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Joined 08-13-10, id: 2494901, Profile Updated: 09-29-12

For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt!' Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.

In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.

Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.

Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.

Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.

The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.

Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.

Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt,' you can correct them.

Sincerely, Crock O. Schitt

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The Art of Subjugation by Leyvaten-Wench reviews
Sue Sylvester finds herself in need of assistance. And who better to ask for aid than one of her few relatives, that's not an obsessive Nazi hunter or a complete waste of oxygen? Here comes Harry. Non-Magic AU Warning, possible slash and violence.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Glee - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 81,566 - Reviews: 628 - Favs: 891 - Follows: 1,113 - Updated: 12/6/2013 - Published: 8/15/2012 - Harry P., Sue S., Santana L., Blaine A.
The Biggest Mistake by Cap'n BlackRose reviews
Forever is unfathomable by the human mind. Any creature that understands forever, is rarely sought out willingly. Albus Dumbledore has made many mistakes in his long life. It is now time to fix the biggest mistake he ever made. Harry/Edward
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 29,445 - Reviews: 459 - Favs: 918 - Follows: 1,591 - Updated: 11/14/2013 - Published: 6/15/2009 - Harry P., Edward
Confessions of a Male Escort by She Who Cannot Be Turned reviews
Harry left the wizarding world after defeating Voldemort for revenge against his parents real killer. He gets his revenge in unorthodox ways. Six years later, he is visited by a pair of angels, who want him to prevent Sam's fall from grace. SLASH SW/HP
Crossover - Harry Potter & Supernatural - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 193,925 - Reviews: 915 - Favs: 1,405 - Follows: 1,916 - Updated: 8/5/2013 - Published: 3/14/2010 - Harry P., OC, Sam W., Dean W.
A Goa'uld's Life by Respite88 reviews
Ripped from one life and thrown into another, watch this wizard turned Goa'uld work his way to power. AU, Manipulative!Harry, PowerHungry!Harry, Kinda!Super!Harry.
Crossover - Stargate: SG-1 & Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 82,121 - Reviews: 1451 - Favs: 1,716 - Follows: 2,004 - Updated: 7/19/2013 - Published: 6/14/2012 - Harry P.
Going Against the Storm by Col. Rage-Shadow Dragon Leader reviews
Harry has won the war at the cost of everyone he cares about. All he wants now is death to be with them; he apparates away from Wizarding Britain to a forest somewhere after begging the Fates to take him. The Fates have played with Harry Potter before, so what's stopping them from playing with him now? He apparates right into the path of vampires, and he doesn't even know it.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 12 - Words: 42,905 - Reviews: 195 - Favs: 360 - Follows: 524 - Updated: 3/29/2013 - Published: 7/12/2012 - Harry P., Emmett
Yanked from the UK by Moriarty's Minion reviews
HP/Bones Crossover. While investigating a murder in London, Booth and Brennan interrogate the victim's assistant, Harry Potter-Black. With his boss murdered, Harry decides to take a position at the Jeffersonian Institute under Brennan's guidance. SLASH.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Bones - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 102,051 - Reviews: 2604 - Favs: 3,177 - Follows: 4,353 - Updated: 12/31/2012 - Published: 8/31/2010 - Harry P.
Moving Twilight by LMG reviews
7/28/12 * * * * * - - - - PLEASE READ! THIS IS A REPOST OF ALL CHAPTERS AS I FOUND A MAJOR PROBLEM WITH THEM. SOME WERE MISSING! I ASK EVERYONE TO BE PATIENT AS I ATTEPMT TO FIX THIS. * * * * * - - - -
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 35,727 - Reviews: 458 - Favs: 567 - Follows: 997 - Updated: 7/28/2012 - Published: 2/2/2009 - Harry P., Edward
Love Begins by Nokashikiari reviews
When Harry arrived in Lima, Ohio and began William Mckinley High School the last thing he expected to find was the love of his life. Title of this story was taken from the musical Wonderland. Hurt and Pucktana.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 20,784 - Reviews: 147 - Favs: 374 - Follows: 619 - Updated: 1/20/2012 - Published: 6/21/2011 - Harry P., Puck
Everything by nikkithedead reviews
Sam is slowly trying to come out at his school, and with Kurt as a couple. As their relationship matures, and the two begin this difficult task, they realize it will be a lot harder than they thought. Sequel to "Who is Sam Evans?"
Glee - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 99,813 - Reviews: 219 - Favs: 139 - Follows: 134 - Updated: 12/21/2011 - Published: 2/8/2011 - Sam E., Kurt H. - Complete
Anonymity by AquilusNyx reviews
The war is over and Harry needs to escape. Remus decides the Boy-Who-Lived needs a chance to be a normal kid, and whisks him away to a small town in Ohio. Drama ensues. Harry/Kurt, AU after 5th Book and Duets, rated for language and violence.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Glee - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 104,776 - Reviews: 742 - Favs: 1,495 - Follows: 892 - Updated: 10/28/2011 - Published: 4/6/2011 - Harry P., Kurt H. - Complete