Author has written 2 stories for Naruto.
The Dreaded Plot Bunnies, oooOOOoooo...
I'm probably never going to write them, so by all means rape them to your heart's content. Not like I a have any right to stop you since I can't write them in the first place. Just note me as the creator of your victim.
Highschool Reunions Are The Stupidest Things Ever- Eric Cartman is in town for his 10 year highschool reunion, mostly just to flaunt his considerable wealth and success in the face of a certain red-headed Broflovski. There appears to be a problem, though. The hotel he was planning on staying in burned down (something about a giant robotic chicken. The usual for South Park). So what does he do? Exactly what you expect him to; he leeches on to a friend and everything is back to normal in South Park. Except Kyle's little brother is giving him some really weird looks, and has a tendency to walk into his room shirtless. Also, Stan, Wendy and Kyle are practically married but then again there's not much new there. Cartman/Ike. Yeah, you read that right. Contains Wendy/Stan/Kyle-ish behavior, Stan/Wendy, Kyle/Stan super-best-friendness, a bit of Cartman/Kyle rivalry/borderline slash and a bit of Cartman/Wendy. There may also be other pairings if I feel like it. Oddly enough, I'm actually trying to write this, so ask me if you wanna use it. I tried to model it after an excellent write, Seaouryou's style as well.
Alternative- set about a year after Sonic X, in the Sonic X universe (no Blaze, Silver, Marine, ect.). Cosmo's plant has grown huge (and consequently transplanted into the yard, so don't worry about the workshop) and sprouted an enormous seed pod without ever flowering. Naturally, the Sonic gang watch with anticipation and a growing nervousness. Tails, Cream, and Charmy make a point of visiting the it frequently, talking to it as if it were Cosmo and updating it on the daily events. On the day that Charmy visits, as he sits beside the pod (which he firmly believes is benevolent, despite the older character's misgivings) the seed pod splits and out spills an unconscious Cosmo; or at least a very convincing lookalike. After carrying her to the workshop, Charmy discovers that she has no memories of who or what she is, and her personality is exactly the same as Cosmo's; head in the clouds while her feet trip over rocks. After being introduced/re-introduced to the Sonic crew, Tails assumes that this new Cosmo will want to continue their relationship. However, the newly dubbed Lotus quickly distinguishes that she is not the same as Cosmo. As Cosmo's memories begin to emerge, Lotus is torn between her identity as Cosmo's clone and method of staying with Tails and her feelings for a matured yet still energetic and charismatic Charmy. And Cream's hidden love for Tails and past relationship with Charmy might upset things a bit; because it seems loveable little Charmy has become a bit of a player. Bokkun will get occasional cameos, but that's all the Eggman in the story. So, to get the relationship points straight, the ages are Tails-9, Cosmo/Lotus-8, Charmy-7, and Cream-7, with CharmyXCosmo (/Lotus), one-sided CreamXTails, and extremely slight one-sided BokkunXCream (mostly in the form of jealous glares at Tails and sweets given to Cream). NOT an adventure fic.
Re-Lit- Sequel to Alternative, set about a month later. With what was supposed to be his chance to be with Cosmo again going out with Charmy and calling herself Lotus just to make absolutely sure no one mistakes her for who she was supposed to be (with: him), Tails can't helped but feel a little slighted... and a lot lonely. If the girl who was created purely to be with him ends up with him, Tails isn't feeling that confident in his chances with other girls. With Cosmo, he had a love potion, several bonding near death experiences and the complete lack of other male prospects to help him out. Cream feels unhappy about Lotus and Charmy's relationship for a completely different reason; she's insanely happy about it because Lotus is taken and the guilt that something which makes Tails so sad makes her so elated is eating her up. As Lotus and Charmy's relationship steadily progresses, Tails forces his mind off of Cosmo (and out of his you-know-what) and finally notices Creams decidedly odd behavior around him; and Bokkun's. However, when he questions Bokkun about the reason for his ambivalence towards him, Bokkun declares that he "isn't acting strange at all, and there is NO REASON! IT'S NOT THERE!" Poor Tails is completely bemused and adding Vanilla's blaming him for her Cream's gloomy disposition lately, its possible that he may snap and do the unthinkable: allow those insane, random, alluring urges to take over and kiss Cream, thus ruining their friendship forever. Why would he ever think about doing that to sweet little Cream? It's must be hormones. It's not like... he likes her or anything, right? Because even if Cream is sweet and caring and listens to him ramble on about his machines, she's still just innocent little Cream to him, right? Wrong. Will Tails ever figure why exactly Cream acts so strange around him? Let's hope. Ages are the same as in Alternative, and the pairings are TailsXCream, CharmyXCosmo (/Lotus), and one-sided BokkunXCream. Once again, not an adventure fic.
On the Boat- Vector decides to bring (drag) Espio and Charmy on a "cruise" across the ocean, where, as he puts it, "We get paid to go on a beautiful cruise in return for a bit of hard work!" But we all know what an optimist Vector is. So, on the "voyage of slave labor" as Espio puts it, a storm hits. A wimpy but extremely wet and humid storm. Just Charmy's luck he had flown off from the ship to recapture his sandwich from a rather stubborn seagull flicky. You know what happens to wings when they get wet, right? They get heavy. Charmy plumets into the ocean and curses the seagull as it escapes with his sandwich, but isn't too worried. He's not that far from the ship. Then the real storm hits, and the last Charmy sees of that godforsaken boat is it hauling hull to dry land. Great. They don't even know he's misssing yet. Basically, weird dimensional storm stuff happens and Charmy finds himself on a shore about to be crushed by a ship in the process of shipwrecking. Barely managing to get out of its way, he stares in amazement as a little raccoon girl jumps down and starts saying words that he didn't think even Espio knew. Finally seeing the bee kid staring at her incrediously, Marine decides to say hi, oblivious to the fact that she nearly ran him over with her lousy docking skills. After inroductions ("Oi! I'm Marine! "I'M CHARMY! HI!) are through, the conversation switches to the more important matters ("D'ya want a sucker?" "Yes, please!") and they discover they have a lot in common ("So, are ya stuck on this bloody island too?" "Yup!"). Deciding to work together to repair Marine's wrecked ship and get Charmy home ("Wow, you can do that?" "Why not? I did it once b'fore, didn't I?"). However, one of the Coconut Crew seems to have taken an instant dislike to Charmy and the amount of time he spends with Marine ("You're a bad influence on Cap'n!" "I'M a bad influence on HER?"). Parodies the Sonic Adventure plot, and takes place a bit after the events of said game. Crackfic, Charine optional. Implied Charmy/Marine, implied onesided O.C./Marine (the Coconut Crew dude). The romance level is completely up for alteration. Must try not to villify the Coconut Crew O.C, though. Or maybe there's an actual character to use? I haven't played the game so I don't know the specifics. :D
Ghost's Flutter- a short angsty oneshot with Naruhina. After her confession, Naruto visits Hinata to explain why he can't be with her. But no words are said. Yes, I am aware that it's extremely vague; but I might actually write this as it appears to be a ONESHOT, which apparently is the only thing I can write. Exercise in body-language.
In Need of a Title; Please Suggest- and, no that's not the title hardy-har-har. Hinata centric what-if fic. Naruhina, with implied kibahina and shinohina. In the long months that Naruto is gone, Hinata imagines her life if she gave up waiting for the only one she has ever truly seen. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, but also forgetful. Hinata finds herself aching for his bright smile, as it dims from her memory. And as the light fades from her memory, she cannot help but notice those who sit comfortably in the shadows. Imagined children/families.
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