Author has written 1 story for Vampire Academy.
wicked (by Nancy Holder)
the darkest powers series
the tomorrow series
The Sword of truth
Harry potter (the later books)
The Prophecy of the Sisters
Damon/Elena- Vampire Diaries (Stephen is so boring)
Keenan/Aislin- wicked Lovely
Elie/Homer- Tommorow Series
Lia/James- Prophecy of the sisters
James/Lily- Harry Potter
Will/Francesca- Saving Francesca
George/Carrie- Carrie Diaries
(will and Francesca)
he Asks me my name for the fort time this week. he knows i know he knows it, but he insists on this charade.
"katarina Esparante." I tell him.
(Fancesca and Luca)
Francesca- your not to talk to that guy
Luca- he takes care of the year five, Katarina
Francesca- what does that mke him? God?
(Farancesca and Her dad)
"Oh My God!" I hold up the Ice Magic.
"where did this come from? Luca is going to sneak out of bed in the middle of the night and squirt it on his tounge. Its like drugs for ten year olds. Today its Ice Magic. Tomorrow its heroin.
"Oh God," She moans "everyone thinks I'm an idiot."
Lissa and I had been best friends ever since kindergarten, when our teacher had paired us together for writing lessons. Forcing five-year-olds to spell Vasilisa Dragomir and Rosemarie Hathaway was beyond cruel, and we’d—or rather, I’d—responded appropriately. I’d chucked my book at our teacher and called her a fascist bastard. I hadn’t known what those words meant, but I’d known how to hit a moving target.
(Rose, Kirova, Lisa and Dimitri)
-"Wild and disrespectful?" I interrupted. "Who the hell are you anyway? Outsourced help?
"Guardian Belikov is the princess’s guardian now," said Kirova. "Her sanctioned guardian."
"You got cheap foreign labor to protect Lissa?"
(Rose, Mason, Eddie and other novices)
-"Hey Mason, wipe the drool off your face. If you’re going to think about me naked, do it on your own time." ...
"This is my time, Hathaway. I’m leading today’s session
"Oh yeah?" I retorted. "Huh. Well, I guess this is a good time to think about me naked, then."
"It’s always a good a time to think about you naked," added someone nearby, breaking the tension further. Eddie Castile. Another friend of mine.
-Yeah. True. They didn’t want to deal with it tonight. You could start telling people if you wanted to. We could make a banner."
With as many times as Mia had called me a slut and a whore? Not a bad idea. "You got any markers and paper?…"
(Rose and Mia)
-I crossed my arms across my chest. "Are you lost, little girl? The elementary school’s over on west campus."
-"And if you mess with either of us again, I’ll break you in half. If you don’t believe me, go ask Dawn Yarrow about what I did to her arm in ninth grade. You were probably at nap time when it happened."
The incident with Dawn hadn’t been one of my finer moments. I honestly hadn’t expected to break any bones when I shoved her into a tree. Still, the incident had given me a dangerous reputation, in addition to my smartass one. The story had gained legendary status, and I liked to imagine that it was still being told around campfires late at night. Judging from the look on this girl’s face, it was.
-"Go find your pacifier and shut the hell up,"
"—you and your slutty friend! I’m going to tell everyone what a psycho you are and how they had to lock you in the clinic because you’re so crazy. They’re putting you on medication. That’s why you and Rose left before anyone else could find out you cut—"
"Hey," I said. "Slutty friend here. Remember what I said about standing too close to her?"
(Jesse and Rose)
-Can't I'm with my Russian Jailer"
"Can’t you ever get off for good behavior?" he joked.
I gave him what I hoped was a seductive smile as I found my seat. "Sure," I called over my shoulder. "If I was ever good."
-Jesse swallowed, eyes wide. None of the bravado he usually showed was there. I guess there was "usually" and then there was being held in the grip of a really ripped, really tall, and really pissed-off Russian guy "Yes, sir!"
(Rose and Dimitri)
-"Whoa, Dimitri," I said, tossing my bag on the floor. "I realize this is actually a current hit in Eastern Europe right now, but do you think we could maybe listen to something that wasn’t recorded before I was born?"
- get in that kind of situation all the time, Comrade. It’s not a big deal." Anger replaced my fear. I didn’t like being treated like a child.
"Stop calling me that. You don’t know even know what you’re talking about."
"Sure I do. I had to do a report on Russia and the R.S.S.R. last year."
"It's U.S.S.R ..."
-Now get back to your room—if you can manage it without throwing yourself at someone else."
"Is that your subtle way of calling me a slut?"
"I hear the stories you guys tell. I’ve heard stories about you."
-When I saw you fall..."
"You thought, ‘Wow, she’s a loser.’"
"Thats not what I thought"
-And then, suddenly, he was there, charging down the hallway like Death in a cowboy duster.
(Rose in Class)
-"My, my," he said, looking the note over. "If only students would write this much in their essays. One of you has considerably worse writing than the other, so forgive me if I get anything wrong here." He cleared his throat. "‘So, I saw J last night,’ begins the person with bad handwriting, to which the response is, ‘What happened,’ followed by no fewer than five question marks. Understandable, since sometimes one—let alone four—just won’t get the point across, eh?" The class laughed, and I noticed Mia throwing me a particularly mean smile. "The first speaker responds: ‘What do you think happened? We hooked up in one of the empty lounges.’"
Mr. Nagy glanced up after hearing some more giggles in the room. His British accent only added to the hilarity.
"May I assume by this reaction that the use of ‘hook up’ pertains to the more recent, shall we say, carnal application of the term than the tamer one I grew up with?"
More snickers ensued. Straightening up, I said boldly, "Yes, sir, Mr. Nagy. That would be correct, sir." A number of people in the class laughed outright.
"Thank you for that confirmation, Miss Hathaway. Now, where was I? Ah yes, the other speaker then asks, ‘How was it?’ The response is, ‘Good,’ punctuated with a smiley face to confirm said adjective. Well. I suppose kudos are in order for the mysterious J, hmmm? ‘So, like, how far did you guys go?’ Uh, ladies," said Mr. Nagy, "I do hope this doesn’t surpass a PG rating. ‘Not very. We got caught.’ And again, we are shown the severity of the situation, this time through the use of a not-smiling face. ‘What happened?’ ‘Dimitri showed up. He threw Jesse out and then bitched me out.’"
The class lost it, both from hearing Mr. Nagy say "bitched" and from finally getting some participants named.
"Why, Mr. Zeklos, are you the aforementioned J? The one who earned a smiley face from the sloppy writer?" Jesse’s face turned beet red, but he didn’t look entirely displeased at having his exploits made known in front of his friends. He’d kept what had happened a secret thus far— including the blood talk—because I suspected Dimitri had scared the hell out of him. "Well, while I applaud a good misadventure as much as the next teacher whose time is utterly wasted, do remind your ‘friends’ in the future that my class is not a chat room." He tossed the paper back on to Lissa’s desk. "Miss Hathaway, it seems there’s no feasible way to punish you, since you’re already maxed out on penalties around here. Ergo, you, Miss Dragomir, will serve two detentions instead of one on behalf of your friend. Stay here when the bell rings, please."
( Rose and Lisa)
-Lissa knelt down, compassion on her face. I wasn’t surprised, since she’d always had a thing for animals. She’d lectured me for days after I’d instigated the infamous hamster-and-hermit-crab fight. I’d viewed the fight as a testing of worthy opponents. She’d seen it as animal cruelty.
-"Hey, I don’t see you buying slutty tops."
"Im not the one who wears them"
"Thanks a lot"
"You know what I mean"
(Rose and Christian)
-"I'm gonna kill you." ...
"Why? Is it like guardian extra credit?"
Vampire Diaries (TV) Quotes
Damon: I'm Damon, Stefan's brother.
Damon: Great gal. She's got spunk. You, on the other hand, look pooped
Caroline: Cocky much?
Stefan: It's time for you to go.
Damon [on Stefan's journal: Very Emerson, the way you reveal your soul. So many... adjectives
Damon: It's cool not growing old. I like being the eternal stud.
Damon: What's so special about this Bella girl? Edward's so whipped!
Caroline: They look so cute together.
Zach: You don't visit, Damon... You appear. Periodically. Reminding me that this isn't my house, that you're only allowing me to live here ... allowing me to live.
Damon: Is it skunk? Saint Bernard? Bambi?
Damon: I say snatch, eat, erase!
Elena: If you wanted me dead, I'd be dead.
Vicki: Why do I need to pee? I thought I was dead.
Vicki: You did this to me out of boredom?
Damon: Come on Vicki. Live a little. No pun intended.
Elena: You did this. This is your fault.
Damon: Why are you so mean to me?
Damon: Does it get tiring, being so righteous?
Lexi: The famous Elena?
Damon [on coffee: It does dead flesh good
Damon: If I had a good side, not a way to get on it.
Damon [to Alaric: Guess what? Everyone hates me. But you can't deny: we were bad ass!
Damon: I haven't hunted a human in... God, way too long.
Damon: Turn it up a little bit. It's not annoying yet
Elena: How long until he's back to normal.
Stefan: I really liked you better when you hated everybody.
Damon: We're a team. We could travel the world together. We could try out for The Amazing Race!
Damon: I was ambushed. I was shot. Now, I'm vengeful.
Mayor Stratton: Do I look like a student?
Damon: I don't side with anyone. You piss me off. I want you dead
Elena: This is kidnapping.
Elena: I saved your life.
Damon: You're not the worst company in the world, Elena.
Damon: You okay?
Damon: It's not like we all hang out together at the vamp bar and grill
Stefan: I'm talking about Atlanta.
Alaric: First person account of the Civil War? That's like porn for a history teacher.
Bonnie: You tried to kill me.
Stefan: He posed as a pizza delivery boy last night.
Damon: If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it. (ILOVE THAT LINE)
Stefan: Anna took Elena.
Damon: How long are you gonna blame me for turning your birth mother into a vampire?
Elena: Damon gets what he wants, no matter who he hurts in the process.
Elena: What do they want with him?
Damon: I have two liters of soccer mom in the fridge.
Damon: Am I leaving anything out?
Damon: I get it. He's the reason you live. His love lifts you up where you belong
Damon: Have I entered an alternate universe where Stefan is fun
Damon: We have a problem, Stefan. And when I say problem, I mean global crisis
Damon: You seem awfully chipper lately. Less doom and gloom. More pep in your step
Damon: Why don't you just walk up to Sheriff Forbes? Ask her to tap a vein?
Damon: You spent the last century and a half being the poster child for Prozac. Now you want me to believe this new you has nothing to do with human blood.
Damon: John, whatever I can do to help make this town safe. Even if it means spending time with you.
Damon: I'll sever your hand, pull your ring off and kill you. Do you understand that?
Damon: Nostalgia is a bitch.
Damon: Today has been a no-good, very-bad day
Damon: I couldn't have him running around chewing on people with the town running around looking for vampires, could I?
Damon: Stefan likes puppy blood... little Golden Retriever blood with floppy ears. That's his favorite.
Damon: How'd you get this number?
Alaric: Can we not kill anyone tonight, please?
Damon: Let's not kill anyone tonight. Your words. Just pointing that out.
Damon: What did you think you were gonna find? Isobel with a cigar and slippers?
Damon: You brood too much... My actions, they belong to me. I own them.
John: What do you think your mother would say if she knew you were dating a vampire?
Damon: You successfully cured him of anything interesting about his personality.
Alaric: She threatened to go on a killing spree.
Damon: Stefan is different. He wants to be human. He wants to feel every episode of How I Met Your Mother
Damon: I do believe in killing the messenger. Know why? It sends a message. (again I LOVE THIS LINE)
Damon: I like being a living dead person.
Stefan: What proof do you have?
Elena : I think you should stop with the flirty little comments and the eye thing you do.
Damon: It's Founder's Day. I'm here to eat cotton candy and steal your girl
Damon: You have no sense of humor.
Favorite Quotes by Harry Potter
"I don't go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me."
"Are you insane? Of course I want to leave the Dursleys! Have you got a house? When can I move in?"
"He was my mum and dad's best friend. He's a convicted murderer, but he's broken out of wizard prison and he's on the run. He likes to keep in touch with me, though...keep up with news...check if I'm happy..."
"Brilliant! It's Potions last thing on Friday! Snape won't have the time to poison us all!"
"Harry, don't go picking a row with Malfoy, don't forget, he's a prefect now, he could make life difficult for you..."
"Why were you lurking under our window?"
"You know your mother, Malfoy? The expression on her face - like she's got dung under her nose? Is she like that all the time or just because you were with her?"
"Warrington's aim's so pathetic I'd be more worried if he was aiming for the guy next to me"
“Can you believe our luck?” said Ron miserably, bending down to pick up Scabbers. “Of all the trees we could’ve hit, he had to get one that hits back.”
“Oh get out of the way, Percy,” said Fred. “Harry’s in a hurry.” “Yeah, he’s off to the Chamber of Secrets for a cup of tea with his fanged servant,” said George, chortling.
Copy And Paste
-if you have read every vampire book you can get your little hands on, copy and paste this
If you walk and trip or stumble because your too busy reading a book copy and paste this into your profile.
If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your pro!
Weird is good. Strange is bad. Odd is what you call someone who you can't decide what to call them. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which means weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile.
If you ever wondered who made up all of the 'copy this into your profile' things then copy this into your profile
If you have ever tripped when there was a WATCH YOUR STEP sign, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile
If you've ever tripped over your own toe, copy this to your profile.
If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this to your profile.
If you've ever had an argument with yourself, copy this to your profile.
If you've ever had a conversation with yourself, copy this to your profile.
If you've ever lost a bet to yourself, copy this to your profile.
Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"
If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.
if they are right... copy and paste this into your profile.
Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!
If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc, and the people who kill the animals don't use the meat, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever walked into a door that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile
-If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tried to open a door when it's locked copy and paste this into your profile.
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up.
He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism
I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday.
IF YOU BELIEVE THAT HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG (and you cried while reading this) REPOST THIS!!
A SAD Story:
I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back.
The boy couldn't have been more than five or six years old. The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."
Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''
The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''
Then she asked him to stay there for just five minutes while she went to look around. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.
"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."
I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.
But he replied to me sadly, "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there."
His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''
My heart nearly stopped.
The little boy looked up at me and said, "I told Daddy to tell Mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from Target."
Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me, "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me."
"I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."
Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy, "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''
"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money.
The little boy said, "Thank you God for giving me enough money!"
Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that Mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!''
"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose. My mommy loves white roses."
A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.
Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.
The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma.
Was this the family of the little boy?
Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away.
I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.
She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.
I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine.
And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.
Now you have 2 choices:
1) Repost this message, or
2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart
25 REASONS I OWE MY MOTHER
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
19. My mother taught me ESP.
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
Ten Resons Why Bella's an Idiot
1. She jumped off a cliff and didn't die. (which is a Shame)
2. She didn't kill Jacob for imprinting on Nessie.
3. What regular person uses the word irrevocably?
4. She can't win an argument with Edward unless its about sex.
5. She's a freaking spaz. (Yep)
6. she's in love with edward ewwwwwwwwwww!!!
7. she tortures Jacob and then says "i Don't want to hurt him anymore" and the hurts him some more.
8. she chose Forks over fircking Florida!! (Who does that! Doesn't she have a brain?)
9. she says Eward want to suck her blood and that she loves him in the same paragraph!
10. she's just ergggh!!
Repost if you agree to at least three statements.
favourite Random quotes:
I blame disney for my high expections of men"
"Be the kind of women that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the devil says :Oh shit she's up"
"Some people are alive ONLY because it's illgel to kill them"
" I don't suffer from insanity...I enjoy every minute of it"
" Every girl needs a man that won't break her heart and a pair of friends that will kick her ass if he does"
" Call me what you want , I don't care. Insult my friends lets take a walk and I'll give you a hint your going to need an ambulence."
" Never go to bed angry...Stay up and plot your revenge"
"I'm the author of my own life but unfortunalty I'm writing in pen and can't erase my mistakes"
"Yeah keep fucking with me just know that if I plead insanity there will be NO questions asked"
" Why ask permission when you can beg for forgiveness later?"
People are like SLINKIES. Basically useless. And yet it's so amusing to watch them fall down the stairs.
Smile... it makes people wonder what you're up to.
It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt... then it's hilarious.
I don't know what your problem is but I bet it's hard to pronounce.
I know Karate, Kung Fu, and 47 other dangerous words.
Come to the dark side. We have cookies. ( I LOVE THIS QUOTE!!)
At last! My plans for world domination are complete! MUAHAHAHAA? Oh look, something shiny!:P
-If you're gonna be two-faced, sweetie at least make one of them pretty.
-All work and no play means you will die in seven days... dun dun duuun
-I run with scissors; it makes me feel dangerous
-Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
-they say "guns dont kill people, people kill people.' Well, i think the gun helps, cuz if you just stood ther and yelled BANG I dont think you'd kill too many people.
-so, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil?
save the earth. it's the only planet with chocolate.
- I've heard that its possible to grow up. I've just never met anyone who's actually done it. (Besides, whats the fun in that?)
- No I won't go to hell! it has a restraining order against me
- You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me
-when Life gives you lemons, throw them back, because I mean really? who likes lemons?
-when Life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.
-when Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then.
I'm not so good with the advice. can i interest you in a sarcastic comment?
-i called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse
- love your enemies. it pisses them off
- oops! did my sarcasm hurt your feelings?
- i used to have an open mind, but my brains kept falling out
-I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind! but not my brain. I need that.
-life isnt passing me by; it's trying to run me over
- i talk to myself because my answers are the only ones i accept!
- therapy is expensive. popping bubble wrap is cheap... you decide
-i used to see a shrink... until she said life isnt for everyone
- excuse me, have you seen my sanity? I think I lost it
-if asteroids are in the hemisphere, and hemroids are on your ass, why are they named the way they are?
-if olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
-i live in my own little world. but it's ok, they know me there
-money can't buy happiness. it just buys everything you need to acheive it.
-three wise women would have stopped to ask for directions, got to the stable on time, helped deliver the baby, cleaned the stable, cooked the dinner, and there would have been peace on earth
-the dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide
-your weirdness is creeping out my imaginary friend
-tell the truth and run
-if electricity comes from electrons, where do you think morality comes from? (Hehe MORONS! For those of you who didn't figure it out)
-Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking creatures?
-if everything seems to be going well, you've obviously overlooked something
-you cry, i cry. you laugh, i laugh. you jump off a cliff, i laugh even harder
-a good friend will always bail you out of jail. a best friend is sitting ther next to you saying 'man that was fun!'
-everything in this room is eatable, even I'm eatable. But that is called 'cannibalism' my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies.
-education is important. school however, is another matter.
-i used to be normal... until i met those freaks i call my friends
- do people even know what 'pro-biotic' and 'omega 3 fatty acids' are? cuz the yogurt may taste good, but it sounds pretty gross to me
-it's not just your family. It's the whole idea of... you know. they're always telling you what to do and what not to do, and its not conductive to a creative atmosphere!
-all right, all right. you have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timings right... and thats what deathbeds are for
- the man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on
- I got you a present; it's a CD. I hope you haven't got it, because I don't have a receipt... and I didn't exactly buy it
-The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese ( wrong in so many ways.)
-When in doubt, make up words!
-Ask no questions and I will tell no lies.
-Never mind, it's complex.(person 1)
The way your mind works gives a new meaning to the word complex... and not in a good way.( person 2)
-Shoot for the moon, if you miss you'll land among the stars... Umm hello the stars are after the moon. geez...
-Home is not where you live, but where they understand you.
-Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk, the rest of our lives they tell us to just sit down and shut up
-If at first you don't succeed, Then skydiving isn't for you!
-You say I'm not cool. Cool is just another word for cold. If I'm not Cold then I'm Hot. I know I'm Hot. Thank You for embracing it!
-I'm not insensitive, I just dont care
-If two wrongs don't make a right, try three
-Before you critisize someone walk a mile in their shoes, that way you'll be a mile away and have their shoes!
-the statistics of insanty is that 1 of every 4 people have a mental illness. Look at your three best friends, if they're ok, then it's you!
-When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.
A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work.
-Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
-When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them.
-Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!
-The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.
-Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe.
-Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.
-What happens if you get scared half to death twice? That's a really good question...i wonder...
"Forget love..I'd rather fall in chocolate!"
"Yes, I'm weird. No, I don't care."
"Silence is golden and duct tape is silver."
"Girls are better than boys because we're girls. Without us, boys wouldn't be here."
"Girls rule, boys suck. The. End."
"Yes, I ask stupid questions. Yes, I do it on purpose."
"Our opinion is not ridiculous or little. It is smart alecky and important."
"Do you make an effort to be an idiot..or is it a gift?"
-The key to getting your mother to shut up!! IT'S BEEN SOLVED!! Here it is:
Roses are red,
If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
"You can't always argue with all of the fools in the world. It's easier to let them have their way, then trick them when they aren't paying attention." -Brom, Eragon
-I had a friend once, but then the rope broke and he got away.
A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will prank call him and whisper, " You will die in seven days..."
A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much?"
A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.
A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run - bitch - run!"
A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.
A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"
-Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
-There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM...
-Music is like candy-you throw away the rappers.
SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST STUPID... WANT PROOF SCROLL DOWN
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