SherlockedinStohess
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Poll: Should I do the Kili/OC story? I plan on doing this before the Thilbo one, which I will do, but after this one is done. Vote Now!
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Joined 05-14-10, id: 2364250, Profile Updated: 01-21-13
Author has written 15 stories for Underworld, D.Gray-Man, Twilight, Hobbit, and Star Trek: 2009.

HELLOOOOOOO PROFILE WANDERER! I have lots of crap written on here in random order so beware :D If you have any questions about my stories and can't find it here, feel free to ask me or ask in a review.

But before I say anything else...GO WATCH THE HOBBIT RIGHT NOW! I saw it eleven times, ELEVEN TIMES, in theaters and I'm still not sick of it! It's f*ing amazing! I'll be letting out a stream of Hobbit fics to go with my DGM ones, so watch out! >:D Here comes the flood! (And OMFG Thilbo Bagginshield is the best pairing ever!)

1/14/13: I've decided to take down my story Spiral Into Erebor, simply because I don't have time for it, because my main focus is The Art of War and Words. I don't want to leave you guys hanging, so I took it down, since I wouldn't be updating it very much. Sorry to all who liked and reviewed it. I might post it again after I'm done with The Art of War and Words and when school calms down.


I have 13 stories in 4 different fandoms:

The Hobbit: Never Been So Wrong (Thilbo Bagginshield, T), The Art of War and Words (Thilbo, T), Sleep (Thilbo again, K), Wounds Solve Everything (Thilbo, T) and In the Water (Fili/Kili/Bilbo, M)

D.Gray-Man: Confessions (Tyki/Allen, M), Dream Cum True (Yuvi, M), and the rest are Yullen stories: Overheard (M), Simply Yullen (M), Give It A Shot (M), and Unsanitary (M).

Twilight: A Change of Heart (Edward/OC, T)

Underworld: New Life (OC/OC, T)


So...erm...I'm not really sure what to say on a profile page. I'm a girl in highschool, so you can expect some drama in my stories. My b-day is Feb. 26th and I like animals so if people die in my stories instead of animals, that's why. I like anime and video games, which is where most of the fics I write and read come from. Final Fantasy 7, Kuroshitsuji and D. Gray Man are my favorites. I'm Finnish (and damn proud of it) and have seen that there are some people from Finland who seem to be coming back to read, so hello to my fellow Suomen kansa! I like to use foreign stuff in my stories, like a character or words or something (like in New Life, both of the main characters are foreign...kinda) so if you know what I'm talking about in them, comment. And if I'm doing anything related to that stuff wrong, please tell me, i don't like looking like an idiot! I'm also a grammar Nazi!

Anywho, all of my stories that I have on here have taken a very long time to write, revise and edit by myself because I don't have any help. I'm in high school and I love writing, so if you anything to say THEN PLEASE REVIEW! REVIEWS are what keeps a story/author going and if you LIKE a story then you want it to continue right? So then you REVIEW for it! SO IF YOU LIKE ME STORY THEN REVIEW IT BECAUSE I WILL STOP WRITING IF I DON'T GET ANY!!!!!! I'm serious people, even though I have a lot of stories and I know peeps come back, it really deflates my confidence to see that people still read it but don't feel like they should comment.

Just a little something about me, if you're so inclined to read it.

-Spell your name without vowels: Mk
-Are you single?:
Yes, I’ve only ever had two boyfriends
-What’s your favorite number?:
7. I put it in everything…
-What color do you wear most?:
Black or blue, ‘cuz I have nothing else to wear but sweatshirts
-Least favorite color?:
Yellow and green. Idk why, but they bug me…
-Favorite candy?:
Twizzlers…none of that generic crap either, it’s Twizzlers or nothin’!
-What do you smoke?:
Nothing and it will stay that way, my grandpa died from COPD
-Are you happy with your life right now?:
Not especially
-Anyone ever said you resemble a celebrity?:
Apparently I look like a female version of Kurt from Glee and the little girl in Hocus Pocus
-What is your favorite class in school?: …Hmmm…Ceramics or math, I’m good with numbers
-Do you shop at hollister/DC/Bluenotes?:
Oh gods no, no way in hell I’d go there…
-How do you make money?:
My grandma sends me monthly allowance and sometimes allowance from my Mom
-Who is your best friend?: A hermit-artist named Jordan, which is sad, ‘cause the two I used to consider as bff’s are stuck up bitches now
-Where do you go to school?: Like I’d tell you!
-Are you outgoing?:
When it comes to roller coasters yes; people…WAY different story
-One word to describe you?:
A nerd/geek, and not the slutty-not-nerdy/geeky-in-any-way type
-Favorite pair of shoes?:
I LOVE my new wedge heels, but let’s get real, I wear my tennis shoes everyday
-Do you own big sunglasses?: That depends, they went through the wash and I haven’t bothered to fix them…
-Where do you wish you were right now?: Finland speaking Suomi
-What should you be doing right now?:
Studying for a chem test I will fail tomorrow
-Do you have a crush on anyone right now?:
Yes, my old best friend, but she recently got married at 17 so that’s out…

HONEST SECTION:
-Honestly, what color is your underwear?:
Various colors with flowers
-Honestly, what's on your mind right now?:
Yaoi
-Honestly, what are you doing right now?:
Typing and listening to Stronger by Kelly Clarkson
-Honestly, have you done something bad today?:
Yes…I stole and ate some plain frosting we are saving…
-Honestly, do you watch disney channel?: Used to, when it was actually good
-Honestly, who is the last person you talked to on the phone?:
My Mom
-Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now?:
Yes, my best friends asshole husband (remember that crush I told you about?)
-Honestly, what makes you mad most of the time?: Small children, my sisters and all the dumbasses at my school who think they are smart but are really annoying
-Honestly, do you bite your nails?:
Thankfully no, I never have
-Honestly, do you want to see someone this very moment?:
Yes
-Honestly, are you keeping a big secret right now?:
Yes, I’ve yet to ‘come out of the closet’

THE CANS
-Can you blow a bubble?:
Yeah
-Can you dance?:
No, unless I want to look like a chicken running around with its head cut off
-Can you do a cart wheel?:
Yep, I used to be in gymnastics
-Can you tie a cherry stem with your mouth?:
I dunno, I think so
-Can you whistle?: Sort of
-Can you wiggle your ears?:
No, yet I still try…
-Can you wiggle your nose?:
Not without scrunching up my face
-Can you roll your tongue?: Yeah
-Can you make a clover with your tongue?:
Yes

ANGER SECTION:
-What do you do when you’re mad?:
Yell, cry or whisper what I wished I could have said in the conversation
-What’s the worst thing you’ve done when you were mad?: Nearly broke my mom’s laptop by hitting it
-Ever made anyone cry when you were mad?:
I don’t think so, but I’ve made myself cry
-Do you swear when you’re mad?:
To myself, never in front of other people, unless it’s my sister

CRYING SECTION:
-Ever really cried your heart out?:
Yes, quite a few times
-Ever cried yourself to sleep?:
Yes, when I came back from my crush’s wedding
-Ever cried on your friend’s shoulder?:
Yes, when I admitted to a friend about my crush
-Ever cried over the opposite sex?:
If crying over my favorite characters when they die, then yes.
-Ever cried over the same sex?:
Yes, my crush
-Do you cry when you get an injury?:
Hell yes, I’m a wuss
-Do certain songs make you cry?:
When I’m sad and feel like crying, sometimes
-Do certain movies make you cry?:
Yes, but only sometimes. Usually I try to hide it if I’m around other people

HAPPY SECTION:
-Are you usually a happy person?
Psh, no, I’m quiet so you usually can’t tell
-What makes you the happiest?:
Imagining beating the crap out of people I don’t like, soda, anime, music, certain tv shows/movies, reading yaoi/manga
-Does being with your friends make you happy?: Most of the time
-Do you believe in yourself?: Not really
-Do you wish you were happier?:
Hell yes. I wish things were easier too, but who doesn’t?
-Is being happy overrated?:
When someone is too happy, annoyingly so, then yes
-Can music make you happy?:
Most of the time, unless I want to cry ‘cause I’m sad

LOVE SECTION:
-How many times have you had your heart broken?:
Once
-Have you ever loved someone so much that you’d die for them?:
Yes
-Has anyone besides your friends and family ever said ‘I love you’?:
Yes

HATE SECTION:
-Do you actually hate anyone?:
Yes
-Ever made a hit list?:
In my mind
-Have you ever been on a hit list?:
Uh…maybe in the heat of an argument, but I’m generally not that confrontational…
-Are you a mean bully?: No
-Do you hate George Bush?:
Most of the things he’s done, yes

SELF ESTEEM SECTION:
-Is your self-esteem extremely low?:
Yes
-Are you good looking?:
If I try and my hair is cooperating, partially.
-Do you wish you could be someone else?:
Yes, I wish I could be a vampire from Vampire Diaries or an Exorcist from D. Gray-Man, if I knew how to handle all the crap that goes along with it of course. Either that stuff or super smart like one of my friends, who is the first in our class of 800 juniors
-What is your current hair color?:
Darkish blonde, it was a strawberry blonde but that went away
-Current piercings?:
No, I’m too much of a weanie to try
-Have any tattoos?:
No, but at certain times I’ve wanted one
-Straight hair or curly?:
Wavy-ish

CURRENTLY WEARING:
-What shirt are you wearing?:
Assassin's Creed III: Revelations t-shirt
-Shoes?: No shoes right now, just penguin socks
-Necklace(s)?:
A little silver heart

HAVE YOU EVER:
-Hugged someone?:
That’s a stupid question, who hasn’t?
-Been on the phone until the sun came up?:
No, but I’ve been in an online chat that long XD
-Laughed so hard you peed in your pants?:
Perhaps when I was very little but not that I can recount
-Laughed so hard you cried?:
Yes, it’s so fun!
-Got in a fight with someone?:
Hell yes, everyday

THE LAST:
-Person you talked to in person?:
My sister who’s upstairs
-Person you talked to online?:
A reviewer for a story of mine on here
-Person you hugged?:
My friend Jordan, as mentioned above.

RANDOM:
-Do you like surveys?:
Sometimes, if they aren’t annoying and judgmental
-Do you get along with your parents?:
My Mom, most of the time, my Dad, I hate him
-Do you have mental breakdowns?:
When I’m alone and there’s no chance of anybody hearing/seeing

CURRENT:
-Current mood:
Bored/Sad/Nervous
-Current music:
In My World from Ao No Exorcist
-Current hair style:
Ponytail
-Current crush:
My friend Katya
-Current thing I ought to be doing:
Pretty sure I’ve already answered that question…
-Current windows open:
Email, FanFiction.net and 4shared
-Did you ever get into a fist fight in school?:
No, but I’ve thought about decking some people
-Did you ever run away from home?:
Yeah, but I didn’t get far and came back
-Did you ever want to be a doctor?: no
-Did you ever want to be a fire fighter?:
nope

THE DOS:
-Do you know how to swim?:
Yeah, I could be a lifeguard, I applied for the job
-Do you like roller coasters?: OMG I love them
-Do you own a bike?: Yeah, but I never really use it and it currently has flat tires
-Do you think you could handle the stuff they eat on those reality shows?:
Idk, I don’t watch reality shows

THE DOES:
-Does hair loss run in your family at all?:
Not as far as I know, but my 30 year old cousin is bald and nobody knows why…he didn’t shave his head either
-Does your car get good gas mileage?:
Not good mileage, but not bad.
-Does your family have family picnics?:
Psh, like my family gives a crap about that stuff

THE HAVES:
-Have you ever been on a plane?:
A few times
-Have you ever been to the ocean?:
I’ve flown over it, does that count?
-Have you ever painted your nails?:
Of course I have, but I always ending up wishing I hadn’t ‘cause it’s a pain to get off

THE HOWS:
-How tall are you?:
5'1” or 5’2”
-How much money do you have on you right now?:
None, I’m in my pajamas

THE LASTS:
-Last person you hung out with?:
Friend wise, I can’t even remember it’s been so long, I don’t have many friends
-Last thing someone said to you: My mom told me to tell my sister she would be home late

THE WHATS:
-What are you listening to?:
He Lives In You from Lion King
-What is the weather outside?: Sunny but cold
-What radio station do you listen to?:
94.5 if I listen at all
-What was the last restaurant you ate at?
OLIVE GARDEN BITCHES!
-What was the last thing you had to drink?: Mtn Dew, I’m drinking it now
-What was the last movie you watched?:
The Hobbit, which if you haven't seen, you haven't lived. I'm obsessed with it; seen it seven times so far!


Now, I know people have lots of these on their profiles or they don't have any at all, but I was looking at someone's profile and these things just touched my heart, the first making me cry so hard. So please read them and pass them on.

This is a story about a little girl that was abused. If you care at all, copy and paste this into your profile:

My name is Sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all
I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long
When I awake
I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home.
When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall.
I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry
.He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate.
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy,
Murdered me.

Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!


The white man said, "Coloured people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me coloured?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
(Post this on your profile if you hate racism.)


On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late! You lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save more time? Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children. (Hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation)

On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (But no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. (Somebody got paid big bucks to write this one)

On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. (Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief!)

On a can of cashews: Warning: May contain cashews. (Really? I never would have guessed!)

Copy & Paste this to your profile if you think those are all extremely stupid labels.


1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting likeyour father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY. " There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16 My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me. "

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you".

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD THE ONES YOU ARE!)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA.
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil (So I’ve been told)
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUN HAT sun hat when I go outside so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.

I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST play the bagpipes and eat hoggis.

I'm a LONER so I MUST hate everyone.

I'm Finnish so i MUST forget about everything I do

I'm Finnish so i MUST be a hoarder

I listen to music in different languages so I MUST be a know-it-all freak


Stupid things! In bold are things I've done!

1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails (it was actually in a chair, but close enough)
3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head
7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself (hey, if they see you, that just means they are looking back ;) )
8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand
9. Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. Tried to pull open a door that said push
11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion
12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
13. Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs
14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave
15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair
16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble
17. Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it
18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard
19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name
20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot
21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on
22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle.
23. Have run into a closed door
24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else
25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it
26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer
28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan
29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock
31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside
33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot
36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on
37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard
39. Walked into a pole
40. Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident
41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house
42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on
43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it
45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do.
46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it (i was supposed to grab my ginger ale but got my uncles beer. worst. mix up. evar!).
47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. Have poked yourself in the eye
49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on (it was a shirt, but close enough)
50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair
51. Have done enough stupid things to make a test
52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil
53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it
54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was.
55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were
56. Looked into an overhead light purposefully while it was on
57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day.
58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it
60. Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny or a movie
61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it
63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person
65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side
66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions
67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it
69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out-
70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face
72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. Ran into a door jam
74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. Have purposely licked playground sand
77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band
78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't
79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people
80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out
81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
83. Sat and wondered why men’s dress shirts have a loop on the back.
84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about
85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair
86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone (who hasn't? ;D)
87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird
88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people
89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria
90. Sucked on a cup and got a hickey from it.
91. As you were writing, you moved your head back and forth with your pen/pencil
92. Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them
93. Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper
94. Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours
95. Started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story
96. When you saw a ‘beware of dog’ sign, you told the owners to beware of the dogs not realizing they owned the dogs
97. You have spelled your own name wrong before
98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling.
99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class.
100. Have popped a balloon in your mouth.

Wow, 76/100. I'm an 'average' idiot! :D


Lol, I just took the seme uke test and apparently I am a: Clueless Uke! Most compatible with: Opportunist Seme, Romantic Seme
Least compatible with: Sadistic Seme, Don't Fuck With Me Seme If you want to take this test its at www(dot)semeuke(dot)com/quiz(dot)php :D good luck!

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Unexpected Road to Recovery by Green String reviews
Daisy, a depressed, abused teen finally ends it all. Waking up in the Shire she thinks she has arrived in her afterlife, only to be swept up in a quest to a mountain. And whilst trying to figure out why she was sent there, she learns what it is like to be loved for the first time in her life.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 29 - Words: 75,899 - Reviews: 456 - Favs: 306 - Follows: 433 - Updated: 4/14 - Published: 12/28/2012 - Bilbo B., Thorin
Dreams: to Stay by His Side by stickdonkey reviews
What would have happened if Bilbo had made different choices at crucial moments during the quest to reclaim Lonely Mountain from Smaug? A companion piece to Memories: Beautiful and Painful Things. Mix of Movieverse and Bookverse with no major spoilers since we are going AU with this. Thilbo/Bagginshield.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 38 - Words: 129,145 - Reviews: 332 - Favs: 325 - Follows: 426 - Updated: 4/2 - Published: 12/31/2012 - [Thorin, Bilbo B.]
When the Past Encroaches on the Present by stickdonkey reviews
As Bilbo's 111th birthday draws near, he longs for the love he lost sixty years ago and is surprised when a knock at the door turns out to be someone entirely unexpected. Will Thorin's unexpected return rekindle old flames that never truly went out or will it open old wounds that have never truly closed? AU R&R written by request of animefanreader402
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 37 - Words: 129,197 - Reviews: 430 - Favs: 248 - Follows: 342 - Updated: 3/31 - Published: 1/7/2013 - [Thorin, Bilbo B.]
Last Homely Hole by ClassicalTorture reviews
Thorin wakes up in an unfamiliar room, feverish and in the care of a curious and quite gorgeous being. Last thing he remembers is tumbling down the hill in Hobbiton. Bilbo just wants to know who exactly did he have to lug to his house through the rain. Lots of new fanart to see in my profile for this! Also on AO3 /works/634116/chapters/1147495
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 35,785 - Reviews: 869 - Favs: 1,026 - Follows: 1,193 - Updated: 2/23 - Published: 12/26/2012 - Thorin, Bilbo B.
Blogging by Forever the Uke reviews
What's a Geek like Allen meant to do when he finds out that his idol could be in his class? With some stalking, verbal diarrhoea and heartfelt chats with his cat, Allen might just realise that, maybe, his idol isn't really that far out of reach.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 41,778 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 155 - Updated: 2/8 - Published: 1/27/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
Thorin Oakenshield's Majestic Diary by Fruitsie reviews
Thorin Oakenshield, King Under the Mountain and Totally Majestic Badass of Middle Earth, does not have a raging hard-on for Bilbo Baggins. No, seriously. Just read his diary.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 32,494 - Reviews: 408 - Favs: 513 - Follows: 590 - Updated: 1/23 - Published: 1/25/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B.
Elliot Jaeger by Yumiii reviews
Sequel to 39 weeks and 2 days. Fourteen-month-old Elliot isn't known for getting himself into trouble. But when an inevitable disaster strikes, it's up to Eren and Levi to go against all odds to save their son. (Warnings inside)
Shingeki no Kyojin/進撃の巨人 - Rated: M - English - Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 11,241 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 131 - Updated: 1/9 - Published: 9/10/2013 - Eren Y., Levi
Covert Kisses by Ai Enmaxjigoku shoujo reviews
Armin Arlert is an elite member of a group of undercover agents known as the "Scouting Legion". He's done a million missions already but gets the shock of his life when he finds himself pretending to be a girl at a private college. As if that isn't bad enough, an unknowing student named Jean keeps hitting on him. Jean/Armin with hints of Levi/Eren and implied Ymir/Christa. COMPLETE
Shingeki no Kyojin/進撃の巨人 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 36,804 - Reviews: 134 - Favs: 196 - Follows: 256 - Updated: 12/27/2013 - Published: 7/2/2013 - Armin A., Jean K. - Complete
A Simple Request by Azshalade reviews
After the trial, Eren is left to his thoughts. That is, until, Corporal Levi comes to him with a most unusual "request". Later things take a turn for the bizarre when an intricate plot to sabotage the Scouting Legion is unveiled. Eren struggles with his feelings, Levi tries to bury his.
Shingeki no Kyojin/進撃の巨人 - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 93,528 - Reviews: 251 - Favs: 415 - Follows: 636 - Updated: 12/23/2013 - Published: 7/16/2013 - Eren Y., Levi
Final Fantasy Seven: Texts From Last Night MORE by Soyna reviews
MORE - Inspired drabbles based on humorous texts messages from the TFLN. Strange and quirky little stories that will include all eventually. Latest: Cloud and Zack should know better than to take things off Rufus' desk.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 30 - Words: 18,701 - Reviews: 144 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 11/22/2013 - Published: 12/1/2010
Recovery, Redemption and Romance by luvsbitca reviews
When Thorin is injured in the Battle of the Five Armies, Bilbo surprises everyone with his healing abilities. Then as Erebor starts to rebuild he continues to surprise people with his knowledge and skills. On top of everything else that is occuring there is a dwarf king and a hobbit are be trying to court one another without the other knowing. Direct Spoilers for the end of book.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 38 - Words: 113,054 - Reviews: 864 - Favs: 823 - Follows: 961 - Updated: 11/19/2013 - Published: 1/3/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin
Page Turner by karry4harry reviews
A stranger, a blank book and Audrey has found herself in the world of Twilight with a new past. Will Audrey's presence change the story? As days end, pages are written and Audrey discovers that her days within Forks and with Edward are numbered.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 175,009 - Reviews: 1096 - Favs: 500 - Follows: 526 - Updated: 11/6/2013 - Published: 2/12/2010 - Edward
Unexpected, Unwelcome, and Absolutely Perfect by That'sMzPeachesTYVM reviews
The pack is going to watch the Cullens practice for the impending battle. Most have never met the family. An imprint is made, changing the direction of Bella's life. Free will does not always mean that there is a choice. Rated M 4 Language & Lemons NOT A SLASH... Leah/Edward, Bella/Jacob
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 40 - Words: 115,776 - Reviews: 493 - Favs: 168 - Follows: 212 - Updated: 11/5/2013 - Published: 11/7/2011 - Leah, Bella
Tales of a Disgruntled Hobbit by Karategal reviews
Companion piece of "An Unexpected Addition". As Consort Under the Mountain, Bilbo quickly realizes that there's a lot more to dwarves than meets the eye. Short drabbles that focus on the lives of the Company after the Battle of the Five Armies and before the War of the Ring. Expect quite a lot of little Frodo, hurt/comfort moments, and Erebor's favorite royals.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 26 - Words: 49,725 - Reviews: 508 - Favs: 354 - Follows: 291 - Updated: 10/11/2013 - Published: 3/3/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
What Peace Brings by E-Loveless reviews
Following the Battle of the Five Armies, Thorin's belief in Bilbo's betrayal has lessened, but not enough to take back his banishment. Bilbo and Gandalf travel to Rivendell, where Lord Elrond insists that they remain, due to Bilbo's pregnancy. When an dwarven envoy is sent to express gratitude to the elves, parts of the old company come as well. Bilbo has a choice to make. MPREG
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 55,636 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 514 - Follows: 399 - Updated: 9/10/2013 - Published: 3/1/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Shower Talk by CanaanAlphardForever reviews
[3] Ymir, Krista, and a shower. Need I say more? Oneshot, with a more serious ending. YmirxKrista. AU. [Warning: slight abuse/violence]
Shingeki no Kyojin/進撃の巨人 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,228 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 151 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 8/15/2013 - Published: 8/1/2013 - [Krista L., Ymir] - Complete
Attack on Cravat by FluerDeLeis reviews
When Reader is dared to steal corporal Rivialle's Cravat in the dead of night, how will she manage to pull the feat off? Especially after she gets caught by Rivaille himself and forced to do his chores for a week? Reader x Rivaille
Shingeki no Kyojin/進撃の巨人 - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 34 - Reviews: 444 - Favs: 242 - Follows: 235 - Updated: 8/12/2013 - Published: 7/16/2013 - Auruo B. - Complete
Past and Present Entwined by stickdonkey reviews
Mature outtakes and extra scenes from my story When the Past Encroaches on the Preset so that it can remain rated T rather than bumped up to an M for a few little scenes. This can most likely be read without having read the other though without the other it turns into a smutty collection of one-shots. Thilbo/Bagginshield AU
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 18,906 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 7/28/2013 - Published: 2/25/2013 - [Thorin, Bilbo B.]
Of Hobbits and Majesty by bzp reviews
Thorin had his throne, his nephews, his honour, and wealth beyond belief. Yet, there Thorin sat, his mouth a thin line, his cold glare steady and unwavering, on the day he should be celebrating his victories. What no one knew, however, was that one year ago that day, Bilbo Baggins, a simple hobbit from the Shire, left Erebor with Thorin's heart.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 19 - Words: 21,304 - Reviews: 166 - Favs: 224 - Follows: 292 - Updated: 7/26/2013 - Published: 2/20/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin
A Very Respectable Hobbit by TheThirdStar reviews
Bilbo Baggins is going on an adventure and along the way he might just learn that being respectable isn't all it's cracked up to be. A look into how Bilbo got to know and befriend the dwarves and maybe, just maybe, come to care for one in particular. Slow burn Bagginshield, rating may change.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 261,573 - Reviews: 465 - Favs: 633 - Follows: 509 - Updated: 7/17/2013 - Published: 1/2/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
For Better or For Worse by The Emcee reviews
A long time ago, a hobbit, a Baggins of Bag End, saved a dwarf prince, one of the line of Durin, and died in the process. As a result, the dwarf prince made a vow to the dying Baggins that one day one of his line would take a Baggins as a consort to repay the hobbit for his sacrifice. Years passed and Gandalf the Grey pays Bilbo Baggins a visit that will change his life...
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 33 - Words: 79,283 - Reviews: 603 - Favs: 708 - Follows: 709 - Updated: 7/10/2013 - Published: 1/16/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Damn Bella by ZooperDooper reviews
Ways to annoy the Cullen family, By Bella Swan.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,498 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 7/8/2013 - Published: 5/15/2011 - Bella
Instinct by Mewpet2 reviews
Having recently been embarrassed and dumped by her boyfriend, Bella finds herself stranded miles away from home. When the weather turns bad, she seeks shelter in a nearby 'abandoned' shack. Bella/Jasper. OOC. Vamp/Human.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 28,815 - Reviews: 438 - Favs: 379 - Follows: 530 - Updated: 6/15/2013 - Published: 4/6/2012 - Bella, Jasper
39 weeks and 2 days by Yumiii reviews
What 39 weeks and 2 days brought into Eren and Rivaille's lives. Eren/Levi. Warning: yaoi, mpreg, lengthy one-shot. (Sequel: Elliot Jaeger)
Shingeki no Kyojin/進撃の巨人 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,749 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 339 - Follows: 65 - Published: 5/28/2013 - Eren Y., Levi - Complete
A Light in Dark Places by shinigami714 reviews
Flowers bloomed beneath his very feet, and the sun shone upon his head like a halo. As long as Bilbo Baggins walked the lands they would surely be blessed with life for eternity. An AU inspired and based on the myth of Demeter and Persephone. Prompted by Numia22. Thilbo!
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,400 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 17 - Published: 4/14/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
Ain't Nobody Who Can Sing Like Me by rollwithbutter reviews
Kili's not all that much to look at, by dwarf standards. The tale of how he discovers his passion for music and of his very first 'conquest' (wink, wink). Plenty of humorous brotherly affection, mischief, & an adorably infatuated Kili.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 28,745 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 4/10/2013 - Published: 1/18/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
A Completely Unnecessary Situation Caused By a Pruidish Hobbit by stickdonkey reviews
Privacy was easy to find in Lake Town. Now Thorin finds himself beyond frustrated when Bilbo refuses his advance due to a lack of it. Despite Thorin's attempts to find locations that are suitable for the purpose, Bilbo continues to reject them. This leads to Thorin making a very foolish decision to request a room for the night from Smaug . . . who agrees? Crackfic (well-written?)
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,921 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 4/4/2013 - Published: 3/29/2013 - [Thorin, Bilbo B.] Smaug - Complete
The Messenger by shinigami714 reviews
Sometimes a little push is all it takes to show us how strong our bonds truly are. A prompt fill for CatWesker, Fili/Kili Fluff, Smut, and a touch of Angst.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,696 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 10 - Published: 3/27/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Just Beyond the Reach by Aate reviews
Thorin wishes to protect Bilbo, but Bilbo can take care of himself just fine, thank you very much. Bilbo/Thorin slash, AU in which none of our lovely dwarves die during the whole Smaug ordeal. The fic is currently being betad by wonderful NoteMyGrin. (Original fic title "Hiding, Hiding Under Your Nose")
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 50,827 - Reviews: 728 - Favs: 674 - Follows: 679 - Updated: 3/26/2013 - Published: 12/26/2012 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Chance Encounters by DistantVampire reviews
Raven befriends the new goth in Dullsville. But what happens when an old enemy and her new friend meet? I suck at writing a summary... OC, abandoned buildings and such. AlexanderXRaven, JaggerXOC
Vampire Kisses - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 15,179 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 3/18/2013 - Published: 2/25/2012 - Jagger M.
In the Darkness a Torch We Hold by shinigami714 reviews
"Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable." – Bruce Lee, Fili/Kili, Angst, UST, Fluff, Smut, Incest.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 19,885 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 16 - Published: 3/17/2013 - Fili, Kili, Thorin, Dis - Complete
An Unexpected Addition by Karategal reviews
All of the dwarves survive the Battle of the Five Armies, but Bilbo must return to the Shire to sort out his old life and make way for a new one in Erebor. Over one year later, Bilbo comes back to the Lonely Mountain with a recently orphaned Frodo. King Thorin isn't quite sure what to make of this new, tiny addition to his Company. Slow build, Company and character focused.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 32 - Words: 94,444 - Reviews: 1967 - Favs: 1,754 - Follows: 1,303 - Updated: 3/11/2013 - Published: 12/20/2012 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Bone White and Brittle by littleblackdog reviews
AU, canon divergence. One fated night, Bilbo Baggins finds a pitiful little creature huddled in his garden, bleeding and broken. Adopted!Bolg, Father!Bilbo, families of choice. Contains child abuse/abandonment, violence, family, fluff, friendship, and angst. Includes some slow-burn Thorin/Bilbo romance.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 17,020 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 188 - Follows: 226 - Updated: 3/9/2013 - Published: 3/3/2013 - Bilbo B., Bolg
The Line of Durin by odmonkey reviews
Tales from the early lives of the last links in Durin's line - and their long-suffering uncle. Baby!Fili & Baby!Kili & Grumpy!Thorin. Good clean dwarf family fun - I don't own anything herein.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 23,185 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 151 - Follows: 189 - Updated: 3/8/2013 - Published: 1/5/2013 - Fili, Kili
Embrace and Defeat by shinigami714 reviews
Kili is a sickly child, and only Fili can keep his illness at bay. Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Romance, Fluff, Incest, Smut, Fili/Kili.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,244 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 109 - Follows: 13 - Published: 3/3/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Made and Remade the Necklace of Songs by littleblackdog reviews
Soulmate AU; Thorin/Bilbo romance. In a Middle Earth where dwarves dream of Heartsongs and hobbits carry the name of their fated partner as private Mark, Bilbo Baggins had never been able to properly translate the strange rows of runes inscribed on his wrist. And likewise, Thorin Oakenshield had never imagined he would hear the voice of his Heartsong from a fussy little hobbit.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 20,433 - Reviews: 235 - Favs: 758 - Follows: 623 - Updated: 2/19/2013 - Published: 1/8/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin
Cocoon by shinigami714 reviews
Bilbo dances, and unknowingly entrances, for a prompt on the hobbit kink meme. Thorin/Bilbo, Fili/Kili, Dwalin/Ori
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,279 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 244 - Follows: 24 - Published: 2/7/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B., Fili, Kili - Complete
Dire-Hobbits by justalotoffeelings reviews
They were both very small the first time they heard about hobbits. Fili, of course, saw it as an opportunity for mischief. So when his little brother asked him, face alight with curiosity, what a hobbit was, there was absolutely no hesitation.
Hobbit - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,329 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 2/6/2013 - Published: 1/20/2013 - Kili, Fili
Sanbaruf by shinigami714 reviews
Thorin's company is separated in a snow storm atop the misty mountains. This is a slight AU where certain events don't happen and even a small catalyst, like a change in the weather can distort future realities. Thorin/Bilbo, Dwalin/Ori, Fili/Kili, Angst, violence, hurt/comfort, smut, profanity, fluff.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 15,442 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 271 - Follows: 37 - Published: 2/5/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B., Dwalin, Ori - Complete
Hopscotch by casgetoutofmyassbutt reviews
Allen has a terrible sense of direction, so terrible that he gets lost in the airport and gets on the wrong plane! There he meets a plane sick, japanese man who changes Allen's life. for the better? or for the worse? Rated M, Yaoi, Yullen
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 36,801 - Reviews: 194 - Favs: 187 - Follows: 114 - Updated: 2/5/2013 - Published: 6/30/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
The Best Advice by Loki's-Phantom-x reviews
Bilbo wants to seduce Thorin so he asks the people closest to him, even though he is embarrassed to do so. Fili and Kili are eager to help out their burglar and, even though he finds the advice slightly disturbing, he finds it works to his advantage. Thorin/Bilbo; Fili/Kili. R&R, x. This fiction could be the start of a series but is yet undecided.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,282 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 26 - Published: 2/4/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Light & Life by StormWarning27 reviews
After Smaug drove the dwarves from Erebor, Thorin was determined to guide and protect his people. Raising his nephews, Fili & Kili, was one task he had not expected to inherit. My take on the years before "The Hobbit". Combined Book & Movie verse, probably more of the movie though. Slightly AU due to some timeline butchering, no slash. Rated T for violence in later chapters.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Family/Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 18,466 - Reviews: 221 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 239 - Updated: 1/29/2013 - Published: 12/27/2012 - Fili, Kili
Rara Avis by shinigami714 reviews
Bilbo is taken captive at a young age by Smaug, who confuses the hobbit for a princess. An AU based a bit on classic tales of dragons. Thorin/Bilbo with Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Violence, Gore, Fluff, and Smut.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14,798 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 343 - Follows: 45 - Published: 1/29/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
Checkmate by Ferowyn reviews
Hobbit Kink Meme Prompt: Thorin wants to raise Fili as his heir and Kili has to stay with his mother. WARNING: Incest
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 17,593 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 1/28/2013 - Published: 1/20/2013 - [Kili, Fili] - Complete
A Racing Problem by Black Hawk reviews
"Go! Go! Go!" Fili bellowed, whishing he was allowed to chase his brother, threating bodily harm as they did in their training sessions.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,897 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 10 - Published: 1/26/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
The Hunt by Artisticnincompoop reviews
Every year Fili and Kili take part in a hunting trip with Thorin for their birthdays, this year there is a turn of events as they both start to show each other their long hidden feelings. (Please Review!)
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,568 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/25/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Paragon by shinigami714 reviews
Kili is used to being mocked for his looks, however when one particular dwarf joins in on the teasing, it becomes a bit too much to handle. Fili/Kili, Angst, Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff. Written for a prompt on the Hobbit Kink Meme.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,251 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 18 - Published: 1/23/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Arbutus by shinigami714 reviews
After the encounter with Azog, Thorin is smitten with the hobbit and does his best the court him with manly and majestic deeds. Unfortunately all of his attempts seem to fail hard. Thorin/Bilbo, Angst, Fluff, Written for a prompt on the Hobbit Kink Meme.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,295 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 253 - Follows: 20 - Published: 1/22/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
Growing Next To You by Artisticnincompoop reviews
Kili's beard at last starts to grow. When he and Fili go out to celebrate Fili's jealously gets the better of him and Kili does not fail to notice. (M)
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,676 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/20/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Making a baby by JuuChanStar reviews
This is a side story to my chapter Thorin/Bilbo ficiton 'How to shock a king'. Just smut between Fili and Kili.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,171 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 15 - Published: 1/20/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Torpor by shinigami714 reviews
A companion piece to 'Grasshopper'. Dwalin reflects on his growing feelings for a certain dwarf and his inability to do much about it. Dwalin/Ori, Smut, UST, Angst.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,100 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 9 - Published: 1/19/2013 - Dwalin, Ori - Complete
May or may not by St.Alya reviews
Thirteen individual views on their relationship.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,746 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 12 - Published: 1/18/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Hollow by shinigami714 reviews
Hobbits on average eat six, sometimes seven meals a day. Bilbo struggles with eating drastically less than this while on the journey to Erebor and at the same time does not wish to show his weakness. Thorin/Bilbo, Starvation, Hurt/Comfort, Angst.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,378 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 487 - Follows: 71 - Published: 1/17/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
Stood Up by Elithiul reviews
Kili has a new girlfriend, but soon finds himself heartbroken and looking towards his older brother Fili for comfort. {Durincest}
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,362 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/16/2013 - Kili, Fili - Complete
Grasshopper by shinigami714 reviews
Hobbits are one of the softer creatures of Middle Earth. They have no qualms with their emotions and enjoy the simple things in life, like romance and love. Dwarven customs differ greatly, their emotions often kept on the inside. What happens when the two mix? Thorin/Bilbo, Fili/Kili, Smut, Angst, Incest, Hints at Mpreg and D/s relationships.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,665 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 484 - Follows: 53 - Published: 1/15/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B., Fili, Kili - Complete
Memories of Passion: One Night with the King by stickdonkey reviews
Their first night in Laketown, Thorin decided to show Bilbo just how much he appreciates everything he has done for the company in a very intimate way. Thilbo Bagginshield. The "missing" scene from both Memories: Beautiful and Painful Things but can be read without having read Memories.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,218 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 128 - Follows: 18 - Published: 1/14/2013 - [Thorin, Bilbo B.] - Complete
A Bead of Silver by ThePotterMalfoyProblem reviews
A short bittersweet tale of love that lasts through time, told through the eyes of Frodo Baggins. Thorin/Bilbo (Thilbo) SLASH Rated T because people think relationships are controversial. Only a slight bit angsty, I promise. *bookverse*
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 892 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 11 - Published: 1/14/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
How to Offend a Hobbit by Sakrea reviews
Thorin Oakenshield finds out the hard way that sharing even the smallest details of a hobbit's relationship might get him upset. Bilbo/Thorin Implied movieverse
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,874 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 1/14/2013 - Published: 12/29/2012 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
Fourteen Pieces of Unsolicited AdviceAnd One Time Thorin Asked by cc62827 reviews
"Enough!" I interrupted sharply, drawing myself up to my full height and laying a hand on the hilt of my sword. "Listen to me very carefully. No one touches the Hobbit." I let my eyes harden. "Anyone who tries will answer to me."
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,321 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 302 - Follows: 240 - Updated: 1/14/2013 - Published: 12/19/2012 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Chemistry 101 by DarkPhoenix168 reviews
Allen Walker is a new student at Black Order University, where he meets Yuu Kanda, a demonic-like third year. Allen finds out quickly that it's not just the chemicals that are causing reactions. Yullen yaoi.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 16 - Words: 45,341 - Reviews: 353 - Favs: 323 - Follows: 223 - Updated: 1/13/2013 - Published: 4/25/2012 - [Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker] - Complete
Five Armies and a Wedding by MadAsRabbits9 reviews
Fili makes a decision. A decision that he wants Kili to be his. But his timing isn't great when he decides to ask the "big question".
Hobbit - Rated: K - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 769 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/13/2013 - Kili, Fili - Complete
And all the what-ifs by Ferowyn reviews
What if you could go back in time, and relive one day, one hour, one moment? What if you could go back in time, and take all those hours of pain and darkness and replace them with something better? WARNING: Incest
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,232 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/13/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Cornered by Soyna reviews
Sephiroth has to contend with Reno during a mission. A flirty, flirty Reno.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 14,451 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 1/12/2013 - Published: 12/16/2012 - Reno, Sephiroth - Complete
Matters of Vital Importance by OnyxBird reviews
Kili is delirious and determined to carry out some very important tasks. Bilbo proves his talent in handling a delusional dwarf.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,305 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 195 - Follows: 27 - Published: 1/11/2013 - Kili, Bilbo B. - Complete
Part of the plan by Ferowyn reviews
Hobbit Kink Meme Prompt: Kili likes being dominated by Fili. He loves it, in fact. However, he is absolutely 100% against having anal sex. Fili, unfortunately, isn't. WARNING: Incest
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,781 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/11/2013 - [Kili, Fili] - Complete
Unfulfilled by Thorny Hedge reviews
Thorin wants Fili, Fili loves Kili, but Kili desires his uncle. Fantasizing and some hot dwarven lovin' to boot. Thorin/Kili, Fili/Kili, Thorin/Fili. Durincest! You have been sufficiently warned.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,292 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/11/2013 - Fili, Thorin - Complete
Close to the flame by Lilja Rainheart reviews
For as long as Fili remembered, his brother had always been with him. Any memories from before Kili's birth apparently hadn't been important enough to keep in memory. Since then the brothers had never been apart, not even for a day. Fili/Kili (and therefore sibling incest; don't like, don't read).
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,421 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/8/2013 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Stomach Tied in Knots by The Emcee reviews
Thorin has been pushing his feelings for Bilbo away ever since he fell in love with him. But not being able to be with the one he loves has been driving him insane and he decides to make his move. Thilbo with very, very mild, barely even there Kili/Bilbo. Slash. One-shot.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,288 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/7/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Just One Chance, Just One Breath by Anath Tsurugi reviews
Just in case there's just one left...What if Thorin's fate could be changed? What price would have to be paid in the end? (Movie-verse, with spoilers for the book. Character Death. BagginShield.)
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,959 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 23 - Published: 1/7/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
A Girly Problem by Black Hawk reviews
"Allow me to put things into perspective," Fili offered, rolling onto his stomach and peering at his brother's profile. "Though you don't remember it… it's not the first time you've been mistaken for… something else." Sequel to A Manly Problem, but can also be read alone.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,900 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 17 - Published: 1/6/2013 - Kili, Fili - Complete
Messy Little Raindrops by I-Have-A-Dark-Side reviews
Outtakes from A Drop in the Ocean... It was just her luck, Paul's imprint turned up and then to top it all off, Sam's brother imprinted on her. This is what happened...
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,057 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 121 - Follows: 226 - Updated: 1/5/2013 - Published: 12/3/2012 - Paul, Bella
Malady by Ziggy Pasta reviews
As tragedy plagues a young Cloud, he turns to Zack for a source of comfort and strength. As their relationship turns intimate, Cloud slowly develops a strange illness that may leave him broken and amnesic to the life he once shared with Zack. ZackXCloud
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 57 - Words: 365,340 - Reviews: 1034 - Favs: 382 - Follows: 323 - Updated: 1/3/2013 - Published: 8/20/2009 - Zack F., Cloud S.
To Have and To Hold by WickedForGood13 reviews
In the aftermath of the battle, Bilbo runs away, thinking that Thorin is dead. However, when he is dragged back to camp by his Dwarven companions, some surprising revelations are made...
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,067 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 159 - Follows: 35 - Published: 1/3/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Bound By the Falling Rain by WhispersOfStarlight reviews
'There are two kinds of sparks, the one that goes off with a hitch like a match, but it burns quickly. The other is the kind that needs time, but when the flame strikes... it's eternal.' Timothy Oliveira
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,579 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/2/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
The Troubles of Kings by An Odd Ducky reviews
By the time the company reaches Mirkwood, Thorin Oakenshield is going insane with the indecent thoughts of a certain hobbit that his mind keeps conjuring. He thinks he has a solution, but the plans of kings do not always go as expected, and hearts are difficult things to understand, especially when you don't know your own. Fill for the Hobbit Kink Meme.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,149 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 188 - Follows: 23 - Published: 1/2/2013 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
A Manly Problem by Black Hawk reviews
Kili prowled around the base of the pine, his eyes scanning its lowest branches like a cat hunting out the best place to land. Fili sprinted into a jog as soon as he recognized his little brother's behavior. He knew from experience that once Kili was in a tree, there was no getting him out of it until he was ready.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,628 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 17 - Published: 1/1/2013 - Kili, Fili - Complete
The Heart of a King by shinigami714 reviews
After leaving the goblin cave, Bilbo doesn't remove the ring from his finger, unaware of its powers. Thorin's company doesn't see his return, and Bilbo watches as they discuss his abandonment of them. Thorin/Bilbo, Sex, Violence, Angst. Written for a prompt on the Hobbit Kink Meme.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,890 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 304 - Follows: 42 - Published: 12/31/2012 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
I Will Be There by Loki's-Phantom-x reviews
Bilbo Baggins knew the braiding of hair and beards between dwarves was a loving gesture, whether family or lovers. Bilbo wants to try it out to see if a certain dwarf king returns his feelings. Thorin/Bilbo, very mild Fili/Kili. I apologise if anyone is OOC, first Hobbit fic. R&R, x.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,373 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 225 - Follows: 29 - Published: 12/30/2012 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
Blast It All by Triola reviews
In which Gandalf finds a cave, the Dwarves show some skin, Thorin is annoying, and Bilbo curses the world. Bagginshield. Oneshot.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,978 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 25 - Published: 12/30/2012 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
From hate to love by Ferowyn reviews
Hobbit Kink Meme Prompt: Since they were younger Fili and Kili were always fighting and their mother didn't know what to do about it. Thorin has enough of their fighting and sends them on an adventure. Alone. Right before the one concerning the hobbit. WARNING: Incest
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,946 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/29/2012 - [Kili, Fili] - Complete
Brothers Be by shinigami714 reviews
Fili and Kili hate each other with a passion and fight constantly as a result. Thorin, annoyed at their stupidity sends the brothers on a task with the hope that they will solve their issues. Fili/Kili, Written for a prompt on the Hobbit Kink Meme.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,009 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 16 - Published: 12/28/2012 - Fili, Kili - Complete
Caught in the act by Ferowyn reviews
Hobbit Kink Meme. Prompt: Five times they got caught in the act and were advised to end their relationship, and one time they got the person's blessing. WARNING: Incest
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,104 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 15 - Published: 12/26/2012 - [Fili, Kili] - Complete
Blended In Measure by littleblackdog reviews
Small stories set along the journey to Erebor, about a king without a mountain, an honest burglar, and the fine company they keep. Here there be book and (2012) movie spoilers, and eventually dragons. Or at least one dragon. Also, a smattering of Thorin/Bilbo romance.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 9,730 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 259 - Updated: 12/26/2012 - Published: 12/16/2012 - Bilbo B., Thorin
As You Love Me by shinigami714 reviews
Kili falls in love with his brother but fears Fili's reaction, and so he suffers and keeps it to himself, until a certain moment. Fili/Kili, character death
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,687 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 7 - Published: 12/22/2012 - Fili, Kili - Complete
The Tenderness of a King by shinigami714 reviews
Fili and Kili out Bilbo as a virgin embarrassing him in front of the other dwarves. One dwarf intends to rectify the situation. Thorin/Bilbo fluffiness, First Time. Written for a prompt on the LJ Hobbit Kink Meme.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,974 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 504 - Follows: 60 - Published: 12/21/2012 - Thorin, Bilbo B. - Complete
Delicate by DeathTrapDaisy reviews
Being raised amongst rough and tough dwarves, Thorin knows how to appreciate something delicate when he sees it. Something like Bilbo. :Thorin/Bilbo:
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,218 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 212 - Follows: 18 - Published: 12/17/2012 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Home by DeathTrapDaisy reviews
It was the moment Bilbo shared what home meant to him that Thorin understood the phrase 'home is where your heart is.' It was after Bilbo saved his life that he realized his heart was with Bilbo. Thorin/Bilbo
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,456 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 21 - Published: 12/15/2012 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
The Puppet Master by Glitch in the System reviews
What's eating Paul? What's with that flame on the water? What was Laurent doing just standing in Edward and Bella's meadow? Why does Edward care about Mike's car? Why doesn't Alice know about her past? Cammy knows.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 86 - Words: 459,087 - Reviews: 4703 - Favs: 1,873 - Follows: 1,562 - Updated: 12/13/2012 - Published: 3/24/2008
Queen of the Dwarves by PotatoCrumbs reviews
"I think congratulations are in order!" Bilbo/Thorin. Humor. Ficlet.
Hobbit - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 645 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 450 - Follows: 85 - Published: 12/12/2012 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Rogue by Openhome reviews
Rogue is the continuation of Coalescence. It is Alice and especially Jasper's journey through the Twilight Saga. Jasper's past intermingles with his present as he comes to terms with himself and his choices.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 68,811 - Reviews: 396 - Favs: 223 - Follows: 258 - Updated: 12/4/2012 - Published: 1/10/2011 - Alice, Jasper
A Drop in the Ocean by I-Have-A-Dark-Side reviews
The Cullen's left and she survived, she turns to Jacob and falls in love with him and the Pack. But then when Jacob imprints what is left of Bella and who will be there to help her when the one that made her whole was the one tearing her apart!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 51,850 - Reviews: 1207 - Favs: 754 - Follows: 708 - Updated: 12/3/2012 - Published: 2/7/2012 - Bella, Paul - Complete
After 126 Years by Obscurity Within Mercy reviews
It's been 126 years since the contract was formed. After all this time, where are they now?
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 18,528 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 10/9/2012 - Published: 12/5/2011 - Ciel P., Sebastian M.
Shikigami by Erendyce reviews
Though being an Exorcist, Allen can't bring himself to summon a shikigami to serve him, because of his deep hatred towards any kind of demons and spirits. Until he accidentally summons a powerful demon by the name of Kanda. Yullen.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 29 - Words: 163,459 - Reviews: 1429 - Favs: 1,115 - Follows: 570 - Updated: 8/31/2012 - Published: 5/21/2009 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Doing The Right Thing by Stephycats7785 reviews
Edward finds Leah alone in the woods and while reading her mind he stumbles onto her dirty secret. Seeing as how Leah has nobody to help her in this situation Edward realizes he must man up and do the right thing since Sam won't.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 71 - Words: 109,514 - Reviews: 1580 - Favs: 350 - Follows: 258 - Updated: 7/28/2012 - Published: 3/10/2010 - Leah, Edward - Complete
Behind Blue Eyes by stephvanie reviews
For Cloud, it's hard when youre highly educated and not wanting to admit your sexuality to your friends and family. Mondays used to start the same until one day he's assinged to tutor. But the student is a juvenile who happens to be Zack Fair.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 39 - Words: 161,598 - Reviews: 466 - Favs: 257 - Follows: 159 - Updated: 6/28/2012 - Published: 3/31/2010 - Cloud S., Zack F. - Complete
The Bet by Anello di Tempesta reviews
Reborn proposed a bet. A bet in which the semes cannot touch their ukes in any way; they can only look and talk to them. The ukes, however, are free to 'seduce' their semes. Just how much self-control do these semes have? 182769, 8059, RL, 10051, XS, B26. Mature themes.
Katekyo Hitman Reborn! - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 18,018 - Reviews: 286 - Favs: 376 - Follows: 400 - Updated: 6/22/2012 - Published: 9/14/2011 - K. Hibari, Mukuro R., Reborn, Tsuna/Tsunayoshi S.
A nightly lesson by secret-wildcard reviews
As a member of the Phantomhive household, Sebastian considers it inacceptable that Snake seems unable to talk without the aid of his snake companions, thus decideds to give him special lessons. Sebastian x Snake
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,606 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 129 - Follows: 110 - Updated: 6/16/2012 - Published: 12/21/2010 - Sebastian M., Snake
YULLEN WEEK! by KingRabbit reviews
come on, need I say anymore? it's yullen week people. yaoi, yullen, not for minor's. tch, yeah cuz that actually matters to people.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 36,570 - Reviews: 125 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 6/8/2012 - Published: 12/17/2011 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Blood and Lust by Starisia the Shadow Demon reviews
The boy's breathing and heartbeat became erratic as he tried to take in enough air to scream, but with every breath, every beat of his frantic heart, his vision grew darker, leaving him at the demons mercy... Vampire!Kanda. Yullen. M for later chapters. ((BEING REWRITTEN. REWRITTEN VERSION IS 'Sangue e Lussuria'))
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 34,334 - Reviews: 180 - Favs: 164 - Follows: 239 - Updated: 5/30/2012 - Published: 8/24/2011 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
And So The Lioness Ate The Lamb by Escaped Psychos reviews
An adaption of kenzerooni's "Ever After". Lily thought her best friend died long ago. She thought he died in that hospital back in Chicago after they had shared their feelings. Well, she was wrong. He's back, but he might as well be gone. Bella/Edward/OC
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,839 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 2/22/2012 - Published: 9/26/2011 - Edward
How To Use A Wall by Allodola reviews
For the LJ kink meme. Reborn 'molests' Tsuna. Against the wall.
Katekyo Hitman Reborn! - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,638 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 27 - Published: 2/17/2012 - Tsuna/Tsunayoshi S., Adult Reborn - Complete
British Pansy by KingRabbit reviews
It's Valentines day and Kanda is surprisingly good at making sweets despite his apparent loathing for them. They dance, they drink, they laugh. "Tch. Pansy." "Pansy?" "You know, like the flower." yaoi, yullen, lavilena. don't like, don't read...
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,444 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/14/2012 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker - Complete
A Tangible Dichotomy by PerfectlyPersuasive reviews
Not everything makes sense to us at first, but sometimes, the paradoxes in life are exactly what we never knew we needed. When Jasper and Edward are thrown together, into a dorm room no less, who are they to deny the twisted logic of fate? AH/Slash.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 33 - Words: 200,890 - Reviews: 3464 - Favs: 1,227 - Follows: 1,133 - Updated: 2/5/2012 - Published: 9/29/2009 - Edward, Jasper - Complete
Set Fire to the Third Bar by KingRabbit reviews
two-shot. Allen drops by kanda's place after five years of being apart. can almost be a continuation for my yullen entry for starlight... yullen, yaoi. Rated M to be safe.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,944 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/5/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
My Shiny Freak by prettyflour reviews
Bella with some backbone. A cynical smart ass who attracts the attention of the local brooding vampire, Edward Cullen. AU/OOC. Rated M for strong snark and lemons galore. Nominated for three Tomato Soup Awards!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 31 - Words: 130,332 - Reviews: 612 - Favs: 590 - Follows: 394 - Updated: 12/16/2011 - Published: 5/3/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
To die would be an awfully big adventure by EricaJaney reviews
We've followed Bella's story in the books. Now it's time to see the Cullen's stories before Bella. Starting with Carlisle Cullen, their founder, their leader, and the soul of their coven. Following through Edward, Esme, Rosalie, Emmett, Alice and Jasper.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 9 - Words: 13,611 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 12/9/2011 - Published: 8/29/2011 - Carlisle, Edward
Wish of confusion, wish for solution by Stranger-of-the-void reviews
Still confused Allen refuses to give an answer, making Kanda desperate. In this chaos of feelings,when something happens to him, will Kanda be able to save him in time, with the help of an person he last expected to help? FOR TIME BEING ON HIATUS, SORRY
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 21,073 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 12/6/2011 - Published: 7/6/2011 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker
How the Order Found Out About Yullen by Arin Blaire reviews
And that is how the Order found out about Yullen.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 694 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 213 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 12/4/2011 - Published: 6/28/2010 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Dance with the Devil by Caeli13 reviews
Akira is trapped and Shiki would want to play more with him as the time wears by. How would it end for the two enemies? Yaoi, peepz, in coming!
Togainu no Chi/咎狗の血 - Rated: M - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,918 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 8 - Published: 12/3/2011 - Akira, Shiki - Complete
Don't cry, Baby by Insert a Catchy Penname Here reviews
When Renesmee is crying, Edward helps make her feel better. Totally humorous and fluffy!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,392 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/2/2011 - Edward, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
Mirror's Show What the Heart Truly Feels by KingRabbit reviews
Allen and Kanda receive a mission to find innocence WAY up north. Allen gets sick and they are forced to stay in an old hunting cabin. what are the chances that the object they seek just happens to be there as well? yullen, yaoi, one-shot, please review..
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,799 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 14 - Published: 11/29/2011 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Tripped by Soyna reviews
Genesis has some real issues with Zack. Angeal is tired of him sabotaging his students progress so he shows Genesis that he is the only one that he considers worth his special attention. NC-17
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,746 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/18/2011 - Genesis R., Angeal H. - Complete
First Blush by liragreen reviews
What if Bella wasn't the first? When he died in 1918, Edward lost the girl he'd planned to marry and left behind the life they'd shared for a new, cold future.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,310 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 11/14/2011 - Published: 11/10/2011 - Edward - Complete
BellaSitting with the Cullens by Elise Penn reviews
When Bella gets hurt by having too much fun, Edward puts her on ultimate lockdown mode. The Cullens take turns bellasitting her! Extremely funny and worth reading. PLEASE REVIEW Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, it belongs to Stephanie Meyers.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 21,234 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 11/12/2011 - Published: 5/28/2009 - Bella
I Felt Hope: An Alice and Jasper Story by Alchemyofanaccident reviews
The story of Alice and Jasper's first meeting all the way up until they find the Cullens.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 17 - Words: 228,531 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 14 - Published: 11/12/2011 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
Renesmee's First Date by TwilightIsGreat reviews
Renesmee has her first date. This is Edwards thoughts on it.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 421 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 4 - Published: 11/10/2011 - Edward - Complete
Rumor Has It by KingRabbit reviews
Allen finds out Lavi cheated on him and they break up. After Spending a night in Kanda's bed, he decides that its where he belongs. and even with rumors flying arund, they hold strong to each other. yullen, AU, yaoi, swearing. plz review
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,305 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 225 - Follows: 14 - Published: 11/9/2011 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
going nowhere, going somewhere by Estora reviews
Edward, and self-discovery. Bella taught him how to love; his new college roommate may just be the one to teach him how to live. The twenty-first century, Edward is beginning to realise, is actually kind of...awesome.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 13,171 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 148 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 11/5/2011 - Published: 9/24/2010 - Edward - Complete
Halloween Treats by KingRabbit reviews
Allen and Kanda meet at a club on halloween and decide to go home together. yullen, yaoi, a bit of drinking, kanda threatening someone for touching allen.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,989 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 11 - Published: 10/28/2011 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
True First Sight: Emmett and Rosalie by Melissa S Kosciuszko reviews
While working on the railroad, Emmett catches a glimpse of a beautiful flash of blond hair and sparkling skin. Only Edward realizes the angel that saved Emmett's father is Rosalie. O/S
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,445 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 5 - Published: 10/24/2011 - Edward, Rosalie - Complete
3 Yullen Themes by Chi Haku reviews
Three little inspections on what could be the relationships of Kanda Yu and Allen Walker.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,368 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/18/2011 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
True First Sight: Carlisle and Esme by Melissa S Kosciuszko reviews
Edward watches as Carlisle changes Esme and listens as Carlisle remembers first seeing her 10 years prior. O/S
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,311 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/2/2011 - Edward, Carlisle - Complete
Promotion by Soyna reviews
Genesis gets promoted and the person he most wanted to be there for him is not and he finds comfort in familiar comfortable arms.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,081 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 11 - Published: 9/21/2011 - Genesis R., Angeal H. - Complete
The Art of Sibling Rivalry by Carson Dyle reviews
It's the 1930s. Carlisle and Esme are ready to spread the love by welcoming a fourth member to the Cullen clan. She's young. She's blonde. She's beautiful. What could possibly go wrong? And would a fifth addition make things better or worse?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,560 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/15/2011 - Edward - Complete
History Lessons by Carson Dyle reviews
2nd Place Canon Tour pre-Twi Something is making it difficult for Edward to concentrate in class. Will turning to his siblings for help do any good? Will history repeat itself, or is it possible that the only history that matters has yet to begin?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,643 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 9 - Published: 9/15/2011 - Edward - Complete
You Were Here by Soyna reviews
Reno is forced to go on a mission and has a run in with a ice storm, a chocobo and Cloud. Please heed the warnings at the beginning of the chapter.
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,108 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 7 - Published: 8/26/2011 - Cloud S., Reno - Complete
Hold Your Breath by Born This Way Contest reviews
: After stumbling across a blue fog filled hallway, Jasper can't stop saying exactly what he thinks. Lordy. The boy has no verbal filter. None. *shakes head* WARNING: Jizz. *Entry for the Born This Way Contest*
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,633 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 8 - Published: 8/24/2011 - Edward, Jasper - Complete
Not Another Twilight Parody by Feeding-The-Wolves reviews
The epic Twilight saga, complete with sparkly vampires, hot shirtless werewolves and one stupid human. Now with FREE swearing and sexual references!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,646 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 8/19/2011 - Published: 5/22/2011 - Complete
Brave New World by Born This Way Contest reviews
Jasper recounts his firsts with the love of his life. *Entry for the Born This Way Contest*
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,411 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 10 - Published: 8/17/2011 - Jasper, Edward - Complete
Turn the Page by Timeless Moment reviews
Birthday fic for DetectiveBubbles: It's when you open your eyes only to see a character from a book that you've been reading standing in front of you, that you know you must have finally lost your mind. Yullen.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,783 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/12/2011 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker - Complete
Tease by Soyna reviews
It all starts with a drinking contest between Reno and Cloud. Zack has to take care of a drunk Cloud. Yaoi warning...Tease warning...ZxC...a little bit of Reno taunting/torture, a little Rufus and a tad of Sephiroth...the whole story is a tease. COMPLETE
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 61 - Words: 258,679 - Reviews: 1162 - Favs: 466 - Follows: 286 - Updated: 8/1/2011 - Published: 7/31/2009 - Cloud S., Zack F. - Complete
100 Questions Given to Allen and Kanda by rainyRay reviews
Just a little Humorous thing. 100 questions given to Allen and Kanda. Yullen. Enjoy.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,293 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 8 - Published: 7/26/2011 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Secret Santa Cullen Style by Mommy's Little Broadway Star reviews
What happens when Carlisle and Esme try to get the kids into the holiday spirit? My first fanfic! Rated T just to be safe.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 10 - Words: 8,503 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 7/22/2011 - Published: 12/29/2008 - Edward, Bella
headset by p0l-anka reviews
a one shot story of how Kanda and Allen ended up together with the help of a battery-emptied mp3, and a nagging Lenalee. YULLEN.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,321 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 7/18/2011 - Published: 12/13/2010 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker - Complete
Project H: Eclipse by Project H reviews
A direct parody of the third Twilight movie
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,496 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 7/17/2011 - Published: 5/22/2011
Every Dog Has His Day by Kimmydonn reviews
Documenting the longest morning of Seth Clearwater's life. Seriously, have you ever thought about what that poor boy had to put up with? OMG. Entry in the Twilight Canon Fodder Challenge.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 14,146 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 7/15/2011 - Published: 5/10/2010 - Seth - Complete
20 Ways To Annoy People In A Plane by UndeCideD94 reviews
when the Cullens go for a trip around the world and alice gets bored what happens? she takes emmetts advice thats what. join them in their games on the plane. will it be put to an end before it begins or will it be just what the doctor ordered?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 11,561 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 7/14/2011 - Published: 11/4/2010
Insanity by Joel 7th reviews
Their lust, fueled by death. Their love, covered in blood. Their insanity matched perfectly like two sides of a mirror.
Togainu no Chi/咎狗の血 - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,427 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 6/26/2011 - Published: 6/16/2011 - Shiki, Akira - Complete
Baka Neko by Joel 7th reviews
What's Toshima's strongest charisma's greatest enemy ? If your answer is N then you can guess again. A crack fic which involves Shiki chasing a cat and getting scratched by it. ShikiXAkira
Togainu no Chi/咎狗の血 - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,100 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 5 - Published: 6/4/2011 - Shiki, Akira - Complete
Akita by Alex Prosper reviews
After their last battle, Shiki follows Akira home and takes advantage of his fatigue, fleshing out a deep, hidden desire. One-shot. Hard yaoi. SPOILER alert!
Togainu no Chi/咎狗の血 - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,488 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 265 - Follows: 31 - Published: 5/16/2011 - Akira, Shiki - Complete
Intensity by Jaden Schwarz reviews
Kanda & Allen are going at each other's throat as usual, though lately things seem to get worse whenever they meet. With the interference of their friends, will they end up killing each other or..? And there's Cross too, meddling & creating confusion!
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 29,565 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 4/1/2011 - Published: 9/10/2010 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
Days Passing By by a1y-puff reviews
It takes one hot summer day, one quiet library and one irritating, pretty prick to begin the unforgettable days for Allen to keep. But then, no Summer lasts forever. TEMPORARILY ON A HIATUS. Planned to be finished, though.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 35,113 - Reviews: 263 - Favs: 242 - Follows: 233 - Updated: 3/23/2011 - Published: 12/19/2010 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
Innocence Cafe by Sporadic.ambiguity reviews
What happens when Lavi takes notice of a mysterious frequent customer at a Cafe he worked at? Would sparks fly? LaviYuu Oneshot AU
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,435 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/16/2011 - Lavi, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Becoming SOLDIER by XoxStrifexoX reviews
Zack meets his new neighbor Cloud they quickly become friends & vow to join SOLDIER but can Zack&Cloud handle the training and abuse? And will their friendship strain or turn into something more...? PLEASE REVIEW
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 24 - Words: 71,345 - Reviews: 142 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 3/2/2011 - Published: 11/5/2008 - Zack F., Cloud S.
Valentine's Day by fallen-musician reviews
It's Valentine's Day at the Order, and everyone is celebrating in style—except for Kanda, who just can't seem to get any. A tale of sex barred, minds scarred, and soba marred. KandaxLavi/Yuvi.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,287 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/13/2011 - Kanda Yuu, Lavi - Complete
How My Life was Ruined in 14 Days by moon.witche reviews
Bella has a plan. It's a detailed plan for her whole life. But in her quest for perfection, she has skipped certain high school experiences. With graduation fast approaching, Bella concocts a new plan – a plan to lose her virginity. BxE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 62,366 - Reviews: 3761 - Favs: 3,689 - Follows: 3,251 - Updated: 2/3/2011 - Published: 9/15/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Wish of love, wish of sin by Stranger-of-the-void reviews
Allen doesn't like Kanda. Not even a bit.Even when he starts to have those dreams about him, he still refuses to admit his love for him, although this won't stop his body to long for him.Against his will the wish will fulfill itself...
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 41,091 - Reviews: 84 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 1/2/2011 - Published: 10/23/2010 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker - Complete
Final Fantasy Seven: Texts From Last Night by Soyna reviews
Inspired drabbles based on humorous texts messages from the TFLN. Strange and quirkly little stories that will include all eventually. Latest: Hey this one is at 100... go to the MORE version for MOAR!
Final Fantasy VII - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 100 - Words: 47,501 - Reviews: 716 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 77 - Updated: 11/26/2010 - Published: 1/3/2010
Coalescence by Openhome reviews
This is the sequel to my first story, Singularity. As a sequel, you need to read Singularity first to understand what is happening in this story. Coalescence follows Jasper and Alice from their meeting in the diner to their acceptance by the Cullens.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 207,563 - Reviews: 1239 - Favs: 520 - Follows: 273 - Updated: 11/26/2010 - Published: 10/12/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
Daddy's Princess by Crazy2010 reviews
When Piper gave birth to a non-magical daughter she was overjoyed but Melinda grew jealous and envious of her brothers powers. The powers they had were unthinkable driving Melinda completely insane until she did the most shocking thing ever. Murder.
Charmed - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 944 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/14/2010 - Piper H., Leo W.
Voodoo Dolls by chidoriamane reviews
Komui made a set of voodoo dolls of his favorite exorcists. However, he accidentally dropped two dolls when Reever called him. And guess who picked those two dolls… Why Jerry of course! Yullen
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,463 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 27 - Published: 10/31/2010 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
Meet the Master by a1y-puff reviews
Allen had to bring Kanda to meet Cross. And really? He didn't actually fancy the idea, but. *"You're sure you don't just-want to get into this idiot's pants?"* AU
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,071 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 7 - Published: 10/28/2010 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
First Time by mojo-jojo-b reviews
OS of Bella & Edward's first time on Isle Esme.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,588 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/17/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
To Kill a Sparkly Vamp by CeleryRox reviews
A collection of 50 Buffy vs Edward oneshots, ending with everyone's least favorite vamp staked, beheaded by a garden gnome, hit by ice cream truck, beaten with his own spine, and much more! TO BE CONTINUED VERY SOON. Caution: "Angel" characters too.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 41 - Words: 45,494 - Reviews: 242 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 10/1/2010 - Published: 4/8/2010 - Buffy S., Edward
If Yu Were Gay by fallen-musician reviews
All Kanda wanted to do was meditate in peace. All Lavi wanted to do was reassure his friend that it's normal to be gay.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,281 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/13/2010 - Lavi, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Becoming Edward Cullen by vamped4Edward reviews
A bashful farmboy w/ dreams of college & marriage faces a new world when both parents die & a strange doctor named Carlisle saves his life. Passion, thirst, rage: a concoction he struggles to maintain while leaving behind his human life & only love.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 32 - Words: 67,110 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 8/25/2010 - Published: 7/19/2010 - Edward, Tanya - Complete
Substitution by Morphine Dementia reviews
"It was either an invasion of clowns or a giant dog screwing a giant beachball, so either way it was evil and had to be stopped." Kinkmeme fill. Lavi discovers that Art of Kanda is not only suitable for taking pictures. Unfortunately, it makes noises. Squeaky noises. And, of course, certain homicidal bypassers will find it suspicious... CRACK, LaviDummy, KandaLavi, yaoi, language.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,002 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/10/2010 - Lavi, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Close Quarters by Meyham reviews
Suddenly, Lavi's little game took a sharp turn in a direction few others knew he swung. LaviYuu. For DGM kink meme request, accidental stimulation.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,285 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/15/2010 - Lavi, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Sensitivity by Erendyce reviews
Allen only wished he could feel Kanda's touch one more time, but all that was offered to him was a painful void. Slightly angsty and mature content. Yullen one-shot.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 15,317 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 164 - Follows: 16 - Published: 5/30/2010 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Singularity by Openhome reviews
She woke with no memory and had no maker. All she knew was thirst, and all she brought was death. Yet she had a choice. This is the complete story of Alice from her entry into the asylum to meeting Jasper. It is T for vampire violence, no sexual content.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Drama - Chapters: 34 - Words: 162,644 - Reviews: 496 - Favs: 572 - Follows: 119 - Updated: 4/20/2010 - Published: 8/12/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
Dark Side of the Moon by blondie AKA robin reviews
New Moon from Edward's POV. Witness how Edward agonized over leaving Bella, hunted for Victoria, faced the Volturi, and came to realize that with Bella was where he was meant to be.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 176,408 - Reviews: 2529 - Favs: 3,308 - Follows: 1,457 - Updated: 2/26/2010 - Published: 5/23/2008 - Edward - Complete
Geeks In Love by Novelist Pup reviews
For Yullen Week. AU: The first time Allen Walker was cursed to meet social retard Yuu Kanda was on a Game Night Out held by mutual frienemy, Lavi. Sometimes, he suspects he might regret it.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 16,790 - Reviews: 271 - Favs: 354 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 1/22/2010 - Published: 6/4/2009 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker - Complete
Cullenary Educaton: Forks Sex Ed by MarcyJ reviews
Set at the End of Bella's Junior Year. Hilarity ensues when the Forks Gang is forced to endure Sex Education class with Coach Clapp. Chapter 1 is Jasper POV, and each subsequent chapter is from the perspective of a different character.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,726 - Reviews: 2122 - Favs: 3,528 - Follows: 1,643 - Updated: 8/28/2009 - Published: 4/2/2007
First Impressions by NoMoreThanUsual reviews
The day Bella went to the Cullens' home for the first time. Starting at Chapter 15 of Twilight from various Cullens' perspectives. This story is the behind the scenes look at the day Bella met the Cullens. What happened where Bella could not see them?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 5 - Words: 18,856 - Reviews: 338 - Favs: 400 - Follows: 306 - Updated: 8/10/2009 - Published: 7/22/2008 - Carlisle, Esme
When Dreams Come True by Afael Ishtar reviews
Allen did not know how he had ended up in this situation. Nevertheless he couldn't deny that he was enjoying it. Yullen.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,959 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 195 - Follows: 15 - Published: 7/15/2009 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Six Days to You by Erendyce reviews
Day 6: Night out. Kanda hated celebration as much as he hated dates. Multi-chapters story, not series of one-shots. For Yullen Week, so it's Yullen, obviously.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 12,511 - Reviews: 89 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 6/6/2009 - Published: 6/1/2009 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Seduction by blondie AKA robin reviews
Bella was intent on seducing Edward, but somehow he managed to get a ring on her finger. His side of the story may surprise you - or maybe it won't! Chapter 20 "Compromise" of eclipse from EPOV.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,917 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 449 - Follows: 85 - Published: 5/20/2009 - Edward, Bella
Seduction by Erendyce reviews
Latin: seducere "to lead astray to where one didn't intend to go". Kanda learns it while on missions with a certain silver-haired boy. Yullen one-shot.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,059 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 171 - Follows: 15 - Published: 4/12/2009 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
The Wild and Wacky Adventures of Edward in PE! by LindaRoo reviews
Hilarity ensues when Edward comes back at the end of New Moon and he and Alice get Mrs. Cope to change their schedules to put them in Bella's gym class. How can they appear human when their superhuman athletic aptitudes keep getting in the way?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 12 - Words: 74,371 - Reviews: 1969 - Favs: 2,216 - Follows: 1,674 - Updated: 3/9/2009 - Published: 2/27/2007
Yellow Submarine by Novelist Pup reviews
AU: One week ago, on March 11th, 1943, the godfors—honorable Admiral Marian Cross put them on this damned submarine. :Kanda/Allen/Lavi, CRACK
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,397 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 226 - Follows: 17 - Published: 3/2/2009 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker - Complete
A Right Jolly Old Elf by MarcyJ reviews
Emmett loses a bet and ends up on the wrong side of a Santa Suit. Written for blondieAKArobin for the support stacie stocking stuffer auction.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,971 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 18 - Published: 1/3/2009 - Edward - Complete
Notes by Llama Mama23 reviews
Edward and Bella are caught passing notes in class. The teacher has the note read to the class. A series of embarassing events ensues, including Edward in a trunk, Bella in a gas mask, Carlisle as Tarazn, and Emmett with blue hair.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 25,990 - Reviews: 2856 - Favs: 2,044 - Follows: 967 - Updated: 12/29/2008 - Published: 5/14/2007 - Complete
Make it Last by Novelist Pup reviews
Seven stories for Yullen Week. Seventh, Foreign theme. "Allen didn't see the problem. Even if it was a meal of the...bug variety, it was still quite delicious. Kanda was such a wimp at the most peculiar times."
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,932 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 179 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 12/24/2008 - Published: 12/18/2008 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker - Complete
This One Is A Memory by Lady Bracknell reviews
Tanya ruins Edward's evening. He can't find it within himself to mind.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,806 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/4/2008 - Edward, Tanya - Complete
With Great Restraint by blondie AKA robin reviews
A Breaking Dawn Missing Moment - At the wedding reception, Bella and Jacob discussed her honeymoon plans. At the same time, Edward dances with Tanya...and the same subject arises. This one-shot parallels pages 61-66 in Breaking Dawn.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,405 - Reviews: 109 - Favs: 208 - Follows: 44 - Published: 12/3/2008 - Edward, Tanya - Complete
Distraction by Im-a-tiger reviews
He knew it was a bad idea from the beginning; they were in public and his soba was getting cold. LavixKanda
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,374 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 5 - Published: 11/11/2008 - Kanda Yuu, Lavi - Complete
Bella's Bachelorette Bash by LindaRoo reviews
Alice throws Bella a surprise bachelorette party in a posh Portland penthouse, complete with sexy games, embarrassing gifts, tequila shots, a stripper named Emmett, and a night of clubbing. Rated M for sexual dialogue and adult situations.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 29,517 - Reviews: 676 - Favs: 460 - Follows: 517 - Updated: 10/22/2008 - Published: 6/28/2008 - Bella, Alice
A Changing Heart by blondie AKA robin reviews
Edward's experience during Bella's change. Parallels pages 355-378 in Breaking Dawn.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,793 - Reviews: 266 - Favs: 572 - Follows: 82 - Published: 8/19/2008 - Edward, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
November Naughtiness by Lances reviews
Yullen. SPOILER WARNING. Allen is forced to hide in Komui's bath tub with Kanda lying on top of him. And Kanda is a very naughty boy.. Oh yes, he is.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,583 - Reviews: 211 - Favs: 552 - Follows: 349 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker
Music Lessons by blondie AKA robin reviews
SPOILERS FOR BREAKING DAWN. A missing moment from the book, some fatherly bonding time. Fluffy one-shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,152 - Reviews: 199 - Favs: 364 - Follows: 47 - Published: 8/8/2008 - Edward, Jacob - Complete
You May Now Kiss the Bride by vjgm reviews
This is my version of the wedding starring then minister, Emmett Cullen. With Emmett in charge, you know that humor will be involved. How does Emmett handle this important job? Will he behave? Or will Bella and Edward kill him? ONESHOT of SILLINESS.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,887 - Reviews: 610 - Favs: 1,248 - Follows: 181 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Emmett
Fear by NoMoreThanUsual reviews
Summary: Bella’s courage does have its limits. The day Edward was dreading – the day in which Bella runs away screaming – has finally come. Jasper’s POV and Edward’s POV.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,912 - Reviews: 243 - Favs: 540 - Follows: 55 - Published: 6/21/2008 - Complete
Family Therapy Cullen Style by vjgm reviews
Carlisle has had it with the children's constant bickering so he sends the Cullen's to family therapy. Suicidal Edward,Bella's fear of committment, Alice addicted to shopping, Rosalie's hostility, Emmett and Japer's gambling..who will survive? FUNNY
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 69,221 - Reviews: 8290 - Favs: 7,409 - Follows: 1,694 - Updated: 5/15/2008 - Published: 11/10/2007 - Complete
The Funeral by Angeliss reviews
Edward and Jacob meet again, thirty years after the end of Eclipse, but the circumstances are not what anyone would wish. Switzerland! No character-bashing here.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,665 - Reviews: 92 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 17 - Published: 5/2/2008 - Jacob, Edward - Complete
Marriage by Madame Meg reviews
“Also, as you may or may not know, if you don't use protection during sexual activities now a days, it can kill you. Let me clarify myself for you, Edward. I am that protection, and I will kill you.” Charlie sets some ‘rules’ for Edward.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,117 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 187 - Follows: 43 - Published: 4/30/2008 - Charlie S., Edward - Complete
Brotherhood by blondie AKA robin reviews
The Cullen boys go hunting. Jasper can't stop quoting the Princess Bride, Emmett can't stop quoting Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and Edward, rather put out, responds with Shakespeare. Hilarity ensues! Cowritten with the awesomely funny LindaRoo!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,198 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 272 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 4/13/2008 - Published: 3/31/2008 - Complete
Totality by blondie AKA robin reviews
Various stories from Eclipse written in Edward's POV. Newest addition: Spontaneous Combustion.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,277 - Reviews: 276 - Favs: 384 - Follows: 175 - Updated: 3/20/2008 - Published: 3/5/2008
Vampires And Technology Don't Mix by Just A Little Bit Dramatic reviews
[Gift for wrecking hotel rooms] What happens when all of the Cullen children and Bella go on a chatroom during class? What will they talk about? Rated T, as always, just to be safe...Chapter 3 Up!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,332 - Reviews: 313 - Favs: 220 - Follows: 185 - Updated: 1/21/2008 - Published: 4/1/2007
Allen's Brilliant Plan by EmpyrealFantasy reviews
[KandaAllen] Because Allen isn't gay. «Quite Crackish»
D.Gray-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,378 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 159 - Follows: 12 - Published: 11/19/2007 - Complete
My Brother and His Girlfriend by CuriosityKilledTheSquirrel reviews
When Bella gets sick one night while staying at the Cullen's house, Jasper, Lord of Emotions, gets new insight into hers and Edward's relationship. J's POV
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,877 - Reviews: 451 - Favs: 1,240 - Follows: 166 - Published: 9/21/2007 - Complete
Things You Should Never Do by Sadness-is-Beautiful reviews
50 things you should never, ever, ever do, as demonstrated by the good people...and vampires...and werewolves...of Forks.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 8,852 - Reviews: 584 - Favs: 231 - Follows: 213 - Updated: 9/10/2007 - Published: 3/1/2007
Unexpected Death by snapefreak reviews
The ultimate demise of voldemort.............My first story so all feedback is welcome
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 351 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 2 - Published: 7/24/2007 - Voldemort, Harry P. - Complete
Vampiric Peaches by Llama Mama23 reviews
Emmett decides to attempt to turn peaches into vampires. WARNING: Extremely pointless and stupid!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,813 - Reviews: 748 - Favs: 892 - Follows: 120 - Published: 5/31/2007 - Complete
The Birds & The Bees Emmett Style! by UnicornGoddess95 reviews
How does Bella get unglued from Edward? Find out and prepare to laugh! Complete for now...maybe I'll come up with more hilarity.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,515 - Reviews: 723 - Favs: 966 - Follows: 568 - Updated: 5/10/2007 - Published: 3/19/2007 - Complete
Summer Heat by Maiden of the Moon reviews
Reaching out, I snagged a fistful of his shirt and yanked it. Hard. As I did so, I gave him my demand: “Take off your clothes.” [BellaxEdward. NOT what you're probably thinking!]
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,496 - Reviews: 316 - Favs: 657 - Follows: 99 - Published: 1/31/2007 - Complete
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Two Birds and a Stone reviews
Two years after the crash of The Vengeance, Khan's sentence has been repealed. With an electrical chip in his head, ex-terrorist John Harrison will be sent aboard the Enterprise to work as a crewman. Slowly, the rest of the crew start to trust him. But will all of that be destroyed when one of Khan's family wakes up?
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,509 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 7/2/2013 - Published: 6/4/2013 - J. Kirk, Spock, L. McCoy/Bones, John Harrison/Khan
The Art of War and Words reviews
Bilbo and Thorin finally recognize their feelings for each other at Beorn's. But when Thorin's mind is enveloped with the gold sickness, he ignores something Bilbo is desperately trying to tell him, and their relationship crumbles. Rating might go up if continued. Thilbo.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 24,836 - Reviews: 135 - Favs: 155 - Follows: 193 - Updated: 2/14/2013 - Published: 1/14/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin
Death is Just Another Path reviews
I'd like to think that the first thing Bilbo heard when he reached the Undying Lands was the voices of some old friends. Maybe death really isn't so bad.
Hobbit - Rated: K - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,327 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 17 - Published: 2/13/2013 - Bilbo B., Frodo. B - Complete
Injuries reviews
Everything is as it should be: Gandalf is annoying Bilbo, Bilbo is making Thorin angry and Bilbo is muttering under his breath because of a certain dwarf king. But when something goes horribly wrong, all of this changes in a very unexpected way. The other T rated Thilbo I've been promising, R&R. This contains slash, don't like, don't read.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,764 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 116 - Follows: 17 - Published: 1/21/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
In the Water reviews
Bilbo stumbles upon Fili and Kili in a very compromising position. No, he doesn't want anything to do with that. But what will happen when he finds himself smack dab in the middle? Smut and threesomes, that's what. Fili/Kili/Bilbo, incest, sex, threesomes, maybe some OOCness.
Hobbit - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,328 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 1/10/2013 - Published: 1/7/2013 - Bilbo B. - Complete
Sleep reviews
The company finally gets to stay at a real inn, but for some odd reason, Bilbo can't sleep. Maybe Thorin can help.
Hobbit - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,090 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 12 - Published: 1/6/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Never Been So Wrong reviews
After Bilbo saves Thorin from Azog's minion, they start to realize they're seeing each other in different ways than before. Noticing how the other looks in the moonlight, or how the wind plays with their hair. When Thorin decides to teach Bilbo how to sword fight, will things turn out for better or for worse? Thilbo Bagginshield story, don't like don't read.
Hobbit - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,583 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 122 - Follows: 44 - Published: 1/2/2013 - Bilbo B., Thorin - Complete
Simply Yullen reviews
My first Yulllen Week entry! Hope you like; all themes are done, but only some optionals. Some are T rated, some are M. Romance, fluff, smut, you name it, it's in there. Enjoy!
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 17,918 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 1/1/2013 - Published: 12/19/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
A Change of Heart reviews
Edward and Bella have survived James, prom and Charlie and start their senior year at high school. Then Bella gets a letter from her best friend Lyra, saying she's moving back to Forks. What will happen between Bella and Jacob? Better yet, between Edward and this 'friend? Edward/OC not very much Edward/Bella for all the classics fans.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 64,413 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 7/30/2012 - Published: 2/16/2012 - Edward
New Life reviews
Lyra Valaryous is a Lycan that moves to the small town of Guiden, CA. There she meets a fellow Goth, mysterious loner, and a football player she could just kill. Balancing them, her secret life and surfacing human emotions is harder than she thought.
Underworld - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 23 - Words: 81,445 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 7/4/2012 - Published: 10/26/2010
Give It A Shot reviews
Set in modern times, Allen is off to college and has to find a way to balance his Akuma-slaying Innocence with everyday life. And what does his new room mate Kanda have to do with it? Read to find out! Not sure if I'm going to continue this, so review! WARNING: EVENTUAL YAOI!
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,613 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 18 - Published: 5/22/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu
Unsanitary reviews
Yuu and Allen are in a secret relationship when Kanda asks Allen to do something that Allen doesn't like. Will he do it? Of course he will! One-shot, rated M for A VERY GOOD REASON, don't like it, then don't read it! Yaoi, boyxboy, Yullen, everybody's favorite D.Gray-Man pairing! :D Enjoy and review!
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,119 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 3/5/2012 - Published: 1/15/2012 - Allen Walker, Kanda Yuu - Complete
Overheard reviews
When Allen comes to the Order, Kanda and him start their catatonic normal relationship. But when they both start to have feelings for each other, what will happen? Can they handle it? Rated M for swearing and yaoi. Contains Yullen, Lavlena and boyxboy
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 11,256 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 3/5/2012 - Published: 10/16/2011 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker - Complete
Dream Cum True reviews
Lavi likes Kanda. Kanda likes Lavi. So when they are sent on an exhausting mission, have to share a bed in a hotel, and Kanda has an embarrassing dream, how does Lavi react to all of this? Two-shot, rated M for yaoi, boyxboy. LavixKanda :D
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,821 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 3/5/2012 - Published: 2/28/2011 - Kanda Yuu, Lavi - Complete
Confessions reviews
Tyki and Allen always had a little secret: they're together. Now that the war is over, what will they do about it? And how will the other Noah react? WARNING: contains boyxboy, AU, yaoi, TykixAllen. Don't like don't read please! Some humor, but mostly fluff.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,203 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 3/5/2012 - Published: 7/30/2011 - Allen Walker, Tyki Mikk - Complete