Author has written 1 story for Harry Potter.
A few quotes:
The death is but a door...it swings both ways.
Those that say nothings impossible never tried to slam a revolving door.
This is not something to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown, with great force!
Those who live by the sword get shot by those that don't.
Never knock on Death's door: ring the doorbell and run away! He really hates that!
Suicide is a way of telling God, "YOU CAN'T FIRE ME,I QUIT!"
If at first you don't succeed, then destroy all evidence that you tried.
That which doesn't kill you...will probably try again.
If at first you do succeed, try not to look too astonished.
Always forgive your enemies-nothing annoys them so much.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
I used to have an open mind, but my brains kept falling out.
Evening news is where they tell you 'good evening' then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
Join the army, visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
When you’re right, no one remembers, when you’re wrong, no one forgets.
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
A day without sunshine, is like, night.
According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist.
All those who believe in psycho kinesis raise my hand.
Confucius says: "Man who stands on toilet is high on pot!"
Florida: We're number one! Wait! Recount!
Gravity is a myth: the Earth sucks.
It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt. Then it's hilarious!
A good friend will come and bail you out of jail… but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying “damn…that was fun”
333 I’m only half evil
Don’t take live too seriously. It isn’t permanent
I don’t have a drinking problem: I get drunk I pass out no problem.
Yesterday is another country, Borders are now closed.
Right now I've got amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
Time is what keeps things from happening all at once.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
Don't steal. The government hates the competition.
Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an idiot.
So many people...so few comets.
Comfort the disturbed. Disturb the comfortable.
A waist is a terrible thing to mind.
Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
Sex is like pizza, when it's bad it's still kinda good.
Warning: Dates on calendar are closer than they appear.
We have enough youth, how about a fountain of "smart."
Jesus loves you! But everyone else thinks you're an asshole.
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
At a nudist wedding everyone can see who the best man is.
Very funny Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
The early bird may get the worm, but it's the second mouse that gets the cheese.
Follow your dream! (Unless it's the one where you're at work only wearing underwear during a fire drill.)
Forecast for tonight: dark.
If marriage was outlawed only outlaws would have in-laws.
Don't drink and park. Accidents cause people.
If your nose runs and your feet smell you were probably built upside down.
Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.
Last night I played a blank tape full blast. The mime next door went nuts.
Ignoring bullshit is wrong, bullshit makes the flowers grow, and that's beautiful.
If you can't baffle them with brilliance, befuddle them with bullshit.
Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
24 hours in a day... 24 beers in a case... coincidence?
If you choke a Smurf what color does it turn?
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
Someday we'll look back on all this, and plough into a parked car.
Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
If you're going to do something wrong, have fun doing it!
Cry me a river, build a bridge, and jump off it.
They condemn what they do not understand.
There are a few ways to silence the screams. Bullets happen to be one of the more efficent methods.
You have the right to remain silent, so SHUT UP!