Poll: which of these headlines/labels is funnier? Vote Now!
Author has written 5 stories for Vampire Academy, Phantom of the Opera, Phineas and Ferb, and Harry Potter.
oh, my god, I haven't updated this in over a year!
favorite sayings:"love is when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."~ Dr. Seuss
other cool ones:"some people are like slinkies, Useless, but it brings a smile to your face when you push down a flight of stairs." , " When life gives you lemons, make orange juice. If life gives you more lemons, chuck them back and ask for ice cream instead." , "Win or loose, just claim victory"
favorite quote: " 'You've got a date with destiny. Don't be late.' I brushed some hair out of my eyes. ' Is that a movie quote? Or is it an actual date? I don't remember destiny asking me. I never even gave destiny my phone number.' " I's from Maximum ride 2, School's out- Forever
Favorite series: Hunger Games, Vampire Acadamy
Favorite book: Deathly hallows(chapter 33) or hunger games
Favorite Composer: ANDREW LLOYD WEBBER! he is freaking Awesome.
Favorite play: Phantom of the Opera (I CAN"T DECIDE????)
Person you most resemble(LOOKS) from the play: Phantom of the opera=Meg
Person you most resemble(PERSONALITY) from the play: Phantom of the opera=Madame Giry? Not really any...
Favorite Singer: Taylor swift
Favorite Song: The point of no return by Andrew Lloyd Webber
Favorite line of favorite song: That bridge is crossed so stand and watch it burn.
Favorite Ice cream: Coffee
Favorite disney movie: Hercules
Favorite greek god(ess): Hades
Favorite Phobia: Arachibutyrophobia - Fear of peanut sticking to the roof of the mouth.
Favorite colors: pale pink, purple, black, tardis blue
Favorite bone: humerous
Favorite thing to do: read a book, surf the web, youtube, or fanfiction
Favorite Mythological creature: dragon, gryphon, or pegasus
Greatest fear: Even though I'm Arachnaphobic, I'd have to say that my greatest fear isn't spiders. It isn't even death of the unknown. My greatest fear is a world with no laughter.
FRIENDS: Never ask anything to eat or drink
BESTFRIENDS: Help themselves and is the reason you never have any food
FREINDS: Call your parents Mr. or Mrs.
BESTFRIENDS: Call your parents MOM and DAD
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail
BESTFRIENDS: Would be sitting in the cell next to you saying, "Let's do it again!"
FRIENDS: Will pick out a cute chick-flick to watch with you on movie night
BESTFRIENDS: Will pick out "The Ring" for movie night then scare you and himself/herself in the process
FRIENDS: Never seen you cry
BESTFRIENDS: Wont tell anyone else you cry... just laugh about it when your not down anymore
FRIENDS: Meet your boy/girl friend and say nice to meet you
BESTFRIENDS: Meet your boy/girl friend and scare the BLEEP out of him/her by threatening to break every bone in him/her's body if he/she hurts your bestfriend
FRIENDS: Will say you can do better
BESTFRIENDS: Will call him and say"you have seven days to live"
FRIENDS: Ask why you're crying
BESTFRIENDS: Already have a shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry
FRIENDS: Will help you move
BESTFRIENDS: Will help you move the body
FRIENDS: helps you up when you fall
BESTFRIENDS: continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"
FRIENDS: gives you their umbrella in the rain
BESTFRIENDS: takes yours and says, "RUN, -BEEP- RUN!"
FRIENDS: wipes your tears when your rejected
BESTFRIENDS: goes up to him and says, "It's because your gay isn't it?"
FRIENDS: Ask you to write down your number
BESTFRIENDS: Has you on speed dial
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff and gives it back a few days later
BESTFRIENDS:Loses your stuff and tells you, "my bad .. heres a tissue"
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you
BESTFRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography about your life
FREINDS:Will leave you behind if thats what everyone else is doing
BESTFRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd's butt that left you
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door
BESTFRIENDS:Would walk right in and say,"I'M HOME"
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell
BESTFRIENDS: Already know not to tell
FRIENDS: Are through high school /college (drinking buddies)
BESTFRIENDS: Are for life
FRIENDS:Will be there to take your drink away when they think youve had enough
BESTFRIENDS:Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say,"Girl drink the rest of that you know we dont waste
FRIENDS: comfort you when you fight with your boyfriend
BEST FRIENDS: go over to his house and kick his but and maybe even scar him for life (hehe)
FRIENDS: tell you to forget it when you say you want to vandalize a guy's house
BEST FRIENDS: best friends are the ones getting fined by the police with you
FRIENDS: Think your insane for jumping off a roof onto a trampoline
BEST FRIENDS: Are jumping right after you
FRIENDS: come over every couple of months for a sleepover
BEST FRIENDS: are your weekend boarders
FRIENDS: are offended when you make fun of them
BEST FRIENDS: kick your butt and all's forgiven
FRIENDS: are shy around your boyfriend
BEST FRIENDS: will tease him till he blushes redder than a fire engine
FRIENDS: don't see you if you're sick
BEST FRIENDS: are why you're sitting in bed under a blanket with a thermometer, book, and your phone
FRIENDS:dare you to scream into the street
BEST FRIENDS: dare you to go streaking
FRIENDS: call you retarded for running threw bleachers yelling "IT'S PICKLE TIME!"
BEST FRIENDS: are screaming and running with you
Friends: Require you to share "Bestfriend" necklaces because "It proves were really close"
BESTFRIENDS: Agree they are pointless, but get them anyway 'cause some look cute.
FREINDS: Will ignore this
BESTFRIENDS:Will repost this crap
To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write For Marijuana
6. Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.
7. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.
8. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
9. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
10. Sing Along At The Opera.
11. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
12. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
13. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'
14. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
15. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'
16. And The Final Way
If you act random most of the time, copy and paste this into your profile
If you are wondering what it would be like to have wings, copy and paste this into your profile
If you are sugar high most of the time, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan-fictions, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then copy and paste this into your profile
If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile
If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile
I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, which I am, but I'm also random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
If you have ever yelled at the book you were reading because the characters did something stupid post this on your profile
If you ever fallen over laughing for no reason cut and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted copy and paste this on your profile.
If you talk back to the TV cut and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of it's effects, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a ridiculously long profile, copy and paste this onto your profile to make it longer.
If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingys, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever want to be a cat copy and paste this into your profile
92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breath. Copy this into your profile if you'd be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off.
If you think energy drinks are bad for you because they make you spazz out, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you guys love to read, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you like the outdoors, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you ever tripped where there was a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever tripped, got up, and then fell right back down, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you are guilty of doing a British, Irish, Australian, Southern accent or Elvis impression, copy this in your profile.
Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you are a nerd and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you adore pandas, copy this into you profile.
If you're friends give you odd looks for being yourself, copy this into your profile.
If you love copy thingies, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever ran into a glass door, copy this into your profile.
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
If you know there's more to good random humor than saying "cheese", "cookie", or "pie", copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever been asked your age and you said the age that you were a year ago, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you know at least 8 different types of cats, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever forgot your name, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.
If you or your best friend is insane copy this into your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
You ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the poor leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this into your profile.
If you realized that Percy Jackson forgot his name twice within one year, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you noticed that Percy always singes his arm hair off, and wonder how he has time to grow it back, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you wonder why Athena gave Annabeth a Yankees cap when she lives in Virginia, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile
If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile:)
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that girls are equals to boys, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you hate that boys will punch eachother, beat eachother up, and tackle one another, but are too sexist to lay a finger on girls no matter how much you annoy them, copy and past this into yout profile.
If you use that fact to your advantage no matter how much you hate it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile
If you think the Cocoa Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.
Some people are like slinkies...they're really good for nothing...but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs! If you agree with this, copy and paste this into your profile
If you've ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile
If you've ever randomly fallen out of your chair, copy this into your profile
If you've ever fallen going up the stairs, copy this into your profile
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which makes weird good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy & paste this onto your profile
If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever thought of something funny, started laughing, and fell & hit your head on something hard, and ended up laughing harder than you were before, copy and paste this into your profile
Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"
If you have ever copied and pasted so many things you don't know if you are repeating anything and copy and paste it anyway, copy and paste this into your profile
If you think that 'morning people' should be driven off the face of the planet so they can spread their 6-AM cheer to say, Martians, copy this into your profile.
If oyu can raed tihs, cpoy tihs itno yuor polrfie, and sea if ohtres can raed it. (P.S. If dyslexia is like this, I think I could handle it)
If FanFiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile
If you have ever read a 250 pg + book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever said something and two seconds later, completely forgot, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've ever walked into a wall before copy this into your profile
If you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile
If you think Poseidon is cool, copy and past this to your profile
If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" things, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you have an exceedingly long profile because of copy/paste items, copy this into your profile to make it even longer.
If you think this following label-Christmas lights: To be used for indoor or outdoor use only (as opposed to...?) is crazy, copy and paste this into your profile
Profile your into this paste and copy, retard a like back to front from this read you if. Now, read it backwards.
If you ever wondered why they sterilize needles before giving lethal injections, Copy and paste this into your profile
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freaking' Trix, copy this into your profile.
If you missed the "if you..." After the trix and the rabbit, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you fell for that, copy the last three "if you's" into your profile. :P
If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile
A word to the wise isn't nessacery. It's the stupid ones that need advice. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile.
98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile and give yourself a pat on the back.
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder. If you burst out laughing at that, Copy and paste this into your profile.
Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap music. If you're part of the 8 percent that shakes their head in wonder at their lack of taste. (no offense rap lovers) copy and past thi9s into your profile
If your still reading this(not sure why you would be...), copy and paste this into your profile
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism.
now for semoehtnig itnresitng...
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
If you could read that put it in your profile
A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America", for an amount of "up to and including my life."
~Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
~Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.
~Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
~Everything here is edible. Even I'm edible, but that is called cannibalism, my dear children, and is frowned upon in most societies.
~I didn't cheat death. I won fair and square.
~If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.
~When in doubt, NUKE IT!
~If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?
~Actual Headline: Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
~A train station is where the train stops an leaves. A bus station is where the bus stops and leaves. On my desk, I have a work station...
~I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
~When people talk to God, it's called prayer. When God talks back, it's called schizophrenia.
~Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver
~You don't have to quote great people to show you are one.
~I will steal a horse fairly, but I won't accept someone letting me take it due to something as stupid and egotistical as my gender
~I want to die in my sleep like my grandpa. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.
~Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
~He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
~Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
~Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
~The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
~The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.
~Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.
~The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
~A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
~When you go into court, you are putting yourself In the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
Cool Movie (or book) Quotes
Me I'm dishonest, and you can always trust a dishonest man to be dishonest, honestly, it's the honest ones you have to watch out for because you never know when they're going to do something incredibly stupid. -Captain Jack Sparrow
With great power, comes the great need to take a nap.-Nico di Angelo
... I love those moments, I like to wave at them as they pass by ...-Jack Sparrow
"I feel like, like pudding. Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain"-Iggy
"I met my downfall in the form of a bench."-Rose Hathaway
"I'm not jealous. I'm just_" / "Feeling insecure that your girlfriend is spending a lot of time with a rich reasonably cute guy whom she might like. Or, as we like to call it, Jealous."- Christian Ozera and Rose Hathaway
"You did not just say that, the next thing you know we'll be hugging and making up nicknames for each other" / "I already have a nickname for you but I'll get in trouble if I say it in class."- Christian Ozera and Rose Hathaway
"It's times like this, that i wish I had listened to my mother when I was young" / "oh, what did she say?" / "I don't know, I didn't listen."- Arthur Dent, Ford Prefect, Arthur.
"you can attack me, you can send assassins after me; that's fine, but nobody messes with my boyfriend"~Buffy
"how many times am i gonna have to kill you? ballpark figure."~Buffy
"power, i have it, they don't, this bothers them"~Buffy
"mom, dead people are talking to you. do the math!"~Buffy
"and you'll be stopping me...how?"~Buffy
"We attack the mayor with Humus"~Buffy
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose-- me or your life.
Boy: My life.
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says-
The reason you never cross my mind is because you are always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I am not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
The Argument between god and man.
God: I refuse to prove i exist, for proof denies faith and without faith I am Nothing.
MAn: Well, the (Babbel fish) is is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have involved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by you own arguments, you don't.
God: Oh, I hadn't thought of that *promptly vanishes in a poof of logic.*
(the babbel fish is from the HItchhiker's guide to the galaxy.)
Just in case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some label instructions on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (But that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special)
On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (And that would be how…?)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's "just" a suggestion)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): Do not turn upside down. (a bit late now . . .)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (REALLY? I was hoping it was going to be frozen... damn.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication. (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: Warning: May cause drowsiness. (Isn't that the purpose?)
On most brands of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (I wonder what they mean by "other uses" . . .)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (NO WAY! REALLY?!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts. (hmm . . . why exactly does it say that?)
On a child's superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (Dammit! I bought if for nothing!)
On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals. (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Her name was Auroura
Her dad was a drunk
Her only friend
She always talked to it
Until her parents
A bruise on her leg
But she grabs her bear
She sits in the corner
Such a bad life
Then one night
Then her mom suddenly
She thrusted the blade
The mom walked out
Police showed up
One officer slowly
It must have been bad
If you hate child abuse then repost this on your profile.
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