Author has written 8 stories for Artemis Fowl, and Bleach.
WARNING! This profile is unbelievably long! It could take you forever to read it all. Feel free to scroll down to the bottom if you're only interested in seeing what I've written. I'm just one of those people who can't stop talking once I get started. (Yes, I know technically it's typing, but it's the same basic priniciple)
Hey, I'm RAHbooks (obviously since you clicked on my profile). I'm twenty-seven years old and hope to be an author, so I am doing fanfiction to see what people think of what I write as well as because it's fun. I am a girl, in case anyone's wondering.
I am a Christian Baptist, but unlike the steriotype I do think it is possibe for people in other denominations to be Christians. As long as you belive Jesus Christ is the Son of God, and accept Him as your Lord and Savior you can be saved, how you chose to worship is your own business. This might be influenced by the fact that both of my parents used to be Catholics and firmly belive that they were saved before deciding to change to Baptist because they thought it made more sense.(The sense comment is not meant to insult Catholics, I'm just saying that's what they thought) I got saved when I was six, on Christmas Eve, 1996, along with my sister who is three years older than me and married. I only ever went to Christian schools which I am glad my parents cared enough to spend money on.
I have a crazy sense of humor which you probably know if you have read any of my stories. I should also warn you that I am a fan of surprise endings. Whether this is because M. Night Shyamalan is my favorite director, or the other way around I have no idea. I also do not know whether I can actually pull off writing them, so I like reviews to tell me how I can improve. I will try to answer all reviews. If I don't it's probably because I accidentally clicked delete, which has happened. I still won't be updating much on Sunday, but it might happen with my mom's schedule making her work on Sunday's occasionally if I can't make it to church I might take advantage of the extra time to write. Also my dad is a semi truck driver so when he's home I hardly ever get a turn on the computer so if I take a while to answer messages that's probably why.
Just to let you know, while as a Christian I do not habitually use cuss words (that's not to say I don't slip, who hasn't? but I try not to) As a writer I realize that sometimes it just does not make sense for charecters not to cuss. Some charecters are just OOC if they don't cuss, and just saying "so and so swore" doesn't always cut it. Sorry, but people cuss, it happens, and if stories are going to be beleivable charecters have to cuss. Seems a little silly to make a big deal over it seeing as I probably won't use them often, and it will probably be ones, that most people don't consider a big deal anyway, but I don't want to get accused of being a hypocrite, so rather than answering reviews to that effect I thought I'd explain it here and hopefully prevent them. The same goes for pre-marital relations, I don't neccesarrily approve but people do that and it can make for some good stories/plot devices, but don't expect too many juicy details about the event itself.
Artemis Fowl series by Eoin Colfer. I am addicted to these! (Just ask my sister!) I've read all of them 4 times now and talked my sister and my mom into reading them, and they both enjoyed them as well. My favorite book in the series is The Atlantis Complex, whether because Orion was so funny or because I felt sorry for the bad guy I'm not sure. Probably both. My favorite character is Holly because she reminds me of my mom who was the only female in her Navy squadron, is claustrophobic, and has a temper (never taken out on me or my sister). Basically I think Eoin Colfer was writing about mom and didn't know it. Although when I ask my mom which character she thinks she is most like she says Opal Koboi, which makes sense. They are both chocoholics and when we take those "Which character are you?" quizzes she always chooses "rule the world" on the "would you rather?" question. Not to mention the fact that Opal turned herself into a human. Uh-oh. Finished The Last Guardian! Personally I really liked the ending, it leaves things nice and open so I don't have to worry about messing things up in my stories. It also make it really easy to combine with Bleach (anime/manga)Actually the next story I'm planning for this is a Bleach crossover, but things are explained as Artemis and Holly find out so don't worry about not understanding it.
Two Princesses of Bamarre by Gail Carson Levine. I read this one twice a year. I didn't realize I was doing that at first, it just happened. My favorite character is actually Vollys. Yes the dragon. I seem to like the villainous characters best. I think part of why I like it so much is that since I have an older sister I can really relate to Addie wanting to save Meryl. Thank God I've never actually been in a situation where that was necessary. I do mean that sincerely, not just as an expression.
Percy Jackson and the Olympians series by Rick Riorden. I have always been interested in mythology so of course these I enjoy these. I love seeing the Greek monsters, and gods in the modern world! My favorite book in the series is The Sea of Monsters, just because it's so funny. Poor Grover! Grover is my favorite character, partly because he's funny, but also because he's such a loyal friend to Percy. I liked the movie too. I saw it in theaters after I read the first book and think most of what they changed actually made it better, at least to put it in a movie; some things look fine on a page but aren't so easy to see on screen. I did wonder why they used the Hydra instead of the Chimera, but at least they had a reason to go to those places and fight the monsters instead of just randomly running into them on their way to the Underworld. I also enjoyed the second movie and I'm glad they worked Grover's wedding dress in there. The scene where they sing "It's a Small World After All" while on the abandoned roller coaster made me laugh as well.
Inkheart, Inkworld, and Inkdeath by Cornielia Caroline Funke. I don't know what the set is called. Inkdeath is probably my favorite since that's the one everything gets resolved in. I didn't like Inkworld as much, but that was mostly because of the ending, it's better with the other two. My favorite character is Dustfinger 'cuz he's just awesome! Seriously the man can control fire, how can you not love that? I really like Roxane too, I just love how she isn't even angry at him even though she had no idea where he was, that's just amazing. I could go on like this a while, there aren't many charecters in these books I don't like. Except the bad guys of course. I really think Orpheaus should have died though. Maybe I'll write a fanfic about that. I like the movie too, Brenden Fraser did an excellent job, and Andy Serkis seemed to enjoy playing Capricorn.
The Enchanted Forest Chronicles by Patricia C. Wrede. I have read these more than once, but I'm not sure how many times. Searching for Dragons is probably my favorite because it has the best ending. Talking to Dragons ended alright too, I just don't like that Mendanbar didn't get to see his son grow up. (Oops, "Spoilers, Sweetie") My favorite charecters are Morwen and Telemain, too close to call. I can actually understand Telemain without Morwen's translations and once I tried to figure out how I would explain what he said and realized that my way was just as confusing. I always have liked big words, I actually corrected my kidergarten teacher on how to say "paleantologist". (Yet I can't seem to remember how to spell it and I'm too lazy to go look it up.)
The Unicorns of Balinor by Mary Stanton. Is anyone else pissed off that these are practically impossible to find now? Scholastic majorly screwed up when they didn't allow these to get out enough for people to notice them, I don't know what they were thinking! And why isn't there at least one more about Ari finding her parents? Did I miss that one somehow, or does it actually not exist? Anyway now that that rant is over with, I can't really pick a favorite book in the seris because they go together so much. My favorite charecter is Lori Carmicheal. I know, I'm weird. It's probably because she's the normal person in the group and she's scared to death, yet she keeps going. I don't think she means to be a brat; it would be hard for anyone in her position not to be. Although I will admit to being annoyed at the way she treats Chase in book one, but one of the great things about her charecter is seeing her grow up through the series.
Pendragon:Journal of an Adventure Through Time and Space by D.J. MacHale. I'm not really sure what my favorite book in this seris is either. My favorite charecter is um...I don't know. I actually like all of them. I know we're supposed to hate Saint Dane, but he's a pretty cool villian, and let's face it without a good villian the story just isn't worth reading. I'm not sure whether I prefer Bobby with Courtney or Loor. As a Traveler he would be better off with Loor, as a regular guy Courtney is perfect for him. I almost wish that they had continued being Travelers just helping worlds through thier turning points without Saint Dane's interference. People cause enough trouble without shape-shifting demons to need help. Well there's a fanfic right there!
The Host by Stephanie Meyer. One word. AWSOME! If you haven't read it, do. Even if you don't like science fiction, it doesn't feel like reading scifi anyway, you literally forget there are aliens involved. My favorite charecter is probably Wanderer herself. I was seriously worried towards the end there. Anyone who has read it knows what I mean, I'm not going to spoil it for anyone who hasn't. If you are a Twilight hater, read it anyway, it's better than Twilight. Get the version with the bonus chapter in the back. There is a note saying where it goes in the book so I read it there instead of going straight on to the next chapter and I think it made it better. My friend who also read it did the same thing and she's already talking about reading it again. I've read it twice myself. I really enjoyed the movie! If your biggest complaint is a single line that got cut they did a pretty good job. That line still shouldn't have been cut though.
The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. My cousin lent me the books, and then talked her grandma into getting them for me for Christmas one year. I really like the way the "love triangle" was handled in this series, and I don't usually enjoy those much (I always feel sorry for the guy who doesn't get the girl). I was a little worried about how they were going to do the movie, but I think they did a great job, can't get over the people who complained about Buttercup being the wrong color though, maybe at least some of those were joking because there was so little to complain about.
The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkein. This was the story that inspired me to be an author. I have read all four books twice and started over again when the new movie came out (it actually ended at the same point I was in the book when I saw it!) My favorite charecter is Sam, because he is so loyal to Frodo and the quest could never have been accomplished without him yet he takes none of the credit. He is an amazing person. I think Peter Jackson did an amazing job with the movies. I just realized how many times I used the word "amazing" in this paragraph. Well truth is truth.
Anything and everything writen/directed by M. Night Shyamalan! I don't care what anyone else says The Last Airbender was awesome and so are all his other movies!
Star Wars. George Lucas is a genuis! If he had done them in the order they happened, no one would have wanted to see Episode Four just because of the way Episode Three ended. As it is he had us all looking forward to and excited about Episode Three, even though we knew it would end sad! I about jumped out of my seat in theaters when they put Darth Vader's mask on I was so excited! That isn't my favorite one though. My favorite is either Episode One: The Phantom Menace or Episode Six: Return of the Jedi. The story follows so many charecters that I can't really pick a favorite. I used to read a lot of the books, but I got tired of the fact that they are always at war. Why can't it just be the Jedi doing their job? I enjoyed The Force Awakens as well, Disney seems to be doing well with them. Now if only they would get moving on actually making the Artemis Fowl movies.
Labyrinth. George Lucus and Jim Henson's story telling and effects plus David Bowie's music and acting equals one of the best movies I have ever seen! I do find it a bit creepy that David Bowie's charecter, the goblin king Jareth, was supposed to be in love with a teenage girl when he was in his forties though. Well fey do live longer so maybe it's not such a big differnce by thier standards and there wasn't much done with that anyway. My favorite song in the movie is "Dance Magic" because it's just fun, and my favorite charecter is Hoggle because he ultimatly finds the courage to stand up to Jareth, even though he's scared to death. One of my favorite things about the movie is the fact that David Bowie enjoyed playing with the kid the goblins had stolen so much that he married his live-in girlfriend so they could have a baby. As far as I know they were still married. Part of me would like to see a remake with Sarah and Jareth closer in age and more done with the romance, but I'm also afraid that they would ruin it.
Legend. I can't get over what they put Tim Curry through for that movie! It was also Tom Cruise's first movie. He did a good job. The story is amazing, it isn't your typical unicorn fairy tale. Gump is probably my favorite charecter he can be funny or serious, although somethimes when he makes me laugh I think he's actually being serious. Just a little tidbit for fans of Stargate: Atlantis and/or Star Trek: Voyager, the hag who wanted to eat Jack was played by Robert Picardo! Yes I'm sure, I checked three times when I saw his name in the credits. I can't get over that.
Howl's Moving Castle. Can you get more romantic? Absolutly not! I finally read the book! It was probably better than the movie but didn't ruin it either. All the changes they made to this one I can understand how they work better in a movie. Still it would be nice to see a live action movie that was a bit more like the book, I'm kind of in love with the idea of it being a musical. My favorite charecter is Calcifer (isn't he everybody's?). I get annoyed when I hear people going on about these romance stories with sad endings and how great they are. Now I tell them to go watch (or read) this, a romance that actually has a happy ending! Now isn't that better? Seriously why do people like sad endings? There is enough tragedy in real life without reading or watching something that is going to make you cry over people who don't even exist. Don't get me wrong, I like A Walk to Remember, but that's mostly for seeing how the situation helped the boy to straighten out, the same with The Bridge to Teribithia, those wouldn't be as good if they ended happy. But I still prefer happy endings (cue music from The Pirate Movie).
Rigelleto (not sure I spelled that right, we don't own it so I can't check). This movie is so sweet! I can't tell you who is in it, and am exceeingly vexed that it cannot be found either on netfix or amazon.com (borowed from a friend who couldn't remember where they got it[on VHS]), but it is wonderfull! I did at least find it on UTube so that's something. If you want to look it up be sure to get the 1993 one because it seems to have been based on an opera.
Willow. Yet another from George Lucas. Warick Davis was only eighteen when he played this charecter! Probably the best of Val Kilmer as well. This was also the first movie that used "morphing," as well as the largest group of "little people" in one place since The Wizard of Oz (obviously I am a fan of behind the scenes featuretts). My favorite charecter would have to be Madmartigan, he's funny and his romance story is great. He's also an amazing hero. Does anyone else think the part where he slips in the snow while showing off with his sword was originally a blooper? The browinies are funny too, my sister and I quote their "we go that way!" stuff all the time, and now our younger cousin is doing it. I was surprised at how much she liked this movie, but she wants to watch it almost every time she visits.
The Chronicles of Narnia. I would have to say my favorite out of these (including the books) is Voyage of the Dawn Treader. I can't really say why, maybe for seeing Eustace grow up or maybe because of Repicheep. My favorite charecter is Lucy. Actually in The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe it's Tumnus (I was so glad they gave him more of a part in the movie!), but he's only in that one so out of all the them it would have to be Lucy.
Stardust. Finally found and read the book!. Again it was different from the movie without making me feel like the movie ruined it. Although there was little more detail on the "romance" scene with Tristran's father than I really felt comfortable with, but not enough to make me put it down. My favorite charecter is probably Captain Shakespeare, just because he's so funny. "I'm thinking legendary English playwrite, my crew are thinking shake spear." I like how Tristan grows up as well. Apparently I like coming of age stories. And romances, provided they don't overdo triangles.
Music and Lyrics. Wow, I think this is the first one on here that isn't a fantasy! I like both musicals and romances, so of course I love this story. (of course most musicals are romances) I like how the songs are actually part of the story in this one instead of just randomly popping up. I love the old Rogers and Hammerstein musicals, but using the music to help the story instead of the story as an excuse for music definitely makes it better.
Favorite T.V. Series
Doctor Who. My dad got me started on this, the first episode he showed my sister and I was "The Five Doctors" which he admitted to doing just to see our confused faces. Since then I have been addicted to the series and I was incredibly excited when they brought it back in 2005. My favorite Doctors are: Matt Smith (11), David Tennent (10), Sylvester Mcoy (7 and last of the originals), and Tom Baker (4 and the longest running with seven seasons before he retired from it), in that order, I think, it's pretty close. I do think I like the new ones better just because they can do the aliens better with today's technology. I love how they do prosthetics and animatronics instead of CGI whenever possible! This series was the first real science fiction on television, unless you count The Twilight Zone which is usually thought of as ghost stories anyway. The original with William Hartnell aired on the same day President Kennedy was assissinated and C.S. Lewis (author of The Chronicles of Narnia) died, so it didn't get the attention it deserved at first, but the next week audiences were amazed. When William Harnell got too old and sick to play the Doctor the series was still too popular to cancel so the writers came up with the idea of regeneration. As a result the original series lasted twenty-seven years and saw seven actors as the Doctor: William Hartnell, Patrick Troughton, John Pertwie, Tom Baker, Peter Davison, Colin Baker, and Sylvester Mcoy as well as two films starring Peter Cushing as a human version of the Doctor. In 1996, ten years after the original series was cancelled, Paul McGan played the eighth Doctor in a television movie. In 2005 the series was officially resurrected with Cristopher Eccleston as the ninth Doctor who was replaced by David Tennent after just one 13-episode season, and he was eventually replaced by Matt Smith, and the only way any of this matters enough for you to read the whole thing is if you are waiting for the new season and Peter Capaldi to take up the role. Sorry, once I get started I am immpossible to stop. I've given up trying to keep track of which and how many of my favorite authors are fans of this series, there's just too many of them! Well that just tells you how good it is. 50 Years and still going strong!
Avatar: the Last Airbender.I actually started watching this because I liked the movie M. Night Shyamalan did of it so much. Also I consider it an anime just because it was done in that style. Now that I've got that out of my system, my favorite charecter is Zuko, he just tries so hard all the time to do the right thing even if he screws up. I think that refusing to fight his father is actually proof of how strong he is. Not that that (beep) deserved any respect. Azula is scary. Just had to say it. I like Ty Lee though, how come she didn't get a boyfriend on the show? I mean a real one, not just the random guys trying to flirt with her. And I still ship Zutara. Why do I always go for the ones that don't happen? Maybe someday I'll pick a ship that actually sails. Not that it makes or breaks this series, it's still good regardless and I've lost count of the times I've watched it. I liked Legend of Korra too, but not quite as much.
Stargate:Atlantis. This is the only Stargate seris I have seen all of, but from what I have seen of the others it would still be my favorite. For some reason one of my freinds has it in her head the Rodney Mckay and I would be a perfect couple. I like him as a charecter on the show, but in reality I would probably end up killing him within a week. I am glad Dr. Keller is the one who has to put up with him. I do wish they hadn't cancelled the series, or that they would at least make a movie about what happens after the series finalle. It was sort of a cliff-hanger, not as bad as some of the season finlalies, but still. For my favorite charecter...I'm gonna have to go with Michael. Yes the wraith. He has my dad's name. Okay that's not why I like him, I guess I just feel sorry for him, the team was asking for trouble on that one. I do not blame Teyla for killing him when he went after her baby though. Still it was their fault to begin with.
Sliders. This is another one my dad got me started on. I remember watching episodes with him when I was too young to understand what was going on. All I knew was that daddy liked it, so I watched just to spend time with him. Now though I understand it and I like just because I do. I always have liked parallel dimension stories and now that I think about it, it was probablly this show that got me started on that. The cool part is that one of the actors had a brother. That probably explains why there were so many stories with them meeting his double. Later in the series his brother became a regular playing -- his brother!
Bleach. I've lost count on how many times my sister and I have watched this! My dad has watched some and seems to enjoy it when he does but my mom can't get into it although she did come up with an explanation for the title, Bleach is a cleansing agent and Shinigami's jobs involve cleansing souls. She's smart. My favorite charecter is Captain Toushirou Hitsugaya, at least as is in the show. For fanfiction ideas it's Orihime and Ulquiorra, most of my stories probably involve getting them together somehow, but it's also that I think they both had a lot of potential that got ignored. I'm really pissed off that they killed him, Orihime would so not just stand there and let someone die! Even my sister cried at that scene and she's an Ishihime fan. I have to rein in my Ulqiorra fangirlness around her, I'm not very good at it but she agrees with me about Toushirou, so that's not so bad. And we just have fun teasing each other about our different pairing since it's the first time we've really disagreed on that. Does anyone else think an Ulquirra vs. Hitsugaya fight would be awesome? Why didn't they do that? They really missed an opportunity when they killed him. I really need to stop ranting about that.
American Dragon:Jake Long. The animation could be better, but the stories make up for that as far as I'm concerned. My sister and I got some weird looks from our mom while we were watching this. Apparantly she didn't like the ramdomosity. My favorite charecter is probably Spud, because he's a genuis but he pretends not to be. He may be jealous of Jake's Amdrag thing, but he's always there to support him when it counts. I'm not sure he should put up with that cheerleader wanting to be sneaky about dating him, but at least she's not going out with a guy who fits her image while she does it. Now if only Trixie could get Nigel's attention...oh well. Does anyone else think this would make an awsome live-action movie?
W.I.C.T.H. My mom freaked out when she found out we were watching a show called witch. I don't know how many times we explained that it was just the girl's initials. My favorite charecter is either Hay Lin, because she's such a happy person, or Irma, because she's just funny. For a while I just called Caleb "Awesome dude" because I couldn't remember his name, but he was always doing stuff that had me saying "Awesome!" Sometimes I still call him that just for the fun of it. Blunk is funny, I like how everyone claims not to like him, but as soon as they find out he's in trouble they come running.
X-Men Evolution. This is the best of the X-men, including the movies (I haven't read the comics though, I'm sure anyone who has would say they are better). Rouge is my favorite charecter, not sure why, she just is. I like Kurt too, 'cuz he's just funny. I'm so glad they didn't bring the Pheonix into it! I get so tired of that storyline. I'm not sure what my favorite episode is, but I really like the ones when the X-men and the Brotherhood have to work together.
N.C.I.S. This show is addictive! You can tell they put a lot of research into this. My favorite charecter is Abby (duh). I do wish they hadn't killed Kate, but I like Ziva so that's not so bad. Tony gets on my nerves, espsially with the way he treats McGee. Of course I also wish McGee would grow up and stop putting up with that nonsence. I haven't seen all the seasons yet, so maybe he has and I don't know yet.
Heroes. Back to science fiction. My favorite charecter is Sylar. Has been since season one. I blame Zachary Quinto's acting, anyone who can play a serial killer and make you feel sorry for him (I just wanted to hug him when he accidentally killed his mother!) is an amazing actor. I love the way it ended! Claire finally comes out of hiding, and Sylar finally gets his chance to be a hero. My mom says they only made him a good guy because of the "dirty letter" I sent to the writers. I did not write that letter. I wanted to, but I didn't. I'm still glad they did it. And I hope noone who hasn't seen the ending of the series is reading this! Oops! Spoilers, Sweetie!
The 10th Kindom. I am an idiot! I was looking for it spelled out when it was spelled with the number! That is embarassing. At least I know now. Anyway, my favorite charecter is Wolf. I waited a week between seeing the first disk and the other two (mess up with netflix), and during that time I guessed who Virginia's mother was. I thought it was an I would, but they wouldn't thing, but they did! Amazingly my dad, who is usually pretty good at guessing surprising plot twists didn't. He actually gasped when they revealed it!
Dinotopia. There was a series too, but it only lasted one season. There are also a lot of books. All because James Gurney decided to come up with a place that all the "lost cities" he painted could exsist. I will probably write for the series, but I was trying to limit my favorites to ten each, so I put it here. My favorite charecter is LaSage. She is unpredictable! You never know if she is going to help the heroes or cause trouble. She didn't get to be in charge of the Outsiders for nothing!
Alice. The SyFy version. (Why they spell SyFy like that is beyond me) I was lucky enough to see both halves at the same time and bought it as soon as it came out on DVD. This is the best Wonderland movie I have ever seen! Hatter is my favorite charecter, but Charlie isn't too far behind him. I felt sorry for the king, but why he was so in love with the queen I don't know. She didn't deserve him. Did anyone else notice that he was played by the same actor who played Myles O'Brian on Star Trek: The Next Generation and Deep Space Nine? And am I the only one who hears Josh Groban singing "Machine" when he's refusing to leave the falling-apart tea shop? Maybe I should see if there is a video with that on UTube.
Voyage of the Unicorn. There is a unicorn in it, but not much, the title is actually refering to the name of the ship that Professor Asling (Beu Bridges) and his daughters Miranda and Cassie sail on through the Landscape of Imagination. That sounded incredibly little kiddish. It isn't. There are trolls, and battles, and a dragon, as well as references to Greek mythology that little kids wouldn't get. Maybe about the same age-group as Percy Jackson, but adults can like it too. It's based on the book The Voyage of the Basset (I know, stupid title), which I have been unable to find. My favorite charecter is Cassie because she's the one I'm most like.
Merlin. The one with Sam Neil, Issabella Rosalini (love saying that name!), Martin Short, and Helena Boham Carter. Most people hear Martin Short's name and think "comedy." They did talk on the behind the scenes about how there was never a quiet moment with him on set, but he plays a truly heartbreaking scene in this. He is an amazing actor! I cry every time I watch this and it's all his fault!
The Color of Magic. Can you get funnier? NO! I have read some of the Discworld novels but I have yet to find this one at our library. Not sure if they don't have it or if it's always checked out. Anyway, I can't really pick a favorite character because they're all just great. It's so funny to see old Cohen running aroud being a hero, and of course Twoflower is ...well...Twoflower. come to think of it my favorite charecter is probably Death.
The Hogfather. This was the one that introduced me to the world of Terry Pratchett. It's been years since I've first seen it and I still haven't found the book! How can something so popular be so hard to find? Well, I guess it will turn up sooner or later. I'm gonna have to stick with Death as my favorite character, it's just so much fun to see him dressed up as the Hogfather. (Discworld's version of Santa)
The Tin Man. This is to The Wonderful Wizard of Oz What Alice is to Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. A more adult, modern-day version of the story. I think Azkadelia (spelling?) is my favorite charecter, she was certainly the best actress in it! Of course I also like the other charecters as well.
Artoly, Hartemis, Hollimis, whatever you want to call them Artemis and Holly are perfect together! Notice that you get all those cool names for them, but if you try to pair Holly with Trouble you get things like Trolly and Hobble. Is it just me, or is this a sign? (just kidding I don't really think it's a sign, but it is funny). Oh and about the age difference, I get the point, but Holly can wait for him to grow up. Meanwhile I will let her date Trouble. (or my OC Rowan Long, insert evil grin). I get why it didn't happen in the books and if they ever get around to making the movies I don't really want it shoehorned in, but I will write stories where they get together after Arty finishes growing up.
Root/Vinyaya. If they hadn't been married to the job they would have been married to each other!
Trouble/Fiona. This one is mean of me because Fiona is my OC, Holly's sister. She's not in the books so I'm going to have to do something to explain that. Still, she's an archeaologist and Trouble majored in ancient history. Sounds to me like they would be perfect together. (I did not do that on purpose)
Minerva/Fletcher(Halfmoon) Hey, if I won't let her be with Artemis I should at least give her somebody right? Besides, I honestly think they would be great together!
Addie/Rhys. This goes without saying.
Meryl/Drault. See above.
Perceabeth. No idea if I spelled that right, but it sounds cool and they're great together!
Cimorean/Mendanbar. They got married so I don't really have a choice.
Morwen/Telemain. I Jumped off my bed and scared a cat when I read that they were finally getting married!
Wanda/Ian. I loved his line!
Melanie/Jared. If they hadn't been together Wanda and Ian wouldn't have met. Not mention everything Melanie went through to find him.
Harry/Ginny. She's had a crush on him since before he knew she existed.
Ron/Hermione. It was just obvious.
Dramione. I have to honest, I'm not upset that she ended up with Ron, but I'll probably write more stories for this pairing, there's just something about the "good girl/bad boy" relationship that apeals to me. A fact that has my mother seriously worried, probably with good reason.
Rose/Scorpio. It's the closest to cannon Dramione we're gonna get. (Ron was just asking for it in that last scene anyway).
Aragorn/Arwen. They went through too much not to end up together! Besides I can use them to argue that it's possible for Artemis and Holly. (just kidding, but I do do that.)
Sarah/Jareth. I know I said it was creepy, but he's so sweet to her! Even though she's a brat to start with.
Jack/Lilly. After everything they went through they better stick together.
Howl/Sophie. See Han/Lea.
Madmartigan/Sorsha. She changed sides for him, it doesn't get more romantic than that!
Willow/Kaya. Well he was married to her at the beginning of the movie, I couldn't tear them apart.
Tristan/Yvan. Like I was gonna say anything else!
Alex/Sophie. If you need an explanation you have not seen the movie. (Music and Lyrics)
Doctor/Romana. Rose wasn't the worst companion, but I honestly don't see why the Doctor would be interested in her romanticaly. Romana on the other hand is perfect for him. (I still get excited every time Rose comes back)
Doctor/River Song. Yeah, I know I just said Romana is perfect for him, but she is stuck in another dimension so River can have him.
Doctor4/Sarah Jane. What Whovian doesn't see this?
Zutara! I don't care how the series ended, Aang is only 12 for crying out loud! Katara acts way too much like his mother to see him as a romantic interest, and what are the odds his crush on her will last forever anyway? Not to mention that Zuzu took a lightning bolt for her. Let me see Aang do that!
Taang. Toph is closer to his age and he needs someone who will push him, not smother and protect him like Katara does. At least Toph would let him grow up!
Soki. Did I get that right? Anyway, Suki is perfect for Sokka since they're both warriers and she actually gets his sense of humor.
Jet/Mai. I just felt like I had to put Mai with someone since I took Zuko from her. I could see her with Jet though. Too bad he died. :(
Ty Lee/Haru. They were the only ones who didn't have anybody, so I thought I would put them together. I actually thought about putting her with Jet, but I think he goes better with Mai. Besides if Jet and Ty Lee did get together the name for them would be Jet Lee, which would just make everyone laugh.
Rodney/Jeniffer. She actually puts up with him, he better stick with her!
IchiRukia. She always gets him back on his feet when he gets depressed, he needs a strong girl.
Ulquihime. She helps him figure the heart out and he makes her stronger (Ok he got slaped for it, but who doesn't love that scene? Even if they don't like the pairing it's great seeing Orihime actually stand up for herself!)
HitsuKarin. So perfect for each other! Bet Ichigo gets overprotective though.
GinRan. Just think about everything he went through for her! Kind of wish they had given us more details on that. Too bad he died :(
Shuhei/Rangiku. Since Gin died I could see her with him. If Gin had lived it would be no competition. However I will probably write for both pairings so I thought I ought to give the poor guy some credit.
UrahYori. You honestly think these two have been abstaining for a hundred years? Unlikely.
Uryuu/Nemu. Not sure what their name is, but it I do think they would be great together. (OK I felt guilty for putting Orihime with someone else when I originally wanted her with him so I picked a pairing that actually exists)
Izuru/Momo. It's so cute how he always blushes when he talks to her!
Jake/Rose. Are there really any other options?
Will/Matt. His feelings for her were so strong that he was able to break through Narrissa's spell on him. Need I say more?
Irma/Martin. It will happen.
Cornielia/Caleb. No, not the Caleb from Young and Stupid, the Caleb that is actully on the show. (like you didn't know that) Well, he embarases himself for her, she has to love that.
Romy. I know Gambit is older than Rouge, but once she graduates high school why not? Besides it was obvious the first time they met that they were both attracted.
Lancitty. I'm just a helpless romantic! Like I said, good girl/bad boy. Not that he's that bad, at least in this version.
Peter/Emma. He can talk to her like she's a real person even though she's deaf. It seems like not many people do this.
Sylar/me. Just kidding! (Although that would be awesome!) Actually in the show I would want him with Claire, after all they're both going to live pretty much forever. Maybe we'll see this in the new series?
Virginia/Wolf. He is so sweet! How can she not fall for him?!
Carl/Marion. Honestly I don't know if I would put up with as much from him as she does. If he dumps her he's out of luck.
Alice/Hatter. She really should have realized she liked him alot sooner, although I can kind of understand why she didn't.
Jack/Duchess. I don't know her name, but she risked a lot for him.
Allan Aisling/Medusa. They went through a lot together.Besides he made her magic glasses!
Miranda/Sebastian. No, not the crab, the elf. He is so sweet and you can tell he likes her right away.
Merlin/Nimue. Umm...Well that's what happens in the show.
Fetch/Morgan. "Am I beautiful?" "Oh yes, beyond words!" Enough said. (cries)
"Who told the monkeys to stop having baby humans, and why don't humans have baby monkeys?" My mom.
"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival." C.S. Lewis
"As long as we can dream there will be unicorns." Bruce Coville.
"Logic is just a way to be wrong with authority!" The Doctor (2).
"Logic is not the end of wisdom, but the begining." Spock.
"Confidence is ignorance, if you're feeling cocky it's because there's something you don't know." Foaly to Captain Holly Short in Artemis Fowl, by Eoin Colfer.
"Pride is not the opposite of shame, but it's source." General Iroh.
"Step follows step/Hope follows courage/Set your face toward danger/Set your heart on victory." From The Two Princesses of Bamarre, by Gail Carson Levine.
"Sign broke. Come in for message." on a church sign.
"Need a life guard? Mine walks on water." bumper sticker.
"Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for thou art crunchy and quite tasty with ketchup." bumper sticker.
"Life doesn't fit into little boxes that were drawn for it." Samuel L. Jackson as Elijah Price in Unbreakable.
"It's not the face, but the expressions on it. It's not the voice, but what you say. It's not how you look in that body, but what you do with it. You are beautiful." Ian to Wanda/Wanderer in The Host, by Stephanie Meyer.
Mulch: Okay,okay. I think, that if they make up, get married, blah, blah, blah, and have little minions - er babies, and these little devils have Holly's sense of obedience and Artemis' brains...The world is doomed.
Foaly: Sadly, I agree.
From "The Bond" by Bunny with Evil Intention.
Trouble: You could have just let her kill me.
Artemis: I think of the repercussions, not the pleasure of the action.
From "The Bond" by Bunny with Evil Intention.
"I don't mind confirming bad news, but I hate to break it." Turnball Root, in Artemis Fowl: The Atlantis Complex, by Eoin Colfer.
"As long as you need me, but do not want me then I must stay. When you want me, but no longer need me then I have to go." Nanny McPhee.
"Here we either live happily ever after, or we get killed by horrible curses." Scott Cohen as Wolf in The Tenth Kingdom.
"Here's another curse, may all your bacon burn!" Calcifer in Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wyne Jones. (actually I like my bacon burnt)
Virginia: I have a hard time trusting people. I just never want to jump unless I'm sure someone's going to catch me.
Wolf: I'll catch you. And if I miss for any reason I will sit by your bedside and nurse you back to health.
from The Tenth Kingdom.
"Let River go and leave now, or I'll give you something to weep about!" Doctor 15 to the Weeping Angels in "Spoilers Sweetie" by Rupzy Daisy.
"I like nonsense - it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living. It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope...and that enables us to laugh at all of life's realities." Dr. Suess.
Artemis: I have finished unfinished symphonies.
Doctor: I've met the composers who left them unfinished.
from the AF/DW crossover "Time Paradoxes Come Back to Haunt You" by Ruzy Daisy.
"Decision allows three choices: Do what you want, Do what others do, Do what is right." unknown
"The hero isn't the strongest, or the fastest, or the smartest, or the best-looking. The hero is the one who, no matter how hard, does what he knows is right." From Veggie Tales: The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything.
"I had a mishap. A steel beam fell on my head." Chad on Bleach.
"The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and simple." Oscar Wilde.
"Sometimes my life is sad, sometimes my life is boring, sometimes my life is mad, and sometimes my life is REALLY BORING." my friends six-year-old sister.
"Some people act like they have a brain, but they really don't." Same six-year-old.
"I claim to have no emotions. I never said I do not have sense of humor." Ulquiorra in "Bat Out of Hell" by Cap'n Green.
"Things that try to look like things often look more like things than things." Granny Weatherwax in Wyrd Sisters by Terry Pratchett.
Tatski: Gods, Orihime, I really hope your head is screwed on straight still! dating a guy who is all these bad things, and he held you prisoner?
Orihime: Well he didn't. He just did the kidnapping...
From "Two Hearts, One Love" by ResurectionBANKAI
The Infamis Copy and Pastes (like you didn't see it coming)
Be Against Abortion!
Mommy I am only 8 inches long but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.
Mommy today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.
You know what Mommy I'm a boy!! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too and I cry with you even though you can't hear me.
Mommy my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.
You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby. I think and feel. Mommy, what's abortion?
I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy! HELP me!
Mommy I am okay. I am in Jesus’ arms. He is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why didn't you want me Mommy?
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped. Two more eyes that will never see. Two more hands that will never touch. Two more legs that will never run. One more mouth that will never speak.
If you're against abortion, please re-post this. It could convict someone else too. :)
...sniff sniff... This made me cry... AND I DON'T CRY!!! ...sniff...
This is a story about God. Read if you believe in Him, and read even if you don't.
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been killed in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking God for her safety, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98% of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93% of the people that read this won’t repost it?
I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The Cashier said, 'I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.' Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. 'It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.' I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.' His eyes were so sad while saying this. 'My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: 'I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.' Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me 'I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.' 'I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.' Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. 'Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'' 'OK' he said, 'I hope I do have enough.' I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money!' Then he looked at me and added, 'I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!'' 'I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' 'My mommy loves white roses.' A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.
Mary had a little Lamb, His fleece was white as snow. And everywhere that Mary went, that Lamb was sure to go. He followed her to school one day, t'wasn't even in the rule. It made the children laugh and play, to have a Lamb at school. And then the rules all changed one day, illegal it became; To bring the Lamb of God to school, or even speak His name! Every day got worse and worse, and days turned into years. Instead of hearing children laugh, we heard gunshots and tears. What must we do to stop the crime that's in our schools today? Let's the Lamb come back to school, and teach our kids to pray.
Just because we can eat animals for food, doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, meat (well, not meat), etc... Copy this into your profile
Life isn't passing me by; it's trying to run me over.
If you want J.K.R. to make a series about the Marauders, copy this into your profile.
If you love the Marauders AND think they are THE best, copy this into your profile.
If mythical creatures exist (dragons, unicorns, phoenixes, etc.), copy this onto your profile!
"Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried to slam a revolving door,"- Unknown
They say guns don't kill people, people kill people, but honestly I think guns have something to do with it because if someone just stood there and said "bang," I don't think many people would be dead... (I'm not against guns, but this made me laugh)
Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Please Note: CHRISTMAS IS CANCELLED Apparently you told Santa that you have been good this year...he died laughing.
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird.
"It's always in the last place you look" Well DUH! Because you stop looking after you find it! HELLO!
If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you love reading, copy this into your profile
If you and fictional characters have conversations in your head, paste this to your profile.
If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.
I'm not suffering from insanity, I love it.
If you have a story in your head, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you daydream about fighting monsters, but quiver in fear before a spider, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a small but dedicated circle of friends, copy and pate this into your profile.
If you like anime or manga, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have embarrasing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile.
If you love to play pranks on your best friend, copy and paste this to your profile!
If you sometimes talk to yourself copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever spent too much time on the computer, copy and paste this to your profile
If you think that Christine from Phantom of the Opera needs brain surgery, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever wished you could jump into a movie/book and smack a character for being so incredibly stupid, copy this into your profile.
If you are so obsessed with Musical Theatre that you randomly start quoting it, copy this into your profile.
If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word, and you do at random moments, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you are obsessed with ANYTHING and it scares some of your friends copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you're stalking a fictional character copy this to your profile.
If you are guilty of doing a British, Irish, Australian, Southern accent or Elvis impression, copy this in your profile
If you are against Yaoi, copy and paste this onto your profile!!!!!
If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven.
Ninety-six percent of teens in the world today don't stand up for God. If you are one of the 4 percent that does put this in your profile.
Even when you can’t see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile
I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor". A long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck, my friends, for I may not return alive. (I know this is embarassing at 22, but hey truth is truth)(Update my room is actually pretty clean now, but this is still funny)
D* put this
God gave us two legs to walk, two arms to touch, two ears to hear, and two eyes to see. But why did he give us only one heart? To find the other that is in your soulmate.
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation, UNDER GOD, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all. If you think UNDER GOD should stay in the pledge of allegiance, copy and paste this onto your profile.
My Faith:Jesus Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master... He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher... He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer... He had no army, yet kings feared him... He won no military battles, yet he conquered the world... He committed no crime, yet they crucified him... He was buried in a tomb, yet He still lives today... Feel honored to serve such a leader who loves us... If you beleive and God and Jesus Christ is His son... Then copy and paste this into your profile If you ignore him, in the Bible, Jesus says.. "If you deny me before man, I will deny you before my father in Heaven..."
-93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Edward's One True Love, oceaneyes85253, TheEmoSideOfMe, EdwardlovesChristyalways, Blue eyed vampwolf, finger craker,MegCabotRules, Brown-eyedCullenGirl,slytherinangel01, Sargerogue, RAHbooks
Add this to you profile if you think it's funny:
Father:"You’re in big trouble Miss!" Child: "I didn’t do anything!" Father: "YOU KICKED HIM!!" Child: "It was an accident!" Father:"In the Face...?" Child: "My foot slipped..." Father: "Five times?!" Child: ...
You know you live in the 21st century when...
1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years.
3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screenname or myspace.
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.
6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.
11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.
12) Copy and paste this into your profile if you fell for it and I know you did.
Did you know the average person only reads three books per year? If you do not even believe it is possible to read that little, copy and paste this to your profile.
98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you are one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this to your profile.
95 percent of teenagers are worried about being popular. If you are part of the 5 percent who are not, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you use made-up words from books (D'arvitt, racdrops, ect.) instead of curse words, copy and paste this to your profile.
One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa beans, and all beans are a vegetable?
Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27, 2006, because it was "too small" and "off its orbit" for some scientists' likings. If you think Pluto should still be a planet, copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO!!!
One and Only Wish
1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.
2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?
3. Your first initial?
4. Your month of birth?
5. Which color do you like more, black or white?
6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.
7. Your favorite number?
8. Do you like California or Florida more?
9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?
10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).
Are you done?
If so, scroll down
1. You are completely in love with this person.
2. If you choose:
Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.
Black: You are conservative and aggressive.
Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.
Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you
Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are
3. If your initial is:
A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.
L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to
S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.
4. If you were born in:
Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you
fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but
the memories will last forever.
July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life
changing experience for the good.
Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your
5. If you choose...
Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time
but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.
White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do
anything for you, but you may not realize it.
6. This person is your best friend.
7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.
8. If you choose...
9. If you choose...
10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday
OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on.
These warnings are an example of the results of our dear friends death:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Too late!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (As night follows day . . .)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope.)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I gotta admit, I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash.)
On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". (So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon.)
On a Myer hairdryer:"Do not use while sleeping."(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."(Wow. That's really helpful)
On a child's superman costume:"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly". (Aw, that's the whole purpose of buying the costume!)
On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands".(Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions:"Put on fork and eat."(No! Really? We're supposed to eat food?!)
On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how??)
On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But, it's just a suggestion).
On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a Korean knife: “Keep out of children” (I should bloody well hope so!)
Boeing 757-"Fragile. Do not drop" (That means you, Hulk! Put that bloody aeroplane down, you might drop it!)
Scoopable cat litter-"safe to use around pets" (Again, I should bloody well hope so!)
Endust duster-"This product is not defined flammable by the consumer products safety commission regulations. However this product can be ignited under certain circumstances" (That's right, who doesn't use their dusters as kindling?)
Baby oil-"Keep out reach of children." (Good thing babies aren't children, isn't it!)
Hair coloring-"Do not use as an ice cream topping." (Yeh. My grandmother died because she thought my hair dye was ice-cream topping and put it in a sundae)
Komatsu Floodlight-"This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark" (OMG!! That's as amazing as a newsreader reading the news!)
Earplugs-"These earplugs are nontoxic, but they may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe." (Are you sure? Lets experiment.)
RCA television remote control-"Not dishwasher safe." (again now they tell me)
Road sign-"Caution: water on road during rain." (No. Shit. Sherlock)
FANFICTION- UNITED NATIONS! Has anyone else noticed how a lot of us get along and make friends on here and we can be from completely different countries? We're here making world peace on the INTERNET and we have all those ambassadors and senators and whatever struggling with it! If you realize this (or read this and agreed) copy and paste this and add your name and country (country is optional) to the list. SPREAD THE PEACE!:
Naruto-fan-Okami-chan (USA), DGMSilverAirHead03(USA), Crystal Amethyst (Armenia), InoueR0xO (Pakistan), poohxebony (USA), DreamingInThePast (Spain), loves2readandwrite (USA), SeaDevil (Sweden), Vampgal212 (U.K.), Verdigurl ( New Zealand), Animerockchic (Republic of Ireland), Momoka64 (USA), Ve Kuraresa Bleach (USA), AFleetingPhantom (U.K.), EpicHeroLaugh(USA), Fruity-Dragonfly (USA), 9foxgrl (USA), Potato Jam 7 (USA), Bookworm1756 (Canada), IzztreeRocks912 (USA), randomosity4arty (USA), RAHbooks (USA)
So this is the end of my profile. Mama's fudge to those who actually read the whole thing, Daleks for those who skipped. (Just kidding)