Author has written 5 stories for Maximum Ride, and Outsiders.
Salutations. I'm NarniaPrincess21. The name doesn't really mean anything. I just like Narnia. And the number 21.
As long as you struggle, as long as you keep up a fight-no victory is impossible. A quote I found in my jean pocket from Goodwill
Real Name: Unknown to earthlings
Likes:Books, Internet, Family, the grade A, music, movies, friends, dreams, writing, swimming, drawing (I sorta stink at it),sleep, food, nature (swats at a fly, well most of it), elle my dog, Pablo (my unicorn pillow pet)
Dislikes: Justin Beiber, Creepy adults, evil technology, Bad people, when the social studies teacher pauses a info. video clip 15 times to tell us stuff we already know, dresses, waking up, my locks on the lockers at school (they are plotting my demise)
Favorite Books: house of night, maximum ride, daniel x, oliver nocturne, beatuiful creatures, tuck everlasting, chosen by a horse, the hunger games, Howl's moving castle, the forest of hands and teeth, gone, I am number four, Anita Blake series, Rot and Ruin, The Outsiders!,Delirium, many others
Favorite Movies: Underworlds, twilight, prince of persia, tuck everlating, piarates of the carribean, narnia, balto, one night with the king, brother bear, vampires suck, spirited away, Howl's moving castle, many others
Favorite Artists: carrie underwood, tobymac, taylor swift, skillet, rascall flatts, the band perry, toby keith, mitchell musso, sky ferreira,greyson chance, Meg and Dia, Britney Spears, Fireflight, Newsboyz, Hunter Hayes, Lady Antabellum,and a lot more
Favorite Anime/Manga: Claymore, Fruits Basket, Ouran High school Host Club, Munto, Digimon, Inuyasha, vampire knight, Death Note
i love books (I have 106 :D)
When you look in the dictionary to find out what a hermit/super nerd is you find a picture of me.
On June 28, 2011, I was bitten 5 times by a wallaby. In Kentucky. How many people can say that?
Socials may be large, Socials may be rough,
You say Edward, I say Ponyboy.
Nature's first green is gold
"I'm only 14 and The Outsiders has taught me some valuable life lessons:
(This took up 25 pages in word. Just FYI.)
EVIL GENIUS AT WORK. BEWARE.
Life isn't passing me by; it's trying to run me over.
I'm The Kind of Girl who would...
I'm the kind of girl who walks into a door and apologizes.
I'm the kind of girl who would rather act stupid than smart.
I'm the kind of girl who would burst out laughing in a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
I'm the kind of girl who would get fired at the M&M's company for throwing out the w's.
I'm the kind of girl who would rather love a guy from a book than in real life.
I'm the kin I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If 2 gooses are geese, then why aren't moose meese, or when 2 foots are feet, why aren't 2 footballs feetballs? Milk tastes funny if you leave it out for too long. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you’re random and proud of it, put this on your profile!
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it, put this on your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes or more, place this on your profile. (Stupid tennis ball ruining my zone.)
If you have ever tried to lick your elbow even though you knew it was physically impossible paste this on your profile.
If you and/or your best friend are insane, put this on your profile.
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile
If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.
If you have ever walked into a wall before copy this
If you think that life without computers is useless, copy this to your profile
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever spent too much time of the computer, copy and paste this to your profile
If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
You spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile
You haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
I'm a girl who gets drunk off soda and loves every minute of it.
If you still laugh rereading Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an Amerian Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
On the bag of Peanut M&M
If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven. Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile. 96 percent of teens won't stand up for Christ. If you are one of the 4 percent that will, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever misspelled "the" on either your keyboard, or a paper, or both, copy and paste this into your profile.
20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. Don't use any punctuation.
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity .
Post this on your profile to make someone smile!
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Maximum Ride, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, The Lonely Teenager, AliceDaSpaz, Skittle.Rocke, Silent_Broken_Heart, St. Fang of Boredom, flyaway111,MyIllicitLover, Shadowed White Rosebud, Ana3498, NightGirl25, Fragrance-Of-The-Paradox,physics chick, CrazyNerdyFangirl, Safira Rue Mellark, The Fabulous Killjoy, HungerGamesMaxRide,NarnianPrincess21
If you have ever had a dream involving any fictional character, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with Fanfiction, put this into your profile.
If you've ever wondered what you're like in a parallel universe, put this on your profile.
If you believe in God and Jesus Christ his Son copy and paste this on your profile.
If you probably need a life but have no intentions of getting one, put this on your profile.
If you haven't and never will smoke, drink, (Like get drunk and do something stupid. Occasional wine and church wine is fine) and do drugs and are proud of it, (Which you are!) copy this into your profile.
92% of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you're part of the 8% that would be laughing your butt off.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.
Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"
If you have ever ran into a door, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think it's stupid that girls are automatically labeled with the color pink, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are against animal cruelty, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this to your profile.
Ninety-eight percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy this and paste it in your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
I find abortion wrong and selfish, this was depressing, sad, and moving.
You know what Mommy
You went to the doctor today.
I can hear that doctor again.
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
One more heart that will never love
If you're against abortion, re-post this
Saddest Poem Ever: I cried, can you not cry to this?
My Boy Side
You love hoodies.
Your Girl Side
You wear lip gloss/stick.
I’m a girl. Fail.
I messed up of my teenage life...
kissed someone before dating
Multiply by 3
Total- 42, crap.
At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping it all over his lap.
When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him by never even bothering to practice.
When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by jumping out of the car and never looking back.
When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.
When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.
When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion. You thanked him by telling him he had no taste.
When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp. You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.
When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug. You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.
When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You thanked him by taking it every chance you could.
When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him by being on the phone all night.
When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked him by staying out partying until dawn.
When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.
When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you how deep he loved you. You thanked him by moving halfway across the country.
When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him. You thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their children.
And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came crashing down like thunder on YOUR HEART.
If you love your dad, post this on your profile
Stereotypes That I Hate That I Take Personal Offense To
I'm a GYMNAST, therefore I MUST be a whore.
I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life. (Actually this might be true)
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay. (But I'm a girl . . .)
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I HAVE GAY FRIENDS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm WHITE and have black friends, so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over-controlling and a bitch.
I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.
I am a FANGIRL, so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker. (Um . . . no comment.)
I'm INTELLIGENT, so I MUST be weak.(I'm strongish...)
I am AMERICAN, so I MUST be an obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I am QUIET and POLITE, so I MUST be a pushover. (Most of the time I'm quiet and polite. Piss me off and you'll see otherwise.)
I use GOOD GRAMMAR, so I MUST be a snob.
I prefer FANTASY and SCI-FI, so I MUST be out of touch with reality.(umm... maybe just a touch...)
I love TO LEARN so I MUST be boring. (Talk to my friends and you'll realize I am anything but boring.)
I'm WHITE, so I MUST be a racist.
I am a GIRL, so boys MUST be better than me at sports. (I'm not gonna say anything because mesports=BAM! Our team's doomed.)
I am a GIRL, so I MUST only be good at work. (Ha! Oh, you make me laugh . . .)
I am WHITE and I like to DANCE, so I MUST be lame.
I am SKINNY, so I MUST be sensitive about my weight.
I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST go to church every Sunday. (Bah!)
I am a CHRISTIAN/CATHOLIC/ANGLICAN/PROTESTANT, so I MUST not do anything on Halloween. (I dress up every year. Our church even does something.)
I am POOR, so I MUST not have good hygiene.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser. (I'm not a faker.)
I like READING, so I MUST be a Loner. (My friends annoy me to no end sometimes, but that's what makes them great.)
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish. (I'm very mature.)
I like to READ, so I MUST do nothing except read. (I'm on here, aren't I?)
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST like to talk about crushes, dolls, not getting my clothes dirty, and parties. (Ok, first off, I don’t like crowds=parties. Second, I love getting dirty. Country girl all the way, baby!)
I don't STUDY much but still get STRAIGHT A's, so I MUST be cheating. (No, I just pay attention.)
I don't think VEGETARIANISM makes sense, so I MUST think all vegetarians are hippies.
I'm easily ANNOYED, so I MUST be bratty.
I LISTEN TO ROCK MUSIC, so I MUST be a rebel.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST love cute/fuzzy animals. (Ok, I do like cute animals.)
I grew up with a SMOKER/ALCOHOLIC/DRUG ADDICT; therefore I MUST be one myself. (Never touched a cigarette in my life. The lighter, on the other hand . . . It's my calling.)
I wear GLASSES, so I MUST be a nerd who makes straight As. (I’m embracing my nerd. Deal with it.)
Questions to Ponder...
Why can pizza get to your house faster then an ambulance?
Why are they called apartments when they all stick together?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
Am I the only one who finds it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is abbreviation such a long word?
If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?
When the guy first discovered milk...what do you think he was doing?
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
19. My mother taught me ESP.
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
You say Lady Gaga, I say Lady Antebellum.
Copy and paste this onto your profile if you believe in any of this. Spread the word of Anti-Bieber!
YOU SAY PLAYBOY
People laughed when I said shark boy was hot! WHO'S LAUGHING NOW!
I'm not the kind of girl that notices everything going on around her. No, I'm the girl that’s in the middle of class reading a book, and doesn't notice when a tennis ball whizzes past her head, practically touches her, and the whole class is laughing and staring at said girl. Yeah, I'm that girl. Get used to her, cause it'll probably happen a lot.
.••) .•) .•.•) .•)
THE STORY OF JACK SCHITT
Jack: It's pronounced "shit", don't get it wrong.
Who is Jack Schitt, you ask? The lineage is finally revealed! Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt." Now you can intellectually handle the situation!
Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O Schitt, the owner of Kneedeep N. Schitt, Inc. In turn, Jack married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' wishes, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married for 15 years, Jack and Noe divorced.
Noe Schitt later married Mr. Sherloc, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock. Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a nervous son, Chicken Schitt.
Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout their childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the "Schitt-Happens" wedding. The children of the Schitt-Happens are Dawg, Byrd and Horse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left the home to tour the world, and recently returned from Italy with his new bride, Pisa Schitt.
So now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!", you can correct them.
Girls, don't take it if he hits you. If he hits you, hit him back twice as hard and break something like he broke your heart. Hit him like the girl you are.
If you still laugh rereading Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile
Me: Did he just say Hannah Montana?
Me: -carrying a armload of stuff to the basement- Pray that I don’t fall
Me: why do you say “I’ll put my two cents in” if a thought is worth a penny? Where does the other cent go?
I think your dad is driving...Imma annoy hime till he throws ur phone out the window. My friend txt me
Ooohhh that felt tingly. One of the autobots after walking into the power line.
Does that make you mad to use that word? If you want we can call it Sam’s happy time. Sam’s mom on transformers.
I just want one guy to come up and say to me "sorry my whole entire gender sucks"
My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil
Having a guy dump you and say "We can still be friends"
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one. (Yes, you will one day bow to me. MAHAHAHAHAHA.)
"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no flipping way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating student as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh crap, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole." - Fang, Diary of a Love-sick Mutant
"Would it be better to live in a world of ignorance and happiness or a world of truth and pain? Well, I would pick whatever world had McDonalds." – Fang in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
“I don't know why girls are all, "I want to be like Romeo and Juliet!" I mean, I hate to spoil the ending, but they die. I mean, seriously. Girls need lives. Badly. I'm sure they're somewhere on EBay.” – Fang in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
"Mhmmm. I believe you. Completely. One hundred percent. Now shut up and let me ruin your life." – Max in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
"Always better pissed off than pissed on." – Fang in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
"You assaulted an un-armed teenager, you snuck out in the middle of the night, and you, you…I don't know what else you did but I bet it has something to do with why the national debt is so high!" – Max in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
"Bacon is edible sex." "You know, Iggy that takes the cake for the most random comment I have ever heard in my entire life. So why exactly are you thinking of bacon – and edible sex, for that matter?" "I was thinking of what could cheer you up. Naturally, I thought of sex, bacon, and cake." "You are a very simple person." "I never said I wasn't." -- Iggy and Fang in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
“Men don't shout for anything, unless it's for a second helping of meat.” – Fang in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
"If you give me the camera, everything will be so much easier! World hunger will stop, nuclear weapon production will cease, and Miley Cyrus will stop singing! We'll all be saved!" – Fang in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
“Just so you know, trying to get on Max's good side is about as hard as making Iggy choose between a pound of bacon and a trio of Russian playboys. In other words, impossible.” – Fang in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
“God bless Google. Where would we be without it? We'd probably be some cannibalistic Neanderthal society.” – Fang in Phoenix Fanatic’s Diary of a Lovesick Mutant
Angel, honey, please, stop screaming in my head. I already have a headache as is, I don't need a six-year-old PETA member yelling at me because of a movie. Max in Rainy Day Games with The Flock
Girls are like the Bermuda Triangle. They're mysterious and weird and will probably end up killing you. Fang in Diary of a Lovesick Mutant by: Phoenix Fanatic
"But you know, we should be sneaking into, like, Area 51 or something. Not Canada. What, are the moose going to shoot us?" Iggy in Diary of a Lovesick Mutant by: Phoenix Fanatic
We landed immediately, and we instantly transformed into badass werewolves who were out to get bloody revenge for our slain kinsmen.
All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.
Slinky Escalator = Endless fun!
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is my ceiling.
Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
I'm not a complete idiot - some parts are missing.
Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the frisbee getting bigger?" Then it hits me.
I see regular people! Run for your lives!
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.
If you always stop to smell the roses sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.
If you don't like my driving then stay off the sidewalk!
If you are reading this then step 1 of my EVIL PLAN is complete.
You say physco like it's a bad thing (some people just don't understand)
I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS!
I hear voices, and they don't like you.
Normal people worry me.
I think they named oranges before they named carrots. "Hey, what are these?" "They're Orange." "What about these?" "Ah Shit!"
If you're color blind, eating sweets must be a completely different experience. "Come on starbursts, give me red... LEMON, DAMNIT!"
I'm not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them more.
Don’t mess with me. I've got a stick.
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three
I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends.
You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me.
The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.
Therapist = the/rapist... scary thought
Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods; Because Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
I intend to live forever *looks at watch* so far, so good
Old enough to know better, young enough to do it again.
Embrace the inner rebel - don't sit up straight
Sure I have super powers! I just don't wanna show you
You're awesome... but when the zombies come, I'm tripping you
I am not weird... just plotting
I don't obsess! I think intensely!
I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my super powers.
Smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to.
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
I smile because I have no idea what's going on!
One day, your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions
One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject
I write for the same reason I breathe; if I didn't I would die.
Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
Don't piss me off, I am running out of places to hide bodies!
You know you're stressed out when you can hear mimes.
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Of course I'm out of my mind! It's dark and scary in there!
I'm not afraid of death! What's it going to do? Kill me?
Between two evils, I always pick the one I've never tried.
A friend will comfort you when he rejects you, Best Friend well go up to him and say "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
My did you know? Questions:
Start of School Year:
I hate when
Friend: Dude you left your phone at my houseHello?
A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.
People make too many Harry Potter jokes
Just coming home from hanging with friends *...
Boy: "Hey baby, want to come over tonite?" Girl: "Sure! What do you want to do?" Boy: "I'll give you a hint. It involves pillows and blankets ;)" Girl: "OH MY GOD! WE'RE GONNA BUILD A FORT!?"
I'm the type of person who looks both ways when crossing a one way street
You're deep enough in the closet that you can find Narnia.
I hate when you check your voicemail and the voicemail lady says, u have 1 unheard message and u go I KNOW THATS WHY IM CALLING!!!
When I die, I want someone to keep updating my facebook status to freak people out...
"Spell SPOT three times." "S P O T, S P O T , S P O T, S P O T , S P O T" "What do you do when you come to a green light?" (Answer is invariably-) "Stop!" "Wait, at a GREEN light?"
Who else opens a calendar to the month of their birthday, just to look and see how cool the picture is?
Welcome to America, where gay marriage isn't allowed in all states, but a woman can get away with murdering her own daughter.
There will always be a 'lie' in be"lie"ve, an "over" in l"over" an "end" in fri"end"s, "us" in tr"us"t and an "if" in l"if"e - a quote to live byK.T.D.G
You run like crazy from the dark where no one is thinking some killer from a movie is behind you
The awkward moment when you are drawing in class and the teacher calls on you and you just sit there
"We're all gonna die ... but I got a helmet."
"Procrastinators unite ... tomorrow."
"Amateurs built Noah's Ark. Professionals built the Titanic."
"Everybody is insane. When we realize that the world will be a better place."
A word to the wise isn't necessary; it's the stupid ones who need advice.
Don't follow in my footsteps; I walk into walls.
People who say anything is possible, haven't tried to slam a revolving door
You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!
Last night I lay in my bed looking up at the stars in the sky. They were amazingly beautiful, but the only thing I could think of was: What the hell did I do to my ceiling?
The shinbone: A device used for finding furniture in a dark room.
If you've ever had a crush on an book character copy and repost this onto your profile.
Stress: The body's punishment for overriding the desire to strangle some jerk who deserved it
"I want to be just like I am." "So you want to be a nobody?"-ME and my 9 year old sister, yeah she's in the popular crowd
When in doubt, use explosives ( call Iggy and make him blow it up for you)
" I am cone sold stober." - Howl in Howl's Moving Castle
"... This place is pretty Aberzombie. I'm not sure we've got a lot of closet cosplayers waiting to embrace their inner Inuyasha."Maddy:Gamer Girl
-me and my family walks in with helmets- "Are ya'll out walking?" My great-grandmother when we came over just before going bike riding.
"Never trust a guy in a tunic." A guy in the movie Land of the Lost
Oh man, what’s all this ruckus about out here? Inuyasha
Sniffing around on all fours won’t get us any closer to Naraku’s castle, will it? Sango
Bye, come back soon and don’t forget our yummy ninja treats, Ok kagome. Shippo
Servant: -whispers- if you are noticed you will be killed.
Inuyasha *under that rock yell: "KAGOME!"
Inuyasha: if you people are hiding anything from me, I swear, I’ll destroy your whole village
Inuyasha: don’t just stand there, start looking for the sacred monkey stone…ow
STONE WIELDER BOULDER CLEAVER!
Kagome: Lets start with you, Inuyasha. What do you want most?
Kagome: Sit boy!
Awesome Maximum Ride Quotes:
"I love Nudge, Nudge is a great kid, but that motor-mouth of hers could have turned Mother Teresa into an ax murderer."
"Man, those are some dang ugly birds."
"Can you giggle while racing for your life and protecting a six-year-old? I can."
"Fang glanced back in the rearview mirror. 'Does anyone want to sing Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall?' we all screamed no at the same time."
"Screw you Voice."
"I look like prep school Barbie. Actually, you look like prep school Barbie. I'm just one of her friends."
"And we're falling for this because of our sudden, unexpected regression into unbelievable stupidity?"
"I vill now destroy de snickuhs bahrs!"
"Plan Delta: run like hell or fly like hell."
"For God's sake, Nudge, my ears are bleeding!"Iggy
"Nope," I said. "We're kinda low-tech than that." Like, having Kleenex would be a huge step up for us. Max
"'You were designed to be very smart, Max,' she told me. ‘We electrically stimulated your synaptic nerve endings while your brain was developing.' 'And yet I still can't program my DVD player,' I said." The director and Max
"What happened to your tan?' 'It was dirt'" Fang and Max
"it's the ciiirrrcle of liiiiffffe”Iggy
"A hamster called. He wants his home back."Max
A poem By: Max
White is the color of little bunnies with pink noses
White is the color of fluffy clouds fluffing their way across the sky.
White is the color of soft-serve ice cream in a cone
White is the color of angels’ wings and Angel’s wings
White is the color of brand-new ankle socks fresh out of the bag
White is the color of crisp sheets in schmancy hotels
White is the color of every last freaking, gol-danged thing you see for endless miles and miles if you happen to be in Antarctica trying to save the world, which now you are so sure you can do because you feel like if you see any more whiteness- wonder bread, someone’s underwear, teeth-you will completely and totally lose your ever-loving mind and wind up pushing a grocery cart full of empty cans around New York City, muttering to yourself
You have now indured a super long profile. You can die in peace.