Looking through my past reviews on other people's stories, please pardon my ignorance and stupidity if I reviewed and it sounded weird, I was a lot younger and wow I was a mess.
"Sometimes it is entirely nessicary to kill a fly with a sledge hammer."-(I will get who said this within the next few days)
"A nuclear war can ruin your entire day."-Unknown
Tinkerbell, no offense, is a COMPLETE brat in Return To Neverland.
Why is Cinderella a fairytale, I mean come on any idiot can lose a shoe! I LOSE MINE DAILY AND I LOSE BOTH!
My imagenary friend thinks I'm insane.
I was playing my video game and this guy was shooting at me with a rocket launcher and he shouted, "I'M UNARMED DON'T HURT ME!"
If you have ever zoned out for more than 2 hours while not sleeping, copy, paste this on your profile, and add your name to the list: Cheshire Cat and March Hare,
If you have ever copied and pasted something on your profile, copy and paste this on your profile.
95% of teenage girls love Edward Cullen and/or Jacob Black, if you are a member of the 5% that are not, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you think I'm insane, copy and paste this one your profile and add your name to the list: CutiePieWannabe, Imagenary Friend,
FRIENDS: Will confort you when the guy rejects you.
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you said it, copy this to your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this to your profile. (Bumblebee: My all time record, FIVE HOURS! XD)
If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile. (Bumblebee: More like freakign straight up WEIRD)
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetballs? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy (which I am) but I'm just random! If you're random (Or can be at times) and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
If you have ever pushed on a door that said 'Pull" or pulled the handle on a door that said 'Push', copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a solid wall, copy this to your profile.
If you hate obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile
If there are times when you just annoy people for the heck of it, copy this into your profile
If you have ever made plans for world domination, copy and paste here.
If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal (aka: Trix), put this in your profile!
If you and/or your best friend is insane, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
Too many kids and teenagers have smoked or tried marijuana. If you haven't, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Ninety-eight percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are against child abuse, you should copy this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy this into your profile.
If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be something they're not, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you don't do drugs and never will, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think cancer is awful, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you talk to yourself and aren't afraid to admit it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are against animal cruelty, copy and paste this into your profile.
Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.
If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!
If you're wearing pants right now, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you want to see the world someday, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.
EMBRACE THE WEIRDNESS! If you embrace the weirdness, then copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever crashed into a wall while you are NOT on a sugar high, copy onto profile.
If you have ever said something that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile!
1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
4. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
5. Sell Girl Scout cookies.
6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
14. One word: Flatulence!
15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
16. Do Tai Chi exercises.
17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"
19. Give religious tracts to each passenger.
20. Meow occasionally.
21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
22. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"
23. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
24. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.
25. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
28. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"
29. Leave a box between the doors.
30. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
31. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
32. Start a sing-along.
33. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"
34. Play the harmonica.
35. Shadow box.
36. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
37. Lean against the button panel.
38. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
39. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
40. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
41. Bring a chair along.
42. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
43. Blow spit bubbles.
44. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
45. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
46. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
47. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
48. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at the passengers.
49. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."
50. If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
51. Bring a water pistol. Soak everyone's shoes.
52. Start brushing off invisible bugs from your arms, screaming "Aaughh! Get them off!"
53. Challenge your neighbor to a "Tic-Tac-Toe" tournament.
54. Laugh hysterically for five seconds, stop, and glare at the other passengers like they are crazy.
55. Charge into the elevator dripping wet, holding a towel and wearing only a bath robe. Mutter something about how husbands/wives always come home early just when it's getting to the good part.
56. Make chalk drawings on the walls.
57. As the elevator is going up, jump violently up and down, shouting "Down! I said down, dammit!"
58. Crouch in one corner and growl menacingly at everyone who gets on.
59. Try to get a game of "Twister" going.
60. Wrinkle your nose and smell the air repeatedly. Sniff at your neighbor suspiciously, give a disgusted frown, and take a step away.
AGONY- not all pain is gain
DEFEAT- for every winner, there are dozens of losers … odds are you’re one of them
FAILURE- when your best just isn’t good enough
FUTILITY- You’ll always miss 100 of the shots you don’t take and, statistically speaking, 99 of the ones you do.
LOSING- If at first you don’t succeed, failure may be your style
MISTAKES- it could be that the purpose of your life is only to serve as a warning to others
PESSIMISM- Every dark cloud has a silver lining. But lightning kills thousands of people every year who are trying to find it
PROCRASTINATION- Hard work often pays off over time. But laziness always pays off now.
STUPIDITY- Quitters never win and winners never quit. But those who never win and never quit are idiots.
UNIQUE- Just because you are unique, doesn’t mean you are useful.
ADVERSITY- That which does not kill me, postpones the inevitable.
BLAME-The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.
CLUELESSNESS- There are no stupid questions, but there are a lot of inquisitive idiots.
DESPAIR- It’s always darkest just before it goes pitch black.
DREAMS- Dreams are like rainbows, only idiots chase them.
GIVE UP- At some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser.
HUMILIATION- The harder you try, the dumber you look.
SUCCESS- Success is a journey not a destination, so stop running.
LEADERS- Leaders are like eagles. We don’t have either of them here.
MOTIVATION-If a pretty picture and a cute saying are all it takes to motivate you, you probably have a very easy job. The kind robots will be doing soon.
OVERCONFIDENCE-Before you attempt to beat the odds, be sure you can survive the odds beating you.
POTENTIAL- Not everybody gets to be an astronaut when they grow up.
PROBLEMS- No matter how great your problems may seem now, remember, you’ve probably only seen the tip of them.
RISKS- If you never try anything new, you’ll miss out on many of life’s great disappointments.
VICTORY- Winners never fly higher than when they are bouncing up and down on the egos of those they defeated.
WINNERS- Because nothing says “you’re a loser” more than owning a motivational poster about being a winner.
WORTH- Just because you’re necessary doesn’t mean you are important.
Underachievement- The tallest piece of grass is the first to be cut by the lawnmower.
One I found on my video game:
(A picture of a guy in a jet that is on fire)
Courage: Is the knowledge of knowing when to eject
50 Fun Things To Do During An Exam
You should not attempt these things during an actual exam. The following is meant for entertainment purposes only.
1. Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say "oh geez, better get cracking" and do some gibberish work. Turn it in a few minutes early.
2. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"
3. If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the integral symbol.
4. Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril.
5. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm so sure you can hear me thinking. " Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
6. Bring cheerleaders.
7. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand any of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who are you? Where's the regular guy?"
8. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.
9. On the answer sheet (book, whatever) find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.
10. Bring pets.
11. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.
12. Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas. "If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every fifteen minutes.
13. Do the exam with crayons, paint, or fluorescent markers.
14. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.
15. Come down with a BAD case of Turet's Syndrome during the exam. Be as vulgar as possible.
16. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up! For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.
17. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.
18. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.
19. Walk into the exam with an entourage. Claim you are going to be taping your next video during the exam. Try to get the instructor to let them stay, be persuasive. Tell the instructor to expect a percentage of the profits if they are allowed to stay.
20. Every five minutes, stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.
21. Turn in the exam approximately 30 minutes into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.
22. Do the entire exam as if it was multiple choice and true/false. If it is a multiple choice exam, spell out interesting things (DCCAB. BABE. etc..)
23. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.
24. Get the exam. Twenty minutes into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "Forget this!" and walk out triumphantly.
25. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (i. e. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink)
26. Show up completely drunk. (Completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).
27. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"
28. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.
29. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 minutes, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.
30. Go to an exam for a class you have no clue about, where you know the class is very small, and the instructor would recognize you if you belonged. Claim that you have been to every lecture. Fight for your right to take the exam.
31. Upon receiving the exam, look it over, while laughing loudly, say "you don't really expect me to waste my time on this drivel? Days of our Lives is on!!"
32. Bring a water pistol with you.
33. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.
34. Start a brawl in the middle of the exam.
35. If the exam is math/science related, make up the longest proofs you could possibly think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.
36. Come in wearing a full knight's outfit, complete with sword and shield.
37. Bring a friend to give you a back massage the entire way through the exam. Insist this person is needed, because you have bad circulation.
38. Bring cheat sheets for another class (make sure this is obvious.. like history notes for a calculus exam.. otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."
39. When you walk in, complain about the heat.
40. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.
41. One word: Wrestlemania.
42. Bring balloons, blow them up, start throwing them around like they do before concerts start.
43. Try to get people in the room to do the wave.
44. Play frisbee with a friend at the other side of the room.
45. Bring one pencil with a very sharp point. Break the point off your paper. Sharpen the pencil. Repeat this process for one hour.
46. Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc.. sent to you every few minutes throughout the exam.
47. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.
48. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle.
49. Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If you are asked to stop, say "it helps me think." Bring a copy of the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find the section on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to use the phrase "Told you so".
50. Answer the exam with the "Top Ten Reasons Why Professor xxxx is a Terrible Teacher."
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.
Never forget a friend, especially those that owe you
You can’t have everything, where would you put it?
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you’ll be a mile from them, and you’ll have their shoes. -Jack Handy
If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished!
Keep smiling – it makes everyone wonder what you’re up to.
There’s always a light at the end of the tunnel…just hope it’s NOT a train!
Education is what you get from reading the small print. Experience is what you get from not reading it.
Money may not buy happiness, but it sure makes misery much easier to live with.
There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can’t.
Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
Money can’t buy happiness but it can certainly rent it for a couple of hours.
Love your enemies. It’ll make ‘em crazy.
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you’ll have trouble putting on your pants.
If love isn’t a game, then why are there so many players?
True love is like a pair of socks: you gotta have two and they’ve gotta match.
Marriage is an adventure, like going to war.
Love may be blind but jealousy has 20-20 vision.
Love is like water; we can fall in it. We can drown in it. And we can’t live with out it.
Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.
There’s a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can’t get away.
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