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Joined 01-09-10, id: 2210067, Profile Updated: 03-25-12

"Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else."

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over

Make a man fire, and he'd be warm for a day, but set him on fire, and he'd be warm for the rest of his life

Stress; a condition brought on by over-riding the bodies' natural desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it

- Passionate Stranger

HEYLO. Mah name's BECCAH. :D

I'm a sucker for 'post this onto your profile if you _', just thought you'd like to know. You have been warned.


MY FANNY PACK. :DDDD


"On a scale of one to crazy I'm a penguin."


"A true friend equals you cry I cry, you fight I fight, you jump off a bridge I get a paddle boat and save your stupid ass."


95 percent of the teenage population would go into panic if Miley Cyrus was standing off a ledge of a 10 story building. Put this on your profile if you would be the 5 percentstanding there with a megaphone screaming Jump You Dumb Bitch Jump!


In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."

On Sunbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands."


I do not do drugs. I do sugar. If you're someone who does sugar, copy this into your profile.

If you think Fang is Fangalicious, copy and paste this into your profile!

If your friend(s) think you’re crazy for reading a book about six flying kids (and their talking dog) and you don’t care copy and paste this is your profile.

If you ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this to your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this to your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

92 of teens would die if Abercrombie and Fitch or American Eagle said it was uncool to breathe. if you are part of the 8 that would stand there and laugh, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to inanimate objects like they were people, and then tried to get others to do it too, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

If you’ve ever made faces in front of a security camera then paste this in your profile

If you have ever said something and two seconds later, completely forgot, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If you wish Max would stop running from Fang copy and paste this onto your profile


The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around and stood up.

He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism


Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy.So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality they are amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.


Things To Ponder:

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops On my desk, I have a work station..
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why do so many old people eat at cafeterias?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?
Why does the word "Filipino" start with the letter F ?
Why are the copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numbers?

if technically after midnight it's
morning, then why do we call it the middle of the night? shouldn't we call it

something like the early morning:-D- (By: RockstarLife)

if you built/lit a fire in an igloo would the igloo melt?
(By: RockstarLife)


Why do people read?

1. Learn how to pickpocket someone
(Alex Rider: Eagle Strike by Anthony Horowitz)

2. Learn how to tell if someone is lying
(Comes a Horseman, by )

3. Learn how to forge a signature
(Trixie Belden: The Gatehouse Mystery, by Julie Campbell)

4. Learn how to take care of: an annoying talking dog; a six-year-old that can read/control peoples’ minds, breathe under water, and talk to fish; a boy with digestive problems that can imitate any sound; an eleven-year-old that talks non-stop; a fourteen year-old boy that is blind, a total pyro, and builds bombs; and a guy only three months younger than you that is totally phlegmatic and very hot. All of which have wings
(Maximum Ride, by James Patterson)

5. Learn how to stop a couple of purse thieves on a motorcycle with a bucket and a bunch of birdseed, and even more pigeons
(Alex Rider: Scorpia by Anthony Horowitz)

6. Learn how to kill a vampire
(Dracula by Bram Stoker)

7. Learn a different language that doesn’t really exist
(Lord of the Rings by J.R.R Tolkien)

8. Learn how to make your alter-self
(The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson)

9. Learn how to escape from a burning building by tightrope walking
(Alex Rider: Ark Angel by Anthony Horowitz)

10. Learn how to fight off a band of bloodthirsty pirates
(Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson)
If you like reading, copy and paste this into your profile.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Journey of Jace Lightwood by Graced reviews
This story is just the Mortal Instruments trilogy told from Jace's perspective. Kind of like Midnight Sun for the Mortal Instruments. Chp.9 is up - REVIEW!
Mortal Instruments - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 28,059 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 149 - Follows: 165 - Updated: 5/9 - Published: 8/12/2009 - Jace W., Clary F.
Darker Than Midnight by M1dnite reviews
Meet Max, your average human teenager; looks, brains and a violent personality to match. But when Max meets Fang she's finally met her equal—a guy who's much darker, more dangerous, than Midnight itself. For with this man, nothing is what it seems...
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 32 - Words: 135,845 - Reviews: 1956 - Favs: 602 - Follows: 509 - Updated: 3/22/2013 - Published: 8/13/2010 - Max, Fang
Signs of Happiness by Lakshyarahita reviews
See the flock giggle, chuckle, and half-smirk -or whatever you call that thing Fang does- drabble by drabble. Fax!
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 66 - Words: 21,876 - Reviews: 493 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 11/17/2012 - Published: 2/9/2010
Cells by behindabruise reviews
Effy Stonem only enjoys Hogwarts for one reason: she sees Draco Malfoy. And Draco's only constant is Effy. They need each other as they are sucked into a whirlwind of darkness when Draco is forced into the world of the Death Eaters. Set during HBP
Crossover - Harry Potter & Skins - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,523 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 8/5/2012 - Published: 12/5/2010 - Draco M., Effy S.
It's a Mystery by Sunshinesque reviews
"What're you doing here! And why are you...why are you naked!" "I could ask you the same question. Not that I mind though. Honestly, Evans, you should dress like that all the time." *Life is a mystery.* -LxJ-
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 100,467 - Reviews: 514 - Favs: 489 - Follows: 313 - Updated: 12/13/2011 - Published: 12/16/2010 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
Night and Day by C.Queen reviews
Andromeda Black is anything but thrilled when she's forced to tutor Ted Tonks, a Muggleborn. The goofy, clumsy Hufflepuff isn't like anyone she's ever met, and he just might be teaching her a thing or two along the way.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 59,123 - Reviews: 466 - Favs: 498 - Follows: 200 - Updated: 7/15/2011 - Published: 10/4/2009 - Andromeda T., Ted T. - Complete
Glass Hearts by Skyecelade99 reviews
Jace and Clary are best friends and are going out together. However, Aline takes an interest in Jace and will do whatever it takes to have him, even if she has to kill or hurt someone to have him. *Second Place for All Human in the MI Awards*
Mortal Instruments - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 58,947 - Reviews: 335 - Favs: 244 - Follows: 156 - Updated: 7/10/2011 - Published: 7/20/2010 - Clary F., Jace W. - Complete
By Any Other Name by DragonWolfStar reviews
Reid shows up at work with a limp and tells Garcia what he did over the weekend. Prentiss and Rossi overhear. Implied slash, not to be taken seriously.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 899 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 11 - Published: 5/5/2011 - S. Reid, P. Garcia - Complete
Ebb and Flow by DragonWolfStar reviews
Neal always knew he'd have to leave, but he'd gotten comfortable anyway. Peter catches up with him before he goes, and learns something new about the ex-con.
Crossover - Chuck & White Collar - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,583 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 23 - Published: 3/5/2011 - Bryce L., Peter B. - Complete
Coffee Run by DragonWolfStar reviews
The day started out so well too... COMPLETE
Crossover - Criminal Minds & White Collar - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 771 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 245 - Follows: 48 - Published: 2/2/2011 - S. Reid, Neal C. - Complete
Fly a Kite by Masquerading with Shadows reviews
"Shall we go fly a kite?" Jade-centric. Jade/Beck.
Victorious - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,371 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/13/2010 - Jade W., Beck O. - Complete
Have your cake and eat it too by citigirl13 reviews
Elena loves Stefan more than life itself; he is her soulmate, her partner, her... Wait, is that cake? Humour and slight romance; K because I'm paranoid
Vampire Diaries - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 770 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 9 - Published: 7/15/2010 - Elena G. - Complete
Brotherly Bonding by citigirl13 reviews
A stupid silly one shot about Damon and Stefan. Enjoy!
Vampire Diaries - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 765 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/13/2010 - Damon S., Stefan S. - Complete
Surprises by SolarMorrigan reviews
Some of the surprises that come as JJ and Reid's relationship progresses. JJ/Reid, oneshot.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 997 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/18/2010 - S. Reid, Jennifer J./JJ - Complete
What's in a name? by citigirl13 reviews
Again, another one-shot. Came to me suddenly, wrote it in under an hour, and I'm pretty pleased with it. I think you'll like it.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,560 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 8 - Published: 5/16/2010 - Elena G., Damon S. - Complete
Uncle Spencer by SayidRocks reviews
Spencer Reid babysits his godson Henry overnight, while Henry's parents JJ and Will attend a family event. A few days later he faces humorous consequences at work when adorable photos of he and his godson make the rounds at the F.B.I.
Criminal Minds - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,604 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 4/9/2010 - Published: 3/26/2010 - S. Reid, Henry L. - Complete
Inquisition by kikofreako reviews
Fang, Dr. Martinez, and the sex talk. I'm sure this will go well. -fax-
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,009 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/26/2010 - Fang, Max - Complete
Through Another's Eyes by Lost In The Stars reviews
Because the story changes when told through another set of eyes. The Hunger Games from Peeta's perspective.
Hunger Games - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 76,947 - Reviews: 1267 - Favs: 909 - Follows: 694 - Updated: 2/24/2010 - Published: 1/3/2009 - Peeta M., Katniss E.
Wedding Dress by DaddyLittleGirl15 reviews
How do you watch the love of your life get married to someone else? What happens to your heart if you do?
Mortal Instruments - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,313 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 13 - Published: 2/10/2010 - Clary F., Jace W. - Complete
Game Over by gethsemane342 reviews
We know why someone would sponsor a tribute. But how do they feel when their tribute dies or wins the Hunger Games? Twenty-four oneshots for twenty-four tributes, sequel to Sponsors.
Hunger Games - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 24 - Words: 11,729 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 10/2/2009 - Published: 9/5/2009 - Katniss E., Other tributes - Complete
The Guide To Getting and Keeping The Girl by Heartbroken Confession reviews
Hyuuga Natsume being able to get THE girl unassisted is like the cat who suckled that monkey. It's just against nature. And then, Nogi Ruka getting THE girl without losing several body parts is a complete Ron Stoppable. "Screw you, Mochi." NxM RxH
Gakuen Alice - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,190 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 115 - Follows: 18 - Published: 9/10/2009 - Natsume H. - Complete
Three Moments by Strawberry Shortcake123 reviews
Fang's POV of what I view as the three most important moments in his and Max's relationship. Oneshot.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,350 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 7 - Published: 7/5/2009 - Fang, Max - Complete
Mistaken Identity by Aspen-SiredBySpike reviews
Matt quizzes Damon about his origins. Damon gets confused, annoyed, and pissed off. Elena keeps the peace.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 523 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 5 - Published: 6/6/2009 - Damon, Matt - Complete
Non Refundable by Pippin's Socks reviews
There is a perfectly logical explanation as to why Jace Wayland is baking cookies at 2 o'clock in the morning, just give the boy a few minutes to come up with something. – JaceClary. For Fiercy.
Mortal Instruments - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 998 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 130 - Follows: 17 - Published: 5/23/2009 - Jace W., Clary F. - Complete
Rating by Phoenix Fanatic reviews
Fang, bored, starts to rate girls walking by along with Gazzy and Iggy. The trio gets more than they bargained for when a familiar-looking girl walks by. Fax, oneshot.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,844 - Reviews: 312 - Favs: 579 - Follows: 96 - Published: 4/5/2009 - Fang, Max - Complete
Hangover by Infinite Rhapsody reviews
Oh, Jace, what am I going to do with you?" "I can think of sheveral thingsh...none of them rated under PG13." Jace comes home to the Institute completely and utterly drunk. What IS Clary going to do with him? JxC. Oneshot. /SPOILERS FOR COG/
Mortal Instruments - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,650 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 17 - Published: 3/26/2009 - Clary F., Jace W. - Complete
James Through The Ages by siriusly klutzy reviews
Lily has always had impressive eyes, and James knew this from day one. A new reaction from James four different times he’s mesmerized by her eyes.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,448 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/18/2009 - James P., Lily Luna P. - Complete
Everybody Loves Jace Wayland by Aspen-SiredBySpike reviews
Everybody loves Jace Wayland; but why? What is so special about him? Through the POV of various characters, you're about to find out.
Mortal Instruments - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 2,426 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 11/2/2008 - Published: 5/6/2008
Perchance to Dream by MarcyJ reviews
Jace has promised to be a brother, and only a brother to Clary. He intends to keep that promise, but in the private confines of his mind, he can see her as he longs to. Oneshot. Jace/Clary
Mortal Instruments - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,148 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 168 - Follows: 24 - Published: 10/11/2008 - Jace W., Clary F. - Complete
Ten Ways by kikofreako reviews
I've told Max a thousand times... she just doesn't hear me. -fax-
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,311 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 13 - Published: 9/13/2008 - Max, Fang - Complete
Twinkle Twinkle by Aspen-SiredBySpike reviews
Raphael stargazes on top of the Hotel Dumort and gets upset at the nighttime sky.
Mortal Instruments - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 175 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/7/2008 - Complete
Runaway Taste Tester by Aspen-SiredBySpike reviews
Being a taste tester would generally be a good job to have, unless the chef you're testing for is Isabelle Lightwood. JaceIsabelle familial friendship. JaceSimon loathing.
Mortal Instruments - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 369 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/14/2008 - Complete
Curious by Aspen-SiredBySpike reviews
Wicked Lovely. Razor sharp, or silky smooth? His hair had intrigued her since she first laid eyes upon him. Implied KeenanAislinn.
Wicked Lovely - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 682 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/11/2008 - Complete
Brilliance by Aspen-SiredBySpike reviews
Jace has lost all hope for Clary, until Isabelle points out the obvious. JaceIsabelle friendship.
Mortal Instruments - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 192 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/9/2008 - Complete
Better In Black by Aspen-SiredBySpike reviews
Jace decided long ago that he looked good in black. He just never knew that Clary looked better. Implied JaceClary.
Mortal Instruments - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 563 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 13 - Published: 4/7/2008 - Complete
alternative by smartalker reviews
You get the whiteout, I'll get the birth certificates. — JaceClary
Mortal Instruments - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 103 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 11 - Published: 4/1/2008 - Complete
Pristine by Aspen-SiredBySpike reviews
Isabelle never got dirty. Jace hated her for it. Jace/Isabelle friendship drabble.
Mortal Instruments - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 264 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/27/2008 - Complete
OMGWTFBBQ! by Kingfishers reviews
The really bad, absolutely horrible, astoundingly stupid fic. Rated T for safety.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,569 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 8/1/2007 - Published: 5/30/2007 - Complete
Linked by Philyra912 reviews
[Not HBP compatible] When a Potions assignment has a rare and disturbing side effect on Draco and Hermione, they will learn more about each other than they ever wanted to know. Runnerup at Dangerous Liaisons Awards, Winner at Dragon's Bride Awards!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 61,588 - Reviews: 2536 - Favs: 4,466 - Follows: 915 - Updated: 1/5/2006 - Published: 6/18/2005 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
The Beautiful Game by gpoy reviews
[Finished] Ah, the world of Hogwarts Quidditch, the game is exciting, the players are worshiped, the commentating is explicit and James wants Lily on his team. Things could get rioty. LJ 7th year.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 105,003 - Reviews: 1060 - Favs: 1,028 - Follows: 154 - Updated: 5/5/2005 - Published: 10/19/2004 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete