Author has written 9 stories for Harry Potter, Mediator, Shaman King, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Fullmetal Alchemist, Inheritance Cycle, and Rise of the Guardians.
Hello to all you stalkers reading my profile! Schni10 here! Let's see, five things random things about me:
I love PJO an HP!
Fried chicken is awesome!
I like pie!
Writing is fun!
Wait...that's not all about me...oh well.
People started to stare. They weren't used to seeing a sleek sports car in their 'hood. Or maybe they were staring in wonder at the guy riding in the back who was turning blue because his knees were jammed into his throat. That would be me.
Annabeth: "Red cattle. The cattle of the sun."
I lost hope when I saw the horses' teeth.
Katara: "Sokka, you've got an elbow leech."
"I told you, we were hungry. I'm eating a giant bug!"
"Do you want me to say 'Please' and 'Thank you' as I swing my machete back and forth?"
That stuff tasted like shoes. Not that I've ever eaten shoes before, but if I had, I'm sure they would taste like this. but we had to eat something so I pretended they were Pop-Tarts. Shoe-flavor Pop-Tarts.
"Many people hear voices when no one is there.
"A writer is, after all, only half his book.
The road to hell is paved with adverbs.
Copy and Paste Time!
This is about abortion...
You know what Mommy
You went to the doctor today.
I can hear that doctor again.
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
25 REASONS I OWE MY MOTHER
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
19. My mother taught me ESP.
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
You talk to yourself a lot. (e.g. Hmm, what would happen if it was sunny the day Bella got hit by the van? Oh, story idea!! Must get computer!)
You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')
When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?')
After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'
You live off of sugar and caffine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)
You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then dissappear off the face of the earth.
You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.
You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.
No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.
The letters on your keyboard are wearing off. (once a key actually fell off!)
Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.
People think you have A.D.D.
You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.
You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.
You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason
Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.
And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.
(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)
To My Loving Wife:
A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out during one particularly icy winter. Because both had jobs, they had difficulty coordinating their travel schedules. It was decided that the husband would fly to Florida on a Thursday, and his wife would follow him the next day. Upon arriving as planned, the husband checked into the hotel. There he decided to open his laptop and send his wife an e-mail back in Minneapolis. However, he accidentally left off one letter in her address, and sent the e-mail without realizing his error.
In Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband's funeral. He was a minister of many years who had been 'called home to glory' following a heart attack. The widow checked her e-mail, expecting messages from relatives and friends. Upon reading the first message, she fainted and fell to the floor. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My Loving Wife
From: Your Departed Husband
Subject: I've Arrived!
I've just arrived and have checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
(P.S. Sure is hot down here!)
Your a book-aholic if...
You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on.
Read the book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 to continue reading.
You write fanfictions about the book.
You try to get all of your friends (and everyone else in the entire world) to read it.
Everything reminds you of the book.
You quote random lines all the time.
You try to do things that the characters do, even though you know you can't.
You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class
You've read a book more than five times.
You've read a book with 400+ pages in less than two days.
You've planned and prepared a siege on a writer's house because he/she killed a character you like.
You hate it when someone calls your favorite character fictional
You blatantly deny it when someone calls a character fictional.(Who wouldn't??)
You've found yourself trying to impersonate a character.
Your idol is a character from a book.
I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear it up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you!! IF THIS MADE YOU LAUGH COPY AND PASTE IT ON YOUR PROFILE. THIS WAS SO FUNNY!!!!
16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"
Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things
You have ADHD, are diagnosed, and are convinced that you are a demigod because of this.
2.Nico de Angelo
4. Jesse de Silva
5. Jace Wayland
9. Suze Simon
10. Harry Potter
1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
4. Can you recall any fics about Nine?
yes, a bajillion of them!
5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?
YES! I love them as a couple!
6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
8. Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
9. Is there such thing as a 1/8 fluff?
Percy/Annabeth? Uh, YEAH!
10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
11. If you wrote a songfic about Eight, what song would you choose?
12. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?
13. When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Jace A couple weeks ago.
14. "(1) and (6) are in a happy relationship until (9) runs off with (6). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (10), then follows the wise advice of (4) and finds true love with (8).”
Percy and Thalia are in a happy relationship until Suze runs off with Thalia. Percy, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Ginny and a brief unhappy affair with Harry, then follows the wise advice of jesse and finds true love with Annabeth.
YAY! Percy and Annabeth. it would be a weird fic tho.
If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.
If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
The Percy jackson Pledge:
I promise to remember Percy
I promise to remember Annabeth
I promise to protect nature
I promise to remember Luke
I promise to remember Chiron
I promise to remember Tyson
I promise to remember Thalia
I promise to remember Clarisse
I promise to remember Bianca
I promise to remember Nico
I promise to remember Zoe
I promise to remember Rachel
Yes, I promise to remember PJO
My name is Sarah,
Put this in your profile if you think that child abuse is wrong.
Went to a Party Mom --by Unknown
I went to party mom, and remembered when you said
I felt proud of myself, the way you said I would,
I made healthy choices, and you advice to me was right.
I got into my car, sure to get home in one piece,
Now I'm lying on the pavement, and I hear the policemen say,
My own blood's all around me, as I try hard not to cry,
I'm sure the guy had no idea, while he was flying high
So why do people do it, mom, knowing it ruins lives?
Tell sister not to be afraid, tell daddy to be brave,
Some one should have taught him, that is wrong to drink and drive,
My breath is getting shorter, mom,
I wish that you could hold me mom,
This is beautiful! Try not to cry!
She jumped up as soon as she saw the surgeon come out of the operating room.
She said:'How is my little boy? Is he going to be all right? When can I see him?'
The surgeon said, 'I'm sorry. We did all we could, but your boy didn't make
Sally said, 'Why do little children get cancer? Doesn't God care any more?
Where were you, God, when my son needed you?'
The surgeon asked, 'Would you like some time alone with your son? One of the
nurses will be out in a few minutes, before he's transported to the university.'
Sally asked the nurse to stay with her while she said good bye to son. She ran
her fingers lovingly through his thick red curly hair. 'Would you like a lock of
his hair ?' the nurse asked. Sally nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of the boy's
hair, put it in a plastic bag and handed it to Sally.
The mother said, 'It was Jimmy's idea to donate his body to the University for
Study. He said it might help somebody else. 'I said no at first, but Jimmy said,
'Mom, I won't be using it after I die Maybe it will help some other little boy
spend one more day with his Mom.' She went on, 'My Jimmy had a heart of gold.
Always thinking of someone else. Always wanting to help others if he could.'
Sally walked out of Children's Mercy Hospital for the last time, after spending
most of the last six months there. She put the bag with Jimmy's belongings on
the seat beside her in the car.
The drive home was difficult. It was even harder to enter the empty house. She
carried Jimmy's belongings, and the plastic bag with the lock of his hair to her
She started placing the model cars and other personal things back in his room
exactly where he had always kept them. She laid down across his bed and, hugging
his pillow, cried herself to sleep.
It was around midnight when Sally awoke. Laying beside her on the bed was a
folded letter. T he letter said:
I know you're going to miss me; but don't think that I will ever forget you,
or stop loving you, just 'caus e I'm not around to say 'I Love You'. I will
always love you, Mom, even more with each day. Someday we will see each other
again. Until then, if you want to adopt a little boy so you won't be so lonely,
that's okay with me. He can have my room and old stuff to play with. But, if you
decide to get a girl instead, she probably wouldn't like the same things us boys
do. You'll have to buy her dolls and stuff girls like, you know.
Don't be sad thinking about me. This really is a neat place. Grandma and
Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me around some, but it will take
a long time to see everything. The angels are so cool. I love to watch them fly.
And, you know what? Jesus doesn't look like any of his pictures. Yet, when I saw
Him, I knew it was Him. Jesus himself took me to see GOD ! And guess what, Mom ?
I got to sit on God's knee and talk to Him, like I was somebody important.
That's when I told Him that I wanted to write you a letter, to tell you good bye
and everything. But I already knew that wasn't allowed. Well, you know what Mom
? God handed me some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter. I
think Gabriel is the name of the angel who is going to drop this letter off to
you. Go d said for me to give you the answer to one of the questions you asked
Him 'Where was He when I needed him ?' 'God said He was in the same place with
me, as when His son Jesus was on the cross. He was right there, as He always is
with all His children.
Oh, by the way, Mom, no one else can see what I've written except you. To
everyone else this is just a blank piece of paper. Isn't that cool ? I have to
give God His pen back now He needs it to write some more names in th e Book of
Life. Tonight I get to sit at the table with Jesus for supper. I'm
Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. I don't hurt anymore The cancer is all gone.
I'm glad because I couldn't stand that pain anymore and God couldn't stand to
see me hurt so much, either. That's when He sent The Angel of Mercy to come get
me. The Angel said I was a Special Delivery! How about that?
Signed with Love from God, Jesus & Me.
If you would do this for your parents as well, please copy and paste the story this and add your name to the list: UniqueMelody, Silver Sheilds, darkness wasted, 1shadowfan, tkdprincess96,iluvpercabeth
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back.
The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.
The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."
Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''
The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''
Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.
The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.
Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.
"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."
I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry.
But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there."
His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''
My heart nearly stopped.
The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall."
Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't
forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."
Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''
"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for
the doll and even some spare money.
The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!"
Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that
mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!''
"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''
"My mommy loves white roses."
A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.
I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.
Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.
The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?
Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away.
I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.
She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.
I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister
is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.
Now you have 2 choices:
1) Repost this message.
2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner andread a book. I am the girl that people lookthrough when I saysomething. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird anda freak either behindmyback or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if peoplecall her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed withTwilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: Iheartjake1220, FaerieRose13, Dancer4Life15,Marigold Winters, SparklingTopazEyes, FairyNinjaPrincess, MyImmortal01, Twilightxfanatic21, Mimi-Love-4Ever, Melissa364, Schni10
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep-- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.
You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor.
It's always the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would I keep looking after I found it?
Some people are like a slinky..not really good for anything, but you can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
If your reading fanfics when your supposed to be studying for a major test the next day, and telling your parents your studying, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever laughed at something that you wouldn't normally laugh at because it was really late at night, copy this into your profile
If you're obsessed with PJO like me, copy this into your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.
I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
If you always look on the bright side and always judge a book/movie by its innards, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.
If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile.
If you've ever fallen going up the stairs, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a mirror, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever forgotten how old you are when someone asked you, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Profile your into this past and copy ,retard a like beginning the from this read actually you if. Now Read It Backwards
Silence is golden but duck tape is silver.
I used to be normal until i met the freaks that i call my friends
A friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much weirdo?"
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
FAKE FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
FRIENDS: Are only through school/college.
FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.
FAKE FRIENDS: Say no when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.
FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.
FAKE FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough.
FRIENDS: tell you to forget it when you say you want to vandalize a guy's house
FRIENDS: Think your insane for jumping off a roof onto a trampoline
FRIENDS: come over every couple of months for a sleepover
FRIENDS: are shy around your boyfriend
FRIENDS: don't see you if you're sick
FRIENDS: call you retarded for running threw bleachers yelling "IT'S PICKLE TIME!"
FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
Things I Am NOT allowed to do at Hogwarts:
1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.
2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office.
3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.
4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.
5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar.
6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination.
7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after me lucky charms."
8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this year’s Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.
9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month."
10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand.
12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force."
13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."
14) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.
15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.
16) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.
17) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.
18) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug a Slytherin Day."
19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.
20) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor.
21) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort.
22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy.
23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.
24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-full."
25) I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell.
26) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate.
27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.
28) I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor shall I insist that their colors indicate that they're "covered in bees."
29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.
30) I will not go to class skyclad.
31) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core."
32) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.
33) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.
34) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion.
35) I will not call the Weasly twins, "bookends."
36) I will not call the Patil twins, "bookends."
37) I will not call the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.
38) There is no such thing as a were-thylacine.
39) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts.
40) Tricking a school House Elf to strip of its clothing does not make it mine. Yes, even when I yell out "PWND!"
41) I do not weigh the same as a Duck.
42) I do not have a Dalek Patronus.
43) I will not lick Trevor.
44) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labeled, "Firewhiskey."
45) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween.
46) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself too seriously.
47) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.
48) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet.
49) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice.
50) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God.
51) But yes, I will do it all anyway.
The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not
Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?" That's a really good question...I wonder...
Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who the heck is drinking my water!
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
"I DON'T SUFFER FROM INSANITY, I ENJOY EVERY SECOND OF IT"
If you think that 'morning people' should be driven off the face of the planet so they can spread their 6-AM cheer to say, Martians, copy this into your profile.
Crazy? I was crazy once! I would sing stupid songs at school, then read books on how to read! But then I died, and people put daisies on my grave, and one is bending down and tickling me on my nose, so I'm giggling and everyone is scared of me because I'm dead and I'm not supposed to be giggling so no more daisies! I know, I'm crazy! Crazy? I was crazy once! Copy and paste this into your profile if this applies to you, and you know it does.
40 Things to do in Class when you're Bored:
1. Try to develop psychic powers, then use 'em.
Fun Things To Do In An Elevator (LOL)
1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly.
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug," then enforce it.
All in Good Time
The Real RULES:
IF SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?
Don't Stop Believing (oh, that's appropriate)
HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
Wake Me Up When September Ends (I would like to sleep through September...)
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
All Around Me (Am I having an out-of-body experience?)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Don't Funk With My Heart (um...o-kay)
WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?
Keep on Lovin' you (okay)
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
What's Left of Me (???! guys, are you okay?)
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Scars (I do?)
WHAT IS 2 + 2?
Lost in the Moment
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
This is real, This is Me (???! What is that supposed to mean)
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Thirty Point Buck (okay, I guess...)
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
The Call (?)
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Everything I Do, I Do It For You (that fits, I guess...not really...)
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Unfaithful (Is that a bad sign?)
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Use Somebody (Did I get used by people?)
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
Gives You Hell
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Sound The Bugle (this doesn't make sense)
WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
Closing Time (Okay, but I'm not at work)
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Walk Away (No! Don't leave me!)
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
All in Good Time
Your iPod On Shuffle and Copy Down the Song. It's like for a movie version of your life.
Opening credits: Broken (Seether) What does that mean?!
Waking up: Daddy's Hands (Holly Dunn) How does this relate to me waking up in the morning?
First day of school: Stronger (Kayne West) That fits, I suppose. You need to be strong to go to school!!
Falling in love: Over and Over (Three Days Grace) Hey, this one actually fits really well!
Fighting: Valentine (Martina Mcbride) ??? How does this work if I was fighting with him?
Breaking up: Rebirthing (Skillet) I guess it fits...
Driving: I cross my Heart (George Straight) Okay, 1) How did this get on my itunes and 2) this doesn't make sense
Flashback: Listen to Your Heart (DHT) If if was a flashback of the boyfriend that I previously broke up with, it makes sense.
Mental Breakdown: Sweet Dreams (Beyonce) no comment
Getting back together: All Around Me (Flyleaf) Okay, I guess.
Wedding: The Saltwater Room (Owl City) ??? Huh?
Birth of a child: Raise Your Glass (Pink) Makes sense if you're celebrating, I guess...
Final battle: Take it Off (Kesha) Weird...
Death scene: Too Little Too Late (JoJo) Um,it fits...maybe
Funeral: Not Myself Tonight (Christina Aguilera) Well of course I'm not, I'm dead!
End credits: Where'd You Go (Fort Minor) Um...okay...
Are you obsessed with Harry Potter?
Could You Prove That Statement In Court?
Do You Know Any Of The Characters Middle Name’s?
Have You Seen All The Movies?
Read All The Books?
What Do You Think Of JKR?
Group Of Characters?
Couples? What Do You Think?
This Or That?
Harry or Ron?
Hermione or Ginny?
Neville or Seamus?
Snape or Slughorn?
Fred Or George?
Harry/Ginny or Harry/Hermione?
Ron/Hermione or Harry/Hermione
Harry/Hermione or Harry/Luna?
Ron/Hermione or Ron/Luna?
Hermione/Krum or Harry/Hermione?
Ron/Lavander or Ron/Hermione?
ButterBeer or Fire Whiskey?
Zonko’s or Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes?
Hog’s Head Or The Three Broomsticks?
James/Lily or Snape/Lily?
Hogwarts or Hogsmeade?
Hogsmeade Or Diagon Alley?
Malfoy Manor or Knockturn Alley?
Beartie Bott’s or Fizzing Whizbees?
Witch Weekly Or The Daily Prophet?
Rita Skeeter or Barty Crouch?
Gyrffindor or Ravenclaw?
Have you Been to A Release Party?
Ever cried while reading one of the books?
Books or Movies?
Had A Dream About Harry Potter?
Been To A Fansite?
Been to JKR’s Site?
Have You Ever Roleplayed?
If So/Do..Who were you/ are you?
Did you use to have an absurd theory?
What was it?
Did you/Do you hide your obbsession?
Did it/ Does it work?
Ever dressed up like a Character? For Halloween or Just No Reason at all?
Ever noticed That You can’t “Spell Hermione without Ron”?
Did you just try to prove that wrong?
Notice That If Harry&Hermione Got Married They’d Have EXACT Same Intials?
Did you just try to prove that wrong?
Have you noticed That Lily Evans And Ginny Weasley are alot alike?
Do you find it weird that Harry & His Dad Fell In Love With Girls So ALike?
Do you know what fanfiction is?
Ever Been To A Fanfiction site?
Do you read fanfiction?
If so, do you like it?
Are you a member of a fanfiction site?
Do you write fanfiction?
Do you like to write fanfiction?
Ever had Harry Potter Candy?
Do you own a lot of Harry Potter Stuff?
Do you have Harry Potter Scene It?
Do You Have A Harry Potter Shirt?
What Character Are You Most Often Compared Too?
Do You Agree With This?
Do You Have Any Nicknames That Have To Do With Harry Potter?
What Are They?
Do you object to being Called By them?
Are Your friends Supportive of your obsession?
Do you have any inside jokes that relate to Harry Potter?
What’s One?(You don’t have to explain)
Do you relate a lot of things to Harry Potter?
Do you love being obsessed With Harry Potter?
Do you wish that you went to Hogwarts?
Have you re-read the books?
Have you had A Harry Potter Themed Party?
Have You Had An RP Party?
Do You Want To?
Have you ever read a Harry Potter Musical?
Have You Ever Wrote One?
Do You Want To?
Have you ever entered A Contest TO Win Something Harry Potter?
If You Wrote A Hogwarts Musical Would You Let People Read it
Are You Going To Write One?
IS The Musical Thing Annoying You?
Am I more annoying than Rita Skeeter?
…In Remembrance to Severus Snape….
…In Remembrance to Fred Weasley…
…In Remembrance to Dobby…
….In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin….
….In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks…
…In Remembrance of Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody….
…In Remembrance of Tom Marvelo Riddle a.k.a. Voldemort….
…In Remembrance of Albus Dumbledore…
In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange…
…In Remembrance of Colin Creevey…
…In Remembrance of Hedwig…
...In Remembrance to Sirius Black...
NORMAL PEOPLE: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast
NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG!
NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings
NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or i'll tell on you!
NORMAL PEOPLE: think that PJO fans are stupid
NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!
NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms
NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation
NORMAL PEOPLE:don't have this on their profile
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Man: Is this seat empty?
Man: Your place or mine?
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
If you repost this you will get a phone call 37 minutes after you repost
If you don't resend this then your love life will be doomed for eternity.
GIRLS REPOST THIS AS "female comebacks"
Scrambles - Meant to Be!
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT
THE MORSE CODE :
ELECTION - RESULTS:
A DECIMAL POINT:
ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost
Special Guest: Jesus Christ, God The Father,
When: When you enter the Gates of Heaven
Where: Kingdom of Heaven
How: Just Ask
Why: Because God Loves You!
... Come As You Are! Bring Nothing but Your Heart and Soul.
98 OF TEENS WON'T STAND UP FOR GOD...
One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books.I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.' I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.
As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him.
So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.'
He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!'
There was a big smile on his face.It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes.We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!' He just laughed and handed me half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.. When we were seniors we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.
Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great.He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days.I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!' He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. 'Thanks,' he said.
As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began, 'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach... but mostly your friends... I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story.' I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.
He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. 'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.' I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way. Look for God in others.
You now have two choices, you can :1) Put this on your profile or 2) Forget you read this and act like it didn't touch your heart. As you can see, I took choice number 1.
There is no beginning or end.. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift.
(I sunno who wrote this... but it's sweet.)
Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hot-line. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities press 3, 4, 5, 6. If you are paranoid, we know what you are and what you want so stay on the line and we'll trace your call. If you are delusional press 7 and your call will be sent to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer you. If you are dislexic press 6, 9, 6, 9, 6, 9. If you have a nervous disorder fidget with the hatch key until the beep. After the beep, please wait for the beep. If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again later and if you have low self esteem, hang up; all our operators are too busy to talk to you.
You Know You’re Obsessed With Percy Jackson When
You go to the Empire State Building and you ask for the 600th Floor
Every time you use the Internet, you thank Hermes.
You burn food to see if it smells good.
You see an owl, you go, “Hi Athena!”
You go on a cruise and you hope the boat isn’t The Princess Andromeda
You've gone to Google maps and looked up Camp Half-Blood’s address
You yell "Annabeth!" everytime you see a NY Yankees hat.
Bring a blue plastic hairbrush with you everywhere.
That every time you pick up a pen, you think it'll turn into a sword
Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up.
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away from them and you have their shoes.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it’s gone.
I'm the kind of girl who would fall flat on my face, get up, laugh my head off, and say " That was fun!
“Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.”
“An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.”
Life isn’t passing me by, it’s trying to run me over.
Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.
Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world?
My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.
Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary.
Did you know Sarcasm is your body’s natural defense against stupidity?
Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hate that.
Paper may beat rock, but cannon ball make big hole in paper.
The pen may be mightier than the sword, but my keyboard can crush your crummy pen!
Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out.
I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!
Don’t follow me, I’m lost too.
This is Bob. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob.
Definition of Your Mom: How to answer a question when you’re bored
Definition of homework: Some form of crude mind control still used in some primitive areas.
One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff.
I’m not afraid of Death, what’s it gonna do kill me?
I’ll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.
When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate.
It doesn’t matter whether the glass is half empty or half full just drink it and get it over with.
It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.
The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER.
So what if we act like immature idiots? We’re having fun.
When French people swear do they say pardon my English?
Aren’t the ‘good things that come to those who wait’ just the leftovers from the people that got there first?
If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out”?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Isn’t it funny how the word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’?
Why isn’t chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa
Life sucks and then you die.
Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?
Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?
Why do people say, “You can’t have your cake and eat it too”? Why would someone get cake if they can’t eat it?
“When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade”
Don’t mess with me I’ve got a stick.
Darth Vader- "Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!"
I smile because I have no idea what’s going on!
Life was so simple when boys had cooties
I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends
Boys are like slinkies, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.
I ran with scissors, and lived!
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder
I’m the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n’ slide.
I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.
I don’t obsess! I think intensely.
Of course I’m talking to myself. Who else can I trust?
Let me know if anything I say offends you, I might wanna offend you later.
One way to figure out how things work, push all the buttons!
When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling
When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Sing “I’m Off to See the Wizard” when sent to the Headmasters office.
I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.
All the good ones are gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.
Stupid shiny Volvo owner.
The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.
“When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.”
“Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it.”
“Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else”
“Real girls aren’t perfect, perfect girls aren’t real.”
“I’d rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I’m not.”
“What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy.”
A recent survey stated that the average person’s greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you’re telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.
I’m not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Death is God’s way of saying “You’re fired.”
“He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.”
“If you know me, chances are you hate me.”
Shut up voices or I’ll poke you with a fork
If at first you don’t succeed skydiving isn’t for you.
Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them.
Set sail in a general that way direction!
It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I’ve found it?
I’m sick of following my dreams, I’m just gonna ask where they're going and hook up with them later.
Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in you face?
All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.
When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.
Education is important, school however, is another matter.
Stupidity is not a crime so you’re free to go.
Excuse me... have you seen my sanity... I think I lost it
The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
Boys are like trees - they take 50 years to grow up.
Is it time for your medication or mine?
Oh, I'm so sorry! I forgot that you're an idiot!
A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends grab those knives and stab those bastards back for you.
To put it nicely, I hope you choke.
It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn.
You don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the slowest guy running from the bear.
God created man before woman because every masterpiece needs a rough draft.
MENtal pain, MENtal anxiety, MENstrual cramps, MENopause... all our problems start with men!
Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas.
Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
It's tourist season, so why can't I shoot them?
Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over.
Those who stand for nothing fall for anything.
Write like no one is gonna read your words.
BE YOURSELF. It's hard to be someone else anyway.
Ever remember the quote "If you believe, you can do it!" Gah! Why is it that no matter how I believe I CAN'T FLY!?
The pen may be mightier, but the sword still hurts like hell.
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved by a suitable application of high explosives.
I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
"I think, therefore I get a headache."
"I smile because I have no idea what's going on."
"I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it."
"Death is life's way of telling you you're fired."
God put me on this Earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now, I am so far behind I will never die.
You know what! Earth sucks, I’m going home!
"What is this 'kindness' you speak of?"
Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them!
"Somehow, in some way that was all your fault."
Retreating! Hell no, we're just attacking the other direction!
Organized people are just too lazy to look for things.
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
Whatever it is -- I didn't do it!
1. YOUR GANGSTA NAME:(first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Emiizzle
2. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fave color and animal): Blue Feline
3. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, and current street name):Rose Hwy X
4. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of mom's maiden name): Schemtag
5. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd fave color and fave drink): Green Brisk
6. YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd letter of your dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, last letter of your moms middle name):Mhoowje
7. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mothers middle name): Marie
8. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets): Black Moose
9. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (fruit, and something that can go wrong) Strawberry Date
10. YOUR PIRATE NAME: (3rd fave color, pirate accessory)Purple Bandana
If your a Demigod copy this into your profile and sign your name:
Thanks for Reading!
Emily (Daughter of Poseidon)
Unsafe External Link