dust on the wind
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 12-31-09, id: 2197445, Profile Updated: 03-16-14
Author has written 43 stories for Hogan's Heroes.

CLOSE MANUS ISLAND NOW, AND LET THEM ALL COME HOME


Currently reading: David Bellos, Is That a Fish in Your Ear?; Malcolm Gladwell, Outliers; Wladimir Kaminer, Karaoke


"Politics is all about converting ignorance into popularity." - Chris Berg, The Drum

Previously:

"If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear." - George Orwell, "The Freedom Of The Press", 1945

"We're on Level 34 water restrictions...you can only water your garden with your own tears." - Frank Woodley, Spicks & Specks

"The first law of hole digging is, when you get to the bottom, you stop digging." - John Hewson, Gruen Nation

"Getting your hackneyed cliches right is not rocket surgery." Peter FitzSimons, SMH

"The standard you walk past is the standard you accept." - Lt. General David Morrison, Chief of Army, Australian Defence Force.

"I may as well tell you that if you are going about the place thinking things pretty, you will never make a modern poet." - P. G. Wodehouse

"Die Erinnerung darf nicht enden: sie muss auch k├╝nftige Generationen zur Wachsamkeit mahnen." - Roman Herzog

"If there is a better world to detach oneself from than the one functioning at the moment I have yet to hear of it." - P. G. Wodehouse.

"Should anyone happen to recognise him- or herself in this story, it means only that they have a better imagination than I do." - Andrea Camilleri, La Pista di Sabbia (The Track of Sand)

"You can't embellish on bad." - Carolyn Miller, Gruen Planet

"Being ditzy is the path to happiness." - Magda Szubanski, Spicks and Specks

"May your words never fail you." - Andrew Denton, Randling

"Whenever you feel an impulse to perpetrate a piece of exceptionally fine writing, obey it - whole-heartedly - and delete it before sending your manuscript to press. Murder your darlings." - Arthur Quiller-Couch, On the Art of Writing

"Really bad art is probably invulnerable to criticism." - Robert Hughes

"Don't stand between a man and his tools." - The Spooky Men's Chorale.

"It's a disturbing moment when you realise that it doesn't matter what you write and how clearly you write it, people will take it a thousand different ways." - Martin McKenzie-Murray, Sydney Morning Herald, 17th May, 2012

"It's not paranoia if they're really out to get you." - L.S.M.

"Ambiguity has its uses." - Column 8, SMH, 10th April 2012

"I'm not interested in moral victories." - Andrew Denton, Spicks & Specks

"You're not meant to read the fine print. That's why it's fine." - Todd Sampson, The Gruen Transfer

"What's the point of rhetorical questions?" - Clive Anderson, QI

"Thing is, I don't believe what I write any more than you believe what you say." - Jeremy Clarkson, Top Gear

"It's not bad grammar...it's just bad semantics." - Stephen Fry, QI

"What it appears to do doesn't prove that that actually is what it does." - Phil Harding, Time Team

"We've redefined success, and still failed." - Jon Stewart, The Daily Show

"That's not unethical. It's advertising." - Todd Sampson, The Gruen Transfer

"There's no Latin name for Maltesers." - Alan Davies, QI

"We need to be confronted. We need to be reminded that nothing is neat, that people do not uniformly share any point of view. We need to remember that disagreement is not the end of the world, merely the start of a healthy discussion." - Mark Pesce, Unleashed, 12th May, 2010

"Fiction is fiction and writes its own histories." - John Sutherland, Curiosities of Literature

"We tried going back to being factual, but soon we ran out of facts." - Jeremy Clarkson, Top Gear

"We do it for the glory, not for the money." - Emma Ayres, Classic Breakfast, March 2010.

"For two hundred years, we've clung to the coastline waiting for the ships to come and take us back home." - David Dale, interviewed on ABC Classic FM in February 2006.

"History is not what you thought. It is what you can remember. All other history defeats itself." - Sellar and Yeatman, 1066 And All That.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

A Lesser Reckoning reviews
Sooner or later, the reckoning has to be paid...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,200 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/13 - R. Hogan - Complete
A Honeymoon In Paris reviews
Marlene has finally achieved her dream. But her new husband has some questions about her past...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,377 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 2 - Published: 3/1 - Complete
The Rest of the Family reviews
Newkirk once claimed to have nine brothers and sisters. His mates didn't really believe it. But as it happens, it was true. Chapter 20: Brothers
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 20 - Words: 39,465 - Reviews: 143 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 1/8 - Published: 3/13/2011 - P. Newkirk
The Substitute Spy reviews
What's a guy supposed to do, when duty calls and nobody else can answer?
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 23,625 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 12/30/2013 - Published: 8/5/2013 - Complete
Tiny Enemies reviews
Don't look now, but something is watching you...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,907 - Reviews: 14 - Published: 10/29/2013 - Hochstetter - Complete
Dangerous Keepsakes reviews
If you hang onto something for long enough, you're bound to find a use for it...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,502 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 7/23/2013 - Published: 6/20/2013 - P. Newkirk - Complete
Doors Are Meant For Opening reviews
Every now and then, before you go ahead and open that door, it's worth remembering what your mother always says. Written for the Short Story Speed-Writing Challenge
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,362 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/25/2013 - P. Newkirk - Complete
All Stations to Ramsgate reviews
He has his identity papers, a rail pass and a packet of cheese sandwiches. What could go wrong? (Written for the Short Story Speed-Writing Challenge.)
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,931 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/25/2013 - R. Crittendon, M. Dubois - Complete
Party Games reviews
If you need to keep your neighbourhood Gestapo man from finding out what's really going on, there's one sure way: throw a party, and don't invite him...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 13,886 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 4/26/2013 - Published: 1/20/2013 - Complete
The Case of the Leidenbach Instrument reviews
Just because it's a violin case doesn't mean the only thing in it is a violin...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 15,532 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 12/26/2012 - Published: 11/8/2012 - Complete
Something To Remember Me By reviews
When love of one's country takes precedence, someone is bound to get hurt. It's part of the price. But sometimes the price is higher than expected...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 38,325 - Reviews: 167 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 11/1/2012 - Published: 5/13/2012 - L. LeBeau - Complete
Seeing the Eiffel Tower reviews
Carter finally gets to visit Paris, just like he always wanted.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,550 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/8/2012 - A. Carter, L. LeBeau - Complete
Volatile reviews
Why was the mess kitchen blown up? Well, that depends - who's asking? For the Short Story challenge
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,256 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/20/2012 - Complete
Old Haunts and Old Memories reviews
The past isn't always as far away as it seems. For the Short Story challenge
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,104 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/20/2012 - H. Schultz, W. Klink - Complete
One Night in Hammelburg: A Girls' Own Adventure reviews
It was just supposed to be a simple catch-up between friends. But in Hammelburg, things never seem to stay simple for long...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 30,168 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 4/27/2012 - Published: 12/15/2011 - Hilda, Helga, Marya, Tiger - Complete
A Long Way From Home reviews
An afterword to "The Bells". Many families never learned what happened to their loved ones, far away on the Eastern Front. But for one father, news is about to come at last.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,723 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 10 - Published: 12/31/2011 - H. Schultz, R. Hogan - Complete
The Bells reviews
Receiving bad news at Christmas is hard. No news at all is worse. Cautionary note: there is no happy ending.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,729 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 12/24/2011 - Published: 12/23/2011 - H. Schultz - Complete
Deep Water reviews
The mission should have been straightforward. But everything changed when the river broke its banks...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 42 - Words: 82,793 - Reviews: 282 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 12/14/2011 - Published: 1/26/2011 - Complete
The Middle Man reviews
Being on the same side is not the same as fighting for the same cause.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,949 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/1/2011 - Complete
Never So Far Away reviews
Impossible things can happen, sometimes.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,069 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Published: 11/19/2011 - R. Hogan, Tiger - Complete
The Switch reviews
Looking just like someone else can have unexpected problems - and unexpected advantages...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 21,191 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 8/28/2011 - Published: 7/27/2011 - A. Carter - Complete
Cabbage Soup and Cold Weather reviews
On the long train journey to the Russian Front, facing the prospect of freezing conditions and certain death, what's there to talk about? Written for the Short Story Challenge
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,153 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 4 - Published: 6/18/2011 - W. Klink, A. Carter - Complete
Handover of Authority reviews
As the Kommandant prepares to relinquish command, there's one question he keeps asking himself. Written for the Short Story Challenge.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,769 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 3 - Published: 6/18/2011 - Complete
Perfect Pitch reviews
The life of an old friend and the safety of the whole operation are at risk...unless Hogan's men can sing their way out of it...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 28 - Words: 44,320 - Reviews: 135 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 4/17/2011 - Published: 11/11/2010 - Complete
Cradle Song reviews
There's no easy way to deal with sad news from home, especially when home is half a world away. A Christmas story. If you weep easily, approach with caution.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,189 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 3 - Published: 12/24/2010 - R. Baker - Complete
Lightly Falls the Snow reviews
Nothing is the same as it used to be, before the war. Especially not Christmas...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,589 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/5/2010 - Hilda, K. Langenscheidt - Complete
When the Black Dog Comes Calling reviews
Sometimes the worst enemy is the one you live with.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,207 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 14 - Published: 11/14/2010 - P. Newkirk - Complete
The Night Bird reviews
Three times before, LeBeau was visited by the night bird. Each time someone close to him died. And now it's back... Cautionary note: supernatural themes. Things could get creepy round here.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 36,356 - Reviews: 116 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 11/6/2010 - Published: 8/12/2010 - L. LeBeau, A. Carter - Complete
Swordplay reviews
If you have to challenge the Kommandant to a duel, it's a real good idea to know how to use a sabre...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,873 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 10/28/2010 - Published: 10/22/2010 - A. Carter - Complete
Deliver it to Papa Bear reviews
"Long ago he had given up trying to estimate what he would find in any house merely by looking at the outside of it." My entry for the Short Story Speed-Writing Competition.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,955 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/2/2010 - Complete
Remedies reviews
When that last symptom refuses to go away, it seems like everyone has a home remedy to offer. Guaranteed to work. Except when it doesn't...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,254 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/5/2010 - Published: 8/4/2010 - L. LeBeau - Complete
Flowers for the Kommandant reviews
It doesn't take much to open the door to forgotten things, and Wilhelm Klink has no idea how a friendship from the past is about to influence his future. Cautionary note - Chapter 2 contains some strong language.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 18,066 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 8/4/2010 - Published: 7/11/2010 - W. Klink - Complete
The Short Fuse reviews
All Carter had to do was build a fake bomb and get it into the middle of the compound. What could possibly go wrong?
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,507 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 7/7/2010 - Published: 6/25/2010 - A. Carter - Complete
Rendezvous reviews
This assignment had to work, if Newkirk was ever to regain the ground he had lost. But nobody could have imagined it would go so wrong...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 19 - Words: 49,017 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 6/22/2010 - Published: 4/29/2010 - P. Newkirk - Complete
As We That Are Left Grow Old reviews
It's not the game; it's how you play it. An Anzac Day story.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,518 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 4/25/2010 - Published: 4/15/2010 - Complete
By Moonlight reviews
Carter knows that acts of sabotage have consequences, but he prefers not to think about it, until a chance encounter brings him face to face with an unexpected situation.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,423 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 4/10/2010 - Published: 3/2/2010 - A. Carter - Complete
A Week in Baden Baden reviews
Kommandant Klink has given himself a week's furlough. Newkirk and Carter do not approve of this. One-shot, for Tirathon's "to use 'be' or not to use 'be' challenge.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 734 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 8 - Published: 4/5/2010 - P. Newkirk, A. Carter - Complete
It's A Jungle Out There reviews
The authorities have said that all the animals that escaped from the zoo have been accounted for. Well, they would say that, wouldn't they?
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 14,902 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 3/25/2010 - Published: 3/8/2010 - Complete
Out of Sight: At the bridge reviews
A prequel to "Out of Sight" - this is how the whole thing started. Contains spoilers, so read the main story first.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,484 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/26/2010 - P. Newkirk - Complete
Out of Sight reviews
Hogan and his men didn't blow up the bridge, and the Underground didn't blow up the bridge, so who did? Newkirk may be able to work it out - if only he can get anyone to listen to him.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 18 - Words: 26,599 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 2/26/2010 - Published: 1/26/2010 - P. Newkirk - Complete
The Waiting Room reviews
Okay, let's see if Hogan and the guys can talk their way out of this one...
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,386 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 15 - Published: 2/16/2010 - Complete
The big ones don't bite reviews
Who would have thought it would be that hard to deal with one little intruder in the barracks? Warning for Arachnophobes - You probably don't want to read this. Really.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,028 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/8/2010 - Complete
Another Time, Another Place reviews
A dangerous mission, and an unconventional agent from London, create a testing situation for one of the Heroes.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 18,717 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/19/2010 - Published: 1/3/2010 - J. Kinchloe - Complete