Unending Enigma
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 05-26-10, id: 2378873, Profile Updated: 04-20-12


1.Do not introduce self as roleplaying character in public.

2.Do not talk to fictional characters in public.

3.Do not answer fictional characters in public.

4.Do not talk to inanimate objects in public.

5.Do not go out in public.

6.Disregard above note.Perform numbers 1 to 4.

7.Note expressions.

8.Don't die alone. Take many people with you.

9.Floor is slippery when wet.

10.Lakeis slippery when dry.

11.Only talk to strangers you know.

12.Strangers you don't know are spies... Kill them all.

13.For legal purposes be sure to delete above note.

14.Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you.

15.Kill them for security purposes.

16.Crying does not solve anything. Try violent mood swings.

17.Make a scene whenever humanly possible.

18.The men in white coats are not your friends.

19.Ask them for a room with lots of sharp, pointy objects.

20.When that doesn't work, ask for a designer jacket.

21.Chicken soup, although good for colds, is not the best cure for drowning.

22.Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing.

23.Unlike fine wine, milk does not get better with age.

24.Always remember, um... um... Damn.

25.Train army of flying monkeys.

26.Goldfish don't like milk.

27.Do not maim people. If you already have, kill them to avoid lawsuits.

28.Find out who invented the word "pianist".

29.People are staring at you.

30.So act insane.

31.People are weird, but not as weird as me.

32.Do not taunt animals at zoo. They have feelings... And teeth.

33.Little people are aggressive. Stay away from little people.

34.Going through other people's stuff is a bonding experiance. Do this as much as possible.

35.You'll sometimes notice shadows late at night. Don't worry. It's only me... Bonding.

36.Never pet a burning dog.

37.Never make eye contact with a naked man. Especially if you are wearing a parka.

38.Naked men dig parkas.

39.Beware the naked man who offers you his parka.

40.You know what would look good on you?

41.Immolated cockroaches.

42.Don't worry. It's only a harmless pimento bug.

43.The size of Danny DeVito.

44.Making an amusing facial expression. Like this.

45.Numbers are evil. Count in clovers.

46.Stalking is fun. Do it more.

47.Make a large sign saying, "Look at me, I'm a gumnut tree!"

48.No matter what anyone says, there is a way to get to your fantasy world.

49.That way is rum.

50.Constipated people don't give a sh-t.

52.You cannot kill the snow.

53.The snow can kill you.

54.Grass can also kill you.

55.The leprechaun on the cereal box said I can't get his lucky charms...

56.Catch and castrate leprechaun.

57.HE is real... No matter what the men in white coats say.

58.Staple paper in the middle of the page.

59.In case of blank looks, laugh maniacally.

60.You are not haxxor l337 or an uberhacker or anything like that.

61.Pretend to be so around teh n00bs.

62.Do not go out with voice #7. He is a sadistic, soul sucking demon.

63.Disregard last note. Go out with demon. Who needs a soul anyway?

64.Ask Senior Diablo for a bigger pitchfork.

65.Remember to kill HIM...

66.Tell the small children in Toys 'R' Us that the dolls have an insatiable thirst for blood.

67.Note reactions. Avoid parents.

68.The blood of infants gives unholy superpowers according to Jhonen C. Vasquez. Test theory.

69.Scream, the doctors don't like it, they'll give you a shot of something nice.

70.Hide the bodies, otherwise peole ask embarressing questions.

71.Eat the evidence.

72.But not if it's broken glass.

73.When in the presence of someone much wiser than you, point in a random direction and yell, "Look, a distraction!" Then run.

74.Do not tell children that Santa is fat because he eats kids.

75.Disregard last note.

76.Note reactions.

77.On average, 100 people choke to death on ball point pens every year.

78.Stock up on ball point pens.

79.Learn to fly. Tell no one.

80.The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing.

81.Do not stick fingers into blender.

82.Blender... Bad... Ouch.

83.Blood loss is bad.

84.Find way to re-attatch fingers.

85.Scream as much as humanly possible at 2AM.

86.Answer every question with a question.

87.Ask people what gender they are.

88.Note reactions.

89.Refer to people as "mortal".

90.The Seagull From Hell is out to get me.

91.Kill all enemies in most disturbing way possible.

92.Start by drowning them in fire ants.

93.Find the creators of pop-up messages.

94.Kill them.


96.Teachers don't like finding notes on world domination.

97.Dunk head in boiling water.

98.Disregard last note. Was written by Voice #7.

99.Gullible IS written on the ceiling!

100.Investigate this whole "critical mass" thing when the klaxon dies down...

101.Find out who invented "Barny"

102.Kill them

103.Burn school down

104.Along with the annoying kids in it.

105. Befriend the demonic talking fruit from hell

106. Fruit is called Annoying orange

107. kill justin bieber

108. tell no one

:DD If you repost, Then you have to add another one!! :DD

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Great Big Blue Sky of Love by SakuraSamuraiGirl reviews
Tsunami Sawada has a heart as big as the sky. There is room for one, two, three...four, five...six! The growth of the guardians love for their sky and how the sky is able to hold it all. Reverse harem and genderbender. femTsunaxAll.
Katekyo Hitman Reborn! - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 277,585 - Reviews: 835 - Favs: 1,346 - Follows: 878 - Updated: 5/24/2014 - Published: 4/29/2010 - Tsuna/Tsunayoshi S. - Complete
Tousan? by sadistic-neko reviews
Kanda is sent on a mission only to find a little girl is the exorcist that the innocence that he was sent to find is compatible with it. Once he returns he is assigned as her guardian by Kaomui along with Allen. Will this be too much for them? Yullen
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 45,731 - Reviews: 254 - Favs: 256 - Follows: 297 - Updated: 9/23/2013 - Published: 3/25/2010 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker
Take Me In by SethHayes reviews
Ciel is taken out of prostitution and forced to sell his soul to Sebastian as a servant. Sebastian, however, has no intention of treating Ciel as a servant, but more like his 'Sex-toy' and 'Play-Thing'. SEBACIEL
Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 14,450 - Reviews: 208 - Favs: 265 - Follows: 315 - Updated: 8/7/2011 - Published: 6/29/2010 - Ciel P., Sebastian M.
Tobi Induced Hilarity by lifesbutawalkingshadow reviews
Pein decides Akatsuki needs a shakeup and switches the Akatsuki teams around a little. Violence! Sarcasm! Overpowered Fangirls! More Violence! Rainbow Lollipops! All that, and more, found just inside. Turns into a story! Non-yaoi
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 16,615 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 8/5/2011 - Published: 8/31/2010 - Akatsuki, Naruto U.
Highschool Days by Zombie-chan94 reviews
Highschool-fic. Fran is new in school and the first day he hears about a certain senior-student who's the schools worst bullier. Rated M for later chaps. Lemon later.
Katekyo Hitman Reborn! - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 8,347 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 4/19/2011 - Published: 7/6/2010 - Belphegor, Fran
What Friends Are For by scorpionsatellite reviews
Some Sollux x Karkat smut. Rated M!
Homestuck - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,872 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 381 - Follows: 34 - Published: 2/20/2011 - Karkat V., Sollux C. - Complete
Hidan's Christmas Carol by Adreniline-Junky reviews
Tobi just wanted Hidan to sing a simple Christmas carol. Too bad for Tobi, he didn't know want was in store for him with the carol. Rated M for the Carol, Gore in the Carol and For Hidan just being in there.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Horror/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 423 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/24/2010 - Hidan, Akatsuki - Complete
Master by MaybeTommorrow reviews
Envy was not happy with his current situation, Not happy at all. he may have been freed of her, but dealing with him? that was a whole new circle. EnvyxEd EdxEnvy yep, and yes Lemons in later chaps
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 66,588 - Reviews: 220 - Favs: 184 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 9/3/2010 - Published: 11/10/2009 - Envy, Edward E. - Complete
The blonde angel by mustang-lover51 reviews
Roy and Ed both want each other, but neither will admit it. One morning and a little bribery later is all it takes.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 22,107 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 8/18/2010 - Published: 1/24/2010 - Edward E., Roy M.
Not Made of Stone by Jacquelynn Marie reviews
When Roy first meets Ed, he's being abused. To get him away from his abuser he sends the boy on a mission.. and he ends up coming along. He might of just made the biggest mistake of his life. But then again, it could be the best decision. YOAI, rape, etc
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,411 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 7/19/2010 - Published: 7/14/2010 - Roy M., Edward E.
The 8th Homunculi by penlover reviews
Out of failure to complete tasks Father has created another homunculi. The little girl's name is Suicide. Will she help them reach their goal or will she be a failure like the others. Only time will tell.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,695 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/15/2010 - Wrath, Father
i'm a bastard by Feisty2Sin reviews
it one little song thing you hear around school
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 30 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 9/3/2008 - Wrath - Complete