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Joined 02-27-10, id: 2271679, Profile Updated: 12-06-12
Author has written 8 stories for Twilight, Vampire Diaries, Harry Potter, Death Note, and Ouran High School Host Club.

Everyoneknowsnoonesays

Kidcultswiredcouldstealitall

I’ll build it for you

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By Baker Street Station, I Sat Down and Wept by Deco reviews
Petunia Dursley has trouble: she's lost her family, she's going crazy, she can do magic (but not always), her suitors are a mixed bag (operative word) & people keep trying to take her children away from her. They should be very afraid. (Not only a) Double Severitus. WARNING: Not what you expected.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 139 - Words: 542,818 - Reviews: 3639 - Favs: 1,615 - Follows: 1,910 - Updated: 6/7 - Published: 1/1/2013 - Harry P., Severus S., Petunia D., Dudley D.
Down The Bunny Hole by Swamy reviews
There's something about her that reminds him of himself. She's a river of power twirled on itself for the sake of someone that discards her more easily and more often than she realizes [cover by alla-matta]
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 96,892 - Reviews: 739 - Favs: 273 - Follows: 376 - Updated: 5/8 - Published: 9/22/2013 - Stefan S., Bonnie B.
Anatheme by GeniusofFun reviews
The day the infamous 'Watari' retired and she took over, a dormant volcano erupted and twenty-five children were abducted. They say coincidences are the devil's way of remaining anonymous, but none of them are superstitious. Sequel!Enfer (sort of LxOC)
Death Note - Rated: T - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,860 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 104 - Updated: 5/5 - Published: 3/27 - Light Y., L, Misa A., OC
To the Beat of My Own Drum by Seito reviews
Fake Relationship AU. In which Tsuna can't believe the hottest guy on campus agreed to the crazy plan his friends devised to get him away from his 'ex' (who was really a stalker) and Reborn who has no idea what to make of Tsuna and his crazy friends or why he makes a good fake boyfriend (aside from his father's power.) OR the AU where Reborn is the (lonely) normal one.
Katekyo Hitman Reborn! - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,193 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 351 - Follows: 399 - Updated: 4/13 - Published: 3/9 - [Reborn, Tsuna/Tsunayoshi S.] Vongola 10th Generation
Dream Catcher by ObsidianPen reviews
Luna Lovegood had always been an exceptionally talented dreamer. So talented, in fact, that she sometimes stumbled upon the dreams of troubled souls who yearned for help in their nightmares... But Fate is fickle, and certainly doesn't see a distinction between 'good' and 'evil' when deciding which souls qualify as 'troubled'. {HIATUS}
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 10,170 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 4/9 - Published: 11/27/2016 - [Bellatrix L., Luna L.]
Mu Is Other People by TzviaAriella reviews
When Light arrives in a strange hotel room, a familiar-looking man is already there. If only Light could remember who he was, or how he arrived in this hotel in the first place... (Inspired by Sartre's "No Exit")
Death Note - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,191 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/2 - Light Y., L - Complete
Making Lemonade by Dayja reviews
Life has given Harry a lot of lemons: dead parents, a cupboard under the stairs, horrible clothes, Harry Hunting. The result should have been a downtrodden, sad little boy. It isn't.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 17,614 - Reviews: 167 - Favs: 762 - Follows: 830 - Updated: 2/17 - Published: 3/18/2015 - Harry P., Rubeus H., Petunia D., Dudley D. - Complete
As Portioned from a Whole by Cannibal Inc reviews
Or in which Voldemort raises Harry as his; in all facets. (Harrymort)
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 8 - Words: 7,897 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 595 - Follows: 703 - Updated: 2/15 - Published: 1/14/2014 - [Harry P., Voldemort]
Renegade Knights by Biana Delacroix reviews
In the city of New Orleans, Klaus holds complete control of the board, but the peace is disrupted by the girl he hoped to love and the brother he thought long dead. With terrible secrets of their own, Kol and Caroline enlist Klaus to help them fight an even bigger threat to their world, and Caroline finds that after all that's happened, she and Klaus may finally have their chance.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 114,434 - Reviews: 408 - Favs: 404 - Follows: 678 - Updated: 2/3 - Published: 1/21/2014 - [Caroline F., Klaus] Kol M.
to be the man who walked 1000 miles (to fall down at your door) by Tarafina reviews
After Bonnie sacrifices her life for his, a grieving Damon is offered the chance to save his favorite witch. Time travel. Thrown back to 2009, he has a fresh start ahead of him and only one goal; keep Bonnie Bennett safe and happy. Falling in love with her wasn't on the to-do list, but he was already half-way there, so why not finish?
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 37,579 - Reviews: 393 - Favs: 386 - Follows: 572 - Updated: 8/22/2016 - Published: 4/19/2015 - [Damon S., Bonnie B.] [Caroline F., Stefan S.]
Complications by Windseeker2305 reviews
Harry wants to live a solitary wizard's life away from politics, pointless wars, and people. He figures he can do that by going neutral. Only problem is he needs to convince Voldemort to leave him alone. And if that's not complicated enough, he's starting to find a certain someone irresistible. SLASH DM/HP
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 46,623 - Reviews: 337 - Favs: 860 - Follows: 1,353 - Updated: 8/19/2016 - Published: 5/4/2014 - [Harry P., Draco M.] Severus S., Voldemort
Fork It Over by Barrel of Monkeys reviews
Little vampire Harry, along with his Sire Demetri, are about to really shake things up in Forks. Oh the adventures Harry will have.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 30 - Words: 80,775 - Reviews: 1818 - Favs: 3,651 - Follows: 3,561 - Updated: 7/3/2016 - Published: 8/11/2011 - Harry P., Demetri - Complete
Honeymoon Night (Of the Living Dead) by ladyofthewoo reviews
[CONTAINS SPOILERS] Following the events from the ending of the 2016 movie, our heroes must face the swarm of zombies that have interrupted their wedding. A short story of Mr. and Mrs. Darcy's wedding night.
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies - Rated: T - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,388 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 194 - Follows: 60 - Published: 2/9/2016 - Complete
Do Over by Kyogre reviews
Naruto and Kurama accidentally end up in the past, on the day of Naruto's birth, and are forced to live their lives all over again. They make the best of it, to everyone else's extreme confusion. (Alive Minato and Kushina, humor.)
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 23,823 - Reviews: 1300 - Favs: 7,576 - Follows: 3,503 - Updated: 10/7/2014 - Published: 8/27/2014 - Naruto U., Minato N., Kyuubi/Kurama, Kushina U. - Complete
we build, then we break by but seriously reviews
AU: "You can try and rationalize it all you want, Caroline," Stefan says, wiping blood from his mouth, "but it still hurts, doesn't it?" In which a human Caroline realizes that maybe the animal attacks plaguing this quaint little town aren't really animal attacks after all. / ensemble cast
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 10,757 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 95 - Updated: 12/30/2013 - Published: 3/2/2013 - [Caroline F., Stefan S.] Bonnie B., Matt D.
we could be heroes by acronymed reviews
S4!AU. Kol and his bat and his crazy take a hostage and immediately regret it. Or, that time there was a road trip, faeries, snark, wendigos, ust, sirens and so much more. — Kol/Caroline. 3/12.
Vampire Diaries - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 16,265 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 179 - Follows: 196 - Updated: 8/7/2013 - Published: 1/28/2013 - Caroline F., Kol M.
The Involuntary Descent by SalvaVeritate reviews
Pride is a thick, woolen gag that covers their maliciously beautiful mouths.
Cruel Intentions - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 11 - Words: 34,647 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 11/4/2012 - Published: 4/29/2006
A Hug A Day Keeps The Werewolves Away by rhythm junkie reviews
Derek is a Free Hugger. Stiles does not want to be hugged thank you very much. This is AU Scott is not a wolf and neither have met Derek before and Laura is alive.
Teen Wolf - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 12,288 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 249 - Follows: 106 - Updated: 10/3/2012 - Published: 8/25/2012 - Derek H., Stiles - Complete
These Are All Things You Don't Understand by Novocain reviews
Prostitution and assassination and the way of the shinobi are for Kakashi, and firsts and lasts and middles will never involve those nimble hands or chapped lips stretching in a bright, happy smile against his hip. There is no other choice, Sandaime says.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 13 - Words: 40,504 - Reviews: 442 - Favs: 536 - Follows: 547 - Updated: 8/17/2010 - Published: 4/7/2008 - Kakashi H., Minato N.
Et Al by omens reviews
He doesn’t want to choose, but he will if he has to. .Tony/Cassie. Just slightly AU.
Skins - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 19,942 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 151 - Follows: 16 - Published: 3/26/2010 - Tony S., Cassie A. - Complete
Locker Room Therapy by Asuka Kureru reviews
SasuNaru. AU. He'd rather think about Sasuke punching him, kissing him. It's weird, but normal-weird. It's not waking up handcuffed to a lead pipe and being held down as a psycho with his father's face calls him 'my son' and carves up his cheeks.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,337 - Reviews: 154 - Favs: 838 - Follows: 86 - Published: 12/9/2008 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
The Demilitarized Zone by michelerene reviews
Itachi Uchiha has always had a sadistic streak when it came to his little brother. Now the perfect opportunity has presented itself and he just can’t let it go by. He does love him after all. SasuNaru
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 112,010 - Reviews: 2276 - Favs: 4,392 - Follows: 1,043 - Updated: 5/30/2008 - Published: 1/17/2008 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Voldie's Book Club by cheryl bites reviews
Voldemort is imprisoned and tortured. Harry visits him and gets off with him. Torture, swearing, sexual references. HPGW, RWDM, HPLV.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 9 - Words: 49,406 - Reviews: 150 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 5/1/2007 - Published: 3/14/2007 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Crème Brulée reviews
There are plenty of odd people that filter in and out of the Master of Death's bakery, but none quite as odd as the tiny, blonde, Japanese man-child who keeps saying that he loves him. Harry/Hunny
Crossover - Harry Potter & Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,013 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 299 - Follows: 399 - Updated: 5/24 - Published: 4/22 - Harry P., Hunny/Honey/Mitsukuni H.
Pomme d'Api reviews
When asked what makes his apple pies so delicious, Harry will smile and say it's all about the magic. It also helps to have a Shinigami guinea-pig to experiment on. Don't pay attention to the floating apple near your head. (In which the Master of Death owns a shop).
Crossover - Harry Potter & Death Note - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,120 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 486 - Follows: 662 - Updated: 5/9 - Published: 1/7 - Harry P., Light Y., L, Ryuk
Baby's Breath reviews
Jasper comes bearing a gift before the Cullens leave definitely – a gift available in just a few short months. Jaspella! New Moon AU! Lemon.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,349 - Reviews: 232 - Favs: 418 - Follows: 669 - Updated: 4/12 - Published: 7/15/2012 - [Bella, Jasper]
In Folds reviews
While her best friend is off being a werewolf and imprinting on vampire guys, Bella has to deal with the aftermath; which wouldn't be so bad if Jasper Hale-Whitlock-Cullen wasn't freaking stalking her. Twilight!AU Jasper/Bella
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,849 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 75 - Published: 4/12 - Bella, Jasper
Saturn Barz reviews
Harry's pet snake makes a new friend called Nagini and five-year-old Harry Potter meets a Tom Riddle who is a little lost after his escape from a journal. Meanwhile, Albus Dumbledore seriously considers retirement. TMR/HARRY GREY!HARRY (whatever that means).
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,311 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 108 - Published: 1/13 - Harry P., Voldemort, Tom R. Jr.
Love, Caroline reviews
On a beach somewhere, Caroline tries to unwind and fails as originals keep appearing to pester her. These are the postcards she never sends. (It's so fluffy I want to die! Klaroline!)
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,899 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 15 - Published: 1/10 - [Caroline F., Klaus] Rebekah, Kol M. - Complete
Dolce Vita reviews
Caroline owns an ice cream shop which seems to attract every supernatural creature she's ever encountered (and when Kol Mikaelson, back from the dead, asks her for a job - excuse me, what, pause, rewind). Season 7 AU! No pairings yet!
Vampire Diaries - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 17,135 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 130 - Updated: 1/6 - Published: 6/22/2016 - Caroline F., Klaus, Kol M.
Kerosene reviews
It's a first meeting, a talk in the school parking lot, a crush. And then you're digging up graves and your boyfriend, who is not your boyfriend, is a psychopath with sharp teeth. Jasper/Bella! Twilight AU!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,596 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 12/7/2015 - Published: 11/10/2014 - Bella, Jasper