Author has written 1 story for Torchwood.
Well, I'm an Aussie and I LOVE Torchwood and Doctor Who. They are officially my all-time favs on the screen. Muse is my favourite band and I couldn't live without their music. It totally helped me survive through depression. I guess thats pretty hard to come by, I mean have you met any fifteen year olds who have survived depression three times (and not once because of a man!) via music? Anyway, I'm somewhat cured from that now.
My stories usually don't include a lot of dialogue because I can't really write about people speaking. Not sure why that is but hopefully I'll get better at it.
Ciao for now!
I am the girl ... that doesn't go to school dances, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book.
I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal.
I am the girl that people call weird, and a freak either behind my back or to my face.
I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cellphone or regular phone.
I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year.
I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain.
But I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn't care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Torchwood, who can express herself better with words, and knows the importance of the little things.
Copy and Paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest times that they are unique, but not alone.
~PrettyFanGirl, Truth Be Told 13, DEFiiANCE, Angel of Apathy, EriinR, Storms-Are-My-Nature, HaruhixHikaru, doctor-who-fangirl, AmIreallyarodent
1) Being gay is not natural. People always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.
2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Briteny Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans... --
Re-post this if you believe in legalizing gay marriage
Who is your favourite Doctor? David Tennant Hands Down!! The dude's awesome!
What is your favourite episode? That's way too hard!
Who is your favourite companion? Martha
Who/what is your favourite villain/monster? The Master in The End of Time part one and two
Who do you ship? No one really
Chris or David? David!!
Rose or Martha? Martha
Rose or Donna? Donna
Donna or Martha? Martha
Daleks or Cybermen? Daleks! makes wierd "exterminate" noises with rubber plunger in hand
River or Reinette? Reinette
What's your fave piece of Who merchandise? Blow up TARDIS!!
Who's your favourite member of Torchwood? Its a tie between Ianto and Owen. Owen because he's frickin hilarious "Well, thank you for that Disney moment" and Ianto because He's my man! Hands off! Whacks you with frypan
What's your favourite episode? Captain Jack Harkness, Cyberwoman, Random Shoes, From out of the rain, Reset, Dead Man Walking, A Day in the Death, Fragments and many more!
Jack/Ianto or Jack/Gwen? Definitly Jack/Ianto! What they have is soooo damn special!
Who is your favourite Doctor from the Classic series? Fourth
Who is your favourite companion from the Classic series? Sarah Jane
Which Classic series character would you love to guest-star in the current series? Sarah Jane but she already has!
Who would you like to be the next Doctor? I really don't know. Haven't got a clue
Who do you want to be the next companion? Maybe a bloke or maybe an alien!
Whovian and PROUD OF IT!!
If you've ever wondered what you're like in a parallel universe, put this on your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, put this in your profile.
JANTO. JANTO. JANTO. JANTO. JOIN THE CULT OF JANTO! (If you too love Janto, copy and paste this to your profile)
Jack/Ianto from Torchwood I love completely. That is AMAZING AND GREAT AND MY FAVOURITE SHIP COMPLETELY AT THE MOMENT!! GO JANTO!! Join the Cult Of Janto.
Join King Ianto's coffee club!
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do so at random moments, copy and paste this in you're profile.
If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.
If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
If you are cursed so that your favourite character in a TV show/movie/book either dies or turns evil or leaves, copy and paste this into your profile.
If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.
If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever actually read these things, copy and paste this into your profile.
If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think that life without computers is useless, copy this to your profile.
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or the vise versa copy this into your profile.
If you are a bookworm, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list. stateofmind7337, Shadowxwolf, tvnut89, Me-Lissa1991, VampireTimeladyKay, doctor-who-fangirl, AmIreallyarodent?
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy this into your profile!
If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile.
If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Whether it's between a male and a female, a male and a male or between a female and a female, love is love. Copy this to your profile if you agree.
If you are a proud shipper of whatever you ship, put this in your profile.
If you've ever felt guilty eating an apple because 'An apple a day keeps the Doctor away', copy and paste this into your profile.
For me, crazy is a loose term.
Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser.
Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on.
Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do.
Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight (or almost, at least).
Crazy is when you write Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework instead of doing it.
Crazy is when you act completly, well, crazy and make a total fool of yourself and not even care.
Crazy is when you dedicate your entire being(every cell in your body) to Eragon, Star Wars, and fanfiction.
Crazy is when you go into build-a-bear workshop and walk up to little kids saying "That's my favorite bear" in a creepy voice and then run like heck when their soccer-moms glare at you.
Crazy is when you get jacked up on sugar on your school excursion to bush gardens, laugh for two hours straight WHILE riding rollercaosters, then still laugh after you get slapped by your friends, and they pour a cold water on you, and you just stop suddenly, and when they asked why you laughed you say " I felt like it."
Crazy is when you claim you can walk on water and then get your best friend to hold you by your waist in the air and you move your legs in a walking movement (It works!!)
Crazy is when you fight with your friend over which vegetable you want to be.
Crazy is when you say pineapple and then threaten to slap someone if they even mention the word; claiming that it's yours.
Crazy is when you have a whole glass of coke in one go and go so hyper you laugh for several hours straight and bounce on your knees on your friend's bed until it breaks (it was an accident okay).
Crazy is when you walk up to random people in the swimming pool and do a Rose Tyler impersonation and ask what planet your on.
Crazy is when you walk up to someone you've never seen before in the street and sprout some random technobabble that ends with "And that's why you should always carry a banana around with you."
Crazy is when you ruin your science exams by answering them using only Gallifreyan numerals and covering it in other random...alien symbols, and then trying to pass it off as legitimate to the Head of Department, by claiming that really, you honestly are a timelady from the planet gallifrey.
Crazy is when you download all of the Eurovision songs and give them to the DJ at the biggest party of the decade!!
If you're crazy and crazy about it, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done too.
If you have ever stared at a computer screen for hours and hours reading stories that people who have no lives whatsoever and have enough obsession with something to write a story about it have written, and you are one of the aforementioned people, copy and paste this into your profile.
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.
If you actually take the time to read copy and pastes, copy this onto your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.
If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever done the above on purpose, put this in your profile, also.
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similiar, copy this into your profile.
If you hear the voices of characters in your head, put this onto your profile.
If there are times when you just wanna annoy people for the heck of it then copy this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen UP stairs, add this to your profile.
Recent studies show that 92 per cent of teenagers have moved onto rap. If your part of the eight per cent that stayed with rock, put this in your profile. ROCK ON MUSE!!
98 of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this into your profile.
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929,SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin,The Komodo Dragon Phoenix,Bust_A_Groover, Tecna, Triggonseed, The Only Innocent Writer Here-Yumi, EstellaB, NarnianMelody, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Vampiress19, edwards-gurl123, Production of Punk, Victorian La Belle, hansolofan, VampireTimeladyKay, doctor-who-fangirl, AmIreallyarodent
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have nothing to do but to copy this into your profile, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.
If you are Doctor Who/Torchwood obsessed, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy this into your profile.
If you really don't understand how this could accomplish anything, but do it anyway, copy this into your profile.
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.
If there are characters on a certain show (no need to mention names) that you HATE BEYOND ALL REASON... copy and paste this into your profile. G.W.E.N.Y.O.U.T.H.E.I.V.I.N.G.B.L.E.E.P.H.O.W.D.A.R.E.Y.O.U.T.R.Y.T.O.S.T.E.A.L.J.A.C.K.F.R.O.M.I.A.N.T.O.
A large percentage of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you are one of the ones that do and want to deck 'em, put this in your profile.
If you think Writer's Block is evil, put this in your profile.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile!
If you think homophobia is wrong, copy and place this into your profile.
If you hold the nasty habit of saying you don't flame, but secretly love flaming people that flame John Barrowman and David Tennant, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you like David Tennant more than Orlando Bloom, copy and paste this into your profile.
...For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH (or part Irish), so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have BIG BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil. (sorta a goth...)
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts (It's actually called a kilt)
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast (when I can help it)
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I MUST be an arsonist.
I'm a TEENAGER so I MUST be about to bash your head in with a brick.
I'm a TEENAGER so I MUST be about to steal all your stuff.
I'm a TEENAGER so I MUST be stupid and the tests are getting easier.
I'm a TEENAGER so I MUST wag school.
I CRY easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
29 reasons why girls are the best
1.We got off the Titanic first
2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.
4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.
6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.
7. Taxis stop for us.
8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).
11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.
12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.
13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.
15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.
18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.
19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.
22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.
23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.
25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.
26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.
28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark
Hippopotomonstrousaequipodaliophobic - Fear of long words
Do you want to know why I'm still on earth? Heaven kicked me out and hell is afraid I'll take over!
Live forever, or die trying.
"We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police do."
God made man, and then said, "I can do better than that," and made woman.
Engineering: 'How will this work?' Science:'Why will this work?' Management: 'When will this work?' Liberal Arts:'Do you want fries with that?'"
Where are my crayons?"We could all take a lesson from crayons: some are sharp, some are beautiful, some have weird names, all are different colors, but they still learn to live in the same box."
A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.
Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.
I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name.
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.
I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people.
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.
If you ask me anything I don't know, I'm not going to answer.
It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.
Life is hard. After all, it kills you.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
And that's only a little bit about me!