Author has written 10 stories for Maximum Ride, Wizards of Waverly Place, Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D's, Twilight, Class of the Titans, Teen Titans, Avatar: Last Airbender, and Unnatural History.
Hey there! So you've stumbled upon my Fanfiction.Net account. I welcome, you, my friends pity you.
Now, let's make one thing clear: there are some things that will never appear on my profile. Here is what they are:
1. My name.
2. My location.
And 3. Stuff that's need-to-know. You don't. Get it?
Sorry if I sounded like a jerk, but by need-to-know, I mean private stuff. The most you'll get out of me is I'm a girl.
For anyone who's received an anonymous review from someone named too hyper for sugar, hi. I recently got an account.
GO CHECK OUT and
1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.
2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans... -_-
Re-post this if you believe in legalizing gay marriage.
The right to read.
The right NOT to read.
The right to not finish books.
The right to skip & skim pages.
The right to reread.
The right to read anything.
The right to read banned books.
The right to mistake a book for real life.
The right to read anywhere.
The right to read aloud.
The right to fall in love with characters in books.
The right to know what everyone else is reading.
The right to have too many books.
The right to carry a book wherever you go.
REASONS TO JOIN THE DARK SIDE (If you wish to join add this list to your profile:
1. We have cookies (last I checked there was hot chocolate too)
2. Meet the recruitment bunny!
3. You get a cool dark cape that covers your whole body!
4. You get a really cool crazy laugh! Practice with me, people: MWA HAHAHAHA cough cough!
5. You get to walk out of shadows mysteriously and freak out the good guys!
6. One word: UNDERLINGS! Someone to get things for you when you're too lazy to do them yourself... Now that's the life!
7. Money, Money, Money : Ever notice that we are usually much richer than the good guys?
8. (Reason I joined) WORLD DOMINATION! THE BEST reason! I have already called dibs on Barnes and Noble and Apple Macintosh so THEY ARE MINE!
103 Ways to Get Kicked Out of Wal-Mart (or Target)
1. Take all the fudge, whipped cream, or anything like that, and make a slip n slide.
2. Walk up to any guy with his girlfriend and slap him crying out "but you said you’d love me forever and ever!!"
3. Walking by someone, start singing a Barney song, when they join in, say "what a bunch of retards" and walk away.
4. Sit in the ice cream isle and (while eating all the ice cream from the carton with your hands) yell at anyone passing by that they cant have any, and to make your point, throw some ice cream at them.
5. Paint a 'mural' with the nail polish, when yelled at, ask them why they hate art.
6. Invite all your friends for a movie night at Wal-Mart. This must include turning off all the lights, opening all the bags of chips and cans of soda, and when watching your movie in the TV section, “shhh” anyone such as the manager and others and them lecture them about being rude.
7. Demand to see the manager at once, muttering about things like 'bad service' and 'rude employees'. Once face to face with the manager, insist that you need his/her autograph straight away.
8. Hide in the clothing racks. When someone starts searching through the clothes, jump up, saying, "Pick me!!"
9. Walk around in the dishware and say to people as they examine cups and such, "Please don't touch that one. It is a very fine piece that I picked up in Volterra, Italy."
10. Ask someone for the time, and before they answer, break out into the chorus for the Phantom of the Opera.
11. Take all the money out of the cash registers and put it in a big pile and roll in it screaming “I’M RICH!!”, when the security comes, tell them that you inherited Wal-Mart, then lecture them about respecting their superiors.
12. On the intercom, broadcast very irrelevant conversations between teenage girls (OH NO U DIDN’T!! he’s totally like going to dump her, he’s too hot for her, did you hear about that??) etc. (broadcast until it stops being funny)
13. Ride the little electronic cars at the front of the store.
14. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10 minute intervals throughout the day.
15. Walk up to an employee and in an official tone of voice say "We've got a code 3 in House wares". See what happens.
16. Turn all the radios to the polka station, then turn them off, but turn the volume as high as it'll go.
17. Play with the automatic doors.
18. Walk up to complete strangers and say "Hi!! I haven't seen you in..." etc. and see how they respond.
19. Leave small gifts in the hands of mannequins.
20. Play soccer with a group of friends using the entire store as your playing field.
21. As the cashier scans an item, say "Wow, magic!".
22. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" to carpeted areas.
23. Put M&M's on layaway.
24. Set up a tent in the camping department. Tell friends they can only come if they bring pillows from Bed & Bath.
25. When an employee comes and asks you if you need help, say "Why won't you all just leave me alone?!".
26. While looking at guns in the gun department, suddenly ask the clerk where the anti-depressants are.
27. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
28. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
29. Two words: "Marco Polo".
30. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.
31. When a someone gives an announcement, assume a fetal position and start screaming, "No, no! not the voices again!". DONE IT!
32. When someone strays from their cart looking at something, take their cart and run away.
33. Follow people throughout the store staying about 5 feet away at all times until they leave the store.
34. Hold shopping cart races.
35. Ask newly hired employees about made up products, i.e. "Do you have any Shnerples here?".
36. Ride the bicycles around claiming that you're taking it for a "test drive".
37. Ask employees, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?".
38. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"
40. Lay on one of the bed displays with a rose and stare at everyone that walks by with a grin on your face.
41. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
42. When 2 or 3 people are walking ahead of you, run between them yelling "Red Rover."
43. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission Impossible
44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's.
45. Pay off layaways 50 cents at a time.
46. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. Go to the food court, buy a drink, and explain that you don't get out much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
47. Make a trail of Mountain Dew on the floor leading to the restrooms.
48. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
49. Go into one of the fitting rooms and yell real loud..."Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"
50. "Accidentally" get stuck in one of the frozen food doors. Give people strange looks and see if anyone helps you out.
51. Add really funny things to other peoples’ carts and watch them pay for it and see if they notice.
52. Ask if you can buy a shopping cart.
53. Bring a friend and get in a shopping cart. Have them push you around while you yell "ye-haw!"
54. Constantly wink at a person you don't know. Follow them around and blow kisses to them.
55. Fill your shopping cart with matchbooks and gasoline and walk around smiling at people.
56. Find a parent with her kid in the shopping cart. Point at the kid and ask the parent, "What aisle are they selling these on?"
57. Gather a bunch of bouncy balls and bounce them into neighboring aisles.
58. Get 20 people together and play hide-n-go-seek. DONE IT
59. Get a friend, put on as many articles of clothing you can find and start sumo wrestling (use diapers if possible) .
60. Go to the express lane and get an item, and say "wait, I forgot something“ Keep doing that until you have like 50, check out, then say "thanks, I forgot how much this costs," and walk away.
61. Go to the video game section and play one of the games for a minute the throw down the controller and start to bang on the display case when an attendant asks you what you are doing tell him your trying to change the game.
62. Go up to a guy and start crying saying I finally found you mommy! And see what he does!
63. Go up to someone and start taking items from their basket and put them into yours.
64. Go up to the clerk and say code Red! and see what they do!
65. Hide in the toy section, when someone comes close jump out at them throw a ball and yell "Pikachu I choose you!"
66. Joust with the electronic assist carts and wrapping paper.
67. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
68. Make the entire auto department smell by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
69. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
70. Page yourself and then after the employee says your name, say...“Oh that's me, I've got to go. Thank you.”
71. Play blind chicken with 12 friends putting a blind fold on one and them having that person trying to find you .
72. Pour bubble bath into the fountains in the garden section.
73. Repeat whatever the store clerk tells you.
74. Roll cans of soup down the aisles.
75. Run around the store yelling I'm a princess while holding a toy wand.
76. Run around yelling for your pet ferret "Stinky". check out all the funny looks you get!
77. Run up to a complete stranger, tag them, and say "You're it!"
78. Sample all the fragrances in the perfume department.
79. Set up a battle of laser tag .
80. Set up ten pineapples in the shape of bowling pins and start bowling with a coconut.
81. Start Humming the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Theme song. Whenever someone looks at an item near you scream "TURTLE POWER" and run away as fast as you can.
82. Strategically scatter those novelty dog poops throughout the store and wait for some to announce "cleanup on aisle ..." then yell "BAD FLUFFY!"
83. Take a snickers bar, go in the bathroom and smoosh the snickers bar in your hand and reach over to the next stall and say "uh do you have some toilet paper over there?"
84. Take all of the free AOL cd's on the end of the check out counter.
85. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
86. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.
87. Time yourself for two minutes and throw as many shoes as possible onto the floor.
88. TP as much of the store as possible.
89. Try to fly on a broom. If anyone asks what you are doing tell them in a very annoyed voice, "the brooms don't work!"
90. Unload then entire bin of giant bouncy balls, get in the bin, have a friend put all the balls back on top of you. When someone walks by jump outta the balls causing them to fly everywhere.
91. Walk about 10 centimeters in front of a moving shopping cart and yell "Its gonna get me!"
92. Walk through the store pushing a cart that is upside-down.
93. Walk up to the automatic doors and walk back and forth through them and each time u go though look up at the sensor and yell "how does it work or ITS MAGIC!"
94. When a woman with children walks near you in the toy aisle, throw yourself on the floor,screaming "MOMMY, I WANT THAT TOY!"
95. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.
96. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putting one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.
97. Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually.
98. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "the fat man walks alone," and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them.
99. Go up to a random person and begin crying "How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won. You kissed ME darling." Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.
100. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
101. Wander around in a hospital gown and repeatedly say, "Why isn't mommie back yet?"
102. Go into the fitting room and yell loudly"I see london i see france!"
'Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!'
'I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends'
'Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.'
'People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door.'
'An apple away keeps the doctor away, if well aimed...'
'One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject'
'Ever stop to think...and forget to start again?'
'There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM...'
'Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.'
'When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back'
'A good friend will comfort you when he breaks up with you. A BEST friend will call him, whispering "Seven days..."'
'You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thnaks for embracing it.'
'They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.'
'Good friends ask why you're crying, BEST FRIENDS already have the shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry'
'A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking'
'I can resist everything except temptation.'
'Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.'
'Love doesn't make the world go round, Love is what makes the ride worthwhile'
'The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.'
'Come over to the good side, we have the Flock and chocolate'
'Life made sense... until I talked to my friends.'
Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'?
I ran with scissors, and lived!
" What a crazy random happenstance"
60 FUN THINGS TO DO IN AN ELEVATOR
1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
4. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
5. Sell Girl Scout cookies.
6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
14. One word: Flatulence!
15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
16. Do Tai Chi exercises.
17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"
19. Give religious tracts to each passenger.
20. Meow occasionally.
21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
22. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"
23. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
24. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.
25. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
28. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"
29. Leave a box between the doors.
30. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
31. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
32. Start a sing-along.
33. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"
34. Play the harmonica.
35. Shadow box.
36. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
37. Lean against the button panel.
38. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
39. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
40. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
41. Bring a chair along.
42. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
43. Blow spit bubbles.
44. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
45. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
46. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
47. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
48. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at the passengers.
49. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."
50. If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
51. Bring a water pistol. Soak everyone's shoes.
52. Start brushing off invisible bugs from your arms, screaming "Aaughh! Get them off!"
53. Challenge your neighbor to a "Tic-Tac-Toe" tournament.
54. Laugh hysterically for five seconds, stop, and glare at the other passengers like they are crazy.
55. Charge into the elevator dripping wet, holding a towel and wearing only a bath robe. Mutter something about how husbands/wives always come home early just when it's getting to the good part.
56. Make chalk drawings on the walls.
57. As the elevator is going up, jump violently up and down, shouting "Down! I said down, dammit!"
58. Crouch in one corner and growl menacingly at everyone who gets on.
59. Try to get a game of "Twister" going.
60. Wrinkle your nose and smell the air repeatedly. Sniff at your neighbor suspiciously, give a disgusted frown, and take a step away.
Habits I'm not a huge fan of:
a) A/Ns in the middle of a story
b) Yelling at people to review (e.g. REVIEW! I won't update if you don't!) Reviews are something an author deserves, and yelling for them means you don't deserve them. Requesting once politely, however, is all right.
c) Let's make one thing clear before I get one of these: I have neither time nor the inclination to deal with flames. As I rarely misspell something and according to internet tests my OCs are no where near Mary-Sue-ish, if I get flamed, it will probably be for a grammar mistake. Please. I pick my words carefully, so quite often "grammar mistakes" were meant to be there. If you are still annoyed at me, go read the Elements of Style. It clearly states that sometimes grammar mistakes are necessary in order for the story to seem more natural and flow properly. If my story is that painful to your precious brain, read something you actually like and leave me alone.
I realize reviews are for improving people's stories. They do not, however, need to be insulting in order for someone to inform an author that:
a) a character is OOC;
b) they have far too many spelling mistakes and might want to look it over;
c) an OC is a bit of a Mary-Sue;
d) a plot leaves something to be desired;
e) the list goes on...
Some things that should not be used:
Text speak. This is for IMs and texts, not stories. It can be confusing and really has no point other than to be lazy.
Mary-Sues and Gary-Stus. Please, have someone read your story before hand and check any OCs that might be in there. I enjoy OCs as well, at times, but if they are perfect they can be utterly annoying.
Flames. You may check my rants above and below for my opinion on this matter.
Reviews that rave and gush, or simply consist of smileys and the word UPDATE! Yes, I realize I have left some update reviews, but I am going to change that. If you are going to leave a review, leave one with a point.
I thank you for trying to help me and my fellow authors out, but there's no need to be insulting. We would appreciate it if you would leave a review that states these things politely and calmly, then leave us to fix our errors. If you recieve a flame that points out something other people have noticed, or is a big problem, and you ignore it, you are being lazy, and I'm sorry, quite possibly deserve the flame. I will not flame you; I will point these mistakes out. Please do not send review replies that say that I was rude. I was trying to help you, and I will simply tell you to look at my profile.
Authors, one final thing: just because people leave sugar all over the review page does not mean someone cannot a right to dislike it. It simply means they either don't have to review, or they should politely state it. I don't have a problem with helping people out, I have a problem with cyberbullying. Flames can be taken the wrong way if they have strong insults in them.
a) Maximum Ride
b) X-Men Evolution
c) Stoked (the cartoon)
d) Phineas and Ferb
e) Three Delivery
f) Code Lyoko (although it's unlikely I'll write stories for this)
h) Wizards of Waverly Place
l) Yu-Gi-Oh 5DS
(not necessarily in that order, of course) So if anyone's written stories for any of those, drop me a PM and I'll check them out.
These lists might get longer the longer I have an account.
Also, I really don't like stories that are just sugary, easy romance. I'm very dramatic, and I just empathize better with tears, sadness, and being in love with the wrong person, the figuring it out and having a happy ending at the very end. If it's a series, either make the characters realize it at the end of the series, have something big happen at the beginning of the next story, something that hurts them emotionally and makes them break up, or have them come close to it, then fight, ect. Some sad endings are also acceptable.
I've been helping my friend Jeni56790 write a story for Twilight. It's called The mysterious girl, and she's published it.