Author has written 3 stories for Glee, Bully, and Legend of Zelda.
This is the first review I've ever received. It was a particularly crippling one:
I don't usually read stories with an OC in them but for some reason yours drew me in. And I have to say that I was dissapointed. Your writing and grammer is relatively fine, it's the fact that the OC, Katie, is well...You. People oftern don't like to read about some strangers fantasy about themselves. It's a little disturbing to think you actually want to this to happen in reality. When, in fact, it will never happen. As Glee is fictional.
It seems to me that you are turning Kurt straight (I could be wrong, but that is what it seems). You realise he is, in fcat gay, right? He's not going to get all hung up on a new chick who has joined Glee. And you might want to tone the OC down a little. You've suggested that only her talent is appreciated. So she has a great voice, big deal. So do the mebmbers of Glee club any way. Why you have her beat a JOCK in a fight is beyond me. Plus, you've made the story just about her. Yes I appriciate that there is usually a main character in a story, but using your OC is a mistake. You're not going to get many reviews. Alot of criticism and maybe some flames.
This isn't a flame by the way. Because, I am in fcat, intrigued a little. Just dissapointed about the Mary-Sue. And that you are destroying the characters of Glee.
Kurt is an ice-queen(king), to be honset, you should have made a gradual flow with the friendshaip between the OC and Kurt. I mean, you NEVER become BFFS with a new girl you haven't even spoken to. And it's her first day on top of that. It's not realistic. I've read one other where Finn was falling in love with a new girl and it was unrealistic. It ruins a story that has so much potential. Your story also has lots of potential
"Well, if you must know, I hate singing in front of a few people because you can never tell what's going through their mind. If they like you or not. The pressure is unbearable. But, with a huge crowd, you know someone out there, maybe even a few hundred people, are going to love you no matter how bad you are." - So? Why would this affect the Glee members so much? Why would Kurt be happy that this new girl hurt Rachel's feelings, you made him out to be a douche. Yes he is stotic but him and Rachel are team members. Why would Rachel be crestfallen by that quote anyway? You need to elabarate a little.
If your going to continue writting, because I'll carry on reading if you do, keep the charcters in-character. That means a gay Kurt. ;)Good luck.
This is my response to it two years later:
It's been awhile since I wrote to you or even looked at this story's reviews, but I felt the need to look at this one. This is because I never got to address to you some of the points I wanted to make to this particular review you made. Now, I know I may come across as angry and I am a little, but nothing that would make me say that this review was completely unnecessary, just a little hypocritical and unfair at some points.
The first thing I would like to point out is how you started off the second paragraph. "I don't usually read stories with an OC in them but for some reason yours (You mean your's, right?) drew me in. And I have to say that I was dissapointed. (I assume you mean disappointed.)" Why did my story draw you in? Secondly, I read your profile bio before you changed it to just " Hi :)" right after I received this review two years ago and there had been a long paragraph on all the things you didn't like in Fan-fiction stories. The thing that struck me funny was that everything in that paragraph had aspects of my story in it. I don't know if my summary was the thing that drew you in or something else, but I could assume that you were looking into this story just to write a somewhat harsh review. Also, thank you for complimenting me on my writing and grammar skills. Thirdly, I would like to point out that Katie is an OC. I don't know how long you've been on this site for, but OC stories are usually more popular and more frequently written. I'd also like to say that I don't appreciate you assuming that I would like this to happen in reality. That is putting words into my mouth. I don't want that to happen because like you said, it's disturbing. Katie is like me, yes, because I purposely put aspects of myself and my life into my character like all other great authors do.
"It seems to me that you are turning Kurt straight (I could be wrong, but that is what it seems). You realise he is, in fcat (Fact. You must be typing too fast. Also the sentence should be: You realize he is, in fact, gay, right?) gay, right?" Well, I won't lie, that was my initial intention. When I had first written this story, I had caught a glimpse of the preview for Season 1 Episode 18 of Glee called Laryngitis. In this preview it showed Kurt making out with Britney. I assumed he must have been bisexual since the preview didn't give much detail of the actual plot surrounding that episode and, like I explained to you two years ago, I hadn't seen a single Glee episode before. Also, I never gave Kurt the air that he was "all hung up" on Katie, although usually people are intrigued by the new person in school, especially someone from a different state. "And you might want to tone the OC down a little." What are you talking about? Compared to most OCs on this site, I'd say Katie was a somewhat mild to rare offender of outrageous OCness. "So she has a great voice, big deal. So do the other mebmbers (Members.) of Glee club any way. (Anyway is spelt without a space between any and way.)" You're absolutely right. The Glee club members do have great voices and that's why it's a big deal, people and the fans love them for it. So, why shouldn't Katie be appreciated for it, especially since she's willing to join Glee club in the first place and risk social suicide? "Why you have her beat a JOCK in a fight is beyond me." You're right. I did take that a little too far. It's unrealistic for a small girl to be going up against a big jock, but then again, Glee is an unrealistic show. "Plus, you've made the story just about her. Yes I appriciate that there is usually a main character in a story, but using your OC is a mistake." What? No, seriously, what? What are you talking about? My OC is the main character. Usually in a story, or at least in the stories that I've read, the story is USUALLY ABOUT THE MAIN CHARACTER. Plus, I had only written three chapters and hadn't addressed any of the other characters reactions and impressions of Katie. Also, read the summary. Where did I ever indicate that this story was going to be about anything other than Kurt and Katie? It certainly didn't say that it was going to be about Mr. Schue and a broom. As for not getting a lot (Or as you say, alot, which is grammatically incorrect.) of reviews or them mostly being flames, out of the thirteen reviews this story has, excluding your's, all of them have been of praise and them begging me to continue this story.
Of course this isn't a flame, because a flame certainly wouldn't have phrases like "Mary-sue" or "destroying the characters of Glee" in it. (I'm also the King of Mexico...) But, let's address those anyways. After you told my that Katie was Mary-Sue, I looked it up because I had no idea what that was. And I would proudly like to say that Katie isn't a Mary-Sue. I never said that she was incredibly beautiful beyond compare, none of the characters have instantly fallen in love with her, she doesn't have a troubling past, nor a single scar on her body due to that troubling past. I'll say it again: She's not Mary-Sue. As for destroying the characters of Glee, what are you talking about? I have barely talked about any of them, excluding Kurt and Mercedes, and I think I captured their characters perfectly. I'd also like to point out that it disappointed you that I was making Kurt straight, when in a Yu-gi-oh story you wrote, you changed a character's gender, and therefore their sexuality, just to fit the needs of your story. This fact, alone, makes you incredibly hypocritical.
"Kurt is an ice-queen(king), to be honset, you should have made a gradual flow with the friendshaip (Friendship.) between the OC and Kurt. I mean, you NEVER become BFFS with a new girl you haven't even spoken to. And it's her first day on top of that. It's not realistic." An ice-queen? When in the show does Kurt or any of the other characters come out an say that. Kurt is only hostile and stoic to those who are mean to him or the ones he looks down on. He doesn't look down on her and she's nice to him on her first day, which brings me to my next point. I don't know how you were towards new kids in your school, but I got excited when I saw someone new, because it could get so boring with the same people, and I feel Kurt feels the same way. I think they started a friendship much quicker because Katie was initially nice to him from the beginning, stood up for him against a Jock, and they had similar interests. I'd also like to point out, again, that Glee is unrealistic. I swear, I think Glee is just another unrealistic portrayal of high school that Hollywood spit up and slapped in some popular pop and show tune covers. "I've read one other where Finn was falling in love with a new girl and it was unrealistic. It ruins a story that has so much potential. Your story also has lots of potential(.)" If you are seriously coming onto http://www.Fanfiction.net or any other fan-fiction site and expecting a masterpiece, you are going to be disappointed. Although, thank you for the compliment.
"'Well, if you must know, I hate singing in front of a few people because you can never tell what's going through their mind. If they like you or not. The pressure is unbearable. But, with a huge crowd, you know someone out there, maybe even a few hundred people, are going to love you no matter how bad you are.' - So? Why would this affect the Glee members so much?" From this, I can tell you aren't a performer. It's a common norm for it to be easy to sing in front of a group of friends or two people for an audition, but singing in front of a crowd of hundreds is intimidating and scary. By Katie saying that she prefers it is different to hear and definitely different from what they feel. That's why they reacted so strongly to it. I will continue this in a different message.
"Why would Kurt be happy that this new girl hurt Rachel's feelings, you made him out to be a douche. Yes(,) he is stotic(,) but him and Rachel are team members. Why would Rachel be crestfallen by that quote anyway? You need to elabarate (Elaborate.) a little." Okay. It's a known fact that throughout the first season of Glee that Kurt and Rachel were rivals and didn't like each other as much, which, of course, was all patched up in Season 2. I never made Kurt out to be a douche, because he was mad at Rachel in the first place for being on Katie's case. This was inspired by Season 2 when Rachel was hostile towards Sunshine. She thought Katie, like Sunshine, was a threat to her spotlight. Also, Rachel is a nosy and uptight b!tch anyways. Katie showed her up and that's why Rachel was upset. She made herself out to look like a b!tch.
I think that pretty much covers everything on how I feel about this review. Don't take this too personally, but this was the first review I ever received and it was a particularly crippling one. I needed to address this because everything you said wasn't entirely fair. I hope there won't be any bad feelings towards us. Have a nice day.
Love & UFOs,
Unsafe External Link