lostsouloftheunderworld
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Joined 04-06-10, id: 2316548, Profile Updated: 03-11-13
Author has written 5 stories for Lord of the Rings, The Tomorrow series, Harry Potter, and Star Trek: 2009.

My Email Adress:

lostsouloftheunderworld@hotmail.com

IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey guys, you can find me also on LiveJournal under the username miss_slasher. I will probably eventually close this account and move there as the guys who run fanfiction are being meanie poos and taking down people's stories.

Hi guys!

name: Kaite

gender: im a chick dudes!

job: being insane and writting fan ficts=)

location: computer desk.

Personality: Totally insane

Couldn't live without...SPELL CHECK-i seriously can't spell! in yr 6 i spelt Papua New Guinea, P-a-p-a-n-e-w-g-i-n-i!

Haven't written many of my own storries yet but am co-writting Grytherin with my coz FaelwenofLothlorien.(Roza)

Oath to the Review Revolution

I, Lostsouloftheunderworld, do solemnly swear to review all the fics I enjoy, regardless of the number of reviews, its’ age, or anything else.

I have joined the review revolution, post this in your profile and join the revolution

you have been Pinned
with Obsessive Cullen
Disorder put this on
profile if you've caught it!

(\)_(/)
(='.'=) This is Bunny.
(")_(") Copy and paste Bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination

l、
(゚、 。 7
l、 ヽ
じしf,)ノ


Yaaaay kitty!

This is Kitty. Copy and paste Kitty into your
signature to help him gain world domination

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different which is the same as uniquie, so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you laugh at the stupidest things, copy and past this into your profile.

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are against racism COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE. The only race is humanity

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get like two reviews, copy this into your profile.

If you wish that fictional characters were real, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are addicted to Fan-Fiction, copy this.

If you are in lala land most of the time copy this onto your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin, The Komodo Dragon Phoenix, Empress Caroline of Tamaran, monkyluvr, Darth KenObi-Wan, JediWolfMaster,EwanLuvr4Ever, xXJedi Knight BlazeXx, JaneVolturi, LOSTSOULOFTHEUNDERWORLD

A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're." If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile

92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing your butt off

If you think that over 70 percent of the American population doesn't give a flip about responsibility and it drives you INSANE, copy this into your profile

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever felt like something was watching you and then turned around to find nothing, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile

If you want to see the world someday, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you post this on profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could have clearly dodged, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

Raise awareness for global warming! If you think that we need to act quickly to stop global warming, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think cancer is awful, put this in your profile.

If you've ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever done homework, were reading a story on fanfiction, were writing a story for fanfiction, were talking to a friend, and were watching TV at the same time, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone their not, copy and paste this into your profile

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around and stood up.

He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism

If you don't think that everything Oprah says is true and you don't watch her religously then copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list. Softkit, LostBluePhantom, Jedi X-Man Serena Kenobi, darksidesparkles, Earthwhisper, xXJedi Knight BlazeXx, JaneVolturi, LOSTSOULOFTHEUNDERWORLD

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think it's stupid that girls are associated with the color pink, copy and paste this into your profile.

if you have ever annoyed people just for fun copy this to your profile

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that says pull (or vice versa) copy and paste this into your profile.

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If your in love with a fictional character copy and paste this is you profile

If when your friends/family tell you that Lord of the Rings isn't real and you spazz out copy and paste

Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts:

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office.

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar.

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination.

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after me lucky charms."

8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month."

10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand.

11) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force."

12) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."

13) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.

14) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.

15) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.

16) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.

17) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day."

18) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.

19) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor.

20) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort.

21) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy.

22) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.

23) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate.

24) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.

25) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core."

26) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

27) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.

28) I do not weigh the same as a Duck.

29) I will not lick Trevor.

30) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween.

31) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously.

32) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.

33) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet.

34) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice.

35) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God.

36) But yes, I will do it all anyway.

If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever walked into a clear glass door by accident and fell back, copy this onto your profile

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica, twilightgirl1918, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Pirates OWNS you, Cripsee, I'll have some stupid cliche, danceswithwings119, gottaluvtwilight, gemini169, FreakyVampireChick, MidnightsMagic, u-know-u-love-me-kea, Madaline-Cullen,twilightzebraz, Amarwen, LOSTSOULOFTHEUNDERWORLD

If you have ever acidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil, copy and paste this into your profile.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

Ways to Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso .

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write For Smuggling Diamonds"

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Don't use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives,They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner."Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity...Copy and Paste this into your profile!!

No I do not have kids nor am i an adult. Oldness, ew. i had to post it, it told me 2!

Annoying things to do in an elevator

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag,
peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in
there?"

2) STAND silent and motionless in the
corner facing the wall without getting off.

3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt
and strain to yank the doors open, then
act as if you're embarrassed when they
open themselves.

4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake
and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5) MEOW occasionally.

6) STARE At another passenger for a
while. Then announce in horror: "You're
one of THEM" - and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And
push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone
presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger
for a while, then announce: "I have new
socks on."

11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look
around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"

12) TRY to make personal calls on the
emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor
with chalk and announce to the other
passengers: "This is my personal space."

14) WHEN there's only one other person
in the elevator, tap them on the
shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they
give you a shock. Smile, and go back for
more.

16) ASK if you can push the button for
other people but push the wrong ones.

17) HOLD the doors open and say you're
waiting for your friend. After a while,
let the doors close and say "Hi Greg,
How's your day been?"

18) DROP a pen and wait until someone
reaches to help pick it up, then scream:
"That's mine!"

19) BRING a camera and take pictures of
everyone in the lift.

20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant
and review emergency procedures and
exits with the Passengers.

21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.

22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it

If you've ever imagined yourself killing off a fictional character so that you could steal her fictional boyfriend, copy this into your profile.

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile

If you have ever stayed up for over 40 hours continuously just because you frickin' could, copy this into your profile

If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and past this into your profile.

If you think I am an absolute obsessed geek because I have the above, copy this and the above into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy and paste this into your profile if you are one of the few people who would answer "where to begin?"

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and Baa Baa Black Sheep had the same tune.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels.

If You like chocolate as much as I do, copy this into your profile.

If you almost always have a song stuck in your head, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have read the Twilight book so much, that the cover came of so you had to duck tape it together, copy and paste this on your profile

Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you're part of the 8 percent that hasn't, put this in your profile.

If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy this to your profile

98 percent of the population has a myspace. If you're one of the 2 percent that isn't an emo , copy and paste this in your profile

If keyboards hate you copy and paste this into your profile! (Especially the FREAKING CAPS LOCK!!)

If you have more than one of most of the copy and past its, copy and past this

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If they are right...copy and paste this into your profile

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If u think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in ur profile!

If you horrible at taking direction... copy and paste to your profile...

If you've reread TWILIGHT over four times...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've had at least two friends move away from you...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

if there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile

if you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile! (wooooo!)

If you like Sharpies, penguins, cookies, close friends, MSN, AIM, and/or the internet, copy this to your profile.

If yoo cant spel too sav yoor lyfe then putt thes in yoor profiel.

Instead of doing it yourself, you like to copy. If that describes you, paste this into your profile.

1. Grab the book nearest to you, and go to page 111, Paragraph 6. What is it?

talking about entertainment in ancient rome(History txt book!)

"2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can, What can you touch?

chest of draws

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?

AVATAR!! just got it on DVD!!

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:

2:50PM

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?

2:36PM...well i wasn't too far off!

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

my T.V. playing Avatar

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?

last night to feed the dogs

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?

girl of the moment's profile

9. What are you wearing?

slippers, jeans, hooded T-shirt, dressing gown and undies! leave me alone! I sick!! =(

10. Did you dream last night?

haha yeah...

11. When did you last laugh?

When answering the above question

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?

A Black Ducati 1100 Mulitistrada!

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:

I'm one of the top 40 singers in my state! But have currentl lost my voice! =(

18. If you could change two things about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?

I would eradicate poverty and war

19. Do you like to dance?

no!! I have 2 left feet!!

20. George Bush:

The stupid idiot who used to be in charge of America!

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?

Ashley.

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?

Damian

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?

I love traveling, don't get me wrong, but I'd prefer to stay here!

1. Which book from the series was your favorite? Why?

Well i really liked the last Olympian... it was really good and i loved all the percabeth. But my favorite would have to be the battle of the labyrinth.

2. Which Olympian god/goddess is your favorite? Least favorite?
I LOVE APOLLO! has me stiches all the time! HATE HATE HATE Ares!!

I love Artemis and HATE Hera.

3. Which half-blood/mortal in the series is your favorite? Least favorite?

Rachel. I don't no why, i just don't!

This or That

Percabeth (Percy and Annabeth) or Lukabeth (Luke and Annabeth)?
Percabeth! Dugh!

Annabeth or Rachel?
Annabeth :D

Thalia or Luke?
Thalia! LUKE IS EVIL!!

Riptide or Backbiter?

as much as i love percy. BACKBITER!! its so much cooler them riptide. it can kill anyone!! (haha i'm not a physco. i swear!!)

Wisdom or the Sea?

Wisdom! i need it!!

"Wouldn't life me amazing if sweat pants were sexy, Mondays were fun, junk food didn't make you feel fat, girls didn't cause so much drama, boys weren't confusing and goodbyes were only till tomorrow?"

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you are a nerd and proud of it, put this in your profile

"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you!!"

Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27, 2006, because it was "too small" and "off its orbit" for some scientists' likings. If you think Pluto should still be a planet, copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO!!

IMPORTANT- Teenage girls who are NOT in love with Edward Cullen/ Robert Pattison are fast becoming an endangered species. If you are part of this endangered species, copy and paste this in your profile. Quick, we need sponsers! :D:D:D:D:D

Your Guy Side!

You love hoodies.yes
You love jeans.
yes
Dogs are better than cats.
yes
Its hilarious when people get hurt. yes
Youve played with/against boys on a team. yes
Shopping is torture. (in what mixed up world could shopping ever be torture?)
Sad movies suck.
no
You own/ed an XBox.
no
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid. yes
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
no
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega. yes
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers. no
You watch sports on TV.
no
Gory movies are cool. yes
You go to your dad for advice. no
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
no
You like going to high school football games. no
You used to/do collect baseball/football cards. yes-only cause my pop gave them 2 me! i detest football!
Baggy pants are cool to wear. no
Its kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
(No way. The more the better!!)
Green, black, blue, red, or silver are one of your favorite colors. yes
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
yes
Sports are fun.
yes
Talk with food in your mouth.
yes
Sleep with your socks on at night. no

TOTAL: 12

YOUR GIRL SIDE

xYou wear lip gloss/chapstick. (I am a lipgloss addict
xYou love to shop.
(YES!!)
xYou wear eyeline.
yes
xYou wear the color pink. No! I detest PINK!
xGo to your mom for advice. yes
xYou considder cheerleading a sport. no
xYou hate wearing the color black. no
xYou like hanging out at the mall.
yes
xYou like getting manicures and/or pedicures. no
xYou like wearing jewelry.
yup
xSkirts are a big part of your wardrobe. no
xShopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
yes
xYou dont like the movie Star Wars.no
xYou were in gymnastics/dance. no
xIt takes you around/more than one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up. no
xYou smile alot more than you should. no
xYou have more than 10 pairs of shoes.yes
xYou care about what you look like. no
xYou like wearing dresses when you can. yup
xYou like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.yup.
xYou love the movies. yup
xUsed to play with dolls as a little kd. yes
xLike putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.no
xLike being he star of everything.yes

TOTAL:13

Love you enemies. it pisses them off"

"Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over."

The diffrence between "Friend" and "Best friend"

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will prank call him and whisper, " You will die in seven days..."

A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much?"

A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

When I get married she'll be the maid of honer,

When i have a baby, she'll be the godmother,

And when were old, she'll be sitting with me in the nursing home,having wheelchair races

She's more then my best friend. She's my other half

(Luv ya BabyBells!)

Girls are like apples in a tree.

All the sweet, nice ones are at the top.

But, boys don't want to reach for the good ones

because they're afraid of falling and getting hurt.

Instead, they just get the rotten apples

from the ground that aren't as good, but easy.

So the apples at the top think

"Is there something wrong with me?"

But, in reality, they're all amazing.

They just have to wait

for the right boy to come along,

the one who's brave enough,

to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

REPOST THIS TO LET ALL THE SWEET APPLES KNOW THAT THERE ISN'T SOMETHING WRONG WITH THEM!

Female Comebacks

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing

This is one of those things where ya put your ipod on shuffle and then answer questions with the songs. No cheating!!

If someone says "Is this ok?" you say?

Unwind-Pink

How would you describe yourself?

With Love- Hilary Duff

What do you like in a guy?

I Begin To Wonder- Danni Minogue

How are you feeling?

Candy Coloured Lights- Rogue Traders

What's your life's purpose?

Slow Down Baby- Christina Aguilera

What is your motto?

I Don't Wanna Wait- The Veronicas

What do your friends think of you?

Light Years- wes Carr

What do you think of your parents?

In The Summer Time- Thirsty Merc

What do you think about a lot?

Dimming of The Day-The Corrs

What's 22?

Mambo No.5- Lou Bega

What do you think of your best friend?

Take My Breath Away-Jessica Simpson

What do you think of the person you like?

The Driveway- Miley Cirus

What's your life story?

Shake It- Metro Station

What do you want to be when you grow up?

Get The Party Started-Pink

What do you think when you see the person you like?

Voodoo Child- Rogue Traders

What will they play at your wedding?

Throw Your Arms Around Me- Rogue Traders

What will they play at your funeral?

Way To Go- Rogue Traders

What's your hooby?

Flightless Bird, American Mouth- Iron and Wine

What's your biggest fear?

I Ran (So Far Away)- Bowling for Soup

What's your biggest secret?

The Take Over, The Breaks Over- Fall Out Boy

What do you think of your friends?

Love Is An Animal- Was Carr

What will you post this as?

Please Don't Leave Me- Pink

What is the first thing you say in the morning?

Take Me To The Clouds Above-LMC vs U2

Your teacher is...

Friends Like You- Bowling For Soup

If you ever got a tatoo what would it say?

Vanilla Twiligh-Owl City(Beautiful, but i'm never gettin a Tat)

How would you describe you next door neaighbors?

If You Come Back To Me/Outro- Bowling For Soup

What's on your beside table right now?

Along With The Girls- The Corrs

What did you do when you woke up this morning?

Epiphany-Bowling For Soup

When you open your wodrobe what do you see?

In Love Again- Rogue Traders

If you had to write a fanfic now what would it be called?

Bella's Lulaby- Carter Burwell- Twilight obiously!

Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts: part2

1) I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss

2) Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda

3) I will not give Hagrid Pokémon cards and convince him they're real animals

4) I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin quidditch matches

5) When Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Batmoblie, Robin!"

6) Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is simply coincidental

7) I will not refer to the Weasley Twins as "bookends"

8) I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my Calculus book.

9) I will not hold my wand in the air before I casting spells shouting "I got the power!"

10) I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs.

11) I will not slip Malfoy a Love Potion in his morning goblet of Pumpkin Juice.

12) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.

13) I will not call Dumbledore "Santa Claus!" during the Christmas Holidays.

14) I will not put Muggle fairy book in the History section at the library.

15) I will not send Snape a bottle of shampoo for Christmas.

16) I am not allowed to tell Hufflepuffs there is no Santa Clause.

17) I am not allowed to refer to myself as the New Dark Lord.

18) I am not allowed to sneak into Professor Snapes private chambers to watch him sing I Will Survive in the mirror, as it is disturbing.

19) I am not allowed to steal Professor Flitwicks wand, hold it over my head and laugh as he tries to reach it.

20)I will not replace Madam Pomfrey's Skele-Gro with pumpkin juice.

21) I will not replace Professor Snape's pumpkin juice with Skele-Gro.

22) I will not impersonate the Swedish Chef in Potions class.

23) The next time that I see Rita Skeeter, I am not to threaten her with a can of Raid.

24.) I will not subvert the lock on the fourth-floor girls' bathroom and sell its location to first-years as "The Chamber of Secrets".

25) When applying for a post at the Ministry of Magic after graduation, I should not cite "Fred and George Weasley" as my greatest influence at Hogwarts.

26) Putting down "Lord Voldemort" is probably not best either.

27) A Muggle "vacuum cleaner" is not acceptable Quidditch equipment, even if it has been enchanted to fly.

28) Hogsmeade village is not "a wretched hive of scum and villainy. “

29) I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I prophesied her death.

30) I will also not tell Professor Trelawney that I had a vision of her killing the Dark Lord.

40.) Sending rings to the nine senior faculty at Yuletide, with the return address "Voldemort", is not funny.

41) Insisting that the school acquire computers and network the buildings is a pointless request as they claim that a quill and parchment is sufficient.

42) Calling the Ghostbusters is a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists.

43) I may not have a private army.

44) I must not substitute chocolate-flavoured laxative for Professor Lupin's prescription-strength chocolate.

45) Nor am I to in any way substitute, alter, hide, or otherwise tamper with Professor Dumbledore's candy.

46) I am not the wicked witch of the west.

47) -I will not refer to Professor Umbridge as such either.

48) I will not melt if water is poured over me.

49) -Neither will Professor Umbridge.

50) I shouldn't use Photoshop to create incriminating photos of my house prefects or tutors.

51) I will not enchant the Golden Snitch to fly up the nearest fan's nose.

52) I do not know the Avada Kedavra curse, and pretending I do to people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover.

53) I will not test my Potions assigments by spiking Snape's drink with them.

54) - Especially not all of them at once.

55) I will not try to hock off my old piercings as "priceless Muggle artifacts."

56) I will not claim my X-Files tapes are "Auror Training Videos."

57) Professor Snape definitely does not have pointed ears, and under no circumstances is he to be addressed as 'Spock'.

58) I am not able to see the Grim Reaper, nor am I to claim that he is standing by the Headmaster, tapping an hourglass and looking at him impatiently. Or, for that matter, Harry Potter.

59) When being interrogated by a member of staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce 'These are not the droids you are looking for'.

60) Thestrals do not resemble the Muggle toys known as 'My Little Pony'.

61) The four Houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Smarts and the Junior Death Eaters.

62) Despite my personal beliefs, Quidditch would not be improved by the introduction of muggle firearms.

63) Though they are doubtless more athletic, battle-axes are not acceptable either.

64) I will not claim there is a prequel to Hogwarts, A History that explains about Bilbo Baggins.

65) I will not use the Marauder's Map for stalking purposes.

66) I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing.

67) I am not allowed to ask Professor Dumbledore if the size of his beard is 'compensating for something'.

68) I will not create a betting pool that Voldemort is Harry Potter's father.

69) Headmaster Dumbledore is of no relation to Willy Wonka.

70) Professor Snape's proper given name is not Princess Silvermoon Fairywing GlimmerMcSparkles.

71) Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are not the magical equivalent of "Batman and Robin".

72) I will not play the Imperial March theme for Professor Snape.

73) However, when Lucius Malfoy visits, I may play it.

74) If I insist on carrying out my plans of producing "Riddle-de-dee: The Voldemort Musical", I will do so under a nom-de-plume.

75) I will not attempt to recruit the title character to play himself. Even if he looks good in tap shoes.

76) I should not refer to Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle collectively as "Team Rocket" either.

77) I am not allowed to discuss my theory that Voldemort is actually the second cousin of Sauron.

78) I am not a 'ninja sent here by Lord Voldemort to destroy Harry Potter' and should stop shouting this at meal times.

79) It’s not tasteful to approach Cho wearing a shirt that says All the good looking ones die young with a picture of Cedric Diggory on it.

80) I will not yell "Hey look it’s Lord Voldemort!" at Hogsmeade

81) I will not tease Voldemort about the time he needed his pink flowery teddy bear to comfort him when he had that bad, bad nightmare about Harry

82) I will not charm a poster of Britney Spears on Draco's wall

83) I am not allowed to begin each Herbology class by singing the theme song to “Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.”

84) I will not call Professor McGonagall “McGoogles”.

85) I will not sing the entire Multiplication Rocks series during Arithmacy exams.

86) There is no such thing as the chamber of Double Secret Probation.

87) My name is not “the Dark Lord Happy-Pants” I am not allowed to sign my papers as such.

88) Bringing fortune cookies to divination class does not count for extra credit.

89) I will not douse Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak with lemon juice to see if he will become visible while wearing it and standing by the fire in the common room.

90) I will not tell first years they should build a tree house in the Whomping Willow.

91) I will not teach the house elves to impersonate Jar Jar Binks.

92) I will not give Gryffindors pixie sticks.

93) I am not allowed to refer to Susan Bones, Hannah Abbot, and Justin Finch-Fletchley as Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles.

94) A time turner is not a flux capacitator I should therefore not try to install it in a muggle car.

95) I shall not refer to DADA professors as canaries in a coal mine.

96) When fighting deatheaters in the annual June good vs. evil fight I will not lift my wand skyward and shout “There can only be ONE”.

97) A wand is for magic only, it is not for picking noses, playing snooker, or playing drums no matter how bored I become.

98) It is generally accepted that cats and dragons cannot interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory no matter how wicked the results would be.

99) 42 is not the answer to every question on the O.W.L.S.

100) I am allowed to have a cat, rat, toad, or an owl. I am not allowed to have reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha.

101) No matter how good an Australian accent I can do I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.

102) I will not refer to the Defense against the Dark arts professor as Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.

103) Dumbledore is not Gandalf, and the Triforce is not hidden in Hogwarts.

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'M RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be a prude
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm Anti-Religious, so I MUST hate God
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.

I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy
.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills. (When I’m stressed!)
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT so I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos
I write LEMONS, so I MUST be a twisted pervert.
I wear GLASSES, so I MUST be a dork or nerd

If you utterly dispise the colour pink copy and paste thid into your profile and add your name to the list: Darth Sugar, lostsouloftheunderworld

I found out somthing really funny, if you google maps half of the places in Middle-earth...you can find them in Oz! I swear! We have a place called Rivendell! There is also Lothlorien Electronics and Mt Doom and Mordor Accomodation! You can find it all in Melbourne!

I wanted to buy an 'Offical Sword of Isildur' But my folks wouldn't let me! sob!

If you can't beat them, join them! If you can't join them, bribe them! If you can't bribe them, blackmail them! If you can't blackmail them, kill them! If you can't kill them, you're screwed!

Today, I thought about the phrase "revenge is sweet" and then thought about the phrase, "revenge is a dish best served cold." I have now come to the conclusion that revenge is ice cream

I don't write slash! if you don't write slash, copy and paste this into your profile

Try Not to Cry

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could

please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry I to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech
Students Who Were Lost

Please if you would,
Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as
"Try Not To Cry"
2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how
cold-hearted you really are...

Its ok to cry, I cried, so can you

If you almost cried while you read this copy this to your profile, and add your name to the list; Mysterious Miracle, Silverdiamond23, Peridot Tears, Katie Ladmoore, Moonstream-Warrior, Spottedpaw13, xXJedi Knight BlazeXx, Amarwen, lostsouloftheunderworld

1.Find a globe. Spin it. What does it say? New Zealand

2.Find a book. Turn to page 56, line 18, word 6. What does it say? thrown (Spirit Bound- Richelle Mead)

3.What can you hear right now? My computer grunting with the effort of keeping 3 internets open

4.Have a conversation with the closest living thing near you besides yourself. Me: What if the closest living thing is in another room and I can't be bothered getting up? Voice: Talk to me Me: Who is this? Voice: To be honest I don't know.

5.Turn on the TV. What show is on? Butter Menthol add. Adds are torture!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6.Type you name with your elbow. lo0stso0ullofthne8hjede454r3w0o5r4per (i really lost it at the end there! But the beginning was pretty good!)

7. Stand up. Close your eyes. Spin around three times. Stop. Open you eyes. What's the first thing you see? fan

8. If you could be anybody from Lord of the Rings, who would you be? Arwen

9.What happened the last time you were typing on this computer? my USB refused to eject and i thought i had lost a whole morrnings work!

10. Find the third letter of your answers. What do they spell? whcwt0nwu(What the hell?)

Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time? Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.

(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been pushed into an ice-cold pool copy and paste this into your profile

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile

1. YOUR REAL NAME: Kaitlin

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME:(first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Katizzle

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal): Purple Dog

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, and current street name): Elizabeth Alice

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of mom's maiden name):

Maskalam

6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink):

Silver Coffee

7. YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of your dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name):

Asiank

8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother's middle name):

My mum doesn't have a middle name!

9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets):

Black Cutie

10. Find the third letter of all your answers. Underline them. What do they spell?

Itrzslima

If you wish more people were like your friends on fanfic, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever misspelled your own fanfic screenname, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you horrible at taking direction... copy and paste to your profile...

If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

List Twelve of your favorite characters from your fandom, in no particular order. Then answer the questions about them.

1. Legolas

2. Alice

3. Aragorn

4. Bella

5. Alec Volturi

6. Jane Volturi

7. Arwen

8.Carlisle

9. Esme

10. Rose Hathaway

11. Adrian

12. Dimitri

1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?

(Legolas/Adrian) Nope...and i hope I never do!

2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

(Bella) She's pretty...but I not into girls

3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?

(Dimitri/Carlisle) Um...-Lostsouloftheunderworld is to disturbed to reply, please stand by!-

4. Can you recall any fics about Nine?

(Esme) Um..she's in some of the twilight ones i read...but i haven't read one souly about her!

5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?

(Alice/ Jane) Um...NO!NO!NO!

6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?

(Alec/Esme or Alec/Rose) Alec/Rose...it would be funny

7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?

(Arwen walks in on Alice and Dimitri) Um...uncomtable silence?

8. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?

(Legolas/Carlisle) don't want to know

9. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.

(Arwen/Dimitri) um...I really don't know!

10. Does anyone on your friends’ list read three hot?

(Aragorn) Yeah...just about every one of them!

11. Does anyone on your friends’ list write or draw eleven?

(Adrian) No! And if Bella could...she would currently draw his death...she aint happy with him!

12. Would anyone on your friends’ write Two/Four/Five?

(Alice/Bella/Alec) Um...Bella? We're all looking at you hon!

13. If you wrote a songfic about Eight, what song would you choose?

(Carlisle) um...i'd have to look...and i currently can't be bothered to go downstairs and get my ipod!

14. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?

(Legolas/Jane/Dimitri) Depends.

15. When was the last time you read a fic about Five?

(Alec) Um...end of last year, beginning of this year, somthing like that!

16. “(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (9) runs off with (7). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3).

Legolas and Arwen are in a happy relationship until Esme runs off with Arwen. Legolas, brokenhearted has a hot one night stand with Adrian and a brief unhappy afair with Dimitri, then follows the wise advice of Alec and finds true love with Aragorn.

What would you title this fic?

I really don't think I can!

Name 10 Twilight characters in a random order.

1. Alice
2. Bella
3. Rosalie
4. Charlie
5. Esme Cullen
6. Edward
7. Carlisle
8 Emmett
9.Jasper
10.Alec

1. Haveyou read a five/ten fic before?

(Esme/Alec) No...i sorta don't want to!

2. Do you think three is hot? How hot?

(Rosalie) Um...I think she is pretty...but as I said earlier...I not into chics!

3. What would happen if six got one pregnant?

(Edward/Alice) Well...it really grose considering they're like brother and sister Jasper would try to kill Edward and Bella would help

4. Do you recall any good fics about nine?

(Jasper) Yes...I can't remember what it's called but it's by Miss Lizzy Benate...or somthing like that!

5. Would seven and two make a good couple?

(Carlisle/Bella) EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Carlisle is her FATHER-IN-LAW!

6. Four/eight or four/nine?

(Charlie/Emmett or Charlie/Jasper?) Niether! They are both discusting!

7. What would happen if seven discovered three and eight in a secret relationship?

(Carlisle discovers Rose/Emmett?) Um...Rose and Emmet are already married...so no big deal!

8. Make a summary of at least twenty words for a two/six fic.

(Bella/Edward) Bella is just an average human girl. But what will happen when she meets the stange and beautiful Edward Cullen?

9. Is there such a thing as a four/ten romantic fluff story?

(Charlie/Alec) I hope not!

10. Suggest a title for a one/five Hurt/Comfort fic.

(Alice/Esme) Um...Heart to Heart

11. What kind of plot would you use if four wanted to seduce one?

Charlie/Alice. I just want to get that picture out of my head.

12. Does anyone on your friends list read number seven/nine slash?

(Carlisle/Jasper) NO!...I hope not! Bella?

Twilight Oath

I promise to remember Bella

Each time I carelessly fall down

And I promise to remember Edward

Whenever I'm out of town

I promise to obey traffic laws

For Charlies sake of course

And I promise to remember Jacob

When my heart fills with remorse

I promise to remember Carlisle

Whenever I am in the emergency room

And I promise to remember Emmett

Everytime there's a huge boom

I promise to to remember Rose

Whenever I see something that holds pure beauty

And I promise to remember Alice

When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me

I promise to remember Nessie

When I see that beautiful bronze hair

And I promise to remember Esme

When someone tells me they care

I promise to remember Jasper

Whenever my stomach isn't curled

And I promise to remember the Volturi

When someone speaks of dominating the world

Yes, I promise to love Twilight

Wherever I may go

So that all may see my obsession

Because I know what the Twilighters know

This is a quote from my friend Izzy(Don't know where she got it from!)

(: A stranger stabs you in the front;
a friend stabs you in the back;
a boyfriend stabs you in the heart,
but best friends only poke each other with straws (:

The Difference Between Fake Friends And Real Friends

Fake Friends: Never ask for food

Real Friends: Are the reason you have none!

Fake Friends: Call your parents Mr/Mrs

Real Friends: Call them Mum/Dad

Fake Friends: Bail you out of jal

Real Friends: Would sit next to you saying "Dawg...we screwed up...but that was fun!"

Fake Friends: Never see you cry

Real Friends: Cry with you

Fake Friends: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back

Real Friends: Keep it so long they forget it's yours!

Fake Friends: Know a few things about you

Real Friends: Could write a book about you with direct quotes

Fake Friends: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowed is doing

Real Friends: Would kick the whole crowds butt that left you

Fake Friends: Would knock on your front door

Real Friends: Would walk right in and say "I'm Home!"

Fake Friends:Are for a while

Real Friends: Are fo life

Fake Friends: Will talk bad to the person who talks bad about you

Real Friends: Will knock out the person who talked bad about you

Fake Friends: Would morn at your funeral

Real Friends: Would be in jail for killing the person that killed you

-I luv ya all! Izzy and Carina and Courtney and Bella and Hammy and all the others who wouldn't fit on this page if i tried to mention you all!

My fave quote

From- xXRandom NemesisXx. Story- Therapy

JediMaster has logged on

Pitchfork has logged on

Pitchfork: The Apocalypse is coming!

Pitchfork has logged off

JediMaster: Did I miss something?

DarkLord: No, Nemesis was just being weird.

JediMaster: Ok, the world is still spinning then.

SnakeMan: What does Nemesis being wired have to do with the world spinning?

JediMaster: Can you imagine Nemesis being normal?

SnakeMan: Good point.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot.

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (Of coures I talk to myself. Well, do I? Yes, I do. Well it's not my fault I'm so charming. Yeah, I know... I sound like Chris Jericho. Yeah, I do.)

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (Writing lists is funny. Not it's not! Oh I don't know...)

After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, 'Holy crap, this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffeine.

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

You tend to collect Bic Sticks off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason.

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.

(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)

This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and even if you don't.

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t re-post it?

Re-post this if you truly believe in God, and even if you don't.

Even when you can’t see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile

Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master...

He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher...

He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer...

He had no army, yet kings feared him...

He won no military battles, yet he conquered the World...

He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him...

He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today

Feel honored to serve such a leader who loves us...

If you believe in God and Jesus Christ his Son

then copy and paste this in your profile

If you ignore him, in the Holy Bible, Jesus says...

" If you deny me before man, I will deny you before my Father in Heaven..."

The Crazy Hyperactive Authoress To-Do List: Created by Wolf (She-Who-Has-A-Very-Long-Name)

1.) Write Saw: The Musical.

2.) Develop the ability to talk to vegetables. (Brocotongue!)

3.) Learn how to "billow" like Severus Snape.

4.) Make action figure of yourself.

5.) Prove to the word that gay sparkly vampires are even more pathetic than they believe.

6.) Enrage obsessed fan girls.

7.) Scream out random endings when walking out of the movie theater. (I can't believe it! Optimus killed Sam and ran off with Megatron!)

8.) Teach monkeys how to skydive.

9.) Create first ever cheese laser.

10.) Have own theme music.

11.) Find the penny at the bottom of the razor blade and and salt-filled jar.

12.) Discover why Dora the Explorer's parents let her explore the world all by herself.

13.) Sing made-up lyrics to Christmas Carols. During the summer.

14.) Read Shakespeare. You know, like in Romeo and Juliet, where Juliet fights that lion, and Romeo destroys the giant space station, and they all go to Burger King...yeah, I don't really know my Shakespeare stuff that well.

15.) Also prove to the children how Santa sits on the throne of lies.

16.) If this isn't enough, scream "I GOT CAKE MIX!" all the time. (Nemesis.)

17.) Warn younger children that if they aren't good this Christmas, Santa's little Dementors will come and suck all of their happiness away. Run from livid parents.

18.) Use security cameras as mirrors to pick your nose.

19.) Run around with a Force FX lightsaber, claimign you are a Jedi that must slay the evils of the world. Then attack anyone wearing Hannah Montana apparel.

20.) Develop sense of irony.

21.) Don't die yet.

22.) Conquer the world with flying monkeys.

23.) Teach monkeys how to skydive, then start an airshow.

24.) Build a city...then destroy it with rainbow dinosaurs!

25.) Copy and paste this onto your profile if you're an insane authoress/author, too! (Give Wolf credit, though. Or face the wrath of the hard core unicorns!)

Write Down Ten Random Characters!

1. Aragorn

2. Legolas

3. Bella

4. Hermione

5. Eowyn

6. Draco

7. Alice

8. Voldemort

9. Arwen

10. Snape

Four invites Three and Eight to dinner at their own house. What happens?

(Hermione invites Bella and Voldemort) Well...i just hope there's a house left afterwards!

You need to stay at a friend's house for a night. Whose house, One or Six?

(Aragorn or Draco?) Definatly Aragorn!

Two and Seven are making out when Ten walks in. Ten's reaction?

(Legolas and Alice are caught making out by Snape) Um...ok then!

Three falls in love with Six. Eight is jealous.What happens?

(Bella falls in love with Draco. Voldemort is jealous. What happens?) Um...Voldy kills Draco and tells Bella he loves her, Bella runs away screaming and Voldy is heartbroken!

Four jumps you in a dark alleyway. Who rescues you, two, ten or seven?

(Hermione jumps me in an ally. Who saves me? Legolas, Snape or Alice?) Legolas!...please

One decides to start a cooking show. Fifteen minutes later, what happens?

Aragorn's a good cook! it's Eowyn's cooking I'm scared of!

Three has to marry either Eight, Four, or Nine. Who do they choose?

(Bella has to marry Voldemort, Hermione or Arwen) Well Voldy is a stalker...so she's changing teams!

Seven kidnaps Two and demands something from Five for Two's release. What is it?

(Alice kidnaps Legolas and demands Eowyn to... go on/ supply an all expenses paid shopping trip.

Everyone gangs up on Three. Does Three stand a chance?

Depends. Has Edward turned her yet?

Everyone is invited to Two and Seven's wedding except for Eight. How does Eight react?

( Everyone is invited to Legolas and Alice's wedding except Voldy. How does he react?) Um...They'll make an interesting couple!

Why is Six afraid of Seven?

(Draco scared of Alice?) She'll take him on another shopping trip from hell!

Nine arrives late for Two and Seven's wedding. What happens and why were they late?

(Arwen arrives late to Legolas and Alice's wedding) um... I really don't know!

Five and Nine get drunk and end up at your house. What happens?

(Arwen and Eowyn) They start fighting over Aragorn and try to kill each other.

Nine murders Two's best friend (Has to be someone on the list). What does Two do to get back?

(Arwen has murded Legolas's best friend-Aragorn) Why would Arwen murder Aragorn? THe get MARRIED! Um...Legolas would probably kill her!

Six and One are in mortal danger. Does Six save One or themselves?

(Draco and Aragorn) Aragorn would save Draco...who would be wetting his pants and crying in the corrner!

Eight and Three go camping. But they forget food. What do they do?

(Voldemort and Bella) Voldemort runs away from Bella who is trying to suck his blood

Five is in a car crash and is critically injured. What does Nine do?

(Eowyn is critically injured in a car crash. What does Arwen do?) Pull the plug.

The quiz is over. By the way, how did Two and Seven end up?

Um...to be continued!

"Ringwraith number 5 made me cookies!" Therapy by xXRandom NemesisXx

If you are drawn to sharp, pointy objects, even though you are a total clutz, copy and paste this onto your profile

To all Twilight Obsessed Freaks :

Gather 'round all, and come sit by the fire
And I'll tell you all a tale
Its about the wonderful world of twilight
Where Edward is real
And Everyone in the whole world loves Twilight
Stephenie Meyer is a god
And Twilight is our Bible
And where is this wonderful place?
Where we can worship in in peace?
Well, the truth is-

IT DOSN'T EXIST SO STOP PRETENDING YOUR LIVING IN IT!!

HOLLY F* FUDGE ON A STICK! WHY CAN'T YOU PEOPLE GET OVER IT!?

ITS JUST A BOOK!! (Don't get me wrong, Twilight's ok, but seriously, it's getting out of hand!)

I love reading, writing and anything to do with music - it's one of my passions.

I am a firm believer in Fate, True Love and Soul Mates.

I am completely obsessed with love and cannot wait until I find it.

I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal.
I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face.
I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone.
I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain.

BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Harry Potter, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things.

Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: Iheartjake1220, FaerieRose13., Slytherin Queen 1.30, Lostsouloftheunderworld

Perfection is a waste of time.

If you think that animals are to look at and not to eat, copy this into your profile

If Fanfiction is your way of escaping reality and the rest of the boring people in the world and truly "unleashing your imagination" then paste this in your profile and add your name: Emerald Princess 14, StardustFromThePlanetGallifrey, NarnianLady, KingdomHeartsNerd, TohruROX2221, Slytherin Queen 1.03, lostsouloftheunderworld

If your friends are considering torturing you to stop you talking about a fictional character, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.

"A ninja waits until the dead of night, when the enemy sleeps and drops his guard, when his weapons lie forgotten in the stillness of the night, that is the moment for a ninja to strike." Copy and Paste if you're a Ninja!

I've got a little thing to say to all my friends.
If you cry, I cry...
If you laugh, I laugh...
If you fight, I fight...
If you jump off a cliff...I'm gonna miss your retarded ass...

-If you're not too fond of little children, then copy this onto your profile.

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever cried when your favorite character died/almost died, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have inside jokes... with yourself... copy and paste this into your profile.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

The trouble with alarm clocks is that they always go off when you're asleep. -that ad i sleep right through them!

Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell's afraid I'll take over.

The cops never find it as funny as you do.

God created boys before girls because every true artist creates a rough draft before a masterpiece

Boys are like purses: cute, full of crap, and always replaceable

Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't

You know it's a bad day when you roll off the bed...and miss the floor.

You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you are all the same.

I'm not afraid of death. What's it going to do? Kill me?

Therapist = The/rapist . . . Scary thought.

Remember what you just said, because tomorrow I am going to have a witty and sarcastic comeback and you'll be devastated then!

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."

I apologize, do you want me to mean it too?

The dinosaurs extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor"--a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck, my friends, for I may not return alive.

Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is.

Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’.

Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever.

Professor Moody …presents the best ‘teaching’ Hogwarts has seen in a while.

Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to disagree

Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’.

Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy … disagrees.

Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand.

Ron Weasley … is very afraid.

Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much.

If you were sad when Steve Irwin died, copy this into your profile.

Why is Cinderella a fairy tale? Any idiot can lose a shoe!

'I used to have superpowers, but my therapist took them away'

'you're just jealous because the voices only talk to me'

If Joe Jonas (or any Jonas Brother) dies
90 of girls will die too,
5 would scream,
if you’re one of the 5
who will throw a big party
in celebration of his death,
copy and paste this on your profile

If you think High School Musical is evil,and brainwashes little kids,copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever tripped over a pillow, copy this into your profile.

If you have stared at your computer for a complete hour copying and pasting copy and paste its into your profile copy and paste this into your profile.

If you absolutely LOVE to sing even though you may or may not suck copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever been told a joke, not gotten it, and then burst out laughing half an hour later when you actually got it, copy & paste this into your profile.

If you've ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this into your profile.

"Being normal is for freaks."-unknown

"They have sent us to this dungeon, more commonly known as school."-unknown

"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then let everyone else wonder how you did it." -unknown

"You laugh at me now, but you won't be laughing at me when I crawl out from under your bed tonight."

"Whenever I have trouble sleeping, I count the buckles on my straightjacket."

"Penguins!! They steal your sanity one brain cell at a time!!"

"What girls don't seem to know: If a guy acts like he hates you, chances are he likes you. What guys don't seem to know: If a girl acts like she hates you, chances are she hates you."

"They say 'Guns don't kill people, people kill people.' Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people." -unknown

When life gives you skittles, throw them at your enemy and scream "Taste the rainbow, you b-tch!!"

All the good ones are gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.

()()
(0.0)
( _ )

Paste the bunny on your profile and join the dark side!

'Sarcasm isn't an attitude, it's an ART.'

'Knowledge is power; power is the root of all evil. Therefore study to be evil.'

'I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it!'

Boys say that in everything they do, they can kick a girl's butt so bad that they cry. If you're a girl who kicks the boys' butts so bad they cry like girls, copy this into your profile, and add your name KaidaThorn Gingerstar14 ZaraPotterCullen,Hawk's-Gal4077, Xqulth, WolfDog127, Slytherin Queen 1.30, lostsouloftheunderworld

If you have ever yelled at your television because a character or someone you don't like was on copy and paste this into your profile.

Here's a "music quiz" (sort of) - sometimes it's so interesting to see the results of putting your iTunes library on shuffle and scribbling down a song for every "question"

Opening credits: Where to Begin (Bowling for Soup)

Waking up: BFFF (Bowling for Soup)

First day at school: Decode (Paramore)

Falling in love: Mamma Mia (ABBA)

Fight song: Chocolate (Kylie Minogue)

Breaking up: Stuck (Stacie Orrico)

Prom: Welcome to my Truth (Anastacia)

Life is good: Heaven Knows (The Corrs)

Mental breakdown: Try Too Hard (Pink)

Driving: I Can't Stay Away (The Veronicas)

Flashback: Keep Your Hands off My Girl (Good Charlotte)

Getting back together: Art Of Love (Guy Sebastian)

Wedding: Smoke On THe Water (Deep Purple)

Paying the dues: Most Girls (Pink)

Night before the war: Black Betty (Spiderbait)

Final dance: Never Think (Rob Pattinson)

Moment of triumph: Down For The Count (Bowling for Soup)

Death scene: My Immortal (Evanescence)

Funeral song: The Right Time (The Corrs)

End credits: I'm a Believer (Smash Mouth)

F.E.A.R.: F--k Everything And Run.

Nine Things I Hate About Everyone:

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for
the time... I know where my watch is pal, where the
heck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask
where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their ass to
search the entire room for the TV remote because they
refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel
manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your
cake and eat it too".
Damn right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "It's always the last place you
look".
Of course it is. Why the heck would you keep looking
after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and
where are they? They need their ass kicked!

5. When people say while watching a film "Did
you see that?".
No Loser, I paid 12 bucks to come to the cinema and stare
at the floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"...
Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'.
Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been
anything before it.
If it's an improvement, then there must have been
something before it.

8. When people say "Life is short". What??
Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!!
What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks
"Has the bus come yet?".
If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

I'm the kind of girl who laughs at horror movies, then screams at the top of her lungs when the toast pops up.

I'd rather be hated for who I am then be loved for who I'm not.

I'm an angel. The horns are just to keep my halo straight.

"You need people of intelligence for this sort of mission...quest...thing."-Pippin-LOTR-FotR

-Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hot-line. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities press 3, 4, 5, 6. If you are paranoid, we know what you are and what you want so stay on the line and we'll trace your call. If you are delusional press 7 and your call will be sent to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer you. If you are dislexic press 6, 9, 6, 9, 6, 9. If you have a nervous disorder fidget with the hatch key until the beep. After the beep, please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again later and if you have low self esteem, hang up; all our operators are too busy to talk to you.

If you would cause a could-be world apocolypse just to see Justin Beiber dead, copy this into your profile!

When life gives you Edward Cullen, smile evilly and go to your stash of weapons.

A fail so epic, it's almost a win.

I'm sarcastic, what's your superpower?

Look, Dora, you're the one with the freakin' map, don't ask ME!

Dora is only teaching kids to be stupid, I mean, c'mon, any normal kid could see the giant mountain that is RIGHT. THERE. BEHIND THEM!!!!

We get it. You're the map. Why don't you say it again in case we didn't hear you?!?!?!?!

My name is Sarah

I am but three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren't ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all

I can't do a wrong

Or else I'm locked up

All the day long

When I awake I'm all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll get just

One whipping tonight

Don't make a sound!

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse

My name he calls

I press myself

Against the wall.

I try and hide

From his evil eyes

I'm so afraid now

I'm starting to cry.

He finds me weeping

He shouts ugly words,

He says its my fault

That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And I run for the door.

He's already locked it

And I start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream

But its now much too late

His face has been twisted

Into unimaginable hate.

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

Oh please God, have mercy!

Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door,

While I lay there motionless

Sprawled on the floor.

My name is Sarah

And I am but three,

Tonight my daddy,

Murdered me.

Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!

Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this and if you almost cryed post this in your profile

1. write the name of a person of the opposite sex. "Legolas. What? It never said it couldn't be a fictional character!"

2. which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, and green. "Black"

3. your first initial? "K"

4. your month of birth? "July"

5. which color do you like more, black or white? "Black"

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours. "Bella"

7. your favorite number? "24"

8. do you like California of Florida more? "California"

9. do you like the lake or ocean more? "Ocean"

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one.) "I want the extended versions of LOTR for my birthday!"

Are you done? If so, Pencils down. DON'T CHANGE YOU ANSWERS!!

Ok, Now Scroll down to see you results!

(Don't cheat--)

Your Results Are:...

1. You are completely in love with this person. "Legolas"

2. If you choose:

Red: You are alert and you life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and aggressive.*

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: you are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the one you love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

3. If you're initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life. *

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and you love life is soon to blossom

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If You were born in:

Jan-Mar: The year will for very well for you and you will discover the you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr-June: you will have a strong love relationship that will no long but the memories will last forever

July-Sept: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experience for the good.*

Oct-Dec: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul mate.

5. If you choose...

Black: your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you and you will be glad for the change.*

white: You will have a friend who completely confides in ykou and would do anything for you but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend. "Bella"

7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime. "24"

8. If you choose...

California: You like adventure.*

Florida: You are a laidback person.

9. If you choose...

Lake: You are loyal to you friends and you love. And you are very reserved.

Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.*

10. This wish will come true only if you Re-post this bulletin in one hours and it will come true before your next birthday(LotR!!!!!!!!!)

Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again? -Unknown

If you lack common sense, copy and paste this onto you're profile. (That is the shear definition of me)

Practice makes perfect, but then nobody is perfect so whats the point of practicing? -Unknown

Someone once asked me what it felt like to turn 13, and i gave them the only answer I could: Like an enegiser bunny on a sugar high!-Lostsouloftheunderworld.

I stopped listening ages ago, why haven't you stopped talking?

I don't have a liscence to kill...only a learners permit.

The word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people

Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over.

Whoever said that nothing is impossible has never tried slamming a revolving door

I smile cause I don't know what the hell is going on.

Don't follow in my footsteps; I tend to walk into walls.

If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile.

War does not determine who is right...war determines who is left

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." - Albert Einstein

“Are you insulting my intelligence!?”
“No, I’m insulting your stupidity.” -Therapy Chapter 17

56: I will not ask Sam if he likes green eggs and ham.

"So you say your name is Sam?" Faramir inquired. The Gondorian was currently questioning the two captives, though whether or not Faramir was brutal with this action depends on if this is the books or movies.

Looking wary, the hobbit nodded, expecting a question about the Ring. Frodo tugged slightly on Sam's cloak.

But Faramir astonished the two of them. "I am Sam?"

Sam shook his head, dumbfounded. "No! Sam I am!"

"Do you like green eggs and ham?"

Sam's eyes widened. "I do not like green eggs and ham! i do not like them Sam I am!"

Frodo rolled his pathetic blue eyes. "You know, sir, you're only the twenty-eighth person to ask him that."

Faramir's eyes twinkled. "I figured." -100 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do inMiddleearth Chapter 12

What you call being "too lazy to review" is what we call "a flame to the pages" as the writers. That one minute or two that you felt "too lazy" to review is another minute of creeping discouragement that all writers feel as they begin to think...

"Why am I even here…?"

"What's even the point of continuing?"

"My skills must be terrible…no one cares for my story…"

"I'll never be a good writer...I quit."

These are only a few thoughts that go through every writer's head- that go through MY head- when we put out a chapter / story with all our heart and soul within, and we sit there…and sit…and wait…and not a single person says even a word.

If you're not a writer, you have NO IDEA how much that hurts…

If you ARE a writer, then I'm sure you know just how great it feels when someone is kind enough to leave a heartwarming and encouraging review, and you read it, smiling while thinking…"Wow…I did it…"

So, why not give fellow writers the same luxury here?

Too many times I've seen epic and utterly beautiful works of literary art fall to pieces before finally being abandoned due to the terrible discouragement that the lack of reviews can cause.

Sometimes, it is so severe that the very writer himself decides to quit, denying the world his skills of writing that I'm it would have deeply enjoyed.

So…

Just one minute, that's all it takes. Just a few gentle taps of the fingers on your keyboard, a few seconds or so of your time, and your words can SAVE a writer from a dark demise.

Do me a favor: Go find a story, ANY story, anywhere here on Fanfic,net, and see if you can help it. If it has very little / no reviews at all, just check it out, and say whatever comes to mind.

And enjoy the thought in mind that you could have just SAVED that story, with just a few taps of the keyboard…

If you agree with what I have said then please copy and paste any part of this story you wish onto your profile.

16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"

Repost this if you laughed...
Or are planning to do any of these things

Being tolerant, understanding, and loving is not wrong...no matter who someone loves

If you support gay marriage and want to show it, paste this into your profile.

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.
2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans...

PLEASE READ WHAT'S UNDER THIS!!

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it.

WHETHER IT BE BETWEEN TWO MALES, TWO FEMALES OR A MALE AND A FEMALE, LOVE IS LOVE! AND NOTHING LESS THAN JUST THAT!

"Well since Smith is such a git I'd like to hear what he has to say." Parvati suggested.

Smith lifted up his middle finger, "Says the bitch herself. You know what, you can suck mine."

"Sorry, I grew up being told not to put small objects in my mouth." Parvati retorted.

Padma laughed, leaning back on her cushion.

"Mate," Dean laughed "you just got owned." " The Brave Ambition chapter 8 by Alli79nomel (a.k.a.- THE BEST DRARRY EVER!)

Remind me how you became an Auror again?" James asked Victoire.

"Because I can hex your balls off that's how," Victoire told him.

"You couldn't get anywhere near my balls," James scoffed.

"You want to bet Potter?" Victoire challenged.

Teddy shrugged. "They're your balls…personally I wouldn't be offering them up."

"There's nothing to hex anyway," Victoire said putting away her wand.

"Hey," James frowned "now that is a bit below the belt don't you think?" " -School Student's Saviour, Chapter 3 by Alli97nomel

Draco laughed. "Well you fell asleep and I could not risk anyone coming in and finding us naked on the floor together; but I did not want to wake you. So I…might havecarried you to the Room of Requirement."

"Might have?" Harry asked wide-eyed.

"Could have."

"Could have?"

"It is quite likely I did."

Harry stared at him.

"Alright, I did." -The Brave Ambition, Chapter 18 by Alli97nomel

Ginny had overheard Snape telling Dolohov. Ginny told Neville, Luna, her parents, Fred and George and Dean. Dean had told Seamus. Seamus had told Lavender and in turn she told Pavarti. Parvati told Padma who had already heard it from Luna, and she wrote a note to her girlfriend Katie and sent it via owl. Pavarti wrote a letter to Molly and Arthur only to discover that they had received word from Ginny earlier this morning. Padma had told Terry Boot and he told Anthony Goldstein. Marcus Flint's younger brother had overheard Anthony telling his team mate during Quidditch Ravenclaw's practice, which he had been spying on. He told Millicent who told Daphne who told Blaise. Blaise had told Pansy after they had fucked twice and when the end of lunch came she told Draco in the charms class they had together -The Brave Ambition, Chapter 19 by Alli97nomel

thanks to FaelwenofLothlorien, Babybells101, stabbythings,kimmiekk, rangergilan, princess-enigma,trentxgwen-heart-, Slytherin Queen, Dei-kun is mine u bitches, rivierlina,sunnigirldazzle, ULTIMATE-OTAKU-47-11, Lone White Wolf,Freya-The-Warrior-Rina, nekoFlein, Layla's Lancaster, Lalin, Aoife.Tierney, Tiryn and sci-fi-rocks for reviewing me and putting me on autor/story alert/favourites!! u guys make me so happy! ;] (Sorry! That you guys are down here but my computer is throwing a fit!) Also thanks to I'm Not What I Seem, InvisibleNewYorkHatsAreAwesome, Adurna-Brisngr, Skyscream259, MissUnderRated, Sarcastic Chocolate Bar, ganzanz, Ruby Pen, XxRandom CookiexX, The Singing Sharpie, LUNA GURLZ, fanime013, horserider15, hyper.lolita426, narugaaralover, Quirkyquizler16, BellaLovesStarkSoMuch, Melody-chii, Lucia Rayne,xThatxOnexChick, shinyaluv555,Radioactive-Nerd-Love-Scene,alfalfa7, Kattheyellowcat, Puppet White, Kixara, Tiryn,betholly, cuddlyteddybearsliketosmile, NaruVamp, kneegirl, hourseluvr888, nightstalkerofshadows, Harmonyflower,xxmadmooxx1995xx,Merlins hairy left testicle, sweetElisabeth, THeOddestParadox, NiraTheSheElf, Leather Dragon, lillytuttle, DarkAngel620, Jinx-the-darkness, Star Tae, Christiana Lacey, fatima7860, MiluielofLorien92, Babygirl555, Punk Scene Goddess, Valinor's Twilight, Eleniel of Ithilien, DivaSister1, antaurilover685, briannab, lilypadandprongs4eva, jaejoong1, TheScarletSerpent, xXxFantasyAmorexXx, frootyloops165, Feeshfeesh, BellaWannaBe, lunastars500, CryingBlackCherryTigerBlossoms, Wolf of the Dawn, Shea-Shea752, RenegadeVampireGirl, StarlightShivers, Shibien11, 1122Rose, CharlotteDarkrose, emickohania21, Auzie Ninja, Iris Cullen 13 musicgirl0723 Juliette World, DreamsRWhatUMakeThem, The Shadow In My Heart, Moony,PadfootProngs14, Skull-sama, Starlit007day, LUNA GURLZ, dallas1990, Moony08, MoonBeingRuler, LadyLily18, MistyOwl9250, Scuffed-kicks, AlexaB, Niiroya BlackDeath6, BritneyJean, princessyuki08, MisplacedObject, dduckfan, Trina Tiffany, Sandra Sand, jorja85, Mitodoteria, firewolf007, KrystylSky and Rayne91! Also thanks to all the anonymous reviewers!

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

70 Years by CrystalIceSweet reviews
When Harry is sent accidentally to 1940s and gets stranded in NY, a young soldier, Steve Rogers takes him in. Attraction was immediate and after a secret night of passion, Harry returns to the present and discovers, to his shock, that he was pregnant with Steve's child. Luckily, he won't have to explain this to Steve since he won't be seeing him, right? Mpreg. SR/HP.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avengers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 23,965 - Reviews: 636 - Favs: 1,026 - Follows: 1,901 - Updated: 7h ago - Published: 3/17/2013 - Harry P., Captain America/Steve R.
Empathy by RubyHair reviews
Jim is 1/2 Veenan, an Empath & telekinetic. K/S starts at the academy & goes beyond, eventual MPREG in a way that makes biological sense. Based on challange from KS archive. Story is AU but will incorporate both movies.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 27 - Words: 117,191 - Reviews: 421 - Favs: 516 - Follows: 702 - Updated: 3/10 - Published: 8/8/2011 - J. Kirk, Spock
Blood of the Enemy, Forcibly Taken by Zikare reviews
After the war ends Harry begins his work as an Auror and is charged with watching Draco. Draco was impregnated by Voldemort as punishment for letting Harry go from Malfoy Manor. Only Voldemort's body was created in a ritual from components from 3 people and the paternity test gives surprising results. Short story, Not epilogue compliant, Slash, Drarry, Mpreg, Rated M for Mild Smut.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 99,152 - Reviews: 348 - Favs: 247 - Follows: 371 - Updated: 2/16 - Published: 7/25/2013 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Dancing by puppygitl8u reviews
High school student Alfred Jones went to a friends party, and met a man who loved dancing. Will he come out for him? Or will his parent's hate on being gay keep him hidden and away from love? Sorry if the summary sucks, I'll try to make the story better. Humans, Yaoi so be warned. EDIT: ON HIATUS
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 26 - Words: 89,291 - Reviews: 151 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 144 - Updated: 2/7 - Published: 11/10/2012 - [England/Britain, America]
Knocking On Classroom Doors by Niji-chi reviews
I was just your average 17 year old. That is, until the stupid Commie decided he wanted to play his little game with me. Now my high school life in painfully controlled because of a stupid horror movie and a bet. Yeah, I'm screwed.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 40,845 - Reviews: 147 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 2/6 - Published: 4/7/2012 - America, Russia
Hold It Against Me by TheSlashBunny reviews
Jim drags Leonard to a dance club on an alien pleasure planet during a shore leave. Surely nothing good can come from a place where masks are mandatory, but shirts are not. Warning: language, alcohol, unprotected anonymous sex Pairing: McCoy/?
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 28,092 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 142 - Updated: 1/25 - Published: 1/12/2011 - L. McCoy/Bones, P. Chekov
The Greyest Eyes by Sophie French reviews
It's one thing to discover you're gay at eighteen, another one to realise you have a crush on your long-term enemy, but you can tell things are definitely going to get complicated when you accidentally say his name as your girlfriend kisses you... HP/DM. Eighth year fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 90,948 - Reviews: 199 - Favs: 226 - Follows: 238 - Updated: 1/19 - Published: 8/20/2013 - [Harry P., Draco M.] - Complete
The Pitfall by Chelsea Lynn reviews
"I...I love Ron." His lips brushed against her ear as he breathed softly, "Then tell me to stop." They thought the war was over. Little did they know it was only just beginning. Dramione fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 142,502 - Reviews: 871 - Favs: 876 - Follows: 1,309 - Updated: 1/4 - Published: 8/18/2011 - [Hermione G., Draco M.] [Luna L., Blaise Z.]
A Rebel With A Tainted Heart by victoriamalfoytw reviews
After the War, the seventh years are given the option to return for a newly made eighth year. But with two Slytherins and two Gryffindors as Heads and Deputy Heads, combined with the Ministry's new Marriage Law and a Death Eater plot for revenge, will the year play out smoothly? And who really has changed for the better, or for the worse? HermionexDraco GinnyxBlaise
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 65,420 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 210 - Follows: 226 - Updated: 12/12/2013 - Published: 9/22/2012 - Hermione G., Draco M., Ginny W., Blaise Z. - Complete
After A One Night Stand by 69withmomsen reviews
What happens after a drunken one night stand between Harry and Draco? Slash. Possible Mpreg.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 16,157 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 159 - Follows: 250 - Updated: 10/26/2013 - Published: 12/22/2011 - Harry P., Draco M.
Why not by StreetlightsAndRaindrops reviews
England and France are friends, England is going through his rebellious phase, and France finally tells England how he feels Later will contain mpreg and already contains lemon Pairing Fruk
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 17 - Words: 40,861 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 7/13/2013 - Published: 12/22/2012 - France, England/Britain
Ordinary Life Shackles Me by drarryisgreen reviews
Warning: MPREG. Draco is a free bird until he finds out he's pregnant but, what do you do when you've slept with half the town and then some? Pregnant!Draco. Bottom!Draco, Top!Harry - switching implied. Harry/Draco, Draco/(Several Other Characters). Written for harrydracompreg fest. Fluff, Angst, Rated M for language and implication of sex. (Not explicit).
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 17,620 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 134 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 6/24/2013 - Published: 6/20/2013 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Russian Lessons by Autumnfallsonme reviews
When Alfred needs help with his Russian class, it's nice to have a boyfriend who is willing to do anything to help you learn. Warning: Contains Yaoi and Smut
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,817 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/3/2013 - America, Russia - Complete
New Directions by DrarryTLA reviews
As their seventh and final year at Hogwarts begins, Ron and Hermione know that Harry has changed... But How? The ring around his finger proves their suspicions that his life is taking a new direction... But with who, and why? Slash.DumbledoreBASHING.Mpreg
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 23 - Words: 51,893 - Reviews: 556 - Favs: 691 - Follows: 1,049 - Updated: 5/30/2013 - Published: 1/3/2011 - Harry P., Draco M.
The Cunning Nerve by Alli97nomel reviews
Sequel to THE BRAVE AMBITION: This is the story about the blonde without a Dark Mark and the raven without a scar.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,344 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 5/11/2013 - Published: 4/4/2013 - Albus S. P., Scorpius M.
Naive by snake eyes and sissies reviews
Tony sets out to seduce Steve but ends up getting more deeply involved with him. Bottom!Steve and mpreg. You've been warned.
Avengers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 28,902 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 147 - Follows: 89 - Updated: 5/6/2013 - Published: 4/20/2013 - Captain America/Steve R., Iron Man/Tony S. - Complete
The Adventures Of IKEA by America's Lover reviews
Tino & Berwald are forced to pick up Mathias' new bed from IKEA, and seeing that it is the last of the collection there, Tino comes up with the brilliantly wonderful idea to christen his new bed for him. Just your general Sweden/Finland- sex- in- IKEA fanfiction. [Rated M for porn qualities and scenes of a homosexual nature.]
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,966 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/5/2013 - Sweden, Finland - Complete
Potato Gnocchi by ratsister reviews
America drunkenly stumbles into England's room of magical artifacts and causes a lot of international issues; particularly for Germany & Italy. Human and Country names used, Rated M to be on the safe side for now. Mpreg. GerIta, just a bit of AmeCan.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 28,611 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 95 - Updated: 5/5/2013 - Published: 9/18/2011 - Germany, N. Italy
Flag waving of a misfit by batty29 reviews
Lovino is openly gay at a very homophobic school; natural things aren't all peachykeen for Lovino. That is until Antonio enters the picture. Spamano RussCan GerIta other small pairings.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 39,067 - Reviews: 254 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 234 - Updated: 4/14/2013 - Published: 12/23/2011 - S. Italy/Romano, Spain
The Brave Ambition by Alli97nomel reviews
Maybe they just need each other, maybe they were meant to be even though everyone might think differently. Maybe they're just in love and maybe they just want to be together forever and is that really too much to ask? "I have always loved you, I never stopped! And I never will!" Harry said before taking a step forward and closing the gap between them that he decided would never be
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 23 - Words: 248,861 - Reviews: 352 - Favs: 330 - Follows: 311 - Updated: 4/4/2013 - Published: 8/19/2011 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
School Student's Saviour by Alli97nomel reviews
For all those students stuck in a shitty class and need an escape for a bit. This story involves the next generation Hogwarts students after they finish their last year of school. One apartment, ten people, let's see how it plays out. Swearing&Sex scenes!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 35,399 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 3/25/2013 - Published: 2/5/2012 - James P., Teddy L., Scorpius M., Rose W.
seven minutes with an angel by kirobashi-neko-chan reviews
a Invader-ZimXDib-Membrane and Kirobashi-neko-chan story. HunnyXMori! TamakiXHaruhi! Hitachicest! M-preg!. YAOI!
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,157 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 3/20/2013 - Published: 3/13/2013 - Haruhi F., Hunny/Honey/Mitsukuni H., Mori/Takashi M., Kaoru H.
Shattered Hearts by Emma Vance reviews
Kaoru wants to be around Hikaru , but what happens when the pain becomes too much and Hikaru finally notices somethings wrong? Warning: This. Is. Yaoi. If you don't like it, don't read it. And if you are looking at it then you are on the wrong side of fanfiction and don't blame me if you get something you didn't bargain for.
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,451 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 10 - Published: 3/19/2013 - Kaoru H., Hikaru H. - Complete
Make His Day by LumosMaximan reviews
Still stuck in hospital after his accident with Loki, Phil gets a surpise visit from one Captain Steve Rogers, who ended up giving more to the Agent then he originally intended! Enjoy the Capsicoul Love!
Avengers - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,233 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/6/2013 - Agent Phil Coulson, Captain America/Steve R. - Complete
Stupidity Is Just Our Thing by Dean's Dirty Little Secert reviews
Three teenager girls end up in the Lord of the Rings world and make a joke out of everything, yet they somehow still manage to find love ther. WARNING: Really Stupid Aragorn/oc Legolas/oc Merry/oc
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 15,691 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 3/5/2013 - Published: 12/8/2009 - Aragorn, Legolas
Honey's Other Side by thatkidthatfedyoutoaquig reviews
Honey has this other side, a perhaps not so innocent one, and it's only for Mori's eyes. Basically this whole thing is pointless. Slash. Lime.
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 796 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 6 - Published: 3/3/2013 - Hunny/Honey/Mitsukuni H., Mori/Takashi M. - Complete
Revival by WolfTotem64 reviews
The world as we know it has gone, the countries have either died or faded away into the 12 districts. But Panem, the country that destroyed it all, neglected the threat of the two brothers living in the South. Now they have banded together to avenge their dead, find the missing, and destroy the hunger games once and for all.
Crossover - Hunger Games & Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 36,377 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 2/17/2013 - Published: 8/5/2012 - Australia
Strawberry Creme by Gemonie03 reviews
Okay so this is total Mori/Hani PWP... but it's different... so.. Just go with the flow and have a nice day!
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,683 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/17/2013 - Hunny/Honey/Mitsukuni H., Mori/Takashi M. - Complete
Everything You Want by Arashi-No-Shadow reviews
Did you ever wonder why Mori and Hunny are so close? Does it only have to do with the fact that they've been best friends almost since birth, or is there a deeper reason? Rated for sexually explicit scenes and mention of suicide and cutting.
Ouran High School Host Club - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,897 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 10 - Published: 2/8/2013 - Mori/Takashi M., Hunny/Honey/Mitsukuni H.
American Pursuit by darkangel21892 reviews
When Alfred receives the board game Sexual Pursuit and brings it over to Ludwig's place, who knows what sort of fun will happen. (Similar to the Saiyan Pursuit)
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,792 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/9/2013 - America, Germany
Drink Me (or when Gwaine accidentally made a sex potion) by beckybrit reviews
Interesting things happen when Gwaine does the cooking.
Merlin - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,917 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 19 - Published: 1/1/2013 - Arthur, Merlin - Complete
Take Me Home by WolfTotem64 reviews
In the year 2012, the apocalypse was predicted.On the 21st of the 12th, the embodiments of the countries had vanished without a trace. Now, in the year 2064, the third world war has begun, and a young spy is sent to Japan to discover the secrets of the enemy, but by doing so, will he discover secrets about himself?
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,150 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 12/22/2012 - Published: 11/28/2012 - Hong Kong, Japan
I Hope It Has Your Ears by GirlLoveWarrior reviews
Merlin is eight months pregnant with Arthur's baby. This is just a fic about a winter's night they share together. Rated M for mpreg, sex and disgusting amounts fluffiness.
Merlin - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,169 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 12 - Published: 12/21/2012 - Arthur, Merlin - Complete
Late Night At the Bar by Kenny143 reviews
Germany invites all the nations out for drinks, and Prussia has a little too much. This was an RP I did with someone, but I don't know who they are so credit to you random stranger. Yaoi and uke!america.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,061 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 9 - Published: 12/7/2012 - Prussia, America - Complete
Bad Touch Trio: Night of Fun by DolMaAbZal reviews
After a night of drinking on the town of Paris, France. Francis, Gilbert and Antonio head back to Francis' home.. What will happen? This is MAJOR smut! Sex scenes and so on. Read at your own risk. PrussiaxFrancexSpain, I am adding this since I can't seem to add a third character thingy, sooo yeah. I suck at summaries READERS! You should also VOTE in my poll for the next story!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,519 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/4/2012 - Prussia, France - Complete
Obsession by PrinceofElsinore reviews
AU. Ludwig is happy to be at the same university as his older brother. But with new experiences his perceptions of himself-and his brother-change unexpectedly. Just when they seem closer than ever, so much threatens to tear them apart.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 25 - Words: 162,167 - Reviews: 389 - Favs: 259 - Follows: 208 - Updated: 12/2/2012 - Published: 8/7/2011 - Germany, Prussia - Complete
Dear Potter, if I were dating you by Draco's Felix reviews
If you asked Harry how he got into Malfoy Manor, he couldn't tell you. If you asked him why he was currently under Draco's bed, he wouldn't know. Because apparently, sudden memory loss is a side effect of shock, and Harry is very shocked to find a piece of parchment entitled 'Dear Potter, if I were dating you' under Draco's bed, clearly in Malfoy's handwriting. Abandoned - sorry!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 37,453 - Reviews: 239 - Favs: 214 - Follows: 396 - Updated: 11/30/2012 - Published: 8/3/2012 - Draco M., Harry P.
In The Tent by x.Mrs.ItachiUchiha.x reviews
LEMON, slight pwp, Percival x Gwaine. Whilst on a mission to retrieve Merlin, things get heated in the tent.
Merlin - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,689 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 6 - Published: 11/25/2012 - Percival, Gwaine - Complete
The Prussian-Russian Alliance by DementedJoker-chan reviews
Gilbert is in love with his dear brother. But he can't over power his brother anymore. Well not alone that is. Russia did owe him a favor maybe a quick call to him wouldn't hurt... THIS IS YAOI! Germancest, PruGer
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,607 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/20/2012 - Germany, Prussia - Complete
Punishment by lesipiratecat reviews
Ziva has a very uncomfortable day at work due to Abby's punishment. beware: slash included. dont like, dont read!
NCIS - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,280 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 5 - Published: 10/30/2012 - Abby S., Ziva D. - Complete
Your Mouth is Poison, Your Mouth is Wine by xpage394x reviews
Hermione & Severus gravitate towards each other during Hermione's 7th year. Hogwarts, Post-war, Rated M. Multi-Chapter story with lots of sexual tension.'Without thinking she caught his hand in her own before it could fall back to his side, "I trust you".
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 95,760 - Reviews: 451 - Favs: 221 - Follows: 466 - Updated: 10/28/2012 - Published: 2/22/2012 - Hermione G., Severus S.
Germancest by no78one reviews
Gilbert got in trouble and Ludwig needed to teach him a lesson... xD
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,161 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/28/2012 - Germany, Prussia - Complete
Black and White by The-REAL-leaders-of-Akatsuki reviews
When Harry reveals a shocking secret, it leads to an unforeseen turn of events. Will his friends learn to accept that not everything in the world is black and white? Mpreg, AU, post voldie manip Dumbles/ Molly/ Ginny, mild bashing.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,140 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 137 - Updated: 10/12/2012 - Published: 10/5/2012 - Harry P., Draco M.
When Goblins Err by ThornedHuntress reviews
Poker night ends early when Draco Malfoy's solicitor pays Hermione Granger a visit. One-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,127 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 13 - Published: 10/6/2012 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Product Testing by alwayssometimes reviews
fremione.smut. Fred tests out a product on Hermione , she will probably give it a great review.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,989 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 9/30/2012 - Published: 8/11/2012 - Fred W., Hermione G. - Complete
Bad Friends by MissLadyDemon reviews
BBT Smut. I don't own Hetalia.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,260 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/14/2012 - France, Prussia - Complete
The Maths Behind Friendship by FaelwenofLothlorien reviews
They were completely different. He was socially awkward, shy and more comfortable around equations. She loved parties, friends, and attention! So is their common age enough to start a friendship, or will they just hate each other? Chekov/OC
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,952 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 12 - Published: 9/11/2012 - P. Chekov
Good Luck Has Its Storms by CuriosityIsNotASin reviews
Harry always thought he had suspiciously good luck, only now… that good luck has run out. Who would have thought that one drunken night with fuzzy memories would leave Harry pregnant with Malfoy's child? It certainly hadn't crossed Harry's mind. Rated M. Slash.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 42,697 - Reviews: 336 - Favs: 282 - Follows: 346 - Updated: 9/1/2012 - Published: 6/10/2012 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Better Yet? by PixiePuppet reviews
Spock is 'sick' with...well, we all know what he's got. So, Kirk attempts to figure out what's wrong. Of course. Eventually, this will have more chapters, as I write them. Unbeta'd, all mistakes are mine. Rating on the safe side.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,327 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 8/31/2012 - Published: 8/28/2012 - J. Kirk, Spock
Tentacles x Prussia by MissLadyDemon reviews
There is something lurning in an old lab form WWII and Prussia's about to find out what and he's not going to like it. Moster x Prussia. GerPru.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,305 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 18 - Published: 8/30/2012 - Germany, Prussia - Complete
Four More Months by clawswrites reviews
Steve and pregnant!Tony spend a few moments together in bed. AU. Mpreg. Requested. Steve/Tony.
Avengers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,219 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 14 - Published: 8/7/2012 - Captain America/Steve R., Iron Man/Tony S. - Complete
The Exchange by theSilence reviews
DM/HP. When Harry drinks a potion that he created with Neville Longbottom, he goes through a HUGE change. And in the process, he makes new friends, faces new challenges, and even falls in love.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 152,288 - Reviews: 1114 - Favs: 1,151 - Follows: 752 - Updated: 8/4/2012 - Published: 6/23/2003 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Hot Night by Apocalyptici reviews
He likes doing this to me. He loves watching as my last shred of dignity is torn away from me from his constant torture. He likes watching me beg for mercy. And through it all he just smiles. Germancest,BDSM,Hardcore yaoi, PWP, Dom/Sub Read at own discretion please
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,004 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 7 - Published: 7/29/2012 - Germany, Prussia - Complete
Never Again by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Tormented by the sea longing, Legolas visits Minas Tirith. But when he is caught in a cave in, will friends he cannot remember be able to help him, or will he sail, having forgotten why he remained? Being Edited and reposted.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 26 - Words: 50,069 - Reviews: 286 - Favs: 117 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 7/19/2012 - Published: 4/30/2006 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
100 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do in Middleearth by Do a Barrel Roll reviews
Everything you shouldn't do if you want to survive in Middle-earth...yet the Fellowship and friends are going to do it all anyways. After all, where's the fun in war without a little chaos? Oh dear...It looks like Sauron will have a lot on his plate.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 15,819 - Reviews: 621 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 122 - Updated: 7/11/2012 - Published: 4/6/2010 - Aragorn, Sauron - Complete
Power Play by DestineyTot reviews
The other nations often view Russia as a power hungry, violent, and perverse nation. During a meeting, America's boredom and curiosity gets the best of him. He sets out to prove that Russia isn't the only one who can be violent and perverse. AmeRus, in that order.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,249 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 11 - Published: 7/9/2012 - America, Russia - Complete
Look At Where We Are Now by YaoiYuriFan reviews
Chances are a big part of life, and two people meet through one,and it sparks a new and sudden relationship. but if they're not careful,the spark for catch fire and burn them up. Spock/Kirk, mpreg/Jim
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,214 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 7/6/2012 - Published: 3/23/2011 - Spock, J. Kirk
A Conversation in New York by madwriter223 reviews
-Kink Meme Fill- Loki is back in New York. And boy, is he pissed off. Thor/Loki, MPreg, Serious MoodSwing
Crossover - Thor & Avengers - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 422 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 145 - Follows: 30 - Published: 7/3/2012 - Loki, Thor - Complete
Queer as Folk by PaolaAdara reviews
The root of all evil, Draco opines, is not money, nor a love story without a happy ending, but an innocent question of "What's it like with a bloke, Malfoy?" HPDM. EWE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 31,305 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 6/2/2012 - Published: 6/1/2012 - Harry P., Draco M.
Dear Agony by Fegele reviews
1871 Gilbert gave birth to his and Ludwig's daughter, Louise. It was the start of their Empire. Now, after the Second World War and at the start of the Cold War, they are going to have another little gift. It's the start of their hell. Germancest
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 35,090 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 5/31/2012 - Published: 2/22/2012 - Germany, Prussia
Take the World Apart by MissLadyDemon reviews
The world plans on taking over America's country. Alfred travels to Russia secretly and talks to Ivan about what's going to happen and then shocks Ivan with his way to solve it. They should get married and take over the world. RusAme. Snapped!America.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 32,114 - Reviews: 231 - Favs: 193 - Follows: 109 - Updated: 4/27/2012 - Published: 12/19/2011 - Russia, America - Complete
Quickie by Strobe Light reviews
Kirk and Spock have a quickie in the Turbolift. After Nero, just a short fic. Warning: Sexual Content, M for a reason. I own nothing, trust me, I would know.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 615 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 8 - Published: 4/13/2012 - Spock, J. Kirk - Complete
Draco Malfoy and the Wonders of Pregnancy by HarmoniousSilence reviews
HPDM MPREG! FOUL LANUGUAGE AND SEXUAL CONTENT AHEAD! Draco gets pregnant and Harry is left to put up with his often moody husband who is either craving weird foods or throwing a tantrum about how fat he is. ONESHOT
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,269 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/13/2012 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
A Very Sexy Alarm Clock by KitchenWitch1994 reviews
Jim feels pretty annoyed when he wakes up much earlier than usual. The feeling doesn't last when he finds out what he woke up for. Part two of the "Very" one-shot series. Slightly cracked, lots of K/S slash. Rated M for MATURE ADULT CONTENT.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,222 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 11 - Published: 4/13/2012 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
Releasing Tensions by RynnaJ reviews
When Russia sits on Canada during a meeting again, Canada says nothing and bears it. But when he discovers tension in Russia's back, he decides to give him a massage to release it. He had no idea what his actions would end up causing.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,570 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 239 - Follows: 29 - Published: 4/7/2012 - Canada, Russia - Complete
Laugh for Me by RynnaJ reviews
Inspired by a kink meme prompt. When a stressed Russia comes to visit, France tries to find a way to break him out of his temperamental state. An unexpected weakness of the larger nation turns out to be just what France needs to solve the problem.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,977 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 10 - Published: 3/22/2012 - France, Russia - Complete
All because of a potions accident by Slytherin ice princess reviews
In a potions lesson something goes wrong and Hermione relives certain memories that were meant to be forgotten accompanied by Draco. What will her friends think when they learn the truth not even she knew. HPHG and DMHG.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 15 - Words: 57,945 - Reviews: 283 - Favs: 126 - Follows: 141 - Updated: 3/13/2012 - Published: 12/11/2004 - Draco M., Hermione G.
Professor's Pet by VirginaBlueBelle reviews
Hermione and Severus had a secret relationship for a year and a half. What happens when Severus comes out of hiding? Re-post, not Ron friendly. Please read all A/N & if you have ?s make sure your PM is open. Thank you.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 25 - Words: 40,478 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 161 - Follows: 75 - Updated: 3/11/2012 - Published: 2/24/2012 - Severus S., Hermione G. - Complete
Together by xxkissmeimirishxx reviews
Fred and George always share. *Everything.* WARNING this is Twincest- DON'T LIKE, DON'T READ. Thank you to all the people who responded and luved! :D
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,431 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 15 - Published: 2/29/2012 - Fred W., George W. - Complete
Pickles by Praevarus reviews
Harry discovers Draco is pregnant in a rather unusual way. Slash, Mpreg.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,284 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 21 - Published: 2/20/2012 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
To Find The Missing Lifeline by EvilConcubine reviews
After traumatising events of his life Draco makes a hard decision to return at Hogwarts for his final year and finds himself in need of a help. Angst, H/C, MPreg. *complete*
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 23 - Words: 162,578 - Reviews: 320 - Favs: 391 - Follows: 133 - Updated: 2/2/2012 - Published: 1/10/2012 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Your Fingertips by lovebird17 reviews
Your fingertips told me all I needed to know. HP/DM, mPreg, this-will-hurt-your-teeth-fluff
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 651 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/28/2012 - Draco M., Harry P.
Turncoat by elizaye reviews
Switching sides. "I have only one condition, and I trust it won't be hard for you to meet. I want Granger." Rated M for sex/language/torture.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 101 - Words: 256,732 - Reviews: 6610 - Favs: 4,040 - Follows: 2,127 - Updated: 1/22/2012 - Published: 5/29/2011 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Surprise! by elizaye reviews
A Dramione drabble for the New Year.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 377 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 7 - Published: 12/31/2011 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Quiet Night, Yeah Right! by DoitsuDeutschland reviews
Alfred and Ivan need to find a Christmas gift for Ludwig but neither can find something so they take the advice of Gilbert and Arthur. Is sex the best kind of gift to give to Ludwig? Well, duh! RusUSGer belated X-mas fic
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,732 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/29/2011 - America, Germany - Complete
I'll Be There For You by IaminlovewithVegetaandTrunks reviews
Chapter Nine up! Society for the Protection of Abused Witches and Wizards. Harry/Draco Mpreg M/M Slash. Rating is for later chapters.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,070 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 145 - Follows: 231 - Updated: 12/24/2011 - Published: 9/18/2009 - [Harry P., Draco M.] [Hermione G., Ron W.]
Now What? by Chimamire-Hissori reviews
Russia shows up on Germnay's door step drenched from the rain. Russia has some information that he wants to confirm or reject about the German whose house he is infront of. Neither of them had what was going to happen planned. Human names used.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,328 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 12/5/2011 - Published: 6/27/2011 - Germany, Russia - Complete
A Space Exploration by spockndkirk-xoxo4ever reviews
"You've never had sex," Kirk said, wide-eyed and surprised. He was sure the half Vulcan had been laid before. I mean, he was a cute guy, he had to admit. Spock was too scared to even deny the accusation. "P-please don't t-tell anyone," he whispered
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,475 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/27/2011 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
Golden Ice by hllothere reviews
After the death of his father, Draco strives to be the person he always longed to be, as he looks to the future with hope, passion, and a new love. Complete! My first fic- read & review please!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 13,049 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 10/7/2011 - Published: 4/29/2011 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Our Angel by SwedishPancake reviews
What happens when you find out about something...'unexpected' Only time will tell. SuFin, Mpreg, Rated M for later chapters.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,499 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 102 - Published: 9/21/2011 - Sweden, Finland
Absolutely Zero by Caneater reviews
It's the summer after their graduation and Hermione is staying in London with her parents. She opens an e-mail account and starts writing to an old acquaintance from school...Dramione, Hermione/Ron
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,648 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 9/20/2011 - Published: 7/13/2011 - Hermione G., Draco M.
memoriae by hllothere reviews
Draco struggles to move on after Harry's death. Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,141 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 8 - Published: 8/22/2011 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Pat'iv'i Fruit by Eligh reviews
Jim and Spock accidentally eat an alien aphrodisiac. What happens next takes a bit of getting used to. Kirk/Spock, M for a reason. Don't like, don't read.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,364 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 310 - Follows: 17 - Published: 8/14/2011 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
Temptation Is Apparently Russian by Blazingdusk reviews
It didn't take much for McCoy to let the kid into his bed. Not much at all. McCoy/Chekov one-shot, very slashy.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,321 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/13/2011 - L. McCoy/Bones, P. Chekov - Complete
Forty Week Window by MarillaT'Pel reviews
During his first outing on Earth, Spock meets a young man with more going on than he first realizes. This story contains mpreg and eventual K/S. Rated for language and implications.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 21 - Words: 87,075 - Reviews: 223 - Favs: 390 - Follows: 220 - Updated: 8/2/2011 - Published: 3/28/2011 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
Happiness is Free by FrancieskaMarion reviews
Annabeth and Percy's life after marriage. Drama with Ex's, finding lost things, and finding out what it's all really about. A squeal to my story Overloved.
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 27,852 - Reviews: 345 - Favs: 139 - Follows: 113 - Updated: 7/28/2011 - Published: 3/24/2010 - Annabeth C., Percy J.
Therapy, The Sequel by ThisMortalCoil reviews
In which Anakin is a monkeys uncle, Obi-Wan has glasses, Palpatine's grand schemes always fail, Nemesis is a mad scientist and the characters learn that being stuck in space isn't very enjoyable.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 9,811 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 7/23/2011 - Published: 5/1/2011 - Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan K.
The Night Shift by Sunni D. Lockhart reviews
Dani, an ER physician, tends to have strange nightly medical adventures with an interesting gay couple, who clearly don't know how to have NORMAL sexual relations.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,369 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 9 - Published: 7/13/2011 - Germany, N. Italy
Repercussions by That Tath reviews
Elladan and Elrohir’s need for revenge would drive them to hunt orcs for years, but everyone ranging from Rivendell to Mirkwood would be affected. A collection of stories about the twins’ orchunting years.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 11 - Words: 15,728 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 7/5/2011 - Published: 10/21/2007 - Elrohir
A Light From The Shadow Shall Spring by Nieriel Raina reviews
A COLLECTION OF POETRY based on Tolkien's writings from humorous to serious and some in between.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,243 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/3/2011 - Published: 1/2/2009
All My Life by hllothere reviews
Harry is tired of being the Golden Boy and decides to rebel. Horrible at summaries. Oneshot songfic to "All My Life" by Avril Lavigne
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,825 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/1/2011 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
A Series of Unfortunate Events by Geeky-DMHG-Fan reviews
Set after DH and will completely ignore the Epilogue. Hermione keeps running into Draco Malfoy. Will anything other than disaster come from these chance encounters?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 119,246 - Reviews: 735 - Favs: 1,166 - Follows: 422 - Updated: 6/24/2011 - Published: 8/4/2009 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Diplomacy by LxISxAxBABE reviews
A suggestion from my favorite fanclub... When Francis visited Moscow, he only meant to form an alliance with their Russian brethren. That was, until he realized that both of them were thinking of a different kind of alliance. FRussia, yaoi LEMON!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,887 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/12/2011 - France, Russia - Complete
An Eevee's Wish by nightwhisperofshadows reviews
In a parallel universe, things are very different. Beast Boy is Raven's little brother and a different child is accepted into the Doom Patrol. This is Eevee's story.
Teen Titans - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,157 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 6/7/2011 - Published: 5/30/2011 - Beast Boy
Starting Fresh by hllothere reviews
Draco Malfoy knew he was dying. Post war; follows Harry and Draco as they go from friends to something more. Oneshot. Character death. Thanks a million to my lovely betas Unsuspected and purplecrown14.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,463 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 14 - Published: 6/7/2011 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Lost Years by hllothere reviews
After a nasty split, Harry and Draco go their separate ways, until a pair of green eyes draws them back together once more. A oneshot that is Melissa's explanation of why the actor who plays Scorpius looks so much like Dan and Tom.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,577 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/31/2011 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
A Ring of Wings by Terelex reviews
Max and the Flock are transported into the book The Lord of the Rings when an experiment goes wrong... or did it? I know it sounds really wierd but hey, why not? Rated T just in case.
Crossover - Lord of the Rings & Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 35 - Words: 88,083 - Reviews: 150 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 5/31/2011 - Published: 1/10/2010 - Complete
Starkid Theme Challenge Love by YourPontmercyFriend reviews
AVPM/Starkid inspired. Right before Quirrell is released from Azkaban to him and Voldy officially getting together, Quirrellmort. Written for a theme challenge, more about that in the story. T for PDA. Enjoy!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,325 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/23/2011 - Q. Quirrell, Voldemort - Complete
A Salty Conundrum by Saltwater reviews
“Excuse me,” came a rather reasonable voice from the back of the bunch “Might we move past all this obligatory yelling and get straight to business? I’ve had a long day.” Shameless self-insertion; horrific character mangling; torture. I make no apologies
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,706 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 5/18/2011 - Published: 2/26/2010 - Legolas, Aragorn
Deny Me by hllothere reviews
Harry was never one to deny Draco, but when it matters most, he refuses to listen to Draco's pleas and makes a life-altering decision. Oneshot. Melissa's first attempt at angst.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 797 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/10/2011 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
A Mirkwood Spider Landed On My Front Porch by Nieriel Raina reviews
A True Story. What happens when creatures and people from Middle-earth move in? Your life is NEVER the same. Spiders on the porch? Elves in the closet? A dwarf in the kitchen? Welcome to my life... 2nd Place 2011 MEFA Humor: Comedy/Drama
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,506 - Reviews: 144 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 5/8/2011 - Published: 7/3/2009 - Legolas, Glorfindel - Complete
Therapy by ThisMortalCoil reviews
In which General Grievous teaches a therapy class, Palpatine is a stalker, Anakin plays poker, Obi-Wan always needs to be rescued, and a smart aleck juvenile delinquent causes pure chaos!
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 36 - Words: 60,264 - Reviews: 550 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 5/6/2011 - Published: 8/29/2009 - Obi-Wan K., E. Palpatine - Complete
Lively Up Yourself by forginsberg reviews
Lovely femslash Hermione/Pansy pairing. Pansy is a master of potions, supplying the druggie underground at Hogwarts. A small curiosity concerning the contents of a prim prefect's skirt leads to a whole new world; but what goes up must come down.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 9 - Words: 15,004 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 5/6/2011 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Hermione G., Pansy P.
Our Daughter Our Little Angel by T.RxD reviews
Dimitri takes Tasha's offer right after the battle at the Academy. Little did he know he was leaving much more than a heartbroken Rose...9 months later Rose gave birth to her little angel. What happens when Dimitri returns four years later?
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 35 - Words: 127,334 - Reviews: 1848 - Favs: 894 - Follows: 805 - Updated: 4/30/2011 - Published: 5/8/2010 - Rose H., Dimitri B.
The Prank War by Caunedhiel reviews
Legolas has finally snapped. Elladan and Elrohir's pranks have to be revenged. When Glorfindel, Erestor and Legolas team up things can get a bit messy! AU ! Beta: Legolas Thranduilion
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,916 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 4/24/2011 - Published: 6/24/2010 - Legolas, Elrohir
Assumptions and miscommunication by bflahavin reviews
Kirk finds out he is pregnant and is afraid to tell Spock because he believes his Vulcan lover is already thinking of leaving him.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,224 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 240 - Follows: 19 - Published: 4/19/2011 - Spock, J. Kirk - Complete
Play Your Cards Right by RamenThief reviews
Prussia suggests a dangerous game or will both Russia and Prussia discover a hidden emotion for each other, just by a turn of Stip Poker. Will a loss of a deal of cards and a clothing article bring these friends closer? Dedicated to Spac3 M0nk3y!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,401 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/22/2011 - Russia, Prussia - Complete
Tangible Memories by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Legolas must make the difficult decision of what to take with him when he sails into the West. 2011 MEFA Nominee
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,417 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/18/2011 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
Breaking Dawn 2 by GC20 reviews
what happened after breaking dawn...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 40 - Words: 25,492 - Reviews: 368 - Favs: 260 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 1/15/2011 - Published: 1/25/2009 - Bella, Edward
The Facts of Life by exiled mind reviews
Joanna McCoy has a new baby brother, and that leads to questions that Leonard isn't quite ready for. Jim is, of course, no help at all. Warning: vague reference to mpreg A ficlet from LJ's Bridge2sickbay drabble community. This week's theme: New
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 296 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/3/2011 - L. McCoy/Bones, J. Kirk - Complete
Four Sandwiches by SkyIam reviews
Jim is pregnant and hungry. In the middle of the night. Kirk/Spock slash, Mpreg.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 385 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 8 - Published: 12/27/2010 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
Nine Months by lulu halulu reviews
Annabeth finds out that she's pregnant. How will Percy deal with his super-scary demi-god wife? This is the life of Percy and Annabeth through the nine months that she's pregnant. Percabeth PercyxAnnabeth, ChrisxClarisse and slight GroverxJuniper
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 27,013 - Reviews: 704 - Favs: 381 - Follows: 320 - Updated: 12/25/2010 - Published: 12/11/2009 - Percy J., Annabeth C.
Dorm Ride by nightwings93 reviews
In order to escape her past, Max gets accepted to her college of choice. Only there's a catch: she has to live in the ALL BOYS dorm! What happens when she meets Fang, the pyrotwins Iggy&Gazzy, and a whole horde of other hot guys? All Human
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 60 - Words: 141,577 - Reviews: 3570 - Favs: 1,017 - Follows: 548 - Updated: 12/22/2010 - Published: 11/11/2009 - Complete
Master And Slave by QueenOfTheYaoi reviews
Francis wakes up in Ivan's bedroom. Hardcore smut and yaoi. Giftfic for ShadowTheHedgehog's Wifey. Warning: Very dirty!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,697 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 11 - Published: 11/18/2010 - Russia, France - Complete
Randomness, Jedi Knights and Sith Lords by Tamawen reviews
Randomness with your favorite star wars characters.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 6,449 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 10/29/2010 - Published: 12/21/2009 - Luke S., Darth Vader
The Price of Hatred! by Jessarie reviews
Harry & Draco/ M-M/ What really is the price of hatred? Will Harry and Draco find out?/ Please Review!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,640 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 8 - Published: 10/26/2010 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Going Down by madfoxzz reviews
Abby and Ziva are stuck in the elevator, what to do...
NCIS - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,795 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 5 - Published: 10/11/2010 - Abby S., Ziva D. - Complete
How To Torture A DemiGod by LemonStickInsect reviews
A simple story on torturing your favorite Characters
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,200 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 10/7/2010 - Published: 8/19/2010
Breaking the Ice by Geeky-DMHG-Fan reviews
EWE. DMHG. One-shot. Eight months after graduation, Hermione runs into Draco in the middle of nowhere. Needless to say, there is lots they need to catch up on.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,070 - Reviews: 107 - Favs: 463 - Follows: 30 - Published: 8/18/2010 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Aro's Advice by Amarwen reviews
Aro writes an advice column with the help of a vampire called Amarwen and the Volturi.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 9,203 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 8/17/2010 - Published: 10/3/2009 - Aro
Muinthel, Maethor, Mellon by Kaisaan Greenleaf reviews
Kaia lives in Rohan with her family. Her life is relatively normal and without change until she meets him a stallion as dark as night with an extraordinary gift. Now with war from Isengard threatening - FULL SUMMARY INSIDE!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 158,555 - Reviews: 204 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 7/22/2010 - Published: 2/26/2009 - Elrohir, Legolas - Complete
Trenern Thint o Ennorath by Nieriel Raina reviews
Short Accounts of Middle-earth: A collection of drabbles and double drabbles as counted by MS WORD, focusing on various characters in Tolkien's legendarium.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 29 - Words: 4,385 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 7/11/2010 - Published: 9/7/2009
Conquest by tinuelena reviews
Chekov? Not as innocent as he seems. It's an act... that gets him laid. Now he's set his sights on Kirk. Fill for cracky kink meme prompt.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,742 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 11 - Published: 7/9/2010 - J. Kirk, P. Chekov - Complete
Powers Divided by iamwallflowerxx reviews
Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase... baby? The powers of the sea god and the goddess of wisom... WOW. PS: NO FREAKING FLAMES. LOVE YOU ALL!
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 28,029 - Reviews: 561 - Favs: 213 - Follows: 130 - Updated: 7/1/2010 - Published: 2/25/2010 - Percy J., Annabeth C. - Complete
Potter to Potter by StormyFireDragon reviews
The sequel of For Love of a Slytherin. Harry and Draco arrived home from their honeymoon in Niagara Falls. They were happy and blissful, basking in the brightness that was in their hearts. The Dark Forces are on the move. With a new enemy, can the love they have survive? SLASH Draco and Harry. Don't like same sex pairings, don't read.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 97,343 - Reviews: 165 - Favs: 226 - Follows: 88 - Updated: 6/29/2010 - Published: 5/17/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Randomness on the Death Star by Amarwen reviews
Evil groups, IMing, lost teddybears, fear of pitchforks and wooden stakes. Lets just say the Death Star will never be the same again.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,664 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 6/19/2010 - Published: 12/10/2009 - Obi-Wan K., Darth Vader
Target Area by izzylane reviews
On the massage table in the locker room after Chekov has been taking fencing lessons from Sulu...
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,020 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 7 - Published: 5/31/2010 - P. Chekov, H. Sulu - Complete
Of Wizards and Elflings by TheSoliloquy reviews
Gandalf Greyhame, powerful istar, wise wizard, would always be reduced to childish play by a certain little Elfling... Four oneshots, from birth, to storytelling, to giggling, to comforting.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,959 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 5/25/2010 - Published: 10/24/2009 - Gandalf, Legolas
For Love of a Slytherin by StormyFireDragon reviews
The battle in the Department of Mysteries is over. Harry receives his inheritance and things change rapidly for him. Love appears to him with the most unlikely of person. The forces of light must prove love conquers all. SLASH HP/DM
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 107,678 - Reviews: 238 - Favs: 526 - Follows: 153 - Updated: 5/16/2010 - Published: 4/5/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Forest Assault by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Ten years post RotK. As Thranduil makes his way south past the Mountains of Mirkwood, he is attacked and must deal with the culprits.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 965 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/11/2010 - Thranduil - Complete
From The Shower to Middle Earth by Lammstrellicon reviews
A series of one shots where a girl goes from her shower to Middle-Earth and meets The Fellowship. Alya Thranduiliell is my Co-writer she writes some and I write some.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,123 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 5/10/2010 - Published: 5/1/2010 - Legolas
In Good Company by Nieriel Raina reviews
Boromir observes his strange companions as they set out on their journey.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 691 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Boromir - Complete
Where Once My Enemy Stood by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Thranduil contemplates his enemy... 1st Place Races: Elves: Fixed Length Ficlet 2007 MEFA
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 555 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 8 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Thranduil, Gimli - Complete
Hold To Hope by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Dispairing news often brings fear...but it is how we respond that counts.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 824 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Thranduil, Legolas - Complete
Whatever Harm Encroached by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: A hunter searches for his prey in the frozen forest of Mirkwood during the Long Winter of 2759.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 779 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Thranduil, Legolas - Complete
The Water's Song by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Thranduil spends a day in the wood with his wife and youngest child, but something happens that is unexpected and not forgotten. THIRD PLACE March Teitho 2007 Teitho Contest - 'Glimpse of the Future'
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,932 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Thranduil, Legolas - Complete
Transformed by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Thranduil takes his wife to their new home in northern Greenwood with a plan in mind that will change their lives.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 937 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Thranduil - Complete
Home For An Elvenking by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: With the Shadow turning Greenwood to Mirkwood, Thranduil must relocate his people from the Mountains to a new home.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 996 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Thranduil, Legolas - Complete
Let Me Be Your Strength by Nieriel Raina reviews
When Elrond arrives on Tol Eressëa, he finds healing for the bitter wounds in his heart.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 732 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/9/2010 - Elrond, Celebrian - Complete
This Side of Paradise by Nieriel Raina reviews
Aragorn finds nothing is simple about a simple bath. Arwen discovers lending a helping hand has unexpected rewards. Too bad there's an evil Ring to be destroyed and an overprotective father in Imladris. 2010 MEFA Nominee
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,984 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 5/2/2010 - Published: 12/6/2009 - Aragorn, Arwen U. - Complete
Triple Trouble by DaCloak reviews
3 teenagers get in trouble and get sent to Middle Earth for punishment. But what happens turns out to be punishment for others when they join the Fellowship. *DISCONTINUED AND WILL POSSIBLY REWRITE AT LATER DATE*
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,752 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 8 - Published: 4/23/2010 - Legolas, Aragorn
Where Is It? by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Year 1111 of the Third Age. Something is missing. Young Legolas is suspected of taking it. His siblings are sent to bring him to the king...will what was taken ever be found? Now completely edited and expanded!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,829 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 4/21/2010 - Published: 5/14/2007 - Thranduil, Legolas - Complete
Good Morning, Pasha by Lyricoloratura reviews
Let's just say that Pavel discovers that Hikaru is the world's most awesome alarm clock. Set after Chapter 12 of "Sestina," but can also stand alone. Please note "M" rating!
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,353 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 12 - Published: 4/14/2010 - P. Chekov, H. Sulu - Complete
Stuck in Middle earth! by shadow08 reviews
middle earth was one place that Sam & Tasha, best friends, had only dreamed of. what happens when they are suddenly dropped down to the place they thought didn't exist? what spills and thrills are abound for them? now updated!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 46 - Words: 138,706 - Reviews: 490 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 4/13/2010 - Published: 5/3/2005
Percy and Annabeth's new Journey by Goddess of Flight reviews
One night can make a difference,Annabeth has a secret that she needs to tell Pecry before he goes off on a quest.Will their mistake become the best thing ever for them or a regret? If you don't like....DON'T READ IT!
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 2,428 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 4/10/2010 - Published: 8/29/2009 - Percy J., Annabeth C.
GILBERT BEILSCHMIDT: User Guide and Manual by 0ptimuspenguin reviews
CONGRATULATIONS! You have just purchased a GILBERT BEILSCHMIDT unit! We have provided this manual, in order to ensure that you, the owner, make the most of your unit...
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,405 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 426 - Follows: 29 - Published: 4/1/2010 - Prussia - Complete
An Adventure to be Determined by VAM-Ninja reviews
The fellowship has a few more members... Get ready to rumble! Action! Humor! and Romance? Why are there so many doors in Elrond's house? Why can Elrond never finish a meal? All of this and more! ReadxReview please Legolas x OC; Pippin x OC; Frodo x OC
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 26,915 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 3/21/2010 - Published: 10/25/2009 - Frodo B., Legolas - Complete
Before the Storm by Jedi Sapphire reviews
One day in Rivendell, before the Nine Walkers begin their quest, Aragorn attempts to lighten the mood.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,464 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 196 - Follows: 16 - Published: 3/19/2010 - Aragorn, Legolas, Elrohir, Glorfindel - Complete
Freedom Is Never Free by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Freedom is not free. Aragorn remembers how he has learned that painful lesson over the course of his life. 1st Place January 2010 Teitho Contest. 2010 MEFA Nominee.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,500 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 13 - Published: 2/17/2010 - Aragorn, Eldarion - Complete
By the Grey Light of Dawn by Nieriel Raina reviews
The day Fingolfin rode out to face Morgoth, from the perspective of one close to him. Written for Sanna for the Probably AU GenFic swap. 2010 MEFA Nominee
Silmarillion - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,553 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 2 - Published: 2/14/2010 - Complete
The Son of Gloin by Nieriel Raina reviews
Gloin had known it was not a good idea to let Gimli go on the Quest, but never had he imagined it would come to this. A tale of the Fellowship and of the forming of the friendship between Legolas and Gimli...with a slight twist. AU 1st Place August ALEC
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 13,569 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 2/11/2010 - Published: 9/30/2009 - Gimli, Legolas - Complete
Stepping Up by ExpandingDarkness reviews
When Pavel's boyfriend leaves him pregnant, Bones steps up and eventually falls in love with Pavel. Mpreg. Short story. McCoy/Chekov.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 770 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/26/2010 - P. Chekov, L. McCoy/Bones - Complete
Step Over The Edge by Captain Ronnie reviews
Chekov shows up late one day, then not at all the next day for his shift. Spock was sent to find him, and the captain asked him to get to the bottom of things.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,541 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 1/21/2010 - Published: 1/3/2010 - P. Chekov, Spock - Complete
A Good Thing by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Legolas visits the Lonely Mountain for the first time and is surprised by what he finds.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 874 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 23 - Published: 1/17/2010 - Gimli, Legolas - Complete
The Last Gift by Nieriel Raina reviews
Elrond had given him many gifts over the course of his life. Looking back, Aragorn remembers… 1st Place December 2009 Teitho Contest 'Giving Gifts, Receiving Gifts' 2010 MEFA Nominee
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,622 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/17/2010 - Aragorn, Elrond - Complete
The Trees Were Burning by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Blákári, a young dwarf of Erebor and a messenger to Mirkwood, is forced to join in a battle that is not his and to fight alongside a race he has been taught to despise. A birthday gift for Thundera Tiger. Full summary inside. 2010 MEFA Nominee
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,041 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 1/17/2010 - Published: 11/19/2009 - Thranduil - Complete
Affliction's Sons by Stella Andrea reviews
There's been an outbreak on New Vulcan: Vulcan men of all ages are going through Pon Farr years earlier than expected. Kirk/Spock, complete, slash
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 68,271 - Reviews: 136 - Favs: 550 - Follows: 106 - Updated: 1/13/2010 - Published: 1/1/2010 - Spock, J. Kirk - Complete
A Song That Was by Nieriel Raina reviews
Legolas attempts to come to terms with the death of Gimli. 1st Place 2009 Middle-earth Fanfiction Awards Genres: Character Study: Angst
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Angst/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,014 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 33 - Published: 1/3/2010 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
All I Want for Christmas is You by AnneM.Oliver reviews
All Draco wants for Christmas is Hermione, and he only has twelve days to prove it, and he'll do it one day at a time. New Year's Eve epilogue added!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 38,601 - Reviews: 684 - Favs: 770 - Follows: 203 - Updated: 1/1/2010 - Published: 11/29/2009 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Silver Bells by Nieriel Raina reviews
A grieving Elrond determines to skip Gift Night, not realizing how much he is needed, especially when it comes to his devastated sons. When a mysterious trunk is uncovered, the contents help return hope to the Elrond's family. 2010 MEFA Nominee
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,275 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/21/2009 - Elrond, Erestor - Complete
I Do Not Cuddle, Dammit! by Shattered Mirror01 reviews
McCoy wanders into Chekov's room after a long day looking for comfort... and sex. Chekov, however, has other ideas. McCoy/Chekov, rated M for language and sexual content.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,059 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 7 - Published: 12/19/2009 - L. McCoy/Bones, P. Chekov - Complete
Gives You Hell by Shattered Mirror01 reviews
Dr. McCoy stared down at an impatient, half-naked Pavel Chekov. 'I'm gonna go to hell for this.' McCoy/Chekov, rated M for safety.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,200 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 11 - Published: 11/27/2009 - L. McCoy/Bones, P. Chekov - Complete
There's No Knowing Where You Might Be Swept Off To by Nieriel Raina reviews
A collection of unrelated, stand alone fics that don't seem to belong anywhere else. These short stories are unrelated to any of my series.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 8,028 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 10 - Published: 11/22/2009
I Picture Your Smile by VergofTowels reviews
Kirk finds a surprising file on Spock's computer. K/S fluff. Mentioned mpreg.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 445 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 10 - Published: 11/20/2009 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
In This Together by VulcanCheesecake reviews
Kirk/Chekov. They get captured by the Romulans and tortured. Theres something between them, but they're pushed to the limit. Can get through it, together? Angst, hurt/comfort, and plenty of manlove!
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,274 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 35 - Published: 10/29/2009 - J. Kirk, P. Chekov
The Forest Maiden's View by Nieriel Raina reviews
Does it really matter if I admire him' she wondered. 'I know he'd never look twice at me.' One maid watches, unknowing she is watched in return. Haldir/OFC
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,119 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 22 - Published: 8/30/2009 - Haldir - Complete
One Dirty Word by heroes-explosion reviews
Chekov says a bad word, and McCoy uses that as an excuse to punish the young man. Warnings: Male-male sex, spanking, graphic, very kinky
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,438 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 9 - Published: 8/26/2009 - P. Chekov, L. McCoy/Bones
Saying Sorry by GESTALTminds reviews
We all need somebody to lean on, even Spock.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,944 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/14/2009 - P. Chekov, Spock - Complete
50 Things Bella Cullen is not Allowed to do by The Real Emmett Cullen reviews
Like the tile says.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,025 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 7 - Published: 8/10/2009 - Bella - Complete
Some Things Never Change by Nieriel Raina reviews
Elven men go through a final stage of development, but for Aaron Rivers, aka Thranduil, the change comes as a surprise, for he has always considered such things to be a myth. Set in Jael's Not Fade Away verse and posted with permission.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,564 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/22/2009 - Thranduil, Legolas - Complete
Dating the Captain by twistyguru reviews
Pavel Chekov worries too much. WARNING: M/M SLASH! Kirk/Chekov, implied Spock/Uhura. No spoilers, just a silly little piece of romantic fluff from the POV of a certain neurotic young Russian ensign who's in love with his Captain. One-Shot.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,806 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 22 - Published: 7/5/2009 - P. Chekov, J. Kirk - Complete
The Last Green Leaf by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Immortal life is not granted to all, and death oft comes sooner than anticipated. But even in death, a legacy lives on. A look at the friendship of Aragorn and Legolas from the perspective of an unusual source - a dying oak tree.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,904 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 6/23/2009 - Published: 6/18/2009 - Legolas, Aragorn - Complete
Forever Changed by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Once a man loses use of his legs, he's of little use to anyone. Or is he? Can one ex-soldier find hope in the crowd as the king passes by? 2009 Middle-earth Fanfiction Awards Nominee
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,657 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/22/2009 - Aragorn, Faramir - Complete
Cheater, Cheater by greenconverses reviews
In which Percy joins the Goode High School swim team, Annabeth continues to not make things easy for him, and underwater kissing is involved. Again. Post-TLO, Percy/Annabeth fluff.
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,137 - Reviews: 271 - Favs: 1,272 - Follows: 173 - Published: 6/19/2009 - Percy J., Annabeth C. - Complete
A Dark Shadow Under The Moon by Nieriel Raina reviews
"…In the days of June, sudden war came upon us out of Mordor, and we were swept away." An expansion of Boromir's account of the attack on Osgiliath as told during the Council of Elrond. Bookverse.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,034 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 7 - Published: 6/13/2009 - Boromir, Faramir - Complete
SOS by Lady.Bronte reviews
Jim, remind me again, why exactly are you wearing leopard underwear and singing Dancing Queen?"
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,718 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/9/2009 - J. Kirk, P. Chekov - Complete
Tracking Monsters by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Legolas searches out a new and possibly evil creature in Ithilien. A companion fic to Uncharacteristic Fury.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,370 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Published: 5/31/2009 - Legolas - Complete
Uncharacteristic Fury by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Eowyn returns from helping an injured man to find her husband is furious with her, and for good reason. A Birthday fic for Raksha the Demon.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,394 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/31/2009 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
Seemingly Forbidding Crags by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: An Elf wakes to excessive heat and pain and finds himself in the clutches of a vile enemy! Or is all as it seems? A sequel to Never Again.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,842 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 5/29/2009 - Published: 11/27/2007 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
Darkest Before Dawn by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: What gave Aragorn such strength of will to go boldly into the Paths of the Dead, seemingly fearless in the face of such evil – even when the lights go out? Bookverse.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,100 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/29/2009 - Aragorn, Legolas - Complete
Follow The Sun by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Legolas faces the darkest night of his life – and the death of a close friend. Honorable Mention 2009 Middle-earth Fanfiction Awards Genres: Character Study: Final Partings
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,535 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/29/2009 - Legolas, Aragorn - Complete
The Gift by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Legolas receives a surprise visitor, and learns some disturbing news.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,301 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/29/2009 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
As Was Dwarven Tradition by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Gimli celebrates his two hundredth birthday, one of the most important days of a dwarf's life. But someone is missing. Written for the TTT prompt #11: Birthday. 3RD PLACE 2008 Middle-earth Fanficion Awards: Dwarves: General
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 910 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/29/2009 - Gimli, Legolas - Complete
Deadly Was the Wrath of the Hands That Held Them by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: "You are more worthy to wear the armour of elf-princes than many that have looked more comely in it." That was what his father told Mr. Bilbo Baggins. Legolas at the Battle of Five Armies.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,517 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 50 - Published: 5/9/2009 - Complete
61 Things Alice Cullen is not Allowed to Do by The Real Emmett Cullen reviews
61 Things Alice Cullen is not Allowed to Do.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,322 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 11 - Published: 5/6/2009 - Alice - Complete
Best By Far by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Escaping the celebrations of Legolas's second millennium, the elf and Gimli discuss women, swords and begetting day gifts.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,640 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/5/2009 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
A Trickle of Green Ribbon by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: When Sam and Rosie visit Minas Tirith they also bring four-year-old Ruby. But Ruby disappears and it's up to a certain elf to find the child who has longed to meet him. Slightly AU. Honorable Mention 2009 MEFA Genres: Character Study: General
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,621 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 7 - Published: 5/3/2009 - Legolas, Samwise G. - Complete
What's For Dinner? by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: He always knew wood-elves were strange. Will their outlandish customs prove too much for a stout dwarf like Gimli? 2ND PLACE March 2009 Teitho Contest; 2ND PLACE 2009 MEFA Genres: Character Study: Friendship
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,737 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/18/2009 - Gimli, Legolas - Complete
Harry Potter And The MiddleEarthians by Paige Darke reviews
Kayli's back. Well, she never really left. What happens when you mix an Elf, a confused human girl, a castleful of wizard students, and a war against a Dark Lord? The usual. Sequel to EHMSOH! Crossover with HP.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 22 - Words: 54,954 - Reviews: 309 - Favs: 129 - Follows: 120 - Updated: 4/3/2009 - Published: 2/2/2005 - Legolas, Elrohir
10 Years Later by Piper Elizabeth reviews
10 years after the final battle at Camp Half-blood, Percy is dealing with the death of Annabeth. But what happens when he finds out that everything he thought was true isn’t? Percabeth
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 23 - Words: 48,351 - Reviews: 776 - Favs: 522 - Follows: 150 - Updated: 2/24/2009 - Published: 12/21/2008 - Annabeth C., Percy J. - Complete
Fungal Follies by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Hobbits seem to be quite taken with mushrooms, but not everyone they come into contact with concurs, as Pippin finds out during the Quest in Taste the Fungus and again after the War in Feast on Mushrooms. A pair of related fics
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,052 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 12 - Published: 2/21/2009 - Peregrin T., Aragorn - Complete
Golden Lord of Gondolin by Nieriel Raina reviews
A collection of vignettes centering on Glorfindel and his life in Imladris, especially his relationship to Aragorn/Estel.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,389 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/21/2009 - Glorfindel, Erestor - Complete
Half Lidded Eyes by Evie Antorcha reviews
Kyle would do anything to protect the life of the one he loves, and Cartman takes full advantage of knowing that fact. Slash
South Park - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 18,507 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 1/6/2009 - Published: 8/16/2008 - Kyle B., Kenny M.
A secret romance by Caneater reviews
What really happens when Hermione is left all alone while Harry and Ron go on adventures? A Draco/Hermione canon-fic. R R please!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 10,787 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 12/3/2008 - Published: 1/20/2008 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
101 things Draco Malfoy wishes He'd never seen by quik-wit reviews
And 3 that thrilled him to no end! DMHG
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,782 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 106 - Follows: 14 - Published: 10/2/2008 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
New world by Irais reviews
Aremi is an average teenager,who just happened to be sucked into ME. Instead of worrying about zits and homework like a normal teen she has to worry about the fate of Middle Earth and staying alive.If that isnt enough,love is knocking at her door.MarySue
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 49 - Words: 87,882 - Reviews: 480 - Favs: 195 - Follows: 120 - Updated: 8/24/2008 - Published: 12/2/2004 - Legolas
Fulfilling Oaths by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Finrod doubts his strength at Tol-in-Gaurhoth. After his death, Beren considers the Ring of Felagund and it is passed down until a mysterious messenger arrives in Aman. LOTR/Silm 3RD PLACE 2008 MEFA Times: Multi-age: General
Crossover - Lord of the Rings & Silmarillion - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,923 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/17/2008 - Complete
Just the truth by pokari reviews
(H/D) Malfoys are nice?! Harry got pregnant
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 67,953 - Reviews: 396 - Favs: 507 - Follows: 331 - Updated: 1/27/2008 - Published: 2/1/2003 - Draco M., Harry P.
Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It SNOW! by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Spring in Imladris? Autumn in Eriador? Summer in Ithilien? What has this to do with Yule? And why is everyone confessing? Starring Glorfindel, Aragorn and Legolas. With Elrond, Erestor, and Gimli
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,788 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 12/25/2007 - Published: 12/20/2007 - Glorfindel, Legolas - Complete
Missing by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Aragorn wakes to a promising day, but as soon as he gets out of bed, trouble looms. His wife is missing! Prepared for danger, he and Legolas must do all in their power to solve the mystery. Failure is not an option!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Mystery/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,792 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 10 - Published: 11/14/2007 - Legolas, Aragorn - Complete
Ghosts and Ghouls by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: During their travels, Legolas and Gimli encounter a village with some beliefs the dwarf has never encountered before. Legolas enlightens him.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,087 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/31/2007 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
A Torturous Predicament Called ‘Entertainment’ by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: A delegation from Gondor to Harad get more than they bargained for in the way of entertainment. Written for the Middle-earth Express Prompt 84: Entertainment. 2ND PLACE 2007 MC Awards - Biggest Laughter Story.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,753 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 10/20/2007 - Published: 9/30/2007 - Legolas, Aragorn - Complete
Of Fillies And Kings by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Alone I watch, never seen, a stranger in a strange land, observing those who are now my people.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,255 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/16/2007 - Lothíriel, Eomer - Complete
Dance of the Deer and Mûmak by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: By all that is stone, how did he talk me into this, a dwarf at an elvish merry making? Written for the ME Express Prompt 82: Music. 1ST PLACE 2007 MC Awards - Best Legolas Fun
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,930 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/16/2007 - Gimli, Legolas - Complete
Undaunted by Nieriel Raina reviews
When Glorfindel is once again late for a meeting, Erestor sends a determined escort to see he arrives promptly and attired appropriately.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,076 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/26/2007 - Aragorn, Glorfindel - Complete
Ripples by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Ripples... Once started, you never know where they will end. In Aman, a lady speaks with an elf about a maiden of Middle-earth, and how her choice affected all. 2ND PLACE July 2007 Teitho Contest
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,021 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/16/2007 - Legolas - Complete
In Hot Water by Nieriel Raina reviews
After walking and fighting for days, Legolas and Gimli finally find some respite some time after the Battle of Pelennor Fields. Unrelated to any series or other story.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,204 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/15/2007 - Published: 8/13/2007 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
A Successful Attempt by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: After the loss of Gandalf in Moria, can an elf and dwarf put aside their differences and attempt to be friends? Written for the Middleearth Express Prompt: 76 Attempt. Companion to Offering Nothing More Than Tears
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,874 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/8/2007 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
To Represent the Elves by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: As the Nine Walkers travel south, two members of the Fellowship become better acquainted. A birthday fic for Wimsey1. HONORABLE MENTION 2007 Middle-earth Fanfiction Awards Genres: Humor: General
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,434 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/30/2007 - Legolas, Peregrin T. - Complete
Morndel by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Gimli finds himself in a most unlikely location thanks to Eldarion's gift from the Haradrim Ambassador, much to Legolas's amusement. 1ST PLACE May 2007 Teitho Contest; 1ST PLACE 2007 MC Awards Best Friendship; 2009 MEFA Nominee
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,968 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 39 - Published: 6/13/2007 - Gimli, Eldarion - Complete
Deeper and Richer by Nieriel Raina reviews
An elf visits his friend's home for the first time. The catch? His friend is a dwarf! Written for the Middleearth Express Prompt 68: Colour. Edited.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,097 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/10/2007 - Complete
Ease My Heart by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Sometimes those who affect our lives so greatly are those who are silent. And we never forget them. Sequel to I Am of the House of Eorl.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,087 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/31/2007 - Eowyn, Legolas - Complete
Never, In All My Days by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: A trip to Imladris is not everything Legolas expects it to be when he meets Lord Elrond's foster son, four year old Estel.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,350 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 1/11/2007 - Published: 11/13/2006 - Legolas, Glorfindel - Complete
The End by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: The time had come at last…it was the end. The end of Arda and the fate of the elves.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 991 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/17/2006 - Legolas, Aragorn - Complete
Birthday Celebrations by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: It is the first of March and the White City is celebrating the birthday of King Elessar! But festivities sometimes do not go as planned...Will Legolas survive the night?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 14,594 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 12/7/2006 - Published: 10/25/2006 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
I Am Of The House Of Eorl by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: When the Three Hunters and Gandalf come to Edoras, history is made, events are set in motion and some will never be the same… A look at the events from an unusual perspective...that of a wolfhound.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,938 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 14 - Published: 11/11/2006 - Eowyn, Legolas - Complete
Every Year On The First Day Of March by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Many years after the death of King Elessar, some still remember… 3RD PLACE 2006 September Teitho Contest.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,446 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/12/2006 - Elrond, Legolas - Complete
Instruction In Youth by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: The Prince of Mirkwood takes on a dubious task…instructing a young Estel about life from the elvish proverbs.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,591 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/10/2006 - Legolas, Aragorn - Complete
Offering Nothing More Than Tears by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: Upon receiving word that Gimli's mother has only a short time to live, Legolas races to Erebor to offer what comfort he can. 1ST PLACE 2006 MC Awards - Best Friendship Story. Revised 7/29/09
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,447 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/18/2006 - Legolas, Gimli - Complete
Catching A Steward Off His Guard by Nieriel Raina reviews
UFS: The complete story of Faramir's unfortunate inability to keep on his guard at all times as referenced in the story Never Again. Completely revised to fit with Birthday Celebrations! Worth a reread!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,849 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 19 - Published: 5/22/2006 - Faramir, Eowyn - Complete
You can't run from everything by ElvenPrincessSapphire reviews
I erased the old story You can't run From Everything and started a new one, it will have the same plot but i didn't like the way the chapters were going so here it it. review please
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Adventure - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,272 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 11/25/2005 - Published: 7/3/2005 - Legolas, Haldir
Broken by ElvenPrincessSapphire reviews
Sapphire runs away with a plan for fame, but what she dosen't expect is that she ends up somewhere in Middle Earth with the fellowship and an extreamly annoying elf. And to make things worse she's forgetting the plot!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 11,049 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 7/7/2005 - Published: 7/22/2004 - Legolas
Haldir's Here by Jedi Gollum reviews
COMPLETED (160) ! King Thranduil chooses Haldir to come from Lorien to baby-sit a small elfling named Legolas. Will Haldir return to Lorien in one piece?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 160 - Words: 144,934 - Reviews: 733 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 2/28/2005 - Published: 8/2/2004 - Legolas, Haldir - Complete
Elves, Hobbits, & MarySues, Oh My! by Paige Darke reviews
COMPLETE! A teenage girl is dropped into Middle-Earth. She finds herself the prisoner of a pair of Mary-Sues, with a complete lack of modern conveniences, reading material in ENGLISH, and everything she knows. And she most DEFINITELY does NOT want to be t
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 56 - Words: 97,570 - Reviews: 664 - Favs: 394 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 1/29/2005 - Published: 8/3/2003 - Complete
Lord of The Thighs They Lived Happily Ever After? by suziefox reviews
Chapter 4 Up! Sequel to I'm Your Fella, Cinderella. Trouble brews in Middle Earth. Join Legolas, Kalia, Haldir, and Tyrael as they cope with marriage, friendship, and The One Ring.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 20,092 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 7/10/2004 - Published: 12/15/2003 - Legolas, Haldir
Alfonso the Ring by RiseAgainPhoenix reviews
The LOTR trilogy, seen through the eyes of the most important character---Mr. One Ring himself! (Beware! Ring has a snarky attitude, this is rated for coarse language & maybe slash) Last chapter up!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 31 - Words: 43,059 - Reviews: 238 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 6/30/2004 - Published: 1/15/2003
All I Want for Christmas by WretchedWriter reviews
Oh dear, Harry & Draco shared one fight too many. So what's in store for them if not a stocking full of coal on this Christmas Eve?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,610 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/11/2004 - Draco M., Harry P.
I'm your Fella, Cinderella by suziefox reviews
Chapter 14 Up! The cake is made and the flowers are ready! Let the wedding begin! But, trouble is brewing in Middle Earth, what will befall our crazy quartet?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 108,964 - Reviews: 230 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 12/14/2003 - Published: 9/8/2003 - Legolas, Haldir
Lord of the Rings: The Untold Story by Beth Nolan reviews
THERE WERE 10 COMPANIONS, NOT NINE...AND ONE WAS A WOMAN!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,326 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 10/1/2003 - Published: 9/19/2003 - Legolas
After All These Years by Paige Darke reviews
Despair. A past. Is there hope. Serious fic. Since I believe you can't be three thousand years old and never have fallen in love. L/OC NOT A MARY-SUE!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 817 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/26/2003 - Complete
Harry Potter & The Daughter of Malfoy by Fyrie reviews
Harry Potter gets in the way of a pregnancy potion meant for Narcissa Malfoy, leaving the boy-wonder pregnant. He's not best pleased! How is he meant to save the world from Voldemort when he has to go on maternity leave? (NOT slash - just silly) COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 10 - Words: 25,896 - Reviews: 366 - Favs: 458 - Follows: 69 - Published: 1/9/2003 - Complete
Welcome to My World by Azra reviews
Elves do exist, and some of them are living among us right now, disguised as mortal men and women. One of them faces the past she longs to forget when she is suddenly sucked back into the world of Elves, Hobbits, and Middle-earth: The Lord of the Rings mo
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,252 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 4/2/2002 - Published: 3/21/2002 - Legolas
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Beam Me Up reviews
Inspired by the song Beam Me Up by Pink. Pavel Chekov feels awful about the death of Spock's mother, now, he's just searching for the right words to say it. M for a reason. Yaoi. boyXboy. Swears. Smut. Consider yourself warned. Other parings: Kirk/Sulu
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,708 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 23 - Published: 11/12/2012 - P. Chekov, Spock
The Puppet Master
The power and fear of the Dark Lord Voldemort is rising,and the ministry must take drastic action. Their solution: Project Gemini. Pureblood children, taken from their families, their memories erased, never told who or what they are. DM/HP
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,499 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/2/2012 - Published: 3/28/2012 - Draco M., OC
The Tale of Two Hearts reviews
Two siblings. Two very different lives. One war that will ultimatly bring them together or tear them apart forever. One girl who determins the fate of it all. Two souls. One body. One last chance to make things right... but never has right felt so wrong.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 50,188 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 9/17/2011 - Published: 9/26/2010 - Legolas
What Happens in Wirrawee reviews
Set after Circle of Flight. Ellie thinks she has left the world of war behind her, but she is all too quickly about to find herself right in the middle of it.
The Tomorrow series - Rated: T - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 11 - Words: 14,120 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Updated: 6/10/2011 - Published: 4/5/2011 - Ellie L., Lee T. - Complete
The Adventure of Middle Earth reviews
On Katie's 17th she is sent to live with her aunt.She gets her life dream but when forced to chose between the life she left behind and the one she has dreamed of what will she chose?Who's heart will be broken? and will she find who she's been waiting for
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 62,667 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 9/16/2010 - Published: 4/28/2010 - Legolas - Complete