Fred and George are failing Muggle Studies. They need to stay in the muggle world so they can pass their NEWTS, so what happens when Hermione Granger lets Fred stay at her house?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 58,304 - Reviews: 486 - Favs: 280 - Follows: 432 - Updated: 10/21/2013 - Published: 5/11/2012 - Fred W., Hermione G.
One Choice to Make a Difference by jlmill9 reviews
This is a sequel to my reading the Harry Potter books series that I did, where the marauders and Lily are allowed to have one memory from that experience to try and changer their future.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 165 - Words: 533,762 - Reviews: 2569 - Favs: 1,049 - Follows: 969 - Updated: 10/14/2013 - Published: 1/25/2010 - Harry P.
The Purest Pureblood by izzyblack87 reviews
What if Sirius Black had a daughter? What if she had the purest blood ever? What if she was only conceived as part of a plan made up by Voldemort? This is the story about Elizabeth Black and how she was the epitome of what Voldemort wished he was.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 20 - Words: 20,480 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 10/13/2013 - Published: 9/8/2011
veela life by jellybean1990 reviews
hermione finds out she is a veela
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 9,914 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 271 - Updated: 9/7/2013 - Published: 12/4/2011 - Draco M., Hermione G.
At Your Darkest Hour by patience-young-grasshopper reviews
She's Hermione Nott, slytherin, dark side supporter, and fiancee of Draco Malfoy. She's not what you think. DARK Hermione, ooc
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 35,488 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 126 - Updated: 9/3/2013 - Published: 2/29/2012 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
The Real Me by unofficallyalice reviews
The Salvatore Brothers travel to Forks with Elena, in an attempt to hide her from Klaus. What they don't know, is that when Katherine disappeared, she too, went to Forks, and changed her name. What the brothers and Elena find waiting for them, will shock them, and when the truth reveals itself to the Cullens and maybe the pack, all hell, just may break loose.
Crossover - Twilight & Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 18,326 - Reviews: 116 - Favs: 130 - Follows: 174 - Updated: 8/17/2013 - Published: 6/17/2012 - Bella, Katherine
Born Within the Supernatural by Cataleya Rebekah Salvatore reviews
Bella's father- Mayor Richard Lockwood-past away. She and the Cullen's go to Mystic Falls for a quiet, peaceful funeral. But she forgot to mention the Vampire's in town, the council's Anti-Vampire group, witches, doppelgangers and most important...family werewolves issues. OOC Bella/Edward
Crossover - Twilight & Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 16 - Words: 14,287 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 7/23/2013 - Published: 12/2/2012
Annoyance by Sammy1997 reviews
I woke up to a bright light. I opened my eyes slowly. There, in front of me was the Cullen Family. Set after Bella jumps off the cliff. She is the chosen one, hiding in Forks for protection. End of New Moon. Please Review!
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 13 - Words: 17,974 - Reviews: 121 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 168 - Updated: 7/8/2013 - Published: 10/12/2009 - Bella
The Case of the Creature Kidnappings by frostykitten reviews
"What your puny mind doesn't understand, Potter, is that she does the paperwork I hate, and I do the dirty work that grates on her Gryffindor sensibilities." Hermione and Draco have been partners working in the Department for Control and Regulation of Magical Creatures for years, but their comfortable partnership is shaken up when creatures go missing and the Aurors get involved.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 32 - Words: 102,746 - Reviews: 1097 - Favs: 1,331 - Follows: 665 - Updated: 6/24/2013 - Published: 8/9/2012 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Be safe, I love you by journeytomexico reviews
Hermione and Fred are separated by war, their relationship and recent engagement completely hidden from everyone. Terrified for each others safety both still have to play their separate parts.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 18,561 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 159 - Updated: 6/19/2013 - Published: 4/18/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W.
In Perpetuum by flute-player56 reviews
CURRENTLY BEING EDITED: Hermione is sent back in time to the Marauder's Era. What will happen when she does not have Harry around to provide information and clues about Voldemort? Some Lily/James, Remus/OC. Would love to hear what you think.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 57 - Words: 80,414 - Reviews: 418 - Favs: 648 - Follows: 321 - Updated: 6/19/2013 - Published: 7/7/2011 - Hermione G., Sirius B. - Complete
Petunia joins the Club by EbonyWing reviews
In canon, Petunia Evans wrote a letter pleading to be allowed into Hogwarts. But what if she didn't have to? How many lives would change if Petunia was a Witch too? Major AU!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 75,037 - Reviews: 502 - Favs: 401 - Follows: 529 - Updated: 6/8/2013 - Published: 8/9/2011 - Severus S., Lily Evans P.
Dark Daughters by voldyismyfather reviews
During the summer before 5th Year, Ginny decides to spent some time at Hermione's house, they learn the truth and fall in love Hermione Draco, Ginny Blaise - there is now a prologue added that wasnt there before
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,799 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 89 - Updated: 6/1/2013 - Published: 8/19/2009 - Hermione G., Ginny W.
The New Girl by Fire The Canon reviews
Tom never bothered to make friends with the other children in the orphanage, because he was different. And he thought he was the only one. That was until SHE came along. Rated T just in case. AU.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,751 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 5/25/2013 - Published: 1/6/2012 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr.
A Goddesses Tale by Mythology Lover 831 reviews
Isabella Marie Swan, isn't who she says to be. When a few siblings come to tell her that her five years as a mortal are up, she happily comes back. What happens when another war, the over baring Cullen's, and the Pack aern't the only problems?Being re-don
Crossover - Twilight & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,833 - Reviews: 220 - Favs: 196 - Follows: 216 - Updated: 5/24/2013 - Published: 5/28/2011 - Bella, Apollo
Time Orbs and Pregnancy by G. Novella reviews
Neville and Harry are freaking out about becoming fathers. When they take a time orb back to their parents seventh year, will their worries be assuaged? Can they handle the stress of seeing their parents and not being able to change a thing? And will their wives ever reach them? What about the ripple effect that is created just by their arrival? What now?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 24 - Words: 88,599 - Reviews: 227 - Favs: 193 - Follows: 255 - Updated: 5/21/2013 - Published: 10/10/2011 - Neville L., Harry P.
Character Complaints by clutzie-cutie reviews
A series of letters from characters to JKR and WB Studios concerning the movies. Chapter 39: Fat Friar.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 6,438 - Reviews: 202 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 4/18/2013 - Published: 1/11/2012 - Harry P.
Grindelwald's Daughter by Mariico reviews
Hermione Granger, the daughter of Gellert Grindelwald, is sent to Hogwarts on a secret mission. It doesn't take her long to meet Tom Riddle, who is just as curious about her as she is about him. Can Hermione keep her big secret, or is she just as doomed as it is? **CURRENTLY UNDER REVISION**
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 27 - Words: 257,801 - Reviews: 400 - Favs: 287 - Follows: 349 - Updated: 3/27/2013 - Published: 2/24/2012 - Hermione G., Tom R. Jr.
Amnesia by Kaien Brief reviews
A scarred witch is found in Hogwarts with no memories; no one has ever seen her before but for some reason when she sees certain people she knows that somewhere at some time she had met them before. A time travel story with a twist
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 30 - Words: 66,513 - Reviews: 351 - Favs: 193 - Follows: 371 - Updated: 3/26/2013 - Published: 2/29/2012 - Severus S., Hermione G.
Who said only kids needed Teachers? by avidficreader reviews
When Hermione lends a helping hand to George to take care of his kids, little did she know that the deal also included Fred.infuriating as he is,he's starting to grow on her.But can it be more than mere friendship?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 49 - Words: 102,573 - Reviews: 502 - Favs: 322 - Follows: 127 - Updated: 3/6/2013 - Published: 8/19/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
It's A Dangerous Buisness by fanficfanforev reviews
When George moves in with Angelina, Fred puts an ad out to find a flat mate. Living with someone other than George is different than Fred ever anticipates. He expected the cat hair, but the midnight chases and near death duels are a bit more than he bargained for. And that was before his emotions decided to show up as well.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,601 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 2/8/2013 - Published: 1/4/2013 - Fred W., Hermione G.
Google Thyself by LightSpectrum reviews
Hogwarts staff are forced to stay inside the school after a lockdown. Bored, they decide to try out the new magic-resistant computers. Fun ensues.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,834 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 2/2/2013 - Published: 1/29/2012 - Albus D. - Complete
Somehow Related by Rebecca Calzone reviews
Percy Jackson and Harry Potter are cousins. Percy, Sally, Nico, and Thalia visit the Dursleys. The Order comes and the demigods get involved. Set during OoP. I sorta screwed up PJO canon to make it fit.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 15,982 - Reviews: 230 - Favs: 350 - Follows: 510 - Updated: 12/23/2012 - Published: 11/15/2011 - Harry P., Percy J.
Chances Are by fanficfanforev reviews
Hermione woke up after the war with a terrible surprise. Her life is forever changed, and she is going to have to learn how to live with her new handicap. If her new life wasn't going to be hard enough, she also has to deal with rengades who believe that Voldemort's view of Muggle Born's were correct. Can she accept her new life and help a friend find healing as well?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 38 - Words: 93,694 - Reviews: 528 - Favs: 357 - Follows: 223 - Updated: 11/26/2012 - Published: 6/28/2012 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
93 Diagon Alley by pistachio gelato reviews
With her parents deciding to stay abroad, Hermione needs to find somewhere to stay before taking her NEWTs. Luckily, or maybe unluckily for her heart, Fred and George have a room and job offer. - A silly story told in bits with some help from The Beatles
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 77 - Words: 9,412 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 109 - Follows: 144 - Updated: 2/29/2012 - Published: 9/2/2011 - Hermione G., George W.
How did this happen? by Emo Girl 15-95 reviews
Fred and Hermione have an affair so what will be the consequences? My first fanfic so not sure what to write here read to find out more. I don't own Harry Potter
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 18,236 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 2/13/2012 - Published: 3/18/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Craving Curves by WeasleyForMe reviews
Fred is surprised to find how much Hermione has grown up since her days as the Gryffindor bookworm. He's even more surprised by how much he wants her. Hermione/Fred rated M
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 22,373 - Reviews: 446 - Favs: 695 - Follows: 472 - Updated: 2/8/2012 - Published: 1/28/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Uniting the Pranksters and the Prefect by CrazyClumsyCoco15 reviews
The twins get busted at 2 am by Hermione while she's on her prefect rounds, and she knows they're up to no good. Her mischievous side is itching her, though, and she doesn't know whether to punish them for disrupting the peace of Hogwarts, or help them with their troublesome plans.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,413 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/31/2012 - Published: 8/8/2011 - Hermione G., George W., Fred W. - Complete
That Boy Is Trouble by Andrew Joshua Talon reviews
Privet Drive is home to many secrets, many lies... And many sexually frustrated women. As Harry Potter soon finds out. AU Fifth Year, HP/HG/NT/Various, rated for general naughtiness. R&R
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 55,733 - Reviews: 1280 - Favs: 4,097 - Follows: 3,114 - Updated: 1/26/2012 - Published: 1/31/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Snipe by Wizards-Pupil reviews
The greatest adventure of Hermione's life started when she got lost in the woods. If she'd known how much trouble she was about to get herself into, she might have stayed home with her books. But then, Hermione had never been one to say no to a challenge
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 113 - Words: 266,273 - Reviews: 3947 - Favs: 1,598 - Follows: 669 - Updated: 1/15/2012 - Published: 8/16/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
The Truth Revealed by Azaelia Silmarwen reviews
This story is now mostly up for those who have already favourite'd it. Please check out 'The Exposed Truth' instead. [/s/10577338/1/The-Exposed-Truth]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 37,694 - Reviews: 226 - Favs: 697 - Follows: 385 - Updated: 12/30/2011 - Published: 3/17/2011 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
Pure by Hesaluti reviews
It turns out that blood is important! Pureblood wizards are becoming ill and the only thing that helps them is blood from Muggle Born wizards. Guess who Hermione's blood is matched to? Draco Malfoy of course! Lots of Draco/Hermione interaction.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 32 - Words: 58,889 - Reviews: 786 - Favs: 1,509 - Follows: 421 - Updated: 12/17/2011 - Published: 2/3/2011 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
The Unmasked Mystery II by Azaelia Silmarwen reviews
[To be re-written]. Harri and Draco are now in their 6th year. This year, Draco has been acting strangely and is keeping something secret from Harri. Will their relationship survive when she finds out the truth?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 75,525 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 137 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 12/9/2011 - Published: 3/31/2011 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
The Unmasked Mystery I by Azaelia Silmarwen reviews
[Currently being re-written]. What if there was still a wizarding royal family alive in Europe and what if everything we knew about Harry Potter was a lie? A cover up? What if Harry was actually a member of the royal family? WARNING: Male character becoming female.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 22 - Words: 60,899 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 373 - Follows: 183 - Updated: 12/6/2011 - Published: 1/4/2011 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Detention by DramioneFan-38 reviews
"I am not a Prude!" Hermione said "Really Granger?" Draco said as he smirked "Oh, I'll show you. What will I do to prove it to you then?" Hermione said as she crossed her arms. "Kiss me" Draco replied "WHAT?" Hermione asked outraged "You heard me Granger"
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 940 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 12 - Published: 12/2/2011 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Gred and Forge read the epilogue by Chibi Ven reviews
Gred and Forge read the Deathly Hallows epilogue.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,466 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 11/23/2011 - Published: 8/3/2011 - Fred W., George W.
Remembrance Bracelets by DramioneFan-38 reviews
"I'm Hermione Granger! but my Mum and Dad call me Mione" said Hermione the 6 yr old girl while extending her hand "Um.. I'm Draco Malfoy. You can call me Draco" Draco said while taking Hermione's little hand in his own and shaking it.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,136 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 26 - Published: 11/3/2011 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Please teach me gently how to breathe by Desireforwords reviews
The one who sees you as you stand all alone. Fremione. Image: Joycee - Unnaturallittlebeast at Tumblr
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 13 - Words: 13,117 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 10/13/2011 - Published: 8/15/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
The Ghost of Rochester by CooLibrarian reviews
Rosalie returns to her hometown with Emmett to find her disapperance has become a ledgend and someone has been waiting for her.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Supernatural - Chapters: 18 - Words: 45,194 - Reviews: 106 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 10/4/2011 - Published: 12/16/2009 - Rosalie, Emmett
He Had Such A Cheeky Grin by Evil People's Underwear reviews
Following on from the final battle, sparks fly between Fred and Hermione. Why can everyone see it but them? Maybe all they need is a little push in the right direction...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 37,713 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 230 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 10/4/2011 - Published: 9/11/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Something Left Unfinished by Weasley Genetics reviews
After the war, the last thing Hermione Granger expected to find when she went to her parent's old house, was the ghost of Fred Weasley.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,959 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 9/26/2011 - Published: 9/4/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
The Surprise from the Present by x-greeneyesy-x reviews
Follow Draco and Hermione's life as they welcome their first child into their life and adapt to being young parents. Sequel to Surprise from the Future.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 13 - Words: 13,266 - Reviews: 210 - Favs: 238 - Follows: 188 - Updated: 9/21/2011 - Published: 12/5/2010 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Chocolate Frogs by Dimcairien reviews
Join several of the Harry Potter characters as they eat through chocolate frogs and discover cards that they didn't know existed. Multiple one-shots. Post DH. Spoilers. Idea's for certain people finding certain cards are welcome. Leave it in a review.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 14 - Words: 12,552 - Reviews: 145 - Favs: 175 - Follows: 160 - Updated: 9/14/2011 - Published: 7/5/2010
Taste the Rainbow by dontforget2live reviews
Involving Lily, James, being bored and a bag of Muggle Skittles. Fluffy and humorous one-shot. Rated T because I'm paranoid and the sentence involving the title... Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 362 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/13/2011 - [James P., Lily Evans P.] - Complete
Good Times by inkvoices reviews
A party at the Leaky Cauldron carries on at 93 Diagon Alley.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 805 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/13/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Product Testing by weasleyFOEVA reviews
Hermione agrees to help Fred with some product testing, what will become of it?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 893 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 7 - Published: 9/11/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Roaming the Corridors by TimeIsGalleons reviews
Hermione's out doing her nighttime patrols as part of her prefect duties when she runs into someone who definitely shouldn't be there. After quite a bit of annoying banter, she finds out something that even leaves her speechless. All dialogue. One-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 584 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/11/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Everyone Needs a Sick day by Misty598 reviews
Hermione's sick, and Fred and George are left to take care of her, what will happen?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,055 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 10 - Published: 9/10/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
How To Name Your Baby Without Being Cursed by LiliaCupcake376 reviews
Second upload, but similarly awesome. read full summary on SlytherinQueen83's page.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,572 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/9/2011 - Fred W., Hermione G. - Complete
Chocolate frog cards by blueisasome reviews
Ron waits for his chocolate frog card all night. He learns something about himself in the process.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 639 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/25/2011 - Ron W. - Complete
Girls get there own back by Mystery Girl 01 reviews
The boys insult the girls. Its time for Rose, Alice and Bella to take action but what have they got instore for the boys? Rated M for lemons and mature theams. OOC LEMONS LEMONS LEMONS LEMONS LEMONS LEMONS LEMONS LEMONS LEMONS LEMONS and a few more LEMONS
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 14,478 - Reviews: 351 - Favs: 408 - Follows: 447 - Updated: 8/23/2011 - Published: 3/19/2010 - Edward, Bella
Tale as Old as Time by Wizards-Pupil reviews
Fred went into a coma after the Battle. He was unconscious for days, and when he woke up he believed in a world that didn't exist. One that will forever change his and Hermione's life. "If he says something barmy you want us to go with it?" "Precisely!"
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 32 - Words: 71,307 - Reviews: 1246 - Favs: 1,235 - Follows: 452 - Updated: 8/15/2011 - Published: 7/15/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Red and Green by Violet Teardrops reviews
"Hey, Draco, notice the Christmas colors?" I asked. "Red and Green?" "Yeah...notice anything about them?" "They're Christmas-y?" I laughed at the term. "No, silly...They're Gryffindor and Slytherin." Re written yet again.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,523 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 8/10/2011 - Published: 12/17/2010 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Enchanted by Violet Teardrops reviews
After a bad break-up with Ron, what happens when Hermione meets someone she thought she'd never see again at a batch reunion? Based on the song "Enchanted" by Taylor Swift. Re-written.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,659 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 8/10/2011 - Published: 12/13/2010 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
The Boathouse Ghost by funnyfanwolf reviews
I watched the lastest Harry Potter film and got inspired when I once again heard Snape's story. I like this story but I know I made Snape be in the wrong place, I feel stupid now becuase he died in the Shreiking Shack. I'm sorry about that
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,332 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/9/2011 - Albus S. P., Severus S.
A Perfectly Imperfect Pair by One and a Half Slytherins reviews
The Golden Trio return for their seventh year at Hogwarts. Former Death Eater Draco Malfoy does too. Will jealousy and family hinder his love for the brains of the Golden Trio or will he take charge of his life and go after the girl he loves?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 25 - Words: 88,991 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 7/27/2011 - Published: 3/26/2011 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
How Did We End Up Here? by HeirofGryffindor16 reviews
What would happen if Hermione and Fred were together? What if Fred never died? This is how Fred and Hermione's relationship has formed and changed over the years. *I changed the rating for future language usage*
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 44,702 - Reviews: 259 - Favs: 248 - Follows: 174 - Updated: 7/23/2011 - Published: 11/4/2010 - Fred W., Hermione G. - Complete
What They Really Mean by Wizards-Pupil reviews
This is a quick field guide to understanding the vocabulary of women. Women never put what they're thinking in plain words, but they hide it behind words that usually mean the opposite of what they're thinking. Merlin knows I could have used this guide.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,782 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 7/18/2011 - Published: 7/7/2011 - Fred W., Hermione G.
Marriage Mischief by Wizards-Pupil reviews
I had six weeks to marry Hermione Granger, my little brothers best friend and one time girl friend. The bookwork I had known since my third year, the prefect that had sent me to detention, yelled at me, and called our inventions rubbish. Merlin's Beard.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 35 - Words: 88,151 - Reviews: 819 - Favs: 660 - Follows: 262 - Updated: 7/11/2011 - Published: 6/7/2011 - George W., Hermione G. - Complete
Of Pranks and Reading Book 2 by Rosa Clearwater reviews
Enemies, Professors, Lemondrops oh my! The Second Part Of Pranks and Reading! The original characters are back again, but without magic making sure they don't harm one another, can they make it through this reading alive?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,151 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 7/6/2011 - Published: 1/20/2011 - James P.
Trapped! by Yue Sai reviews
Albus, along with the other staff members, thought it would be funny to trap Minerva and Severus in a room. What will happen as they sit to watch the show? Just a one-shot with some fluff, hope you enjoy! Sequel is up now!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,023 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/24/2011 - Minerva M., Severus S. - Complete
Truth or Dare at the Burrow by Wizards-Pupil reviews
A simple game of truth or dare becomes a wild ride when you put this group together. "Do you ever have sex dreams about Snape?" "Yes..." Challange fic! Rated T for suggestive themes and Language.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,734 - Reviews: 140 - Favs: 358 - Follows: 54 - Published: 6/13/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Yule by Wizards-Pupil reviews
"Hermione, would you do me a huge favor?" I asked, talking before I even thought it through, you'll see I do that quite a lot. I took a breath and put every bit of my Gryffindor courage into my next statement. "Would you go to the Yule ball with me?"
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 46 - Words: 130,093 - Reviews: 1021 - Favs: 1,039 - Follows: 391 - Updated: 6/2/2011 - Published: 4/18/2011 - Hermione G., George W. - Complete
PJO Message in a Bottle by xXPercidiaJacksonXx reviews
The PJO characters leave FF writers messages in a bottle. Read what they have to say.
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 965 - Reviews: 109 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 5/10/2011 - Published: 4/23/2011
Weasleys reading epilogue by daniboy95 reviews
The Weasleys get an unsespected guest and a letter from a stranger, they have never meet. How will they react as they discover something? This fanfic is writing the year before Ron goes to Hogwarts.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,980 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 131 - Follows: 33 - Published: 5/8/2011 - Harry P. - Complete
World of Ash by LovelyLittleLolita reviews
In the world of ash, no one can hear your screams
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Horror/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 887 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/2/2011
Wedding Gifts by RedHal reviews
It's Harry's and Ginny's wedding. To appease Harry's 4 year old godson, they go on and open their wedding gifts. However, there's one special gift that neither were expecting. Especially since one name on the card knows nothing of it.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,271 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 137 - Follows: 31 - Published: 4/26/2011 - Ginny W. - Complete
The Mist of Time by Wizards-Pupil reviews
Twain said 'There aint no surer way to find out if you like or hate people than to travel with them' I had no idea how right he was and I didn't want to test it by getting stuck in 410. I really didnt want to get stuck with Fred George and Harry either.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 41 - Words: 98,995 - Reviews: 448 - Favs: 455 - Follows: 177 - Updated: 4/16/2011 - Published: 3/5/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Gabbing Gum by Wizards-Pupil reviews
Fred and George have a new product to test, and who better to test it on than their uptight sales witch? They don't know that she has a few secrets she doesn't want to spill. Can she keep them or will the gum prove to be to much for her? TE april winner.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,397 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 230 - Follows: 25 - Published: 4/10/2011 - Fred W., Hermione G. - Complete
Dear Prankster PS Prefect by Wizards-Pupil reviews
"I'm actually writing to ask for your help. I know, I can hardly believe it either. I'm having a problem with Ron and need some advice on what I can do to him." "I will totally help you, actually, I think it'll be a lot of fun!"
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 34 - Words: 55,262 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 164 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 3/26/2011 - Published: 2/13/2011 - Hermione G., George W. - Complete
My Dad's a Werewolf by RedHal reviews
Post DH. Harry tells Teddy of Remus' condition.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 20,016 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 127 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 3/4/2011 - Published: 2/25/2011 - Harry P., Teddy L. - Complete
A Hiking We Will Go by Wizards-Pupil reviews
Hermione wants to take Fred to her favorite treehouse, sounds simple, right? Well, when you add in two leaf clovers, a forest, and nightime, you get one crazy trip. "Fred?" "Yeah?" "We're lost." Winner of the Twin Exchange March challenge!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 988 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 9 - Published: 3/2/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Sure Possibility of a Future by AlliedHeart reviews
During the Deathly Hallows, Ginny notices her family appears to be losing hope. She wishes for something that will give them something to fight for. Suddenly they are all reading a short story of nineteen years later. Family reads just the epilogue story.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,068 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 256 - Follows: 53 - Published: 2/26/2011 - Ginny W. - Complete
Through a Nightmare Darkly by Wizards-Pupil reviews
Even Trelawny with her doom and gloom self never would have predicted this. Who could have? The war was over, we weren't supposed to be fighting anymore, and we weren't supposed to be in danger. But we were, and it was threatening to kill us both.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 28,062 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 2/23/2011 - Published: 2/11/2011 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
How Not to Get a Bookworm by Wizards-Pupil reviews
"Fred, you have a problem." George said in a bracing tone. I shook my head adamantly, I did not have a problem, I was just in love with the oblivious Hermione Granger. She was the girl I was going to marry. All I had to do was get her to say Hello.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,580 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 223 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 2/5/2011 - Published: 1/30/2011 - Fred W., Hermione G. - Complete
What not to do at Hogwarts by Rosa Clearwater reviews
For the 200 things I'm not allowed to do at Hogwarts
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,245 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 1/24/2011 - Published: 12/31/2010 - Fred W., Minerva M.
Goddess of the Night by surfgirl1 reviews
The wolves didn't stop Laurent in time, so Bella was changed. Now she is the Volturi's greatest enemy, and a completely different person.Izzy has to deal with a lot of things already, so what happens when the Cullens find out what happened to their human?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 11,132 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 1/18/2011 - Published: 5/25/2009 - Bella - Complete
Legends by Wizards-Pupil reviews
Ten years after the end of the Second Wizarding War and Umbridge has escaped from Azkaban with the intent of getting revenge on everyone who defied her while she taught at Hogwarts. Add a bunch of mischievous kids and you get a crazy house. Sequel to F-B
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 42,055 - Reviews: 149 - Favs: 240 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 1/8/2011 - Published: 11/4/2010 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
The Fallen goddess by happysmiles159 reviews
When Edward leaves in New Moon Bella's brother shows up saying that her time as a mortal is up and she has to come back to Camp Half-Blood. Who does she find in New York? What's happening to the mist? Better than it sounds! I don't own anything!
Crossover - Twilight & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 33 - Words: 81,596 - Reviews: 427 - Favs: 475 - Follows: 233 - Updated: 12/29/2010 - Published: 3/9/2010 - Bella - Complete
Third Generation Goes Back by Dimcairien reviews
Teddy and Victorie are out and their kids get into mischief. Lily Luna is babysitting and chaos ensues. A mysterious golden object and people who are dead, are alive. What could this possibly mean? Teddy's kids go back to OOTP and meet their relatives.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 28,732 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 12/21/2010 - Published: 8/17/2010 - Complete
Staff Room Gossip by RedHal reviews
Every wonder what goes on in the staff room? Well, this one-shot covers one day in each year, plus an extra year that's not part of the books.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,089 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 134 - Follows: 23 - Published: 11/21/2010 - Complete
Forbidden Bond by Wizards-Pupil reviews
Hermione see's Fred fall during the Battle of Hogwarts but manages to save him using a forbidden Spell. The affects of the spell are unexpected, and complicated. Add ministry enforced weddings and you get one crazy year. My spin on the Marriage Law fics.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 43 - Words: 76,040 - Reviews: 690 - Favs: 1,014 - Follows: 235 - Updated: 10/30/2010 - Published: 10/13/2010 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
Fan Mail by RedHal reviews
Post OOTP. After a failed suicide attempt, Harry goes to the Weasleys' early. To help keep his mind off of Sirius' death, he is given something he has been denied. And hopefully get a few laughs too.Changed the rating.Can get by as K
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,359 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 25 - Published: 10/20/2010 - Harry P. - Complete
The Maraudering Tales by Fixation33 reviews
This series will contain one-shots applying to the Marauders with some Lily and possible OCs. Prompted from my Reading the Books series, these one-shots will make you laugh. Canon, and Marauder's era. No slash. Rated M just in case.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 8 - Words: 19,730 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 10/17/2010 - Published: 9/8/2010 - Marauders - Complete
Drinking Doesn't Solve Anything by frostykitten reviews
Hermione learns the hard way that alcohol is a horrible coping mechanism when she wakes up in none other than Draco Malfoy's house after a night of drinking. Now she's stuck on his private island and has to figure out a way home - and how she got there.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 23,147 - Reviews: 199 - Favs: 270 - Follows: 106 - Updated: 10/3/2010 - Published: 8/9/2010 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
It Started With Revenge by frostykitten reviews
Sequel to A Tail Changes Everything. Hermione and Draco are back from the Burrow and find themselves unable to ignore each other the way they used to - quite the opposite in fact. They can't seem to get away from each other, whether they like it or not.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 39,725 - Reviews: 184 - Favs: 274 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 9/30/2010 - Published: 8/21/2010 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
A Tail Changes Everything by frostykitten reviews
Hermione was woken by a girlish scream and then loud, stomping footsteps. The first thing she noticed was that her bed was way too small, the second thing she noticed was a very angry Malfoy in a towel standing above her... Rated T to be safe.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 28,404 - Reviews: 177 - Favs: 381 - Follows: 92 - Updated: 8/19/2010 - Published: 7/20/2010 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
How to Annoy Voldemort by RedHal reviews
Ron and Hermione are kidnapped and they decide to show Voldemort that Harry isn't the only thorn in his side. Major RXHer with a little HXG at the end.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,856 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 128 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 7/14/2010 - Published: 7/12/2010 - Ron W., Hermione G. - Complete
Caught in the Crowd by ScarletRain94 reviews
They were friends in high school, but she turned her back on him. now 5 years later He's a successful Self-defense teacher, and her an aspiring singer. Will he ever forgive her for what she has done? Will something blossom between them?Read&Review
Inuyasha - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,003 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 7/13/2010 - Published: 3/5/2010 - Inuyasha, Kagome H.
A Second Chance by RedHal reviews
Harry and Ginny time travel to the past and Harry gets a second chance to meet his parents...as his mother is pregnant with him.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,571 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 298 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 6/30/2010 - Published: 6/26/2010 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Great Hall Quidditch by Dimcairien reviews
What happens when James Potter gets an idea that involves the Marauders, Quidditch, and the Great Hall? This idea came to me rather randomly. One-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 889 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/20/2010 - James P., Minerva M. - Complete
The Overdue Sacking of Dolores Umbridge by fantasyessa reviews
Kingsley Shacklebolt is minister, and it is his duty to detect the wizards involved in Voldemort's former plans. Once he's rounded up all the Death Eater's he needs to start on the still employed ministry workers... and he starts with Dolores Umbridge.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,792 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 9 - Published: 5/22/2010 - Dolores U., Kingsley S. - Complete
Living Again, My way, The Black Way! by EternalLoveAndDarknessAlike-K reviews
Edward abandoned me along with the rest of his coven, leaving me in a foreign world. Little did they know they did so in vain. Bella Swan is no more, instead Annamaria Isabella Weasley-Black shall emerge from the shadows and return home, Hogwarts & the UK
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 7 - Words: 13,107 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 158 - Follows: 157 - Updated: 3/19/2010 - Published: 9/20/2009 - Bella
Hermione? by redrose88 reviews
you think you know who you are. think again. hermione deals with being pure blood after all
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 23,619 - Reviews: 129 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 3/5/2010 - Published: 12/29/2008 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Hermione's Shocking Third Year by Harpygirl24 reviews
During Hermione’s third year she finds out that she’s Harry’s sister, Remus’s goddaughter, and Snape’s daughter. Add an escaped prisoner and Dementors and it will be an interesting year.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 26 - Words: 30,974 - Reviews: 323 - Favs: 354 - Follows: 178 - Updated: 2/13/2010 - Published: 12/16/2009 - Hermione G., Severus S. - Complete
The Sorting Hat's Love by hahaharrypulp reviews
This is disturbing, poorly written and discusting! Enjoy!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,498 - Reviews: 565 - Favs: 369 - Follows: 32 - Published: 1/28/2010 - Hermione G., Sorting Hat - Complete
Mothers Inteference by merinxD reviews
UNEDITED, BUT GETTING THERE - Draco is set to marry his best friends sister by order of his mother, the catch is...they don't know who the bride is. DMHG
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 26,798 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 267 - Follows: 206 - Updated: 1/17/2010 - Published: 5/5/2005 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Hermione's Boggart by embirsiphonelilathia reviews
Boggarts. Today it was boggarts and everyone thought they'd know exactly what Hermione would see they were wrong though, so very, very wrong.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 23 - Words: 52,453 - Reviews: 580 - Favs: 665 - Follows: 273 - Updated: 1/5/2010 - Published: 7/2/2009 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
A Phone Battle Harry VS Edward by Your Grace Still Amazes Me reviews
Edward calls Harry and they battle it out once and for all... who is the best? Vampires or Wizards? R&R!
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 347 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 7 - Published: 1/3/2010 - Harry P., Edward - Complete
Life's Secrets by Not All Heroes Wear Capes reviews
Dumbledore sent Bella to Forks, wandless and alone for her own protection after Wormtail escapes POA . It's been nearly a year since she stepped foot in the wizarding world, but she goes to the world cup with Ron. That's when everything goes downhill.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 124,129 - Reviews: 326 - Favs: 299 - Follows: 288 - Updated: 12/15/2009 - Published: 8/23/2009 - Bella
A Harmless Prank by Wooden Tulips reviews
Draco and Hermione are Head Boy and Girl and a slight prank war ensues.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,689 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 112 - Follows: 13 - Published: 10/28/2009 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
thrown together by Severus' Malfoy Maiden reviews
marriage law...First time, Can they make it work?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 27,869 - Reviews: 138 - Favs: 389 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 8/30/2009 - Published: 8/18/2009 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Draco and Hermione on the train by whowrotewhat reviews
Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger get initmate. Graphic Lemon. One-Shot. Read and Review. UPDATE, this story was copied without permission and then posted under the title 'Train Ride' by the user 'RoseDominique'. She is claiming it as her own. Please help me let fan fiction know that plagiarism affects us all and it's not okay .
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,435 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 171 - Follows: 31 - Published: 8/14/2009 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Heiress of the Dark Lord by CJ Wellington reviews
Now known to the world as the Dark Lord’s Daughter, Hermione is forced to choose between the two things she loves most: Her father or her friends. And when her friends turn their back on her, Hermione’s tears a dried by the boy who has disgraced her for..
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 47,206 - Reviews: 268 - Favs: 450 - Follows: 236 - Updated: 7/20/2009 - Published: 12/29/2006 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
50 Things To Remember When My Wife Is Pregnant by dogstar-ebony reviews
-"18. When Hermione is having a Hormone, do not anger her. Do not speak to her, do not breathe in her direction." Ron Weasley has written a list of Do's and Do NOTs to remind himself how to behave whilst Hermione is pregnant with Hugo. Silly oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,205 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 238 - Follows: 13 - Published: 10/28/2008 - Ron W. - Complete
The Heir of Hogwarts by RedHal reviews
The Sequel to Consequences that everyone has been asking for. This goes from the wedding of Harry and Ginny, to a few years after Taran and Tara graduate. Details inside.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 42 - Words: 63,837 - Reviews: 149 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 4/19/2008 - Published: 10/31/2007 - Complete
Fate's Gifts by RedHal reviews
What if Umbridge had gone through with the Cruciatus curse in her office after he finished contacting Kreacher? And what if he was under it for a good amount of time? Will Harry remain like the Longbottoms or will Fate finally interfere on behalf of Harry
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,067 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 168 - Follows: 32 - Published: 4/2/2008 - Complete
Switches and Time Travel by RedHal reviews
Due to a fairy prank, Lily and James wake up to find themselves in each others bodies. The cure: get along for one week. Things get even wierder when a mysterious door apears and a group of people appear. And what's this about powers of the heirs?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 8,855 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 1/13/2008 - Published: 1/7/2008 - Complete
2nd Generation Marauders by RedHal reviews
While running an errand for his aunt, Harry meets up with two wizarding kids his age looking for their fathers. However, there is something familiar about them. And who are their fathers whom they've never met?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 14 - Words: 18,640 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 148 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 1/5/2008 - Published: 12/19/2007 - Complete
Circle of Time by RedHal reviews
Just your average Golden Group go to the past. While visiting the Marauders, our three heroes meet up with a VERY familiar face. Better than it sounds. Post OOTP
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 11 - Words: 8,087 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 1/4/2008 - Published: 12/19/2007 - Complete
Anything But Lemon and Cheese Soup by ThreeDollarBill reviews
Fleur has to deal with the weird behaviors of a pregnant Hermione. Included are rapid changes of mood, weird cravings, and a sudden case of raging sexual hormones. FleurHermione oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,256 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 13 - Published: 11/29/2007 - [Hermione G., Fleur D.] - Complete
The Unforgettable Summer by RedHal reviews
Hedwig has been acting strange since the rise of Voldemort. Apparently, 15 years ago, he had tried a new spell and she and her husband had been the victims. Her plan had been to wait for Harry to turn 17, but with Voldemort back, Harry needs to be told
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 18 - Words: 20,277 - Reviews: 137 - Favs: 276 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 11/6/2007 - Published: 10/26/2007 - Complete
The Aftermath by RedHal reviews
Segment of Potion Mistake. From new found powers, to baby sisters, to fanmail. This is what Harry was up to after defeating Voldemort
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 23 - Words: 35,362 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 9/18/2007 - Published: 8/31/2007 - Complete
The Last Battle by RedHal reviews
Spoiler from seventh book. This is my version of what happened in the final battle in book seven told from Ginny's POV. Do NOT, I repeat, do NOT open this link if you haven't gotten to that part of the seventh book.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,240 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/20/2007 - Ginny W. - Complete
Black Phoenix by RedHal reviews
After the death of his godfather, Harry has a strange dream and goes for a walk. As he's walking, he comes across an animal he knows.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 27 - Words: 35,435 - Reviews: 172 - Favs: 481 - Follows: 157 - Updated: 7/21/2007 - Published: 7/10/2007 - Complete
Evil's Mistress by SeanEmma4Evr reviews
Everyone knows and loves Hermione Granger. What is not to love? However, after Hermione was taken by the Dark Lord, then corrupted and seduced by Draco Malfoy, a secret was born. What side is Hermione really on? HGDM. CBMTD.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 54,940 - Reviews: 422 - Favs: 435 - Follows: 155 - Updated: 7/10/2007 - Published: 2/8/2007 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
150 Things I am not allowed to do in Hogwarts by CaramelBoost reviews
Molly Weasley, after getting tired of the tirade of complaints against her twins, has given Fred and George a list.. A list of things they are not allowed to do in Hogwarts upon penalty of death. Their reaction? Complete disbelief. Oneshot. No pairings.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,779 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 593 - Follows: 37 - Published: 4/30/2007 - George W. - Complete
Parental Reaction by RedHal reviews
This was going to be a chapter in Memories, but it was too long. This shows Harry telling Lily, James, Remus, and Sirius his story of the past 4 years at Hogwarts. Goes with Sirius' Potion Mistake.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 26,621 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 147 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 3/30/2007 - Published: 3/14/2007 - Complete
Consequences of a Potion Mistake by RedHal reviews
The real sequal to Sirius' Potion Mistake. This is the story of Megan's life in Hogwarts and how she deals with a famous brother, family, and friends.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 30 - Words: 63,237 - Reviews: 262 - Favs: 142 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 10/14/2006 - Published: 9/14/2006 - Complete
Sinful by locket-too reviews
Hermione has a dark meeting with someone. DracoHermione Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 983 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 5 - Published: 10/14/2006 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Head Business by sellthelie reviews
Head Boy requests the presence of Head Girl on grounds of pressing matters...Draco&Hermione
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 364 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 6 - Published: 8/16/2006 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Draco Malfoy and the Dancing Tampons by BestSkeptic reviews
Draco stumbles into Hermione's tampon stash and is completely oblivious as to what they are. A short, lighthearted piece that goes to show that even married couples, despite vows to do otherwise, keep secrets from each other. Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 767 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 189 - Follows: 16 - Published: 7/18/2006 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Sirius' Potion Mistake by RedHal reviews
Trying to bring the ghosts of James and Lily so they could protect Harry from Snape's taunting, Sirius makes a mistake and actually brings them back to life.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 40 - Words: 34,126 - Reviews: 990 - Favs: 675 - Follows: 260 - Updated: 7/9/2006 - Published: 5/19/2006 - Complete
To Be a House Elf by OtherwiseKnownAsOli reviews
Hermione Granger is officially fed up with people shunning her idea of SPEW. She decides to collaborate with a well known redheaded set of twins to come up with a prank that no Hogwarts student will ever forget. Who knows what'll happen. HG.GW
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 38,173 - Reviews: 345 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 5/30/2006 - Published: 12/13/2005 - Hermione G., George W. - Complete
Teaching in the Future by RedHal reviews
A couple of years after the class of 1980 graduated Hogwarts, James, Lily, and Sirius are asked to teach DADA.There is a catch though. They are to teach in 1998. So, Dumbledore sends them into the future to teach Harry.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 17 - Words: 12,927 - Reviews: 211 - Favs: 415 - Follows: 122 - Updated: 4/30/2006 - Published: 4/19/2006 - Complete
Day of the Spoons by BajaB reviews
Will Harry have the courage to ask Hermione what is going on before Ron hurts himself trying to hold in the laughter? Short oneshot comedy set in the middle of OotP
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,444 - Reviews: 153 - Favs: 441 - Follows: 46 - Published: 1/5/2006 - Hermione G., George W. - Complete
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Twins will be twins reviews
what if lissa and bella were twins and rose and daisy are twins? who is daisy you may ask read it, love it, hate it, rate it, review it Rated: T for safty
Crossover - Twilight & Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,566 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 10/29/2011 - Published: 1/6/2010
He lied, He left, Now im back reviews
Edward lied then left bella now she is going back to hogwarts
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 9 - Words: 14,761 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 10/21/2011 - Published: 12/17/2009
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