jmp22895
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Joined 05-31-10, id: 2384450, Profile Updated: 06-04-12
Author has written 10 stories for Naruto, and Hetalia - Axis Powers.

Geez I'm bad at this kind of stuff. Well, I guess I could just BS about myself:

Hi, I'm 147 years old, my name is Delilah, and I own a taser made out of feathers.

See, all of that was bull crap. Oh well, not like you could tell when I tell the truth. I could be a high school student with a secret lab underneath my couch or a man with a pet wolf and a machine gun, and you people'd never know. I mean, I feel like it'd be kinda stalkerish to even try.

Well, I'll through this part out; I'm female. See, stalkers, I just narrowed down your search to about half of the population. (Wow, just throwing this out there, if you're actually reading this, then you have a lot more patiance than me. I'm not even reading what I'm writing, otherwise it'd be a lot more eloquent and a lot less of me rambling on about who the heck knows what.)

My hobbies include throwing wood into the ocean. (Sereously, what's that even supossed to mean? I'm just writing anything that pops into my head. No wonder I've received a death threat after writing my fan fic.) I live with my parents. (Ha, see, you people don't know that they're actually androids. [Dad, if you're reading this, I'm making a joke. Don't ground me.]) Also, my dream is to graduate Harvard Law school with a medical degree. See? See what I did there? What?

Seriously, anyone reading this probably should've stopped while they were ahead. All you've really learned about me is that I'm CRAAAAAZY, which you should've been able to figure out after reading the crap I wrote. That or read the first sentance. No, not the first one, more like the fourth. Yeah, that makes more sence.

Oh, and just so you know, when I don't respond to comments, it's because I'm actually a computer program the government is trying out for artaficial intelligence. (lol no if that was true I'd probably be smarter) No, it's because I just am not going to figure out how or I'll drive away any fans with my ramblings. Also my email HATES ME! Along with the rest of technology.

Let's see, what else can I say 'bout myself...

I like puppies and rainbows and happy faces! And ice cream. Sooo much ice cream. And I like anime. If you didn't figure that out. But you likely did.

I don't do drugs. Don't do drugs kids, it'll make you turn into zombies when the government poisons your crack supply.

I hate technology. Sure it helps speed things up in life but I just know it's out to get me. Seriously, this computer has crashed on me at least four times. FOUR FREAKING TIMES! And my TV broke too. And my ipod. And I'm pretty sure that lamp is watching over my shoulder.

Seriously, is anyone even gonna read this?

Favorite animes/mangas: Naruto, Hetalia, One Piece, Bleach, Pokemon (back when it didn't suck), Full Metal Alchemist

Oh, and since I'm the laziest person that I know, I'm just gonna put all my Disclaimer things right here:

I don't own Naruto, Hetalia, Bleach, Pokemon, the song Baby, Rachel, or anything else that I've made obscure references to throughout my fan fics. They all belong to their respective owners. I only own my OCs, and, of course, the stories themselves.

Well, have fun! :D

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Crack Whims by firefly reviews
Odd pairings. Whimsical humour. Somewhat disturbing scenarios. It's what you'll find here in this collection of crack drabbles.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 31,415 - Reviews: 1444 - Favs: 1,256 - Follows: 739 - Updated: 6/22/2015 - Published: 1/1/2008
And Then There Were None by Scarlet Hanson reviews
The nations are dying one by one, and the survivors cling onto not only their lives but all that they hold dear.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,737 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 7/16/2013 - Published: 5/11/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
Shades of Innocence by Henrietta R. Hippo reviews
Feliciano Vargas was just a man in the wrong place at the wrong time. Sent down for a crime he didn't commit; Italy meets and falls for a German inmate who is imprisoned for life for an unspeakable crime. An unlikely bond is formed between these two and Feliciano discovers that there's more to this heartless criminal than meets the eye. Gerita, USUK, Spamano
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 19 - Words: 107,302 - Reviews: 914 - Favs: 1,097 - Follows: 486 - Updated: 3/7/2013 - Published: 8/5/2012 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
Why Did it Have to be You? by deathbysharpie reviews
AU; SpainxRomano; Lovino's parents are tired of his horrible behavior, and hire Antonio to babysit him. But time is a cruel mistress, and in absence the heart grows fonder. These are just some of the things Antonio and Lovino will learn.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 10 - Words: 36,876 - Reviews: 470 - Favs: 612 - Follows: 369 - Updated: 8/2/2012 - Published: 6/28/2010 - S. Italy/Romano, Spain - Complete
Bottoms Up! by Sunny Day in February reviews
Follow Lovino on his weird and, well, at least quite interesting trip around Europe in order to find out some of the greatest secrets ever about himself, Europe, tomato-shaped alarm clocks and the past of his lovely, but complicated Spanish partner.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 80 - Words: 497,431 - Reviews: 3919 - Favs: 1,596 - Follows: 871 - Updated: 4/13/2012 - Published: 9/17/2010 - S. Italy/Romano, Spain - Complete
Copper Curl by Everlasting Faerie Light reviews
Germany is haunted with distant memories of a child with a copper curl. Not only does he struggle to remember his childhood, he also has to deal with his conflicted feelings for Italy. Shounen-ai/yaoi. GerIta with Germany as HRE theory plot.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 11 - Words: 30,736 - Reviews: 171 - Favs: 318 - Follows: 126 - Updated: 2/28/2012 - Published: 1/6/2012 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
When You Know You're Obsessed With Hetalia by Bakura From School reviews
You know you're obsessed with Axis Powers: Hetalia when... Written for fun. Please Read, Review, and write your own!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 8,367 - Reviews: 316 - Favs: 316 - Follows: 152 - Updated: 2/16/2012 - Published: 6/2/2010 - Complete
Blood, Sweat, and Italians by Calamitatum reviews
Spain decides to drop in on his favorite little Italian for a surprise visit, but instead stumbles upon a rather unexpected and disturbing scene. Blood, long car rides, annoying banter, midnight escapes and madness ensues. Two-shot.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 18,248 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 2/5/2012 - Published: 1/30/2012 - S. Italy/Romano, Spain - Complete
Hands Not Meant To Shed Blood by joyouswolves reviews
When little Italy finally stands up to fight for his beloved German, what will that do to his state of being? Dang it! I can't write summaries, I write stories! So just read this one already!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,991 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 10 - Published: 2/3/2012 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
It's a Girl Thing by Henrietta R. Hippo reviews
Italy makes a deal with England and has one week as a woman to win Germany's heart, but how will Germany react when Italy's week is up and he learns the truth? Can Germany learn to see past the gender of his true love? Fem Italy/Germany
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 41,925 - Reviews: 452 - Favs: 449 - Follows: 176 - Updated: 1/24/2012 - Published: 12/1/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
Confess Your Love by ekphrastic reviews
Ludwig never thought he would despise religion so much. GERITA, lemon involved. Don't like, don't read.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,685 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 189 - Follows: 18 - Published: 10/16/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
Catch Me by bowlerhatfringe reviews
Favouritism is word Lovino learned at the age of three. AU Spamano.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,209 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 328 - Follows: 37 - Published: 9/21/2011 - S. Italy/Romano, Spain - Complete
Tumble Through Time by Flashback 1701 reviews
It's the 21st century, and a nasty fall has Ludwig convinced that he's on the verge of World War II. His familiar and devestating mindset has those around him in a state of panic and threatens to ruin the reputation he's worked so hard to save.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 10,900 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 9/1/2011 - Published: 7/7/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
The Switch by uchiha93 reviews
A mishap of magic causes France and England to swtich bodies! How will they cope before England can switch them back?
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 25,617 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 101 - Updated: 8/23/2011 - Published: 5/23/2011 - France, England/Britain
Goodbye, Lovino by 94 Bottles Of Snapple reviews
Sitting on the kitchen table was a note that laid everything bare.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,904 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 8/17/2011 - Published: 8/13/2011 - S. Italy/Romano - Complete
Eine Kleine Nachtmusik by littlemsbookworm reviews
Hungary decides to go on a late night cleaning spree...what could possibly happen? AustriaXHungary fluff.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,688 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/13/2011 - Austria, Hungary - Complete
In Which Mon Cher is Overused by CookieCollabs reviews
"Mon cher " "Don't call me that, you frog!" It was the usual. France and England were at it again. But what if things went in some other direction? FrUK T for language
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,263 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 47 - Published: 7/25/2011 - France, England/Britain - Complete
Kisses, Mon Lapin! by Orpah reviews
France takes England's knife, and offers an unwelcome compromise for its return. Little!England, Young!France
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 720 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 8 - Published: 7/24/2011 - England/Britain, France - Complete
Eroberer by loveliness decays reviews
Germany is destined to be conqueror of Europe – but Italy can never be his. AU. WWII. Hints at GerIta.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 363 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/23/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
Trainings Camp by WinnyValentine reviews
Getting Italy into serious training seems to be a mission impossible. But Germany and Italy found other ways to spend their time together. In many satisfying ways. Use of human names.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 75,448 - Reviews: 211 - Favs: 326 - Follows: 184 - Updated: 7/14/2011 - Published: 12/17/2009 - Germany, N. Italy
The Night Shift by Sunni D. Lockhart reviews
Dani, an ER physician, tends to have strange nightly medical adventures with an interesting gay couple, who clearly don't know how to have NORMAL sexual relations.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,369 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 9 - Published: 7/13/2011 - Germany, N. Italy
Hide and Seek by Little Patch of Heaven reviews
England is excellent at hiding. France is excellent at knowing where he's hidden. Hints of FrUK. Oneshot. De-anon from kink meme.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,802 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 8 - Published: 7/5/2011 - England/Britain, France - Complete
Welcome to Baker Island by retiredddddddd reviews
When no one agrees to play with him, America forces the former Allied and Axis powers to reenact World War Two on a deserted island. GerIta, FrUK, USJap, RuChi. Rated T for suggested adult themes, minor language, and petty violence. Set in modern day.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 66,713 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 6/27/2011 - Published: 12/12/2010 - Germany, N. Italy
A Missing Italian and a Worried German by YamiHeart reviews
When Germany wakes up to find Italy missing and the house a mess, his first thought? Italy's been captured by the Allies! But is he right? Slight GerIta that doesn't really control the story. Oneshot.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,119 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/16/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
Upside Down And All Around by dolcespoir reviews
Italy is acting quite strange today and Germany is clueless on what to do. The other nations are shocked at Italy's sudden changes but Romano seems to know something. And what does this all have to do with the date?
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,867 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 13 - Published: 6/14/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
A Crack in the Looking Glass by Drovenich reviews
England accidentally sends Germany to a parallel world. A world ruled by Russia with a iron fist. GerIta and Russia x Italy brothers.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 28 - Words: 85,554 - Reviews: 621 - Favs: 589 - Follows: 184 - Updated: 4/3/2011 - Published: 12/22/2010 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
I Like You, I Love You by Lili and RayRay reviews
Valentine's Day special, back for White Day! The aftermath of our beloved countries' confession-fest a month ago. GerIta, SpaMano, SuFin, Fr/UK/US love triangle, PruCan. Rating kicked up to T. R&R
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,294 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 3/13/2011 - Published: 2/12/2011 - Complete
Just For Your Smile by dolcespoir reviews
Germany, Italy, and Japan are stranded on an island again when Italy, tired from playing in the ocean, suggests that they hold a drawing competition! Who will win and what are the 'special' prizes?
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,920 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/26/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
Sayuri by wilson6666666
A young girl wakes up in the hospital of konoha. She is badly injured and has lost her memory. After becoming a ninja, she struggles to find out what happen to her, who is after her, and who or what she is.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,535 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 9/9/2010 - Published: 8/5/2010
Drowsy by ClevelandtoCharolette reviews
It had been a hard mission, there was no doubting that'. Team 7 on a cold night in a cave, a small fire and bad injuries. FLUFFish. SasuxSaku and slight NaruxHina
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,913 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 275 - Follows: 33 - Published: 12/10/2007 - Sakura H., Sasuke U. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Hell to Pay reviews
Alfred is a demon, on earth to kill a guardian angel and wreck as much havoc as possible. Arthur is the angel that has to kill him first. With both of them disguised as high school students, whoever gets found out first, dies. Unless they happen to fall for each other first.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 72,812 - Reviews: 605 - Favs: 391 - Follows: 520 - Updated: 11/19/2013 - Published: 8/20/2012 - England/Britain, America
Hetalianess reviews
This is just the kind of random hetalia idiocy that pops into my head. Nothing linear. Nothing too sensical. No real topic, whatever. Note: each of these could really be oneshots unless there are roman numerals.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 27,859 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 4/24/2013 - Published: 1/25/2011
A Rose By Any Other Name reviews
Germany is going to ask Italy out this Valentine's day. Err, that was the plan anyway. Instead, he finds himself telling Italy all about his crush on some girl named 'Felicia'. And now Germany's stuck trying to figure out how to keep up the lie or risk Italy finding out his real feelings. This probably won't be too long... Happy Valentine's Day!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,703 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 24 - Published: 2/14/2013 - Germany, N. Italy
Nothing reviews
Austria wants to remarry Hungary. It seems like a great idea, right? Everyone knows that they are perfect together! ...well, with one exception... Prussia needs to do something, fast, before it's too late.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,334 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 7/16/2012 - Published: 2/19/2012 - Prussia, Hungary
A Curse and a Prayer reviews
AU: Ludwig Beilschmidt and his brother have been rebelling against the tyrannical system that has destroyed their lives. But Ludwig, one of the people's last hopes, has been captured, and the rebellion is collapsing in on itself. Now, forced to serve two strange Italian boys by a curse, he is desperate to find a way out... GerIta, among other pairings. Rating subject to change.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 18,916 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 75 - Updated: 6/30/2012 - Published: 6/3/2012 - Germany, N. Italy
Lightning reviews
Just a few little Valentines Day stories. Happy Valentines Day ! Holy Rome X Italy, Spain X Romano, France X England
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,667 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/14/2012 - N. Italy, Holy Roman Empire - Complete
Stupid, Stupid Love reviews
Romano decides he never wants to fall in love. Heck, who would love him back anyway? But Spain, hearing Romano's plight, decides to help Romano find love! ...oh wait...
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 24,090 - Reviews: 124 - Favs: 271 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 12/11/2011 - Published: 7/22/2011 - S. Italy/Romano, Spain - Complete
Oh Canada reviews
Today is Canada's birthday. And he's sure that this time everyone will remember. It'll be his best birthday ever! ...Right? Oneshot. Happy Canada Day everyone!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,025 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 9 - Published: 7/1/2011 - Canada - Complete
Chasing An Empty Dream reviews
Germany realizes he has feelings for Italy...just in time to learn that Italy is still in love with someone else. Just who the hell is this Holy Roman Empire guy anyway? Germany's determined to learn more about the kid who stole Italy's heart...
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 48,252 - Reviews: 646 - Favs: 1,133 - Follows: 313 - Updated: 6/7/2011 - Published: 4/14/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
Nocturn reviews
There's a new member of the Akatsuki. But who is she? Why is she there? And why doesn't she even remember...?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 17 - Words: 24,875 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 2/8/2011 - Published: 8/25/2010 - Itachi U., Akatsuki