edgarallanpoet
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Joined 04-10-10, id: 2321805, Profile Updated: 04-27-10
Author has written 1 story for Twilight.

I was born in the deep south, Birmingham, Alabama to be exact. Although the south is in my bones, I did not live there for long and so I don't have an accent, for which I am grateful. I spent my childhood living in Florida and various cities in Europe. I have traveled quite a bit, but not enough for my taste. We first lived in Houten, Holland (in the province of Utrecht). Then, we lived for a few years in Pickliessem, Germany, a small farming town close to the Air Force base my father was stationed at, Spangdahlem. For a time, when I was sixteen, we also lived in Paris, France, a city that I love, despite most Americans' scorn. I dream of seeing Ireland, Scotland, Italy and Eastern Europe, especially Prague and Romania, and I want very much to live somewhere in the United Kingdom. I've misplaced most of my French, unfortunately. My father is a retired jet fighter pilot, of which I am very proud. Only a few people can brag about their dad being an aerial rock star. My mother evened the score, she is a bat shit crazy, Appalachian alcoholic and hypocritical bible thumper. She beats me with the Jesus stick all the time.

I myself was a veterinary technician for over ten years. I almost pursued an equine veterinary career, but thanks to my relationships with many veterinarians over the years, one an esteemed equine surgeon, I wizened up, realizing that as a 5' tall woman, I would probably break down physically before long, and veterinarians have to work much too hard for too little pay, and I don't like to work hard. Now I'm a published author, an artist, and a music journalist. I've interviewed all kinds of bands, big and small. If you're curious as to who, contact me.

I write fiction and poetry mostly, and some personal essays whenever the muse strikes me. And my muse does strike me, usually with a cane or a club. He looks like Russell Brand, except a bit more scuzzy and only almost as hilarious (of course, he only lives in my head). I'm working on my first novel (and have been for years, I've had a lot of emotional and physical set backs). It's about Rock n' Roll, love, hate, murder, death, rape, loss, addiction, fuckery, suicide, and redemption. Yes, I'm fitting all of that into one book. My favorite authors are Shakespeare, Janet Fitch and Louise Erdrich, and all of them have influence on my writing. I have two children from terrible, tumultuous relationships.

As far as my personal distractions, they are freeing the West Memphis Three, advocating for victims of domestic abuse, fighting for abused, neglected, and exploited animals, horses (especially Friesians, Holsteiners, Hanoverians, Irish Draughts, Gypsy Vanners, Trakehners, and most cold and warmbloods, sometimes Thoroughbreds if they aren't too squirrely, but Arabians are on my most hated list (blech)!, riding dressage and jumping (mentally choreographing freestyle dressage to Slayer) I started riding English in Holland and Germany at the age of eight and if I had had proper money, I would have gone far competitively, exotic dogs and cats (English Bulldogs, Neapolitan and English mastiffs, Cane Corsos, Irish Wolfhounds, West Highland Terriers, Cairn Terriers, Scottish Terriers), exotic accents, everything in and about the United Kingdom, especially the gorgeous, descriptive slang and profanity, but not chavs (the only aweshum chav is Vicky Pollard from "Little Britain" and yes, I can understand everything she says but please don't expect me to translate Glaswegian for you), New Orleans, London, Paris, fine art museums (especially the Louvre), Da Vinci, Rubens, Rembrandt, Parkes, Rodin, Bernini, & John William Waterhouse, the Pre-Raphaelite movement, chiaroscuro, Baroque, stained glass in Gothic churches, ancient cemeteries, tribal belly dance (Rachel Brice is my idol), guitar, music in most every form especially blues and rock n' roll (except for rap, cuntry, bubblegum pop, nihilistic & satanic black metal and all of the sub genres of that doo doo (Slayer is the one exception), and easy listening), sparklies, Christian Louboutin (I would so fuck a pair of his shoes), Alexander McQueen (God rest him), funky colored nail polish, piercings, and most recently, a profound, if one-sided relationship with Robert Pattinson. He is the first man who made my nose tingle and my teeth hurt just by looking at him. He turns my panties into dust. Not particularly because of just Twilight. I fell in love with his music first, and then everything else just fell on me. I would NEVER go to one of his appearances because I loathe the psychotic, gushy Twi-tards, and I wouldn't necessarily want to meet him in that sort of insane setting. I would not be opposed to having dinner with him and discussing blues, guitar, art, and books, though, if I could possibly keep my head about me.

I had never really read or got involved with fan fiction before meeting a few pervy, fuckawesome grrrls on facebook who publish Robporn. It's been a fast slide into the seedy underbelly of smut for me ever since. I really hope that you enjoy my work and go easy on me. Thanks for reading all of my blather and bleating!

I will be posting pertinent links for each story below. As far as music goes, I've set up a new youtube account and you can just hit it up to hear pertinent songs.

Can't Fight the Devil

Okay, I'll be updating my photobucket with pics as necessary so here's the link to the album itself and when i make a note that there's a new picture, it will be up! the couple of horses who've already been introduced (ten belles the bay Holsteiner mare and Ambisagrus the black Hanoverian stallion)... are up, and more to come...

http://s15.photobucket.com/albums/a354/feygrrrl/Fight20The20Devil/

AND here's the link to that specific required watching video for chapter 8, LOL no, it's not porn, unless you're me...

http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=QnNminLMFSM

Cougar's youtube.

if that link doesn't work for whatever reason, here it is in plain text.

http://www.youtube.com/user/DownCougar

Ahh, Charles Worth. God Rest You, you are still the best. eva.

Worth Images

http://entertainment.webshots.com/album/552257063QDTrFH

Worth History

http://www.metmuseum.org/toah/hd/wrth/hd_wrth.htm

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Dead Confederates by goldenmeadow reviews
Sultry, scary, Southern Gothic. A good ol' vamp with bad intentions, Eddie lives large as ever on the down-low, down South. Always under his skin, Bella's just sass in a frosty glass. **INSPIRED AWARDS WINNER Best Vampires & Best Bella** AU/M
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 38 - Words: 338,303 - Reviews: 1864 - Favs: 1,491 - Follows: 918 - Updated: 6/14/2013 - Published: 6/2/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Hit By Destiny by ocdmess reviews
Bella wants to die, and almost gets her wish fulfilled when she gets hit by a shiny Volvo. She is left with serious injuries, and the only thing keeping her from dying is the person who hit her. All Human, Rated M for language, dark themes & violence.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 59 - Words: 463,685 - Reviews: 19920 - Favs: 11,228 - Follows: 6,803 - Updated: 11/29/2012 - Published: 10/24/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Unbecoming by BookishQua reviews
In the aftermath of her divorce, a heartbroken Bella Swan looks for danger to give meaning to her life. If only her hot ex-husband would stay out of the picture. There is NO CHEATING in this story by E or B. AH BxE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 89,393 - Reviews: 2442 - Favs: 1,704 - Follows: 2,444 - Updated: 5/4/2012 - Published: 1/24/2012 - Bella, Edward
The Unaccompanied Soul by JMCullen09 reviews
An old, dilapidated hospital residing in the outskirts of Forks, WA sits untouched, yet it's the focus of many tales, including one of a young man who resides there. He's believed to be either ghost or murderer. But it's all just tales, right?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 152,637 - Reviews: 6014 - Favs: 4,370 - Follows: 4,313 - Updated: 2/5/2012 - Published: 2/14/2010 - Edward, Bella
Tomb Robber by queenxochitl reviews
A.Edward Masen searched the world for treasure. Isabella Swan might have called him a tomb robber once, but she was the greatest jewel he ever possesed. M for lemony decade's worth of cat-&-mouse. C. late 1800's Twilight/The Mummy/Indiana Jones AH/OOC.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 17 - Words: 68,916 - Reviews: 170 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 156 - Updated: 6/26/2011 - Published: 1/20/2010 - Edward, Bella
Daniel Gale: Cumming to America by Annetteskitty reviews
Nerdalicious Daniel Gale is saying goodbye to England and hello to the United States. Looking to reinvent himself, he is all too gratified by the corn-fed derriers of Americans. Daniel Gale/Twilight cross over, slightly crackfic, AU, AH, Prepare for Perv
Crossover - Twilight & Bad Mother's Handbook - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 27 - Words: 103,406 - Reviews: 4538 - Favs: 1,002 - Follows: 1,063 - Updated: 6/14/2011 - Published: 1/8/2010 - Bella
Love in My Box by cosmoandmarvar reviews
Bella's an intellectual free spirit and Edward is a reserved, slightly geeky med student. They have a brief, but intense encounter on Sp Brk in Miami. Can they find true love through emails? There will be lemons and laughs. Look who's writing this!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 147,894 - Reviews: 8784 - Favs: 5,392 - Follows: 3,810 - Updated: 1/29/2011 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
A Second Chance by Elliriel Galadh-Lithe reviews
An alternate ending to TSSLBT, SM's short novella on Bree Tanner. Warning: must have read SM's novella first! canon pairings, T for now but that may change
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 14,801 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 9/12/2010 - Published: 6/28/2010
The Coven by kimbocymru1 reviews
After meeting a stranger outside a club who sets her body on fire, Bella's life takes a drastic turn. Kidnapped parents, ransom notes and a bronzed haired God that seems to want to simultaneously save her and kill her.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 34,021 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 8/26/2010 - Published: 6/18/2010 - Bella, Edward
The Screamers by KiyaRaven reviews
Street kid. Rockstar. Worlds apart and yet so similar. Sometimes fate throws people together for a reason, and sometimes two people that rub each other the wrong way make the best sparks. All Human **WARNING: MOSTLY HUMOR BUT ALSO CONTAINS ANGST & DARK THEMES**
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 358,773 - Reviews: 12412 - Favs: 6,872 - Follows: 3,414 - Updated: 6/2/2010 - Published: 5/23/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
I'll Be Your Lover, Too by Mrs.Robward reviews
Removed for rewriting & completion, then will repost.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 28 - Reviews: 323 - Favs: 279 - Follows: 318 - Updated: 5/11/2010 - Published: 7/10/2009 - Edward, Bella
Ethan Church by dryler reviews
When Bella accepts an offer to write the biography of a severely reclusive author, the old, dying man she’s presented with and the young, too perfect man she meets while there convince her she’s missing some very important parts of the story. E/B, AU.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 37,805 - Reviews: 2743 - Favs: 3,356 - Follows: 1,757 - Updated: 5/7/2010 - Published: 5/26/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
I Hate Myself For Loving You by halojones reviews
Bella's ready to bust out of her shell in college with roomie Alice. She meets the dazzling but rakish Edward, but is warned of his less than angelic ways. Will B/A be just another notch in the belt for J/E, or will they teach the boys a lesson or two?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 60 - Words: 239,525 - Reviews: 10013 - Favs: 7,382 - Follows: 6,086 - Updated: 4/19/2010 - Published: 3/28/2008
The Red Line by WinndSinger reviews
Edward is an exotic male dancer. Bella is a college student studying psychology and needs a subject to do her thesis on. Bella pays Edward to belong to her for 2 weeks so she can study him. Things soon get very interesting between them.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 40 - Words: 351,671 - Reviews: 19326 - Favs: 11,938 - Follows: 5,467 - Updated: 5/1/2009 - Published: 1/26/2009 - Edward, Bella
A World Without Sound by The Romanticidal Edwardian reviews
AU, BxE. My name is Bella Swan; good at sign language and karate. My best friend is deaf, and you know what? It doesn't matter. Won twice at Twilight Awards, and has been nominated more. Please review!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 22 - Words: 105,849 - Reviews: 7609 - Favs: 8,675 - Follows: 2,446 - Updated: 9/27/2008 - Published: 6/1/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Until The Darkness Goes
Edward is a struggling rock star, hitting the shadier pavements of London to find a way to make it.For the next gig at Borderline, he promises his band mates that this will be the night. Bella was coming, the super talented and famous record producer.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,299 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/8/2012 - Bella, Edward