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Author has written 7 stories for Gakuen Alice.
Hi! I'm Lisa! I live in (insert city here), go to (insert school here) and am (insert age here).
I like to read manga, watch anime, play video games, read fanfics, etc. Scratch that, I love to read manga. My favorites include; Fullmetal Alchemist, Hetalia, Katekyo Hitman Reborn, Fairy Tail, D. Gray Man, Oresama Teacher, Gintama, No. 6, Hunter x Hunter, Liar Game, Claymore, Dengeki Daisy, and many others. I have read hundreds of manga series, and I'm NOT exaggerating. My favourite books are the Percy Jackson Series, the Artemis Fowl series, and the Hunger Games Series. My favourite songs include When You're Gone, Melt, Happy Synthesizer, Fallout, Crybaby's Ensemble, and All To Myself. My favourite video games include The Legend of Zelda series and The World Ends With You, cuz both are epically awesome! I like to copy and paste stuff on my profile, especially funny and sweet stuff. PM me if you have any suggestions for my stories or spot any typos, or even if you just feel like it. Oh, and one more thing; I like reviews.
If you plan to read the stuff below, the underlined stuff are great. If I bold them, that's even better. If they are italicized, they're the best!
I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random (Or can be at times) and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up.
He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
This is this cat.
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
Ways to make sure you're insane
At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.
Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy"
Ask your dog if it's comfortable with its name. Repeat with cat, until people ask if you're alright.
As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
Specify that your drive-through order is "to go"
Sing along at the opera.
Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you’re not in the mood.
When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I WON! I WON!"
When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives! They're loose!"
FRIENDS: Lend you their umbrella
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!
Friends: Bring you a tissue to dry your tears.
Best Friends: Have a shovel ready to bury the asshole who did this to you.
FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: Keep on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"
FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.
BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.
FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"
FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.
BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (Aka: drinking buddies)
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when the guy rejects you
FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts:
1) Seamus Finnigan is not after me lucky charms
2) I will not sing "we're off to see the wizard" when sent to the Headmaster's office.
3) I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class
4) I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss
5) Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda
6) Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar
7) First years are not allowed to be fed to Fluffy
8) I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his "time of the month"
9) I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals
10) I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin quidditch matches
12) When Death-Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Bat Moblie, Robin!"
13) When a class-mate falls asleep, I shall not take advantage of the fact and draw a Dark Mark on his arm.
14) It's not necessary for me to yell "BURN!" every time Snape takes house points from Gryffindor
15) Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is simply coincidental
16) I will not refer to the Weasley Twins as "bookends"
17) I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my Calculus book.
18) I will not hold my wand in the air before I casting spells shouting "I got the power!"
19) It’s not necessary for me to yell "Bam!" everytime I apparate.
20) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music when wandering the halls.
21) "To conquer the earth with flying monkeys" is not an appropriate career choice.
22) I am not allowed to make lightsaber sounds with my wand.
23) I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs.
24) I will not slip Malfoy a Love Potion in his morning goblet of Pumpkin Juice.
25) I will not say the phrase "Dude, get a life" to Voldemort.
26) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.
27) I will not refer to the Accio charm as "the Force".
28) I will not call Dumbledore "Santa Claus!" during the Christmas Holidays.
29) I will not put Muggle fairy book in the History section at the library.
30) I will not send Snape a bar of soap for Christmas.
16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"
Repost this if you laughed, or if you plan on doing any of those things!
If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The pahomoneal
pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a
rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't
mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer
be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling
was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!
If you could read that put it it your profile.
37 Things to do in an Elevator
1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at each floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.
23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell people that you can see their aura.
35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..."
I OWE MY MOTHER
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
19. My mother taught me ESP.
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
21. My mother taught me IRONY...again.
22. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
23. My mother taught me GENETICS.
24. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
25. My mother taught me WISDOM.
26. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile
I WANT A GUY...
Someone who would sing to me at random moments.
Who would let me sleep on his chest.
A BOY who would get mad at someone if they called me UGLY or were mean to me.
I want someone who would call me 3 times a day if he went away.
He would throw stuffed animals at me when I acted dumb and then
Someone who would make fun of me just to make me laugh.
He would take me to the park and
give me big bearhugs all the time.
He would tell all his friends about me and SMILE when he did.
And we'd make out in the pouring rain.
He would never be afraid to say "I love you" in front of his friends,
and we'd argue about silly things and then make up.
I want a boy who would kiss me at midnight on New Years
Someone who would tell me I'm beautiful but not too often,
who would make me laugh like NO ONE else could.
But mostly, I want someone who would be my best friend and would never BREAK MY HEART
Bad pick-up Line Come-backs
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Man: Is this seat empty?
Man: Your place or mine?
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
A Real Boyfriend
- Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.
-When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her
- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her (I wish!! -fieryhazel)
- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.
- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.
- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it's stupid.
- Give her the world.
- Let her wear your clothes.
- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.
- Let her know she's important.
Guys post as: "I'd be this Boyfriend."
Girls post as: "A real Boyfriend."
Did you know...
"I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants."
"To the world, you may be just one person, but to one person, you may be the world"
"In a world of Cheerios, be a Fruit Loop!"
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss"
"Within you I lose myself. Without you, I find myself wanting to become lost again"
"Remember: Don't Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river."
"Men came before women because every masterpiece needs a rough draft"
"If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives."
"'There are three sides of an arguement -- your side, my side and the right side."
"What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?"
"Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult."
"The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on."
"If you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers."
"When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room."
"The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do."
"In God we trust; all others must pay cash."
"Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else."
"I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places."
"Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die."
"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."
"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing."
"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils."
"After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."" (btw, that means 'I don't speak English' T-T)
"There are no stupid questions, just stupid people."
"Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid."
"The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think."
"The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory."
"Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?"
"Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film."
"If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button."
"The road to success is always under construction."
3 EASIEST WAYS TO DIE:
1.Have a cigarette daily
2.Drink alcohol daily
3.Love somebody who doesn't love you back
When you are born, you are given two eyes to see,
The answer is quite simple actually...
You just have to find the other one
Join the dark side. We have cookies!
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
A good girl is just a bad girl who's never gotten caught.
Who doesn't love comebacks that make the other person sound stupid?
I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.
Very few personal problems can't be solved through suitable application of high explosives.
There are three types of people: those who can count, and those who can't.
History lesson: the dinosaurs didn't go extinct, Barney came and they all committed suicide.
Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the frisbee getting bigger?" Then I get hit in the face.
"It's not strange to argue with yourself. It's only strange to argue with yourself and lose."
Chocolate chip cookies are the best!! If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile!!
A large percentage of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you are one of the ones that do and want to deck 'em, put this in your profile.
If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive seconds... copy/paste this into profile.
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you're addicted to anime/manga, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you're a chocoholic, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you have ever tried to laugh evilly like Light Yagami, copy and paste this to your profile!
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If you ever wanted to dump a glass of water on someone's head, then copy this into your profile.
If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.
If you get pissed when your stories get no reviews but other crappy stories get 800 reviews, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile
If you have ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, copy this into your profile.
If you think being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this to your profile.
If there are times where you wanna annoy people, just for the heck of it copy this to your profile.
If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to slap yourself/someone else, put this on your profile.
If for no reason, you've laughed during a part of a movie or show that wasn't during a normally funny part, put this in your profile.
If you've ever wondered what you're like in a parallel universe, put this on your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, put this in your profile.
If you've ever done the above on purpose, put this in your profile, also.
If you have walked under something that is two feet over your head, but ducked anyway, copy and paste this onto your profile
IF YOU'VE EVER TYPED A WHOLE SENTENCE AND THEN LOOKED UP AND REALIZED THE CAPS LOCK WAS ON AT THE WRONG TIME, PUT THIS IN YOUR PROFILE
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing copy this on your profile
If you took the time to read all of these (and you usually do), copy and paste this onto your profile
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