wingedgrl15
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Joined 12-23-09, id: 2188595, Profile Updated: 04-09-10
Author has written 3 stories for Vampires, and Maximum Ride.

Hi people!

Hey sorry it has taken me so long to update. Hope you like the new chapters on all my stories.

My name is wingedgrl15. But I preferred to be called winged. I was born on July 7 and I am a Cancer. I am in between the ages of 13-20. My hair is reddish with a hint of purple! I am a girl. As if you couldn't tell. I live in the USA! I have two dogs and two cats. They are all cute. I am a vegetarian.I am kinda clumsy. I don't play any type of sports because I am clumsy and unbalanced. It kinda sad if you think about it. I tried surfing a couple of times. I love going to the beach! I wish I could live on the beach. Sadly I don't. :( But when i am older and have my own house I will! I love reviews. I dislike flaming with a passion. I am on Fiction press and I go by the same user name. I just put some poems up. Check it out of you want to. Hope you like them. Uhhhhh... I have alot of friends. Some people, who are not my friends, consider me to be anti-social, emo, goth, a loner, and a few other things. Funnily I am none of those things! I am actually very smart, nice, talkative, and a shopaholic. I hope everyone who reads my stories reviews. If you don't I will send John (one of my characters) after you. I'm kidding. I'll send my weird neighbor. :P Again kidding. I love reading and writing. PM me if you have any questions! Bye. ~winged

I went to the movies on Saturday, January 23, 2009 and saw the movie To Save A Life.It is a great movie and I think you all should see it. It is amazing. All the actors are really good and cute. I wish I could see it again. It you see it or already saw it PM me! Hope you all go to see it. It truely is a great movie!


Here are some random facts about me:

Food: Vegetarian Pizza
Colors: Purple, black, red, green, blue, grey(if it's a color), hot pink.
Interests/hobbies: Reading, writing, taking care of my dogs, hanging out with my friends, talking, singing(even though I'm not good :P), and a lot more but I am to lazy to write it all
Music: All types of music
Bands: All rock bands.
Books:Twilight series, Maximum Ride series, any vampire book, Wicked Lovely series, Night World series, any thing by Sara Dessen
Authors: James Paterson, Andy McNab, Sara Dessen, Ann Rice and much more.
Movies/TV Shows: To Save A Life, Extraordinary Measures, action movies, vampire movies, NCIS, Bones, Wizards of Waverly Place, Toughed By an Angel, Joan of Arcadia, Ghost Whisper, Sonny With A Chance, Singing Bee, American Idol, Survivor, and a whole lot more.

Time for fun stuff:

Lessons Learned in Twilight:

1. You can enjoy the banquet while resisting the wine.
2. The future is not set in stone.
3. Men are crabby when they're hungry.
4. Nothing beats an irritable grizzly bear.
5. True love knows no boundaries.
6. Some people are just danger magnets.
7. Even eternal enemies can work together to save something they love.
8. Forget the fangs - real vampires sparkle!
9. Soul mates exist, even if it takes 100 years to find them.
10. Porshe 911 Turbos make really great bribes.
11. Friendship is like the sun on a cloudy day.
12. Snow just means it's too cold for rain.
13. Family is about more than just blood.
14. What's worth doing is worth over-doing.
15. Losing your temper can be hair-raising.
16. "Vegetarian" has many meanings.
17. Even monsters can hold on to their humanity.
18. There are exceptions to every rule.
19. Always verify bad news before doing something stupid.
20. Hearing voices in your head doesn't necessarily mean you're crazy.
21. Love means being willing to sacrifice your happiness for another's.
22. Cold hands = Warm heart.
23. Not breathing is uncomfortable.
24. Stupid lambs and masochistic lions make quite a pair.
25. Romeo was an idiot.
26. Twilight is the saddest and safest time of day.
27. Extreme sports should not be attempted alone.
28. Life is worth very little without someone to share it with.
29. Space heaters can be very annoying.
30. Love can make even the most miserable places paradise.

One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the local church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem: my husband keeps falling asleep

during your sermons. It's very embarrassing. What should I do?"

"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at specific times.

When I motion, you give him a good poke in the leg."

In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he

said, nodding to Mrs. Jones.

"Jesus!" Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the hatpin.

"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr. Jones nodded off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the

congregation, motioning towards Mrs. Jones.

"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.

"Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long, Mr. Jones had winked off again. However, this time, the minister did not notice. As he picked up the

tempo of his sermon, he made a few motions that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her husband with the hatpin again.

The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"

Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You stick that goddamned thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it up your ass!"

"Amen," replied the congregation

Fav quotes (in random order):

1. Have you ever REALY meet anyone normal?

2. What Twilight taught me: Brunetts can be stupid too (Personal experience... hint: me!)

3. My room not messy, it's creative :D

4. I tried being normal, but i din't like it

5. Ones upon a time, i had a life. then i discorverd reading!

6. When i'm hyper, i'm scary :D

7. Anyone can be a writer, it's the way you bind your words that makes you unique (AMEN! haha)

8. Edward Cullen is not real... GET OVER IT!!

9. Be a loser, because being cool is so over rated.

10. Go away, I am in my emo corner

11. If goth/emo is the new "cool", then why do the "cool" people still look down on them?

Stereotypes suck:

(Bold the one's you are)

SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I’m a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I’m a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
I’m STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly... or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.(I was in band)
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE... So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON"T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems

79 Things to do in an Elevator

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at each floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.
23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell people that you can see their aura.
35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..."
38. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
39. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
40. Sell Girl Scout cookies.
41.On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
42. Shave.
43. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
44. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
45. One word: Flatulence!
46. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
47. Do Tai Chi exercises.
48. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, darn motion sickness!"
49. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
50. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"
51. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
52. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.
53. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
54. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"
55. Leave a box between the doors.
56. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
57. Start a sing-along.
58. Play the harmonica.
59. Lean against the button panel.
60. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
61. Bring a chair along.
62. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
63. Blow spit bubbles.
64. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
65. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
66. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at the passengers.
67. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."
68. If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
69. Bring a water pistol. Soak everyone's shoes.
70. Start brushing off invisible bugs from your arms, screaming "Aaughh! Get them off!"
71. Challenge your neighbor to a "Tic-Tac-Toe" tournament.
72. Laugh hysterically for five seconds, stop, and glare at the other passengers like they are crazy.
73. Charge into the elevator dripping wet, holding a towel and wearing only a bath robe.
74. Mutter something about how husbands/wives always come home early just when it's getting to the good part.
75. Make chalk drawings on the walls.
76. As the elevator is going up, jump violently up and down, shouting "Down! I said down, darn it!"
77. Crouch in one corner and growl menacingly at everyone who gets on.
78. Try to get a game of "Twister" going.
79. Wrinkle your nose and smell the air repeatedly. Sniff your neighbor suspiciously, give a disgusted frown, and take a step away.

15 Things to do when your in Walmart!

1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,

" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

4. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,

"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. then eat it.

9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. ( I love this one! )

11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look

12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" (this one is my fav me and my little sis used to do this its really fun y'all should try it.)

13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..

"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

14. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!

25 Reasons to Thank my Mother:

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why.

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favourite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day when you get your own house i'm going to come in and jump on the furniture, leave the fridge open, and mess with the thermostat!"

To maintain a healthy level of insanity

1. At lunch time, sit in your car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars and see if they slow down

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Everytime someone asks you to do something ask if they want fries with that.

4. When caught sleeping at school/work/wherever you are not supposed to be sleeping and you are woken up shout "AMEN!"

5. Put decaf in the cofee maker for three weeks once everyone has gotten over their caffine addictions switch to Expresso.

6. Skip down the hall instead of walking and see how many looks you get.

7. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face.

8. sing along at the opera.

9. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you have a headache.

10. When leaving the zoo, satrt running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your life! Their loose!"

Kind of amazing how stupid some people are...

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's just a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds with colds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation..)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

5 Things You Must Do At The Mall

1. Go on the merry-go-round!!

2. Use those 1 dollar message chairs!!

3. Leave a trail of pennies everywhere!!

4. Go in Halmark, and open all those singing cards!!

5. Look for suspicious looking characters!! ( usually tall, mysterious, and hot! )

Random Things To Know ( I get this stuff from other people's profiles, I think )

Don't play stupid with me...I'm better at it!

People are like slinkies; basically useless, but ever so amusing to watch fall down the stairs.

I find 'good morning' a contradiction of terms.

Cute but psycho- things even out.

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

My heart is not a playground

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Join the dark side. We have cookies!

I'm not insensitive, I just don't care

I had amnesia once--or twice. You know what? I don't really even remember.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Who doesn't love comebacks that make the other person sound stupid?

Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS!

There are three types of people: those who can count, and those who can't.

If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

Slinky + Escalator = Endless fun!

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is my ceiling.

Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

I'm not a complete idiot - some parts are missing.

Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the frisbee getting bigger?" Then I get hit in the face.

I see regular people! Run for your lives!

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?

Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

If you always stop to smell the roses sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.

If you don't like my driving then stay off the sidewalk!

If you are reading this then step 1 of my EVIL PLAN is complete.

You say physco like it's a bad thing (some people just don't understand)

I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS!

I hear voices, and they don't like you.

Normal people worry me.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

I would be more scared if you were aiming for the person next to me.

What you call stupidity, I call selective understanding.

I think they named oranges before they named carrots. "Hey, what are these?" "They're Orange." "What about these?" "Ah Shit!"

If you're color blind, eating sweets must be a completely different experience. "Come on starbursts, give me red!... LEMON, DAMNIT!"

I'm not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them more.

Don’t mess with me. I've got a stick.

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends.

You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me.

The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.

Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods; Because Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN.

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

I intend to live forever... so far so good

Old enough to know better, young enough to do it again

Embrace the inner rebel - don't sit up straight

Sure I have super powers! I just don't wanna show you

You're awesome... but when the zombies come, I'm tripping you

I am not weird... just plotting

I don't obsess! I think intensely!

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my super powers.

Smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to.

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

I smile because I have no idea what's going on!

One day, your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject

I write for the same reason I breathe; if I didn't I would die

Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

Don't piss me off, I am running out of places to hide bodies!

Whoever said nothing was impossible never tried slamming a revolving door...

You know you're stressed out when you can hear mimes.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Of course I'm out of my mind! It's dark and scary in there!

I'm not afraid of death! What's it going to do? Kill me?

Between two evils, I always pick the one I've never tried.

Friends

When people don't laugh at our jokes we don't think of it as a "You had to be there." type of thing. But more like a "You have to be mentally retarded like us." type of thing.

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. But a best friend will go up to him and say "It's because you're gay isn't it?"

A friend will bail you out of jail. But a best friend will be in the room next to you yelling "THAT WAS AWESOME LETS DO IT AGAIN!!"

A good friend will call your parents Mr. and Mrs. But a best friend will call them mom and dad.

A friend has never seen you cry, a best friend had the best shoulder to cry on.

A friend would stand there laughing at you as you make a fool our of yourself, a best friend, would be up there with you.

A friend would let you have all the blankets on a sleepover, a best friend would leave you cold, and warm you up with a hug when you spit in their ear.

A friend offers you their seat, a best friend let's you sit on their lap.

A friend would tell off your stalker for you, a best friend would tell you how to tease them and mess with their minds.

A friend turns down the music when you ask them to, a best friend turns it up instead of down and smiles.

A friend never asks you for anything to eat, a best friend opens the fridge and makes themselves at home.

A friend will leave you behind if that's what the croud is doing, a best friend will always go with you.

A friend borrows your stuff and then gives it back a few days later, but a best friend loses something and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

A friend would knock on your door, but a best friend would walk right in and say, "I'm home!"

A friend you have to tell not to tell anyone, but a best friend already knows not to tell.

A friend would help you up when you fall, but a best friend would laugh, and then trip you again.

A friend believes you when you say your fine, a best friend will know something is wrong.

Friends say sorry after a long fight, best friends never fight.

Friends get annoyed at you for calling after they have gone to bed. Best friends say, "What took you so long?"

Friends will try to stop you from hurting the substitute you hate, but a best friend would say, "There's a violin case over there."

You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You jump of a bridge, I go get a paddle boat and save your sorry butt!

MORE FUN STUFF!!

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If 2 gooses are geese, then why aren't moose meese, or when 2 foots are feet, why aren't 2 footballs feetballs? Milk tastes funny if you leave it out for too long. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If your random and proud of it, put this on your profile!

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it, put this on your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes or more, place this on your profile.

If you and/or your best friend are insane, put this on your profile.

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile (this happens alot!!)

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile. (This only happened once)

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile (Once!)

If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile. (All the time!)

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile. (Happened the other day.)

if you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.

if you have ever walked into a wall before copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that life without computers is useless, copy this to your profile

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever spent too much time of the computer, copy and paste this to your profile

If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile

you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you agree, that purple bunnies who are high on CATNIP and eat TACOS WILL rule the world, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!

you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste

If you have ever been worried for another person, copy and paste this into your profile. ( On;y happened once... jk!)

If you have ever shouted a random thing and then gotten glared at copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile.

If you love to play pranks on your best friend, copy and paste this to your profile!

If you absolutely love anime guys with long hair, copy and paste this to your profile

If you listen to music and like it because you like the music, not because of the artist, copy and paste this to your profile

If you don't care about who makes the music, no matter how crazy they are (Britney Spears, Marilyn Manson), and you like it anyway, copy and paste this to your profile

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile

If they are right...copy and paste this into your profile (insane laughter)

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile. Only a vegetarian, like the Cullens!

If you like animals, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who haven't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile.

If you have a story in your head, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are a teenager, copy and paste this into your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile!

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would sigh and say: "where to begin?"

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

People (I Do Not own any of these. I got them from other profiles.)

92 percent of American teens would die if Fang told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would tell Fang to get over himself and then shove him back in your basement where he belongs. Then, you would resurrect the 92 percent of overzealous fangirls and use them as your zombie army to take over Canada and rename it Canadia where you would rule as Queen with Fang by your side as your extremely hot king who has no real political power except to stand there and make you look good.

95 percent of American teen girls would rush in a mob to every sperm bank if Robert Pattinson announced that he had donated sperm. Copy this to your profile if you would be part of the 5 percent holding a gun, watching the mob rush by, and picking off the weaklings...

-Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hot-line. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities press 3, 4, 5, 6. If you are paranoid, we know what you are and what you want so stay on the line and we'll trace your call. If you are delusional press 7 and your call will be sent to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer you. If you are dislexic press 6, 9, 6, 9, 6, 9. If you have a nervous disorder fidget with the hatch key until the beep. After the beep, please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again later and if you have low self esteem, hang up; all our operators are too busy to talk to you.

If you Love Love Love LOVE LJ Smith, Copy this to your Profile

If you are a Vampire Addict, Copy and Paste this to your ProfileIf you can't stand stupid girls, Copy and Paste this to your profile

If you LOVE JEZ REDFERN, copy and paste this to your profile

If you almost cried when Jez got staked, copy and paste this to profile

If you think Ash Redfern is Better then Jasper Hale, Copy and Paste this to your Profile

If you think Rashel Jordan is Better than Alice Cullen, Copy and Paste this to your Profile

If you think LJ smith deserves More credit for her Awesome work, copy and paste this to your profile If you want fan girls to SHUT UP AND REALIZE EDWARD CULLEN IS NOT REAL AND STOP SCREAMING IN MY EAR, copy and paste this to your profile

If your one of those people who can literally stay on the computer for hours on in if only you weren't forced to get off, then copy and paste this on your profile.

If you want little kids to stop screaming about Twilight every 2 minutes, copy and paste this to your profile

If you thing RashelX Quinn is better than AliceXjasper, Copy and Paste this to your Profile

If you think HannahXThierry is better than RosalieXEmmett, Copy and paste this to your profile

If you think you have ever had a dream/nightmare that you are married to Edward Cullen, Copy and Paste this to your Profile

If you like Turtles, Copy and Paste this to your Profile

If you think Night World Vampires are better than uh..Twilight ones, Copy and paste this to your profile

If you think Steph and Lj made you loose ur extreme fear of vampires, Copy and paste this to your profile

If you want the voices to stop, Copy and paste this to your profile.

Crazy

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight. Crazy is when you write Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework insted of doing it. Crazy is when you draw Edward's face and hot bod all over your Advanced Placement United States History notes when you should be concentrating on the APUSH final the next day. Crazy is when you yell at fictional book characters for doing stupid things or deciding that you'll give a friend all of the answers for the homework for the rest of your life if he'll find you and Edward. Crazy is when you decide to hunt down fictional book characters and kill them for hurting other fictional book characters. Crazy is when you just said something very serious then burst out laughing. Crazy is writing Vampire and Werewolf history on your history homework. Crazy is when you stare at the wall out of boredom and make up a game with following the cracks. Crazy is when you someone sterotypes you from the little, if any, facts are known around you. Crazy it when you are supposed to be writing a paper but end up writing a story for fan fic. If your crazy and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile and add something to the list.

Guy's point of view

This is very cute! And even written by a guy!

You might agree with it, but when it actually happens 99 of girls don't
realize it 'til it is too late and that guy who did it is so frustrated that
he has moved on to someone who will take notice.

From a guys point of view:

We don't care if you talk to other guys.

We don't care if you're friends with other guys.

But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks into the room
and you jump up and tackle him without even introducing us, yeah, it pisses us
off.

It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without
even acknowledging the fact that we're still there.

We don't care if a guy calls you, but at 2 in the morning we do get a
little concerned.

Nothing is that important at 2 a.m. that it can't wait till he morning.

Also, when we tell you you're pretty/beautiful/gorgeous/cute/ stunning, we
freaking mean it.

Don't tell us we're wrong.We'll stop trying to convince you.

The sexiest thing about a girl is confidence.

Yeah, you can quote me.

Don't be mad when we hold the door open.

Take Advantage of the mood I'm in.

LET US PAY FOR YOU! DON'T 'FEEL BAD'

We enjoy doing it.

It's expected.

Smile and say 'thank you.'

Kiss us when no one's watching.

If you kiss us when you know somebody's looking, we'll be more impressed.

You don't have to get dressed up for us.

If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't have to feel the
need to wear the shortest skirt you have or put on every kind of makeup you
own.

We like you for WHO you are and not WHAT you are.

Honestly, I think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her pj's
or my t-shirt and boxers, not all dolled up.

Don't take everything we say seriously.

Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. See the beauty in it.

Don't get angry easily.

Stop using magazines/media as your bible.

Don't talk about how hot Morris Chesnutt, Brad Pitt, or Jesse McCartney is
in front of us. It's boring, and we don't care. You have girlfriends for
that.

Whatever happened to the word 'handsome'/'beautiful'.

I'd be utterly stunned by a girl who greeted me with 'Hey handsome!'
instead of 'Hey baby/ stud/ cutie/ sexy' or whatever else you can think of.

On the other hand I'm not saying I wouldn't like it either.

Girls: I cannot stress this enough: IF YOU AREN'T BEING TREATED RIGHT BY A
GUY, DON'T WAIT FOR HIM TO CHANGE. DITCH HIS SORRY
DISGRACE-TO-THE-MALE-POPULATION , AND FIND SOMEONE WHO WILL TREAT YOU WITH
UTTER RESPECT

Someone who will honor your morals.

Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest.

Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes.

Someone who will love you, no matter how bad you make them feel.

Someone who will stop what they're doing just to look you in the eyes...and
say 'i love you' ...AND ACTUALLY MEAN IT!

Give the nice guys a chance

Holding Hands- Girls : If you want to hold his hand, gently bump into it a
couple of times.
Guys : Grab it if it happens more than once.

Cuddling- Girls : When you want to cuddle with him, tell him you're cold.
Guys : Automatically move closer to her.

Movies- Girls : During a movie, if he puts his arm around you, tilt your
head on his shoulder
Guys : Lift her chin up and kiss her.

Loving each other- Guys : When she tells you she loves you, look deep into
her eyes, give her a peck on the lips, and tell her you love her too...
And
mean it.

Laying below the stars- Girls : When you're both laying under the stars,
put your head on his chest and close your eyes as you listen to his steady
heart beat
Guys : Whisper in her ear and link your hands with hers. Now
make a wish about something you would like to happen Between you and your
crush...

guys: no grabbing!

Stop!! Stop!! Stop!! Stop!!

If you haven't stopped seriously stop!

Guys repost this if you agree.

Girls repost this if you think it's cute.

Every Guy who isn't a jerk will agree with this, so we hope that all the
girls that read this will repost this

UPS Airlines

Just in case you need a laugh:

Remember it takes a college degree to fly a plane, but only a high school diploma to fix one...a reassurance to those of us who fly routinely in our jobs. After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a 'gripe sheet,' which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers..
By the way, UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit
S: Something tightened in cockpit

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent...
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what friction locks are for.

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed. And the best one for last

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget

You say Soulja Boy-I say Slipknot
You say Miley Cyrus-I say Nightwish
You say T-Pain-I say SOAD
You say Flowers-I say Deathstars
You say Pink-I say Children of Bodom
You say Hip Hop-i say shut the fuk up
You say Pop-I scream Heavy Metal!!
You say hanah montana-i hit you in the face
92 of teenagers have turned to Hip Hop and Pop.If you are part of the 8 that still listen to real music,copy and paste this message if you aggree.
DON'T LET THE SPIRIT OF ROCK DIE!!

You Say Pink
I Say all the colors are beautiful!
You Say Paris Hilton
I Say... who??
You Say Zac Efron
I Say... gay
You Say Pop
I Say Pepsi
You Say I'm Weird
I Say thank you!

PΣΘPŁΣ CHΛИGΣ
THιИGS GΘ ШЯΘИG
BaD THιИG HΛPPΣИS
BUT ŁιFΣ GΘΣS ΘИ

You say: Pink
I say: Black
You say: High School Musical
I say: nightmare before christmas
You say: Paris Hilton
I say: Amy Lee
You say: Zac Efron
I say: Billie Joe Armstrong
You say: Pop
I say: Heavy Metal
You say: Whore
I say: Yes,just not yours

Five Resons Why Bella's an Idiot:

1. She jumped off a cliff and didn't die.

2. She didn't kill Jacob for imprinting on Nessie.

3. What regular person uses the word irrevocably?

4. She can't win an argument with Edward unless its about sex.

5. She's a freaking spaz.

Repost if you agree to at least three statements

BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doe

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, ihatejacob1, .i.love.the.emo.corner., Swimming Cutie xoxo, TwilightHeart21 iluvtwilight4evr, wingedgrl15

May I just say, I want A Jacob. He's sweet, he's kind, he will do anything to win the girl he loves over... even when it is hurting him. He builds cars, he is strong, and hot! (in both ways) He may act like a jerk at times, but he does it to not show how much pain hes in. If you are a proud supporter of Jacob Black, and think he could so kick Edward's ass, show your love

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica, twilightgirl1918, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Pirates OWNS you, Cripsee, I'll have some stupid cliché, EdwardandFangdreams4life, This Sayuri-Sama, Mit-chan007,Ni-Chan, vampgirl8, TwilightHeart21 iluvtwilight4evr, wingedgrl15

If you read Maximum Ride School's Out - Forever in under 5 hours copy this into your profile

If you'll take first watch copy and paste this is in your profile. (inside Maximum Ride joke.)

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you love the whole blind, pyro, mutant, baker thing that is Iggy, post this in your profile.

If you relate everything to Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you still laugh rereading Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Fang is hot...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have a dog, and wish he could talk like Total, copy this onto your profile.

If you agree that Fang is Fangalicious, copy this into your profile.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you have a song in your head, copy this into your profile

There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM

If you would kill to have wings, post this in your profile.

If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile.

If you want to kill Sam and the red haired wonder, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you easily finish one novel a day, copy this onto your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've accidentally called one of your siblings or friends Fang, Iggy, Gazzy, Nudge, Angel or Total copy and paste this is you profile (my friends call me max and i call them Angel and Nudge)

If you love Max Ride and cannot live without it, post this in your profile.

If your view on Maximum Ride is that there are much worse things you could be addicted to, copy and paste this into your profile

If there are times where you just want to annoy people for the heck of it, copy and paste this on you profile.

If you have ever cursed loudly and then realized that a teacher was standing nearby, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over a pillow, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile

If you know there's more to good random humor than saying "cheese", "fudge", or "pie", copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have an annoying trio of girls and/or have an annoying trio of guys at your school who think they rule the Earth, copy this into your profile.

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freakin' Trix, copy this into your profile

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

Weird is good. Strange is bad. Odd is what you call someone who you can't decide what to call them. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which means weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile. .

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and Baa Baa Black Sheep had the same tune.

So, here's how it works:

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend your cool... and alot of the songs fit with the setting

Opening Credits:Love Struck- V Factory

Waking Up:Russian Roulette- Rhianna

First Day At School:The Words I Would Say- Sidewalk Prophets

Falling In Love:I'll Be - Edwin McCain

Fight Song:Hero- Skillet

Breaking Up:Foolish Games- Jewel

Prom night:Into Your Arms- The Maine

Life:Misery Business- Paramore

Mental Breakdown: Brick By Boring Brick- Paramore

Driving:Unbreakable- Fireflight

Flashback:How to Save A Life- The Fray

Getting back together: Breathe- Faith Hill

wedding: I Do- Jewel

Birth of Child:In My Daughter's Eyes- Martian McBride

Final Battle:Goodbye Alice In Wonderland- Jewel

Funeral Song:Angel Standing By- Jewel

Final Credits:Who Will Save Your Soul- Jewel

Did you know...

kissing is healthy.

bananas are good for period pain.

it's good to cry.

chicken soup actually makes you feel better.

94 of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.

lying is actually unhealthy.

you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.

it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.

89 of guys want YOU to make the first move.

it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed. (I've proved this one wrong!)

chocolate will make you feel better.

most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.

a good friend never judges.

a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.

boys aren't worth your tears.

we all love surprises.

Now... make a wish.

Wish REALLY hard!!

WISH WISH WISH WISH

Your wish has just been recieved.

Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...

Your wish will be granted...

Here's a joke...

there are 3 men who need to get across a lake...

the 1st one prays to God asking for the strength to get across...

he gets big muscles and swims across...

but almost dies 5 times...

the 2nd 1 prays to God for the strength and the tools he needs to get across...

he gets his big muscles and boat and rows across...

but he almost dies 3 times...

the 3rd 1 prays to God, for the strength, tools, and the brains...

he turns into a woman...

walks 4 yards...

and crosses the bridge

Ways to Annoy people at the cinema:

Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"

Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.

Clap when the good guy gets killed.

During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"

Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!"

Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.

Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.

Yell out what is going to happen.

Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.

Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is.

Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row.

Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are.

Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.

Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.

Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming.

Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...)

Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.

Try to start a wave.

Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first.

Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window.

Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"

Sing with the theme music.

Bring and use your own air freshener.

At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."

Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off.

Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.

Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.

Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!"

Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.

Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen.

Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late.

When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"

Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.

Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?"

Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie.

Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.

Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat"

Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head.

Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.

When someone walks by you in the aisle scream, "Ahhhhhh! Bad Touch!"

Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself.

Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle.

During a love scene, stand up and run to the screen shouting "Hooters!"

Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room.

Bring a portable air popper, pop your own popcorn.

Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!"

Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!"

Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"

Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can here it, like when the killer’s name is going to be said.

Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones.

Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one.

Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes.

Pass by a room that’s showing a movie you’ve already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the ending.

This is about abortion...

Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine, but i will have a lot of it
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this

My name is Tiffany

I am three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren’t ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can’t do a wrong

I can’t speak at all

Or else im locked up

All day long.

When im awake im all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren’t home

When my mommy does come home

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe ill just get

One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie’s bar.

I hear him curse

My name is called

I press myself

Against the wall

I try to hide

From his evil eyes

I’m so afraid now

I’m starting to cry

He finds me weeping

Calls me ugly words,

He says its my fault

He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And run to the door

He’s already locked it

And i start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken,

"I’m sorry!", I scream

But its now much to late

His face has been twisted

Into a unimaginable shape

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

O please God, have mercy!

O please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door

While i lay there motionless

Brawled on the floor

My name is tiffany

I am three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me

And you can help

Sickens me top the soul,

And if you read this

and don’t pass it on

I pray for your forgiveness

Because you would have to be

One heartless person

To not be effected

By this Poem

And because you are effected,

Do something about it!

So all i ask you to do

Is pass this on!

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE

Try not to Cry

Mommy ... Johnny brought a gun to school,
He told his friends that it was cool,
And when he pulled the trigger back,
It shot with a great, huge crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,
I went to school, got straight A's, and I even got the gold!
When I went to school that day, I never said goodbye,
I'm sorry that I had to go, but Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,
And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.
Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,
And please tell Zack, my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.
And tell my sister; That she is the only one now,
And tell my dear, sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now,
And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest.
Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,
And never to forget this, and please don't let this pass.
Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one though, deserves this,
But Mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try,
I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,
But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest.

When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could,
Please listen to me if you would,
I wanted to go with college, I wanted to try things that were new,
I guess I'm not going with Daddy, on that trip to the new zoo.
I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,
I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy, I must go now, the time is getting late,
Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel our date.
I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know it's true,
And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you."

In memory of the Columbine and Virginia Tech Students who were lost

Her name was Auroura
She was only five
This is what happened
When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic

Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair

She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound

Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endure

A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear
And softly crys
She loves her parents
But they want her to die

She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"God, why? Why is
My life always sinking?"

Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did

Then one night
Her mom came home high
The poor child was hit and slapped
As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made

She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest,
"You deserve to die
You worthless pest!"

The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying

Police showed up
At the small little house
They quickly barged in
Everything was as quiet as a mouse

One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the sad little girl
Lying on the floor

It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms

If child abuse makes you sick and you think it's horrible and should be stopped, put this poem on your profile.

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE by SEXY TIME reviews
sequel to "JUST MY LUCK" EXCERPT: It feels just like just yesterday that I was holding Jake in my arms as he mourned his mother's death. It feels just like yesterday that I seen him die.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 50,275 - Reviews: 139 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 4/12/2013 - Published: 12/5/2009 - Complete
Another Form of the Avian Bird Flu by St. Fang of Boredom reviews
So, Fang gets sick. The flu, to be exact. And, of course, he has to pull a whole 'Whining Macho Prince' thing about it. Max and Dr. Martinez deal with Fang's attitude, Iggy tries to boycott Campbell's Soup, the Flock play with a blender, and...FAX! Eggy!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 68 - Words: 103,238 - Reviews: 4226 - Favs: 1,119 - Follows: 830 - Updated: 3/13/2013 - Published: 10/3/2008 - Fang, Max
Humpty Dumpty by In The Shitty Land Of Oz reviews
They stopped at the front of the room and stared into the eyes of all the students who instantly began to speak in excited voices that couldn't seem to stay hushed. And I knew why. They were all so very beautiful... almost like models.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 12 - Words: 46,084 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 3/2/2012 - Published: 11/24/2008
Never knew I could roll that way by Psychological Witch reviews
I was normal,unitl a phone call ruined my entire life.I woke up and saw a smirking sex god standing next to me.Lets just say I have to get my throne back from my cousin who just happens to want MY man too.So are you in..or out?**Beware a lot of Swearing**
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 23 - Words: 58,405 - Reviews: 166 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 6/11/2011 - Published: 1/2/2010 - Complete
Blood Lines by Queen Of Dead Hearts reviews
Sequel to "Prince Of Blood." You think you know yourself. And then one day you realize you never even knew who you really were. And you never will.
Vampires - Rated: M - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 47 - Words: 126,914 - Reviews: 608 - Favs: 227 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 8/6/2010 - Published: 1/16/2010 - Complete
Masquerade by iluvedward4ever reviews
Never Judge A Book By Its Cover Adalynn and Laya Cameron have their whole life planned for them; killing mythicals. But what happens when Adalynn falls for her assigned target? Bad Summary, good story! Check it out, you won't regret it!
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 13,545 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/14/2010 - Published: 1/21/2010
Maximum Ride, The Volturi Battle by 13crazycheer13 reviews
Maximum Ride/Twilight Crossover. Post MR4, New Moon. The Flock move to Forks. While they're there the Volturi come to change Bella and want Max too. As a last resort the Flock and the Cullens turn to The Pack for help. Check my profile for A/Ns. Enjoy!
Crossover - Maximum Ride & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 32 - Words: 33,916 - Reviews: 832 - Favs: 229 - Follows: 202 - Updated: 7/7/2010 - Published: 8/24/2008 - Max, Bella
Tucker Trouble: Sequal of Totally Amanda by imagination57 reviews
Amanda is now 21,is raising her and Jer's twins and Riley,when a visiter drops by, making her life more complicated than she ever would have expected.Between work,taking care of her kids,you'd think she wouldn't have the energy to fight him? Think again.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 68,111 - Reviews: 171 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 6/25/2010 - Published: 4/5/2009
Impairment by PixieNicole reviews
My life changed as soon as we crossed paths. Things that I thought were fake turned out, it was all true. But after my accedent will things be the same? Wil he stick by my side and help me to rememeber? Teach me of the new found world for a second time?
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,049 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/27/2010 - Published: 1/24/2010
Undeserved Torture by iluvedward4ever reviews
Aaliyah Sable's parents bet for her life, and who she goes too doesn't make her life any better.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 10 - Words: 9,845 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 2/15/2010 - Published: 8/2/2009
Tint of Darkness by vip-vampire in practice reviews
Basically bella is a vampire and she's a wee bit of a nigel and then the Nomads fine her and she meets up with the cullens and your going to have to read on and find out so please reveiw !x
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 439 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/22/2010
Prince Of Blood by Queen Of Dead Hearts reviews
You could know someone your entire life and you think you know everything about them. But then one day you realize the guy your in love with is really a vampire.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 40 - Words: 106,746 - Reviews: 653 - Favs: 341 - Follows: 149 - Updated: 1/16/2010 - Published: 11/11/2009 - Complete
Everlife by maximumride1412 reviews
Amy loses almost everything except for her little brother. A police officer offers her and her brother a place to stay and she accepts the offer. But what she doens't know is the family she is staying with are hiding a huge secret.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,644 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/15/2010 - Published: 1/9/2010
JUST MY LUCK by SEXY TIME reviews
HOW DID I NOT SEE THIS COMMING? I MEAN I HAVE THE WORST LUCK EVER.JUST GREAT. IM LIVING IN A WORLD OF SECRETS AND I CANT LET THOSE SECRETS OUT NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WANT TO TELL SOMEONE. I DONT EVEN THINK JAKE WOULD UNDERSTAND. THIS IS GONNA GET MESSY!
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 20,232 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 12/5/2009 - Published: 10/18/2008 - Complete
Pain by NightWorldFreak reviews
This is a story i wrote. I got a lot of ideas from Night World so i thought this would be a good place for it. Please Review.
Night World series - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,974 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 11/18/2009 - Published: 11/8/2009
Come What May by Melody de Calle reviews
Song-Fic to the song "Come What May" from Moulin Rouge. Rating for non-graphic sex. Fragile Eternity spoilers. Short one-shot.
Wicked Lovely - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 606 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/12/2009 - Aislinn, Seth - Complete
Totally Amanda: The Story Of Amanda Tucker by imagination57 reviews
Amanda Tucker has just moved into Montana this year and has actually stuck with a family, gotten kidnapped by a hot, yet weird vampire, marked by an evil one. Now she is on the run with some rich vampire girl and her dumb sidekick. Can this get worse? Yes
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 112,488 - Reviews: 305 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 2/12/2009 - Published: 9/1/2008 - Complete
Impress Me by CalCurve reviews
Maybe the threat was an empty one, a bluff to get me moving...but considering what was at stake, I couldn't afford to indulge in that hope. Discontinued.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 48,215 - Reviews: 304 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 9/28/2007 - Published: 5/21/2007 - Max, Fang - Complete
Maximum Ride: Take Flight by theultimateshipper reviews
If you look in the dictionary, next to 'crazy', you find my picture. This is my story... mine and my family. And how our whole life was turned upside down. Written preMR3, so no spoilers, although I was accurate on a few things.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 19,593 - Reviews: 215 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 2/17/2007 - Published: 7/22/2006
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

On the Run reviews
A girl named Jessica has been given wings and is kept in a prison cell with five other kids like her. They all want to get out of Itex but it is dangerous. When they get out they are on the run. Okay this is my own flock that I made up. Hope you like.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 15,665 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 5/8/2010 - Published: 1/18/2010
Taken reviews
Alexandra has been kidnapped by a vampire and is going to be forced to merry him. But her caretaker starts to have feelings for her and she feels the same way. What will happen? Well you have to read to find out.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 13,573 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 5/6/2010 - Published: 1/17/2010
Fantasy reviews
I suck at summeries. Megan and her mom moved to Texas because of her moms job. Megan meets the neighbors and relizes something is off. Her mom has no idea what happened to Megan earlier that summer. Will she let him in and tell him what happened or not.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 27 - Words: 35,237 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 4/13/2010 - Published: 1/7/2010