Mr. Nohbodee
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Joined 02-17-10, id: 2259753, Profile Updated: 08-18-13
Author has written 7 stories for Hetalia - Axis Powers, Homestuck, Assassin's Creed, and Adventure Time with Finn and Jake.

So I went and got myself a freakin' tumblr and I don't know what I'm doing. To see crappy art, read unedited fics and other stuff, find me zillywhointhewhatnow or flossyoself for all of my floss related updates.


I'll be working on my Homestuck fics once I get a grip on my Adventure Time one. I promise!

About my current works: I am writing a SHIT TON of fanfics for Homestuck right now (Also, I'm CRAZY OBSESSED WITH MARSHALL LEE/ GUMBALL. I CAN'T FREAKING HANDLE...) I like writing short and smutty Assassins Creed ones..

Here are the ideas I've got going: (Homestuck)

Elementary, My Dear Egbert: 10 seemingly unrelated people are gathered in a mysterious location. Event leads to event and somebody has blood on their hands. The main 4: John Egbert, a locally renowned pianist that dreams to work in film. Rose LaLonde: A well known author and women's rights activist. Jade Harley: An eccentric woman and host of the party. Dave Strider: A smooth trumpet player with a keen eye and a knack for detecting. 40s AU (Sexitimes with Davekat mostly.) Short multichap

[Name yet to be determined: Gamzee Makara is a local musician with an amazing stage presence and Tavros is his admirer from afar. Tavros has a blog where he posts updates about the budding musician and Gamzee decides to try to meet this admirer in real life. (Story still in the works. Wanted to write some PB&J) Contemporary AU potential multichap

Truth or Dare (Name still in the works): Terezi broke up with Karkat and Eridan thinks that the cancer needs a palate cleanser. Eridan brings Karkat to a party where a group begins a game of "sexy" truth or dare. Mostly DaveKat... Maybe KarSol? EriSol? I don't know. Short probably 2-3 shot

Chaste Days and Candied Knights: Karkat wants his knight in an unhealthy way. He's torn, though. If he were to pursue this relationship, he would be shunned. He must keep it secret. Medieval AU maybe multichap...

Evident: Sollux holds a key piece of evidence but refuses to give it up to hot shot detective, Dave Strider. Not without a price. AU Dectectivestuck Dave/Sol fairly short and super smutty

Of Robots and False Identities: Jake English, a bumbling spy, bumbles himself into Dirk Strider's convoluted robot project by pretending to be helplessly in love with the robotic engineer. Superspystuck AU Dirk/Jake multichap and smutty

Name: Asterisk Danger

Something about me: I am the sole proprietor of a millinery, I do not have a life, I'm putting on a musical, I like gay things, I am an actor, I consider myself an artist, and I spend waay too much time on my blasted computer. I fucking love it when people call me 'sir' or 'gent'

Things that I like (By category):

Music: Barenaked Ladies, Reel Big Fish, Mad Caddies, All Caps, The Hush Sound, The Parslemouths and Oingo Boingo.

Reads: The Night Circus is one of my all time favorites. I am a fan of almost all kinds of fiction and most autobiographies. I am a big fan of Christopher Moore and Jasper Fforde... I also enjoy the occasional children's book.

Shows: Doctor Who, The Catherine Tate Show, Gravity Falls, Adventure Time Psyche, Pokemon, Danny Phantom, Adventure Time, did I mention Adventure Time? My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and some others that don't really matter.

Movies: Moulin Rouge! My Neighbor Totoro, Pan's Labyrinth, Amelie, Juno, Goldwing, Tokyo Godfathers, Tank Girl, The Brothers Bloom, Into the Woods, The Avengers, Son of Rambow, the Greatest Movie Ever Sold and Exporting Raymond

People: Miss Monica, Hearts, Trev, Kitt, Chimneypants, Beloved, Mizu, Blaise, Ani, Shannondoah, Jelly Bean, Bazor

Other: I don't give a fuck about the Oxford Comma. I really freakin' love cows. I will never stop wearing this bowler hat.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Sin Has a Blonde Flavor by Aurora Leaf reviews
Roxas has a problem; he is being tormented by a redheaded Preta demon with a rather bizarre obsession, and Roxas just can't get rid of him! Axel just wants a taste... How do you deal with a demon that is obsessed Akuroku. IMPROVED. R&R
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 40 - Words: 282,124 - Reviews: 586 - Favs: 280 - Follows: 262 - Updated: 8/20/2015 - Published: 4/4/2010 - Axel, Roxas
Evolution'ry Process by leaky.oven reviews
"It was like I woke up last week and Old Shaun was back." - "So the first thing you do when faced with a beehive is step on it?" SxD, 1stPOV, SLASH
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 15,156 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 76 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 6/16/2014 - Published: 3/1/2011 - [Shaun H., Desmond M.] - Complete
Visions and Truths by chaosattractor reviews
Karkat has been trying to wish his best friend happy wriggling day for three days, but Sollux isn't answering any of his messages. On the fourth day, Sollux shows up unexpectedly at Karkat's hive claiming that everything has changed. Can Karkat figure out what his friend is going through before things get completely out of control?
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 51,123 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 124 - Updated: 1/26/2014 - Published: 9/15/2012 - Karkat V., Sollux C.
What More Is There? by AssessTheSituation reviews
"Mr. Stark, it's a pleasure." Slash. Tony/Loki
Thor - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 17 - Words: 77,959 - Reviews: 750 - Favs: 984 - Follows: 1,188 - Updated: 8/7/2013 - Published: 9/27/2011 - Loki
A Disney Catastrophe by homestuckie153 reviews
Dave is the day manager of Disney World's "Magic Kingdom" park. He hates his job, especially when things go wrong. So, when a crocodile is loose in the waters, Dave really has to try to get things in control. And if that wasn't enough, Karkat tells John about Dave's feelings for him. Be nice. This is my first try. Rated M for adult content in later chapters. John/Dave, Jake/Dirk.
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,686 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 7/1/2013 - Published: 6/28/2013 - John E., Dave S., Dirk S., Jake E.
Cool Cats by ultimateweaboo reviews
I'm not sure what this is, but take it. Take all the glorious smut. Human!Stuck. Take the smut I am presenting to you. Just take it all. No questions.
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 705 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Published: 11/17/2012 - Equius Z., Dave S. - Complete
Two People With Self Esteem Issues Fall in Love by loveofsound reviews
...but neither knows what to do about it, so they're both awkward, and the stoner seems to be the only one who knows how to conduct his love life.
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 17,819 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 7/16/2012 - Published: 1/31/2012 - Sollux C., Karkat V.
Under Any Circumstances by sockruse reviews
You do not, under any circumstances, fall in love with your best friend. This is what he had been telling himself, since those ridiculous thoughts had started stirring in his brain. So why, after everything he had put him through, did he "love" him?
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,303 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 125 - Updated: 6/17/2012 - Published: 1/7/2012 - Sollux C., Karkat V.
Speak No Evil by MasqueradeLover reviews
A silent Loki is banished to Midgard where Tony Stark decides to take him prisoner. Eventual Tony/Loki.
Thor - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 26,561 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 232 - Follows: 399 - Updated: 6/1/2012 - Published: 4/24/2012 - Loki
Timeless by cervocerus reviews
No matter what time Dave was in, he saw him. Davekat, some non-con. Written for S.S. DAVEKAT, Dave's Second POV
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,466 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/22/2012 - Dave S., Karkat V. - Complete
Highschool Daze by JohnKatlove reviews
Your name is John Egbert and the beeping of your alarm has come to be a sound that makes your stomach flip-flop.
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,334 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 5/11/2012 - Published: 4/29/2012 - John E., Dave S.
Manifest Absolut by Eshli reviews
Dirk comes to live with Jake on the island and things turn out far more better than he could have ever imagined. Literally.
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,754 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 13 - Published: 3/30/2012 - Dirk S., Jake E. - Complete
Altered Flight Pattern by Xazz reviews
Malik is Ezio's best friend and has had a crush on him since he can remember, though he never reciprocates. It sort of all goes out the window when Ezio's family from Syria visits and Malik meets Altair and all bets are off. -complete-
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 63,878 - Reviews: 197 - Favs: 320 - Follows: 174 - Updated: 1/5/2012 - Published: 3/1/2011 - Malik, Altaïr - Complete
Seven Minutes by pimptav reviews
Dirk and Jake get to have Seven minutes in heaven. Sexual Content
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,621 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 12 - Published: 1/4/2012 - Dirk S., Jake E. - Complete
All These Words Are Underlined by Melfice reviews
College AU. There is something about the guys that Shaun dates that sets Desmond's teeth on edge. Jealousy is a pretty good bet. ShaunxDesmond.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,537 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 258 - Follows: 6 - Published: 9/8/2011 - Desmond M., Shaun H. - Complete
Game Night by Anaki Starsong reviews
Dave, John, Karkat, and Sollux have been getting together for a while for college boy game nights. Will a drinking game help John bring Sollux out of his shell and settle something between Dave and Karkat?
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,785 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 169 - Follows: 23 - Published: 8/21/2011 - John E., Sollux C. - Complete
Show Me The Money by kurosora1984 reviews
Roxas always thought that love meant sex. Axel always thought that that sex meant girls. But when Axel finds himself falling hard for a male prostitute, he may very well lose everything for the one he loves. AkuRoku, Zemyx, cameos.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 37 - Words: 182,572 - Reviews: 1310 - Favs: 927 - Follows: 568 - Updated: 4/30/2011 - Published: 6/17/2008 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
Mamma, Mommy, Leonardo by heaven-angel-15 reviews
Ezio/Leo - Leonardo has always been very kind and motherly, especially to Ezio's young apprentices... and it's never turned Ezio on so much before. Fill for the ACKink!Meme.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,689 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 247 - Follows: 171 - Updated: 2/28/2011 - Published: 2/20/2011 - Ezio A., Leonardo da Vinci - Complete
Inter by smilebot reviews
For an anon in the AC kink meme !o! ShaunxDesmond: The first time is never the last time.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 642 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/27/2010 - Shaun H., Desmond M. - Complete
F cked on the Floor by M. Monster reviews
He should have caught on by the drink names; A little Dick'll Do, Kiss on the Lips, Foreplay on Neutral Ground, Kiss Me Slow, Screaming Multiple Orgasms on the Beach, Cock'n'Balls, Naked on the Bathroom Floor, and F*cked on the Floor. Desmond/Shaun, smut
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,824 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 176 - Follows: 19 - Published: 7/21/2010 - Desmond M., Shaun H. - Complete
Mystery Box by nefertani reviews
Ian receives a mysterious box...what or who could be inside it? WARNING! Contains graphic yaoi lemon and LouiexIan incest. R&R!
Gaia Online - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 567 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/9/2010 - Ian, Louie V.H. - Complete
Fever by Treewater reviews
A wounded Ezio goes to Leonardo's shop for some care to avoid raising suspicion amongst Venice's doctors. His wound isn't the only thing that's burning, though. LeoEzio EzioLeo Leo/Ezio Ezio/Leo
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 18,035 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 178 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 7/6/2010 - Published: 6/8/2010 - Ezio A., Leonardo da Vinci - Complete
Amphibious Love by HumbleMumblingBumble reviews
Folks say "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever." Sounds nice, but it's the second part that scares me "If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be." I just don't know if I can risk losing him. Roxas&Merman!Axel
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 60,914 - Reviews: 172 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 6/17/2010 - Published: 4/12/2010 - Axel, Roxas
NonSequitur by giannimartelli reviews
This is the genius who built this pezzo di merda. Leonardo solo action.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,573 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/30/2010 - Leonardo da Vinci, Ezio A. - Complete
Sex Therapist by The ShadowStrike reviews
This is a place where one can experience the pleasures of the flesh with one’s beloved. Shall I release you from your worries and pain...? Welcome to Bar Kain.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,698 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/10/2010
Frustration by skysedge reviews
Sebastian is a butler on the edge and in need of something on which to vent his frustrations. Luckily for him, Grell has no sense of timing. Sebastian/Grell. Slight Sebastian/Ciel if you squint
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,252 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 1/1/2010 - Published: 4/12/2009 - Sebastian M., Grell S. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Sweet Pea reviews
"I like Fionna. She's a mad awesome and can almost sort of kind of kick my butt a little bit." He chuckled, "And if I give up, then that's a failure and I'm not so okay with that. But I'm thinking I should maybe… check out my other options," their eyes meet again and there's another silence. Marshall Lee/Prince Gumball fluffy cuteness.
Adventure Time with Finn and Jake - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 16,518 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 137 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 3/20/2013 - Published: 2/21/2013 - Marshall Lee, Prince B. Gumball - Complete
Do the Windy Thing reviews
Your name is John Egbert and you tried to singlehandedly bring down a drug syndicate that was somehow linked to a series of brutal murders that were occurring in your town. You also happened to have super powers. Mostly John/Dave M for lovely lovely lemons
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Adventure - Chapters: 22 - Words: 33,733 - Reviews: 89 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 1/17/2013 - Published: 6/2/2012 - Dave S., John E. - Complete
Sappy Sentiments and 1,000 Miles reviews
Desmond asks Shaun to accompany him on a trip from Seattle to LA. Shaun finds himself itching to come out to his roommate and long time friend, but finds a trip of this nature to be inappropriate. Little does he know, Desmond has a secret he's dying to share as well. Short contemporary AU Shaun/Des
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,246 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 12/24/2012 - Published: 12/16/2012 - Shaun H., Desmond M.
Impulse reviews
Nepeta tries to get Karkat to enjoy Halloween by taking him out to a club. Once there, Karkat makes eyes with the wrong stranger and suddenly things are heading in a direction he wouldn't have expected. Well, that's what he gets for acting on impulse. 1st person Karkat Bottom!Dave x Karkat
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,214 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 14 - Published: 10/28/2012 - Karkat V., Dave S. - Complete
The Hero VS El Bribón Lujurioso reviews
A continuation of Alfred F. Jones- Superhero. The Hero must take on a new band of bad guys, The Bad Touch Trio! US/UK, Spamano Franada implied GerIta M for lemons and language
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 20,921 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 12/18/2011 - Published: 8/4/2011 - America, England/Britain
Alfred F Jones Superhero reviews
Alfred F. Jones, bumbling waiter at a diner downtown, has a secret… He is the soul protector of Buttsecks City from his arch nemesis, Jack Union. Full summary inside. Rated M for language and buttsecks US/UK lalala
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 17,766 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 8/4/2011 - Published: 7/19/2011 - America, England/Britain - Complete
Disaster reviews
A series of first-person one-shots starring Hetalia characters. Russia/Canada US/UK Spamano Oh, and it's lemon flavored. discontinued
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,216 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 7/24/2011 - Published: 6/6/2011 - Complete