Poll: Should Fem. Itachi or Fem. Haku be included as the fifth member of the harem? Vote Now!
Author has written 3 stories for Dragon Ball Z, Anime X-overs, Naruto, and Dragon Ball GT.
Hey Everybody! I am the legendary Masteria! That means I can master any materia, MWAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA! Fear my POWER! lol just kidding. I'm just a fresh author looking to write stories, when I get inspiration for them. If you don't like them, the solution is simple... DON'T READ THEM!
Profile Updates to occur as I complete or get close to completing stories.
OCs: Michael: age 25, 160lbs. Brown eyes and Black hair. Pale-white skin. When he take a trip to the fair, he ends up finding himself in a whole universe of trouble. Can he survive long enough to make it home?
Kuron Sekushi: Age 10, 100lbs. Dirty Blond hair, pink-ish skin and green-ish blue eyes. She is the combination of Naruto's sexy jutsu, Shadow clone and a little divine intervention. Can she handle the Ninja world?
If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If your obsessed with dragons, foxes, wolves and fantasy copy and paste this in your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile.
If you're addicted to anime,copy & paste this into your profile.
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile.
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly, Alleyanna Cullen, hugs.4.all.the.emo.boyz, WritingRocks6, Bubble Blower, panache2005, .Dr1v3n t0 1n5aN1Ty., Serenity.Jones, crystalshake, KOIZUMI MICHIYO, Rain C. frosty, Pikana,ShadowWolf 2.X,Ghost Rider Fan123, Darkvizardking69,Masteria,
REST IN PIECE TOONAMI.
From beginning to the very end I was there. I will never forget.
Tom and the Absolution
update!!!! TOM IS ALIVE!
A great Character and a funny host
You will live on forever in this.
If you were there for Toonami from the beginning to end and now wish to honor it post this on your profile.
Honorary Member of The Book of Log.
If you worship the holyness that is the log, copy and paste this section onto your profile... although you may want to change the comments
Position: Log Worshipper (since 11/12/2010)
Possible Book of Log Positons:
Log Worshipper: Beginning position. No requirements
Log Priest: You have created at least 1 Naruto related fanfic that frequently (every 2-4 chapers) praises the almighty log and actually fits into the story
Log Pope (there can be more than 1 pope... its safer that way): you have created 3 naruto related fanfics that frequently praise the almighty log
OR the Fanfic that already occasionally praises the log has at least 400 reviews
OR you create a (decently made) Naruto fanfic focused on praising the log... log forbid.
Excerpt of the log number 124: when using the log to escape a fire jutsu, it is konoha custom to write an apology letter to the log, and depending on rank of jutsu escaped from depicts how many words are needed. c-rank, two thousand, B-rank, one thousand five hundred, a-rank, one thousand. only S-rank and higher or excused from the writing of the letter. even then, it is still reccommended.
Log excerpt number 231: if konoha shinobi celebrate the holiday of Christmas, then it is required that they put gifts under the Christmas log. Use of a full tree is an insult to the log and if found out that shinobi is uneligible from using the log for a period of two months.
Log excerpt number 437: Use of the log in a situation that clearly could be avoided using a variety of other methods or techniques is looked down upon. In order to repent for such actions, the following steps should be taken:
For every dent caused by your replacement you shall plant one sapling.
For every stab wound caused by your replacement you shall plant five
For every hole in the log caused by your replacement you shall plant ten
For every detached piece of the log caused by your replacement you shall
For a destroyed and unusable log caused by your replacement you shall plant
If your log is defective you may call 1-800-BAD-LOGS to file a complaint. If
'and the willow sayeth unto the ninja: wherefore dost i weep? 'tis tears of joy, as thy kin and mine together fell thine foes, who would bring the axe and torch to the wood. the log ist thine ally, and mine kin. calling upon the log, is to call upon me. to aid thee in battle, i weep my tear of joy.
'as the log takes your place, you become the log. the log becomes you. for a moment, you are an extension of the logs blessing unto ninja.'
'you are fools! your log is but a mockery of the power of ninja!- the ninja from the desert declared. and the people shook their heads.
'and as the smoke cleared, his foe stared in awe at the log. blackened and charred, the log crumbled. the ninja, filled with righteous wrath, fell upon his foe and slew him. he made his way to the log, and wept. his companion, the log that had accompanied him through so many battles, was no more. he spoke thus to his fallen companion: though now you have fallen in battle, you rest where the logs forever grow. the forest of life called for you, and you answered its call, as you did mine. i thank you my friend.'
'he despaired, for in this place of stone and earth, there was no logs to be found. reaching out with all his might, he begged for a log in the forsaken wasteland. and he was answered, and saved by the log, in a place where there were none.
'the log took his place and fell, forever into the abyss. the people, hearing of this, railed against him, in such numbers he swore to never endanger another log again. for many years, he fought without the log, growing more and more weary with each passing day. finally, he came across a foe that was too strong for him. as his life was about to end, he felt a familiar pull, and found himself out of harms way, seeing a log in his place. his stunned foe was felled in his stupor, and he approached the log, he knew it, for it was the same that fell so long ago. he asked of the log: why did you endanger yourself for me again? have you not done enough for me? and the log spoke: it is my duty, and our bond. we exist to save the ninja, and they exist to save the trees. we both play a part, for which i am content.'
'And so thy troublesome fellow, who was pursued by horde of the cursed 'Fangirls', found thy self trapped. Thus thy fellow commited one of thy ultimate sins. Thy child replaced himself with thou holy Log. Thy log was then torn apart by the dreaded fangirls. In its dying moments the Log cursed the fellow who use him is thus manner. Thy fellow was forever cured to that of the 'duck-butt' hair. Thus the boy's family was cursed to have the cursed 'duck-butt' hairstyle for all eternity. All ways to be sneered upon by the other Log worshipers. Through this you be warned to never sacrifice thou holy log to rabid fangirls.'
-book of the log, The Lumber Jack Sins Chapter 3, verses 13-21
Let it be known that it is absolutely forbidden to willingly perform the technique known as "1000 years of death" on a log. It is also equally frowned upon for one to replace oneself with a holy log for the purpose of avoiding said technique. The punishment for such actions is at least 6 months of banishment from the use of the holy log.
From the Vampiric Council regarding Stephanie Meyer
From the Council Chambers of the Association of Vampiric Activities Worldwide
Regarding those of the Vampire race in the Cullen family and the now-former human Isabella Swan, with the following issues brought before Stephanie Meyer.
It has come to our attention that your creation's popularity among humans - particularly adolescent females - has been on the rise as of late. While we do respect those promoting our kind who achieve fame and glory, we nevertheless must hold you accountable for promoting several grievous misconceptions about our race.
Grievance the First: Lifestyle
It has been discovered through various interviews with readers and fans that you claim the following: Vampires do not sleep, breathe, or eat. Additionally, you state that Edward Cullen drinks animal blood to avoid biting humans. To begin, Vampires should generally sleep in a coffin containing the soil of their homeland. It is not a necessity, but it is highly recommended to preserve vitality. This is a fact that has been laid down since the time of our most ancient ancestor Ch'thon. The concept of not needing to breathe is foolish. Certainly the more powerful among us consider breathing a hobby, however a study of the Cullen family reveals that none of them are at such a level. The consumption of animal blood is something you are only partially correct on. It is common knowledge that nothing can surpass 100 percent genuine virgin blood in terms of performance enhancement. Animal blood works in emergencies, but fresh human blood - preferably virgin - is the status quo.
Furthermore, if our kind were to feed solely on animals with lower-quality blood, feedings would increase and it would cause potential instability in the planetary food chain and we could all very well end up extinct.
Grievance the Second: Method
Your portrayal of Edward Cullen in particular is a slight affront to our race. He is described using reference from the novels in the following way:
"Edward, like all Vampires in the Twilight series, possesses superhuman beauty, strength, speed, endurance, and agility. His scent and voice are enormously seductive, so much so that he occasionally sends Bella into a pliant daze entirely by accident."
Our abilities do vary, so thankfully the idea of Edward being a fast mover is not an affront to us. The rest of the description, however, we take exception to. While the idea of our race being a sexual one by nature is indeed true, Vampires are quite adept at restraint of libido. We remain unobtrusive as need dictates, and merely charming when appropriate. Methods of seduction are to be employed against humans only when a Vampire has reached a state of mental maturity. The idea that Edward - being so young mentally - practically radiates lust is ridiculous. If Isabella Swan is indeed swooning around one such as him, the cause is more than likely akin to a pungent smother than an aromatic caress.
A requested message from Proinsias Cassidy states that one need not "look like a total (expletive deleted) wanker t'get some (expletive deleted)." To express things more eloquently, we wish you would cease writing things in an apparent state of self-induced arousal.
Grievance the Third: Concerning Isabella Swan
As is most likely obvious by now, the brunt of our displeasure with you seems to focus on Edward Cullen. Also of concern to us is your handling of the human Isabella Swan. While member Seras Victoria points out that Vampires can indeed fall in love with humans, such likelihood seems to fade as the Vampire grows more accustomed to their lifestyle. The near-immediate conversion to a Vampiric state to further develop a relationship is permissible and indeed encouraged. Unfortunately in your story, it seems it takes most of the series before this happens.
By all rights, only a fresh Vampire would be so hesitant to turn the target of their affection to their kind, as they would still cling to humanity. You state that Edward has been alive since the early 1900's. He should have shed such a connection to Humanity by this time. Furthermore, Vampires are generally not driven to attempt suicide simply because of badly-handled romantic situations.
Grievance the Fourth: Concerning Power
Stated above, powers do vary within, and a Vampire's abilities may even change as they gain power and status.
Default Vampire powers are the following:
Note that some Vampires may not possess these abilities, and some may possess others. Edward's current lineup of abilities is largely satisfactory, although we must state that no human is immune to a Vampire's telepathy. The idea of 'injecting venom into the heart' to convert a human to a Vampire is nonsense. Drinking a humans blood first renders them weak, and if a human is severely drained by a Vampire, only then do they themselves become a Vampire.
Additionally, the concept of Vampires having such varied powers among their own kind for the reason you describe is largely ridiculous. Vampires gain and perfect powers as they mature. Please realize that the varied capabilities of the Volturi are primarily telepathic in basic nature, and that the elementalist abilities of the Egyptian Coven's member Benjamin is more akin to the misrepresented nature of the so-called 'ninjas' of "Naruto" rather than the true abilities of any Vampire.
Furthermore, the idea of Vampires sparkling in sunlight is seen by us as truly nothing more than a foolish plot device. The most powerful of us are merely annoyed by sunlight, while the vast majority would - as member Proinsias Cassidy describes - "go up like six tons of Symtex."
President Vlad Dracula would like to state that even if you were a virgin he would not drink from you, for it would only sully our race.
Member Proisias Cassidy's message has been removed due to generally inappropriate language.
Member Saya Otonashi commends you on including a character who wishes to become a Vampire, however she feels offended that such a character would change so swiftly and practically throw her character away when changing so.
Member Angelus advises that the next time Edward Cullen feels jilted in his love life, that he try to sort out the problem himself.
Member Louise de Pointe du Lac recalls his own experience in Human-Vampire relations and cannot help but wonder how Isabella might have fared if she had met Lestat.
Member Seras Victoria wishes she could sparkle in the sunlight too. She has been reprimanded.
-We must commend you on the concept of the Volturi, although we find their policies regarding knowledge of our kind and dislike of Vampire children to be largely pointless.
-In anticipation of potential backlash regarding oddities among our own race, we wish to settle the following disputes here and shortly. First, concerning the unique nature of Vampires in Saya Otonashi's place of residence, human experimentation has muddled our kind their. The Chiropteran and Cavalier race are genetic deviants. Secondly, Proinsias Cassidy has quietly informed us that he had his fangs filed into normal incisors so as to avoid unwanted attention among humans. Furthermore, Louise de Pointe du Lac has commented on a new Vampire's need to bite and drink from the one who created them. This is not a necessary act and it has been concluded that this is an act done by some to give a Vampire their first blood until they are strong enough to feed themselves.
-In reference to your typical styles of romance, we have made contact with huntress Selene concerning her escapades with the Lycanthrope race.
-We are aware that the Count currently living on Sesame st. as well as Count Chocula do not conform to the standards set by the Council, however their actions and lifestyle are acceptable as they are useful for drawing in children.
-It is the esteemed belief of this Council that in cinematic portrayals of our race, Bela Lugosi and Tom Cruise make far better Vampires than Robert Patterson.
Post-script: Should you happen to be in contact with the esteemed Mr. Richard O'Brien before we are, please remind him that Transylvania is not 'trans-sexual', and we have no record of 'sweet transvestites' living here. The tourists are becoming annoying.
Post the Council's letter in your profile if you completely agree with them. I know I do.
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