matt9713
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Joined 07-19-10, id: 2455094, Profile Updated: 11-25-10
Author has written 2 stories for South Park.

ello i love south park and death note i like girlz and im 13 and im a girl and i wish i had a webcam cuz i wanna be on chats with mah budies i dont mind bein in a long distanc relashionships o and if any1 wants 2 be my kyle ill be happyz

SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil (So I’ve been told)
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak. (well, I try to anyway...)
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I can't help POINTING OUT MISTAKES so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you like smiley faces, copy this into your profile. :)

If you have ever said something that is nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are wondering where this 'If you have ever' stuff came from, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like annoying people just for the hell of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you don't have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you all ready have or can't but want to spread the word, copy this onto your profile.

Paste this in your profile if you have ever seen a ghost or something supernatural.

If you have fallen asleep at your computer only to wake to see an untold number of pages of one lone letter on a word docment because your head was on the keyboard, post this to your profile

If you have ever awaken your father or mother at 3 in the morning to kill a spider in your room, post this on your profile

People of the world who HATE math UNITE! If you suck at math and think anyone who likes math is weird copy and paste the to your profile

If you have ever thought you could fly and jumped off your bed then copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, sakura fall, Two Tailz,keeah, MattxMellofangirl,matt9713

If you have ever stared at a computer screen for hours and hours reading stories that people who have no lives whats so ever and have enough obsession with something to write a story about it and you are one of those people, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: sakura fall, Two Tailz,keeah, MattxMellofangirl,matt9713

If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories copy and paste this to yor profile.

If you think that Sasuke from Naruto completly has to have the nick-name 'Chicken Butt Hair Dude', copy this to your profile while laughing your ass off.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile.

PUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE- if you have ever listened to music in another language, and sung along having no IDEA what they are SAYING and PROUD OF IT

If Fanfiction(or goodreads) to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile

If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you actually take the time to read other people's profiles, put this in yours.

If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, put it in your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have laughed so hard that you couldn't breath and ended up laughing silently while half crying due to lack of air copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever tried to use magic, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you believe in fantasy, copy and paste this to your profile.

Education can make the difference between Mcdonalds and being a rocket scientist. If you think education can be cool if you don't end up with a monotone teacher/professor, copy and paste this into your profile.

you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (It's kinda hard...). So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK.But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

Paste this on your profile if you also dislike racism.

No event is complete without theme music. If you have ever started humming/singing your own theme music, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are one of the proud teens/adults who have a v-o-c-a-b-u-l-a-r-y and do not limit themselves to "omg!" and "Like, that is, like, so, like, totally awsome...!". copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you think that writing fanfics is fun, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're against animal cruelty, (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, illegal dog fights, chimp slavery, etc.) copy and paste this into your profile.

If you would rather be unique than being a zombie prep/cool, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever laughed during something sad and depressing and ruined a moment, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you laugh secretly at some people or keep on comparing them with characters because they resemble some characters, copy and paste this into your profileIf you have ever turned a corner and banged your arm/leg/toe/head on the wall, put this in your profile and add your name to the list: Zilo Sugarpill, Ailia Sparrowhawk, iTorchic,Rena

If you can't stand it when people have a lot of those "copy and paste this into your profile" things in their profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

...If you got the above line, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you believe in your right to like/dislike what you like/dislike without the express approval of society or your local fangirls, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you just wasted time in your life you'll never get back by reading this profile, copy and paste this into your profile.If you have ever wished you could materialize a hammer/frying pan/giant fan out of thin air to beat someone with, put this into your profile.

A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that stories that make fun of stereotypical fanfic ideas are funny, copy this and paste it in your profile.

If you’ve used bold, italics, and underline all at once just to see what it looked like, copy this and paste it in your profile.

If you frequently use words that your spell checker says don’t exist, put this in your profile

If you hate in when other people don't use proper grammar, but can't use in yourself, copy this and paste it in your profile.

F YOU'VE EVER TYPED A WHOLE SENTENCE AND THEN LOOKED UP AND REALIZED THE CAPS LOCK WAS ON AT THE WRONG TIME, PUT THIS IN YOUR PROFILE AND ADD YOUR NAME TO THE LIST: Zilo Sugarpill (do it all the time), Ailia Sparrowhawk ( most annoying thing in the world). iTorchic ((GAH! IT HAPPENS TOO MUCH! wait, DAMN!))Rena((all the time)), MattxMellofangirl

If you have ever fallen and knocked someone over on the way down, put this in your profile and add your name to the list: EschaLee (I actually knocked over 3 people...), Zilo Sugarpill (Can you say dominoes?), Ailia Sparrowhawk ( did it in karate class actualy, I call it Self-Sacrafice-Tackle-Attack), iTorchic (so much fun XD )Rena((it was an EPIC FAIL)), MattxMellofangirl,matt9713

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, sakura fall, Two Tailz, EdElricFan1001, BakaKonekoRKL, CharmedFullMetalAvatar, E.Mahiru, Ailia Sparrowhawk, iTorchic, MattxMellofangirl

If you have ever stared at a computer screen for hours and hours reading stories that people who have no lives whatsoever and have enough obsession with something to write a story about it and you are one of those people, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: sakura fall, Two Tailz, EdElricFan1001, BakaKonekoRKL,CharmedFullMetalAvatar, E.Mahiru, Ailia Sparrowhawk, iTorchic, MattxMellofangirl

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similiar, copy this into your profile.


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Kyle's Secret Feelings by StyleFTW reviews
My 1st South Park Fic :D Kyle has been in love with his best friend, Stan for years but he's only just relized it when Stan got back together with Wendy... will Kyle's dream come true or will he be heartbroken? R&R Rated M xo
South Park - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 9,214 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 11/28/2010 - Published: 4/16/2010 - Kyle B., Stan M. - Complete
Teach me by omer-yaoi-love reviews
Kyle teaches Stan Hebrew :D rated M for reasons
South Park - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,345 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/25/2008 - Stan M., Kyle B. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Im not ok I promise reviews
Ok death style thats all you get ok
South Park - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 567 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/23/2010 - Stan M., Kyle B. - Complete
My lovely reviews
Ok my frist storie on fanfic but iv writen befor so yea sorry about speling Kyle x Kenny
South Park - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 504 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/19/2010 - Kenny M., Kyle B. - Complete