OhThatsWanky
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Joined 04-05-10, id: 2315926, Profile Updated: 02-24-13
Author has written 7 stories for Glee.

I’m a wordspinnin’, Brittana-shippin’, cocktail-sippin’ gay lady living in the lovely Pacific Northwest, USA. I’m also old (I prefer the term well seasoned, personally) but that just means I can buy beer whenever I want it.

I've accepted that I'm the slowest writer alive, so updates will usually be posted every Saturday.

Hit me up at oh-thats-wanky.tumblr.com for more immediate fic updates, author's notes, and whatever else pops into my fool head.

Reading Kunoichi? You might be interested in the Kunoichi DVD Extras page, which contains a growing list of commentary, answers to reader questions, supplementary material, and more.

2/24/2013 Update: I have not abandoned Kuno. For details, please see here: wtf's going on with Kuno?

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The Bar by Penelope Cross reviews
Two lesbians walk into a bar. One sitting in one corner, the other in another. Then... Well, you'll just have to read and see, I guess.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 13,380 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 98 - Updated: 3/14 - Published: 1/8/2012 - Santana L., Brittany P.
Freaking Super by LateInLifeTiburon reviews
AU. The comic books don't tell you everything. Like when to take the mask off, for example. Superhero!Santana, Brittana, Samcedes
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 16 - Words: 244,911 - Reviews: 989 - Favs: 932 - Follows: 1,572 - Updated: 2/26 - Published: 3/30/2012 - Santana L., Brittany P.
Coming Undone by Skillzyo reviews
AU. All Santana wants is some caffeine so she can push through an all-nighter and churn out an analysis of a book she didn't read. She gets more than she bargains for when she visits her neighbors to ask for a cup of coffee.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 46,292 - Reviews: 212 - Favs: 349 - Follows: 751 - Updated: 1/28 - Published: 3/3/2012 - Brittany P., Santana L.
I Need a Medic by Gorshenin reviews
AU. Army!Brittana. It's wrong on so many levels. It's fraternization, it's unprofessional, it could cost you your rank, your career, and worse-hers; but you can't stay away. You need her and it has nothing to do with the palpitations in your chest.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 20 - Words: 164,552 - Reviews: 1750 - Favs: 1,504 - Follows: 2,200 - Updated: 11/19/2013 - Published: 5/19/2012 - Santana L., Brittany P.
The Knife Thrower's Daughter by themostrandomfandom reviews
In the summer of 1898, Santana Lopez joined the J.P. Adams & Son Traveling Circus & Menagerie as it toured the states of the Upper American Midwest. She also fell in love with the knife thrower's daughter.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 476,070 - Reviews: 922 - Favs: 1,062 - Follows: 1,144 - Updated: 7/8/2013 - Published: 3/13/2012 - Santana L., Brittany P. - Complete
Set the World on Fire by Cora709 reviews
For six months Santana has been living in New York City with Kurt and Rachel, but now Brittany has received her diploma and is finally coming to join them. Can new relationships accommodate old ones? And can the past ever really be recaptured?
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 13 - Words: 259,793 - Reviews: 1054 - Favs: 1,305 - Follows: 1,264 - Updated: 2/7/2013 - Published: 1/30/2012 - Santana L., Brittany P. - Complete
White Shadows by Good Afternoon reviews
AU. 1862, the North has started the draft. Santana follows her father to war, intent on proving her worth as a doctor. Brittany enlists in place of her father, intent on keeping her family safe. In this broken land, they find a home in each other.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 26 - Words: 316,762 - Reviews: 1362 - Favs: 1,195 - Follows: 1,114 - Updated: 1/3/2013 - Published: 12/8/2011 - Santana L., Brittany P. - Complete
I'll Teach You to Dance by monochromeheartbeat reviews
Three years after graduation, Santana Lopez and her roommates, Quinn Fabray and Rachel Berry, attend a dance class in NYC. Follows most of the events in Glee if Brittany had never gone to WMHS.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 43 - Words: 386,127 - Reviews: 2564 - Favs: 2,446 - Follows: 3,048 - Updated: 12/25/2012 - Published: 2/21/2012 - Brittany P., Santana L.
Lost & Found by BlackShield reviews
My father had given me a book with instructions to find you: your name and energy signature, and your last known whereabouts. He had an old photograph of you from your parents. As I had waited for you, I had filled the blank pages with my hopes for us. I took the book and a ship and left my life behind.
Runaways - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,525 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/26/2012 - Xavin, Karolina D./Lucy in the Sky - Complete
The Curse of Sea And Land by Kairos27 reviews
AU, 1697-1710. The record of how an orphaned girl named Santana fell in love with the sea and became the feared Spanish privateer, the Accursed Santiago López y Viguera.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 26,323 - Reviews: 148 - Favs: 184 - Follows: 160 - Updated: 7/16/2012 - Published: 7/10/2011 - Santana L., Brittany P. - Complete
The Blue Lagoon by letsgetdizzy reviews
A retelling of the blue lagoon. Santana and Brittany are marooned on an island for years and struggle to readjust to society after their rescue.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 116,989 - Reviews: 280 - Favs: 219 - Follows: 364 - Updated: 7/10/2012 - Published: 7/20/2011 - Santana L., Brittany P.
Assembly Required by BlackShield reviews
Brittana as Avengers: Just when Santana's about to swoon against the wall from the look of those eyes, Brittany Pierce, the Iron Maiden, actually winks at her. Twoshot, complete..
Glee - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 25,508 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 158 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 6/5/2012 - Published: 5/30/2012 - Santana L., Brittany P. - Complete
Avalanche by Lumos-Nox-Obliviate reviews
Brittana fanfic. Set at the beginning of season 3. Santana POV coming to terms with herself and concreting her relationship with Brittany. Enjoy!
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 24 - Words: 145,220 - Reviews: 260 - Favs: 353 - Follows: 414 - Updated: 5/6/2012 - Published: 12/15/2011 - Brittany P., Santana L.
Brittany & LT by BlackShield reviews
Reinterpretation of Calvin & Hobbes, with Britt as Calvin, Santana as Susie, and the honorable Lord Tubbington as Hobbes.
Glee - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 9,688 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 3/31/2012 - Published: 3/25/2012 - Brittany P., Santana L. - Complete
Tomato, Tomotta by BlackShield reviews
It wasn't like they could tell at first sight or anything. Sugar from the Future: the story behind her time travel, through her parents' eyes.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,382 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 3/22/2012 - Published: 12/10/2011 - Brittany P., Santana L. - Complete
Ice by BlackShield reviews
She realizes she's only ever had two ICE contacts, and he's never been one of them. Santana visits Dave in the hospital during 3x14. Santofsky friendship, side Brittana. T for themes and trigger warning for canon attempted suicide.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 4 - Words: 17,486 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 2/26/2012 - Published: 2/21/2012 - Santana L., D. Karofsky - Complete
Pas de Deux by la rose carnation reviews
Companion piece to "The Only True Paradises." The evolution of Santana and Brittany's relationship from Brittany's perspective.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 20 - Words: 56,344 - Reviews: 241 - Favs: 591 - Follows: 252 - Updated: 9/20/2011 - Published: 4/23/2011 - Brittany P., Santana L. - Complete
The Only True Paradises by la rose carnation reviews
The tortuous evolution of Santana's feelings toward Brittany. See also "Pas de Deux," a companion piece from Brittany's point of view.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 20 - Words: 47,671 - Reviews: 225 - Favs: 679 - Follows: 304 - Updated: 9/20/2011 - Published: 4/5/2011 - Santana L., Brittany P. - Complete
Lake Hope by Cora709 reviews
On the last weekend of summer, Brittany convinces Santana to come camping with her. For both bad reasons and good, it's a trip neither of them will ever forget.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 8 - Words: 58,716 - Reviews: 457 - Favs: 1,056 - Follows: 456 - Updated: 7/14/2011 - Published: 6/8/2011 - Santana L., Brittany P. - Complete
Life That Moves by Kairos27 reviews
It took several years overseas and a roadside bomb to get to this point, but Santana Lopez finally understands it a little better.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 686 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/4/2011 - Santana L., Brittany P. - Complete
Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner by killer cereal reviews
"Brittany and Santana aren't allowed within fifty yards of each other, and when in school and there's no choice but for them to be in the same room they have to have bodyguards." "But why?"
Glee - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 15,877 - Reviews: 249 - Favs: 449 - Follows: 166 - Updated: 1/16/2011 - Published: 12/24/2010 - Brittany P., Santana L. - Complete
Exitus by sinvraal reviews
Explorations, variations and off-camera moments from the Mass Effect 2 storyline. Multiple character POVs.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 31 - Words: 121,954 - Reviews: 494 - Favs: 256 - Follows: 129 - Updated: 10/4/2010 - Published: 3/12/2010 - Complete
Synthetic Insight by Pruit Igoe reviews
What if the line between artificial intelligence and organic intelligence was crossed? Commander Shepard gains a power beyond any organic being, and comes to understand the war that she fights. AU, FSHEP
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 33,689 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 118 - Updated: 8/9/2010 - Published: 4/21/2010 - Shepard (F)
Mass Mayhem by Universitas reviews
100 drabbles in 20 weeks exploring Victor Shepard and his crew. Week 20: Both of them are determined to finish the mission. And both of them are determined to come out on the other side. Together. *M!Shepard/Joker*
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 20 - Words: 15,384 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 6/20/2010 - Published: 2/16/2010 - Shepard (M), Joker - Complete
Hearts and Minds by R-I-C-A-R-D reviews
A loosely connected series of scenes exploring the relationships between Commander Shepard and her Cerberus 'allies' from varying perspectives.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 14 - Words: 40,682 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 6/18/2010 - Published: 2/20/2010 - Shepard (F) - Complete
Ministrations by FLECHER reviews
After two days without a word, the rest of the crew turn to the only one allowed up to the Commander's cabin, to see what staggering force put the soldier out of action. Oneshot - Shepard/Samara - fluffy
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,689 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/23/2010 - Shepard (F), Samara - Complete
A Capella by Ragtime Mouse reviews
Tali gets an unusual request from an equally unusual shipmate. Tali/Legion. Pure, unadulterated fluff on a fluff sandwich. T for Jack's potty mouth.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,652 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 21 - Published: 4/22/2010 - Tali'Zorah, Legion
Holding On to Let Go by Kane Lam reviews
Shepard and Liara romance: Falling in love means carrying shared burdens, for better or worse. One is freed from the past and another introduced to the means of a darker future. Violence and language. Please review!
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 47,059 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 4/19/2010 - Published: 3/29/2010 - Shepard (F), Liara T'Soni - Complete
Iunctio by sinvraal reviews
Explorations, variations and off-camera moments from the main storyline. Shenko, multiple character POVs.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 25 - Words: 61,185 - Reviews: 239 - Favs: 312 - Follows: 72 - Updated: 7/29/2008 - Published: 4/22/2008 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Triptych reviews
In which Santana tries to adjust to a life without Brittany. S4 angst. A rare descent into writing canon.
Glee - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,342 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Published: 2/24/2013 - Brittany P., Santana L. - Complete
Kunoichi reviews
Britt is a shinobi, a perfect killer, trained to feel nothing and let nothing get in her way. But when a job goes wrong and propels Santana Lopez into her path, all of the training in the world can't stop the collision between the darkness of the only life Britt's ever known and a life in the light with Santana. AU!Brittana.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Crime - Chapters: 8 - Words: 37,807 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 321 - Updated: 8/27/2012 - Published: 5/5/2012 - Brittany P., Santana L.
Unearthed reviews
In which paleontologist Santana names a dinosaur after Brittany. AU!Brittana fluff.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,730 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 7/21/2012 - Published: 6/23/2012 - Santana L., Brittany P.
Bracing reviews
In which Santana is mortified by the prospect of getting braces as an adult - until she ends up in Dr. Pierce's office. AU!Brittana fluff. One shot. COMPLETE.
Glee - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,958 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 16 - Published: 6/16/2012 - Santana L., Brittany P. - Complete
144 reviews
144 microfics & sketches. Canon, past, future, AU. Spoilers up to the end of S3.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,453 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 15 - Published: 5/26/2012 - Brittany P., Santana L.
Keeping Time reviews
When Santana Lopez fires her drummer a week before her tour, a favor lands her big-time studio drummer Brittany Pierce as a last second fill-in. All Santana wants is someone who'll shut up and keep time. But with Brittany, she'll get a lot more than that. AU!Brittana.
Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,334 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 165 - Updated: 5/19/2012 - Published: 4/18/2012 - Brittany P., Santana L.
Gears reviews
In which Brittany gets her motocross on, among other things. A series of short pieces.
Glee - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,943 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 4/28/2012 - Published: 4/20/2012 - Brittany P., Santana L.