Tihs is weird, but intrseting! If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed erveylteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! Paste this to your profile if you can read this!

Fire and Ice

Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.

But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice.

Invictus, by William Ernest Henley

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

Like in Naruto fanfics

Naruto/Hinata (not the automatically fall in love ones; the slow buildup ones)

Naruto/Anko

Naruto/Kurenai (new favorite!)

Naruto/harem (no more than 4 cause then it gets confusing)

Naruto/Ayame

Naruto/Samui

Naruto/Shion (one of the few girls that actively chases Naruto romantically)

Naruto/Shizuka (one of the few girls that actively chases Naruto romantically)

Naruto/Temari

Maybe in Naruto fanfics

Naruto/Tenten (if the story is done right)

Naruto/Tsunade (mostly in lemon fics)

Naruto/Yugao (same as Tsunade)

Naruto/Shizune

Hate in Naruto fanfic

Naruto/yaoi (...need i explain y?)

Naruto/Sakura (ever heard of spousal abuse!?)

Naruto/Ino (imagine the children...tooo loud!!; exception made for lemon fics)

Like in Harry Potter fanfics

Harry/Crimson Foxes (Angelina, Alicia and Katie; separate or together is great)

Harry/Daphne (one of the only "neutral" slytherins i know)

Harry/Tracy (same as Daphne)

Harry/Fleur

Harry/Hermione (sometimes... depends on the story)

Harry/Tonks (she's fun and Harry needs more fun)

Harry/Narcissa (just to stick it to Malfoy)

Harry/Padma (she's smart, pretty and is basically a blank slate that any author can use)

Harry/Pansy (so many angles that u can use this)

Harry/Susan Bones

Hate in Harry Potter fanfics

Harry/yaoi (...need i explain?)

Harry/Ginny (Ok, here I'm gonna rant. who's idea is it to stick harry with his biggest fan-girl? I mean seriously! Just her first appearance in sorcerer's stone as disturbing; "Oh, mommy can I see him?" what is he? a zoo animal? not only that but J.K. Rowling adds her to Harry so suddenly it screams "Love potion!!!" Nobody suddenly realizes he's in love with someone. It just ain't happening. It happens slowly and one realizes there are feelings first.)

Sayings

Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work or prison. -Tim Allen

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time. -Robin Williams

"Ah, yes, divorce. From the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet." -Robin Williams

People say hate is a strong word, but so is love. And people throw it around like it's nothing. -Unknown

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away.

The believer is happy. The doubter is wise.

We all know God invented liquor to keep the Irish from ruling the world.

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'. -Chris Rock

Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell's afraid I'll take over.

Common sense is the most uncommon thing in the world.

Stress: A condition caused by repressing the body's desire to strangle the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it.

Life is a tragedy for those who feel and a comedy for those who think.

"You see, among all men-those who value beauty, money, success, prestige-those of us who value love are the most dangerous of all. More than any others, we will compromise morals, ethics, our lives, and the lives of those around us-all for the sake of love."

Millions long for immortality, but do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon. -Susan Ertz

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself. -Harvey Fierstein

Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably why so few engage in it. -Henry Ford

A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer. -Robert Frost

Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich. -Napoleon Bonaparte

In politics, stupidity is not a handicap. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Love is the self-delusion we manufacture to justify the trouble we take to have sex. -Daniel S. Greenberg

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

The road to hell is ordered by the righteous, planned by the well-meaning, and paved with their good intentions.

When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.

If you find yourself in a fair fight you didn't plan your mission properly.

A woman is like a teabag; you never know how strong she is until she's in hot water. -Eleanor Roosevelt

"Sex could kill you. Do you know what the human body goes through when you have sex? Pupils dilate, arteries constrict, core temperature rises, heart races, blood pressure skyrockets, respiration becomes rapid and shallow, the brain fires bursts of electrical impulses from nowhere to nowhere, secretions spit out of every gland and the muscles tense and spasm like you're lifting three times your body weight. It's violent, it's ugly and it's messy. And if God hadn't made it unbelievably fun, the human race would have died out eons ago. Men are lucky they can only have one orgasm. Do you know that women can have an hour long orgasm?" -Dr.Allison Cameron - House, M.D.

"Life with men is like a deck of cards... You need a Heart to love them, a Diamond to marry them, a Club to beat them, and a Spade to bury the bastards." -Unknown

I am prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. - Winston Churchill

He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you. -Friedrich Nietzsch

"One of the most obvious facts about grownups to a child is that they have forgotten what it is like to be a child." -Randall Jarrell

Butch: "You so need to lighten up about the potato-launcher incident.
Phury: "You broke my window."
Butch: "Of course we did. V and I were aiming for it."
Phury: "Twice."
Butch: "Thus proving that he and I are outstanding marksmen."
-Butch and Phury, Lover Unbound

"Me? I'm dishonest, and with a dishonest man, you can always trust him to be dishonest. Honestly, it's the honest ones you have to watch out for because you never know when he's going to turn around and do something incredibly stupid." -Jack Sparrow, PotC

"All I see in your sword is fear. If you dodge, you're afraid of being hit. If you're protecting someone, you're afraid they'll die. If you attack, you're afraid you'll cut them. There is no place for fear here. Do you see the resolve to cut you in my blade? If I dodge, I won't let you hit me. If I'm protecting someone, I won't let them die. If I'm attacking, I will cut you." -Urahara Kisuke, Bleach

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

Life is about trusting your feelings and taking chances, losing and finding happiness, appreciating the memories, learning from the past, and realizing people change.

That which doesn't kill you...will probably try again.

Good judgment comes from experience, experience comes from bad judgment.

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.

The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a crib-house whore. We don't just borrow words; on occasion English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary.

Don’t tell me the sky is the limit when there are Footprints on the moon…

It only takes 20 years for a liberal to become a conservative without changing a single idea.

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.

War doesn’t determine who’s right. War determines who’s left.

If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?

I once prayed to God for a bike, but quickly found out he didn't work that way…so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness.

The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.

Anyone who uses the phrase “easy as taking candy from a baby” has never tried taking candy from a baby.

Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over the strings are attached.

Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence. (A life sentence!)

Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results. -Narcotics Anonymous

When I say I love you, you say you don't deserve it. When I say I need you, you say I deserve someone better. When I say my life is better with you, you say I don't know any better. But when I kiss you, you say I love you. When I have to go, you say I need you. When I am with you, you know, that there is no better feeling then our love coming together and that is something we both deserve.

I'll always be beside you until the very end, wiping all your tears away, being your best friend. I'll smile when you smile and feel all the pain you do, and if you cry a single tear, I promise I'll cry too.

Some people believe that holding on and hanging in there are signs of strength. However, there are times in life in which it takes much more strength to just let go.

This life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come and go too. And baby, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up because if you give up, you'll never find your soulmate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about.”

-Marilyn Monroe

To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest citizens and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give of one’s self; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived—this is to have succeeded.

- Bessie Anderson Stanley

Deception may be found everywhere, and as ninjas we see it every day. However if one were to simply open their eyes and observe carefully, they would see that the roots of all deception lie at home. For it is where we are at the most ease that we feel the need to overlook the most important things no matter how small they seem. For these very things are the root of our problems, they slowly blinds us all to the bigger picture, the grand conception, and in doing so opens us to heartbreak and sorrow. I find it safe to say that deception would not exist in this world at all so long as we all just opened our eyes and stopped our everyday tasks to take a moment and think about what truly causes our pain. Is it the act of a breaking bond? The death of a friend? The destruction of a home? All are tragic, yet none compare to the pain that can be felt when one is betrayed, the pain of an iron wedge being driven through your heart, yet even this is dwarfed by the betrayal of family, for when that wedge starts burning it does not just separate the betrayer from the others. It will tear a family apart slowly as they grieve and fight, an act that is as cruel as can be. Yet none of this can compare to the sight of their faces as they are betrayed, nothing compares to the joy I feel now as I watch you stand there shocked. Yes, this is true satisfaction.

-Naruto Namikaze- Anbu Captain

People live their lives bound by what they accept as correct and true. That is how they define 'reality'. But what does it mean to be 'correct' or 'true'? Merely vague concepts... their 'reality' may all be a mirage. Can we consider them to simply be living in their own world, shaped by their beliefs? After all, reality and illusion are interchangeable. One's reality might be another's illusion. We all live inside our own fantasies.

- Itachi Uchiha (my fav anime character to date)

Every human being relies on and is bound by his knowledge and experiences in life. This is what we call “reality”. However, knowledge and experience are ambiguous, thus reality can become illusion. Is it not possible to think that, all human beings are living in their assumptions?

- Different variation of above quote by Itachi Uchiha

"People are people," Harry agreed. "Some are good, some are foolish, some are evil and some intolerant and yet most still act like sheep in the end. Rally to a person of will and follow without thought of why and justify their actions for a goal. The greater good, preserving society and any other number of causes can cause the descent to corruption. Tell me not the means to ones ends as they will speak of reason and necessity to overlook all acts of brutality and control merely tell me what the ends must justify. It is easier to sleep when one knows who one's friend and one's foe is."

-Harry Potter (Enter the Silver Flame)

Downward ever downward the path of decadent debauchery we go! Never more to restrain our exaltation with remorse shall we be! Oh fear us ye who hate we proud in our dreams that deviate from your docile dogma! For we shall live on embracing our lust of life!

-- Dora smashed out of her mind at her final parting with Andromeda Tonks.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people don't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

- Mariane Williamson

I would rather be ashes than dust. I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than be stifled by dry rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.

- A personal favorite by Jack London

How is it that one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

- Unknown

"Dating is like pulling off a successful heist. It's fun, it's thrilling, and you seem to have gained a lot from nothing. But marriage... (sigh) marriage is like getting arrested after that crime. You lose your rights, your liberty, and when the adrenaline finally wears off, you realize how dreary your life has become, doing mundane chores and eating the same three square meals every day. It's a stable but banal existence that will suck the life out of you."

-"La Tormenta" by Jiraiya's Dream

What about you, Jack? What's it going to be? Loyalty to your country, or loyalty to me? Your country, or your old mentor? The mission, or your beliefs? Your duty to your unit, or your personal feelings? You don't know the truth yet. But sooner or later you'll have to choose.

-- The Boss

"Is there such a thing as an absolute, timeless enemy? There is no such thing, and never has been. And the reason is that our enemies are human beings like us. They can only be our enemies in relative terms. The world must be made whole again."

— The Boss

"One must die and one must live. No victory, no defeat. The survivor will carry on the fight. It is our destiny... The one who survives will inherit the title of Boss. And the one who inherits the title of Boss will face an existence of endless battle."

— The Boss to Naked Snake (a.k.a. Big Boss)

"We have forsaken our countries, we have left our motherlands behind us, and we have become one with the earth. We have no nation, no philosophy, no ideology. We go where we are needed, not for country, not for government… but for ourselves. We need no reason to fight, we fight because we are needed. We are the deterrent for those with no recourse. We are Soldiers Without Borders, our purpose is defined by the era that we live in. We may sometimes have to sell our services and ourselves. When the times demand it, we will be revolutionaries, criminals, terrorists. And yes… we may all be heading straight to hell. But then there is no better place for us. This is our only home. Our heaven and our hell. This is… Outer-Heaven…"

-- Big-Boss, 1974

The nightmares? They never go away, Snake. Once you've been on the battlefield, tasted the exhilaration, the tension... it all becomes part of you. Once you've awakened the warrior within... it never sleeps again. You crave ever bigger tensions, ever bigger thrills. As a mercenary, I'd think you would have realized that by now. You care nothing for power, or money, or even sex. The only thing that satisfies your cravings is war! All I've done is give you a place for it. I've given you a reason to live.

-- Big Boss

"Relax son, enjoy every moment! You fight, then eat good food. You fight, then drink fine wine. You fight, then sleep with beautiful women. Hell, fight with beautiful women! That is what it means to live."

-- Augus to Asura

"Something to protect? Nonsense! The only reason we fight is the fight itself!"

-- Augus to Yasha

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I go out with you", and take into account the fact that I went out with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct . . . leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A."

My problem with Dxd as of 12/28/16

As I sat down to write my latest chapter of Kage no Kitsune, I thought about everything revealed and written about the Dxd universe and came to a startling conclusion.

I was starting to really hate Dxd.

Now, the reason I hate it isn't because of Issei (though that's admittedly part of it). It's more that it gives the feeling of a great chance wasted. The author created this incredibly comprehensive world which the main character entered. It involved every single mythological faction and religion, heroes, devils and angels all surrounded by the underlying theme of this world that was first uttered by Nietzche: God is dead.

This underlying theme and the factors involved in it could have created an incredible world on par with J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter universe. Heck, the latter has admittedly quite a few plot holes or things unanswered. Despite that, I feel more of sense of completeness with that universe while still leaving room for fanfiction writers like us to use.

Dxd does not have that.

Much like the HP universe, there are many plot holes. However, the differences between the two is that the plot holes are not only extremely glaring and completely destroys the overall plot of Dxd but extremely easy to cover if the author only tried. I mean, everything in the story seems to aggrandize Sacred Gear users and make everyone else seem like weaklings. Magicians? Shown in one volume only as villains and even then a weak, not having mastered Balance Breaker Issei could beat them. Heroes? Have the most idiotic goal in the world when they could have given so much more depth and then beaten without given them so much as a backstory. OLD SATAN FACTION?! Killed off as the first enemies of all by a bunch of weak TEENAGERS!!! I mean REALLY?!

This just highlights the problem I have with the Dxd universe. Everything seems geared to give Issei enemies to beat with no work given into giving those enemies a good backstory and reason behind their actions. Heck, I felt more empathy for Voldemort, a out and out psycho who wants to kill or enslave everyone, than for Masaomi Yaegaki, the exorcist lover of devil Cleria Belial who both were killed for simply falling in love! I mean, really?! He could have done so much with that from the freaking beginning! Heck, using that as a sort of compare and contrast with Issei's relationship with Rias yet nothing!!! Ugh!!

I'm writing this because every time I sit down to try and write, continue or even rewrite one of my Dxd stories, I come to this same problem! In order to write a serious fic regarding Dxd I have to basically change everything about it as well as add things from other anime. For example, I imagine the Extra Devils (who are completely ignored for some reason in Dxd) to be similar to the demons of shinmai maou no testament. They have their own government separate from the Pillars and their own "Maou". I also took the idea of a Hero Faction from shinmai maou no testament to beef up humanity. Holy/Demon swords? Completely done away with and replaced with being similar to Noble Phantasms from Type Moon that still retain the essence of their heroic wielders. Instead exorcists can channel holy powers through their weapons to turn them into temporary "holy" swords. More in-depth about the other mythological factions as well as making the Khaos Brigade actually dangerous! I mean, really?! If a bunch of teenagers can beat them then why doesn't the great Super Devils Sirzechs and Ajuka not just come in and wipe them out?!

Which brings me to the final problem: power levels.

... is the author retarded or does he really not think things through before writing?! I mean, it was fine in the beginning but it got ridiculous the moment he said Sirzechs's power was 10 times greater than the original Lucifer's. I mean, how does that even work?! Does that mean Sirzechs is stronger than God of the Bible or was Lucifer really that weak!? I mean, what idiot says stuff like that and expects us to not get completely lost?! I mean, Sirzechs isn't even on the Top 10 strongest as established by the author so how strong are those in the Top Ten and why don't they ever show up?! Heck, even the strength between those Top Ten is debatable and I actually had an argument with a friend over whether Shiva was stronger than Ophis or not. Since the author is an idiot and put that Shiva could supposedly beat TriHexa yet TriHexa is supposed to be on par with Great Red, doesn't that mean Shiva is stronger than Ophis?! Yet he stated that Ophis was the strongest below Great Red so how is that possible!? It's stuff like this that give me headaches and has led me to my decision.

I'm going to take a break from Dxd related stories while I think up a way to cover all these plot holes. Basically, I'm going to create my own universe using Dxd as a base and change things to cover plot holes and make an actually good story. Because every time I try to ignore them and write a story, I'm forced to abandon it due to these plot holes and problems. So until I cover them, my new year's resolution is to not write a Dxd story until I cover those plot holes! Sorry for those annoyed by this but I won't be able to write a good story with Dxd as is. Though I promise once those plot holes are covered, I'm going to give you a story worth the wait.